Lewis Black | 11/2/19 San Diego CA: Recycling

Alison Patton lives in California and does everything she can to be kind to the planet. She drives a Tesla, installed solar panels on her house, and is diligent about recycling. The problem? CVS receipts.
Submit rants to Lewis: www.lewisblack...
Tour & ticket info: www.lewisblack...
#LewisBlack #Recycling #CVSReceipts #SanDiego

[@JerrySmith-ih9rd]

Thank God someone is bringing the ridiculous CVS receipts to light. It’s like walking away with a book that I didn’t pay for.

[@downhomesunset]

We get that with Safeway too-buy four items. No coupons. Just a foot of paper for each item!!!!

[@rowynnecrowley1689]

That would be fine if it was a book you wanted.

[@HansDelbruck53]

No, thank Lewis.

[@Tryo707]

I love Lewis so much when he makes himself laugh. It's just the best.

[@veranet99]

You wrote every word I intended to. ❤

[@meanmrmustang]

You can be having the worst day of your life, and Lewis can bring a smile to your face.

[@mikeymcmikeface5599]

Is this supposed to be comedy? It's not at all funny. This is terrible!

[@Tryo707]

@@mikeymcmikeface5599 You were free to leave the whole time. No need to stick around and comment on something you don't enjoy.

[@XMetalChefX]

When he laughs at the strangling part he is so overjoyed. I crack up.

[@Zenologia4673]

Did you know the approximate distance between earth and the sun is 8 CVS receipts ?

[@KJ99otis]

ZenoTech Tutorials - Best comment ‘o the day! 🤣

[@dmgreenberg]

In other words, one light minute equals the length of one CVS receipt.

[@silverpurkat]

😂

[@hachi666roku]

Only during Summer solstice... during Winter Solstice, its 10

[@m.k.c.5212]

ROFLMAO - Thank you! 🤣💋👍

[@DonnaSnyder]

You are the funniest person under the sun. I just laughed so much, so hard, and for so long that I upset my dog and peed myself. And I have Major Depressive Disorder! (I can go days, if not weeks, without laughing.) Thank you, Mr. Black. You're a gift. 💕💕💕

[@racheln8563]

Lewis, hire her immediately as a joke writer.

[@mrpicky1868]

usualy ppl have maybe one or two in them, so its a long shot. and ppl are happy that its vented into the world. but if someone could keep em going then yes

[@racheln8563]

Dmytro Picky Well, I meant that as a joke, but Lewis couldn’t have done better if he’d hired a professional. That was hilarious, and his delivery really sold it.

[@lisalutterbach6843]

Before he hires her he might want to check out a 2014 routine by Rod-man. Look up CVS comedian and it will come up.

[@spaceo8568]

This is one of the best rants I've ever heard. Lewis Black almost had a stroke from laughter.

[@thehellyousay]

Whoever wrote that is fucking hilarious

[@maggierezac5820]

@@thehellyousay Greetings Internet friend! We meet again, so that means we both have good taste in content? I do have a special place in my heart for Lewis Black. Attending one of his shows with all 3 of my siblings in 2010? was the last time we were all together... until my big brother's funeral... To the OP here, I oft worry about Lewis' Blood Pressure as well! Yes, I am that person who recycles the cardboard rolls from the toilet paper! Guilty! 🤣😂☮✌😎

[@gmaneis]

@@maggierezac5820 I used to recycle those, and cereal boxes, until a guy at the recycling place told me "We don't accept those. It's not cardboard. It's chip board. We don't take chipboard." Sheesh!!!!!

[@maggierezac5820]

@@gmaneis Oh yeah, I know all too well about the "chipboard"! I have had to curtail my recycling in the past few months because an edict came down from above that they don't accept plastic bags? As a former garbage hauler {pre-recycling mandates} I enjoy the goodness of the plastic bags to contain nasty things! I am so perplexed. Perhaps if I fill the thing with LOOSE shredded paper? On a windy day?😏💨💨💨

[@joannpriepke7938]

Add to bucket list : write a letter to Lewis Black worthy of his laughter.

[@polarfroge]

LB rants are only eclipsed by his laughter. Audible awesomeness.

