Read a lot of these comments. Been in therapy over 24 years. Was raised by Narcissistic Father. Please do not listen to this video and hear one or two things and think that makes your mother a narcissist. Check with a therapist. People can have characteristics and not have the disorder. They can pass down characteristics to us. Self centered personalities can also be similar to Narcissistic personalities. Get a diagnosis from the DSM. Also, ask a therapist for tools to use that are specific to your relationship.
@leoniekhoury565Сағат бұрын
Thanks very good
@SEllison-gl9fmСағат бұрын
Kids know how to change features on internet the streaming and can watch anything they want so i wonder how parents are even narcissistic these days
@SEllison-gl9fmСағат бұрын
Did watch video sorry
@adctd2gtrСағат бұрын
This is perhaps the most comprehensive, helpful, insightful video I've listened to about narcissists, especially coverts, which I believe are the worst ones because they're so much harder to spot until lasting damage has been done. I've also been studying NPD etc. for over 20 years and the wealth of info about this subject grows and grows for the better thanks to people such as yourself, Ms. DeVor. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge!
@SEllison-gl9fmСағат бұрын
Some narratives never got their butts spanked
@SEllison-gl9fmСағат бұрын
This is why people are worried about the future
@SEllison-gl9fmСағат бұрын
People complaining
@SEllison-gl9fmСағат бұрын
They worried that these people that never got told to lay down and take some licks are going to hand over everything and not know how to survive
@glenndunn4952 сағат бұрын
Hi I am a toaster thank you sincerely you are my newest hero :) makes so much sense now
@rubenv.p.63443 сағат бұрын
Our whole culture and society is increasingly narcissistic and psychopathic. We are fvcked up. The only way to win this game is not playing or playing the minimum. Really, I´m fed up.
@jackleprevost90213 сағат бұрын
The response I like the best is "Education". These people have been "educated" to know the difference. My 30 years of abuse is nothing compared to a College Degree. Here are the two Stages of all Narcissists: 1. Manipulation 2. Malice. The true nature is pure Malevolence. Their brains are not, and never will be equipped for dealing with "healthily" adults in any way shape or manner. They are Toddlers in the mind. Once you discover their Manipulation Tactics; you leave. Once you are gone; God forbid you had children with them. They will begin the malicious crusade of destroying your soul. Anyone tells you any different; that's the Lie. Sometimes it isn't that some men are the "Nice" guy; more than most likely in the relationship with a Narcissist: there is only one decent, human being. They cheat, lie, discard; and attack you personally. The will use children to abuse both you the Parent and the Children. This is their Malice. That Malice will be State and Federally Funded to make sure the Narcissist destroys every man or woman they encounter. And their Family is probably a Cult that keeps the cycle going...we have to get serious about these Demons.
@rothshirtco80833 сағат бұрын
wonderfully presented, very accurate, well spoken. Appreciated =:l
@meadowdevor3 сағат бұрын
Thank you kindly!
@Cowface4 сағат бұрын
I wonder if they hate-watch videos like these. Leaving comments like “Not everyone is a narcissist. Have they been diagnosed? If not you’re just dodging accountability.”
@meadowdevor4 сағат бұрын
We get hundreds of those. 🤦♀️
@every1hasaproblem4 сағат бұрын
Never underestimate an empath who has had enough of their shit!
@Jae-by3hf5 сағат бұрын
I love the way you frame using the term narcissist…I really loathe the “narcissist is overused” as a way to shut down survivors. I do understand its over use, but the way you explained it with the tools you gave us, is so appreciative and validating ❤
@meadowdevor5 сағат бұрын
Awe thanks! I am very protective of our people. ❤️
@janine.moonshine6 сағат бұрын
4:44 MEDIA behaves like a Narcissist and Ai 🤖 is built as a Dark Empath, uses cognitive empathy, like a psychopath's. It works to study your patterns in order to be ahead of you, and manipulate you. So, we cannot be naive. That's why I call all this: The Glo•Вааl Circus 🎪 ~ 'IT' drags you into a vicious Merry-Go-Round 🎡 where you loose your time, energy, consciousness, hope... and finally, your soul. Everyone floats down there 🤡🎈
@PatsyC576 сағат бұрын
I denied my mother any gain, she might claim she was part of. I didn’t walk for my diploma, because I didn’t want to give her an inch, no pictures, no here is my degree. I made sure I didn’t become her trophy, not when she thought I was just one of her limbs. She thought I was a loser. A loser has nothing to give, so I gave her nothing to be proud of.
@julesj58538 сағат бұрын
I know this happens but you all do realize that everyone is a narcissist to a certain extent. Everyone is about what benefits them and they could care less about anyone else. Lol
@Hmmm8-L8 сағат бұрын
I appreciate your video, but I'm surprised that you, as an expert in narcissism, are surprised your mother-in-law made her comment, "even on [your] wedding day!" Surely you know she'd do that sort of thing especially on your wedding day.
@burlingo8 сағат бұрын
Thank you for sharing the truth about division bring a distraction!
