Oh no! The Rise of Skywalker was real bad :(

It wasn’t a good movie.
Click your favorite thing that ended up not mattering in Episode IX:
Most of the visuals from Rey’s force vision in TFA / jennynicholson
The entire character of Hux / jennyenicholson
The Knights of Ren / progamerjenny
Poe’s arc in the second movie / spider_jewel
The literal or symbolic implications of the skywalker saber breaking clean in half, including its kyber crystal, when a slightly cracked kyber crystal is the reason Kylo Ren’s blade is extremely volatile and a kyber crystal/saber is typically a symbol for the soul of the character it belongs to / spiderjewel
Rey’s happiness / jennynicholsonvids

[@Nukeguy909]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who?" "Rey'd shadow legends is a hot new mobile gaming experience..."

[@jamessandwich330]

😂

[@_ErickRangel]

This deserves more likes 😂

[@BrandonGiordano]

Top tier comment

[@ayubsalim1303]

Marley Chinn They had two chances to do this in the movie.

[@nickprezzo]

The force is stored in the balls.

[@DiscoGoesOn5067]

_"It's not much, but it's honest work."_ - Palpatine, tending to his Snoke farm.

[@mitchellcrispi3472]

Underrated comment

[@daytulus1189]

After every youtube video I put on my hazmat suit and descend into the comments, and I always leave wondering why. This, this is why.

[@TotallyNotSkylerVT]

Underrated comment... Made me laugh loud for a solid minute.

[@YouSoSpice]

strong

[@michaelboyd2404]

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

[@will493]

Rey naming herself Skywalker definitely feels like they picked the title of the movie first and got all the way through the script before realizing that "Rise of Skywalker" had nothing to do with anything that had happened

[@danzai]

Indeed. Studio Board meeting "Hey guys, a bunch of SW nerds on twitter are complaining that The Last Jedi made luke into a flawed wimp, and now any old joe can be a jedi now! What about the freakin' midichlorians?! We need to bring things back Old School style!" "I Got it. We need to put "Skywalker" in the title!" "Yep, that'll attract those fans that are in fact only a small visible demographic of the true SW fanbase that we actually shouldn't care so much about."

[@weneedaladder8384]

Well the same thing happened in Phantom Menace so the series has a record of it.

[@LieutenantAlaki]

@@weneedaladder8384 Phantom Menace pretty clearly refers to the Sith running things behind the scenes but not properly revealing themselves until the end of the movie. A more accurate comparison would probably be The Force Awakens, a film wherein the Force does not, at any point, awaken. Because, uh, that's not how the Force works.

[@thatllputmarzipaninyourpie3117]

The last Skywalker, Ben Solo rises out of the pit to save Rey. Palpatine says himself that Ben is the last Skywalker btw. That's partly what the title refers to.

[@audioin9105]

its um... stylistically designed to be that way? 😆

[@Trucmuch]

"an era of filmmaking where it seems more important to make sure that the audience doesn't predict what's going to happen over making a satisfying ending"

[@KhiemNguyen-ly1wz]

Subverting expectations indeed

[@emilydurkee8664]

The crazy thing is that jenny did predict Ray Palpatine 😢

[@amityislandchum]

I actually prefer the endings and plots that aren't predictable, because it's boring to follow the same basic storyline every online fan wants. This is part of why I loved The Last Jedi. I'd say the problem with RoS is much more the opposite: all the story beats and plots are dumb and contrived for the sake of erasing all of the new, interesting lore built up in the last movie. They retconned all the actual character development so they could check off the boxes of Star Wars Thing Fans Want to See.

[@leirumf5476]

That honestly feels like a copout for not being a skilled enough author to set up and pay off stuff

[@bookfish]

​@@amityislandchum There's a huge difference tho between being able to predict the story because it's predictable and being able to predict the story, because it's written properly and consistently. Fans can predict the later, because there are some crazy theorycrafters who comb trough every bit of lore and notice every little detail, so they can figure it out where the story will go. And it's a super fun thing to do. But what these movies do, is just throwing random shit at the audience and then pat themselves on the back, that no one was able to predict it. But it all happened because they write a story like a 4 year old, who just comes up with bullshit on the go, when they notice that a problem in the story needs to be solved.

[@sooty7681]

Palpatine was able to intercept the force connection between Rey and Kylo, but thanks to Nord VPN you don't have to worry about anyone stealing your force connection

[@AbhNormal]

*Ford VPN sorry

[@matthewstewartshaver8808]

Hahahaha 🤣

[@dearthofdoohickeys4703]

Omg 😂

[@deprivate]

weve been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty

[@pendragonshall]

HAHAHAHAHAHA , ben, BEN is that you?

[@aiden79797]

Anakin's lightsaber was buried in sand, the final roast.

[@DaughterOfFrankenste]

This deserves each and every like.

[@jiffylou98]

C O A R S E AND R O U G H AND IT G E T S E V E R Y W H E R E

[@Speedtale]

Daughter Of Frankenstein anakin be screaming no forever now

[@jmWolfe2585]

Daughter Of Frankenstein Oh god. I just realized that that!

[@ColdHawk]

Ethan Alfonso - Anakin was a bit of a whiner, wasn’t he?

[@paddyq3235]

I would've loved a back and forth between Kylo and Rey where they keep healing eachother, dying, and then re healing eachother, dying, and so on so forth.

[@theway6763]

That would’ve been more entertaining than the dog crap ending we got

[@hazeldavis3176]

The ultimate No U Championship

[@marynoble9464]

That's what supernatural did

[@grimstirr]

until it just sort of....ends

[@bificommander7472]

Reminds me of Order of the stick. Slash "Cure light wounds" Slash "Cure light wounds" Slash "Cure light wounds" "Grrr!" Slash slash slash slash slash "Huff Huff Huff" "Cure moderate wounds" "Screw this, I'll order Thai." "Go team Cleric!"

[@davidkimpton6775]

If it was a transport ship that was identical to the one chewie was on, then that means it was a prisoner transport ship. Meaning Rey definitely still killed innocent prisoners

[@CNWhatImSaiyan]

Yeah, but only one of them had an established & named character, so the statistics stands on that

[@Cdr2002]

Tbf other than chewie it seems like the first order didn’t succeed in capturing anyone and I doubt they were hauling around prisoners from a previous mission

[@henryapplebottom7231]

🤷‍♀️🤷🏾‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️

[@ArtyomPlatonev]

​@@Cdr2002Then why did they need two prisoner transports?

[@Cdr2002]

@@ArtyomPlatonev oh I dunno, I ain’t a defender for the movie lmao I know it’s not that good. The real reason is the story needed a fakeout. If I had to stretch for a headcanon id say their prisoner transport ships and troop transports are of a fundamentally similar design and cross-compatible function

[@agihammerthief8953]

Ah yes, Palpatine the humble Snoke farmer, peacefully tending to his Snokes

[@Juwce_86]

I love this.

[@alexbrundage4733]

It ain’t much, but it’s honest work

[@reallylionbastard]

Farming ? Really? A man of your talents?

