How To Touch A Man In A Way That Lowers His Walls And Connects With His Heart

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Join Mat's "Mastery of Connection" course for FREE here: matshaffer.typeform.com/to/YRMRQl Here's where you can sign up for a FREE discovery call with Mat: calendly.com/matshaffer/discovery-call If you don't see a time that works for you, you can email Mat directly at [e-mail].

[@MsCorina222]

YES.TRUE.I DON T BELIEVE WE SHOULD BE AGRESSIVE IN ANY WAY

[@lorrainejoubert4904]

@@MsCorina222 m

[@agentbagreviews]

I love this message. My ex husband would push me away whenever I would try to hold him, touch him and massage him gently. He told me I was smothering him. Ultimately when we divorced, I met my loving twin, who absolutely adores me when I caress him, hold him, and he does the same to me. We both have touch as our love language and it’s magnificent!!!

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I'm so happy to hear that Julie, thanks for sharing your experience here!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

BOOM having the same primary love language is absolutely magical isnt it?! It's a non-negotiable for me in my own relationships as well :)

[@GoddessBlessYou]

@Nenethegreat W men can be extremely adept at doing and saying whatever it takes to get what they want, including putting a ring on a woman's finger. However, he is generally unable and unwilling to maintain the lies after they are not longer necessary.

[@pheabe]

My ex did exact the same thing, he would push my hands again upset that I touch him...that broke my heart many times as it is very natural for me and he was just disgusted with my touch... I couldn't understand that

[@frida4599]

Wow! This is happening to me with my partner. Thank you for sharing your experience and insights.

[@marykathleensapp6937]

💗 as a nurse we were trained the different types of touch techniques and for almost five decades of practice this has served me and my patients well. Esp in working with the elderly who as a general rule are not touched much anymore. I often would ask my patients that were hurting, scared, or stressed... "do you need a hug?" And more often than not they said yes!!

[@suzukme]

How insightful! And what a great way to ask!

[@naomistar87]

Mary Kathleen Sapp damn that made me cry sis

[@angelmagic100]

❤️💜🤗

[@nancydrollette2899]

Oh, the hugs... they ARE extremely powerful for both of us!!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Nancy Drollette yesss long sensual hugs are EVERYTHING!! :)

[@nancyreynolds1869]

Touch is Not Sex!! Touch is Talking In Silence !!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Nancy cloninger YES you got it!! 🙌✨

[@marykathleensapp6937]

🎯 Bullseye!!!

[@nehapanchal1964]

Touch is of various types, and it's very expressive Touching kids, parents, friends, a sick person, someone by mistake on the way etc, and for love or sex is all different, we all have experienced it

[@angelmagic100]

Great description!🌷

[@donnalange6927]

That's an amazing insight! I got that. Thank you.

[@jeanjoseph7905]

Touching is the language of LOVE

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thanks for sharing, Jean! 💞

[@sandyg3772]

I so needed this message! My love language is touch, but my ex (we were married 23 years) wouldn't ever touch me unless he was ready for sex. I need to be touched, to feel safe and secure. It's been 6 and a half years since he left our family and I haven't started dating yet, for fear that if I were to touch my date, he would think I want to have sex with him. I don't. Having been sexually abused most of my life, I am not interested in dating for sex. I've been in therapy, during this time, to heal from that abusive relationship. I am just now exploring the idea of trying to find a new, healthy one. This information is very helpful and stress-relieving for me. Thank you. I will be tuning in for more.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Sandy G WONDERFUL so glad this resonated with you!! Thank you for the brave and beautiful share... you are absolutely on the road to healing, freedom and the dynamic relationship you are WORTHY of ❤️❤️❤️🙌

[@kimberlywhitson2073]

Without touch for a woman sex means nothing or ever did Randall Bennett,u were supposed to excite me so I could go all crazy on you.But all u cared about was you.Thats why I never wanted to share sexual stuff with you because you didn’t share,u shared nothing with me.Sorry our 18 years are shot to hell.

[@susanbennett9293]

Sandy G my exhusband was so tactile defensive and only associated touch with sex. I'm dating a new guy that loves to be touched and loves to touch me. Its so healthy. You'll find that special person one day!!♥️

[@hopefull752]

God bless. Pray the Lord Jesus Heal you. AMEN.

