Eating an Edible Before a Date - Monroe Martin - Live @ the Apt

Monroe Martin remembers when he accidentally ate an edible before a date and how the night only got worse from there. (Contains strong language.)
This video is brought to you by Comedy Central in partnership with its original creator, Above Average.
Above Average release date: July 14, 2016
Subscribe to Comedy Central Stand-Up: / @standup
Watch more Comedy Central Stand-Up: / standup
Follow Comedy Central Stand-Up:
Twitter: / standup
Facebook: / standup
Instagram: / ccstandup
Watch full Comedy Central stand-up specials: www.cc.com/shows/stand-up
#StandUp .
Comedy Central Stand-Up: Anti-Bias Statement: www.cc.com/info/k32ti7/ccsu-a...

[@bigballs-lz3xj]

He sounds like TylerTheCreator with a cold

[@patrickmcdonnell489]

PickleNigga 17 naaah I mean I get where you hear it man. To me he sounds like the black TJ Miller and this dudes fuckin funny

[@robree6203]

@@patrickmcdonnell489 i heard tyler until u said this Now i cant unhear tj

[@noahpellerin196]

no he sounds like Doc Rivers PickleNigga

[@sessoments5254]

you are not funny and you need to stop trying

[@armandharris100]

He look like Bernie mac mixed wit tyler the creator

[@HiHi-yy7hd]

I feel like he’s suppressing the biggest cough known to man

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

Some flem waiting to be cleared yep

[@bruhfinns5351]

@Jesus is Dog : thats what people sound like when they hold in a cough, its a joke dumb ass

[@swoosh3684]

Had to clear my throat a few times.

[@xv06-y31]

smokers be like

[@roziebaybe1626]

@@swoosh3684 😂😂

[@poopiepantsmcgee456]

"I worry about the ones in my backyard." 😂Levels. You killed here.

[@Toosaucey1911]

PoopiePants Mcgee feel Na poosy

[@BasicallyBrosTV]

It’s true though ... take care of the kids in our country

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

Pure adulterated truth

[@shondixon6969]

That line went over everyone's head

[@thedivinebandit]

"I know you hungry, you've been waiting." 😂😂

[@rudeboymon3177]

I left my wife and son at a restaurant in Seatle because i ate a 30mg edible. I thought my wife was mad because i was looking at my ravioli funny so i freaked out and walked back to the hotel without even telling her lmao

[@linmilly9184]

Can you please tell your story in the form of a poem?

[@novasrain2126]

Lin Mill LMFAOOOOOO that’s the weirdest request I’ve seen on this app😭

[@linmilly9184]

@@novasrain2126 This ain't an app, this is the youtube comments section.

[@novasrain2126]

Lin Mill KZbin is an application on a phone. An app :p

[@linmilly9184]

@@novasrain2126 no. No. nO. NO. NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOO.

[@drgs77]

He should've ended with... Alright I'll be right back I gotta go to the bathroom.

[@jevonrodgers4599]

yeah that would have worked

[@queenelizabee7246]

Yessssssss

[@spacekatipk2175]

Naw, he should have ended with "this date just happened 20 minutes ago"

[@itsjustme6906]

And in his deep voice

[@MyZ001]

@@spacekatipk2175 Nah, he started the joke with "3 weeks ago". But, yea he could've set the joke up to begin with something like. "And she's still at the restaurant right now matter of fact" since he said he left to do a standup set... during a standup set. Missed opportunity right there.

[@IZionDawta]

“I don’t know if I could eat that much rice” 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@4TheRightJAYZUSIsAVirtueSignal]

Damn, girl. I'm not tryna be yknow but...😍🤤

[@phignewt1038]

The deep voice he put on blew my dreads off 😂

[@80d77]

If i had dreads, id 'proly brag about 'em too

[@curious17589]

I hit rewind several times, lol!

[@RabidGummyBear]

@@80d77 I'm dead asf 😂😂😂

[@phignewt1038]

Absolutely hilarious 😂

[@07ORO]

That shit made me scream out loud. I was not expecting that

[@bisikolok]

What is this? This so smooth, cool and seemlessly hilarious. I loved this guy's delivery

[@80d77]

Fr tho, i felt i saw a bit of myself in this dudes stand up

[@charlieharley7387]

Hes on podcasts alot. You should hear his episodes on the Real ass podcast. He gets super dark and dirty.