[@addyrovirosa1800]

@@alexbrundage4733 Lol I was just about to say that 😂😂😂

[@RRRanTV]

Perfectly balanced, as things should be.

[@alepenagorbe9135]

"I'm Rey." "Rey who?" "I don't have a family... I'm alone." "Rey Solo, then"

[@jakerosler3698]

Full circle.

[@Aarkwrite]

Underrated call back

[@starryyynightzzz4691]

Still a better line than the movie

[@shoopmahboop1374]

I would have liked that WAYY more than the actual line lol

[@thedandelionman2006]

That actually would suck but not as much as in the actual movie 'Rey Skywalker'

[@iangeorge7913]

I'll never forget I had to use the bathroom during the movie, and when I got back I asked my wife what happened and she said "Oh Chewy was blown up in a space ship but we already know he's fine."

[@jordancox559]

The ancient sith knife being exactly lined up with the fresh death star wreckage is beyond hilarious

[@KerythDraws]

That entire sequence tho. The death star somehow didnt get atomized even though we saw it happen. The remains of it landed on a random planet instead of floating in space or landing on Endor. The remains magically didnt burn up on entry or disintegrate on impact. The remains didn't shift or move from the insane tidal forces of the ocean it was sitting in for decades. The wreckage wasn't stripped and looted by the resistance even though its invaluable. Rey magically can handle a boat in a squall despite living on a desert forever. And just so much more.

[@LutraLovegood]

As far as Sith artifacts go, that would be a pretty cool one.

[@mredbadger]

That whole sequence felt like a Professor Layton puzzle

[@la_scrittice_vita]

9 out of 10 video game fetch quests can't be wrong.

[@o3941]

@@KerythDraws "Rey magically can handle a boat in a squall despite living on a desert forever." This is the only one I can give a pass to because of "The Force". Everything else? Yeah, I don't buy it whatsoever.

[@AmazingBob228]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who?" *Rey looks away for a rude amount of time and the lady walks away uninterested in hearing her finish*

[@85481]

I was seriously hoping this would happen and disappointed that it didn't.

[@TheBookkeepersCottage]

Kevin Eontrainer lol

[@ctkachuk08]

@@KevinEontrainer381 using the "r" word, even in pun form, is gross and you should do better.

[@atomic_wait]

I was waiting for them to sneak in a title call-out, and I was heartbroken that she didn't reply '...Rey Star Wars.'

[@jeremymain7303]

@@ctkachuk08 We shouldn't use puns. Puns are hurtful. And emotionally we're all children now.

[@karak962]

Rey's parents sold her to one direction

[@annie7716]

Underated comment

[@abigailc8829]

@@annie7716 Agreed

[@macdeus2601]

Star Wars's parents sold it to Disney, just like Billy Ray Cyrus.

[@gpliskin]

During The Purge.

[@EspaALSC]

If i wasnt in a roo with other people i would have screamed from laughter at this comment

[@StrawberryCamilk]

the retcon with rey’s parents made me irrationally angry

[@carlosperalta1714]

Same here.

[@augustwest9727]

Every single time I see the soldier reach out and rub the ground, put it in his mouth and then spitting it out and saying "Salt". It makes my head want to explode...

[@mrh8142]

Nah that anger is completely rational

[@phonepunk7888]

Funny that you call JJ a toddler for upending the previous movie. He was just inspired by previous toddler Rian Johnson. He talked about this in pre-release interviews, being inspired by Rian's "sod it" attitude. Also kind of hard to think Kylo was telling the truth when he told her she "had no place in the story" and she is literally the most important person in the trilogy. I think you just have some irrational attachment to Reylo.@@holographicwing

[@wesshiflet2214]

@@phonepunk7888what did Rian “upend” besides killing off Snoke in favor of the more interesting villain lol? I guess having the main three characters split up?

[@premiertrainingFL]

“Rey who?” “Reyy…bies” and then she growls and bites the old woman, and then episode f*cking 10 has werewolves the end

[@jefffu3820]

This video is confusing; you should have opened with a shot of you leaving your spaceship, so we would know how you got there.

[@ashikjaman1940]

This actually wouldn't work because Jenny popped into existence in her room along with her giant porg

[@charlesherbig4502]

@@ashikjaman1940 I guess you’re not a True Fan because Jenny has a video of her going to get her giant porg.

[@ashikjaman1940]

@@charlesherbig4502 those are lies being sold by Big Jenny for views

[@charlesherbig4502]

@@ashikjaman1940 You sound like one of those people who believes all kinds of conspiracy theories about the Military-Jenny-Industrial Complex.

[@DomR1997]

You two should just kiss and get it over with.

[@jonsnow6628]

“Rey, honey. Your parents just left in a blue Honda Civic. It’s not the same one.”

[@nectarinn3]

They both left to get some green milk twenty years ago, and haven't come back.

[@commandercaptain4664]

Looked like a Pinto to me.

[@Riprake]

Heck, *I* have an old (2007) blue Honda Civic, and that make and model really doesn't change its appearance much from year to year. I regularly see others just like it in parking lots almost everywhere I go.

[@jardelelias5625]

@@commandercaptain4664 Ah, the car with that one fundamental flaw. Classic Star Wars.

[@RoamingAdhocrat]

I had a blue Honda Civic once. It was a distress purchase, from Gumtree, when my previous car extremely broke down mid-journey in Glasgow. "Bulletproof engine" crowed the listing, but the engine was a colander for distributing oil onto the road. Scrapped it a few months later…

[@bindablinda]

dear evan hansen: anybody has a map? rise of skywalker: everybody has a map

[@CNWhatImSaiyan]

Oh my god…!😅

[@renaissanceman9299]

I like to play club music while I play this video and pretend we’re at the club and this girl is yelling everything in my ear over the music

[@BallstinkBaron]

I don't know why this doesn't have more likes lmfaoooo

[@CharlieQuebec-fb6ho]

I'm just thinking of that scene from American psycho with defoe and bale at the restaurant

[@bjd4]

“I’m Rey” “Rey who?” Smiles to the distance “Rey Rey Abrams”

[@luckyDancer100]

Sister of Jar Jar

[@andrewmartin3671]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who?" Smiles to the distance "Rey STAR WARS™"

[@aboutface102]

She should have just farted loudly as a response.

[@kennel878Xx]

@sabizos5897 *end credits roll music plays*

[@ColeMacho]

Rey Mysterio (booyaka booyaka)

[@KorraDanvers]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who?" Looks off dramatically to the horizon "Rey Star Wars"

[@casperchristiansen2458]

Cousin of Sans Undertale and the Undertale family.

[@alexintheabstract]

I hope you’re the original person who tweeted this.

[@elidasilva5558]

Rey Star Wars makes sense. She is pretty much God at this point

[@derekrequiem4359]

Wow its like we both saw the exact same tweet! Lol!!!!! That's so hilarious hahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@aaronsibley]

wow this is a tweet from twitter dot com how original of you!!

