Black women deserve more than "luxury."

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[@ForHarriet619]

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[@patriciaduke5169]

I so enjoyed this! Especially when you pulled out the data because there in lies the reality of wealth and the lack there of. I just keep thinking about the stories of how these peoples’ performance of wealth will unfold in the future, like a “behind the music” series. Some of these people are living their aspirations and not their realities. I have to reflect and ensure that I’m living in my reality too.

[@Cozyfi1]

@@patriciaduke5169 They are able to do it because they date out. Look at those stats and you see black men make even less than black women on average. This is why black women are the majority bread winners. WW on average marry to get up in wealth. Bw can do the same but y'all are denying yourselves of that for broke bandits or not being Hypergamous.

[@millsykooksy4863]

I have $10 a month

[@talkswitTK]

Great chat. Luxury goes way beyond labels… Looking for another source of life insurance beside those purchased thru employer. If u know/have a reputable carrier please lemme know.

[@karebear9827]

Daaaaam Sis, not to be "rude" in anyway & they say Beauty is Skin deep which is Pure facts (for the most IMO) so I just wanted to express with you it's waaaaaay beyond the outside beauty; intellectual beauty; moral beauty & more & speaking from a SISTERS perspective tht exceeds the assumptions of how you speak & eloquently express points...IM LIKE OMG She's Def a SOUMATE (to the 10th power) dam I wish we can meet & talk abt angles tht seem to be oblivious to many ppls lower-self critiques! Much Love Boo🥰 😊 🙌🏽

[@natachahenriquez1488]

"If you have a lack of generational wealth, you are the safety net". There aren't enough words to describe how scary and devastating that reality is.

[@ayanomar1408]

this was real and painful to hear, I am the saftey net and I cannot afford to make mistakes😭

[@louise-yo7kz]

Yes!!!!💯

[@smilergal89]

@@ayanomar1408 okaaaayyyy. Nonetheless I can go at my pace and divest from the marketing machine that is just now starting to appreciate black women as a powerful consumer segment

[@AmsaH5]

I am the safety net… I cannot live my life without having some of my “wealth” diverted from my bank account to help my family members.

[@louise-yo7kz]

@@AmsaH5 🥺

[@StephaniePerry]

I love to see Black women embrace a life of EASE. I get to see that, because my audience is older and have moved beyond luxury as an aspiration into peace of mind. They've tried "Black Excellence" and consumerism, but it was just a bait and switch. It was just a way to keep Black women striving for something. Instead, ease is opting out of being everyone's superwoman and diving fully into what brings more joy.

[@donnabohanon1570]

Yes!

[@Boahemaa]

Opting out is more rewarding because it is sustainable.

[@SamMKKK]

Come on somebody. You really preached to me just now I’ll tell you that.

[@acaraj]

Ease, yes!

[@serenity6831]

I love this

[@tmarie69]

Luxury for me is waking up and being able to do whatever the fu*k I wanna do. Leisure is ABSOLUTELY luxury.

[@bd10232003]

This!! I feel that! I wish I could just wake up and only do what I want...

[@monimuppet6132]

Yup.

[@mimia.4810]

But you need money to do that. Most people work day to day with no leisure because of stress to pay bills.

[@tmarie69]

@@mimia.4810 IA. I don’t have a luxurious life at all was my point. I NEED to work. Which sucks.

[@naya4607]

@@mimia.4810 exactly

[@nelisiwesikhosana3539]

“It is much easier to get a Chanel bag than it is to gather the support and resources necessary to take a break whenever you need it” Kimberly N. Foster

[@YaraMel]

This was it for me!!!

[@marie-francoiset9402]

she has no idea what a real Chanel bag costs. if you can afford - not go into debt - but TRULY afford a chanel or birken bag you definitely have the resources to take a break. It's just the bag must be more important to you. You are making a choice. That's a mindset issue. Not a cash & resources one.

[@conflictpersona8]

@@marie-francoiset9402 depends on what we mean by break... bc one day a weekend is different then being able to take 6 mo. A year etc bc a bag is cheaper in that sense

[@belindaa9971]

Preach it it s true

[@ayodari_style]

It is much easier to click a button and shop than it is for me to take a vacation or even have a kid free day. A LOT easier.

[@KimandKamJam]

Luxury is good insurance, luxury is a savings account that allows a spouse to take time off for a health emergency and knowing your bills will still be paid, luxury is knowing that you do not have to work that overtime because the rent is due at the same time your car broke down. Luxury is beyond material

[@_Kim_Possible]

I agree with this. I'm so tired that any movement with black women has to run deeper than wanting the best out of life or something political or deep. Luxury is more than a bank acc or designer

[@bookaholicblue2169]

Yes! Peace of mind is priceless.

I agree it is also beauty. But why chase more European standards of beauty?

[@idkwuzgoinon]

This ‼️

[@bt2598]

I don’t think peace of mind is a luxury. It should be the basics covered

[@dinaisis2991]

"Rest is expensive and it costs more than an IG photoshoot." - There are SOO MANY quotes in this video! Great job handling this topic 🙌🏽

[@LexaKarlyn]

Right?! She just kept coming with that wisdom.

[@dinaisis2991]

Honestly literally gave a standing ovation in my room after I finished watching.

[@mcsaism]

Kimberly the quotable queen

[@DorothyDandridge]

👏🏽🔥🔥🔥

[@MynameisNOTthepoint]

BARS!!!!

[@CIARAELAINE]

I very much appreciate this video. Ever since the "black girl luxury" trend emerged I immediately thought of how black women are now being encouraged to embrace happiness through depreciating assets. I'd love to see a "black girl wealthy" trend instead. Luxury is great, but let's uplift the more important things that allow you to obtain these luxuries.

[@chinavaughan6383]

I would like to see ‘black girl healthy’, physically, emotionally and spiritually 🙂

[@aquaearthnfirequ_pinsnsavi1721]

What is this "black girl wealthy/luxury" stuff??? I've never even heard of this I'm so broke! Got my head focused on survival.

[@1_Dopesoul]

I approve this message!

[@bmwjourdandunngoddess6024]

Agreed!

[@bmwjourdandunngoddess6024]

@@chinavaughan6383 YES! We can move through movements!

[@acaraj]

"Buying self-esteem." Whew, amen. Almost makes me wanna turn back time, but my 20 year old self never would have listened.

[@rashida9693]

My 31 yr old self is having a hard time listening, Im just now getting a little money to buy nice things

[@baby_shii1263]

I'm glad at 19 i didn't have to learn this lesson the hard way. The truth is alot of us black women/girls don't know what true love is or what it looks like. For me personally, i was able to love myself once i found pure love in the Lord. Despite the fear of backlash some older BW get, I hope our older BW continue to guide and advise us younger BW into making better decisions for ourselves because there is always one or two that will appreciate your wisdom and take heed to your words.

[@jackbyrd53]

Let's not forget that many of these unboxings and hauls are "sponsored" by the brands OR even rented/loaned. These social media people are "influencers". Brands want you to think "everybody is getting one, except you." We are looking at commercials, not real life.

[@lrs1519]

Hellooooo! I always have to remind myself of this when I start feeling “bad” about my life.

[@VictoriaWhitlock]

Did you ever assume white women were loaning handbags for unboxings?

[@shanaew.2388]

This is it.

[@candygirl20048]

Woo! That last line hit me in my chest!