[@jeffmullins1286]

How do we submit a rant to him

[@Vansbaseball]

@@jeffmullins1286 I was wondering the same thing

[@jeffmullins1286]

@@Vansbaseball I subscribed to his website and sent one, but idk if he reads them

[@JerKur18]

I've never seen him laugh before. I never knew I needed that lol.

[@dd317]

The man is insane, I tell you he's stark raving mad!! I especially like when he starts waving his finger at the audience and stutters as if he's about the pass a kidney stone. I think, oh no here it comes, get ready, and bam! He doesn't disappoint. A devoted fan.

[@thurney4343]

No DD...the world is insane and Lewis is just reminding us of that fact. Cheers!

[@MrNASCARFAN2009]

As someone who stutters as a result of an injury at Birth and not passing a kidney stone...fuck you asshole! Now how insane is that?

[@cubey]

Collect the wadded up receipts in a big box with decorative wrapping paper and mail it to CVS corporate.

[@MarkLLawrence]

It'd only take about 3 to fill a large box 😉

[@washo2222]

Perfect idea!!!!! I think I'll start doing that next year as part of my New Year Resolution.

[@marirose756]

That’s brilliant! They’ll probably call in bomb squad tho

[@stevendoran877]

so they can throw it in the trash

[@heatherellner4197]

As a former CVS employee, I can attest that the people who run the company KNOW that people hate the receipts, and they just don't care.

[@poohbeartube]

Ah corporate America. Your call is important to us, the customer is our #1 priority, the focus is on you, etc.

[@dd317]

In a moment of dire economic crisis I grabbed a bunch and used them to wipe my ass. But it was just once.

[@jonathanw1019]

@@poohbeartube It's pretty clear that there are more people who use the coupons on the reg. than there are those who complain about it. Corps that are successful don't just throw money away. They're giving long receipts because enough people use them to make it a profitable decision.

[@poohbeartube]

@@jonathanw1019 "It's pretty clear that there are more people who use the coupons on the reg. than there are those who complain about it." I do not believe most (if any) corporations quantify complaints vs coupon usage. The decision to use coupons is based more on overall sales figures. Of course it is cost effective/profitable. So is placing milk and eggs on the opposite corner of a grocery store and many other tactics employed by retail organizations. "Corps that are successful don't just throw money away." Of course they don't, but they waste money in many ways.

[@lilbatz]

Cerebral Vascular Stroke has no fucks to give about their employees or customers.

[@andhisband]

I've been saving CVS receipts for years now. I'm making a noose to send to the CEO.

[@evilsharkey8954]

andhisband, so you must have visited CVS, what, twice in that time to get enough paper for a noose?

[@142857ing]

Love that Lewis acknowledges the "working intelligence" of people like Allison at the end of this - but his cracking up says it all!

[@pneulancer]

Not sure I would presume her to be intelligent. More likely simply derivative and reactionary, self -righteous, sanctimonious and lest I forget, obnoxious!

[@benwoodard6851]

@@pneulancer I feel sorry for you. Seek joy.

[@Munenushi]

I love that he insulted you all and you don't even see

[@BeeKeeper37]

I was just tickled at how Louis black was enjoying himself at someone’s fellow rant… He is such a true treasure.

[@Tasarran]

It was a truly inspired rant, though, wasn't it?

[@lisagulick4144]

I loved how he couldn't stop laughing as he was reading!

[@mark-j-adderley]

...it’s not just the wonderful writing, it’s the interpretation, the personal involvement of Mr. Black and his delicate musicality which puts the icing/frosting on the cake. 🧁 5:35

[@michellerobinson5061]

He is the vessel that allows those hidden writing talents, to be shared with the rest of us. Thank you Lewis!

[@Munenushi]

I love that he insulted you all and you don't even see

[@gavriloking5637]

it’s this awesome combination of laughing at her and with her. the way Lewis reads the story is of course awesome 👏🏻

[@dumaskhan]

he made it through that incredible story. For a second i thought he'd pass out from suppressing his laughter.

[@toobasaurus23]

Never heard Lewis laugh so hard.

[@RTKdarling]

His delivery is so entertaining that he doesn't have to write his own material. Lewis Black is a Mutherfucking Legend

[@polijunk2]

He should have brought the woman who wrote it onstage. hilarious. she should be employed as one of his writers!

[@carolynworthington8996]

Sam McClain She sure has his “voice” down pat!

