I'm Infertile But My Wife Told Me She's Pregnant, Now I'm Questioning Everything r/Relationships

[@Tijggie82]

"to give him credit, he did stop verbally abusing me and comforted me after he made me cry".... low bar my dear, low bar.

[@crem-crem4070]

In all honesty if my SO was told he had a blockage and I got pregnant I would 100% be understanding because we’ve been told it’s not possible, the concern of cheating is more statistically valid to than the miracle swimmer.

[@justinjones-smith5168]

Exactly

[@pansprayers]

My husband had 'miracle swimmers' SIX times, lol (seven if you count the High School ex), and has a blockage we've had to have operated THREE times because they can be quite painful if they're bad enough. Rather than turning it directly onto the partner, we need to start demanding that Urologists actually EXPLAIN the condition better than, 'Well, you have a vericacile, you're never going to have kids', because again, as OP discovered, barring not having a vas deferense, that's simply not true. Start holding doctors accountable when they give this information out, because people are FAR too quick to accept their word as biblical.

[@robertx8020]

@@melodyharpole8272 Those two things a would accept as proof of you being honest , But if I would question your every move, and keep hinting that I thought you were a lying cheater, would there be a point for you to say "FF YOU"" ? Or would you at least say "get a second opinion" I have no issue with op being in doubt but whatever his wife said or did, he kept thinking "she might be cheating" The trustlevel is at 0!

[@benry007]

@@melodyharpole8272 if I was a woman that had a miracle child like that I would insist on getting a DNA test. Do you really want your husband to always be wondering?

[@pansprayers]

@@benry007 no, I want my husband to have a brain. 'Infertile' isn't 'sterile', and a dictionary would tell you that. If you're a paranoid f*ck throughout a pregnancy, and refuse to get a second or third opinion (like you're told you're supposed to), then that's on you. Don't put your insecurities and lack of education regarding your personal health on anyone but yourself, and expect to have a healthy relationship. If you're old enough to get married, you're old enough to do your own due diligence regarding something as basic as researching this very well researched topic, instead of making everyone around you a suspect.

[@sarasadler487]

Our "I can't get you pregnant" will be 19 in June... He's been such a blessing!!! Very Loved Young Man...

[@paden1865able]

Yeah, I was told the same thing. Mine are thirty and eighteen. 😆

[@ev342]

I’m the “I can’t pregnant” miracle kid. 18 this November wooooo!!

[@KCCAT5]

My sister's ,"I need help getting pregnant", Miracle, just graduated Police Academy LOL. Her last son was a surprise because she had infertility issues, need medical help with the first 2.

[@doyouliketacosiliketacos5139]

my "you'll never have children" will be 8 next month

[@CasualVFlowerEnjoyer]

Me and my sister are both 'miracle pregnancies'. I'm 25 and my sister is 16. She had me at 17 and the doctors later in life told her I was a miracle because she should be unable to have kids at all because her ovaries are all fucked up from cysts and clogged with scar tissue. We both also had to be bottle-fed because her milk ducts are sealed. Life threw a lot of obstacles at her but we turned out alright I think!

[@Streetwisefirst]

Story 1: I get why op would be confused or think possibly that the baby wouldn’t be his. He’s believing what the doctors said that he was completely infertile. I wish doctors would say that there is 1% you could still get someone pregnant. Majority of the time you cannot guarantee something by 100% as there’s always a possibly it might not work out that way

[@manxiefeathermoon9888]

Same here. Unless the man has no testicles or the woman has no ovaries, you still have a chance

[@brigidtheirish]

Exactly. And he's *not* infertile, he's just got a blockage. Blockages can have leaks. Hell, for all I know, frequent sex could be a *treatment* for azoospermia. Ever have a corn kernel stuck up your nose and gotten it out by blowing hard?

[@SidereusOfTheFallen]

Birth control being the first thing! And also protection. Nothing is 100% okay, safe or unsafe in life. It's what started the entire seatbelts debacle, and also the vaccination and medicine side effects one. The most used and recommended otc medication has killed at least one person, somewhere. It's just that the risk is worth it for fighting another, higher, risk, that is likely way more lethal or dangerous than that.

[@technicaldifficulties368]

Hell, I've had my fallopian tubes removed. It's incredibly rare, but there have been a few cases that people have STILL GOTTEN PREGNANT. Unless it's a hysterectomy they shouldn't say infertile. Just, incredibly unlikely

[@technicaldifficulties368]

@@SidereusOfTheFallen 300 people die a year in the US because of Tylenol

[@britneyragsdale4345]

I'd been told for 18 years that I'd never have kids and a few weeks after my 35th birthday, found out that I was pregnant. My baby is about to turn 2. 🥰

[@taetannim3581]

Congratulations!

[@nicolasv6031]

For story 1: Damn, OP's wife is stellar. Despite being anxious about pregnancy/work/life in general, she was able to assuage OP's rational and irrational fears openheartedly. Hope OP goes to some therapy for the resurfacing fears, and some couples counseling will probably do them both good after this, especially with the baby on the way!