[@waiyinsun]

it works the other way round too; women also have the need to be held, touched and confirmation

[@Mat_Shaffer]

waiyinsun YES absolutely! All of this gets to be reciprocal 100%

[@blackrain9946]

@@Mat_Shaffer you don't say...

[@Mat_Shaffer]

black rain mmhm! 🤗🤗❤️

[@Pomoscorzo]

Totally agree. We often work too, and at the end of a hard day it's nice to come home and feel comfortable.

[@EsterMaupa]

Thank you women may have not gone to work but they labored around the house chores, kids, grocery &bills so they surely could use a long reassuring hug....

[@beauti2thecore]

Wow I’ve been thinking wrong all along. I thought men didn’t like affection and touch like that. Wow now I understand. Thank you!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Lady Virtue so glad it resonated with you 🤗🤗

[@hellotherealien]

I thought that too. I also thought bcs my parents rarely ever touched me - or rarely, talked to me - that parents didn't like touch or need it. Weird, how all this is reciprocal for every one. And, how we all just don't say we need to be touched.

[@susanr3933]

I think eye contact is a great form of touch!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

totally agree!!

[@dharkknightshade898]

I just imagined two people pressing their eye balls together.

[@sharonphillips5282]

This explains why he asked me to married him within 2 weeks. I touched him on day 2! We’ve been happily married 3 years.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Sharon Phillips BOOM amazing!! Sounds like you have the magic touch 🤗🤗❤️❤️🙏✨

[@Liberty874]

Magic indeed! I touch my guy and envision my vibration emitting into him.

[@angelsaaya]

Wow

[@RedQueen0394]

@@Mat_Shaffer ..p But ct by

[@seattlered3018]

I love it when a man is affectionate and demonstrative with me when he is like this, I can't help but touch him! 🥰 I especially love to put my hand on his when sitting together or stroke his face when we embrace.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Seattle Red those are all great spots!

[@caroh2809]

Seattle Red ooooo yes. I’m the same. If we sit together I always slip my arm through his and rest it along his leg.... 🥰

[@PeaceDayCortez]

Your first blink and smile when this video started is all we need to know as women. Perhaps you should be teaching men what women want 😘🌹

[@elainebmack]

I met someone a year ago. Without even realizing it, the first thing I did was lay my hand on his shoulder. He responded by standing up and taking my hands in his. Pure magic. Two days later I saw him at an event. He briefly sat near me, and I had to restrain myself from touching his legs below the knee. I saw him again some months later, and this time he gave me a huge, warm hug. I can't wait to see him again!

[@tinkershell1856]

So good! Touch is not my primary love language, but it is the one of a guy I’ve been seeing. Growing up, touch was considered sexual and that was considered wrong. I didn’t consider any of these, yet he touches me in these ways. Time to reciprocate ❤️ thank you!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Shelley C YES that’s beautiful, so happy to hear about your shift! He will absolutely appreciate it 🤗🤗❤️

[@goddessravenlovelife7452]

Dawnie Boo i understand i have sexual abusers in my family don’t let them have power over you still . The power is making a choice to let go and be able to process and move forward. It’s a hard road much love and light to you xo💜

[@Oshuin9]

I am a clair sentient, so touching in any capacity is intense for me, because I can feel the energy along with the physical touch. All wall comes down through my eyes and smile, which is safe and healing for both of us. From there, I can sense where touching is apporporiate. Most of the time, it is around the neck, shoulders and the heart space in the back. Finding thr right spot is explosive and fun! Great video by the way. Have fun y'all.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Oshun amazing yes the GAZE has so much power to connect and lower walls, and when you combine it with tough you can melt him into a puddle ❤️🤗

[@luciem5372]

LOVE THIS I dated a guy who asked me once not to stroke his arm. Thats when I knew it was over.

[@dreamycalm]

Lucie M lmao wth

[@thebluebutterfly5177]

Love that silver tree on your wall

[@Mat_Shaffer]

The Blue Butterfly thanks it’s my tree of life :)

[@veronikachensky9439]

@@Mat_Shaffer Great video, thank you! I do like your tree too. its very special. Where did you get it from? ( If its ok to ask)

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Veronika Chensky it was from amazon or Etsy, it’s from Romania! Totally worth the wait to get it... there are more if you search for the tree of life on there :)

[@TheSupaTeaPodcastShow]

Tree of life

[@laken1804]

Tree of wisdom. I was thinking that I'd like a pendant like that when I read your comment.