@burlingo8 сағат бұрын
*being a distraction 🥴
@tracianderson83848 сағат бұрын
Wow! my son has used every one of these points on me! Thank you so much for talking about this, now I feel validated that it is not me who has flawed thinking and I'm not a terrible person for not jumping every time he says or does these things to me!
@Jam-m7m9 сағат бұрын
It has been a few months since l blocked my Narcissist Borderline Personality Disorder family member from my life. I haven’t checked in on my family of friends at all. 😊. I’m doing good with the not knowing about any drama to try to keep me involved. Just stay away forever
@rollacoastaride19379 сағат бұрын
expecting a narc to be loving and caring is like expecting a python to give a loving kiss to a rabbit, lol
@spiderleenie9 сағат бұрын
"You're doing a good job as a mother ... I felt the need to say that because feedback from someone like me is important." "I am trying to help you out with your decisions ... Because I want to prove to your parents that I can do just as good of a job taking care of you." These are some of the weird comments my now-estranged mother-in-law made to me. I don't like to label anyone I don't like as a narcissist ... But good lord, so much of this applies to my MIL that it's scary. So much of her behavior makes sense to me now.
@terridillon305310 сағат бұрын
They ramping it up They are incapable of evolving The Bible says “Nothing new under the sun.”
@mordelle10 сағат бұрын
I can smell them. For miles. They immediately leave a bad taste in my mouth. But… there have been things that jump out at me. Eye contact… they look like they are trying to figure me out or study me. If someone says that I or something about me is “impressive” especially when I feel like it’s just common decency…? I’m on alert. Flattery is a ding for me. And performance. I can tell when someone is performing… when someone gets on a performance kick when telling a story and it’s all to make them look good… ding. Tendentious humor is an another huge one. If those three things present themselves together? I’m running.
@duromusabc11 сағат бұрын
Narcissists are watching KZbin videos on narcissism too !
@meadowdevor3 сағат бұрын
Very true.
@joplanjanice11 сағат бұрын
I've read empathy can be very dangerous too. Is there any science on that?
@moreanimals688911 сағат бұрын
I don't care about validation. I just want to solve and fix all the things preventing me from getting the narccisits out of my life permanently.
@rozziemarie111 сағат бұрын
Let’s make sure you keep things clear about neurodivergence. I have a narcissistic mother. She’s brutal. Yet she never says I or me. Mostly covert.
@KirstenLambert-nt8iy13 сағат бұрын
Narcissistic ppl are good at shaming and humiliating ppl in front of everyone. Mom did that and my now ex husband did too.
@dorisdeak-qr7eu14 сағат бұрын
A former boss (narcissist) who lost customers according to management, as well as lost me my former job (both being her fault) has just threatened my current job (accidental meeting), couched in careful language that can't be legally challenged, yet signals a clear threat. It's time for the gods to grind their mills.
@warthogA1014 сағат бұрын
.. it's when they have you second guessing yourself, is when you're in their trap very deep. They will also continually outdo any event/situation others tell, ..they always have a similar story, just way worse than yours. Sometimes starting with the phrase "that's nothing, .." The old one upmanship.
@queenofhearts22714 сағат бұрын
So true! I so relate to this. However, making those kinds of direct statements to my mom (or my sis) never works. It only starts an argument. If I say "it's not about you, it's about me" their response is "of course it is, it's ALWAYS about you. What about MY needs? Nobody wants to hear what I need." 😂 Narcissists don't know they're narcissists... so everything feels victimizing to them, unfortunately.
@blakeforrest10814 сағат бұрын
Charging into 2025 with more great information! Thank you for sharing these valuable insights.
@meadowdevor14 сағат бұрын
Glad it was helpful!
@ernestobusnelli589214 сағат бұрын
Sure they will adapt for survival and to avoid detection... Hey Meadow good to see you back, have a great 2025 🥂 We all do it (adapt) in fact I would say that our traits [ CPTSD, CO-dependency, etc. ] is early adaptions for survival that became our character due repetition until getting ingrained in our behaviors, perceptions, interpretation of reality. Now, I do not think social media has made anyone who they are not, I see it as a fertile ground and a positive because it gives them a catwalk to parade themselves and be found out "IF" we have a trained eye to see thru the charade.
@TadYoelLeBlanc15 сағат бұрын
Yup they are easy to spot once you know what to look for. They don’t like men who tell them no.😮
@nicoletribolet6416 сағат бұрын
On holidays with a group of Mums, one received a call from her traumatised son who was still in his early twenties telling her that as a plumber he had been called to investigate the cause of a blocked sink in a rented apartment only to find the tennant had murdered his partner and after dismembering the body tried disposing of it down the disposal section of the sink and he had to escape without alerting the guy and calling police. The narcissistic mother never expressed a word of empathy and instead said, "How do you think I feel, son?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. The minute she got off the phone, I confronted her with her selfish self centeredness. Her poor son had just experienced a truly horrific scene, and she was so selfish she couldn't care less about him. It is so sad.