[@Mmeme2023]

@@VictoriaWhitlock white women were gifted the bags, that's why 5 years (or so) ago there was an outcry against people who wear sponsored brands but don't declare it. Remember when Kardashians started wearing Birkins? Later we discovered they were given to them and not bought by them. Some influencers are borrowed product while others are "gifted" but the point is it was not from their pockets

[@lifeonabudget8513]

For me, it's the "get luxury at any cost" that makes me roll my eyes.

[@DosesOfZia]

I agree.

[@Nikki-ks6wi]

👏

[@WellDamn24]

What makes me roll my eyes is the faux lux. But then I had to recognize that the thirst was honest and did not deserve derision.

[@missmack2328]

Why tho?

[@smithj8026]

Sometimes the luxury is only possible with a sponsor. A man paying the bills. Which can stop if you do not meet whatever expectation they have of you. Sometimes that is the “at any cost”.

[@leavonfletcher4197]

"Poverty is not a mindset. Poverty is a political choice. It's the result of repeated structural failure". Great quote.

[@naya4607]

To push it further, poverty is necessary for wealth’s existence. I disagree that it’s from structural failures. The structures create and maintain this dynamic.

[@KayDejaVu]

Today, we have so many more options than our grandmothers.

[@Bimbogum]

I’ve noticed- personally, that black women in luxury for a lot of women is more about the specific type of femininity that some black women have been denied (the pure, elegant old money aesthetic usually only designated for white women). Eg, I’ve seen phrases like “Unapologetically girly without the fear of being accused of trying to be white” and then the bow of success and materialism on top is additional defence of that femininity. Like I live like this and I have visible wealth so what power do you have over me? It’s a shallow type of self worth that satisfies the inner child but doesn’t address the self image issues and classism that comes along with it. With this in mind I think the homogeny of what black womens luxury means make a lot of sense- it’s a reproduction of white standards in black skin. It’s empowering in the way it’s subversive visually but shallow in its content in terms of depth and nuance

[@omowhanre]

Umm… excuse me ma’am, are you a professor? Were you homeschooled? All I know for absolute certain is that you’re a reader, because readers are thinkers who know how to organize their thoughts and contextualize ideas to form opinions. Anyways, thanks for there thought and taking time to wrap your idea in beautiful prose.

[@dudeeveryone391]

I’m a little wine drunk right now so the extent of my eloquence is going to be to say god damn girl you are so smart. Love this comment and it’s examination.

[@tmarie69]

“It’s a reproduction of white standards in black skin” DAMN!!! This is 💯

[@brittdavis1]

This was so well put and right on the money 🎯 🥰❤

[@naya4607]

Hit the nail on the head fr with this one!

[@martinlofsnes6966]

YES! "We have to acknowledge that these individual pursuits of superficial comforts will never amount to a mass movement to better the lives of all black women"

[@MimiMoments]

How much of our enjoyment of expensive things is rooted in our ability to show them? PHEW

[@emmyems5171]

This was the one!

[@MimiMoments]

@@emmyems5171 TRULY

[@em.415]

Yes, the feeling that you have one up’ed someone. I’ve been guilty of this. But why do we do this? Low self esteem? There’s a book called the ‘Narcissism Epidemic’ that delves into this.

[@lrs1519]

I cannot stand a “look at me and my thingssss” type of person. Buy the bag or the decor, you don’t have to flaunt it. Flaunting it is trying to put it in peoples (who don’t make a difference in your life) faces. I can’t stand it!

[@faqu529]

That was a bar

[@iamcurtisbryant]

I’m a black man and this video helped me. I’ve been an entrepreneur for many years and you’ve just helped me really give myself praise for the many leaps of faith I’ve taken in my life. Choosing my mental and physical health over money and luxury, that I actually don’t care about. I want a tiny home on a large piece of land, with a farm in the front. That’s my form of luxury lol

[@so.many.obstacles]

Kudos to you. I’ve been looking for a travel trailer to roam. Eventually, I want your latter desires. I’ve already started downsizing.

[@iamcurtisbryant]

@@so.many.obstacles thank you! And I totally think that you should document the entire journey. You will inspire a lot of people.

[@user-dq7cm6ug4h]

Same. I used to think I wanted to live in the city, but I've reached the conclusion over the past few years that I want to purchase a ranch and some land one day. I love the idea of starting each day with a horse back ride. I left the workforce to finish graduate school, and once I start working again once I pay down my debt I'm going to start saving for a ranch!

[@datBoondockingdiva]

Yes, so agree. I've fallen in love with tiny spaces & minimalism. I would rather have less stuff/status---and more of time w/ financial stability. Doing part-time Van Life in my Roadtrek RV is teaching me so much about how to have less stuff & more freedom/adventure with ease.

[@iamcurtisbryant]

@@user-dq7cm6ug4h morning horse back rides sound amazing. With tea waiting for you when you return. You’re gonna get that and more

[@destinysgrandchild40]

Storytime. I had a friend who spent 2 months rent on a pair of Louboutins and a designer outfit for a social event. When she tried on the outfit, she had a break down because she didn't realize that her wide leg pants made it difficult to see the red bottoms. She ended up NOT GOING to the event and owing her landlord late fees because her displays of wealth she didn't have weren't visible enough to the people she was trying to stunt on.

[@saav1385]

Damnnn thats crazy

[@LeeyaAre]

This made me so sad.

[@jenmar9428]

WTF! This is beyond idiotic. 🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

[@DavidKen878]

That's pathetic and idiotic for so many reasons.

[@anayotothe]

WOW

[@Fabsocialism]

It stresses me out that you have to qualify yourself so much to argue what people will likely say. The bad faith watchers who were never going to get it will have people disproving 50 arguments. But sometimes it brings out even better points!

[@ForHarriet619]

Yep. It's actually really useful to think through counter arguments.

[@Girlforaction]

When you said we don't have retirement savings that really hit me. Like it's nice to have a luxury bag or two. But it's much more rewarding to have a nest egg and being able to take care of yourself during an emergency.

[@iamlaurengill]

This! I've been examining my definition of luxury. I love luxurious things. But it's not luxury if I'm not financially whole.

[@aminatmuibi571]

@@iamlaurengill thank you for those last words. “It’s not luxury if I am not financially whole”

[@minismalls3096]

The bags don't even matter cause if you're caught wearing it all the time people make fun of you for it

[@niara961]

Y’all joints don’t have retirement plans?

[@josephinebournes8212]

FACTS 💯

[@teyah3512]

I've been watching for years. I can truly say this is some of your best work yet. As a black woman who grew up upper middle class, then had to watch my mom rebuild our wealth on her own when she was divorced, this needs to be discussed more. Going from riding in a mercedes to literally losing our house makes you realise how precarious "luxury" is for black people/women. Luckily I was still able to study abroad and move to Europe as an adult and am now working on my PhD in London (studying in part environmental poverty/well-being) . But literally there are almost NO black women in my programmes, and I noticed us dwindling in numbers the more education I received. Education is a HUGE determinant of wealth that I see very few of us being able to take advantage of. Also, American "rich" is very different from European rich. Generational wealth, which is what most white (western) Europeans have, where every person in your family has been collecting assets for over a century, means you're always going to be okay. I know very few Americans, let alone Black ones, in that position. I truly don't think Americans understand that "luxury" is a trap that distracts us from the real issues. Because my white, rich European friends don't all have designer stuff. But all of them have ZERO debt, parents who pay their all bills/tuition, and will for sure be buying a house in their 30s. THAT'S what we want. EASE. Let me not lie, I'm now in this position. But my mom has had to sacrifice her entire life and practically her joy in order for that to be the case. I don't want any other woman to deal with that, because my white friends' moms are happy. And like you said, for that to be the case for us, it comes with structural change!