[@robertx8020]

Right? A lot of ppl would get angry (even if they were not cheating) just because of all the trust issues Op's wife is a keeper :)

[@LokasennaCole]

The guy was told and believed he was infertile. His fears were literally the definition of rational

[@robertx8020]

@@LokasennaCole Maybe about the pregancy itself but not about all the things he say as 'proof'

[@wmdkitty]

She should have left his ass.

[@robertx8020]

@@wmdkitty Because being a single parent is so much better? :)

[@AndyyWithAY]

It is absolutely possible that OP could be the father. Proceed very cautious because if you accuse her of cheating that will look so bad

[@chialuenlis5931]

That's the implication from the smile.

[@pansprayers]

@@chialuenlis5931 the smile was likely confusion - just like some people laugh when they're uncomfortable. Because most people would be REALLY confused at that implication.

[@savanna8103]

there was another update and it was his

[@zerobolt9506]

@@savanna8103 I saw that one, I thought Mark read this already?

[@estepp79]

@@zerobolt9506 I've heard this before and ended up he was the dad.

[@squeakybb]

It's so refreshing to see two, healthy, communicating adults in a relationship working through a conflict together. 🖤🖤

[@musicallydisneyamvs6731]

I think the wife in the first story was an absolute sport in this. Good on her for staying firm, compassionate & understanding. Looks like their marriage will be alright as long as both work hard as they’re doing. This is what marriage is, work & choosing to love that person every day.

[@zerobolt9506]

Agreed

[@slytherinlibrarian3501]

Except that he's NOT doing any of the work. She is being compassionate, understanding, reassuring, and validating, offering him tests and an open phone and he's sitting back, admitting that he's shit at communicating, judging her on his lack of communication, and then shrugging and saying, "maybe we'll do counselling, I don't really believe in therapy." That's not working on it, that's putting both the burden of proof and the emotional labour of solving the sister on her. He's doing nothing to deal with his issues.

[@musicallydisneyamvs6731]

@@slytherinlibrarian3501 He did say that but knew it would help. Sometimes bad mental health can make someone stupidly hesitant. Especially with insecurities in a culture where guys are still raised in a toxic society, plus a bad ex can do some serious damage.

[@technicaldifficulties368]

@@slytherinlibrarian3501 He may mean that he doesn't think it will help HIM because he's so insecure about himself. As in such low self esteem he considers himself hopeless. Therapy may very well help his communication skills.

[@t.matthies3049]

@@slytherinlibrarian3501 He's doing what he can to communicate honestly and with kindness, and even if he's not crazy about the idea of therapy, he's still going (a lot of people wouldn't). These things take time to work on, and it's often a slow process. Being able to talk about feelings like OP's without being accusatory is actually a lot of work in and of itself, so I don't think it's fair to say she's doing all the work-OP is right that they have a really solid marriage, even if it has some hiccups from time to time (all marriages do-the best ones deal with it the way OP and his wife did).

[@TheRedowl101]

Damn the wife in story 1 was a total champ, just reassuring and open without getting hurt at OP's insecurities. He's got a real catch.

[@pansprayers]

This is why 'infertility' is such a loaded word. There are various degrees of it, and they're never *fully* explained in that 10 min sprint appointment (only about two minutes actually involve an actual face-to-face with an MD) that most think are their only option. Ask questions, even if it seems to annoy your doctor, people.

[@joaolima7131]

I think most people mix It with sterile, that means you have 0% chances of having kids, infertile is just a low chance not zero

[@pansprayers]

@@joaolima7131 unfortunately, even sterile is often a misdiagnosis. If you have the plumbing, there's always the chance of it happening.

[@joaolima7131]

@@pansprayers yeah, I heard before, doctors usually recommend men to masturbate after recovery to eliminate the alive spermatozoids but either way, a person have to be very lucky (or not) to have a child in this situations

[@brigidtheirish]

And doctors are *shit* at explaining stuff. His said that this was impossible? *Dude!* It's *blocked* tubes, not *missing!*

[@pansprayers]

@@brigidtheirish yup, my husband has had surgery for a more severe case of this very same thing three times (it can cause pain and swelling that made it almost impossible for him to sit down). Still didn't stop six pregnancies between us (even with my own out of control fertility issues), and one when he was in High School.

[@DarlingAshes]

Wife from story 1 is very patient and lovely! The amount of people in my life (men AND women) that were diagnosed as infertile but ended up having children is astounding! Including my mom, she was told there was absolutely NO way she would have children (meanwhile my dad is super fertile) and after 10 years…surprise! Me! Doctors need to explain to patients that ‘infertile’ doesn’t mean 100% just to avoid all these problems. I mean, sometimes it is cheating but from what I have seen from a lot of these Reddit stories, is that the partners are usually telling the truth. The fact that the wife immediately said she would take a paternity test would have told me everything! The fact that she is that certain. The cheating in his past definitely did a number on him and while he doesn’t like counselling, he definitely needs it. You need to be able to communicate well if you are going to be parents and he isn’t doing that.

[@LilySaintSin]

Exactly!