[@zugzug733]

Facts

[@pickmeup95]

U in love nigga

[@djford1999]

@@pickmeup95 lmaoo

[@mcmullen_photo]

45 minutes late, and she waited?

[@javypopskull]

Seems she was there for the free meal

[@BLURRRULB]

That's what I was thinking. Nut also she asked him out so yeah, desparate.

[@demitrisolvinski]

Exactly, that should have been the first red flag. Nobody waits that long unless they want to murder you for making them wait that long.

[@mcmullen_photo]

@Izzy Jaded Good point.

[@mcmullen_photo]

@@sabianescoo Haha!

[@mauricelangley5033]

"Flicking a penny back & forth" 😂😂

[@nothing217]

He sound like if dikembe mutuombo had a cough drop😂😂

[@chrishipop5]

Tra Trap with a Strap My shooters never missing dawg 😂

[@VisaliaMuscle]

I thought the same thing... except he had popcorn kernels in my head

[@VisaliaMuscle]

Dude said " No trailers for this D!..."

[@lenar.h2756]

😂

[@rantsandfaves]

Funniest shit I've seen in a minute.

[@Tr3ySmoov]

I kno u hungry, u been waiting😂

[@verbaloutlet6788]

Rolling

[@shanellewarner6873]

Bro I died laughing when he said that

[@blockhasher7957]

ha ha you had 555 likes and i fucked it up by liking it :)

[@nateryans6758]

Honestly if I was edible high on a date, it would not have gone as well as his did.

[@ketonesnotglucose4978]

I would have fallen asleep...

[@Ascalis1]

Forreal. Edibles are the few times that I've been "too high". Like curled in a corner whimpering level of "too high". I also ate about twice the amount I was supposed to but seriously everyone does.

[@davidpfeifer9489]

Nate Ryans Yeah, I made the mistake of taking a dab after I brought some girl home and it was terrible. 5 min blowjob and zero boner haha

[@poopiepantsmcgee456]

Im on the fence.

[@poopiepantsmcgee456]

@@davidpfeifer9489 Okay I've done that. But it was shrooms.

[@mr.nobody9697]

its like Jamie Foxx, Mike Tyson, Kendrick all boiled up with a twist of Zion Williamson.

[@kylepowpow]

holy fuck youre right

[@robertoa7357]

I was about to comment that he is the funny son of mike tyson and jamie foxx, but then i remembered that its the internet and someone already perfected the joke by the time i thought of it😂

[@diegomariacardona8273]

Gives me Tyler, the creator vibes as well

[@dylandrake5352]

Or just a black comedian. Not a collection of a bunch of random black dudes wtf

[@Dommy11]

There's some Khalil Mack in there

[@nystagmus]

Wait This is not this is not happening

[@kucam12mischablue]

nystagmus hahahahaha I’m not the only one!

[@braydenk.2384]

Same

[@arsenymakarov6961]

do you really need that stripper pole on the side of the frame to listen to a good story? )

[@patwick7351]

I saw this video about a week ago. And by "saw" i mean i didnt watch it i saw it wanted to watch it next and then i lost it. So i tried to look it up. I looked up: This is not happening eating an edible befor a date... any who i couldn't find it but i did now, cause i saw it once more...

[@A96Z86]

@@arsenymakarov6961 urm, of course you do

[@recusantbile9829]

Anyone spending a 2$bill REALLY needs that 2$bill. RNS

[@UpperCrustthe3rd]

Yep

[@goblinzeus4078]

I kept one for 8 years til I needed gas 😂

[@ruffprophetproductions]

Rns

[@adrianespinosa6490]

On some real shit

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

We need this italicized in big bold letters at every casino, currency exchange, arcade and drug store. No joke 😂

[@BearJoyner00]

"I wanna take you out this time" "I wanna treat you to something different that I know you haven't had before" *makes you pay*

[@12th.jahlil]

Which ironically would be why someone doesn’t experience something BearJoyner00

[@Respect2theFallen]

Hahahaha

[@blockhasher7957]

comedians make good money, but if you did that to me i'd have to fucking flee the restaurant, like: "..........wait.............person with a vagina...........if you can't cover this we about to steal this meal you know that right?"