[@KwizzyDaAwesome]

The way that Han Solo looked at Rey, when she wasn’t looking, had such sadness in it I thought for sure he suspected or outright knew exactly who she was. It didn’t have to be anyone important - a Kenobi or whatever - but imagine if Han knew her parents from his smuggling days or the rebellion and seeing this girl and being like “Okay, Force - I can take a hint.” Imagine if they threw a couple of douchebags in Solo, maybe friends of his, and they talk about their contacts in Jakku or one of them is pregnant or they jokingly offer to sell one of their kids for a whiskey - one of several kids. What if Han knew Rey was a no-one, and knew exactly what neglect had landed her on Jakku and it kills him that she thinks her parents are coming back because she’s clearly a way better person than they ever were? Luke, Leia - they wouldn’t get it because they had loving families, but Han would get it. It sets up the foil way better that Ben Solo is such a tremendous fuck up despite good people parents. But if Rey can choose to be good then so can Ben, and that gives Han hope - enough hope that he got close enough to let Ben kill him. Rey trying to redeem Ben is revealed to be her trying to forgive herself for force-crippling her parents ship or even just freaking them out by manifesting force powers, and Ben points out that she’s not very Jedi of her. That makes Rey doubt herself. Then she has an emotional journey to go through that Luke, guilty over losing Ben to the dark side, can actually help her with or even just be a companion as maybe he’s still working through it. Now you have spiritual stakes. Hell, she can still be a Kenobi - maybe Obi-Wan’s parents sold him to the Jedi when his force powers manifested, and his siblings never manifested powers, but once one of their kids did they were like “oh shit there’s no Jedi order to dump this kid with and we do not need this kind of attention.” There, we’ve fixed it in the comments.

[@hazelsingh3887]

beautiful! the fans honestly are blowing jj out of the water, it’s sad.

[@oddcrafter1270]

Excellently rewritten!

[@madsstokes]

Why did this make me cry x.x

[@mrh8142]

I love this

[@JazzMaster01]

"Nobody important - like a Kenobi or whatever -" 😂lmao that cracked me up

[@ironbacon]

Before i saw it i though "somehow Palpatine returned" was a joke making fun of the movie, not an actual line

[@Norrsky]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who? Who are your people?" "I have no people" "Rey... Solo..."

[@roxanneconner7185]

Seriously this would've made so much sense

[@-MrFozzy-]

Would have been so much better haha! Good job!

[@robnos9901]

I'm Rey...Rey-turn of the Jedi....sigh.

[@mistersydster]

Rey who? Rey Liota

[@gateauxq4604]

Dude, I was so ready for that. It woulda been perfect and also made the Solo movie have some vague relevance.

[@jay9780]

“I’m Rey” “Rey who?” Looks away dramatically “Rey Rey Abrams”

[@ian_b]

"I'm J J Reybrams"

[@borjaslamic]

@@ian_b Rey Rey Reybrams

[@i_dont_know_who_i_am69]

Rey Rey Binks

[@Amitlu]

You can call him Rey, or you can call him Rey Rey.

[@4867503]

@@Amitlu If Rey Rey come round here lookin' for me...you don't go droppin' a dime, do you's?

[@chrisandrew7577]

It's crazy to me that I saw this in theaters and after being bombarded with so many stupid things I actually have zero recollection of anything that actually happened

[@rolanslide8509]

To me the issue with this trilogy is that they had all of these ideas but very few ideas on how to do anything impactful or effective with them. Like they think "maybe we should have a more diverse cast with a female lead" and "maybe a main character is a reformed storm trooper" and "what if Leia and Han's son is turned to the dark side" but they don't think about it further than that. Like Jenny said, it's just a list of things.

[@sebastianbelcher5354]

Blame the Fandom Menace. Rian Johnson expanded on those ideas. Rey had dark side tendencies and longed for a family, only to find out her parents weren't anyone special. Ren turns more to the dark side and longs to be supreme leader which he ultimately does in TLJ. Finn, while a former storm trooper, still didn't see what the resistance was fighting for until he sees enslaved people often overlooked during the war, and the greedy wealthy who sweep things under the rug. Some really angry fans didn't want to accept these plot developments and Disney caved to shallow nostalgia. If only RJ (who btw was closest in showing us what GL intended for the sequels) had directed the sequels, we would have not gotten a soft reboot of the OT.....if only......

[@McDLT999999999999999]

@@sebastianbelcher5354 Yes, it's always the fan's fault.

[@la_scrittice_vita]

If it was anyone but JJ, I would say for sure there was a plan and Rian just crapped all over it/made it unusable. But I've seen enough of Lost and Star Trek, that I wouldn't actually bet money on it.

[@RossAllaire]

Low-key your funniest line here: "They wanted to protect her, but yes, money did change hands."

[@ouijedanse]

Gotta respect that hustle.

[@brianstorm5488]

I busted out an LOL at "Maybe Po has trouble with object permanence." The verbal gems are consistent throughout.

[@YeTheGOATNoCap]

Ethical human trafficking 😊

[@Niobesnuppa]

@@brianstorm5488 Finn, you mean.

[@DS-wp2dj]

the last two movies Palpatine was just standing around on his veranda with a pipe in his mouth watching his crop of Snokes ripening for harvest.

[@gateauxq4604]

His farm was next to Thanos’s but he ignored Palpatine because the snokes were a very smelly crop

[@Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet]

Dr. Krieger?!

[@visitkotor9663]

Palpatine with a cowboy hat: "That be some good harvestin', yee haw"

[@ladyvalerian6423]

It ain't much but it's dishonest work

[@kossend1]

@@gateauxq4604 "I finally rest, and watch the sun rise on a Snoke-ful universe."

[@tommink8379]

Leia clutching the medal from the battle of Yavin... that she didn't receive. Like a high school football coach wearing a print overrun t-shirt from the '96 semifinals

[@ZacksRockingLifestyle]

Wasn’t that Han’s medal? Wouldn’t a better analogy be a widow clutching her passed husband’s war medals on her deathbed?

[@jackmaney4276]

Palpatine exclaiming to the galaxy "WHAT'S UP, SUCKERS? I'M ALIVE!!!" is the most un-Palpatine like thing ever.

[@CharlieQuebec-fb6ho]

But it's something Ian McDirmand would do

Rey should have said "just Rey" at the end. It's a callback to the beginning when she doesn't know how to answer to the little girl but this time she says it with confidence, showing her journey.

[@vasari9198]

The film would have to be called the rise of Rey, which is actually better.

[@francescapatti2934]

Stop expecting good writing. That would have been an awesome idea.

[@francescapatti2934]

@@vasari9198 It could still be the rise of Skywalker, but Kylo is the Skywalker. (I know his name is Solo, but he's Leia's son too and he's a Jedi)

[@vasari9198]

@@francescapatti2934 But Kylo didn’t rise. He literally and figuratively fell. We’re spending way too much time thinking about this! 😀

[@bookshelfhoney]

Just dog? Just dog

[@emmagrenier8277]

One planet only exists to make Poe straight

[@ladyvader2648]

True dat. Lmao.

[@pixelpeas3025]

and a drug dealer.

