Are you really my friend?: Tanja Hollander at TEDxDirigo

[@TannerWilliam07]

Public speaking is the number one fear, death is second. You shouldn't be surprised by her behavior.

[@zes3813]

wrong, no feare about it, idts

[@OMAR-vq3yb]

When people point things like this out it will only make the next person anxious.

[@TannerWilliam07]

@@OMAR-vq3yb Good.

[@sergiojacoby6131]

I know Im quite off topic but do anybody know a good website to stream newly released series online ?

[@dukearthur2473]

@Sergio Jacoby i watch on Flixzone. You can find it on google :)

[@starzintheskyz4477]

I bet not a single one of her "friends" would go out of their way to travel to come see her. If you say yes to everything that people want you to do then they start expecting you to be available on their time only.

[@RoyMontero]

"You cannot make a friend, you can only be a friend." - Roy Montero "Are you really my friend?" - Tanja Hollander

[@lindaclark5911]

Roy Montero if a person has to ask if i am their friend...they aren't their own friend.

[@RoyMontero]

​@@lindaclark5911 I cannot agree with your PERSPECTIVE because I HAVE TO ASK you if you see me as your friend. What if you do NOT see me as your friend but you are simply "FRIENDLY" towards me and I mistake that for friendship? I have heard people say that they heard people who they thought were really deep friends of theirs say, "Hey, we're not as good a friends as you think we are." Presuming or assuming that a person is your friend is NEVER a good idea. You MUST ASK!!!

[@sososanchez3512]

Well Said @Roy

[@tamara3782]

*Why Adults Should Play* Playing is a very important means for development. When we play, we develop new relationships and connections. While it is common knowledge that children need to play in order to develop, which is why we buy them games and put a lot of effort into working out the most suitable games for each stage of their development, it is not so clear with us adults. We do not really like to play. Our relations end up quickly deteriorating into each one of us degrading the other, which ends our playing. As a result, we miss out on a lot of what we can get out of life. We fail to examine all of our options for development as adults, and we thus put a halt to our further development. We have turned our daily lives into a prison of sorts. That is, we need to look, behave and talk in certain kinds of ways-and only in those certain kinds of ways-otherwise, we will not fit in with others and gain their respect. Without their respect, we get treated in ways that harm us. We suffer from living in such a prison, but it has become so ingrained into our lives that we cannot escape from it. The essence of our playing as adults should be that we treat each other positively even if we do not feel like it, and to teach others to do the same. Playing in such a way would emulate the higher state of positive connection that nature is developing us toward, and we would thus draw positive forces of connection that dwell in nature into our relations, and start feeling happier, more confident, and that our lives are purpose-driven.

[@LimboTheory]

Deep. Made me think about the word "friend"

[@angierox6964]

Excellent! I had to learn to say ‘no’, now it’s time for me to start saying ‘yes’ again. Balance.

[@dominicl4600]

I joined facebook when i was in high school. I only added people as "friends" because everyone else was lol. After a few months, I stopped using it because I didn't like the stupid posts and comments that were being made. A couple of years ago, I joined Twitter, and I think it is awesome! I have encountered some remarkable people on there, that I wouldn't do so in "real" life (whatever that is). Now, some people think this is weird and "unnatural", yet it's perfectly alright for them to go onto facebook and post stupid pictures that hardly anyone cares about. The difference between facebook and twitter is that facebook is for people you already know, and twitter is for meeting new people, as I understand it. I don't dislike social media as a whole, it's just facebook I don't really like. There is one thing that crawls inside my brain however. If social networking is such a big concern, and isn't "real", then why the hell is it possible? I thought it was the FUTURE...? I know that the lack of face-to-face interaction makes it hard to maintain friendships/relationships, but it doesn't make it impossible. No friendship is a walk in the park, and it requires committment no matter what way you meet, besides, you can video chat or something to see each others faces. I have a couple of close friends that I have only met on social media, but I honestly don't know what I would do without them, they have become important people in my life.

[@annastarr2043]

I have met friends online that have become nearer to my heart than my FOO.

[@candy2325]

The ending was so abrupt to me. I didn’t takeaway anything from this really.

[@brianthompson5561]

Don't say yes to everything.

[@zorkwork3841]

I think as an artist the experiences Tana had were wonderful. Artists can sometimes isolate themselves due to the proects their working on or for financial reasons. Sometimes when traveling you can have very intense wonderful conversations with people you don't really but for a day or 2 . I think the lesson is not to be isolated by Facebook but to engage with people on a real face to face level. I'm still not sure if they are real friends or just that intensity of meeting people in a concentrated timespan. I'm happy it made for a productive time...but still not sure about the "friendship part"

[@thevipgurlz2802]

when we interact with people personaly we sending signals which is unseen to each other...that makes it real interaction...

