mythology.

[@skeletalwarrior3190]

I can't believe that the Internet Historian is friends with Stede Bonnet!

[@skeletalwarrior3190]

By the way Mr.Historian, I did not realize it was one and a half hour long till I had finished it. It was **Italian chef's kiss**

[@John_Notmylastname]

Steeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[@thrashandburn10221]

*Blackbeard has entered the chat*

[@judeboon2870]

@@thrashandburn10221 blackbeard has left the chat with all of stedes shit

[@ellie_shrug]

@@judeboon2870 *Stede will remember that*

[@jillweff]

You just posted the other day, I don’t think this is Internet Historian.

[@Snakedude4life]

Very Sus.

[@AxxLAfriku]

My life is amazing! I am a famous YouTub icon, I have two very attractive girlfriends and my videos change lives! This is not selfpromotion! This is the truth! The truth will set you free, dear will

[@Creme-BriLee]

@@AxxLAfriku what the hell is YouTub

[@DrLennieSmall]

@@AxxLAfriku I see you're still at this for reasons that continue to confuse me.

[@jcmottern]

I'm actually learning stuff by watching Internet Historian..This is amazing!!

[@disastermidi1990]

“She was a beautiful woman” Pyrocynical’s face on a stock image

[@Irishatheist24]

😆

[@josephdavila6511]

Well, I mean, have you seen his instagram?

[@thechannelofultimatedestiny]

tbh I thought it was tom holland.

[@johnericgobaton4068]

pyro is beautiful

[@brandon9172]

damn. I missed that part. Timestamp?

[@zedbee2736]

I come back to rewatch this from time to time because "What is a mythology? Everyone get down, this is a mythology!" has become ingrained into my brain

[@FIRSTNAMELASTNAME-zt4kf]

I completely forgot about it. It's great.

[@pedromaurutto]

NordVPN doesn't pay him enough, the ads are too good.

[@nurgle11]

I must admit I'm starting to watch it just for the ads :p

[@LucasChosen]

@@nurgle11 absolutely

[@naomi3557]

Maybe he does the ads this good because they pay him enough 🤔🧐

[@pedromaurutto]

@@naomi3557 these aren't just ads, that's art right there

[@pedromaurutto]

@Dziordan1 not enough

[@houseplant8540]

I feel like he opens a dictionary, slams his finger on a word then make a KZbin video on it

[@Shigellosis]

Don't give him ideas

[@Casedilla73]

*slams fist on table* “MASTICATE!”

[@Casedilla73]

I wonder if the word “dictionary” is in the dictionary.

[@houseplant8540]

@@Casedilla73 THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION THAT NEEDS AN ANSWER! IMMA GO. FIND A DICTIONARY

[@eeeee6431]

@@houseplant8540 He was never seen again.

[@arrw]

That Nord VPN anime intro was the best ad I've ever seen. Seriously. Wow. You seriously hired someone to sing it and everything.

[@Bustin_cider00]

Nordman, get to the nord hole

[@connormcintosh4828]

Internetcommentettiquet does really dope ads as well

[@TimPortantno]

Nord nord, nord, nord nord, nord nooooord.

[@dolphinpower1107]

Yeah and the intro didn't spoil the entire show.

[@CamTheWarlock]

Yeah, I’d watch the Nord VPN anime

[@handsoapinc]

26:15 So Midas was specifically blessed by Dionysius. When Midas asked for the Gold Touch, Dionysius says "That's a bad idea". Midas' wasn't tricked, he was just a bit short-sighted. He wouldn't need "Get out of jail" clause, he'd just need to stop asking for dumb things. He could have said "Give me the power to turn whatever I choose into Gold" and Dionysius would have given that. But Midas asked "Everything I touched" and ignored the warnings on how that was a really dumb thing to ask for.

[@TressonKaru]

In one animated version he gets so desperate to get rid of his powers he's like ILL SALE MY SOUL FOR A CHEESEBURGER! Paraphrasing a bit but ya get the idea. No daughter in this one.

[@suzbone]

@@TressonKaru mmmmm I could murder a cheeseburger right now

[@meb4224]

In the Muppets version, Kermit-as-King-Midas accidentally turned *himself* into gold.

[@CosmicTeapot]

@@meb4224 that's a very clever way of letting the audience know that Kermit touches himself 👀 On a related note: no one ever seems to mention the other glaring issue with Midas' wish, which is that it completely devaluates gold, thus defeating the whole purpose of his power. He'd be constantly bringing new gold in the world, it wouldn't take long before everyone and their dog had a metric fuck ton of gold, and it would no longer hold any value.

[@thefinnishbaconshroom]

I don't even know if it was that bad of a curse, atleast if a quick Google search is to be trusted, the power was only in his hands and some site even mentioned that gloves were able to prevent his power. So the fact he was starving was just due to his own stupidity.

[@masonross5656]

“I don’t mean to discriminate, Some of my best friends are alive” genius.

[@beenis08]

That actually killed me

[@robosing225]

We love you my guy. Ho nomo

[@evanbecraft8201]

@@beenis08 I see what you did there

[@davidlee1770]

@@beenis08 that joke made me feel alive

[@PandemoniumMeltDown]

Muha ha... ha ha... yes.

[@retiinas]

Disrespectful. My father died in a Mythology.

[@bigpigeon2384]

Prove it.

[@Snakedude4life]

Was your dad the guy who kept pushing the boulder uphill and could never get there? Just push it harder, lol.

[@Senkushi]

No he didn't

[@icecream7785]

sorry to break it to you chief, i dont think you exisy

[@eomoran]

Did he vote for Biden too?