[@wavixen]

This comment is EVERYTHING!!!

[@teyah3512]

@@wavixen ❤️

[@naya4607]

I think we should examine how that European wealth came about (colonialism, slavery, and capitalism). We want ease, but not through those means of exploitation. The question now is, how? And how do make life easy for everyone on this planet and what sacrifices are necessary?

[@teyah3512]

@@naya4607 I am in total agreement. My point above may not have emphasised this enough, so my apologies, but when I discuss structural change I meant that we as a collective people need to invest our resources (and I mean that in the most nuanced way: money, time, energy) in change for everyone. I think because European wealth and the systemic violence that created it are what hyper-focus/have created the emphasis on accumulating as many "things" and as much "luxury" as possible, I feel disheartened that some in our community are under the impression that adopting this (very broken) model is some form of radical progress. more, I feel this focus is a distraction as we assume having certain things/luxuries is what will make us feel better about our condition as a people, when it doesn't. I hope that makes sense, I'm a bit tired as I write ahahaha. I'll also add that as someone who studies the intersections between environmental change, race, gender, and poverty, I have some ideas about what we can do. As Kimberly mentioned in the video, black people don't have money like that collectively, so I don't think "sacrifices" as you mentioned are the best way to go about change per se. I instead have found that conversations like these, ones that challenge dominant ethics regarding consumption, money, culture, identity are the most effective. Because if we know that a lot of black people, well people in general in this economy lol, are not that wealthy but still instinctually want to uplift Beyonce' and her Tiffany's collab (or just the general simping for billionares who literally don't care about us...) I think the problem then becomes clear to be one of ideas and culture. I follow the view that violence is three-fold: (1) direct, (2) systemic, and (3) cultural. Under this view, it's often argued that cultural violence is the most insidious, thus effective, due to the lack of traditional visibility and attention. (Neo)liberal capitalism (inc. (neo)colonialism, slavery, etc.) is a very compelling and addictive idea whose violence began and is most maintained through culture (in my view ), and we have a huge project on our hands fighting its entrenchment. When it comes to sacrificing, the only people who need to be doing so in my opinion are white, I think black people (esp black women) have sacrificed enough. I think this is where those who want to be allies need to step in and hold themselves and their more racially privileged counterparts to account.

[@teyah3512]

I'll also add that I answered assuming you were a black woman based on the community norms, but please correct me if I'm wrong (:

[@Treecylady10]

I’m a nurse that worked the Covid unit for over a year. After so much stress I took five months off, to me that was such a luxury. To be able to take the time to rest and focus on my health and not have to worry about paying bills made a world of a difference. Financial health is also a part of holistic health. Thank you for the video, loved the commentary as usual.

[@lorealjane9192]

So you made bank

[@babeadhis]

All this, I wish had been diligent with my finances over the two years I started my career . I am originally from Kenya and I am mentally exhausted. If I had not used my money on materialistic things, and saved it, would have been financially well off to take a leave of absence and travel to Kenya for rest. This is a motivation.

[@labelle9921]

@@lorealjane9192 And/or she saved/invested wisely.

[@Treecylady10]

@@lorealjane9192 The money was good. I won’t lie, my mental health took a hit from working so much.

[@Treecylady10]

@@babeadhis No one is perfect girl. Money and finances is not a topic appropriately addressed, especially in certain communities. I actually had to seek financial advice from a professional to become better with saving/investing. Don’t be to hard on yourself. Start saving now. Peace to you.

[@VENIKA]

I do not care to see myself represented in any kind of luxury movement, I want a freedom for black women that represents so much more than the acquisition of “stuff.”

[@VictoriaWhitlock]

There can be multiple freedoms for black women

[@hellohey000]

To see yourself represented in any social media hashtag is herd mentality. Want that freedom for yourself. Because your definition of freedom may not be others definition of freedom.

[@VENIKA]

@@VictoriaWhitlock So write your own comment about what you want.

[@VENIKA]

@@hellohey000 If your definition of freedom is as self-serving as just wanting a Chanel bag I do not want to be in community with you, God bless.

[@hellohey000]

@@VENIKA God has blessed me thanks. Blessed me to see people as individuals and not judge them based on my personal opinions of how I think they should live THEIR life. Blessed me to see that All of life is a struggle and when I see happy bw lay that cross down to rest , I clap for them. We shouldn't demand that they stay in misery until "We All" get to your idea of freedom. May God bless you with the grace to understand that bw don't have to constantly struggle from birth to grave and that a little bit of splurging is ok. In Jesus name Amen 🙏

[@ashlovestoshop]

“Trying to repackage the same old materialism using social justice language, isn't it.” This was the part that hit for me! I never could get into the “Black Women Deserve Luxury” movement. It's obtuse, it's misrepresentative, it's downright callous. I'm so happy I'm not the only that thought this.

[@SivvySiv]

I have just learned overtime not to want certain things that I could never afford. I am an average midwesterner. I make a little less than 40k a year. I went and graduated from college with a science degree, first in my immediate family who I’m also very close to. Both of my brothers have trades and are good dudes as well. I drive a Ford SUV. I don’t know brands when I see them. Have never been on a luxurious trip and don’t have “luxurious” items, and it is hard as a black woman in this social media age to have self esteem, but luckily I have my mom (was very close to my dad he passed away in ‘10) and good friends around me who remind me of my worth as a person and I’m happy to just be in good health and knowing how to be resourceful to myself. I’m newly married to my college boyfriend and have our first baby on the way at 33, he’s 37. We both own houses. He is a special education teacher. I’m happy about myself and my life.

[@NeoceanJ]

Congrats on the baby, wishing you the safest and healthiest pregnancy, delivery and post partum 😊

[@SivvySiv]

@@NeoceanJ thank you very much for this sis ❤️ ♥️

[@chxrbb_dxllhouse5403]

your life sounds awesome I'm happy for you especially with a new baby!!! social media can be a cancer

[@SivvySiv]

@@chxrbb_dxllhouse5403 thank you so much my sister ❤️

[@DanielleP0314]

your life sounds incredibly content!! congrats on your engagement and upcoming baby.

[@Naomisnotes]

Thank you for this Kim. As someone who has grown up in poverty and often tows the breadline I felt so alienated from the BGL movement. As a plus size woman especially. Due to what I’ve seen I’ve always just yearned for my shoulders to drop , that’s luxury to me. Not carrying the weight of first born anxiety , internalised shame , guilt for being in a first world country and still struggling , guilt of not just “grabbing life by the hands “ but your video has allowed me to take a step back and evaluate why I feel the need to desire a form of luxury that was never even meant for me

[@seeyoucu]

👏👏👏👏

[@karabokhwiane7593]

Felt

[@bd10232003]

I feel the same way...

[@100Remedios]

Yes 💗💗💗

[@camij9371]

Whew! A word.

[@joanbereading]

What’s annoying is when people try to claim this movement as revolutionary or empowering when it just buys in the same consumerist system. The same could be said about the billion dollar cosmetic industry preying on our insecurities and making us think getting a BBL is “empowering”

[@kl8581]

It’s not a movement it’s an aesthetic

[@Mimi-dv8ts]

No one ever said it was revolutionary.

[@VictoriaWhitlock]

Not everyone sees those pics and wants to buy things. Some are just inspired

[@natashawiley6428]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@marie-francoiset9402]

that's a personal problem. not the fault of the influencers if someone lacks self-esteem and feels the need to buy what they can't afford. and girls getting bbl are doing it to attract dudes. i don't know of anyone saying that's empowering.