[@nehapanchal1964]

Hey Matt, that's a lovely video you made, I am from India and like someone said, we were restricted from anything sensual or sexual touch or seeing or feelings , any information, it was forbidden. India is the land of kamasutra, yet nothing talking about such things and as soon as you are married you should know everything. I'd like to share my experience. Men are always the superior one taking charge, my man has certain fixes in his head that yes this is how women like things, like a formula or a written format or a set of rules. Touch is such a lovely language which he didn't seem to understand till now, he was like you want something just say so. He after 20 years doesn't know how and what kind of touch I like, such a tragedy for me. Matt you have a lovely smile and your occasional shyness is so pretty, be like that always....

[@Mat_Shaffer]

thanks so much for this share and your kind words my dear! it sounds like its time for you to teach this man how to speak the language of touch with you... what more would you like me to explain around touch? What more questions do you have?

[@nehapanchal1964]

@@Mat_Shaffer almost given up on trying to, it's been a really long journey with him, now may be teaching won't work, thanks for for the lovely words

[@nehapanchal1964]

@Saad Bin Masud what exactly do you want to convey or ask

[@lifewithsuzzyq2039]

Wow!! This Is going coming from a man. Never too old to learn. .

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Suzzy Q 🤗🤗🤗 it’s the truth! So glad it resonated with you... let me know if you have any other questions on this stuff 🙏

[@sun_rose123]

I was in a long-term relationship with a man, who wouldn't touch unless he wanted sex. And my number one love language in a relationship is touch. And I was frustrated that he didn't want to touch me.

[@JessicaFayToday]

Sometimes, we do too much out of nervousness and thinking that just hanging with us is not enough to make a man happy. Provocative touch helps divert the attention off of us and our insecurity. Makes us the aggressor. Puts us more in control of the situation.

[@rhondabaldwin7529]

Touch will Establish and Reinforce "trust and safety", yes Men need this

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thanks for sharing, Rhonda! 💞

[@nancyreynolds1869]

Hold Hands,put your hand on his shoulder,touch his face,Caress his arm,lips,neck,,Yes Hugs, Touch his back when you are out together,..Number 1 Kiss his forehead and walk away,

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Nancy cloninger ohhh yah that last one is a powerful move 😍😍🔥💥

[@dextroseivy3460]

The last one is great. But I will need to step stool

[@NWAdventureGal09]

@MatSchaffer I'd heard a is Kiss n the forehead felt like "mom" not girlfriend, wife or love interest. What's your thought on this?

[@nancyreynolds1869]

NWAdventureGal09 it brings passion, awakening, touch is powerful and so much more, just different kinds of touch means so much, try it!!

[@saradyer9124]

Brilliant. Thank you. I'm 61 and have just met a beautiful man. I never learned the nuances of intimacy and was shy in the past. This is a very powerful lesson for me. I am a very physical person myself, but was inhibited in case I was giving the wrong signal or being too forward. I can't thank you enough. Sara 🌺

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Sara Dyer beautiful share!!! Congrats on finding such a wonderful partner and opening up to him :) what else would you like to hear me explore around connecting with men? Would love to support you!

[@hellotherealien]

10:28 ...touch does not have to be sexual... {*My side note: yay, bcs if u've had really bad experiences with rejection from parents by not being touched at all growing up or traumatic touching like assault, then, "touching can be really hard for you" to "retrain" yourself to "accept" touch or "know" that it is "all right" to be "*touched.*" **❤️💋🤗: Please seek help for Touch, Traumatic reasons. I did and still do and it helped me, alot.** Much lightlove namaste ✨🦄✨👍}

[@Mat_Shaffer]

The Moms view - lol StarDustEnergy thanks for this share, I love it! Such healing is possible if we reframe our relationship with touch 🙏🙏❤️❤️✨✨

[@lakebafondren5868]

Experiment exactly. Sometimes enjoying someone’s touch depends on who that person is. With one person it might be intriguing while with another person it’s revolting.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

LaKeba Fondren YES touch is a very subjective language 🤗🤗❤️❤️🙌

[@TenYah144]

Yes physical touch is truly my love language. Not just to men but almost everyone. I'm very touchy lol. But thanks this was very helpful

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Tenya Blackwell great so glad it resonated with you 🤗🤗

[@caroh2809]

Tenya Blackwell Urghh me too. Luckily I found someone who responds well to being touched. In fact now he’s the one reaching for my hand, or putting his hand on my knee or hugging me from behind which I just love. I would be stuck to him like a limpet given half a chance !

