I Regret Watching My First Videos...

Hello Everyone! As you have read by the title I recently made the regrettable mistake of watching my first videos...Doing so, I did make breif comments on how my experiences with schizophrenia differ from then and now. I hope you all don't cringe as much as I did. The cringe was so bad I debated on deleting my channel. However, unfortunately I did not. Enjoy! :)
My Instagram: www.instagram....
My Official Discord Server: / discord
Love You All! ❤

[@tayzonday]

Eh, I think I watched them when you made them. That’s when I subscribed!

[@scjay]

fireass musicman

[@TruthSeekers1989]

Man I just gotta say the fact at that age you had the courage to start a youtube channel and talk about your illness is awesome as someone else said you gotta start somewhere, you seem like a good person I wish you the best brother

[@DubD615hduw]

Most 15yr old's are like this, there is nothing wrong with the orientation of that video aside from his condition....

[@TheDustypoptart]

Hi Buddy, I don’t think your first videos are in any way embarrassing or bad. I hope you’re better. Stay strong.

[@chrissy24-7]

I would say, be kind to your younger self. It's very kind to want to let others know about an illness that can be so scary. It's beautiful that you wanted to reach out to people and educate about what it's like. You're breaking stereotypes, and i applaud you! ❤

[@Tatiebabyy]

Is it just me or do i feel like he is now like his dad watching his son...?

[@juliel9749]

i find you pretty cute and authentic in these videos. 💙Nothing to be embarrassed of! I remember seeing your videos at the time as well. you were soo brave at that age, to create a channel for schiz. (and even video games)! I'm so proud of that mini you 5 years ago and still today. you rock

[@jenniferchase4085]

Bro I just wanted to seriously say thank you for posting all these ... I found ur vids when my schizophrenic sister was having a very very bad time, and I just did not know how to deal with it and you were LITERALLY the only person on KZbin talking about schizophrenia. Thank you, I can't even tell you... Just sitting in my room at 3 am sobbing bc my sister is screaming that there are armed militia men in the yard with weapons trained on us..... And I was searching and searching for just.. what do I do what is happening how can I help her, and you were THE ONLY channel dedicated to this illness. Thank you thank you thank you God love you you seems soooo much better now, Good on u for taking ur meds, my sister will not. I've tried to show her your channel just bc you both have the same illness and she has no one, she always feels alone, no one understands.... THANK YOU. I will keep after her til she subscribes 😂lol Ps can u talk some more about your more severe symptoms and have you ever been in denial about your illness? And if so, what happened to make you .... Realize? PS... Cut yourself some slack bruh ur a literal baby here ❤

[@jenniferchase4085]

PS def Leppard rocks! Hahaha

[@danielledray5689]

Stop picking yourself apart. I subscribed after seeing your earlier videos. I appreciate you doing these videos so much

[@tayler2396]

I just stumbled onto your channel and have been watching in chronological order, starting with your oldest video. Among my first thoughts: what a fun, smart, brave kid! Please don't delete those. I suspect your early videos helped other teenage kids, both with and without schizophrenia. Be proud of your young self is what I'm saying.

[@Candy2Sunflower]

alrighty there u go completed mission impossible from ur to-do list. p.s.: giggles and laughing at yourself was the BEST PART!!!

[@Candy2Sunflower]

in everything you do i love you

[@untitledsong7963]

"welcome to my first channel on this video" - said he very confidently

[@jasmineb8576]

Interesting to see your growth. Thanks for this fun video.

[@TDMIdaho]

You got to be kinder on yourself, your videos are totally normal, and I think you will look back at you, making fun of yourself someday, and regret that more. Also, it’s important that other kids feel like they can be normal on camera without feeling like everyone is judging them.

[@tarottime3219]

Your videos are priceless dear, your helping a lot of people who suffer with this illness.

[@xxdustinadamsxx]

I just happened across a couple of your videos from a while back. My ex-mother-in-law and my brother-in-law's brother had schizophrenia, so it's something I dealt with quite often. I can't imagine what it's like to have something like that. I once couldn't sleep for over 48 hours and started hearing things and seeing things and was extremely paranoid that someone was in my apartment (I was alone). I don't ever want to experience that again. You deal with this every day, well, I'm sure you don't have episodes every day, but you still live with it every day. I feel for you. You were very courageous to do this at such a young age and I'm sure you helped other people just by talking about your experiences. 🙏

[@benjaminpaige1067]

bro dont ever be ashamed of your existence keep going no matter what you existing right now shows insurmountable strength dont ever disrespekt yourself by judging yourself or being embarrased of yourself dont give up no matter what

[@KapuAdam]

The remark from that first clip, "You're not alone"... which was directed at others with paranoid schizophrenia.... I mean... innocent and genuine, but kinda ironic.