[@daneroberts1996]

the power, to be so obviously in love with your friend that the writers invent a whole world to try and deny it

[@SoyBioIogia]

@@pixelpeas3025 ehhhhhh i wasn't surprised

[@CEDEREL]

@@SoyBioIogia which is the problem. they did that just to to fulfill racist stereotypes about latino characters. it sucks lmao

[@jackshephard698]

this video is still the only way i've experienced this film and i regret nothing

[@kumatorahaltmanndreemurr]

This video is ten times more entertaining than the actual movie. You’re not missing much

[@davidbowles7281]

This and the Red Letter Media review.

[@cthulhuhoops]

Same lol Also through the Reylos mega edit of the sequel trilogy (with improved ending!)

[@dsc9894]

The way Jenny says “like a pickle” and it cuts because it sounds like she’s gonna start laughing is the best

[@Persephone_Personified]

In the Reylo fandom we’ve giggled about pickled Snokes for years now. It’s the single worst and best thing in the entire movie.

[@penguinsrbirds2]

"I think the worst thing a franchise ending can do is make you feel kind of stupid and embarrassed for being so excited for it in the first place." Game of Thrones fans relate.

[@pinkwings8036]

Audrey shout out from the magic the gathering fans too. We just had a big arc end with at least seven main characters being done dirty.

[@penguinsrbirds2]

@@pinkwings8036 Oof, you have my condolences.

[@fusionnm]

I was about to write this exact comment and by chance saw this first. It's sad that two legacies came down to this.

[@ColdHawk]

Audrey - Knowing the kind of pure joy Jenny derived from Star Wars, that statement is so damn sad. It reminds me of the tragedy of watching someone break a promise to a child and then mock the kid for having been excited by what they were promised. : (

[@kriegaone3658]

Except the Sequels were bad from the start, but TFA left a chance for a Sequel to repair it's damage, TLJ threw that chance out the window. TROS is just spitting on a dead corpse.

[@Feeddahbirds]

Rey enters Tosche Station Rey: "I'm here to pick up some power converters" Station Clerk: "Name on the order?" Rey: "Skywalker." Luke Force Ghost: **Thumbs Up** Ending that finally resolves the power converters and supports small business and keeps the cringe.

[@Chipiliro613]

If I could give you worthless Reddit points for this comment I would

[@Loalrikowki]

And then the walking bassline from Seinfeld plays.

[@tamarleahh.2150]

Tosche station kept those converters for 50 years. Best customer service ever

[@lmac40762]

Can uncle owen and aunt beru be force ghosts as well

[@Eric-ef5qm]

This is canon.

[@melleen629]

im so late to this conversation but, I'm really interested in the detail that they designed this futuristic bandage to help heal Kylo's lightsaber wound on his face, which seems to have worked very well...but when Hux is wounded from a blaster shot, he is wearing a simple white bandage and and walking on a stick like he just got thrown out of a cartoon dust cloud brawl.

[@BassLiberators]

That high tech bandage probably cost as much as a star destroyer.

[@Weirdanimalboy]

It’s because he was ginger 😢

[@pseudonymeantipersonnelle2190]

I watched it for the first time yesterday. Two third into the movie and I thought that the hate was exaggerated. Not that made the first part good, it’s bad, but not outrageously bad. And then the 3rd act began. I didn’t know a movie could go exponentially bad scene after scene. I was so angry at the end. I am maybe 15 minutes into your video, and you’re nailing everything that updated me. Notably the rolling text. Thank you, I feel less alone

[@gloria571]

“I’m Rey” “Rey who?” “Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Rey”

[@IsaacMayerCreativeWorks]

YES

[@thikkiewalrus3377]

YES

[@neokg5624]

YES

[@tremolo2109]

*Dark'ness

[@robkino6137]

Pretty much, yeah.

[@Takemetopigfarts]

Stranger: “Who are you?” Rey, surrounded by her resistance friends: “I’m Rey... Rey-sistance”

[@joeschembrie9450]

That's very Poe-etic.

[@Bustaperizm]

I hope we're Finn-ished here.

[@silverhawkroman]

Rey: I am a Skywalker (furthering the legacy) Also Rey: *buries the skywalkers lightsabers* (ending the legacy) Me: what

[@joeschembrie9450]

@@Bustaperizm We were as soon as Skywalker a-Rose.

[@benl2140]

What the Hux is wrong with you people?

[@MyKingofdiamonds]

I wouldn’t hate the whole “the dead speak!” thing if it weren’t for the fact that they used Palpatine’s announcement for a Fortnite tie-in instead of in a trailer

[@Lilitha11]

The movie should of ended with her saying, "I am Rey...Rey Palpatine!" Then she force lightnings the random old lady.

[@kokepasu4583]

Rey burying the lightsabers in the desert has the same energy as Luke saying "Aunt Beru" as his dying words

[@shakespeare4bears]

I thought that woman at the work end was going to turn out to be Aunt Beru. She’d be all like, ‘oh yeah, I actually survived. I just never told Luke, for some reason’

[@maverick5408]

@@celebrimborposting9251 The dead speak! The galaxy has heard a message, a sinister delivery of BLUE MILK in the voice of the late AUNT BERU

[@RoamingAdhocrat]

@@shakespeare4bears run, don't walk, to Darths & Droids, where (spoiler alert) Owen and Beru are canonically alive and amongst the Rebel commandos assaulting the Peace Moon's shield generator on the Endor moon.

[@pasu2k]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who?" "I don't have a family" "So, Rey Solo"

[@EternalGuardian07]

Accurate

[@ItsPawsome]

amazing!!

[@marthia8015]

Rey thinks of Ben and Han dying and starts crying

[@Guitarmonade]

This is cursed.

[@ryanthecoolestkidever7835]

Honestly this would've been better with Jan being like a father figure in the force awakens

[@civildisorder]

So I had Ep 9 spoiled for me ages ago. I read synopsis and commentaries on it, watched videos (including this one!), but only just tonight watched the film first hand. Did all of that predispose me to things? Yes. But I was also catching onto things that people weren't mentioning. The film had a frantic editing style to it, minor details like characters handing objects between each others hands didn't get shown. One minute Rey is holding the knife, then on the camera cut 3P0 is holding it. That sort of minor thing is EVERYWHERE in this film. And then there's the literal copying JJ did of the climaxes of Empire and Return of the Jedi. His idea for 7, 8, and 9 was to repeat 4, 5, and 6 in the big respects. Yikes.

[@givecamichips]

The knife map is something that would show up in a puzzle in a PS1 or DS game because it would show off/justify the fact that it can use 3D models. Plus weird puzzles using whatever key items you have are relatively expected in that medium.

[@KerythDraws]

Thats an insult to the clever puzzle design of the original playstation games. Example, silent hill. Puzzle items have connections to the lore and inform you about the world while also informing you in a clever way how to solve the puzzle. Rey just straight up happens to be standing in the exact spot she needed to be for the bullshit knife ruler to match and everything works out cause screenwriting is hard.

[@mredbadger]

It did make me think of Professor Layton, or like that part in Ace Attorney where you have to rotate a pot to get it to match up with the silhouette in the drawing

[@ruudmc]

"I'm Rey." "Rey who?" "Rey Turnofthejedi."