[@xevira]

Yep, there's a world of difference between being infertile and being _sterile._

[@faithfuljohn]

The irony is that in the medical community infertile NEVER means you can't have kids... just that it's very unlikely. It's still possible. Those who can NOT have kids (i.e. 0% chance) are not infertile... they are STERILE. Sterile is if you lose your testicles completely or are some kind of intersex individual.

[@DarlingAshes]

@@faithfuljohn Exactly!!! But so many seem to view it as the 'be all, end all' of no children ever so when a pregnancy occurs, a lot of negative drama can erupt from what is supposed to be a happy time. Whether that is from a misunderstanding or the medical personal not conveying this information properly or a mixture of the two. This misunderstanding causes so many problems and hurt.

[@CocoCece08]

Oddly enough, my mom was told at 16 she could never have children. 21 years later, guess who comes out. Me!

[@ladyofthelake93]

Just because the Dr says it's not possible doesn't mean it's not. My mom wasn't supposed to be able to have kids and then when she did get pregnant she was told she was miscarrying and they couldn't do anything to help. Yet I'm alive and well. Life is weird. And the human body can be amazing.

[@strawberrycowxo]

I was supposed to be a twin (other one never made it) and then she was told I'd be still born. I wasnt

[@gabriellemeche992]

Same as my aunt. She has a multitude of health issues. Now she has four kids and her health has gotten much better.

[@anonymouslee2083]

They’re technically not supposed to say it’s impossible, because if it turns out not to be true in a way that was bad for the patient, the patient can sue the doctor for damages caused by faulty medical counsel.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 2 was great. I'm glad OP got some self-esteem and exposed Jake. If he's this depraved at 19, I can't imagine him at 29 or 30. Yikes

[@manxiefeathermoon9888]

Story one: unless a man has no testicles and the woman has no ovaries, no one is 100% infertile. So many women got pregnant because they or their partner was told they are infertile and they didn't use protection.

[@jennilynne1977]

There was a Reddit story where a woman had a hysterectomy (for medical reasons) and in she told her boyfriend she was infertile ( she said there was no word for sterile in their language) and her boyfriend was pissed when she told him after 2 years that the reason she was infertile was because she had no uterus because her boyfriend was saving up money to pay for IVF or something similar.

[@manxiefeathermoon9888]

@@jennilynne1977 the type of infertility is "natural", like what OP was going through

[@jennilynne1977]

@@manxiefeathermoon9888 I understand that, I was just bringing up that occasionally it could be something due to language issues. The lady in the story was sterile, not infertile, but she claimed that there wasn't a word in her language to differentiate the two. In cases like that though, the person should be specific. In cases like the one in this video, the doctor should explain infertility and that it isn't 100%.

[@lisawhereisthecultjam]

I can relate.

[@stephanien6237]

😂😂😂

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

My sides hurt with laughter when Mark read out that it was Jake's Mum he was texting to - my own husband who was next to me when it was read out thought it was hilarious and said well played OP. (Husband listens to Mark because of me, lol, he's more of an ally waffle, lol)

[@aphelion4616]

So a pancake?

[@platinum_noelle]

My only response to the step-sibling in story 2 would be, "imagine having such low self-worth you're proud of being a revenge f*ck. Not even for cheating, just as an ego boost for someone who got dumped. You literally got the trash I already threw out, good job buddy! You clearly didn't fall far from the tree."

[@justaperson4656]

Story 2: BDSM and degradation kinks *have to be consensual,* if he's degrading you in a way that you aren't comfortable with or haven't consented to, it isn't degradation, *it is ABUSE*

[@muhname6052]

Story two: this is why you shouldn't explore the more emotional kinks until your mid to late twenties

[@philwill0123]

This, he was better at humiliation than he anticipated. Be careful what you wish for. He's 19 and wanted to be degraded and treated with respect by another 19 year old. he needs to mature and get therapy because hhe will find other relationships similar to this until he and future partner are more mature to deal with this.

[@BitterSimplicity]

Story 1: I love this so much. So many stories where the issue turns out to simply be a lack of communication involve anger, accusations, blowout fights that leave wounds that are more difficult to repair than the initial misunderstanding. OP never once got confrontational or accusatory, his wife never got defensive or angry. Although he needs to work on expressing his feelings better so they don't build up like that, these two have so much love and compassion for each other. Their relationship is a safe enough space to talk about difficult things, something that is a lot harder to achieve than you'd think. I'm happy for them.

[@ceridwen04]

I left the same comment in a similar story. As a woman, if I knew my husband was infertile and I got pregnant, I'd be the first to talk about going to the doctor and verify the situation, because I didn't cheat and I'd want to reassure my husband of it. I know trust is important but honestly, it's too much blind trust to expect from somebody else in a situation like that. Nobody was an AH in the story, but they should have both tackled the elephant in the room immediately. Thankfully they finally did and everything was alright.

[@fafnirray]

That was some hard core communication in the first story. Don't often see that, in stories like these. Made my heart feel a bit better.

[@ronaldfinkelstein6335]

story 1: Infertile does not mean sterile. But, it seems obvious that a paternity test may be in order. just to prove that OP is the father. Given that wife knows husband is infertile, she should at least, understand OP's doubts.