[@KingdomLife]

I'm so touchy feely!

[@genevalivingstone1929]

I touch his chest when we're talking. The first time I did this he tensed up then he relaxed into my hand!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Geneva Livingstone he melted for you! 🤗🤗❤️❤️

[@vivienrhodes4248]

Yes spot on The first thing we do with babies is gently talk to them soothingly and touch gently and tenderly same for adults That's why babies often cry when they hear tough deep voices signal is danger I am unhappy and let everyone know Its easier to grasp that then explore Ask questions

[@maybeitsree1942]

Hi Helena!! I’m just checking in, my love is still going strong with the man of my dreams. We have had a few bumps, but it has actually brought us closer. Thanks again for your relationship advice ❤️🥰

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Sheri McCray that’s so sweet!!

[@maybeitsree1942]

Mat Shaffer I’ll be using your tips this weekend 😂😂🤔

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I’m so happy to hear that, Sheri! ❤️

[@onm9128]

Just getting to read this, Sheri. Which of Helena's advice had worked the best for you. I ask cos I feel I've met the man of my dreams too (going about 1month now), & don't wanna mess this one up. He is a super alpha masculine. 'hope to hear from you

[@ZenJenX]

Thank you for addressing touch as a trigger I’ve never heard this brought up before. It helped me a lot.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

J W YES touch can be a big trigger for men, esp those with trauma in their past . It provides a powerful healing opportunity if you’re willing to “go there” and ask powerful questions of your partner ❤️❤️

[@Hellnogizmo]

This is great! Stumbled upon this at total random, but amazing advice, especially for a touchy/feely person like myself. 😉

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Hellnogizmo aww so glad it resonated :)

[@apstockley]

Agh. I needed this two weeks ago. Lesson learned. I feel like I blew a valid opportunity last week because I had not watched this yet. 🤦🏼‍♀️ Upset with myself.

[@olivialegree9774]

april lol. 😂

[@Mat_Shaffer]

april maybe there’s a second chance ???

[@apstockley]

Matt.., definitely will be a second chance! I will certainly use that opportunity next time!! Thank you for this video and all your insights!

[@LynnMcAllister]

I like these tips on how to flirt and show my man some love. Thank you, it helps because these are not things discussed amongst friends. It’s nice hearing advice from a man too.

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I’m glad this was helpful, Lynn! 💙

[@smiley27b]

This is great info! I'm naturally touchy feely so this is very validating 🙂

[@Mat_Shaffer]

smiley27b fantastic that’s great to hear 🤗🤗🤗

[@reesegetwellchannelgully8132]

I agree that man’s love language is TOUCH ...i almost feel mostly love from my boyfriend through his touch . Lucky for him...I cant ever keep my hands off him...hahahaha

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Reese Gully well sounds like you both have something to be grateful for!! 🤗🤗❤️ what’s his favorite way to be touched?

[@reesegetwellchannelgully8132]

Mat Shaffer i cant believe you replied ...hahaha ..thanks :-)

[@reesegetwellchannelgully8132]

Mat Shaffer i give him a scalp massage and he returns the favor always ...and then foot massage ..very awesome

[@MaleficentHipster]

I get overstimulated and annoyed by touch very quickly but I know my boyfriend's language is touch so I remind myself it's loving. It’s funny because I always worry that I annoy him when I touch him a lot (because I would be annoyed) but he loves it.

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Thanks for sharing your experience here! 💞

[@MsCorina222]

IT SHOULD BE A LOT OF RESPEKT AND KINDNESS ON BOTH SIDES

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Corina Domocos totally agree!!

[@mustardseed3624]

Your very good at explaining things.I bet you really help a lot of people.