[@danielbook]

"I'm not prejudice , some of my best friends are alive" Haha, lost it there.

[@nob2243]

"Ha! That's exactly something a prejudiced person would say!"

[@DisorientedWanderer]

@@nob2243 "ah well you got me there. Alright I'll give you a free ride. Hop on."

[@KomradeCPU]

@@nob2243 the joke was how easy it is to pressure someone to do something when you use that ad hominin; the prejudice there came from the assumption of prejudice.

[@disastermidi1990]

Typical “I have a living friend” argument.

[@thephalken]

@@KomradeCPU noone likes a joke explainer

[@HowDoIMakeAUsername]

The irony of Socrates coming up to Plato to tell him about Plato's allegory of the cave tho

[@serafimdaserra9104]

Well Socrates arguably is a made up character

[@kultenhughes3585]

@@serafimdaserra9104 most scholars will beat the shit out of you if you say that. But in all honesty he could be made up. Its just that Plato wasn't the only person to reference and talk about Socrates in that time period.

[@Akuryoutaisan21]

@@serafimdaserra9104 People don't write legal defences for people that don't exist

[@ChronicNOTAG]

@@Akuryoutaisan21 Yes they do. Case in point, feminists about any fictional japanese female character. "We must protect the fictional children, but not the real ones, because that's an uncomfortable truth or some shit like that I don't know."

[@carlitonoid1117]

@@serafimdaserra9104 this

[@richardnixonpog9925]

next time on nord anime: nord and friends go to a beach to play volleyball

[@bcunningham3718]

Yes, we need the Nordman beach episode

[@sar_ptolemy]

@@bcunningham3718 lets f*cking gooooooo

[@clonkers]

@@sar_ptolemy lets fucking GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[@donovanjoseph737]

Nord vpn-ime

[@brunocarranzaaragon921]

Truly a sight to be seen in the Nord VPN-iverse

[@thejfj]

Mythology is a myth. Don't bother

[@maeam]

Methology

[@AlexAndLilChompa]

It’s a myth

[@shieldedboi9680]

i mean... ur not wrong

[@swift5384]

Its the sock man, friend of neo

[@Creeper_Boom1]

I gotta obje-...actually...mhm fine no objection

[@Kevin-vz6dv]

Pyrocynical would be very happy to know he’s considered “classically beautiful” enough to be a mythological woman.

[@Ohnoitsthatguy-620]

No he wouldn't. he'd rather be a Renaissance depiction since they are fat.

[@KingoftheKami]

@@Ohnoitsthatguy-620 you

[@thomassaint7775]

@@Ohnoitsthatguy-620 Sick reference bro. Everyone knows your references are out of control.

[@cnlbenmc]

Are you sure you don't mean a Furry?

[@hahaha10001]

I did a double take to make sure that's who it was

[@filiaknight8514]

"nono im not trying to discriminate, some of my best friends are alive"

[@kingdavey90]

I love that line 😂

[@susisblusis]

I'm.. Wait for it... ... ... ... dead!!! 😂

[@reillymcwriting]

Deceased people are still inferior tho

[@acatwithafancyhat5782]

@Sheklelberg Goldstein I mean often they are literally beneath you.

[@acatwithafancyhat5782]

@Sheklelberg Goldstein yeah in that they are literally beneath your feet often. Buried, mourned, and eventually forgotten. Soon enough we will all join them to be naught but shadows and dust.

[@justsomeguy6240]

“Not in the klan it’s just a hood” Finally they admit it

[@dariusvult7354]

Truly disappointing ik

[@lucafacchinetti2522]

@@dariusvult7354 you can't say that, man

[@nikhilgholap6243]

what? i did not understand. can you explain?

[@josysam6299]

@@nikhilgholap6243 from clan he meant KKK, it is a racist white supremacist group. You might have seen them in movies and TV shows, there are identified with white hood Nord VPN man and raid Shadow legend.

[@ijemand5672]

@@josysam6299 their*

[@JonkariP]

My body wasn't ready for a new masterpiece this soon man

[@frodoan]

Are any of us?

[@alw2839]

I've been ready!! ( haven't watched the video yet )

[@surrealdynamics4077]

Omg, nobody expected this!

[@TheV-Man]

I feel satisfied

[@cactuscraze4877]

@annie's big day wow... someone’s dumb

[@breadlast]

The story of David and Bathsheba (the bathing woman) is even more messed up than they mentioned. David actually got her pregnant, tried to get the guy to go home and sleep with his wife so he'd think it's his kid, but the guy was too loyal to his army regiment or whatever and refused to go home till the war was over. So David wrote a letter to have the guy put on the front lines and have everyone else step back to make absolutely certain the man would be killed, and then *had the man deliver the letter ordering his own execution*

[@slicedtopieces]

I think David might be a baddie...

[@JJ-xw8sv]

@@slicedtopieces God did punish David comically hard for it though, people always leave that part out.

[@whyiseverysinglehandletaken2]

​@@JJ-xw8svelaborate on that one

[@gamechip06]

​@@whyiseverysinglehandletaken2basically got exiled and lost his entire kingdom and got to live in the wild

[@ab-gail]

@@whyiseverysinglehandletaken2 The baby died.

[@Plempy]

It’s good we clarified Nord-man isn’t in the klan.