[@w7100]

you brought them up, she AGREED with how it looked, that is a huge red flag

[@colleencook382]

Hey Mark! I just listened to a story you did 2 years ago. Wow what an incredible difference! You have come a long way and your stories are so much better than 2 years ago. So much better with inflection, intonation and emotion. Just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate how much work you have put into your channel! Big hugs to you and belly rubs for Poppy!

[@MarkNarrations]

Wow, thank you!

[@Tam1064]

I noticed that too after accidently listening to an older story 🤷🏻‍♀️ … way to go Mark 😉

[@kyriacarica5862]

After my second miscarriage, my doc told me my chances of getting pregnant and carrying full term were slim. Husband and I considered ourselves "infertile" Lo and behold, a few months later I get pregnant. My son is now a year old. Infertile is such a loaded word. No one is 100% infertile unless you don't have all the "tools" lol. First OP is super lucky that his wife was mega patient of his issues. I understand his feelings but if something that happened years ago still effs with you this bad, you need to see someone for that most likely.

[@anon-iraq2655]

People confuse infertile and sterile

[@stilettosnthaghetto6997]

Thats not infertile he said slim

[@benry007]

My Grandma had 3 miscarriages before she and her husband decided to adopt. After she adopted my uncle she went on to give birth to 3 healthy children. She is 100 years old now and has lots of grandchildren and great grandchildren.

[@stephanien6237]

Infertile *usually* refers to inability getting pregnant not inability to carry a pregnancy to term. Different issues.

[@sylviajones6745]

Ya gotta admit, things looked kinda hinky on some things that were going on....

[@MizTameRumors]

2nd OP has a lot of trauma, I hope they feel empowered to fully heal...Men like Jake zone in on people like OP.

[@itazuranakisu]

Doctors should’ve been more clear and explain things instead of having patients walk out with the wrong idea (granted they can only do so much if the patient claims to understand). I think anyone who has been cheated on should go to therapy so they don’t bring that baggage into the next relationship. In this case OP nearly sabotaged a good relationship over an ex and was making his wife pay for another woman’s actions. He has to work on that on a personal level with his own therapist. Therapy isn’t a sign of weakness and can be very empowering and helpful.

[@Hevensdemonddm]

I am an "infertile" dad and mom on birth control baby. My bro is a birth control condom baby. No sex is the only 100%.

[@EveryDayALittleDeath]

Or being the same sex.

[@Hevensdemonddm]

@@EveryDayALittleDeath Ya, that too.

[@Hevensdemonddm]

@xBrandNeu 3 random dudes showed up at the birth. Also virgin births are a thing. Sperm gets spilt at the opening and follows the tube. It is rare but it happens.

[@pansprayers]

@xBrandNeu *snort* because it's completely beyond the scope of comprehension for you to think that a twelve year old Mary might have made that one up to avoid getting stoned?

[@mzgreenjeansapproves]

@xBrandNeu yeah but He's God not us, science applies to us

[@meezerluvr]

Story 1 - Yet another example of a doctor being 100% positive about something they were wrong about, and coming a hair's breadth from destroying somebody's life. This has a happy ending because OP's wife is an awesome woman who knows him well.

[@ineedhoez]

The doctor would not be responsible for destroying the person's life. The person would be. There are proper ways to handle things. You handle it like crap, you are going to get crap..

[@jesterbrown90]

Mark, I'm always up for a good revenge story. Doesn't even need to be about relationships.

[@Cheycartoongirl8]

Hi Waffle Gang! Home from work. Been up since 6am. Going to watch the video before taking a nap. Morning shift is the woooorst!! Hope your day/evening is going well!

[@Tiogair]

Wishing you the coziest of naps

[@Lou_sassel315]

Thank you waffle buddy! You have a wonder nap!

[@cybertheone3449]

Hope you enjoy/enjoyed the nap

[@AndyyWithAY]

Have to disagree evening/ night shift is the worst. I'd take a 6 a.m. shift over having to work til 10 pm or later every day of the week. But, everyone is different. Enjoy your nap

[@SmileyFace123Lolz]

Have a good nap, just got out of my evening class, it's 8 for me rn. These comments remind me of other commenters' time difference how interesting, lol!

[@jennilynne1977]

Husband came home from work and I followed him to drop off the car at mechanic. Took a few minutes to get it to start and stay that way. We got the car there. Hopefully it will get fixed. I hope everyone is having a great day/evening/night! Peace, hugs and love to everyone!

[@10awhite]

I remember this. I told him to double check his swimmers because my husband had been told his whole life he couldn't have kids, 3 kids determined that to be a lie

[@ineedhoez]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@sophiescott143]

Story 1: "Trust but verify" is good wisdom. The husband did his best with what he had, and the wife was understanding the whole way through. Impatient and irritated at times, but with good reason. This is how to handle conflict in a relationship: Open communication.