[@jaybee6701]

This entire thing may be the best thing to ever cross my ears.

[@HSMiyamoto]

Lewis Black kind of reminds me of the "Mad as Hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore" guy in the movie "Network."

[@mlfeathers7527]

Peter Finch.

[@HSMiyamoto]

@@mlfeathers7527 Thanks, I wasn't going to look it up, since the performance is so famous.

[@lisagulick4144]

His name was Howard Beale in the movie. Come to think of it, Lewis kind of looks like that...muss his hair and put him in that trench coat, and you have the seeds of a remake!

[@brianknapp6215]

"I snapped at my husband!!!" Priceless.

[@Gloria-ww2gi]

Lewis always makes my day. His delivery to the letter was perfectly done!

[@larrygardner2756]

Imagine my disbelief when my boss informed me that our cleanroom paper shouldn't go into our recycle because of the coating they put on it to make it cleanroom compatible.. Tons....literally tons/year. I snapped at my partner, too.

[@jkbjkb8899]

I have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. Thanks, the Impeachment Trial was getting to me.

[@barbarabastron6152]

Couldn’t agree More about CVS receipts!

[@rogerk2049]

Ck the website, opt for email receipts.

[@johnmartinez7440]

That's A cool story!

[@SuperScottCrawford]

The biggest mistake is going into that store in the first place.

[@howardwayne3974]

My wife had a bad vehicle accident years ago and left her with short term memory loss . plus she was on some high powered pain meds which left her confused at times . I made her promise to never go anywhere without me . well , she wanted to go to CVS one fine date , so I drove her up there and she went in to get what she wanted and I stayed in the car 'cause of all the sickies in there . I was listening to the game on the radio and after a while I noticed she had had been in there a while . and I mean a looooong while . just for 1or 2 things she said . then I remembered about her memory and went to find her . there she was wandering up one aisle and down another holding her two items just as contented as could be . I walked up to her and asked her if she needed anything else and if not could we go ? She said " I just got in here what do you mean go ? " I told her " honey , you've been in here almost two hours " . she didn't believe me , so I went and got a nearby clerk who knew her and asked him to verify what I'd just said . when she did , my poor wife started to cry her eyes out , and stopped when the clerk came back with a receipt as long as my leg for only the two items she had and the she laughed her head off all the way home ! She eventually get off those pain meds and is a LOT better now . she still has some memory loss , but not nearly as bad . it's like a private joke between her and that fantastic clerk at CVS and they giggle like a couple of kids when they see each other now .

[@m.k.c.5212]

They are crazy overpriced.

[@DaiyenCairo]

@@howardwayne3974 I am thankful that your wife and you are doing better. May you both be healthy and thriving. Also glad, your wife has a someone to laugh with. Much love and respect to both of you and your family!

[@TheArt0053]

I love that Lewis seems to be enjoying the show as much as everyone else!

[@Thaligamathor]

That CVS stuff is all true. I thought I was the only one...

[@cwaccwac9323]

Worthless receipts.

[@purplatypus7405]

For basically my whole life I've been ranting about how long receipts are and it warms my heart that I am not alone

[@ThomasLeonard454]

Lewis as always you are so spot on with your comedy even when it comes from your audience. Truth in the American way.

[@thegreatscode]

Well I hope someone tells her that in order to get all the lithium in her Tesla they have to destroy nature and poison the waters in the areas they dig and burn a lot of coal.

[@jameswilliamjohnson]

There is no free lunch. High tech impacts the environment because of the metals and materials needed.

[@PeterCombs]

one of the funniest bits I've heard in quite a while..priceless.

[@rittherugger160]

This is why I love Louis so much. I know that this is not his own "rant". What he has done is to create a sense of trust with his audience. This combined with his eye for a good "essay" has made him into the voice of America's Everyman.

[@punklejunk]

Lewis delivered that letter perfectly, like it was meant for him to read out loud. Her writing style is a perfect fit for Mr. Black.

[@thecanaryisdead4745]

LOVE Lewis black... Would like him as president. Hell yeah!

[@TerryB751]

Yeah, I think we can all relate to getting 5 feet of CVS receipts whenever we go in to buy something like a tube of toothpaste. It's always for the stuff you just bought and the receipt expires in 7 days.