[@Definitely-not-the-FBI]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@donovanberserk4993]

Thought he was part of Toki's eracism for Metallocalypse

[@bradenwoods1111]

Finally haha

[@JK-gm6kk]

Heard that part shortly after reading this, so thank you op

[@warcheef]

The funny thing about Socrates is, that he was a Hoplite - a type of soldier carrying a huge spear and shield into battle. Apparently, he was fucking ripped, which explains why people didn't just punch him out when his philosophic inquiries were starting to get on their nerves. Basically, imagine you are just walking around, minding your business, and suddenly young Arnold Schwarzenegger blocks your path and starts aggressively questioning you about the nature of justice or some shit. That's what an encounter with Socrates was like, in a nutshell.

[@jamesharding3459]

Now I want to see that firsthand

[@coverage022]

That honestly adds so much to his story haha

[@phantomfenrir4976]

So, one of the oldest registered Nerd bullies?

[@w0y4k15]

Honestly, I feel like I'd do that at the bar if I was huge and ripped. It's like real world trolling, but more insightful.

[@tiedyedowl8367]

Such a cool image in my head. Thanks for this info

[@adrianh.5038]

“You’re at war.” “Uh huh.” “With the Japanese.” _“Not again.”_

[@MatheusAugustoGames]

Monthly mishap

[@bigboi4269]

“Your desonarbru”

[@Dawe360]

1941 likes, perfect

[@FIRSTNAMELASTNAME-zt4kf]

Oh bugger I quite like there anime and culture.

[@13leafclover86]

I think one of the funniest parts of the Orpheus myth as a whole is that Hercules has a myth where he goes down to hades and brings a guy's wife back from the dead just to apologize for being a bad houseguest. Sucks for you Orpheus, Hercules was just built different I guess

[@ab-gail]

He literally was!

[@Mustang-wt1se]

Insert Hercules is Roman. Heracles is Greek

[@ArchHippy]

David, a man famous for throwing stones, falls in love with a woman who lives in a glass house. I don't see what could possibly go wrong.

[@אוריארנס]

Dude, david is more known for taking the foreskin of 200 palestinians and giving them to the king so he could marry the princess

[@wallybal1297]

BASED

[@ALLIRIX]

What's the name of the girl in the glass house?

[@bobthetimetraveler2717]

@@ALLIRIX Bathsheba

[@CantusTropus]

@@אוריארנס Isn't that Samson?

[@BronzeManul]

Do 'empire .' and cover great empires like China, Mongol, Roman, Persian, HRE, and British.

[@hilmizamin8831]

HE LIKED IT!!!!!

[@split_bug6760]

69th like

[@polygondwanaland8390]

>holy >roman >empire pick none t. voltaire

[@a_history_nerd569]

Now we wait for 2-3 years.

[@teal_m_101]

And the Athenian Empire.

[@emmyobinna]

"I am not discriminating...some of my best friends are alive" - I m dying here

[@jauzaafaishalahmadpadmadis3846]

“im dying here?” that’s just death culture appropriation!!!

[@dennis7437]

Not that you would know any of those friends. You know, because they go to a different school.

[@emmyobinna]

@@dennis7437 lmao. they ought to bring back bussing for the 'mortally challenged'

[@raymondjchen]

2:41 timestamp for reference purpose

[@jeebus2121]

@@raymondjchen You're the real MVP here.

[@leafgreenbeast]

the orpheus thing is rough since *he* was past the threshold of the underworld, but eurydice apparently wasnt, so he lost her on a technicality

[@Apputhegreat12]

Testing the absolute limit of Nord's marketing team since ever.

[@KCzz15]

I'm literally only here for the adverts, so they should be paying him double for these.

[@milanes4]

i turned off the sponsor skip just to see this ad

[@Pijawek]

I wouldn't be surprised if it turned out he wasn't sponsored and just makes this ads for the fun of it

[@albingrahn5576]

@@milanes4 sponsor skip? is it like a browser addon?

[@Frakenstien20]

@@albingrahn5576 Probably using SponsorBlock or Vanced

[@Adrian-gf1zb]

I hope NordVPN keeps sponsoring him so we can see how far he will take the idea of NordVPN-man.

[@digiquo8143]

I'm convinced Nord stopped sponsoring him forever ago and he just keeps making the ad spots for the hell of it.

[@enclave2k1]

nordvpn is a company? I'm just here for the sweet OC.

[@kisbalintkirill4443]

@@digiquo8143 there's an actually working link in the description

[@goeland4585]

@@kisbalintkirill4443 don't try using evil logic

[@SumilatsFansReadURLs]

@@goeland4585 nah its nicer to imagine he is being sponsored because then he gets payed :D

[@herrbutterlachs1364]

What ever those people from Nord VPN are paying him, it's not enough.

[@Z1LT01D]

i cant agree with you more. im gonna get nord just because of him

[@abigcupofwater]

For the record, when Socrates was chilling preparing to drink the poison, everyone wanted to help him make a grand escape and he was like Nah Poison

[@warbler1984]

I heard he was so annoying even more of them wanted to kill him

[@DrrrMatt]

I don't care how much Nord is paying to sponsor, they aren't paying enough. These ad rolls just keep getting better.

[@bensellick31]

It's a mastapiece

[@heskeny6109]

I actually got nord

[@aquilleswinkler5051]

Remember that time he tried to see how fast we could lose his nord sponsorship? So that was a bust then.

[@Gromek999]

I played enough Hades to know everything from this video, don't you worry

[@arcanecoalition7583]

What up gromek didnt know youd be here

[@Silverman160Zero]

"Let's talk about the story of Orpheus" Oh yeah, its big brain time.

[@videopolice432]

Are you sure about that?