[@dixietenbroeck8717]

1st story: *"LIFE finds a way!"* Amazing, when you think about it. 👍🤗🖖

[@AndyyWithAY]

If the wife is cheating, she sure is bold. She's not the least bit concerned that she might be accused of cheating. I hope she didn't cheat and OP is actually not infertile

[@Girl-Supersonicboy]

He is the father.... its said in the video

[@pansprayers]

The urologist who told him/led him to believe he's entirely infertile based on a vericacile is incompetent and needs to be taken to task. My husband has a SEVERE one that's been operated on three times to address the pain and swelling it causes, and I STILL got pregnant six times. The urologist should have better explained that, as long as he has a vas deferense, there's always a chance of pregnancy.

[@joaolima7131]

Infertile and sterile aren't the same thing people.... Infertile people can still have kids, sterile not and no, sterile isn't just vasectomy or tying your tubes, there is a lot of factor that influence if a person might have just a low chance or zero chance of having kids

[@AndyyWithAY]

I post comments as I watch the video live, this was before that part of the video

[@technicaldifficulties368]

There are documented cases of women having their tubes removed and still getting pregnant. It's very rare, but not unheard of

[@claireadams6214]

My first husb called me barren when he finally left. I remarried and with in two years I had a beautiful baby girl!!

[@Jack-kx5rf]

Knew a guy that went through the same thing as the OP in story 1. He was told he was infertile, his wife got pregnant, doctors got it wrong and he was the father of the baby. Then a few months later he found out that his wife had actually been cheating on him the whole time.

[@AcedVidz]

😳

[@Tam1064]

oh no 😳

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

So many twists and turns. O⁠_⁠o That poor guy though.

[@reinventingmelissa2061]

I love prorevenge and survivinginfidelity and relationships. But I really, really like stories with updates, so you're my favorite!

[@damien678]

oh I haven't heard a prorevenge in ages, I hope mark does some

[@helenlewis2510]

Yeah, but her transferring half their money would seem sketchy

[@pansprayers]

Eh, I understand the why. I've had some financial department people who are the equivalent of used car sales people at the OB/GYN, and like to play the, 'if you do this, we'll knock X% off of the visits (up to about 5k), but only if you do it right NOW - isn't it more important that you save money for the baby?' The worst one was when they were trying to set up prenatal prepay, when I had a tortioned ovary with a cyst the size of a softball. I wasn't pregnant, was about to have an entire ovary removed before it went necrotic, but this AH was more interested in making her quota than looking at my chart. Never got an apology for that, only a sh*tty attitude when my husband called her out. US healthcare is the worst, and it's way more common than you'd think.

[@ergotempusvernum]

If I had moved a few thousand from a joint account with my partner he would have every right to suspect me of cheating. In fact, my partner doesn't have a cheating ex history, and he would still have every right to be pissed and suspect of me if I did anything like the wife did in the story.

[@pansprayers]

@@ergotempusvernum well, then you need to work that out with your partner. Mine wouldn't ever think I was cheating - DESPITE having been cheated in by his ex's - because he's an adult who communicates instead of accusing, and understands that life isn't this static insular bubble where only he exists.

[@alicewilloughby4318]

Story 1 - I'm only a little way into the story, but I've heard a number of cases where a man was told he was infertile and then his wife got pregnant and after some tests it turned that he might not be producing many sperm, but he was producing a few and the baby was his.

[@NovaGirl8]

yep. infertile is different from sterile. if he were the latter, I would be doubtful the kid is his.

[@charles0322mrsdani]

Story #1 Doctors are regularly wrong about things. I was told I could never have kids. I have 2. I have a dear friend who was told the same thing from her doctor....11 children later her doctor told her he didnt know why she came to him because obviously he didnt know what he was talking about. A coworker's doctor told her she was having a baby boy up until the day her daughter was born. You get the idea. Another buddy had gone through menopause 4 years earlier and the doctor told her there was no way she could be pregnant. She was. Doctors do not know everything. Its really all educated guessing.

[@pansprayers]

A lot of it is currently the pressure to do the 10 min sprint with 2 minutes of face time with the MD. Always ask questions when you're handed a diagnosis, even if the MD seems annoyed.

[@hoper1294]

I'd love to see some more prorevenge and relationships crossovers! This story was so good

[@kerridwynntheacegoblin6465]

Last story had me grinning like the petty thing I am.

[@Silence-1170]

Happy Thursday all of you grandpa is doing well, home but has to use a hospital bed. Wishing you all well.

[@Lou_sassel315]

Mark!! I love your videos and what you do!! Thank you so much for the consistent and great content and for being such a kind and loving soul! I wish you and your friends and family a wonderful day!❤️

[@SheilaNorthcutt]

Op1 - I think he’s an AH. She’s already physically going through a lot and mentally with work stress and he’s so insecure that he’s heaping more stress on her.

[@josephmbimbi]

Story 1: Nice to see them being able to communicate and a happy ending. However, i feel some sort of way about worrying about having a crucial conversation to your SO, especially if you are at the point of having children and building a life together. There were many legit reasons to be concerned, and imho, you shouldn't have to worry about approaching your SO with ANY concern. I want my SO to not be afraid to talk to me about anything, and to tell me what is on her mind straight up, as it is,no "i will not talk about this point not to sound accusatory", if that point is precisely what bothers you the most. I can receive your feelings, emotions, address them and not flip out. And i want reciprocity

[@groofromtheup5719]

s1; I don't have a known history of being cheated on, but even I would be torn up about those events.