[@inertia186]

*"What? Did you say Jimmy Scrambles?"*

[@JMarchel]

Classic

[@Kurtperry41]

Trixie Mattel voice: WELCOME TO THE STAGE, REY TURNOFTHEJEDI

[@janetplanet4595]

OMG!!! IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW!!!

[@OsmSkylandersCheats]

You mean Rey Dshadowlegends?

[@dekubro413]

Jenny: makes a list of silly predictions about the movie Abrams: “write that down!”

[@Retsonine]

The Js in JJ Abrams secretly stand for Jenny. She did this. She's been Palpatine-ing us this whole time.

[@mattjohnson380]

@@Retsonine Now I'm picturing a jar stuffed full of of JJ Abrams' just out of camera view. "I MADE JJ."

[@millica]

All the trailers until she makes her prediction videos are just elaborate deepfakes, and the SECOND she drops the vid, the writing process begins.

[@demongo2007]

Deku Bro “Get that girl a contract!”

[@xnetpc]

Maybe Hasbro follows suit and bases My Little Pony G5 on Friendship is Witchcraft.

[@edgarallenhoe3518]

The "your son will die" vs kylo dying issue feels like the sort of problem that happens when a prophecy is introduced into a story before the writer decides how it's going to be resolved, and then several installments later they clumsily try to twist the events to match and it doesnt quite fit. But it sounds like the prophecy is both introduced and resolved in this movie! So when JJ decided how the end was gonna go, why didnt he rewrite the prophecy to fit it better??

[@la_scrittice_vita]

Always assume the soothsayer/scroll/dream frog spouting prophesy is full of shit.

[@FortuitousOwl]

I never understood why Rey being naturally gifted needed some big explanation or was like a plot hole. Like, do the people that think that see a child prodigy with perfect pitch or something and demand to know what famous composer they must be secretly related to?

[@eamk887]

I totally agree. Like, I'm pretty sure the canon has established that some people are just more naturally gifted than others.

[@jorgeloredo100]

Imagine a movie about Mozart where at 6 years old having 0 knowledge about music starts playing the piano flawlessly and embarasses a piano teacher. It's just silly, the real problem with Rey is that she's pooling tricks that take years to master with absolutely no training whatsoever. Regardless if she's a prodigy or not her character suffers from this, and instead of explaining that she was trained but they messed her mind to forget or smth they decided to say that just because she's related to palps she can do all that which is even more stupid.

[@FortuitousOwl]

@@jorgeloredo100 the nature of the force as a power is kind of flux in the movies. And seeing as it’s not really a technical skill I’m not sure why a person can’t just be powerful to start with. Like she isn’t perfect, she blows up a ship while trying to pull it which is a technical skill that can be trained. I agree the explanation was bad, that was my point lol but I don’t think it requires some big explanation. She obviously knows how to fight and survive because of a life where she had to take care of and raise herself on Jakku. Fighting is a super technical skill.

[@eamk887]

@@jorgeloredo100 Well, I personally don't mind it, since this is a fictional movie set in a fictional universe with a fictional magic system. I'm able to believe that some people are just very strong in the force naturally. And when it comes to the specific instances, I think Rey using the mind trick is okay, since she just learned how to influence minds accidentally by Kylo doing it to her, and I'm also okay with her winning the fight against Kylo, since Kylo was already injured, and Rey had already been shown to be at least somewhat good at fighting.

[@flerbus]

@@jorgeloredo100 and he is also a great spaceship pilot too , oh and a crack shot with a laser pistol

[@Ileric]

"The worst thing a franchise ending can do is make you feel kind of stupid and embarrassed for being so excited about it in the first place." - Jenny Nicholson I realy felt that :'(

[@poughkeepsieblue]

Yea, I saw The Sopranos too.

[@daviddedominici1705]

GoT

[@jared1964]

That's how I felt about The Last Jedi

[@dragon1011dk]

@@jared1964 Same. Saw it last night. I want my money back, and I didnt even pay to see it...But I want my money back.

[@ninahatendo6827]

I got flashbacks to the 4th season of Sherlock

[@Kittyhalk]

Honestly Hux doing everything out of Pure Spite was the funniest part of the movie and an absolute mood

[@JMarchel]

It makes all of my Kylux fanfiction all the more enjoyable

[@La-PetitMort]

@@JMarchel do they hate fuck? Do you have a link to your work 👀

[@GEORGEMEISTERFTW]

@@La-PetitMort jesus fuck 😂

[@ozmarichardson6524]

@@JMarchel got any Sheev-lo stuff?

[@JMarchel]

@@ozmarichardson6524 I'm not judging but Jesus Christ. I'd just try browsing ao3, you can filter by pairing

[@cogsworther1639]

I swear, Palpatine's "reveal" of his plan felt more like a Yu-Gi-Oh villain explaining new card game mechanics as the movie went on for how disconnected everything felt. "Ah, I came back from the dead thanks to one of my many magic powers." "Ah, actually, if you kill me, I get your body for some reason." "Ah, actually, even if *you* don't kill me, the fact that the two of you are in the same room lets me go super-saiyan." I just had no idea what the hell he was doing at any time

[@supme7558]

Did people realy watch that stupid show i couldnt even get through the title

[@supme7558]

Did you maen Naruto

[@LutraLovegood]

I'm no expert on the EU, so that ending really felt like it came out of left field. You'd think an old man who can be thrown off a cliff wouldn't have taken ten levels in badass just because he's a clone now.

[@LargeAndRobustPeter]

i am a 41 year old man - you are my hero. i never saw this movie - now i want to cause you make it sound horrifically funny

[@TiredTyler23]

Rey should have said “I am the Senate” when that old lady asked who she was Missed opportunity smh

[@sour_peckanmix]

Or when she said "I'm all the Jedi"

[@lycanrocx1121]

Rey "The Senate Jr." Skywalker

[@jeremymain7303]

@@sour_peckanmix "I'm every Jedi! It's all in meeeeee! Any duel you want done baby, I'll do it naturally. Oh. Oh. Ohoh."

[@SeraphimRoad]

"It's treason then..."

[@LordNexusTheFir]

@@lycanrocx1121 LMFAO 😂😂

[@iminer978]

My favorite part was every time Rose showed up and then a hook appeared and dragged her off-screen like in a Vaudeville show

[@laurenrose1462]

It hurts so bad to laugh at this. lol

[@AlainNavasDrama]

I feel really bad for the actress, she's a victim for Rian Johnson's dumb character....But its was totally hilarious..Everyone's going on an adventure, and the story is like "NO YOU STAY!"

[@FullMPTV]

@T Doran Do you always project your racism onto other people like a typical leftist?

[@faeinthebay]

@@FullMPTV They're a troll, but I have a feeling you are too. But at least I can laugh at you for taking the bait.

[@rexlesser3640]

@@FullMPTV Do you like Fortnite just like every other zoomer on the planet, or are you a boomer trying to zoom with the zoomers?

[@zhiguli8]

And four years later, JJ Abrams hasn't directed anything else. 🙂

[@sdagoth3037]

That's a silver lining for sure.