[@MaryCannonRealtor]

Definitely not awful! I love seeing this video of you when you were younger. I think it really helps those of us just learning about schizophrenia. You seemed very mature for your age and I think you did a great job then and now and you continue to help others understand.

[@psychedlicsouljam1995]

you are so mean to yourself ahahahaha i subbed probably like 5 years ago , 😊 crazy how much of your life you documented, its awesome! u made a documentary about ur life thats like an ongoing thing, until you die. youtube is a weird place. love it and hate it. i use to use my channel as a personal diary hahaha

[@RandomFlops]

Hey bro, just want you to know you need to love yourself and your past! You GROW out of your past mistakes, and so bashing your old self and posting it online is encouraging such bad thought habits! Love yourself bro. I laughed my ass off at the beginning but towards the end I really just realized it's unhealthy to be criticizing yourself like this!

[@StarLeo_]

Gotta start somewhere!

[@zenith5584]

As some girl with mild dislexia the intro of the 1st video was so funny! 😆

[@SidneySmith678]

I love your old videos. It shows how you have grown and matured. You were very brave and you are even braver today!!

[@rosscampbell2522]

I have been waiting for your reaction to your first line in your first video.... 😂

[@isakhammer6558]

Dont be hard to you younger yourself. That young guy seems wise considering his mental challenges!

[@ninacortex]

They are not embarassing at all. Plus you look like a cute baby 😄

[@psychedlicsouljam1995]

19:06 oMG UR SO CUTE WHEN UR LITTLE AHAHAHA i love ur reaction im dying

[@AlxzAlec]

bro you're all grown up!!!

[@carolburnette2019]

You are brave and inspirational

[@willnewsome233]

You are a trooper bro !

[@aprillongley2859]

In all your videos you sound stable. My son is on medication and I can’t get him out of his bed. May I ask what medication your on.😊

[@itslit3035]

do you still have problems with your son and his medication?

[@itslit3035]

ever tried a psilocybin based therapy?

[@anirbasmalan2928]

You're too hard on yourself. Your videos are raw and real and not trying too hard which gives them their flair. They are honest which is appealing in addition to what the videos are about. Don't shit on yourself so much. Live and let live, that includes yourself. You're alright as is man.

[@Ditchhead]

I made one video recently (as in last night) that would make yours look sane. Thankfully, I didn't make it public or even unlisted, but I still saved it.

[@Mason-1611]

Do you have a video talking about your progression through this process for you, since the time you were diagnosed?

[@LD-jj2tg]

Heyyyy do more of these. They’re insightful

[@LD-jj2tg]

Would’ve liked to know what a “flat effect” is

[@cxdrippy]

this was actually funny and entertaining to watch you should really react to some more old videos

[@tessbessette5365]

stop being so mean to your past self. he was going through a lot. give yourself some grace man

[@MrWicked17]

Have you heard Schizophrenic by ICP is what what did you think of it

[@WATerFIJIISTheBEst7]

I wish I knew him before he would’ve inspired me smmm

[@kerstin.jitschin5861]

I really like your first one ❤️👍🥰

[@stuartmcainsh7069]

u changed a lot in five years g

[@Travis25601]

The egg is actually on my face. I thought that was a bear pride flag in those videos 🙄

[@psychedlicsouljam1995]

i used to post all kinds of psychotic episodes and people were so mean and weird . creepy men too. calling me hot while telling me to kill myself it was not a good time😊

[@phanomtaxskibididoodoo]

Is your gaming channel still active?

[@rareben395]

I don't find it cringe at all man cringe doesn't even exist everything that is cringe is really real a lot of the time and looking back at myself I would cringe too that's normal I guess but understand that for other people it really isnt that bad at all

[@justjulesoriginal]

🤗

[@ukrainianworld236]

Sorry, I haven’t seen your videos, just came across this one. So, I apologize if you have already answered this question before. But if not, here it is. Do you believe in God? Have you ever tried to pray? If yes, how did it feel? If not, why not?

[@theevilsofa942]

why would you torture yourself by watching the first video ever? 😂

[@deleted_handle]

you mean his first channel?

[@NicholasFrancoeur-tt7ed]

2:59

[@UllaPfeiffer]

Hi brennen