[@tjmctube]

There's at least one website that chronicles these ridiculous receipts.

[@maggierezac5820]

@Tim McDowell, thank you for that head's up & full disclosure, I've never shopped at CVS, but apparently many have & bring out the memes galore! I also found a way to 'bypass' this nonsense. Don't use a membership card or loyalty or whatever they do to track your every move! And now we know! Peace!

[@HomeSkillit]

Normally they ask you if you'd rather email receipt 😅🤣😂😁

[@mr7wi]

That is one of the funniest things I’ve heard

[@iamanomas]

This is a great rant.

[@unreliablememory9687]

@Watching TrainsgoBy Anyone who can ever type the words "eco-fascist" is clearly unaware of the world around him, but hey, enjoy your flat earth, anti-vax bubble while you can.

[@jupitercyclops6521]

It's funny because cancer causing plastics are found in seafood that we eat.

[@cinfirefly3058]

Lewis, you are my Spirit Animal... much love to Mom & Dad....

[@ju_mappelle_le_blu_sacre]

Damn near killed lewis on this one lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@wim0104]

reduce your carbon footprint by not using CVS, that waste of space.

[@MrBamboobanga]

@G F same same. 🤣

[@LiveMusicOntario]

The woman who wrote that probably has arteries popping out of her neck, seeing two bottled waters on the stool next to Lewis.

[@pamelacass9642]

I don't know why. I reuse my water bottles over and over again, so why wouldn't Lewis?

[@Hithere-ek4qt]

Who still shops at CVS? They are the WORST, any not just because of the receipts. Way overpriced on everything.

[@Leftyotism]

And by overpriced you mean that at the othr end of the chain were not enough people fucked over financially? Because that is how "abstract" it is.

[@kathiaking7287]

Hi there I shop at CVS and loved it!!!

[@edmullins4519]

You people do know you have the option to have the receipt emailed? Crap like this spreads like wildfire and is the reason so many companies go under. These tree hugging idiots are gonna be the demise of what’s left of this once great country! Before long we all will be Jeff Bazos’ bitch because all the brick and mortar stores will be gone!

[@johnmartinez7440]

@@edmullins4519 You could've had a good point if it wasn't for the "tree-hugging idiots" part.

[@stelios-1821]

I am still waiting for the joke. People who think they will save the earth because they recycle are delusional.

[@evilsharkey8954]

The joke is about CVS producing an enormous receipt that, in adding insult to injury, isn’t even recyclable.

[@stelios-1821]

@J Dial I have watched, listen and read everything Lewis Black did in his life and I love this guy. That wasnt funny for me and it was for you. No big deal.

[@NewMessage]

CVS is just trying to help you reduce your toilet paper costs.. by supplying a few feet for free.

[@maggierezac5820]

@New Message! Thank you for that giggle! I was just chatting about the weirdness of myself in that I do recycle the cardboard tube of the inexpensive toilet paper! I plead guilty as charged! Peace! ☮✌😎

[@paulkolodner2445]

Don't rub that stuff against your ass. You'll grow a new putrefying body part that you don't need either.

[@jv-lk7bc]

...to give you rectal cancer.

[@scrumtrellecent]

are you Nostradamus ?

[@terrysullivan1992]

What is really ironically funny here is that he doesn't have to write his own material anymore.

[@Historian212]

The fans' rants are only tacked on after he does his show.

[@henrysmith9725]

I was at this show. This was after an hour long set.

[@shabutir1820]

Wait until this person finds out that the recycling goes to the same place as the trash haha.

[@slewone4905]

that's because China refuse to accept our recyclables. It's because our paper waste is too contaminated, evidently by cvs receipts.

[@robbiepoulin920]

This is hands down a true statement. At least 80% and the number is going up every year.

[@johnmartinez7440]

It doesn't tho

[@98triffid]

@@slewone4905 Where exactly did you think it went once it GOT to China anyway? If it's just getting burned. It makes no sense at all shipping it halfway across the world in order to do that. Mexico is much closer.