[@karmanator2]

Pretty sure you'd get an audible groan popping his name up in a theater preview ala M. Night Shamalan

[@michellecrocker2485]

Rey was a secret sith princess. I get that her parents wanted to protect her from psycho grandpa but with all those clones, she must have had like 30 uncles they could have shipped her off to, unless unkar plutt was an uncle?

[@mrdarklight]

"Jedi have killed before... it's not always a dark side act." It's worse than that: Jedi have killed PALPATINE before.

[@alexjames7670]

The Jedi have like the worst killing skills ever, Napoleon.

[@mrdarklight]

@@alexjames7670 They're like my favorite killers.

[@alexjames7670]

@@mrdarklight I admit, mine too. But if they had only put uncle Rico in in the fourth quarter . . .

[@mrdarklight]

@@alexjames7670 Actually, there's this electrical device you can get online...

[@alexjames7670]

@@mrdarklight Lol. It would be awesome to see you and Kip fight with lightsabers, even though he basically has no ninja fighting skills.

[@harpodjangorose9696]

“I’m Rey” “Rey who?” “Rey-2D2.”

[@Chipiliro613]

_She was a robot all along..._

[@sdagoth3037]

"Rey-3PO"

[@josepheastham9717]

Rey from nowhere

[@zmanattacksyou]

Finally he had something important as an active role in the movie

[@kevinnevada5342]

Cue CSI Miami theme song

[@Hiccupsinator]

12:00 "Wow, Finn is really bad at object permanence!" The idea of Finn not having object permanence, a skill that toddlers develop, is so funny to me lmao😂. Makes me wish that was the actual explanation for it.

[@johnhutchinson7343]

I have watched this video about Rise of Skywalker many more times than I've seen Rise of Skywalker. Happy about that.

[@louieyovino]

The "Finn is really bad at object permanence" bit would also reinforce the running joke that stormtroopers can't aim, so it's really a win-win

[@bobsempletank5362]

That should've been a genuine thing they did throughout the movies

[@bookshelfhoney]

@@bobsempletank5362 Finn and Poe at the target practice range would be such a good scene

[@JustinTheGrey]

LMK

[@witchflowers6942]

@@JustinTheGrey let.. me .. know ??

[@JustinTheGrey]

@@witchflowers6942 I definitely fell asleep with autoplay on and somehow managed to leave this comment. Regardless, I stand by my demands. Just let me know.

[@MustacheDemon]

Me: watched Jenny read Foster’s Rey-cyborg fan fiction right before going to see the Rise of Skywalker The first ten mins of the film: Organa puts a meaningful hand on Rey’s shoulder and says “never underestimate a droid” Me: No

[@colinftp3288]

lmfaoooo

[@adlantian6334]

I think you mean Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

[@MrJoakyfran]

Also: clones of snoke

[@maschaorsomething]

Bless this comment and bless you, I was screaming

[@pinkiepie379]

Yo I felt the exact same

[@Xexelli]

Just sad in bed watching your vids again to stave off deeper sads. Thanks for making really great rant/research vids.

[@Mammongus]

Stay strong friend

[@holdintheaces7468]

"This film is just a weird checklist of things that are meant to satisfy star wars fans..." Is exactly how I felt about the The Force Awakens and why I did not watch the other two. I couldn't see them coming back around from the parade of obvious references thrown in your face in the bluntest way possible. It felt insulting.

[@larrymunn5279]

Same. Watched them years later just out of curiosity and opportunity. First one was obvious social justice messaging mixed with plot line regurgitation or even cloning. Second felt like it was building... Something. Lotta plot holes but I tried to stow any logic as best I could after all, this is star wars where gravity is exactly the same everywhere there is no such thing as air pressure and all air is breathable. And space wizard knights with laser swords that aren't lasers clash. Anyways! But then I saw the third movie, and it took me by the hand and gave me an immersive experience into what psychosis feels like.

[@pologoone6639]

"Rey who?" "Rey, Rey Palpatine, Jakkus greatest love machine."

[@kevinaustin51]

I need a parody of this

[@ClaudiaNW]

She was a cat who really was gone

[@jerimywilliamson9673]

I loved that song.

[@ErrorNotFound-ex2gk]

why? why would you do this to me?

[@AdmiralBonetoPick]

Jakku's (apostrophe)

[@ND-yr8bg]

My favourite part of the movie was when Palpatine ruined his own plan by telling Rey the entire thing

[@Generationrhino]

The writers now, are like "It's supposed to be cheesy..like the OT." However, the OT is only cheesy because it has old fashioned values of heroism imho.

[@Chipiliro613]

The real secret plan was the one we were told about...openly.

[@Junebug89]

Subverting expectations good, subverting awful tropes bad!

[@rkstevenson5448]

@@Generationrhino Well, if everyone would fucking decide whether they wanted it like the OT or to be its own thing, the writers could settle on something.

[@lazymansload520]

Come to think of it, he kinda did that with Luke.

[@Robbyrool]

It would have been cool if, at the end, Rey says “Well, I have really enjoyed all the star wars!”

[@brandonvescovo1735]

**Rey Skywalker proceeds to sing Katy Perry's "Rise"** Finn: "Ah! Skywalker! She's rising!" **END CREDITS**

[@inimitableminimalist]

Star War... never changes

[@bananbom]

"Also unrelated, but this is stupid" could describe this entire movie

[@krusnik94]

Lines of dialogue Ben Solo says after his redemption Ben Solo: "Ow"

[@TheAkwarium]

it is frustrating yes, but maybe that's a good thing, they'd have ruined it with idiotic dialogue like the rest of the movie. They just let Adam do his thing and I think it worked for the best.

[@StopReadingMyNameOrElse]

He got blasted by Chewies crossbow, something that sends people flying, and grunted. But that hurt?

[@tomatomelvin]

@noisyflowers In my theater it was actually when they kissed then he died for no reason

[@CharlieTooHuman]

Tomato Melvin There was a reason... Ben didn’t want to commit to a relationship, so he force faded out real quick.

[@tomatomelvin]

@@CharlieTooHuman dude really said ow and dipped

[@tealduckduckgoose]

One thing I'm shocked no one ever talks about is how stupid it is that kylo gets Luke's lightsaber and rey gets leia's. Rey was following what luke wanted for her, she wanted to be part of Luke's family. Kylo was called back from the dark side by his mother, and he never forgave Luke trying to kill him. The only reason I see for them getting their repsective lightsaber is because one was a ""boy"" lightsaber and the other was a ""girl"" lightsaber. (I realize this is 7 months late, but w/e)

[@blokey8]

Also the amusing notion that Kylo takes up this saber like it's Excalibur, having thrown away his own one. The most notable deeds done pre-ST with that weapon are the crippling of Mace Windu, the summary execution of Count Dooku and the dismemberment of a a room full of children.

[@cvdk6642]

THANK YOU

[@JohannDakitsch]

Also i wish they were at least different colors because it was very hard to tell which was which during that scene

[@blokey8]

@@JohannDakitsch It also didn't help that they were using blue sabers in a very blue place - amusing as Luke's saber was green because Lucas and Marquand realised they were shooting its first appearance against a blue sky and changed the colour for that reason. Added to that, Kylo's fight with the Knights is pretty incoherent and they're all dudes in black with weapons that don't light up (anyone else find it weird that they didn't get vibro/plasma blades like Snoke's guards?)

