Bill Burr - Piece Of Shit House

billburr.com/ and www.allthingscomedy.com/

[@peteranon8455]

Listening to Bill Bur complain actually calms me down.

[@peteranon8455]

"Chromed Aluminum... ****ing ****!"

[@boorhaave5880]

Same. I think it's because I feel less alone with my concerns. Plus he's pretty funny when he loses his shit

[@edwardlewis1963]

like "there ya go! he said it" so now I don't have to

[@DaveDablave]

"This old fucking cunt of a house" I would watch that show. Bill Burr plays a home repair expert who has always dreamed of having his own home improvement show. He is trying to make a pilot out of his own pocket but every house he goes to is chock full of zany characters and ridiculous repair attemps by the homeowners. Eventually he can't deal with it anymore and gives up. Bill's friend/producer starts watching the footage and realizes that its hilarious and tries to convince Bills character to make the show a comedy. Bill's character is reluctant to sell out, what he considers, a noble trade for a few laughs. After some soul searching, and the realization that he and his wife are nearly broke from him chasing this dream, he decides to go ahead with the show as a comedy.

[@nschultz417]

+Dave LeBlanc And he can fill that house with IKEA furniture that he fails at putting together. "Fucking particle board piece of FUCKING shit, instructions make no sense! I WILL buy another one! I'll buy five and break FOUR if I want to!"

[@FredCracklin]

+Dave LeBlanc I'd pay to watch that show.

[@lac2500]

+Dave LeBlanc haha yea he just curses all the repairs and walks to the next project

[@nikadavise-br9lx]

I am with ya bill. After ripping out cat urine soaked carpet and pad to discover a beautiful hard wood floor which i resurfaced by hand and restored. A week later the furnace in my first house tried to murder me with carbon min-oxide and the only reason i am alive today is the Realtor lady who sold us the home became a friend and happened to stop by to see how the floor turned out and unable to wake me at noon(definitely a morning person so that was a huge red flag), she beat on door until neighbors came out and then she got in the house and they called an ambulance who told me i was pretty close to death as i had been asleep in front of floor vent that was spewing carbon minoxide. My spouse had a window cracked so that is probably what saved me(they went to work before dawn and no idea what was going on with the ancient furnace as again we had just bought the place and had only lived in it for less than 3 weeks). A night in the e.r. on oxegen and i hated that flucking house until i got out of it.

[@s0bad]

the vacuum story made me laugh

[@damiananguiano5295]

That's what you call instant karma

[@chrissy9153]

I would love to see bill burr on a home renovation show

[@booognish]

This is an amazing rant ...

[@dillonx11]

frank, when the airlines call you back you can afford the house repairs

[@elisanchez5480]

Fixing up your house and being happy that future owners won't have problems with it isn't weird, Bill, it's compassionate. Compassion is weird to him. XD

[@GearsDemon]

4:45 I'm that way too. The polo shirt wearing comment was hilarious

[@TheLifemission]

I'm sorry you are having a shit of a time with the house. All will be well soon bill.

[@MiketheEye]

I hope one day there is a complete compilation of his house saga. Some of the funniest shit I ever heard was when he was dealing with that flooded room.

[@warlord1873]

Living Legend

[@WiseAilbhean]

These rants get better and better. By the way, wtf was Bill thinking actually recorded himself saying he wants to burn down that house. If it does burn down by accident how can he proove it isn't fraud.

[@dominysynclair]

I was a little worried that marriage would mellow you out Bill. Nope. 47 yo and still has the FIRE! May you live to be 100 with your faculties intact Mr. Burr.

[@icedice6393]

Bill burr would be hilarious on a movie remake of Moneypit

[@ElmoZaPimp]

The mistake he made was buying a house with “character “ f that give me a brand new house

[@ultranitro437]

Hahahahaha Tom Hanks in Money Pit is the movie he references with the bathtub falling through the ceiling.