[@teemaro5703]

The offer was valid for 45 minutes 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@mjg6233]

@@teemaro5703 could of left 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@mrcreate11]

Dude's hilarious but I did have to clear my throat listening to him lol

[@Chococat_Ariana]

Strong delivery from start to finish. Loved 👏 it 👏

[@elliesings9508]

Of Mice and Men strength!! Lmao!!! How have I never seen this guy before, he's hilarious

[@lolopcallulu3082]

woah that deep voice was not what I was expecting

[@weirdskyreallyweird.5519]

Man looks 19 and sounds 40 lol

[@IsmokeHiphopLive]

HE SOUNDS JUST LIKE DOC RIVERS THE L.A. CLIPPERS COACH

[@shayjshay20]

IsmokeHiphop Live THIS.

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

Doc Rivers on edibles and getting mad over a chick beast palming popcorn... naw man

[@montrelledwards9857]

Boooooooooommmmm

[@jeffreyhancock8831]

"That's birthday card Money"....damn near gave myself a seizure laughing after he said that!

[@thomaspotocki5803]

His voice adds to his story telling, I loved this set man 😂💯

[@vexon3.145]

Anyone see Jamie Foxx with glasses?

[@Rich_iam]

98 white people liked this comment. He looks nothing like Jamie Foxx lol

[@aishab6643]

no. just because he's black?

[@AlvinMcNair]

How? the forehead's different, the nose is different, the jawline is different what part of their faces is similar.

[@jasonnabors1330]

I was thinking he look like Jamie Foxx and mike Tyson

[@shannonroseboro5961]

Demarco tucker now I can’t unsee it lol

[@DutliAnvilhand]

“I’m into weird chicks” My man

[@NaturallyRandomLady]

"Gotta worry about the ones in my backyard." 🤣

[@jasongoossens]

He got african-black-guy-on-public-transport voice.

[@ednamode2334]

Jason Goossens thanks for specifying “African-black” I would’ve assumed European black

[@BrotherTayro]

Edna Mode 😭😭🤣why i think the same shit

[@bee4590]

@@ednamode2334 there are black europeans and white africans

[@sailormood_3278]

Edna Mode you sound like you don’t know black people exist outside of america, in and beyond europe... what a strange comment

[@kylea2349]

@@sailormood_3278 i think that person means that "African" was enough to make their point and "black" was unnecessary. Its not thst big a deal but i guess throwing around corrections is fun for some people yk

[@dennisinkwa5233]

He's definitely going places. Really enjoyed the set. The story sucks you in.

[@Suave_TheArtKartel]

Dammit!! If he would have had a chick walk in yell his name & walk on the stage like the date just happened and that was the comedy club he went too It would have sent me over the top ..

[@Xynteon]

That's extra but i like the idea.

[@LvJust]

i thought that was coming 2 lol

[@rorydouthard3636]

Suave I was waiting for that as well

[@danny_davis]

If I was high while watchin’ this...and THAT happened...🤯

[@Suave_TheArtKartel]

@@danny_davis Hell ya and anything goes in NYC so it def was not off the table

[@bubblerhythm]

Unlocked my Of mice and men strength 😂

[@anonymous-yt2wt]

I wonder how many pepple actually understood that one

[@shrapnel77]

@@anonymous-yt2wt if you went to high school, you should have. Pretty standard reading for 9th/10th grade.

[@Gibbypastrami]

@@shrapnel77 i didn't read it in school, my mom had a copy, read it one night the internet went out XD

[@CharronBlue]

Nut Milk 😂😂😂😂

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

I'm sorry sounds nasty!

[@honey-senpai4225]

Seeing that it was an African restaurant the “Nut Milk” is most likely something called palm wine.

[@Reecemay87]

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I knew it was the last $7 by the condition of the money!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@elbob17]

Never heard of this guy. Funny.

[@ashleywilliams9732]

Just when you think he’s gonna be the nice guy he opens his mouth. He’s funny and his delivery was great! Haha 😂

[@jessieb9384]

He was being a nice guy

[@hurtshaleagleview5322]

I always associate $2 bill with strippers cause a friend of mine once told me it's "classier" to tip them with 2s'. He (like a year later) married a stripper and had a kid then divorced her. I still never been to a strip club.

[@dammagrilla]

I always wanted to take a stack of $2's to the strip club... never got around to it tho, thanks for the reminder

[@ohyeahyeahcaptain6533]

r/thingsthatneverhappened

[@hootiehootheblowphish4109]

Hurtshal Eagleview I've heard the ATMs give out $2 bills so the gals get better tips.