[@BaronMan]

I played enough God Of War to know about greek mythology

[@ralof261]

Please play mordhau again

[@killertrip10]

"I would not fight a lion nude" Words to live by.

[@noyouwillnot1169]

Yeah, you should at least put some jeans on.

[@bruceluiz]

Me neither. The lion needs a headstart, perhaps some armor for him?

[@goldenlizard92]

"Sir, someone's planning to attack Hades!" "Myself, my realm, or my son?" "...yes"

[@darthgamer9861]

*blasts him* freakin smartass

[@weareoutbreak89]

"and than they also plan to attack Vegeta" "my son, the Planet or... " "YESSSSSSS!!!!!!"

[@JDeO1997]

The most inaccurate thing in this was Hades taking a second wife. Unlike 99% of the Greco-Roman pantheon (including his brothers), Hades was actually loyal to Persephone

[@myalt3019]

Except for that one time with the nymph Minthe

[@beetlethebard7624]

And the girl that became poppy trees.

[@JDeO1997]

True about Minthe and the Poppy girl, but considering the rest of the pantheon, it still puts his loyalty fairly high

[@myalt3019]

@@JDeO1997 Especially considering Zeus

[@DarkDoomguy]

Hades is a pretty chill guy all things considered

[@PrismTheKid]

Why didnt Orpheus just tell his wife to poke him in the back to prove she was still there? So many loopholes, Hades, man

[@frankwest5388]

@Stella Hohenheim well it’s either that or no zombie sex. And he chose poorly

[@elenidjuriric308]

Probably sarcasm, but Euridiki didn't have a physical form while in Hades. In most version's of the story, Orpheys had absolutely no idea she was behind him, there was no light, and he couln't grab her hand. He turned once he saw light, because he missed her so much, and well. . . .

[@breastmilkgaming]

he should've used a mirror or put a gps tag on her

[@TheMasterTelevision]

Someone else said it but Orpheus's physical form was taken from him to get through the realm of hades. It's more like he awoke from a sleepwalking dream. At some point Orpheus's senses start returning to him, and he can't even tell if he's able to speak to communicate to her. When he begins seeing the blinding light of the Mortal realm, he's forced to avert his gaze and instantly is overwhelmed by his desire to see his wife. He glaces before he has time to think, and the first thing he can physically see again is his wife being pulled back to hades. He basically caught a glance and she immediately was sucked into a black void. Basically he went insane seeing something so abstractly horrifying that he had no way to portray it. He lost his muse, and nowthe constantly replaying memory of his wife being dragged to hell because of his failure, became his only inspiration. The music he played, which I think was Orpheus bashing his instrument with a rock slowly in a constant rhythem, caused people to go insane. I believe his music had some supernatural quality, so he was unintentionally giving people visions of hades, and that drove them to literally rip him apart. If you give me constant, rhythmic visions of hell nonstop, I'll probably kick your nuts at the least.

[@gengoosekhan]

He would have heard her stop bitching on the way back.

[@ChronoTango]

Orpheus dying by a “group of irate women” is probably the most Monty Python thing I’ve heard.

[@bird2793]

Like in "The Meaning of Life " where the guy gets chased by a topless women's rugby team off a cliff right into his grave

[@amberhernandez]

@@bird2793 God I wish that were me

[@adampage593]

I love how Hades says "Oh me wife!" as if he's just noticed the sink overflowing

[@comfortablesharpshooter3419]

I just caught myself excitedly saying "Yes!" when he said "Ad-Time". Historian has truly evolved his Ad-Game above any conceivable measure.

[@uhoh7545]

PST podcast is tied

[@Tiberon098]

We now need a Nord VPN anime series now.

[@Kiezkollege]

And it isn't even his final form

[@brandaddy9986]

Pretty sure that’s the cuckmindset

[@burimsaliji23]

Ads better then anywhere else 😊😊😊😊

[@Spaghettiproductions]

This man drops a masterpiece and is like “alright back to normal business”

[@cypher_302]

And not just that, he made a movie and now makes this and posts this in a week

[@zm1055]

Masterpieces are his normal business

[@Tiberon098]

This is probably the best “retelling” of the story of Orpheus and Eurydice.

[@SCP-1762-BOL]

Better than Hadestown

[@DzheiSilis]

@@SCP-1762-BOL heretic

[@SCP-1762-BOL]

@@DzheiSilis Oh dear, Jupiter will have my head for that.

[@solairesolalalalalemon1198]

You are a dice. Not me.

[@TheSuperNaruto96]

If Black Orpheus didn't exist, i'd 1000% agree.

[@roifrvr]

Orpheus in Hades is just a DnD bards own sidequest, especially the part where some people cut him up and throw him into the river.

[@hokeypoke557]

A nat 1 performance check will really screw you over after you spend two sessions making the DM walk you through your whole 'save my girlfriend' side quest

[@lordsesshoumaru8596]

was just wondering if the reality is if he wasn't so narcissistic playing his damn harp he could have heard if she was behind him. Also to story makes me think of Osiris as he was chopped up and thrown into the Nile river..

[@TheJarJarKinks]

"Everyone get down, this is a mythology" not even 30 seconds in, and this is gold.

[@CatholicZola]

That made me scream with laughter already

[@dearcastiel4667]

I...I don't get it :(

[@EventH0riz0n]

Not even 10 seconds, man this is going to be good

[@Jon-ky2cz]

Midas is shaking rn

[@boogiewoch9507]

You got touched by King Midas

[@Not_Bage]

"A beautiful woman" Uses pyrocynical's face Your tastes are cultured I see

[@restfulflames9855]

Hah it didn't age well

[@Not_Bage]

@@restfulflames9855 yeah ;-;

[@zaurhasanov5458]

@@restfulflames9855 what happened?