[@Banana-lk7tf]

My favourite way to please a man is to pet him, play with his hair and massage his back, neck and shoulders. It really bums me out when a man doesn't like to receive that, because I love doing that so much!:(

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Perfect Storm and remember when a man is resistant to that it might not be that he doesn’t like it, it may just be that he’s got trauma around it. That’s when using gentle loving questions and lovingly holding space for him can be really healing!

[@lovelyshay777]

Me2

[@NWAdventureGal09]

@MatSchaffer how does one emotionally hold space for one's loved one?

[@merladyneptune3908]

Great Tips! We need more men like Mat on Earth... Keep the good stuff coming!

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I'm glad you enjoyed this! Here's the last livestream I did with Mat if you haven't seen it yet: kzbin.info/www/bejne/pavRZoaAgdpoobs

[@anavidhya]

Hey Matt, just wanna say that was a great video! You have a wonderful way to explain stuff and talk, like we can really feel and realize what you are saying. So far your videos at Helena’s are my fav, already add them to my fav list. I remember that once i was reading an article about what men really crave in a relationship and there was more than 50 perspectives and opinions of different men, surprisingly 98% of them said: touching, having my back being rubbed or scratched, specially the back of my head and neck, they’ve missed these things more than any other physical thing or stuff.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Ana Miranda THANK YOU for this amazing feedback!! Yes touch is really a magic way to connect with the masculine :) what else would you like to hear me speak into?

[@hunny585]

omggg thanks for sharinggg

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Hina B. I know right?! Love it!!

[@maureengannaway8635]

This is so true. My ex loved when I massaged his scalp. I think I have a career in massage therapy. I do it to family members shoulders massages because my family is dysfunctional, stressed and we are holding in yrs of pain.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Maureen Gannaway so good!! touch is the universal language and a powerful tool to release trauma 🤗🤗

[@Danger_Bunnyyy]

the power of healing touch! 😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

gH0ST__ g1RL it’s truly magic !

[@jayhulrs1435]

This is really helpful, I'm going to make a conscious effort to do this

[@Mat_Shaffer]

YES let us know how it goes in your relationships!! Would love to hear :)

[@elenanguyen4928]

Thank Mat. This helps me a lot cuz I didn't recognize that he needed that physical touch from me when we hung out till watching your video.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Elena Nguyen amazing so glad this resonated with you!! Let us know how it works for you!

[@kristilee7644]

Hi Mat! Thank you for your video. I have to admit that you are so on point! I have done this with my true love and you are absolutely right. Touch is very powerful and I just loved your video. thanks again and I look forward to learning more about you and from you!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Kristi Lee aw thank you SO MUCH your kind words warm my heart! What would you like me to speak into more? I am always looking for more topics to explore 🤗

[@amyanderson4123]

I think massage is a very healing thing.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Amy 75206 it’s a powerful practice to build connection and intimacy!

[@dbedazzling1]

I will marry him if he massages me lol

[@pretty2ization]

My first time watching and i do love this. Thank you soo much for sharing this.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

yvonne verla so welcome and glad you enjoyed it! What else would you like me to speak into? :)

[@pmymode]

“Men crave physical validation... A little physical validation goes a long way .”

[@Mat_Shaffer]

pmymode EXACTLY!!

[@cherahsBroll]

Wow, this is awesome. Thank you, I needed to hear this.

[@RaquellMenezes]

I feel soooo blessed by you and this video. I needed that! Thank you. Much love from Brazil 😘

[@Mat_Shaffer]

[@seventhivy878]

Yes!! I concur. The specific examples of how to incorporate small, subtle but powerful touches were extremely helpful 😇💖👍🏾💖

[@RaquellMenezes]

@@Mat_Shaffer It did Mat!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

1BLKQEN YES men deeply appreciate that subtle playful touch, it evokes them and invites them to relax and step in deeply 🤗🤗❤️❤️

[@MsCorina222]

MANY MENS WERE SEXUALLY ABUSED ALSO.SO IS TRUE THAT WE SHOULD UNDERSTAND EVERYBODY NEEDS HEALING

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Corina Domocos YES we all have wounds and can heal them for each other ❤️❤️

[@deed1801]

Yes, men love the hair, back of neck. This content was thorough and well explained! Thanks Matt 😊

[@Mat_Shaffer]

YES thank you Dee D! It truly is the greatest way to hypnotize a man and drop him out of his head and into his heart/body

[@dayondastribling5080]

Oh my! THIS is INVALUABLE! Thank you!!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Dayonda Stribling 🙏🙏🙌✨ you’re so welcome! ❤️❤️

[@TonettaClay]

I love this video about touch. I'm one that is now learning to be more affectionate towards my partner. This is helpful for me to know I'm on the right track

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I'm glad you enjoyed this, Tonetta!