[@davidv4018]

I guess, it all comes down to the notion that Leia is a Skywalker. I think what JJ tried to do: Make a story in which Leia Organa accepts herself as a Skywalker. Like, accept Luke as his brother and accepts Vader as someone who was redeemed. Abrams seemed to be obsessed in closing abandoned storylines from the Original Trilogy, and this probably is one of them. I speculate that there were lots of scenes about Leia coming to terms with her legacy that were left behind. So, Rey does it for her. TRoS is about Leia (and the Jedi) using Rey as a puppet, so this idea wouldn't be so crazy.

[@meepk633]

It's not that I think the #1 job of hats is to keep you dry when it's raining. They are rarely large enough to keep even your shoulders dry. And that's ignoring sideways rain or walking in the rain. I'm a realist on these matters. HOWEVER, at the very least, I don't think that hats should gather all the rain that would have otherwise hit your head and then funnel it directly onto your ears, shoulders and arms. That's bad design.

[@pringlebatch]

It's just a water feature at that point 😜

[@thetoastisburntgmail]

14:15 Somebody get Evermore Park on phone about this! These guys have maps!

[@SumDumGy]

“I’m Rey.” “Rey who?” “RRREEEEEEEYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!”

[@AmazingGuy13]

@Frank Lucas Finn better be careful, or he'll get his head chopped off by Rey.

[@Alknix]

"Just Rey. I have not people." "So, Rey... Solo." "No. NO. HELL NO." "Rey Solo it is." "Goddamit."

[@IndyDefense]

"Rey. a drop of golden sun!"

[@ThreeWickedWonders]

Rey: "Rey... Skywalker!" Me: "That's not how that works! That's not how any of this works!!!"

[@touko_nanami]

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[@adamdrew7522]

The biggest missed opportunity with Rey Palpatine is they should have made Palpatine act loving and grandfatherly to her. He should have seduced her like Anakin but even more effective because of her desire for family. There should have been a scene of Rey reluctantly fighting Kylo while she claims through tears that no, Palpatine is good she can see it when he's actually just manipulating her. The best villains are ones that exploit the deepest weakness of the protagonist. Palpatine could have done this to Rey better than anyone else. It could have been perfect. He could have offered her family. But, no they made him space Hitler zombie Satan and they fought with swords. Huge missed opportunity.

[@pigrainbowz2960]

While I disagree with Rey Palpatine, having Sheev be manipulative would be more accurate than keeping this a secret from her.

[@kungolaf4499]

Yes! Exactly! They even missed that opportunity. That would have been a perfect fit if Palpatine was to come back!

[@zotharr]

Yes, but the problem with this, it would have required caring about the whole thing, and understanding basic concepts about storytelling and SW

[@nathangomez4409]

Damn that would've been really cool to see. That manipulative and kind old man comes back for a moment, saying things about how all he wanted was for his granddaughter to come back to him. It would've immediately explained how this man could've possibly had a family. If he employed the same tactics he used with Anakin, I think he could absolutely have a family, and he could absolutely manipulate Rey too. And then Rey would have like an actual moral dilemma instead of "do I get the power to save my friends but lose control of my body, thus rendering this power useless and this decision incredibly obvious"

[@amyyy-1915]

‘Space Hitler Zombie Satan’ accurate

[@RogersBase]

Who else is watching this after the Star Wars Hotel video? LOL

[@emilyrhea5077]

"Rey, honey, your parents also just left in a blue honda civic. It's not the same one." 🤣😭💀

[@sandraisyearning]

1:02:31 ”The worst thing a franchise ending can do is make you feel kind of stupid and embaressed for being so excited about it in the first place.” is a really powerful line

[@TheAussiePencil]

Legit. Definitely applies to Game of Thrones. I can't even watch earlier seasons because I know what idiocy it all leads to :(

[@Dinoagent21]

I think we witnessed the end to "The Millennial Falcon"

[@ItsmeTyr]

​@@TheAussiePencil so true! I used to love it and now I can barely stand thinking about it. There are some shows that get bad in later seasons and you just tell people to stop after season XYZ. But GoT fucked up so royaly that it taints even the good seasons.

[@WobblyBits_X]

The only thing this movie made me feel was insulted. That they thought any viewer would be stupid enough to enjoy this vapid slop. I guess they were ultimately right though, there are still legions of weirdos who endlessly hate on TLJ with incoherent reasons (like saying Rian ruined Luke's character as if he wasn't going down the logical continuation of what was set up in TFA) and praise RoS.

[@TomPVideo]

As someone who watched both Star Wars and GoT, it was a double gut punch having both series end like that within only a few months. Big enough that I haven't really gone back to watching anything in any of the fantasy subgenres since.

[@mariodicesare5518]

The real Star Wars: Episode IX: Rise of Skywalker was the Snokes we cloned along the way.

[@dndboy13]

oh god am i a snokes

[@Flatcetera]

dndboy13 we are all snokes

[@mariodicesare5518]

@@Flatcetera It's Snokes all the way down

[@romo_lampkin]

Snokes on a plane

[@nectarinn3]

The rise of Snokes

[@123Voynich]

"Im Rey" "Rey who?" "Rey fly now"

[@bernadmanny]

It's strange how Jenny can make a hour long video about...A. Film. That. Never. Happened. Great work Jenny keep it up. I hope someone someday makes some films set in the Star Wars universe.

[@solesurvivor1002]

"Kill me" "no" *Kills him* *The resistance wins* what

[@SailorOrbiter]

I think it's because she died at the same time, so his soul was just gone.

[@kendrajade6688]

@@SailorOrbiter "DAMN IT! The ONE thing I didn't plan for!"

[@gabrielesegapeli4053]

Ah ah ah! "Hey, JJ, how we end the final fight?" "Ehm...We can...I don't know...Ehm...Why don't we copy a previous film? It worked so well whit episode seven."

[@WokeBegone]

The writers were just incompetent from start to finish, over the whole trilogy, it's astonishing they took so little care of their billion dollar franchise. Anything would do, no quality control, they felt entitled to your money.

[@babydollface]

She didn't kill him herself, she redirected his force lightning against him, so essentially she forced him to kill himself. I thought it was pretty obvious that's what the writers were going for when I first watched the movie but considering I haven't seen anyone else talk about this interpretation I'm second guessing myself idk

[@goatmeal5241]

My favorite moment in RoS is subtle and I haven't heard anyone else mention it: when Kylo calls the First Order meeting about the spy in their midst, he gets side-tracked by sensing Hux's dislike for his new helmet. It's brilliant that, from Hux's point of view, he knows Kylo can read his thoughts, and is vain, and so he blasts the thought "KYLO'S NEW HELMET LOOKS DUMB" to get Kylo off the subject of the spy while letting Kylo like he's won something over Hux and is therefore still in control. Great manipulation, it's a pity the rest of Hux's decision-making and characterization isn't to that level.