[@Not_Bage]

@@zaurhasanov5458 just search up Pyrocynical allegations, there are plenty of channels covering the topic But the TLDR goes something like this: Ivory accuses Pyro of grooming, Pyro fans mad, Turker tom makes vid saying Pyro is lying, Pyro fans go against Pyro, Pyro makes response, Pyro fans glad Btw this thing is still happening, grab a popcorn friend, this is going to be a long ride

[@The300Player]

@@Not_Bage im pretty sure its over now, turkey tom got destroyed and i havent seen anybody talk about it anymore

[@MrLinuxify]

Dude Internet Historian literally makes the only ads I don't ever skip.

[@panpiskotka1207]

Same

[@Badguy292]

The sheer effort going into the editing is almost on the level of GachiMuchi edits lmao. I love it.

[@Disco.Wizard]

Was also gonna say Internet Comment Etiquette but the comment above beat me to it

[@DerAykac]

Calming to see other people, who studied under Erik, too. And you´re damn right, these two have the strongest ad-game

[@Hanzel06]

NORD IS THE NORD VPNOOOOORD

[@gardenofwords914]

Midas couldve just reworded his wish to "Anything I want to be gold, will be transformed into gold upon my touch". Would mean that he would have the leisure of being able to turn his power on/off.

[@Dragonoidalpha]

IH has started unironically saying innit

[@KomradeCPU]

I started to say innit randomly, innit.

[@ghoulbuster1]

a lil' weird innit?

[@wotruannwah5678]

Same

[@TheExel80]

Gentelman pirate is back!!!!?

[@nejinaji]

Guess he really did have that AR15

[@Joe-qq8ox]

That was such a good episode

[@McCoy-00]

Yes but actually no

[@muserweaver]

STEEEEEEEEED

[@fledi7599]

The best episode he has ever made. It was amazing

[@shaunlevin5081]

The Socrates painting makes a lot more sense if they are actually just tired of his shit.

[@kacperszatko8192]

The best part is- they told him about execution like a week before so he could simply escape. But he stayed to annoy all of Athen to the end of his life.

[@kacperszatko8192]

Of course now everyone calls it bravery or something, but he was just big pain in the sphimcter

[@Shatterstar]

@@kacperszatko8192 I strive to be that level of spiteful asshole.

[@kacperszatko8192]

@@Shatterstar do you really want to end up in court for "destroying the minds of youth"? I can imagine that getting real in a dystopian future

[@twoac]

"Everyone get down, this is a mythology!" had me busting up laughing seconds into this video!

[@andrewwhitehurst6948]

Move over, TED-ed. Internet Historian is taking over the mythology series.

[@boogalooboys7800]

TED-ed more like special ed

[@nxxynx5039]

@@boogalooboys7800 got emm

[@boogalooboys7800]

@Abacus Listener Somesone like you was bound to get triggered and then post a "you aren't smart" comment.

[@jasoethesentienteyeshapedg4847]

What's wrong with TED-ed? I enjoyed some of their videos.

[@ricardoalves9605]

@@jasoethesentienteyeshapedg4847 Nothing it's a great channel, people are just making jokes

[@hazzardalsohazzard2624]

Internet Historian: Shows footage of a Disney film I've seen a dozen times when Hades turns. Me: AMAZING!

[@danny_decheeto8300]

“David has an advantage” God? “Technology”

[@benwhite3514]

Deus ex machina

[@mirzantp4663]

"And is there still people who's afraid of technology"

[@Scallycowell]

@@benwhite3514 Brilliant

[@cuckmasterflex9106]

TECHNOLOGY

[@mirzantp4663]

@@cuckmasterflex9106 "oh my god"

[@ambrose7196]

The editors really good. For example, there's the fire crackling sound effect that plays in the background that add for immersion. Most people probably wouldn't even notice and yet it was added. Mad respect for him.

[@ScurvySeamate]

Considering he has an entire sweatshop of editors, yeah, even his non-Main channel videos are great.

[@JK-gm6kk]

I heard that his name is Barry

[@kyleryancooperify]

Dionysus legit was like "ahh Midas, you should probably reconsider" and Midas still went through with it.

[@JackPorter]

And then the next one he tries he actually gets right! Except he goes fifty octaves up in the end of the word.

[@videogamenostalgia]

Chad move

[@samgeraldo8164]

Imagine when the god of drinking tells you to chill the fuck out.

[@newsystembad]

When your DM asks "are you sure you want to do this?" you should really listen.

[@TheMasterTelevision]

When the god of drunks wouldn't go that far Don't go that far. You don't want the God of Getting Shitfaced frowning upon you

[@vinnyreed723]

Mythology: Internet Historian uploading on his Main Channel

[@JimmyTurner]

People keep saying this like he hasn't been. Yeah for a while he wasn't but its been months since he started again.

[@denalischopp]

This is the main channel now

[@JimmyTurner]

@@denalischopp its always been the main channel.

[@atlantic2909]

For anyone interested: Nathaniel Hawthorne was an extremely able scholar of Latin and Greek. He wrote The Wonder Book for Boys and Girls and its sequel, Tanglewood Tales, as modern versions of classic myths for children. It was quite a task to create an original translation of ancient myths in the 1800's, and he was one of the first writers to adapt these myths specifically for children. The tales are uniquely accurate to the original myths because Hawthorne could read, speak, and compose in the original Latin and Greek. The books sold like hotcakes. They were akin to the Percy Jackson series if Riordan had the highest quality learning available to man and was a certifiable literary genius.