[@jillb3072]

My friend’s husband said the urologist said he was 100% infertile, she got pregnant and he tried to have a “gotcha” moment. She made an appointment the following day, and more advanced testing said he could have kids. Why did you not tell her your diagnosis?

[@pansprayers]

The second he pulled a 'gotcha', he would've been told he has the option of therapy or divorce. I don't play games with people who try to set others up. It's cruel.

[@jillb3072]

@@pansprayers my friend called off her engagement to him. They'd been together for 8 years and he knew for four years prior. She got the final gotcha!

[@stephanien6237]

I strongly doubt a urologist would said “100% infertile” unless they had removed both testicles. No change that the term 100% was used. 🙄

[@ettinakitten5047]

@@stephanien6237 I totally believe it. Doctors often act *way* more certain than they actually are.

[@dracawyn]

We found out my husband is infertile about 6 years into the relationship (2 separate tests for sperm count and both came back with 0s). If I became miraculously pregnant, my very first thought would be to get a paternity test asap to set my husband's mind at ease so we could both celebrate the miracle and enjoy the pregnancy without any doubts or fears.

[@ineedhoez]

She offered to do it. It still didn't help his insecure ass

[@catalinacaro8183]

often when doctors or some other science field job professional tells you it's imposible, often means 99.9% impossible

[@candicebruney9040]

My bio dad had a vasectomy... but it failed as my older half sister, myself, and younger brother all exist

[@jessicaholland1903]

Story 1- I have a 5 Yr old and a 2 Yr old currently sleeping soundly next to me as proof the "can't get pregnant" thing doesn't always mean totally can't lol .... mine however was me not having any eggs or something ...... lol

[@WobblesandBean]

OP 2: Oh, honey. Just cuz something is technically legal, doesn't make it morally justified. You seem kinda clueless, as most teenagers are. This is why older men target kids like you, ESPECIALLY if they come from a broken home as you have, precisely for the reason that you fail to recognize their abuse tactics and red flags, and even end up making excuses for their actions, just as you did with your ex. Please be careful in the future, or else you're going to end up in yet another abusive relationship. P.S. Your step siblings are as wretched as your father. You have my condolences. P.P.S. My god, I bow to you and your revenge plan. Good on you for giving that conkwocket exactly what he deserves.

[@robertx8020]

I feel OP will be ok wfter some time I hope his ex ends up homeless :P Yes I have no sympathy for him!

[@maryaustin3560]

@Amelia Bee I've never heard of a conkwocket, and idk WTF it is, but somehow, I LOVE this and it is now my new very favorite word, and the go-to insult of choice. Thank you so much for introducing it to my repertoire, I simply adore it! Lmfao.

[@patredding]

That story had me so confused for a while, then the end cleared it up.

[@Regrettable-Username]

Story 1: People who've had vasectomies can get someone pregnant. It's very rare, but it does happen! And I'll echo what everyone else is saying - OP's wife is an angel. I can't imagine how someone can be that patient and understanding through that situation. OP better treasure her until the day he dies! 😤 Story 2: I hate abusive men. So glad that OP got away from him and got some revenge in the process.

[@Qwerty95ish]

I know a couple that was told they couldn't get pregnant. They have 5 kids. That being said I get OP being worried and OPS wife handled it amazingly.

[@pinkdipi]

I have a friend with two siblings born of an "infertile" mom :)

[@Metal_Mouth]

Story 1: Honestly he and wife dealt with the situation as maturely as they can. Op was valid in his doubt given his medical history and wife was very understanding and with the final update confirming that he was the father, I'm really happy for the couple and wish them the best of luck in parenthood. It's honestly funny comparing it to another story you did earlier in the week about a father wanting a paternity test, but he did it in the worst way possible, like the exact opposite on what to do in this scenario. Granted there were a *lot* of other things going on that lead to the break-up but the way that op broached it was 😬

[@skyedouglas9843]

Infertility is typically considered the inability to concieve within a year and doesnt always mean 0% chance of babies Im infertile but been pregnant 4 times in the last decade, it just takes one to get through It does make a massive impact on your mental health and you need a solid open minded partner

[@yahyashabazz5721]

Story 1 OP doesn't like counseling to help repair the rift HE bought into the marriage 🤣🤣🤣

[@cynicalrabbit915]

Story 1 Internal Narratives It's pretty easy to convince yourself of something. All it takes is either being afraid of something or wanting something positive or negative to happen. Example: A teen who has a crush and when they make a declaration the object if their crush letting them know either gently or harshly telling the love struck person there was no reciprical feelings.

[@pinkdipi]

*YES*, I'd love to hear more revenge stories! I'm a wimp and all proper, and look up to people with a calm mind and balls of steel! I'd love to have some positive influence, PLEASE!