[@rayray6490]

I feel his pain, i fucking hate dealing with this shit

[@alexmathewmendoza]

When he started talking about flying termites I lost it

[@mydogsnameisbob]

I still maintain that Bill is going to do all this shit, sell the house, and then we'll get an update a month later when the new owner bulldozes it and Bill's absolutely melting down about it.

[@KingOfGamesss]

Yes, I too know the frustrations of House, PC/Laptop and Car maintenance...but it's the price we have to pay, literally. I feel the same way about wanting to make the house and garden perfect for the NEXT people to live in the house too so they will not have to go through the same trouble lol...it's strange though because our home is like a big part of our life and we feel duty-bound to keep it maintained for the years of shelter it gives us...it's like a living thing or a pet...we feel like we owe it something...depending on how long you live in the same home for of course...for myself it has been my entire life in the same house for 31 years...so yeah I feel it is my duty to make this patch of land that has personal value to me a nice place to live for future generations after i'm gone...my one piece (wasn't it sad on One Piece when the 'going merry' "died") of advice is BABY STEPS ('what about Bob')...just work on one thing at a time at your own pace...don't let the stress of time overwhelm you.

[@JC-km5xw]

My house was the same but now I just have to finish painting 😁

[@dyingearth]

By now you've watch that Tom Hanks movie Money Pit a couple of hundred times.

[@alvinyates8525]

Fuck did the home inspection? Mr Magoo? Lol!!

[@briancannon3987]

Zach del la roca sold it for a reason

[@salihyayla4310]

:D im just imagining him FLIPPIN THE FUCK OUT! lmfao

[@chuckgraham527]

Too funny

[@maxjonson1936]

I got into a mortgage at the age of 25 got out at 33 and i'll never fucking look at buying a house for the rest of my life, currently living with my parents and seriously considering getting an RV or Conversion Van and only buying land and not building shit on it. American Dream, LOL!

[@malcolmnicoll1165]

+Max Jonson "It's called the American Dream, because you've got to be asleep to believe it." -George Carlin (1937-2008)

[@edwardlewis1963]

re termites: from wikipedia "Because the worker and soldier castes lack wings and thus never fly, and the reproductives use their wings for just a brief amount of time, termites predominantly rely upon their legs to move about.

[@youmanot123]

Maintenance is good for the soul.Repairs suck ass!

[@edwardlewis1963]

@1:14 "the only thing I haven't had is had an old fashioned bathtub fall through a fucking floor" uh oh; do you have one of those LOL

[@WiseAilbhean]

No matter what kind of house you buy, something about it always makes it a Ford (fix or replace daily). This why I hedge on buying a house. Unless you got some good carpenter friends can get good repair or remodeling deals or can do it yourself, then okay buying a house will be cheaper than the guy who doesn't know how to tighten a bolt. You gotta expect to do at least half of the repairs yourself.

[@UTO420]

It's not dumb to be positive for no fiscal reward. It's just nice.

[@klompsauce]

'Burbs. Prefab homes are shit, I find something new every day

[@montes669]

'Ol Billy Money Bags sold this house for 1.08 million and bought one for $4.7 million

[@runly1]

Exactly why I'm selling my house and going back to renting!! No more homeowner shit... Weeeeeee!

[@mikemcmillan]

This is the funniest shit

[@payden0_086]

Bill Burr bought a laptop an expensive laptop at that and never once thought about getting a PC

[@IronheadOfScroteus]

I know the feeling; I already have my summer planned out for me making repairs on my fucking house. Replace both p.o.s. bathtubs, replace screen door, apply more water seal on deck, fix some exterior walls and paint the whole bastard.

[@tarico4436]

So then the Realtor says: "And the famous comedian Bill Burr used to live here...". And then you sell it for a cool million more. Seriously, Bill, you need to include in your next podcast all the repairs that were successful. And talk about how comfy you are in it now, now that you got all the bugs worked out. And about your computer problems? I don't work for these people, I don't make any money at all when I mention System Mechanic. It's only 15 bucks a year, and it helps you clean your computer. I've had it for eight years now, and it's definitely worth the money. I'm only on KZbin and Yahoo! so I guess that's pretty safe surfin' too. WWNN, IYKWIM.