[@yonatanbeer3475]

That's amazing, thanks for sharing. I was going to make a joke about the hubris it takes to name your book "wonderbook" but this guy seems like he has it down.

[@steviepeculiar2415]

@@yonatanbeer3475 Maybe he named it wonderbook because fairytales used to be called "wondertales" if I'm not mistaken

[@josephe4766]

>implying rick riordan isn't a veritable beacon of literary mastery

[@atlantic2909]

@@josephe4766 I would advise you to read more classical literature and less Greek fanfiction.

[@josephe4766]

@@atlantic2909 Not exactly sure what you mean by classical literature but it's a simple irrefutable fact that Rick Riordan bests the original Greek myth by far

[@thedarkness111]

David Mitchell also pointed out that if you went around turning everything into gold the price of gold would plummet and it would all be virtually worthless.

[@speedingatheist]

"Why do we have to censor ancient paintings, famous works of art?" "We're on PuritanTube!" "Sigh."

[@boomeryang9635]

Ikr... Puritans hate art anyways

[@DarkEcho119]

@@xenoman2238 Oy vey

[@kane1356]

being a woman on an internet historian nordvpn ad is now synonymous with being killed in the most brutal ways possible

[@apelsejati3261]

That just mean we have to get nordvpn or we will die in a gruesome way

[@legendarymarston9174]

But...NordVPN Woman is still alive

[@juwonoy2038]

only Internet Historian can make me want to see ads

[@brandonmccready9491]

Download AdBlock

[@allengilbert7463]

@@brandonmccready9491 He's talking about the sponsorship ad at 15:09.

[@galangrizky9781]

@@allengilbert7463 thanks for the timestamps maan ,, now i can watch it over and over again,, noord nord nord nordd

[@JohnChoidotOrg]

The Origins of Raycon Man from "The Virus Strikes Back" is so damn good. It's better than 99% of the internet.

[@juwonoy2038]

@@galangrizky9781 exactly more ads : )

[@samuelgriffis4776]

I would love it if the time traveller went back expecting to tell the Icarus myth maker that the story was flawed, went back just in time to see Icarus and Daedalus actually doing the flying thing and it all plays out exactly as the myth says. And the time traveller is just like, "Oh'

[@tornadoawe]

Tbf in Greek mythology the sun is a flaming chariot driven across the sky by Helios (later this task was attributed to Apollo), so it makes complete sense that "height = heat".

[@StumpedIDIT]

“But now we shall both surely drown.” Said the frog. “Lol” said the scorpion. “Lmao”

[@Sonichero151]

Scorpions can actually survive underwater for a prolonged amount of time

[@StumpedIDIT]

@@Sonichero151 yeah I know, but in the fable the meme was taken from the scorpion died

[@galactic-hamster7043]

A fellow Gianni fan?

[@theonlyplain]

@@Sonichero151 thats why scorpion doesnt care

[@Julianna.Domina]

@@theonlyplain thog don't care

[@as7river]

Mythology: there's a whole segment dedicated to the Hulk's Johnson.

[@pr6897]

Why wear armor when you have the power of chonk

[@seanlanglois8620]

I played as Midas in fortnite

[@junkiejackflash]

Damn, I thought you meant Hulk Hogan, brother.

[@bourgeoiscaesar]

"Two wives, innit?" I have no idea why, but that line absolutely killed me

[@aryantaywade298]

same lmao

[@crm7428]

Bro I've been replaying over and over

[@geoffstemen3652]

“twice as good”

[@peterstangl8295]

5:05 free replay button, innit?

[@Vineor]

That whole scene fits too well, the smirky harold on top of Hades and the smoothness of the lines + some oldshool wife treasuring

[@themasonator7370]

I can't believe how absolutley rewatchable these are! They never fail to entertain

[@Geegs]

"Two wives, innit?" I chortled.

[@jimbobob9273]

*"C H O R T L E D"*

[@keegman5144]

Just as I read this the line came up lmao

[@carlosc8329]

"Twice as good"

[@crusty_]

I support polygamy

[@francescolombardi3438]

i mean, he is the boss

[@kylefunston484]

They missed one of the best parts of the Socrates story. He was so obnoxious in presenting his case when he was to be executed, that more people voted for his execution than voted for a guilty verdict. He actually changed jurors minds into hating him after he was found guilty, because he went on a 30 minute tirade about how everyone was an idiot except him.

[@BattletoDeath]

In the end, he was right.

[@Vineor]

@@BattletoDeath course he was, imagine thinking the lowest common denominator is ever right Lmao

[@X-SPONGED]

He was the original neckbeard

[@peterclarke7240]

Considering he was 72, was being out on trial for "corrupting" the city's youth by encouraging them to think and question things, I strongly suspect he knew the gig was up for him as a philosopher, so he goaded everyone into killing him rather than back down and live the rest of his life in shame. Bloke was a fuckin' dude, basically. Also, the ancient Greeks didn't have the frankly peculiar notion about the sanctity of life that we do, in that you should cling to it forever, despite the indignities and degradation heaped upon you until you're sat in a pile of your own shit and need some impoverished carer to clean you up and spoon gruel down your throat because you don't even know who you are any more. For the ancient Greeks, dignity was more important than life, so Socrates's actions actually make perfect sense.

[@mumkeymaan4600]

Redditor moment

[@pigmentpeddler5811]

the "some of my best friends are alive" joke gets me every time without fail, so good

[@dexlovesgames_dlg]

“The boatman” is actually my favorite Greek character.