[@Zhajique]

This literally made me cry. Luxury being luxury because of the exploitation not despite it is something that really got me.

[@locturallylocs9097]

Lol no need to cry this wasn't that deep. Please watch Chrissie's latest video reply she's twisting the whole concept of black women in luxury and she's a huge hypocrite.

[@hallihallo1236]

This video made me realize that what I really envy wealthy people for is not their cars or houses but the ability to just opt out of the endless productivity cycle just because they need it. Watching your videos is always opening up new perspectives - thank you!

[@KAM-rl6tz]

When I joined Facebook in 2010, I came across this quote which hit me like a ton of bricks. It was an aha! moment. “The desire of gold is not for gold. It is for the means of freedom and benefit.” Ralph Waldo Emerson I agree with your comment. For me, wealth absolutely means freedom in a general sense. It’s liberation from the rat race.

[@queenamidala3620]

All of our choices are political. The food we eat, the shoes we wear, the jobs we have, even who we sleep with. To pretend otherwise is either ignorant or purposely obtuse.

[@dannyokezie7656]

Can I quote you on Twitter?

[@cpeacenlove]

Exactly.

[@DavidKen878]

The choices we make are due to our individual mindsets. Plain and simple. Mindsets we have because we live our lives focused on what others think and because we constantly compare ourselves to white people. There's no reason anyone should be living their life based on how someone else thinks they should. Your choices are your choices and if you're making them based on politics, then that's on you. We need to start taking responsibility for our actions and stop caring about what other people think. Please don't think I'm coming from a place of rudeness or anger, I'm just giving my opinion.

[@globisdead]

@@DavidKen878 The problem with this line of thinking is that it comes with the assumption that whatever financial situation you find yourself in is because of your bad financial or career decision making habits, when in most cases involving ethnic and marginalized groups, it's a lot more than that.

[@DavidKen878]

@@globisdead Let me guess, it's because of White People?

[@ArenDella7]

A year after I transitioned from the cooperate hustle to private practice I realized... for the first time... that I was holding my broken places together with Burberry. After growing up in PWI's K through college I took great pride being able to "hold my own" in these ecosystems designed to keep me out. Code switch immaculate. Hair on relatable. Always ready to tell you where I found the blazer. After a year of not having to be the hippie in business clothing... not having to remember a handbag rotation... be "on" as soon as I walk into the building... I had to unlearn a lifetime of defense behaviors. Sorting through what things I really enjoyed consuming for me and what body armor I could get rid of because I no longer needed to protect my placement in spaces that weren't for me in the name of ✨treating myself✨ There's not enough conversation around Black women turning the trauma of feeling required to look above board into Bougie Black Girl Tiktok.

[@danispriggs7818]

Could not have said it better sis, bravo and continued success on your and our journeys towards self actualization

[@ArenDella7]

@@danispriggs7818 Same to you friend. 🙏🏾

[@pisceanbeauty2503]

I think a lot of us hit some turning point where the things we do to assimilate and survive get internalized into actual virtues versus being necessary evils.

[@user-dq7cm6ug4h]

💯

[@eyekantspele9548]

problem is, when people hear "black people don't have money" they don't hear "it's not black people's fault we don't have money"

[@joyfitzgerald9878]

💯

[@engineeringbookisha]

I almost cried when you said we all deserve to be well cared for.

[@locturallylocs9097]

The problem is that nobody else will do that for us, so black women should put themselves first. Black women in luxury is about black women putting themselves first. This video has the worst take. Pleae watch Chrissie's latest video.

[@kionnakelly2918]

@@locturallylocs9097 exactly

[@mellax.7004]

@@locturallylocs9097 I agree. Black luxury isn’t necessarily about external/material, expensive things, but for black women to put themselves the first and live the best life they can.

[@DoraWinifred]

Is anyone confused by the current conflicted messages of “save the planet consumption is bad” with the images of Instagram and wanting to be like influencers having walk in closets and buying fast fashion to feel closer to this influencer lifestyle

[@ritaevergreen7234]

I’ve never heard of that but I’m assuming it’s the ones trying to come off looking expensive are to get closer to influencers who are shopping the sustainable clothes that are really expensive?

[@shamelessvanity1415]

💯. I am disturbed by all the waste in the packaging.

[@marie-francoiset9402]

"sustainable" clothes are super expensive.

[@ritaevergreen7234]

I should also add that having sustainable clothes seems to be the new marker for inclusion in that space. However I notice people weaponize it to bully people who cannot afforded sustainable or bother to thrift (which is being seen as something “cool” rather what it was intended for)

[@marquitadavis879]

I love the "black women in luxury" movement, but I don't want to go broke to achieve it. Luxury for me is being debt free. Paying off my car, paying for college, and working because I want to not because I have to. I've always lived a life of luxury, but my mom didn't go broke to provide it. Luxury is however you define it.

[@47shadows76]

Good Lord, I love you! I wish more ladies thought like you. This is consumerism on steroids especially when Black women owe the MOST DEBT! Don't fall for the okie doke.

[@sweetcaroline7107]

@@47shadows76 no one asked dusty

[@Heykay34]

Rest is luxury. When you need a break or time to yourself and your thoughts, being able to rest is priceless.

[@Carolina_Berean]

I was dumb AF in my 20s. Fumbled lots of bags and missed tons of investments. In my 30s I’ve finally found true happiness and contentment. I talk to younger women about finances now. I could have easily been a millionaire if I wasn’t caught up in the “luxury” movement. I’m focused on building generational wealth now.

[@sherthetruth]

Not Kim looking luxurious while talking about luxury.

[@lifeonabudget8513]

I was about to say the same😄 she does look great!

[@Blakmagic88]

Yep… someone looks like they’ve been enjoying the hell out of capitalism…

[@triaverse]

@@Blakmagic88 isn’t that the point though? There’s nothing wrong with wanting to live well and not be treated like a mule. Literally, we need that. Collectively. But the BW in luxury movement does absolutely nothing for MOST Black women. And if it’s not doing anything for Black women collectively then… where is it actually going? For a few Black women to live good and the rest squander? That’s already the norm. There’s nothing revolutionary about that.

[@sodamnsexy16]

@@Blakmagic88 judging by your history of comments on this channel Kim really bothers you. We have to participate in capitalism to survive, that’s the problem, what are you not understanding?

[@kentara_excelsior]

That’s exactly what I thought !

[@CreoleKing1986]

"Kim's Life Lessons - not to be confused with financial advice"🤣🤣 God I love this woman so much

[@wowwee0]

Damn. This was insightful. It hit me hard as an Afghan woman. Got a lot to think about my views toward my own community now.

[@lastdays9163]

Kim you have found your stride. This format is fluid and gettable and powerful. 🔥❤️🍰

[@ForHarriet619]

awww thank you!!

[@itowilltube]

@@ForHarriet619 yes gave very next gen opah super sunday without the religious aspect. I felt feed even though she was doing the eating.

[@yes_anotherone3260]

Repeated structural failure includes the billions of women who've had their wages stolen from them. I met a woman today who worked for for the same hospital for 40 years and was fired when she was home recovering from a car accident...pension gone 😢 According to her, this happened to many black women.

[@littleeva]

I grew up in the 60's and 70's around a lot of wealthy white people in NYC. At that time it was considered "declasse to outwardly display your wealth. I think that changed in the late 70's with the whole designer jeans movement, when people wore labels on their backsides. And then the 80's started with folks wearing Izod and the "preppie" attire. All of this buying stuff is nothing but making other people rich. If you want to wear really nice stuff, go to thrift shops in wealthy neighborhoods.