[@undercoverhamster2549]

Thank you so much. I'm not a naturally tactile person so this video has helped me to get ideas on how to break through my own barriers!

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I'm glad this was helpful for you!

[@brieze1233]

Groin thing has kept me ..about men and sensitivity..as naive as I may seem and always applying stereotype approach when connecting with men..so thank you

[@marjorieyoung4071]

Thank you for your message. It was a powerful one. Love your dimples. Being an older woman with a younger guy, touch is important, I have found. 🎶🎶

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Marjorie Young aw thanks 🤗 yeah touch is very importAnt especially with us younger guys haha...where’s his favorite spot?

[@marjorieyoung4071]

@@Mat_Shaffer my man loves for me to hold his face, look him in the eyes. Tell him how much I love him. ❤️❤️❤️. I can touch anywhere and he responds.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Marjorie Young beautiful i love it!!

[@julie-annemorgan9113]

Reaching out makes me feel vulnerable and feeling like I could be rejected as it’s been so long I’ve felt there has been real intimacy between us. I will try though...

[@Liberty874]

I always envision my love vibration emitting into MY GUY through my touch; he loves it and melts into me like butter. We are equally yoked in that respect because when he touch me, I instantly let him know, through my touch, that I like that. It's like an odd touch conversation. Lmbo But I love it.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Growthseeker 777 WOW such a beautiful visualization! Sounds tantric and profound 🙏🙏🙌✨

[@Liberty874]

Tantric, indeed! It's almost unworldly...but thk you for your kind observation.

[@marty5432]

A-maaa-zing! So true. Be a toucher. It works. Great presentation!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Marty Kadrofske 🙏🙏🤗 appreciate it Marty! So glad it resonated - what else would you like to hear me explore?

[@marty5432]

@@Mat_Shaffer thank you! There is so much to know and learn and this was such an important message. Ppl light up when one simply shares a smile with a stranger. Touch but don't grab for the "goodies" was perfect . More on how to keep the other interested would be especially helpful with proper boundaries in mind.

[@lelletaffyn7706]

thank you Mat - I really liked this video - it really helped me with knowing more about what men would like or love - so often I realise that men are a mystery to me - thanks again

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Lelle Taffyn THANK YOU I’m so glad!! We may be mysterious haha but we aren’t complicated :)

[@yuliabradley139]

Such a warm video, thank you.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Yulia Bradley 🙏🙏❤️❤️ that’s my so much ✨✨✨

[@wearyandheavyladen23]

This is incredibly helpful. Thank you! 🙏🏼

[@rebeccabalonso8132]

Tnx a lot for the great information. I know that touch s a show of affection. But didn’t know how to show it in a subtle way.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Rebecca Balonso well now you do! :)

[@rebeccabalonso8132]

Mat Shaffer Yeah, Mat. Tnx to u...a lot. I’m really glad I’ve viewed (quite accidentally), ur way of relating s...detailed and ur topics enlightened me. Again thank u so much.

[@antoinettefernandes8133]

Rubbing his chest softly when watching a movie.... or his leg .... a hug from behind when his making something in the kitchen ..

[@AndreaReid-bl9ns]

When we touch one we convey our true feelungs when we bring his walls down we help him toexplode in the right way leaving him feeling relaxed in one's arms

[@rosaliegonzalez2550]

I enjoyed this video. Much needed, thanks

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I'm glad you enjoyed this!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

So glad Rosalie!