[@kingguy3]

Charon on the river styx is a pretty badass gatekeeper and boatman

[@Chimken_nunget]

He’s just vibing 😎

[@RedEzelt]

Charon my good friend

[@PANCAKEMINEZZ]

I went through the game Hades for the first time not too long ago and coming across Orpheus and Eurydice was the funniest experience ever because I could only picture both as Ordinary Things and IH

[@Saberjet1950]

Socrates in that painting is just like: "AND ANOTHER THING"

[@AuraAstral_44]

Damn, that reminded me of when I first met him in AC Odyssey. Damn philosophers.

[@rezandrarizkyirianto-1933]

It's time for some deep thoughts with Heinlein~

[@753studios6]

Everyone else in the painting *VISIBLE FUSTRATION*

[@unowenwasholo]

"I'm not a man who's easily convinced. You're either dead or you're not getting on the boat." C'mon Charon, mate.

[@akumasstorytime3910]

Hey is that a reference

[@JonatasAdoM]

@@akumasstorytime3910 If it wasn't now it is to this comment.

[@DanielEarl]

"Beautiful woman" Shows femboy Pyro

[@terminator572]

She is a beautiful woman

[@Trewita]

i can't see the difference

[@icecream7785]

dudes a beauty ngl

[@liveforever141]

Pretty much nailed it

[@cocoroach_ok]

I'm a straight, but damn Fem Pyro's hot tho

[@ripleyandweeds1288]

"I'm an important musician you've probably heard of me--" "Nope."

[@TheD404]

You know the video is going to be good when he says the title at the start and then says it again right after

[@as7river]

Etiquette... ETIQUETTE! WHAT IS ETIQUETTE? It was at this moment, I knew I struck gold.

[@randomsleepyness]

"And thats why Season 8 of GoT wasn't that bad", I laughed, got angry, and felt sad all at once

[@snaipd2582]

Are you still sponsored by nordvpn or is this just a running gag now.

[@TheKaPriest]

Asking the real questions here

[@derfalke9178]

He is nordvpn

[@Tremezy]

This is the only naruto running gag in the world

[@Jsssddfgffghshdhdhusjsjd]

Nord is sponsored by him

[@lukemckenzie0121]

You gotta sponsor them so hard until they have to pay you not to

[@aecusregen4614]

Internet Historian, Ordinary Things and Jon Tron are all the same shape shifting entity that has to follow the rule that it must always have a beard

[@aecusregen4614]

wait wtf, why am I here? I've never seen this video? I think I watched the first minute of this video, commented, then fucked off

[@internet_user9822]

And SumitroEntertainment, you can't forget him

[@joshuaward2271]

The story of David is actually much worse lmao. He successfully seduces the woman he finds bathing (Bathsheba), and he ends up getting her pregnant. David orders for Uriah (the husband) to come to the palace, and asks him how the war is going and how the men are doing. After some idle chit-chat he asks Uriah to go back to his home and relax *wink* there. The next morning, he finds that Uriah did not in fact go home but slept at the entrance to the palace where all of David's servants slept. David was all like "yo wtf dude I specifically requested you go home" but Uriah didn't want to because he felt it was unfair that all of his other friends and comrades in the army were out there in the sticks while he got to go sleep in his house and make love with his wife, so he didn't do it. So David got Uriah absolutely slammed that night while dining with him, and told Uriah that he should go home and relax *wink*, but even drunk Uriah would not do it for respect for his fellow soldiers. David then sent him out to the front lines, specifically wrote to the general that they should put him where the fighting is the worst and fall back so he would die, and THEN married the Bathsheba. So all in all a pretty standup guy.

[@calvinjohnson9884]

This sounds so similar to the Japanese mythology tale of Izanagi and Izanami. Both even stated the husband couldn't look around at their wife as they left the underworld.

[@mokeenoch7900]

And Besheba will later give birth to Solomon, the rightful heir to king David.

[@GrugGangGrugGang]

@@calvinjohnson9884 The thing about Izanami is that it is implied that she was already corrupted and evil, and it was a ploy to get Izanagi to help destroy the world.

[@genesisera8364]

it was so odious God was like “wtf, uncool”

[@Bayofthe91st]

hol up, is that what the english word 'bath' came from? A word adopted from of a story about terrible douchebag king??

[@EremitaJ]

Can't believe you actuallly got THE Stede Bonett from pirate history books to collab with you, glad to see he got the Director's Cut ending for his life instead of the canon one.

[@angel964o]

The story for Orpheus is actually connected to my home country - the deepest, unexplored, European water cave is in Bulgaria, many people have drowned trying to find where the streams lead, and no bodies were recovered, and the story goes that Orpheus went inside that cave to reach Hades. It's called the Devil's Throat.

[@bigpigeon2384]

So People keep going deep in the devils throat?

[@testtestington6204]

@@bigpigeon2384 i want r34 of the devils throat and gods d

[@whatagreatnameaye1169]

@@testtestington6204 yo what the fuck

[@smallandstressed2364]

America has a Devil Hole with a species so rare and specialized that they are only able to live in a small section of said hole. There are less than 200 of them in the wild and the only successful way to breed them is in a unspecified facility, that costs a couple million dollars, that replicates the conditions of the hole. The Devil Hole Pupfish are a national treasure and I love them.