[@lisagulick4144]

We need to stop being so lazy and learn to reduce and reuse our own trash. There are lots of ways to do that, like using your old tires as planters, newspapers as weed block and cardboard as a catcher for paint spills. An empty plastic bottle can be sewn into a cloth bag and used as a cheap pet toy (supervised, but that goes for *any* toy). Most metals are worth money, especially copper, aluminum, and scrap steel; you might not get much, but it will get melted down and reused for something. Colored glass can be broken and used to make a mosaic - glue it to an old end table top with tile glue, fill the cracks with grout, then shellac the surface to protect it. This is just a short list. Pinterest could give you more ideas. And hey, with the quarantine, now's the time to get crafty, right?

[@prmicrotech]

Love You Lewis and the woman who sent that in - Love her too...

[@Leftyotism]

Or him. : >

[@prtechguy7192]

@@Leftyotism He said it was a woman, but everyone gets the actual point. Love LB, have to see him live. It's a huge priority for me...

[@Leftyotism]

I don't remember hearing that. ^.^

[@prtechguy7192]

@@Leftyotism Damn, this may turn into a rant I'll have to send Mr. Black...

[@prtechguy7192]

"Allison.. She's here tonight..."

[@barkerapts6550]

This rivals, if not surpasses, peanut butter rant.

[@MZTHICK76]

@Damian 2000The pickle rant had me in tears🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@nexthursday2424]

I keep the peanut butter rant in my hall of fame of supreme laughter, close second was the “how are you enjoying your stay at home home vacation?”, but this.. man, this is the stuff of podia. just read there’s a glorious pickle rant too, so you know I’m topping this with a bang.

[@barkerapts6550]

I completely forgot about the pickle rant. The nervous pills had me in stitches.

[@LemonadeDivorce]

The peanut butter rant and pickle rant killed me too. Love both of those.

[@barkerapts6550]

I had forgotten about the vacation. What a classic

[@deuddersun]

Hire that woman, Lewis! 🤣👍🏻

[@kristinajakakas9068]

I love Lewis and this new act thing,,,, 😏I'm not sold its "actual fans" writing these rants honestly... 😋😁But I totally dig this

[@LemonadeDivorce]

It's real. I wrote it. Have sent him 3 others the past 3 years and he's read them at his shows too. And my teen daughter sent him one and he read it at his Washington DC show last year. If you go online to Lewis Live, you can submit a rant.

[@psychedelicyeti6053]

@@LemonadeDivorce when life gives you lemons, rant to Lewis Black 😝

[@spmartin]

My suspicion is that he writes the supposed letters. They are all written in his style. If I am right, it is a clever comedy technique!!

[@JimAllen-Persona]

Steve Martin well, he makes no bones about “punching up” the rants. But you know the stories come from the people. He has too many details in the story to have invented them.

[@shapirowrites]

I personally know the woman who wrote this and it's her voice so no Lewis didn't writer this, but I guess you complimenting Alison in an elliptical way. Black's delivery adds to the humor but the words are Alison's (one L not two).

[@JimAllen-Persona]

shapirowrites sounds like a smart, fun person !!! 😂😂

[@LemonadeDivorce]

It's real. I wrote it. (He's read onstage 3 other rants I sent him through the years and he read one my teenage daughter wrote. Go to Lewis Live to submit a rant.)

[@LemonadeDivorce]

@@snopinkuro8899 thank you for the info!! and for the complimentary words too. Glad you enjoyed the rant. It was a ton of fun writing it and Lewis did an incredible job with it.

[@illbeyourmonster1959]

I shall burn a tire, a 400# tractor tire, in this envio fuckwits honor. Who's with me? :P

[@pixpusher]

Can we all email this video link to the Management team at CVS?

[@matthewhoffman9788]

What a great show in a intimate small theater setting. Lewis Black nailed it!

[@m.k.c.5212]

Lewis is laughing so hard he can hardly make it thru this rant. Priceless.

[@crbrearley]

I can't believe someone topped the Mormon rant! This was absolutely unbelievable. Lewis was crying!

[@mbdieter7308]

thank you for keeping this up. I can't always watch the lives and love to hear Lewis even for a smidge at the end of his shows.

[@johnprendergast1338]

Recycling should happen to California before it caves in …..Black is a funny guy in a dire time …..Laughing all the way..)))

[@maxxsrv10]

I haven't laughed this hard in a long time! This letter is better than the one about chunky peanut butter and that was funny as well!

[@filz4461]

Right man! Chunky is second now, milk is third.