[@tammypearce7491]

It's crazy that OP instantly went to the wife cheating. Sad

[@loganblackwood2922]

I would bet she cheated and paid for a fake paternity test result. Women today cannot be loyal.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Good news I was diagnosed with just really bad joint hypermobility

[@katiesmith2031]

That's good

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@katiesmith2031 yeah it really is I was really nervous 💜💜🤗🤗

[@katiesmith2031]

@@broken_queer_but_fighting8589 well now you can just relax and not worry

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@katiesmith2031 yep

[@pansprayers]

BJHMS by chance?

[@sidoniejordan-olsen7673]

It only takes one little swimmer

[@Mewse1203]

Be kind, be safe and take care of yourself. Have a great day.

[@BankruptMonkey]

I wish doctors were more specific and emphasized the difference between infertile vs sterile to their patients. It makes a big difference, like in this story.

[@ArcticWolfGod]

Story 2. Love the name change thing, that's some just according to keikaku kind of mastermind stuff.

[@daisyp1670]

David is the real MVP 🤘🏽

[@thetechguychannel]

Story 2: I have SERIOUS questions about the kind of company OP kept that led him to lead this kind of life. There are lots of red flags about OP's early life that are in between the lines and he doesn't mention (because from his perspective it's not relevant, but from the perspective of a psych, it definitely would be). I feel bad for him and hope he finds the right path.

[@damien678]

A lot of us FtM men take both birth control and testosterone, both things that lowers your chance of pregnancy pretty drastically. A lot of us still end up becoming seahorse dads anyway. Life really does find a way

[@stephanien6237]

“The doctor said it was impossible to get pregnant” was likely “the doctor said it was highly unlikely to get pregnant without the surgery”.

[@pixiechick05171971]

My husband was initially told he would never have kids. I have 2 daughters from a previous marriage. 2 months after we got married we became pregnant with our miracle baby. He is going to he 21 this year. My cousin and his wife tried for 20 years to have kids and all of the sudden they got pregnant not just once, but three times over a 4 year period.

[@AndyyWithAY]

First OP is insanely lucky his wife is tolerating his shenanigans. Insanely lucky. He needs some personal counseling. Without a doubt. I don't like the way he phrased it like she was saying the right things, but it wasn't actually true

[@golden_leader9227]

This is 100% the truth. I would probably be really angry at his second attempt to "clarify things".

[@joaolima7131]

I disagree, OP have a reason to be concerned, it's not like he was asking a paternity test out of nowhere, it would be a dick move if he wasn't infertile and was being insecure, it just shows that the wife understand his worries, a lot of infertile people think they can never have kids but that's a common misconception, it actually shows their relationship is strong. A third time would indeed be kinda annoying

[@golden_leader9227]

@@joaolima7131 you're indeed a better person than me. I can understand once, twice is one time too much. And i speak as a person who had a significant other cheat on me and who broke my trust one too many times. But then again, i would never have kids and build a family with someone that never healed from trauma and who "doesn't believe in therapy".

[@slytherinlibrarian3501]

Listening to him nitpick at benign things because he was holding her down to his ex's standard was frustrating, especially once she offered the paternity test without fuss. It got even more frustrating as she explained EVERYTHING, yet he didn'qt communicate and just attributed her answers to 'well she really has her story straight, huh?', allowed her to think that everything was OK, only to come back and accuse her of cheating because she was acting under false sense of things being sorted between them. It got to blood boilingly frustrating once she started offering him everything: a prenatal test (safe, but more invasive), open phone, and he pretended he was being magnanimous by saying he didn't want to be 'that kind of husband.' Newsflash: he already IS 'that kind of husband.' And for her to go through his accusations, low-grade gaslighting re: the communication, and offering him whatever he needs to feel better, he shrugs at the idea of counselling with a, 'I don't really believe in therapy, but maybe, whatever.' He's not willing to do ANYTHING on his end to improve his insecurities! He's putting all of the emotional labour on her after having dragged her name and character through the mud in his mind. She might be a Saint, but she's also a bit of a doormat.

[@golden_leader9227]

@@slytherinlibrarian3501 I couldn't have used better words to express my opinion on it.

[@Just_a_Goth]

See? This is why we don't cheat on people. It causes lasting scars. This guy could've ended up blowing up his happiness if he let that trauma win. Anyone could. Cheating is emotional, psychological, and physical (healthwise and loony APs/SOs).

[@Luckyrider1958]

S-1. CONGRATS to you both, and see, NOTHING is "impossible"!!

[@theresaschuebel5151]

If a parent is divorced and their new spouse have kids from a previous relationship then they are a STEP SIBLINGS , if they SHARE A PARENT THEN THEY ARE HALF. I hate when people call their HALF SIBLINGS STEP SIBLINGS

[@sierrastanley3109]

Two of my cousins were deemed infertile that was until their 30s and they both had kids of their own. (They were from different sides of the family and both told they couldn't have kids and then of course they did)

[@MrERRada]

This was a fantastic story! In fact, this is a story one of my favorite reddit KZbinrs read a bit ago and I loved it so much I didn't have an issue hearing you read it! And I was rewarded with an update! ^o^ at the time if my other KZbinr, there was no updates after him saying he warned other people that he had relationships with to not get too close. Everything after that was new to me! So please, by all means stop into pro revenge! It's my second all time most favorite Reddit genre. Second only to neckbeard stories! 🤣 Shout out to Reddix! Bouw bouw bouw!