[@yourhenna]

be grateful you have a house.

[@RoloRolooo]

hey Bill! if you need to replace your laptop, stay away from HP, Acer, and Toshiba at all costs. I would recommend the Surface 3Pro as first choice, then any high end Asus, and lastly Dell (which work well but look like crap). better luck with the house though.

[@starrgeneral1919]

Any other Brits think he was gonna talk about a bit of shithousery?

[@jason420jv1]

LMFAO.....I live in a piece of shit house too. I can so relate.

[@zachflynn6845]

Well how much I might

[@Camzilla0]

How the fuck did the building inspector miss all that shit Bill ?

[@GENERICCEREAL67]

Perhaps you could go on Adam Carolla's contractor show?

[@maksimpushkash9162]

Bill your man it’s your job to fix it

[@keithberns5]

I thought my place was shit.

[@jjmontez]

I mean this sincerely, send me a message, and I'll tell you what to do to fix that computer. I'm a technician and a big fan of keeping things running (My current laptop is going strong after 6 years).

[@JohnnyAce415]

So. Fuckin. Funny. Hahaha, sorry Bill. Yeah, l don't give a tender shit if this was posted 3 years ago.

[@Scotishirony]

laptops are made to only last 2 to 3 years the hdd in it anyway so you have to buy a new one it's a marketing thing genetic parts from god knows where.

[@ElcoMoyer]

Im guessing it wasnt Bills choice to move into that shit?

[@zachflynn6845]

No I am good

[@petermcgill1559]

Most old houses are fucked up. People make shitty repairs because they don't care or don't know better :(

[@dartheria7914]

… or have the money to repair them properly

[@tritondriver1]

Never see this $hit on HGTV. Repairs always turnout perfect on TV.

[@TadGhostal]

you think youre really getting the good metal?

[@astaboy]

WTF? Didn't you hire a building inspector?

[@Tatti12321]

im pretty sure i aus you cant buy a house without one, poor bill

[@supersaiyanzero386]

Bill cannot see your comments here and will not reply. Go to his site and email him.

[@hello12229]

That's fucked up...

[@weepingod]

carpet is so bad for your health, stick to marble

[@Noneofyourfuckingbusiness12]

Not all of us live in a 2 million dollar mansion bill. Us non rich people have real problems to worry about. Sure theres issues with your house, but you can afford to fix it

[@nikadavise-br9lx]

Who sold you that pieceof shithouse? Have a house inspected before buying if you have no idea what to look for in a house.

[@flandersme]

Laptops are only made to last 2-3 years. Desktops 3-4. Getting a laptop with better specs won't protect you from obsolescence.

[@AlexRasengan1337]

Build your own desktop

[@supersaiyanzero386]

Actual smart person understands cyclical consumption. Kudos! cheers.

[@NoName-hh6co]

How about learning the lesson of being grateful for what you have? Especially when others are so unfortunate. This doesn't surprise me as this is coming from a typical arrogant MALE!

[@NoName-hh6co]

+bumrusherer1985 If you are truly grateful you wouldn't even begin to complain. Your statement is a contradiction in itself.

[@FeasableOption]

+bumrusherer1985 You really should just ignor this troll. :)

[@kilodeltanegative4199]

+No Name Dammmmn, why so mad?? You know this is a fan-channel and Bill won't even read your comment. Even if he did I doubt he would give a shit about another bitter feminist.

[@NoName-hh6co]

+Asen Yonchev I'm not a "bitter" feminist, I'm a "proud" feminist. Womens rights should be at the forefront of any political issues especially due to ignorant people like yourself we have in society today.

[@kilodeltanegative4199]

Woah, woah, wait a second, who gives you the right to call me names. You don't know me and don't even know my opinion on the topic and you call me ignorant? Really?? What?? Are you looking for conflict? Are you so insecure about yourself so you are looking for confrontation? Where did I even hint that I'm against women's rights? Are you mental? HUMAN RIGHTS should be at the forefront of political issues, lady. HUMAN RIGHTS, that means both male and female.