[@CHayes-xr4yi]

The message “nobody cares, work harder” is so prevalent, at least with my employer, and the people I’m surrounded by. It’s relieving to hear someone stand for justice and compassion. Thank you Kim, for your knowledge and empathy 💜

[@ihavethots1261]

jacob on married at first sight wore a shirt that said that...that's when i knew he was trash

[@alishainc]

This video was immaculate Luxury is leisure like Kim said. It's about choosing you when you need to. I just quit my job because they were taking advert-age of me AND I'm legally blind. I was able to opt out living off of my savings until I find something better. That's luxury to me, taking time for yourself; to craft the life you deserve.

[@LexaKarlyn]

Congrats on starting the next chapter of your life!

[@samacha9055]

I’m old and in my youth, I definitely bought an overpriced luxury handbag with a near maxed out credit card and nothing in my savings account. It was anything but a luxurious life, but I wanted to “look rich.”

[@missmytime]

Some fun facts: People with wealth are not focused on luxury. They’re actually focused on legacy. And, if the luxury “movement” wasn’t Eurocentric, the it would resemble African wealth more than it does Western wealth. You’d have to be familiar with African culture to understand the difference (and being cultured is also a better measure of “luxury” by the way). so don’t let anyone shame you when you highlight the whyteness of the luxury movement.

[@fionadebrah3308]

Damn Kimberly. Why am listening to this and tearing up??. I just felt a release listening to you. Thank you for this video 😭 .

[@user-gn4ri1kq9j]

"It's easier to stunt than to focus on creating the conditions that would better all of our lives" WHEW, so true

[@Msladyrae92]

Its just not for me, things don't bring me happiness. I get my happiness from authentic nature experiences where I can let my hair down. And I feel like alot of ppl ( in addition to many other things) are doing it for the internet aesthetics. It takes more energy to make things "perfect" looking than to just go do the thing and actually relish in the experience. All in all, to each their own. I encourage all ppl to seek happiness in whatever form that comes in.

[@thatblvckhippie1911]

Same here. I started to let it get to me even though I know in my heart that im more of a modest home, homestead with chickens and goats, anti capitalist, thrift store type. I love my life and cannot believe I ever tied my self worth to an aesthetic

[@Msladyrae92]

@@thatblvckhippie1911 sometimes we fight our heart’s truest desires because we are told in society that they aren’t good enough. Which goes back to what Kim said about the goal post for luxury always moving. Ps. Chickens 😍😍

[@BellesView]

@@Msladyrae92 Absolutely!

[@yellowbears1]

Great video. A couple years ago I got caught up in watching niche perfume hauls. Within that year I purchased over 60 bottles of perfumes/colognes. 2 years later some have expired and are rancid smelling. So much perfume I couldn't use in a lifetime and buyers remorse. A waste of money and tough lesson learned. On a lighter note recently I took a work assignment that kicked my butt for 8 weeks but paid a heafty allowance. This allowed me to take 3 weeks off work (between assignments) to relax and not work. It's my first time as an adult that I don't feel I HAVE to work. My bills are all paid in advance and I'm not pressed for anything. I've learned I actually enjoy cooking, and dusting and doing little things around my house. No purchases of big, fancy items that lose value but "me time".

[@aishahb8336]

Our system is definitely failing us, we need to think more about everyone living a life of ease (or at the very least an absence of financial insecurity) before we think about individual hyper consumerism

[@TheMichelex20]

Whew you are reading the gworls for filth. Lol. Jokes aside but as a social worker and a therapist I agree with everything you said in this video. I particularly love the part where you talk about body dysmorphia and how we are creating like a luxury dysmorphia. For me luxury is freedom (reclaiming my time and taking respite) and not rampant consumerism.

[@thabangmohapeloa897]

I love how you touch on normalizing things that aren't normal, because I also used to share the same sentiments on how unattainable the "black women in luxury " movement is, then I settled into the idea. The idea which is now accompanied with black women choosing not to be strong but rather fragile, wanting to live a soft life - so these became mutually exclusive. You should want to part take in overconsumption if not you are a glorifier of struggle, there's no in between.

[@emmyems5171]

I’m sure someone has done the research on this, but I’m curious to know how the presence of KZbin has contributed to consumerism. I know we love our influencers and I know they are trying to make a living, but while watching one of my favorite KZbinrs, I couldn’t help but realize how much product she pushes. How much product influencers push in general. In some ways it feels borderline exploitative. Anyway, thank you so much Kim. Your work is always appreciated.

[@MimiMoments]

Mhmm that why so many of them are up in arms about this conversation

[@FlabbyDouglas]

I’ve been watching some luxury shopping channels lately and noticed I started feeling embarrassed about shopping at Walmart & Target. Feeling like my house is too small and wishing I had a nicer car. This video was a needed reality check.

[@thembimogala9704]

when I watch KZbinrs pushing luxury aesthetically pleasing lifestyle I do so from a point of entertainment value, I no longer wish nor desire to want to buy what they are promoting. I just go 'that's nice, she looks good' and it ends there. I don't envy and long to own what is being promoted.

[@aminatmuibi571]

I think a lot about that too. I love my favorite black KZbinrs but I’m also aware of how much these hauls of these designers items can influence me to want something I have never heard of. I definitely take more time evaluating before I buy items. Just cause I am aware of this bias. As we speak I am still 2 months into deciding if I want to buy a certain coat just because I am aware of how they brand was pushed to me by a KZbinr. 😂😂😂😂😂

[@EBONY_HD]

I think it’s important for us to remember that we made them influencers by buying the products they pushed. Now that our fav influencers have switched their niche to lifestyle content, the lifestyle is the new thing they are “selling” but not outright. This feels uncomfortable because unlike a 30 dollar foundation or 15 dollar hair product, $1500 shoes and $5000 bags are just a tad less unattainable 🙃 so now it’s a switch from “oh girl let me put you on! I got this great deal”! to “look what I can buy/ look how can live. you can’t even get it if you wanted to but since you’re here, l can show you”. Which ultimately leads to what Kimberly is talking about in the video. This slow erosion of our self-esteem, values, desires, wants, etc., via envy. Jackie Aina recently made a video about how black influencers aren’t relatable anymore and while I enjoyed the video and understood her take, I do think that the title of the video was accurate because a lot of our influencers have gone from seeming like close friends who are letting us in on good info to someone whose you know leveled up and bossed up to an aspirational level. It changes our relationship with them. To your original comment though I definitely feel like KZbin has played it’s part in good old capitalism. I just think it’s important to understand that influencers job description has always been to influence us to buy. If we don’t buy, they are no longer influential.

[@LifestylePeeper]

As a person who also indulges herself with luxury items…ALOT, I still don’t think the “black girl luxury” movement is beyond critique. If you find offense in critique and nuanced conversations about this, you may be a hit dog hollering. Thank you for your work Kimberly.

[@blackgirlburntout]

This the comment right here. I'm all for black women having luxury but just like she said in the video when it's about individual black women having luxury and not the "bettering" of all black women I have to take a critical look at it. (With my quasi luxury fossil purse on my arm 😂)

[@VictoriaWhitlock]

@@blackgirlburntout it can be bettering to some black women who need help in believing they can achieve more as a black woman

[@blackgirlburntout]

@@VictoriaWhitlock while I agree with you The point I was making is this new black woman in luxury movement does not help all black women reach luxury. So seeing that it's possible doesn't really help if it's completely unattainable.