[@nancymc]

Love your tree of life. Thank you for the touch advice

[@Mat_Shaffer]

so welcome! :)

[@cherylgood934]

I really like this one because for once I'm doing something for a man that's not making him chase me making him love me making him do this that or the other because we can't do that we're not that powerful but it's meeting him Ana level where he needs to feel accepted and treasured and loved and that's a way we can do that and it's honest that's what I liked most about this thank you so much

[@MsCorina222]

YOU ARE SO KIND.SO GRATEFULL

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Corina Domocos thanks so much my dear! 🤗

[@ninarotari5971]

Looooove this approach, touch can be very healing indeed

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Nina Doina Rotari yes it truly can!! 🤗🤗❤️❤️

[@lyndaniels5464]

I really learned a lot from this video! I just started dating a guy who is extremely physically affectionate & I'm the exact opposite. I'm more on the shy/uncomfortable side when it comes to touching & being touched & I never initiate so I've been "researching" how to be affectionate lol. Good video! Very knowledgeable man. Is it weird though to say that I'm dying to know what happened after the girl shocked him with the crotch grab? Lol

[@AM-yj5jx]

I love that language. You know? It's two way road. If man touch more than initiate sex. Also often I just want to touch, show warmth, but for him is an invitation. I love sex, but sometimes I want only a touch.

[@LinYouToo]

How about a video on getting used to touch when you have PTSD and CPTSD? How do you learn to not flinch when touched? Especially when you’re not expecting it/don’t see touch coming?

[@Mat_Shaffer]

LinYouToo that’s a wonderful idea for a follow up video!! I am working on it now!

[@HeyMaryMitchell]

You should try massage therapy. They are professionally trained. We can go over the clothing. You are in control. I’ve worked with rape survivors with PTSD. I myself am a survivor of domestic abuse. I was recommended massage therapy by my Psychotherapist and it helped so much I went to school for it! Now I’m a massage therapist and love helping others. Pick a therapist you can see on a regular basis in a space that is comfortable to you. You can take baby steps. Good luck and bless you. 💕

[@wandakuhnwilton7278]

I too am a survivor of domestic violence. There are times that touch does affect me negatively. Please do consider a video about this topic. Thank you so very much.

[@LinYouToo]

Mat Shaffer Thank you. Let me know where to find the video once it’s complete, whether on this channel or yours. Looking forward to your perspective.

[@LinYouToo]

Mary Mitchell 🙏 thank you.

[@Mira20153]

"She went straight to the bread basket" - omg!! I can't!! 😂😂😂 Thank you for all the tips!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Mira2015 HAHA glad you appreciated that! You gotta be real in these videos ;)

[@wendycain7225]

Mat Shaffer. Great video, also hilarious! 😂Poor bread basket, violated 😁

[@olivialegree9774]

Mira2015 I’m like oh shit! Breadsticks!!! Bread basket 🧺

[@olivialegree9774]

Wendy Cain Photography the big bad wolf😂😂😂

[@alexthebullo]

A French baguette bread,,though.

[@deborahocampo852]

Those eyes ..great video

[@cindycinn2724]

I love to touch...makes everything more real to me no dream while I'm awake..touch is playful

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Cindy Cin YES touch is a beautiful way to play... I like that a lot, may explore it in my next touch video 🤗🤗❤️

[@cindycinn2724]

@@Mat_Shaffer please do😀

[@nessav7258]

Hi Mat, that was a really good quick lesson on touch. I have already performed some of the examples prior to reading this and vouch for their effectiveness.

[@rhondadortch4145]

True men do have spots that you touch on him and it will excite him and didnt know that spot was , ONE OF THE SPOTS HE DIDNT KNOW HE HAD

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Rhonda Dortch isn’t that great?! You awakened him to an entirely new pleasure center!! Wanna tell us what it was? ;)

[@sabrinanascimento5248]

My DM and Twin and me are still in Separation, yea but we are in Separation and we are in different countries. Touch, great job. Yea but we are in Separation. Squeeze his hand. Trust and safety. Hug, hold him, pet him surrender. Hold him, cuddle him, intimacy. Be my protector. Boundaries kissing.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Sabrina Nascimento poetic and beautiful 🙏❤️✨

[@Saffronikka]