@edenlass906217 сағат бұрын
I am guilty of intense stares. As someone who has lots of experience with narcs I intently look into peoples eyes to gauge what I am dealing with and, in doing so, also allowing them to look into my eyes so they can also judge me freely. It is a means of cutting out all pretense. It is a behaviour that does get misinterpreted in many, many different ways. Seduction, obsession, autism, intimidation, psychopathy, have all been attributed to holding eye contact, or looking at someone, for longer periods of time. But for me its simply the purest form of communication. I even do it with domestic and wild animals to 'read' them too.
@maizyanderson18 сағат бұрын
Awe shit… I do some of this. Not to this degree but I can see the subtleties in how I show up. Glad I’m aware of it now though and can work through it ❤
@jcristi32110 сағат бұрын
Typically true narcissists don't see the problem or think they need help. Maybe you've just spent a lot of time around a narcissist and are mimicking what you've heard. Now that you hear it coming out of your mouth, you can change it.
@theodavies875420 сағат бұрын
NPD can be so much more subtle. Ask them to repeat the red flag statement. Sorry I didn't get that. It usually sounds horrendous when they repeat it. Autism is not NPD, we often try to give the impression of being able to relate by including what seems like a relevant personal experience. Most people have qualities but you won't make it with a narcissist,always give a measured response not a reaction. Watch out for when your attention is split eg when driving.
@Anj.Z22 сағат бұрын
You just described my mom and this hag in a so called friend group
@dvez754223 сағат бұрын
I've come to the realization that my father never really wanted me. He was an entertainer, a violent, narcissistic alcoholic. Me, an only child. I'm finally at a good place in my life but not after a lifetime of loneliness and tears. I was "in the way" of the "entertainer". I was told from day one that I was an accident. The injury to my eye was from the screaming beatings not an accident at birth where I was told that my optic nerve was damaged. There's so much to tell. There's context. But this is enough. The sadness will always be a constant reminder despite my blessing and life improvement. The feeling of seeing the truth behind the lies and betrayals hurts to the core but one must move forward and thrive and be open to love. Then things hen told me and did to me gave me a lifetime of tears and distrust. That's his legacy. Not the music. Music is what kept me from killing myself. I look forward to my last day on this reality.
@karenneiman856Күн бұрын
Thank you for explaining that when they reach out after you go no contact, they are just testing your boundaries. I did not realize that that was what was happening at the time, but when you explained it, I felt that it rang true and it confirmed my decision. Predictably, when I did not crumble, there has been no further communication from them.
@sunyunduanКүн бұрын
1.sadphishing 2. passive aggressive comment: seemingly nice comments with mean sarcasm 3. savior complex trap: set you up on the alter to be exploited 4. valuing and devaluing for the same quality of you 5 stonewall and disappear with silence treatment
@StrassenbahnBenКүн бұрын
Oh. You're just portraiing my sister. How did you know? :)
@RevekahКүн бұрын
They are all sick of the mind.
@cynthiakim4993Күн бұрын
Thanks for your video. My mother ticks all your boxes 😢
@meadowdevor14 сағат бұрын
Sorry to hear that
@fifitrixibelle9279Күн бұрын
Ahh my mother in law..awful person through and through.. best thing I ever did was cut off all contact with her from myself my 4 sons and now my grandchildren.. haven’t seen her for 16 years she only lives 5 minutes away.. my life has been so much better.. She did fake an illness so my husband would go and see here.. he came back with never seeing her again..
@janmcsween7079Күн бұрын
They won't give a pure compliment. As narcissistic as this sounds, I was handsome when I was a young man. I actually wasn't vain or a jerk. My wife (we met when I was 21) said one big reason she liked me is that I was "unaffected" (her word). I don't know why but it took me a long time to notice that I might have been a decent looking dude. Girls liked me, that was a clue. I'm 6'1" tall and before I got old, pudgy and hound-doggy-looking I kind of looked like a young Rob Lowe. I had freckles, however, and my mother has never stopped reminding me. The thing is . . . the freckles didn't bother me and lots of pretty girls flirted with me. Just like I didn't realize and then later didn't care that I was a handsome guy (for a long time, in any case), I didn't care about the freckles. My mother was relentless, though. I'm 55 now and she's 78 and just the other day I took her for groceries and there was a model on a billboard who was beautiful. She had a lot of freckles, though. My mother said something like, " Too bad about all of those damn freckles, though." She emphasized the word "freckles" like she always did. I said nothing. I gray-rock her now. I've been through a ton of therapy plus I have always been sort of laid back, constitutionally speaking. She destroyed my brother (dead from overdose). The other thing she always does is say, " You boys inherited your looks from your momma, didn't you?" (My brother was a good looking dude, as well). It's funny because from a young age - when I started shaving and therefore looking in the mirror for an extended period of time every other day - I always thought I looked a lot like my dad.
@lovesanimals-m7hКүн бұрын
"Susie said you're beautiful. Pretty, maybe, but beautiful?" What mother would say that to her daughter?
@violetteebel5262Күн бұрын
My x Daughter in law put my son through hell For 11 yrs!
@nehakanauje9788Күн бұрын
Yes.....when I had a baby...I was told by mil that I should thank her. I could only have a child bcoz she gave me her son.....note - my baby was just 2 days old, and after a very abusive episode, this shit came out of her mouth)