[@IamTheDeathMachine]

Guess he got divorced cause he was out of $2 bills lol

[@smilingdog4067]

Pay her child support in singles now. Fuck those $2 bills!

[@M0rn1n6St4r]

He described (sans date) my 1st experience with Senegalese food, at Africa Restaurant II. Thiebou Djenne is served with a Habanero pepper. I was familiar with hot peppers, and thought it was just a flattened cherry pepper. Like I would with a cherry pepper, I popped the whole thing in my mouth. I found out why I often noticed Africans with the whites of their eyes completely red. Not bloodshot... RED! I tried washing my tongue with soap, and water. That didn't help. Turns out, salt lassi (yogurt) drinks are GREAT for countering peppers. I didn't have one of those, either. Just bissap juice.

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

Hot fiya hot fiya

[@jameswolfe2622]

He's funnier than this audience gave him credit for. Look forward to seeing him again.

[@evanmurphy8531]

Yo, KILLER SET, I was surprised to see how young you were, that came off as smoothly as a 15 year-old bit

[@Noismute]

I think part of it was

[@Cornbreadddd]

How come I haven't heard of this guy before this? Is he new on the scene? He's great, very funny, and a fun personality and stage presence.

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

Stole the words outta my mouth

[@rachelfox8108]

Awesome set! Knew it was something special when he said, "There are hungry kids in Brooklyn".

[@michaelcapps4758]

It’s amazing to feel his love for comedy in his set then hearing his favorite comedy sets at the end affirmed what I thought. I’m routing for this dude to get on SNL or something. this young comedian is so fucking funny

[@lolll3360]

Saw the thumbnail ,watched the video DID NOT EXPECT THAT VOICE 🤣loved the video

[@DD-ye9bb]

Brother looks like the lead singer of The Temptations, he even sounds like him too.

[@FUNNYMANERICWHITE]

David ruffin

[@4TheRightJAYZUSIsAVirtueSignal]

"Without David Ruffin!, y'all ain't NUFFIN!!"

[@shanellewarner6873]

This man was hilarious he had me laughing the whole time. I really hope he goes somewhere cause he is super funny.

[@ORGANICsoulJAZZ]

He looks like a nerdy Kendrick Lamar, but sounds like Ja Rule.

[@averagealoneredditor]

And looks like Jamie Foxx

[@GameMaster-sv9uw]

I don't know for me he sounds more like Biz Markie.

[@SourMech]

What are Ja Rule's thoughts on this matter?

[@Ascalis1]

@@SourMech WHERE IS JA???

[@TTMPLMKR]

OrganicSoulJazz naw, he looks like a taller Bernie Mac

[@odalysvega2190]

tyler the creator if he was raised in the east coast

[@Sam-gl6bm]

Tyler’s from Yonkers, nyc

[@jesitimpe8748]

I love his voice!! Awesome stand up!

[@jesserau616]

When he said "I worry about the ones in my backyard" made me realize something. It's who we should worry about. There are more ads about how you should donate to African kids or 3rd world countries but none about the homeless people in the USA or the older veterans who can't work because of ptsd or some other issue. the USA worries too much about other people Edit: my grammar is trash but I'm too high to correct it

[@smilingdog4067]

@@timidtyrese1460 Depends on if you want to help all of your own people.

[@Mebble]

US people really dont care too much about other people. When is the last time you saw an ad about donating to kids in africa

[@smilingdog4067]

@@Mebble I care. But where I live has been compared to "3rd world countries " I'm just trying to survive and help those around me best I can.

[@jayrose22]

Such a good delivery of jokes. I was chuckling all the way through. I am going to go look for more of his stuff now on youtube.

[@urosvesic9520]

This guy is good 😸

[@nycolesymonette4727]

I am in fuggin tears laughing 😂😂💀💀💀💀 he is funny ASF

[@Kayessee]

He did this stand-up after telling her he is going to bathroom... Did the set while she finished his popcorn... Lol.

[@demitriafallscon2732]

I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Gotta find more of this man's stand up 😆 💕

[@jettgoldberg1015]

This is like the only stand-up comedy act I’ve liked on KZbin. Not the only one I’ve liked in my HEAD, but the only one where I actually clicked the thumbs up. This dude deserves it. Hell yeah.

[@SquatSimp]

I can’t tell if the date was that interesting or it was just the way he presented it but I wish I was there to see it! 😂

[@CertifiedClapper]

I thought the title was "eating a Bible before a date" but edible is funny too

[@k1ngmackdaddy447]

@bryan diaz varela True dat

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

Won't he do it!!