[@VictoriaWhitlock]

@@blackgirlburntout it’s fine if it’s just inspiration. Not everything has to do everything

[@Ms.NoNo2]

@@blackgirlburntout everything isn’t for everyone. Since seeing the black women in luxury trend, I have taken starting my business more seriously.

[@Nooooooooooooooooooooo7913]

You ate this topic right on up. This whole black woman luxury movement never quite sat right with me but I could never find the language to really describe why, and you did so perfectly. It’s the inaccessibility of it all.

[@seejanetwirl969]

Listening to this after massively decluttering, shopping intentionally, crossing my legs with a cup of tea, living for a thrift store moment, embracing internal joy for real, taking naps in the middle of the day when possible all while still looking cute with peace of mind, self actualization and confidence. Thanks for all you do!❤️

[@Maki-00]

I just make my own “luxury”, which is me doing what I want to do and treating myself once in a while. I’m not rich and I’m not going to live beyond my means. I like to look and feel good and I will be “luxurious”, even if I’m in my Walmart dress! 🤣

[@CCCC-fp5gw]

Great perspective. Freedom is "luxury". Letting go of constant consumerism is freedom.

[@datBoondockingdiva]

Yes, so agree. I've fallen in love with minimalism. I would rather have less stuff/status---and qualify of life with more of time w/ financial stability. Doing part-time Van Life in my Roadtrek RV is teaching me so much about how to have less stuff & more freedom/adventure with ease.

[@kionnakelly2918]

That's is what the black girls in luxury is about though

[@marie-francoiset9402]

@@kionnakelly2918 I feel some are twisting the movement to suit their own purposes. I'm not knocking kim tho! She is def modeling how to have luxury AND still be an activist! claiming to wait for everybody to have what she has before she has it while actually having it. now thats a bomb move lololol

[@kionnakelly2918]

@@marie-francoiset9402 I agree

[@bt2598]

This might be good for folks in Atlanta to hear. There is such a big flex culture down there which can be such a turn off. Blake people will walk around the mall with empty bags to flex on people. People love having sections in clubs. But don’t have savings. A mess. Now I will admit I like designer things for myself. I also understand there is a status associated with those things that is attractive to me and probably other black women as well like you said. But I paid off my student loans, don’t have cc debt, have an emergency fund, contribute to my 401K/HSA and invest. There are always people pressuring me as to why I don’t have a car or a house and I’m not going to set myself up for financial failure just because everyone wants or thinks I should have something. It’s definitely hard but no one is paying my bills so they need to stay out my business.

[@MimiMoments]

GIRL ITS JUST AS BAD IN NYC.

[@db60615]

To be honest, this applies to any city where there's a high concentration of black people making decent money. DC, Chicago, NYC, Detroit, Houston and Dallas TX have all got it bad.

[@verlandezjones9168]

I'm just curious as to how owning a house sets you up for financial failure when having a home is one of the largest and best assets to have!!! I sure hope you aren't doing all these fiscally responsible things and yet being a renter. That makes no sense!! JS!!!

[@naya4607]

@@verlandezjones9168 a natural disaster will tear your home apart and have you fighting with insurance on a daily. Imminent domain also exists. Also what happens if you can’t sell your home? What happens if you can’t renovate your home either?

[@verlandezjones9168]

@@naya4607 These are all very poor excuses for not owning a home!!! Living in areas where eminent domain is an issue, also choosing to live in places where your home value doesn't increase are all choices!! My statement was in regard to the person commenting on how financially savvy they are, but saying that one does things like invest and save but cant find a place to own a home where home values increase shows that this person isnt as financial savvy as they are portraying! Writing things like having to deal with insurance in case of natural disasters to a home as being a deterrent from owning a home is childish!!!! If this person is as fiscally competent as they say, all the reasons you just listed for not owning a home would fall by the waistside because financially savvy people already have those things accounted for!! The reasons you listed(yes are possible) affect people who are not financially sound and the person in this post was saying otherwise. ADULTING goes a long way!! JS!!

[@Thera-Bri]

When you first started talking I was like “D.mn Kim now I can’t spend my money either” but I always sit and listen and I understand what you’re saying and I don’t think I fit the “chasing the next bag” mindset. I also would be in the “privileged” group as I too was able to comfortably leave work for 2 months for “self care”. Thanks for the talk girl!

[@nijahbrenea5380]

You encourage me to read,listen, and expand my vocabulary more so that I can articulate myself better when I feel as you feel. Sometimes I feel like a child learning to talk again when trying to dissect complexities of all the -isms. Hope this makes sense

[@cameroncapers7807]

This is really interesting. As a black man, I feel a lot of pressure to have a lot of money and take care of the women in my life. Unlearning that poverty isn't black peoples' fault helped me a lot. "Buying self-esteem" hit close to home as well. Learning to love yourself and reject capitalism is hard but necessary. Thank you for all that you do. I'm a huge fan!

[@collyflower6623]

You might like F.D. Signifier's video on Why "I Don't Dream of Labor" Doesn't Work

[@cameroncapers7807]

@@collyflower6623 I'm going to check out his page. I keep seeing his name in different videos I've watched.

[@cuntologist386]

@cameron capers if having your life together being a requirement for “secure” relationships feels like a lot of pressure… just stay single. simple. Keep on living in your mama’s house.

[@cameroncapers7807]

@@cuntologist386 Lmao I wasn't talking about romantic relationships. I also moved out of my mom's house when I was 19. Not sure what this comment was meant to convey.

[@cuntologist386]

@@cameroncapers7807 so you feel pressured provide for the women in your family?

[@avalonxoxo]

oh god i needed to hear this so badly right now. ive spent this entire pandemic broke as hell watching luxory porn online. i know this was specifically discussing black womens' experiences but this hit a SPOT for me as well. thank you for sharing.

[@MimiMoments]

Shameless plug- I made a video talking about this if you want more content about this! Kim spoke to my points more beautifully of course but I just shared my POV as a girl from The Bronx.

[@bd10232003]

@@MimiMoments I just watched your entire video. And you articulated yourself quite beautifully… and you make the same general points as Kim just did in this video. Kudos to you!

[@MimiMoments]

@@bd10232003 wow thank you!

[@abundanceofzoeys]

“I can’t tell you ‘don’t want a Birkin bag’ without first excavating the source of that desire.” I screamed, thank you for putting that into words. I don’t like when people critique “materialism” without addressing the much larger societal factors that cause it.

[@dahtcrazychiik]

This black women in luxury aesthetic isn’t anything new we’ve seen it implemented in black sitcoms with the “bougie” characters, and in pop culture I.e. Kimora Lee Simmons, Lil Kim, Foxy Brown. The issue with this narrative of black women in luxury is that’ll automatically void us of societal issues or catapult us into hypergamous relationships. Dare I say it can become a form of escapism….

[@mc2383]

A great example is Regine from the sitcom Living Single.

[@jaz01245]

loving the set design, pink couch, concrete, gold, white, yes

[@gorgeousgabbie4316]

The aesthetic‘s of it all ✨✨✨

[@Martina_E]

Yes!

[@mbali9317]

"How much of our enjoyment of expensive things is rooted in our ability to show them?" LISTEN! PUT IT ON A T-SHIRT!!! If we're going to consume or wear anything it should be merch with THIS MESSAGE. Calling us out & in all at ONCE. You did THAT with this video. HEW!

[@aminatmuibi571]

I need that one on a t shirt. I do. I really do.