[@m.k.c.5212]

I can only imagine the catharsis the folks who send in these rants experience. 🤣🤣🤣🤣👌👏💕

[@ElRegulus]

But... you CAN send your CVS receipts to your e-mail, and also coupons to your CVS card... 🤔 I did it years ago. Agreed about the coupon expiration dates... it's ridiculous... and unfortunately, other places are guilty of this too.

[@justsaying3729]

I agree. It's ridiculous the way CVS give those long ass receipts & I also let them expire. Not enough time.

[@michaelmitchell5380]

I LOVE THIS MAN!! He should receive the Nobel Prize for EVERYTHING! He comes from a long line of wise-fools who spoke truth to power and sometimes paid for it with their lives. Do we REALLY understand how fortunate (blessed) we are to have Lewis Black?! God bless him for truly showing us "what fools we mortals be".

[@jeffs6090]

I actually went into CVS with a strategy. Knowing that I'll be getting a 54" receipt, knowing that I can use all the coupons in one purchase, knowing that all the coupons on it expire in a week, knowing that I won't need any of those items in that time period if I purchased them all before the receipt printing marathon, knowing that I won't even be back into CVS for another month (because you know, I like most people only go there once a month to get my prescriptions).... I bought one little item that is never on the mile and a half receipt, a bag of candy. I then proceeded to do my regular shopping. Luckily, I was able to use most of the coupons because by using my card all the time, they know what I typically purchase. I bought what I would normally get and saved almost $90 with the coupons when checking out at the pharmacy with my meds.

[@garryferrington811]

Hey, that's a good idea!

[@johndifrancisco3642]

It's about time that came up. Those CVS receipts piss me off to no end! And I've NEVER seen a coupon that lasted a month. A week tops but usually a few days.

[@terr777]

40 downvotes? I just had an abs workout I laughed so hard.

[@ton3016]

If I work a register, I always print a receipt to verify the credit card went thru. Because one time it didnt, and I had to pay for someone's $20 breakfast habits and gas. because thier credit card never went thru and they rushed out the door before realizing what happened, Boy this woman would hate me xD.

[@emeltea33]

@@jamespfitz I choose paper over plastic. It's a renewable resource.

[@chrisamerriman]

I think people are missing the whole point of why Lewis is really laughing. Hint: It’s not about CVS, or anything they do.

[@gregoryfahy]

I was getting ready to write a one page explanation of the joke, then I decided why bother.

[@chrisamerriman]

Gregory Fahy Yeah, that’s why I decided against it...

[@RIXRADvidz]

I love how bent out of shape everyone gets over recycling. we have to actually think about what we're doing with our waste, reusing or filling landfills. if you took my hint, you could let solar/wind powered robots recycle everything at the landfills and mine landfills for resources, but you've taken it upon yourselves, ego

[@robynsineadsheppard6480]

"Yes, I'm ecologically aware. That's why I bought a Tesla, so I can pretend I'm saving the planet by not using polluting petroleum products. Instead, I'm using electricity...generated by coal-fired power plants."

[@henrysmith9725]

I was there last week. Awesome show!

[@TheBlackWidow67]

The way the light was hitting the bottles. I thought he was sipping NyQuil. “It makes a dandy eggnog”

[@shelbie68]

This is hilarious...but my CVS receipts are emailed. 🤔

[@suedamato8080]

Shelbie You can set that option up on your CVS card. I don’t receive any paper receipts.

[@shelbie68]

Yup - though I’m glad she hadn’t figured that out yet bc her rant was too funny!😂

[@cathleenbaldwinmaggi2252]

Ummm... CVS gives you the option of an emailed receipt. I wish every company offered that option.

[@cathleenbaldwinmaggi2252]

@J I have never received spam from them. When I walk in the store they send me notifications to my text (because I requested them) of sale items that I usually shop for. CVS is truly the best app out there for stores.

[@jayl7920]

"...I snapped at my Husband.." Aw, man-! poor guy didn't hav a clue nor a chance..! Feel 4 ya, Bruh...

[@Sunset553]

She could get her toiletries from many other stores that have regular receipts.

[@Tryo707]

Perhaps, I have lived two separate places that only have one option for shopping. She could be in such a town.

[@drjny]

If you don't provide your loyalty card information, the receipt won't have all the extra coupons.