[@cloroxusthestainlessone4324]

@@bigpigeon2384 go to castleton, you can delve deeper into the devil's arse

[@sethyuikora2]

I think the King David story is way more interesting, relating to the human condition in detail. He's smitten with the woman, she explains she's married, but her husband is away fighting a war for David. They sleep together anyways, as he is the king and can pretty much get what he wants. She informs him later that she's pregnant. David freaks out because it'd be a huge scandal, so he recalls the husband from the army to come personally to him as a messenger. Husband is so gung-ho, even though David insists he stay in town and rest before returning to battle, he refuses to go to the comfort of his own home because he knows his friends are out there fighting and dying. So he returns to battle without seeing his wife, thwarting David's plan to pawn the kid off as being legitimate, he figures the next course of action will be to send orders to the guy's squad that they are to push deep into enemy territory, engage in battle, and when the odds are stacked against them, abandon the husband to die. When word reaches David that the deed has been done, he makes a show of how he had warned the man not to overextend near the enemy's walls. A story of adultery, mischief, and the assassination of an innocent man because power corrupts.

[@PutkisenSetä]

I dread to think what their worst king was like if this dude was the bee's knees.

[@isimiel3405]

Maybe Midas can solve Greece's crippling debt

[@thegodofimagination]

That would be nice

[@laidbackrey]

How did no one back then think of that

[@Falicity345]

But if you oversaturize the market, the value goes down

[@christianweibrecht6555]

@@Falicity345 if Greece was in a situation where I could resolve it current financial woes by causing long-term damage to the global economy, it would

[@theblackbaron4119]

Problem is, Midas is just touching himself.

[@Tomatosaladz]

"Imagine dying because of a region block, me neither NORD VPN saves lives." A perfect slogan

[@phosphoros60]

"What's a horse?" "I dunno, sixty quid!?" "NO! What IS a horse?"

[@efu2046]

I fucking died here everytime. Spat my coffee and everything

[@illumitommy]

Sorry I'm late, don't know if anyone got to this, but David could see the woman bathing from his palace because your bathing area was on your roof, because privacy and rain collection. The palace was probly the only place higher than common roofs.

[@eyesofthecervino3366]

That makes sense.

[@illumitommy]

@@eyesofthecervino3366 we can assume David was pretty confident or cocky because when he took five stones to fight Goliath, it was because he had four brothers.

[@iancalandro8180]

"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you will become happy. If you get a bad one, you will become a philosopher." -Socrates What a guy...

[@JustinY.]

It's one of the known laws of the universe. If there's a person in myth, it turns into an anime character in Fate.

[@FainthedCherry]

AHA I CAUGHT YOU JUSTIN. Just a minute ago baby B)

[@Snakedude4life]

And a one in three chance: it’s a saber face.

[@oopsieloupsie]

Justin my boy

[@izanagino-okami8221]

@@Snakedude4life More like a 1/3 chance to grow breasts

[@rigormortiz5357]

I eɑt ɑ​s​s...

[@TheLeadhound]

Ah yes, my favorite myth: Socrates.

[@СаваСтанковић-с7к]

And his greatest Greek commoner haters PLATO AND ARISTOTLE

[@purplehaze2358]

0:53 For a second, I thought he was giving a uh…very different, reaction to seeing a beautiful woman.

[@maggintons]

If time travel is ever invented.. The greek philosophers **need** to start a podcast.

[@herzen9857]

"So today on the podcast we have-" "Guys, tell me, what's a horse" "Ah fuck not again..."

[@andrew_cunningham]

Diogenes would be the weird intermittent guest who eventually gets banned from the show for repeatedly drawing the conversation toward all the times he'd been arrested for publicly masturbating at political rallies.

[@Cushla-np4pt]

Caesar on the joe rogan show??? What will he say?? 😦

[@comradekenobi6908]

@@Cushla-np4pt "Why is people screaming my name Shiza? its Caesar, not Shiza you peasants. ALso what's JoJo"

Check out dead authors podcast

[@kekw6029]

"beautiful woman" *gives her Pyrocynical's face*

[@polygondwanaland8390]

f u r r y i n f l a t i o n r o l e p l a y

[@benjaminbustamante7924]

i see no problem, even better i wish i could see *more*

[@polygondwanaland8390]

@Vic Boyles I hope it's true because it's fucking hilarious

[@jeremiahw3170]

Pyro is innocent but he did confirm the fetish when posting receipts

[@UlyssesSGrant-nt9pr]

@Vic Boyles it is

[@nineel7395]

"not in the clan it's just a hood" Jesus fucking christ these ads. I'm crying.

[@unclecreepy4185]

Hades: I didn’t become God of the underworld and name this place Hades for you guys to go around calling it Hell.

[@primiorodriguez4935]

"Not in the clan , it's just a hood" these NordVPN adds are killing me man 🤣

[@TitoTitoTitoTito]

He wasn't lying in his first video ever, he would, eventually make 1 video a week

[@JustADioWhosAHeroForFun]

I still don't get why Zeus keeps banging mortals

[@Snakedude4life]

Gods are too weird. I mean, Zeus Ate his wife and Athena popped out of HIS forehead.

[@wahoo42069]

Horny ig

[@Debland1989]

They have lower expectations lol

[@Zorro9129]

Because mortals couldn't charge him child support.

[@UkuleleVillain]

Wouldn't you?

[@SamsarasArt]

Orpheus is that guy that brings an acoustic guitar to a college campus and tries to get people to think he's cool

[@PutkisenSetä]

Imagine being so bored, so bereft of music and merriment that some ponce with a lyre is the best shit to happen in years.

[@DAKmyname]

"My name's Orpheus, I'm blowing up on Spotify at the moment, you might have heard of me." "You're not on here." "Not that Spotify."

[@m.s.6967]

Anyway here's wonderwall