[@briannerobinson7978]

I come from the idea that I like seeing black womeb as more than one dimensional beings. I like seeing black women in luxury, black women, nerdy black women, houswife black women, average black women. I agree that the luxury movement taken to the extreme does benefit the community as a whole... but I also think that sometimes, especially for black women, we need to enjoy things for ourselves without having to think if it benefits our community or not

[@sparker7768]

🎯

[@marie-francoiset9402]

your comment is BINGO!!! why is everyone so monkey see monkey do? not all black women are the same. DO YOU. And leave other people to do luxury or not as they see fit.

[@creativeone9214]

You hit the nail on the head!

[@kemisoremekun4887]

Thank you for this statement, I was so disappointed with the pathologizing of BW for doing something other every other group of women on the planet does and they don't face censure for doing so. It is the most tiresome eyerolly thing ever, especially when it comes from the community. We don't only exist in pain and suffering we also exist in joy, ease, fun and yes sometimes even in luxury.

[@rachelreii5952]

"I wasn't worried about no ysl bags I was worried about am I going to make it through it"

[@yveqeshy]

Consumption getting promoted as liberty.... The freedom to buy quickly turns into captivity via our own desires. Conspicuous consumption is the opposite of rest 😶😶, this couldn't have come at a better time

[@kbomb234]

Yes, we do need luxury but damnit we need more than that! Edit: Yeah, this is pretty much why this whole movement pisses me off. This movement focuses on improving the black woman's image within the system rather than question why the hell the system exists in the first place. I'll be the first person to say I want nice, pretty things but it seems more and more that these things come at the cost of constantly having to perform endless perfection. And I don't want it. Because I'd rather exist neutrally then having to exhaust myself trying to have luxury. Because just existing as a black woman is political statement enough these days.

[@lelele3]

"This movement focuses on improving the black women's image within system rather question why the system exists" Amazing comment 👏🏿 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿

[@shannonbaxter5360]

This really hit home. Social media really do pressure me to want things I can’t afford because everybody on social seem rich, so I start to question myself. I wasted so much money trying to live above my means just to fit this rich esthetic.

[@KoreaMojo]

Black luxury is coming from a place of asking exploited people to join in on the crime. Luxury is mental and emotional health. You can't buy that and you don't need to exploit others or participate in the subjugation of others to get that. We are so propagandized into believing that consumption is end all be all. For most of us that will mean debt and a guarantee on our labour in perpetuity. That only serves people who live off others labour and come from that background of ownership. You are right, reclaiming your time is the immediate luxury, under capitalism. You can never get a refund on that once you've spent it and we are in a place of power when we can invest it wisely. I listened to this again because I missed most of the first half. You always give me relief when covering these topics because get it in large part. You are looking beyond the slight of hand we are taught to be mesmerized by. Although we all could be comfortable enough to self actualize by doing work that is for your internal health and abilities rather than things upholding current power structures. It would take a different economic structure and a divestment from our replacement of interconnectedness and social directness with transactional socializing. We are taught to identify more with people benefiting from exploitation rather than those financially exploited like ourselves. Again this mindset keeps on the labor hamster wheel. Also it's easier to get a high off causal sex, retail therapy, gambling, workaholism, acquiring titles, and substance abuse including overeating than working on our relationships to self and others. Also currently the amount of time really rewarding activities take is a luxury you mentioned. So it's more time effective and less uncomfortable to fall into consumerism. However that keeps our interconnectedness very superficial, veiled, and we see it often as a burden rather than the wellspring for all the deepest and truest pleasures. We use consumption and materialism as a way to punk out of meetings our direct needs for acceptance, love, to be something useful in this world beyond ourselves, etc. It's less scary than emotional endeavors but it's also most propped up. Imagine how little superfluous consumption would decrease and what kinds of horrible treatment would be dismantled by people really understanding what they need and how to do the work to get and maintain it. A truly fulfilled person is not jealous of things as long as they can survive well.

[@mirakings1867]

You hit the nail on the head. I’m quitting my high paying job in a few days, to restart my life. I’ve been transitioning since the last two years to a minimalist lifestyle. Years of chasing the “bag”, accumulating stuff, all to just end up with a host of medical issues at the age of 29, woke me up. I no longer want to trade my time, well-being, and life for a “bag.”

[@VictoriaWhitlock]

Or or or black women should be allowed to share flashy and aesthetic lifestyle pics and look hot while doing it, without further thought.

[@kionnakelly2918]

This

[@marie-francoiset9402]

thank you. We don't have to justify ourselves. Even to other black women. The policing is weird.

[@KAye633]

Y’all are so…typical 😂

[@KAye633]

@@marie-francoiset9402you will never be luxurious though 😂

[@jeli1057]

My biggest problem with the black luxury movement, from the beginning, was that it’s not Black. That’s euro lux and you happen to be a racially black person. You’re in France, wearing French brands, eating French food. You’re in italy eating Italian foods, wearing Italian brands. Where is the black? Only you? Okay, sure you’re in South Africa, but staying on a euro resort. Where did all your colors go? You don’t wear purple and orange anymore? Why is everything beige? Where’s the printed textiles? Why is your hair always straight or with a soft curl? Where are the beaded jewelry and shells? Where is the distinguishing evidence of cultures?

[@Mikirono23]

Yes, I love this comment

[@myriamwilliams]

Food for thought with this comment …….

[@Femy_luna]

@Jeli..i have been doing exactly what your talking about and i didn't even realise i was doing it..thank you for this

[@kionnakelly2918]

That's not every black persons style though lol

[@josephinebournes8212]

Preach sister, preach!!!!

[@seeyoucu]

Oh...Kim came to shake the table today.

[@smoovybaby]

I was literally going to write the same comment :-)

[@quickpstuts412]

I don't have a bunch of fancy bags and expensive material possessions, but my retirement account is set and I can retire whenever I want.... and I'm in my 40s. To me, luxury is saving, living below your means, being debt free and being comfortable -- not worrying about money. THAT's luxury to me. I wish this was emphasized more.

[@blackgirlburntout]

@@PrincessYonna1 okay I can tell you have something just ruffled your feathers but you not going to come for random strangers post who said nothing about black women and insert the fact that they're talking about black women into it. She said to her luxury was being able to retire at 40 and for her (would she literally said with the words for me) That's what she considers luxury and she wishes more people saw the emphasis in this. This commenter did not say black women, this commenter did not say black women with luxury purses. What My mama has told me since I was a child is "hit dogs holler". Why you hollering sweetie?

[@quickpstuts412]

@@PrincessYonna1 Some of them do and some of them don't. I know statistically a report came out and said 80% of people live above their means. So best believe many are not saving. But it's their life. Not mine. I was just stating what I prefer to do with my life and money. I am not trying to make this about black women. White people live beyond their means too. We all value different things. No rules. Just live how you want to live. Peace.

[@quickpstuts412]

@@blackgirlburntout Thank you.

[@essencekk]

It's great to have both🤗

[@mak28busted]

There can be more than one movement since black women are not a monolith. I enjoy the positive promotion and content.

[@elegant.destiny]

This is such an important conversation. I am no where near being comfortable, but I needed to hear this now, in this moment. Thanks for the talk Kim!

[@ForeignManinaForeignLand]

My finger has this weird way of tapping notifications that come from Kim. Should get it checked out but i kinda like it this way

[@Selena-oj9mh]

I swear I see you everywhere 😂 (it's a good thing though I promise!)

[@ForeignManinaForeignLand]

@@Selena-oj9mh lol that means you got good taste

[@chelseaxoxo784]

Just a little disclaimer(especially on the comments I've seen), the black girl luxury space I follow and have been privileged to see emphasizes on building actual wealth and not on subscribing to wasteless capitalism. It Focuses on black girls getting their degrees, resting on their feminity, not entertaining the baby mama culture being pushed on AA culture and confidence from within. The whole point is living life simply, appreciating the beauty, wholely pursuing mental, emotional and physical health. That's why I'm a bit confused on why the comments are negative.