[@Gkuljian]

What really pisses me off are environmentally conscious zealots who have 3 kids.

[@jamiebutler1762]

Yep, overpopulation is the main cause of the environmental and climate destruction.

[@MrDino1953]

Well, recycle them. I'm sure there's a color-coded bin for it.

[@telisijohn2054]

@@MrDino1953 lol

[@upperleftcoastchelseafan7718]

Lesson learned, don't drink morning coffee in bed while watching Lewis, I just spit coffee everywhere I was laughing so 'god-damned' hard!

[@janetsavoy6677]

Omg I absolutely love Lewis Black.I'm employed in the Healthcare industry and when I get so fckng overwhelmed with all of the coronavirus bullshit..I watch Lewis's videos.and I laugh my ass off..Thank you and God Bless you Lewis .keep posting your videos.

[@KashiusFresco]

I thought I was the only one that noticed these long ass receipts from CVS! The president of the company must be a climate change denier 😂

[@rodneyharris3245]

I laughed so hard, Lewis Black is absolutely hands down my favorite observer of culture, then I got interrupted by a pro Trump commercial

[@joystickricksherrell774]

Your Starbucks is delivered, roasted and brewed via fossil fuels...that is all.

[@THEMamaVicky]

Alison and I almost have to be related.

[@scooby45247]

SPOT ON ALLISON PATTON, SPOT ON..

[@srwapo]

I hope they know that most recycling in the US is taken to the dump. We send recycling to China on boats for processing, but they don't wanna do that anymore, so the companies usually just dump it.

[@evilsharkey8954]

srwapo, people got so used to dumping all kinds of contaminated crap in there that they refuse to take any effort to sort or clean their shit and produce a viable recycling stream. The number one reaction I got to informing people that such and such item is not recycled by our local company is righteous indignation, as if it’s their right to dump whatever shit they think is theoretically recyclable since they pay some trash fee for it.

[@evilsharkey8954]

Ploop Ploopploopboop, aaaand there’s the righteous indignation. If you’re too stupid or lazy to learn your local company’s recycling guidelines, then don’t recycle anything except soda cans and beer bottles. You’re probably making the waste stream worse. Other countries have managed to get their people to sort their shit, and they actually import waste because their systems are so effective. It’s insulting to Americans to assume we’re all too lazy and stupid to ever learn. Assuming that recycling companies are going to spend a fortune having people hand sort every scrap of dirty plastic by type and then clean it is ridiculous. That’s why we sent it all to Southeast Asia to have their poorest people sort out the useable stuff and dump the rest. They’re not taking it anymore, so we have to change our habits if we want to continue recycling.

[@OLDMANDOM42.Dominic]

Well written indeed!!! And yes I am a husband so in this case it would be MY FAULT!! LOL

[@Tryo707]

It was your fault before it happened. Now get offline and back to your chores!

[@carlsoc1]

I'm happy that some stores ask if I want a receipt. Not many, but some.

[@colinsdad1]

Him cracking up, to the point where he's crying, makes this the best Rant I've seen from him yet!

[@denisecarpenter2981]

You know CVS will email you your receipt. 😂😂😂. But this is the best rant ever. I’ve listened to it several times. His delivery is perfection.

[@reubenmarchant2229]

Alaska Airlines took over ten years of comediennes making jokes about Charles Manson Airlines because to the image on the tail fin.

[@kerrypence4201]

Love… Love… Love this man!!

[@Tulipsaki]

Go to Walgreens. I go there because of CVS receipts. Or order from Amazon. Or order from CVS online.

[@accuratealloys]

Don’t go to CVS then.

[@Brace67]

So funny and so true. So much real humor in what he reads and his comment about the stories he receives and their quality I found very interesting.

[@stevencoffman34]

Lewis speaks the truth

[@cmdraftbrn]

if you think cvs is bad, wait til you hit k-mart.

[@mysticm1736]

cmdraftbrn if you can find one lol

[@cmdraftbrn]

@@mysticm1736 they're still around. they aint dead yet.

[@mysticm1736]

cmdraftbrn I’m sure I seen one or two around states I been too, all the ones near me shut down.

[@philrabe910]

OMG! This has to be the funniest Lewis Black www teasers I've ever seen! What perfect timing! The bleakness of this "alternate" existence had almost consumed me.