[@liamross340]

“Oh yeah Hux was gonna be our villain but we have Palpatine now. I guess make him a spy and then shoot him”

[@eoincampbell1584]

@@liamross340 and then replace him with Hux 2.0 the older, gruffer model.

[@davidv4018]

@@eoincampbell1584 some people say that TRoS is anti TLJ, I don't agree at all. I think TRoS is anti sequel trilogy. The great twist plot of this trilogy: Palpatine takes away the wall paper and the carpet; we are still in episode vi.

[@Val.Kyrie.]

This is the greatest observation ever 🤣

[@angrybrony]

it's so cool that i'm pretty sure it was done on accident.

[@emilymoreno6978]

This movie was so unremarkable that i’m watching this recap and don’t remember almost any of these plot lines lol

[@stonecutter2]

THE DEAD SPEAK! Yeah, like Obi-Wan? And Yoda? And Qui-Gonn? Cloning - secrets only the Sith knew. Kaminoans are Sith now? None of this movie made sense and it was a panic button after Carrie Fisher died. They bumped off Luke to clearly focus on Leia, but then reality happened. I don't envy their attempt to salvage this, but man it was just a series of terrible choices across the entire trilogy by Disney. They were already in a bad spot and God was like - I need Carrie to come make me laugh, so good luck Disney.

[@frostedbutts4340]

>Cloning - secrets only the Sith knew. Kaminoans are Sith now? Oh this is explained.. in an animated series that came out after the movie lmao.

[@wyrmh0le]

I honestly cannot believe the last line wasn't: "Just Rey." But said contentedly with a smile, in contrast to the last time she said it where it was said with insecurity and a bit of sadness, to symbolize that it doesn't matter anymore who her biological family was (and they sucked harder than could be imagined) because she has a new family with her friends in the resistance and family names don't apply so she can be "just Rey" and it's fine. Like when she paused before answering I was actually feeling a little bit of emotion in anticipation of the line that I was sure had to be coming. Instead what had become the familiar feeling of empty confusion returned, only this time there wasn't a new scene to make me forget the dumb thing that had just happened.

[@ce7.0]

also Finn, Poe, and Rose should've been there too, and the old lady would ask all of them for their full names, and Finn would look over at Poe and say "Finn Dameron."

[@wyrmh0le]

@@ce7.0 Poe: Ugh, dude! We weren't going to tell them yet!

[@annamiller1727]

"Just Rey" "Just Rey?" "Just Rey"

[@davidv4018]

I am Rey Resistance.

[@ModernModr]

@@ce7.0 but right before Finn says Dameron, Rose body checks him out to f the way.

[@vuongquocao]

"I'm Rey" "Rey who?" **sees the ghosts of the twins** "Rey Lukenleia"

[@Dilopho]

omg lol amazing comment

[@shiverian5970]

@@Dilopho I mean he stole it from the new Rockstars video soooooo

[@narata1541]

Gross. Saying it out loud, it sounds like "Luke in Leia." They are siblings! Ahhhh!!!

[@sassyevilgoat]

Time for some Alabama jam!

[@natapy]

Remember when people would make those couple Facebook accounts? THIS? Yes.

[@cmw12]

Shocking how movies turn out badly when you do the filming first and the writing second… or never.

[@Persephone_Personified]

Palpatine announcement was on MySpace. He’s a real hip daddio.

[@NerdsBehavingBadly]

Also I love how all of Palpatine's lines are basically different versions of lines he's said in other movies

[@sernoddicusthegallant6986]

@@HOTD108_ And people say that the disney trilogy goes against Lucas' vision

[@gastronomist]

"Something something something Dark Side! Something something something complete!"

[@davidv4018]

And he is the actor who didn't die.

[@davidv4018]

@@gastronomist do it!

[@jp-47471]

You look like Rose.

[@ahoihoi87]

I love that Finn doesn't know which ship out of two Chewie is on but his gut feeling tells him exactly which Star Destroyer out of a hundred thousand carries the beacon.

[@zoltanszaszi2264]

Well it's fortunate that the star destroyers patiently waited out the moment when he diacovers that ability in himself - And that Palpatine's power enabled him to raise like a thousand warships out of the ocean simultaneously without effort but his force range ended at somewhere in the lower atmosphere, from which point on, the star destroyers needed a beacon to know which way was "up". And that Palp's tech was advanced enough to grow force sensitive puppet dark lords, but not so much that he could build in an autopilot function into his star destroyers that would have made them, in the absence of further commands, simply move away from the pull of the gravity well.

[@ibtrippen]

I love that Palpatine (does he have a first name or is he from before the invention of first names?) didn't just force-push the fleet all the way into orbit and left it vulnerable instead.

[@zoltanszaszi2264]

@@ibtrippen It was also very thoughtful of him to halt the ascent low enough so that there still was enough oxygen and atmospheric pressure for ground forces to be able to land and ride horses on the star cruisers. Such a gentleman, he really cares about sportsmanship.

[@dw1419]

@@ibtrippen Palpatine's first name is Sheev, believe it or not.

[@ibtrippen]

@@dw1419 Wow. That's right up there with the fat dude being named "Porkins."

[@dwaiting883]

The Rise of Skywalker feels like a Zach Snyder movie. Things happened but you felt none of it.

[@Alucard-A-La-Carte]

"It doesn't matter that she blew up a ship full of prisoners because none of them were named characters" might be THE MOST Star Wars thing in this entire movie.

[@unseenabyss2824]

Fin: "Rey! Rey! Rey! I never told you-" And then he never did.

[@bwtrader]

It’s a story for another time....

[@myettechase]

(John Mulaney voice) And then I *didn’t*

[@wirelesmike73]

He was like Stewie Griffin from Family Guy. - "Mom... Mom... MOM... Mommy... Mommy... Mama... MAMA... Ma... MA..."

[@F1rstWorldNomaD]

This made me laugh more than it should have 🤣

[@helenline1790]

A good question....😑

[@turquoisecrow4513]

“I’m Rey” “Rey who?” *dramatic pause* “Rey dimmadome, owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome”

[@jacklattimore5966]

TurquoiseCrow and this is my son Ben Dimmadome heir time the Doug dimsdale dimmadome fortune

[@Xenlavian]

The same Rey Dimmadome owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome where they're selling Crash Nebula on Ice?

[@misterbadguy7325]

@@Xenlavian That's right!

[@noalowenstein6741]

man the ending of this video always gets me. there's nothing more heartbreaking than taking the passion out of a fan

[@alice88wa]

Yeah that line about being made to feel dumb for having been excited is like a punch to the gut. And I just realized that her 'first' Star Wars Land video came out before this movie and there's been no update since. I genuinely wonder if the absolute disappointment of this movie basically took the wind out of her sails.

[@davidbowles7281]

@@alice88wa There's nothing left to say about Star Wars. The prequels were bad, this stuff is even worse arguably. So it hasn't been good since 1983 for me.

[@la_scrittice_vita]

I wonder how many people who love this channel feel that way about the OG fans who object to the lore breaking dumpster fire that is Disney Star Wars as a whole.