Question: How do you communicate, skillfully, to a man about a way in which you do not like to be touched? I feel like I could definitely improve in this area which helps me trust myself more & feel safer. For example: I only enjoy "wet" kisses on my body when we are being super intimate in a sexual way - I do not like it at all when it's randomly done in the middle of the day or I'm just washing dishes, etc. For those times, I prefer "dry" kisses. I tried my best to politely talk about it but he got really upset & refused to touch me at all or be intimate with me. I know this man was not healthy for me (we are broken up now), but I still want to improve my communication skills in this area. I easily bruise egos but don't mean to nor want to🤷🏻‍♀️

[@AndreaReid-bl9ns]

I don't think the person was compatible to your needs when one looks for a partner it is important that you have similar desires for any friendship to develop always remember that in any relationship one has to build a bond of trust between two people what I would say about yourself I think you have to do some work on yourself start by loving yourself when a realashio so reaches sexual afair you need to start relaxing more leave the dishes and show more love towards your dear one or you will have partners running away relax more and you will be more successfully within a relationship

[@attiliadin]

Mat, you are so clever...thank you!

[@mpdaugherty8549]

Thank you. I love to do that for my husband. It’s easy how much we neglect to keep up.... relaxed stage. I’m going to work even harder because I love my husband so much. I couldn’t imagine to not be there for my best friend.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

M Pdaugherty YES love this beautiful intention 🙏🙏 your husband will SO appreciate it ❤️❤️✨

[@peacelove7398]

Great video, thank you Mat and Helena!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

So glad you enjoyed it 🙏🙏❤️❤️

[@lavonnibjur]

Wow this was a real eye opener! Thank you!!

[@Mat_Shaffer]

L Montemayor beautiful so glad it landed with you! What was most surprising to you?

[@msm632]

Thanks for all the good advice! Great video!!! Keep them coming, ❤️❤️❤️!!!

[@nadatofi1788]

Another great video Matt 😊keep up the good work

[@Mat_Shaffer]

thanks my dear! Glad you enjoyed it :)

[@sunshinexoxo4984]

This is an amazing video!!

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[@helenellsworth9556]

My partner melts when I touch him, I gently glide my fingers around his arms that im in, he says I have magic fingers😊

[@HelenaHartCoaching]

Awesome, thanks for sharing Helen! 💞

[@helenellsworth9556]

@@HelenaHartCoaching no worries

[@marciamellow1211]

Such a great reminder...completely fabulous information... works.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Marcia mellow 🙏🙏✨ wonderful so glad it resonated!

[@vanessagarcia6326]

That's not wild I've always been a woman who has touched my boyfriend. One of my ex's used to love it when I rubbed his hair. He loved it when I put my head on his chest and my arm over his stomach. I would always make it purpose to touch him or wait for him by the door to kiss him as soon as the he opened the door. He loved it.

[@Mat_Shaffer]

Vanessa Garcia YES you really had his love languages dialed in didn’t you?! That’s fantastic!! Great strategies 🤗🤗🤗

[@keekeedavis3521]

Soo, just curious why y’all aren’t together still then

[@desisacris]

KeeKee Davis same!

[@goddessfreya13]

Love this! Thank you. I love to be touched as well.

[@kimgordon3695]

These tips are so freeing! 💜Thx Mat

[@kimgordon3695]

& or course Lady Helena💓

[@sexyladyakb]

Ugh I’m so touchy feely wish I could have someone that appreciated this

[@Mat_Shaffer]

you absolutely CAN!!!

[@FriskyTendervittles]

The bread basket I’m dying 🤣🤣🤣

[@cannons2daleftofthem253]

I love your smile!!! Its higher on the right. My new baby smiles like that. 😏

[@Mat_Shaffer]

AW haha is it really?! That's great, glad you like it :)

[@Mat_Shaffer]

C C a smirky baby! That’s too cute!

[@mariehalsey8892]

@@Mat_Shaffer I really like your eyes beautiful color nice addition to your face 😊

[@saxonjw]

🤣🤣🥖🥖🥐🍞 basket. I must say that was a good one

[@deborahlord2355]

Great! So want to, but my husband of 30 years and father of our 10 children, this year said “Don’t touch me, hug, or kiss me.” We are in our 50s.

[@AngellaPrinz]

Deborah Lord That sounds heartbreaking. I hope he talks about it and gets help from someone. You deserve more and he also deserves happiness. I hope you both get there.