[@goodstory5890]

When I had a backhoe I helped a lot of people with it. When it broke down tho, no one stepped up to help get it fixed (under $1000) so I ended up selling it for dirt cheap ($1000) even tho it still had potential for years to come. Thanks and Aloha 🌺

[@angierox6964]

I too have learned those lessons. I’ve harbored a lot of resentment and feelings of being taken advantage of, so I learned to prevent that while still being helpful; now I ask questions… How will they reciprocate? Will they owe me a favor and do something for me in the future? Pitch in money for gas or future repairs… It felt awkward at first, but I’m comfortable with it now and my resentment basket is almost empty! Lol

[@craigsmith1365]

I'm sorry but whats the topic?

[@sososanchez3512]

11 minutes into the discussion, and I don't get the point

[@sumichowdhury1843]

Same here

[@valori3685]

it is only 10:51 min

[@aprilsworld9562]

I thought it was just me

[@rikuyomi]

Why are you watching a video for 10 minutes if it’s yet to feel relevant to you? Is your whole life spent like that?

[@sososanchez3512]

@@rikuyomi Are you trolling?

[@Sheherhis]

Great talk and inspirational!

[@ugi976]

I'm glad she had such a rich experience

[@lindaclark5911]

Um, this is everything i have avoided about facebook. A friend bragging about her expensive camera, grant $$$,& world travel.

[@MiyahSundermeyer]

What a neat talk

[@thaddsreal]

I listen to this talk. Fully appreciate her point and perspective and yet her is a mentality full of privileged experiences. Entitlement is a luxury regardless of your bank account. Also, what kind of friend is she? Selfish reflection continues the problems in our world. Sad

[@agent640]

What is she trying to say???????????!!!!!!!

[@CoolerThanEverybody]

I'm not surprised. I've had to do some public speaking in my day, although not quite to the extent that this is. Didn't enjoy it until I got going and then it was easier. I was basically just making an observational statement.

[@bonniebester606]

I met a Traveling Artist who lived in her little old Van and Camped and Taught Classes. She was so sweet but looked Pale and Frail! Her X who was her only husband of Decades...was a Doctor! Damn...l bet he was a Covert Narcissist too!

[@LynnCooks]

Wow. Simply wow...what an awesome experience.

[@lashawndavis280]

Brilliant!

[@angieserdar]

Really emotional subject 👍🏼

[@beckbabej]

So she got a grant, and a kickstarter to couch surf and meet random people. There's no "documentary" here. It's her personal vacation on other people's dime.

[@Thankyouloveu]

WOW! What’s going on in the comments??

[@carlaland9449]

awesome woman!

[@bryancharnetsky9605]

I found this video misleading!!!

[@anthonyhawkes5012]

Nothing to do with friendship

[@eugplayaz]

WOW! very inspiring.

[@snogvy.2803]

Please save your 11 mins this has nothing to do with are you my real friend or not, it’s simply just “think about how your online relationships affect your real ones and vise versa” not what you’re expecting this Ted talk to be about

[@christinehaigh9807]

Are you really a good friend?

[@catherineallan1397]

She’s just spent 10mins talking about herself, nothing educational at all!

[@OMAR-vq3yb]

Found the cat lady.

[@LarennPBel]

Shut up she looks like she is struggling w something. Have some compassion.

[@LarennPBel]

@@OMAR-vq3yb shut up she looks like she may be struggling w something. Have some compassion .

[@glendaleduque]

Trust. ❤️🇵🇷

[@whatsherface444]

There were no big takeaways from this. Lame.

[@silvercarolina4045]

Agree. I lost 10 mins of my life I cant get back. So glad I didnt "watch" it but rather listened as I worked or I'd be really annoyed. This got a 👎from me. I'm not sure I would have been proud to tell I couch surfed this way.

[@TheRabbitHiro]

Foolish mortal.

[@Vashti0825]

Don't let your kids live on the internet or they'll turn out like her

[@maiasmith22]

Too much individualistic people and egoist

[@lizielue3411]

This ladies body language is weird. Her arms crossed, the sounds coming from her throat -it's like she is suffering from gastritis (if that's a condition?)

[@tobolitocogito]

@Lizie Lue... it’s “lady’s”. If you’re going to needlessly criticize someone, at least get your grammar straight.

[@Penguinstudios123]

Lizie Lue probably social anxiety. Not that that’s the point of the video tho

[@whitesands7900]

Name dropper

[@sodhiramloey7842]

I going out of India

[@CoolerThanEverybody]

Looks nervous as fuck.

[@arimdu1408]

Try doing this as a middle aged man 😂😂😂