[@ok5306]

All of his top specials are top notch. Elephant in the Room will forever be a classic. RIP Patrice O'Neal.

[@mirvanibrahim24]

This guy is a legend , the popcorn etiquette joke was hilarious and TRUEEE

[@MegaMatt2013]

Monroe looks like Jamie Foxx and Haha Davis mighty morphed into the super black ranger 😂

[@darrylthompson7509]

😂

[@0mnicorn]

Tell me why I keep watching comedy videos at 3am

[@12th.jahlil]

Best time to watch comedy really!! 0mnicorn

[@blockhasher7957]

sounds like something you need to figure out for yourself, i mean, there really isn't enough information about you present in this context to make an accurate assessment

[@mrshroom420]

Crystal meth?

[@LeenaStark]

He *SLAYED* from the second he walked onto that stage! BRILLIANT comic, his story-telling + delivery are SAVAGE! 🙋👏👊

[@Vinnafetish]

Hell yeah I loved it... we need more of him

[@Ucf174]

The fact that you mentioned Patrice O’Neal “elephant in the room” makes you a real one

[@CDEEZ03]

Close your eyes and hes Doc Rivers telling jokes😂

[@4TheRightJAYZUSIsAVirtueSignal]

Facts. Ashy ass voice lol. Put some aloe on them vocal chords bruh🤣

[@MrBigBawls407]

Hell yeah, man. I can't wait to see more of Monroe!

[@jennifergrams4566]

Love this! Wonderful!

[@TrentFilmss]

Him and Mike Tyson need to switch voices😂

[@Smokeyburr420]

He sounds like a young Doc Rivers lmfao

[@joelsterling3735]

Best stand-up I've seen in a long time.

[@Watcher413]

That is one the most engaging hilarious and smooth story I’ve heard in a long time

[@amberlee4536]

My man: you wanna get ice cream? Me: yeah sure! My man: ...I forgot money - Me: you planned this

[@zugzug733]

Damn this guy is funny as hell, looking forward to seeing him do great things!

[@greatestever6088]

New favorite comic! Great upload can't wait to see more

[@Jgordo1986]

I'm so happy I found this!!!

[@ivanhernandez5312]

Funniest comedian I’ve heard in a long time!!!

[@shotgunhottie]

“Come to the Angelica and see it fo’ yoself!”

[@UnwaveringBackBone]

This is how you build a real resume

[@gets187]

Damn Asia !

[@BlackShogun]

"You need ta save ya $2 bills, they may be worth more some day" lol

[@AldrickExGladius]

"I did, I just didnt specify which one I was going to" LOLOLOL

[@orejonejo]

im so much happier now. thanks monroe!

[@chrisymawere8144]

This goon knows what he's doing!! I thoroughly enjoyed this. I wish there was more of his material...

[@adamdamper3232]

Love this set!!

[@zain1132]

Yeah he’s definitely a Smoker

[@alifrahman3450]

New to the weed culture though 😂 ffs man

[@Capn_FTB]

If Dmx, tyler the creator, and zion Williamson all had the same cousin, it's him

[@kidblack6753]

Hilarious!!!! Haven't laughed this hard in a while.

[@mariosequeira642]

You need an hour special. Great set!

[@johnnyk617]

I do the paperwork lol 😂 so true

[@Tropicool]

This is great lmao

[@radtv5150]

incredible set

[@micpain8603]

Love the song at the beginning very smooth 🎶🎶🎵🎵👁️

[@lamajarmystrong91]

I did the paperwork 💀💀💀

[@PorkQPinemwale1]

It was really funny better than I expected

[@high2407]

Legend. We need more of him

[@Crookqt]

Nice list of stand ups

[@charlesdalast5604]

This is an old set, as in I’ve seen it before on KZbin, but it’s still funny.

[@SH-zn1dm]

CharlesDaLast - well the description tells you EXACTLY what it’s about. You didn’t have to watch it again. Much less make a dumb comment

[@versatilethearcane]

Dude look like a civilized Haha Davis 😂😂😂

[@BenefitsofBravery]

This is pretty hilarious! Good job 👏🏽 M.

[@noelsantacruz5282]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 He did the right thing 😂😂😂 Thanks for sharing

[@DevonnyDX]

I can guarantee you if even you're 5 minutes late to a date, I'm going to eat