[@mimminly]

Hi Mr Waffle. I've come down with a terrible sickness all of the sudden. This video came at a perfect time, thank you

[@MarkNarrations]

Sorry to hear that my friend, I hope you have a swift recovery!

[@LadyNikitaShark]

Story one. That happens. My friend(woman) was supposed to be completely infertile, now she has a 10y/o kid of a natural pregnancy.

[@ronaldfinkelstein6335]

Story 1:Maybe OP has watched a few too many of these Reddit videos, and they have planted the seeds of doubt in his mind.

[@WorldTree33]

Honestly, infertility issues aren’t as cut and dry as most assume. The women in my family are plagued with them. My mom was told she couldn’t have kids without extensive hormone treatments; she ended up pregnant with me a month later. My aunt had a disease that left her with almost no hope of having kids; she had two. So most times doctors say it’s impossible it’s just severely unlikely. Unless you just aren’t producing the stuff at all.

[@nyxstyxy]

Doctors really need to choose their words wisely, rather than saying, there is no chance for pregnancy, they should say that there is a slim chance.

[@stephanien6237]

I doubt the doctor actually said “no chance for pregnancy”. As the op says later In the story; the OP says the urologist said it would be “extremely unlikely to get pregnant”. Doctors almost never say 100%. But people go home with the gist of the conversation and just hear “we can’t get pregnant, the doctor said!” I guarantee that wasn’t in the medical chart.

[@ineedhoez]

Especially because the doctor was pushing for a surgery

[@Justignorekas]

Sadly got no reciets as my abusive ex did everything in person. Though they started to slip more and more so when i broke off all contact i had ZERO push back publicly. You know your behaviour is bad when your ex asks if they did the right thing and YOUR friends say hell yeah*. 😂

[@chrisidornigie]

Story 1: OP is actually quite selfish. After update 3 there is no mention of accountability or serious apologies to his wife…

[@kitkat9091]

S1: I can feel for the guy - I was told I couldn't have children! I have 2! I did have lots of miscarriages though - my problem was more delivery than getting pregnant in the end! What a great wife to be so calm at such a point!

[@Josku2411]

Oops a little late and got some battle scars from prying a plank off the bottom of my closet to get out a playing card from behind itXD

[@gtc9966]

The wife seems to be going out of her way to be suspicious

[@Detector1977]

S1: I absolutely HATE it when one partner paints a picture of how fantastic everything is and that the relationship is amazing with ZERO proof how the other partner is actually feeling. This ignorant attitute drives me crazy everytime....

[@ToddLeatherneck]

For the baby story - I was supposed to not be able to have kids.... 3 different doctors confirmed this. My son is now 5 almost 6.

[@jonathanbrown7250]

Hot tip -- when your husband gets a medical opinion that he can't have kids, then you get suddenly pregnant Not the best time to pull half your money out of your joint account

[@noneya3427]

The second story… that guy LOVES to play victim. I hate people like that. Just break up with him if he “treats you so badly.” 🙄

[@SeArquiteteMininu]

He was just a kid with a lot of self esteem issues. Glad you're a tough person, but pity you lack such an important thing called empathy.

[@TheHellsHobbit]

OPs wife in story one is amazing, OP on the other hand better be thanking the stars she did not leave, he needs the therapy, not her. Did he not think that all this may have cause her to have doubts at some point, he already thought she may have been cheating due to half information about his medical issue.

[@keplersdream901]

@Random Platypus with Internet And how do you know? Frankly, I've seen people simply not listen to the doctor. Also, OP's a liar. If you listen to his story, you'll note that he was intentionally spinning the story into his wife cheating, even when he admits that she's never been untrustworthy. Even when she said that she'd take a test, he continued on the bullshit train. 50 bucks says that either HE is cheating or he wants out. IT guys are toxic waste.

[@bessevaraven859]

Infertile doest mean sterile. Even with blockage it can happen. A cousin has had her tubes tied while her husband had a vasectomy because they had 3 kids......now they have four and she's had 2 miscarriages since

[@ineedhoez]

Jesus.

[@anonymouslee2083]

In the first story, I think OP’s wife understood how bad it looked. She understood that OP had probable caused to be suspicious. The fact that she fought like hell to prove her innocence without any pushback whatsoever as a huge green flag. Reminds me a lot of what my wife would be like in that type of situation, And it tells me that OP found a keeper

[@RaizelSX]

Story 1 was a rollercoaster, Dude needs some therapy cause wow. Now I can say she sounds like a truly lovely woman, I would also say the instinct are usually right unless you trick yourself into a belief, like they're not cheating, they're not abusive, or they hate you, etc it can go either side but always negative towards you Part of me is still sceptical because I remember reading a story like this where dude did all that and found out she was cheating, and yes the baby was his, it just so happens his boys were better Olympians. I am glad the kid is his but one thing I learned is just because the kids is his, doesn't mean she didn't cheat. Pessimistic food for thought