[@naya4607]

What is wasteless capitalism? because capitalism that isn’t wasteless (in general), is still problematic too. Building actual wealth is still problematic because the system doesn’t work in the way that favors everyone. Wealth, resources, free time, etc is not only inaccessible to everyone, but is also predicated on that inaccessibility. You can get that real estate property because (not only is the land stolen and acquired through genocide and exploitation) housing is a commodity, though a necessity, meant to be given to some and not to those who can’t afford it. You can buy stocks in companies that are doing well-and they’re doing well because profits, which is only possible because workers are producing more for the company than what the company pays them (aka wage theft. Aka exploitation). You can take time off or go on a destination vacation because (thank god for the labor movements) your rest isn’t *yet* a threat to those who make money off (or depend on) you. EVERYONE living simply in the ways you’ve describe requires the whole system to go.

[@marie-francoiset9402]

THIS. You are exactly right. And don't let anyone make you feel guilty for going for what inspires and motivates YOU. It's a personal choice not everyone can or wants to make.

[@MiniM69]

Because that won’t save us. Capitalism was built on our backs.

[@marie-francoiset9402]

@@MiniM69 We don't need saving. So there's that.

[@thatqueenG]

@@naya4607 but urging people not to have a little fun because we haven't reached global socialism yet is ridiculous

[@lisac5184]

Yes, that part about rest being expensive. I don't have fcuk you money AND living below my means to walk away from toxic work environments has meant limited material goods. The only way I've kept my sanity is by opting out of consuming media. Thank you for this conversation.

[@theman9048]

Minimalism has opened doors for me and gave me security as well. More people should adopt it as a philosophy.

[@Babybookieboo]

There are girls on Twitter saying that you’re bitter bc you don’t fit the “aesthetic “. So a successful black woman dressed beautifully doesn’t fit the aesthetic? Now I’m wondering what this so called aesthetic is?

[@lizziedanse8335]

Hwhite

[@sarahgivens7182]

I just stopped being the safety net this year. Now family saying I'm acting funny

[@tradealotinjj9464]

I'm Nigerian and you see a lot of this self-deciet among us too. 70 percent of Nigeria is living in abject poverty and bear in mind poverty in the us is very different from poverty in Nigeria (its worse). if you were to listen to the media and social media alone you would think we were growing as a country but all you see are the few whose parents are in politics and siphon money from the country, or the oil babies who know nothing about want. some of them will go as far as to tell you that there is no poverty in Nigeria. it's delusion.

[@missl849]

Buy the damn bag if you want it and can “afford” it. Carrying around the weight of the black experience on your shoulders isn’t all occasion wear.

[@creativeone9214]

Thank you!

[@preciouslizzie]

Thank you. I don’t know why bw think we need to Sjw’s for everything all the damn time.

[@leoniemills4918]

Thank you for articulating so well some of the thoughts I have had. Any "movement" that is based on excessive consumption and exclusivity is not liberating for Black women. Repackaging elitism but making it black is not a win for black people.

[@tartefemme08]

💯

[@kionnakelly2918]

It's not supposed to be a movement but y'all keep trying to make it out to be one.

[@PrincessScorpioMoon]

Blk women deserve the best without struggle

[@KAye633]

Who said they didnt?

[@thembimogala9704]

Kim chose her words wisely to address a subject that might be received with a push back, I respect how you deliver this message in a none accusation judgemental tone. For me, the luxury lifestyle is steeped in high-end consumerism that is unattainable for many black women. But hey each to his own, if you have money spend it anyhow you want because capitalism dictates that people must be consumers of fancy items.

[@technojunkie123]

"I refuse to spend my days consumed by my desires" Goddang. This video was like therapy I didn't know I needed, but this line really hit me hard as hell. Lately I've been so consumed with the desire to buy a house, not even a super big or fancy one, but one in area that's safe, walkable, close to nature, and near amenities that I enjoy and feel fulfill filled by - but in Houston there's really only one area like that and homes there are insanely expensive as a single young professional working on a lower than average salary (who only just recently got a full-time job after being under/un-employed for over a year). I wish it wasn't so hard to stop feeling like I'm not enough or will never make enough to do the things I want in my life & I hate how social media can make that feeling even worse even when I try to stop it from happening

[@aminatmuibi571]

I think what you are looking for is definitely a healthy asset to look for. Don’t let these perceptions fed to us on social media make you forget how you are well in your way. You are looking for an asset that gives you equity, gives you a form of investment and opens up a next stage of income for you (if you decide you want to rent out a room or something like that). You are doing amazing. You are where you need to be. Keep making conscious decisions on your choices and I promise you will get there. ☺️☺️☺️☺️

[@Kcelloo]

I see this mostly as a reaction to the fact that there aren't many black women on the pages of Vogue. It's nice to look at nice pictures, especially if the people in the pictures look like you.

[@erich7861]

Love this video! I feel like it really rings true for me too. As an asian person, a lot of our new mainstream representation, especially in america, is rooted in luxury. Crazy rich asians and Bling Empire, where its just insanely unattainable generational wealth is apparently what we're supposed to strive for. Also love what you said about how we shouldnt be chastising people for wanting these signifiers of wealth when we're in a society that places so much value on it and how they treat you if you DO have it.

[@JodyMay05]

"The movement celebrates how well you can adhere to dominant norms"-a word

[@miriamantoinettebeauty1218]

Luxury for me is a day off with my phone all the way off, pampered + self care, a nice bubble bath 🛀 , green tea && painting my nails with my favourite nail polish unbothered. I’m simple 😌💅🏿💕

[@runsonair17]

You can spend your whole life chasing this validation, if not in “luxury” things and experiences, in other capitalist or white markers of value. You can also project it on your children. So many of us were raised in households where our parents projected these same desires and insecurities onto us.

[@oiaeyu]

Come on production! Come on set design!

[@pursuitofnatural]

"If sustained rest is not available to you... why is that?" I appreciate your perspective on this, Kim. In this conversation about and pursuit of money and comfort, rest often seems even more elusive.

[@pursuitofnatural]

"If you feel like something is putting your mind or body at risk you just walk away. Most of us can't do that... women who know that it's their labor that's keeping their families or communities together." This part.

[@WitsNSass]

Very valid point about calling out this trend as an alleged "movement". A movement implies something that activates and benefits a collective group of people. You can't call something a movement when it's something quite individualistic. Plus the use of "woke" or "SJW" lingo but balking when people bring up how we can't talk about the betterment of BW without getting into political and/or socioeconomic subjects on a much higher level is some BS. It's basically trying to rebrand consumerism as something more and deeper, but getting mad when people ask to actually go deeper. Can't have it both ways. This is my favorite vlog of yours thus far! You went there, and gave facts to back up your position. Makes it harder for people to dismiss you as being a "hater". And your articulated my feelings on this in ways that I could not explain nearly as well. Bravo!!!

[@yassercastillo2607]

When you said it's not your fault I felt it, thanks.

[@olamideoladapo8496]

Amazing dialogue as always Kim! You really touched on such an important point for me as I navigate my life. My goals in terms of “luxury” are to be able to have peace and leisure that is divorces from having to make a check. When you spoke about the luxury of being unproductive for an extended period of time so you could heal really resonated with me. That’s the sort of life I’m trying to build not necessarily having the latest thing in my closet.