New Thoughts about Complex Trauma - Part 1/4

Tim shares 8 of the negative consequences of Complex Trauma.
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[@allissalopanec5994]

This is just the sort of reassurance I have been looking for that I have not lost my mind and my heart is good. Does anyone else feel like they can't find proper "professional" help for their PTSD because the pool of healthy "professionals" is nonexistent these days?

[@moriah1394]

YES. Moreover it takes a village.

[@keldoge]

I've been lucky enough to find a few good therapists. Interestingly, they've helped me navigate through more toxic psychiatrists/practitioners who were looking to diagnose me with weird ass disorders. It sucks that C-PTSD isn't in the DSM. It would really help straighten out toxic therapists.

[@Eric-tj3tg]

@@moriah1394 Agreed....you know of one? I need one as well.

[@Eric-tj3tg]

@@keldoge But IS, now, in the ICD-11(not sure about edition number). But the APA, as expressed in the present DSM, said, "-rejected He began this talk by quoting a doc who said (paraphrasing)

[@honestandfair1572]

I think it’s like getting a good pedicure hard to find but, we search until we do….

[@LoreMIpsum-vs6dx]

When I became serious about healing 19 years ago, these weren't even concepts yet. Clues were buried in attachment/bonding theory but I was told I was crazy. Now it is becoming mainstream. There is so much hope in this. It could change the world.

[@moriah1394]

So sorry and I understand some of that as I've struggled alone for nearly two decades since disfunction crippled me. Yes, mirages and clues and misdiagnosis and miseducated and no professionals understood, none that could afford or find at least. Since these disorders are created in relationship then they must too be healed in relationship, self-help only goes so far when one has no reference of up close healthy enough thoughts, feelings, skills etc. Groups can be validating AND without numerous healthy leaders/teachers groups don't have the resources to help one another move forward.

[@daniella_76]

Hi Lore, just a quick thank you for writing your comment as... following pages, forums (never speaking just watching) and researching constantly for the last 2 years, I can appreciate what you are saying. being UK based (stiff upper lip etc etc) there is very little understanding of C-PTSD let alone D.I.D (which I have just been , finally after years of being called "crazy") I suddenly see that FOR ONCE a similarity in just a sentence. Its never wrong to say a nice thing . ps, should anyone be interested, or not know, and so as to spread knowledge ...I would recommend (for research/information) Diane Lang Dr Allen Schore Colin Ross MD hope your journey of healing is going well Lore

[@LoreMIpsum-vs6dx]

@@daniella_76 Hi, thanks for the kind thoughts and the references to the other doctors. I've looked up some of their talks and bookmarked them for later.

[@lisaj5769]

@@daniella_76 Hi Vivienne, i also recommend Pete Walker. Finding Freedom and Pete Walker have been the most life-changing and eye opening resources for me. Pete Walker suffered from CPTSD himself, so a lot of the materials he has on his website, the articles he wrote, really illuminates the experiences/cause of CPTSD as if he took the words from my mouth and was experiencing it in my body. I wish you the best, and wish you healing and growth :)

[@KimFromSystemRaven]

I, too, found out my functional issues were related to there being more than one of me. I suspect this is much more common than currently understood by most professionals recognize. I had suspected this at times, but told it was too rare to be going on with me, plus I thought I'd be more aware of it than I was. I didn't get diagnosed until 48, but it's given me a framework for understanding what I used to think was just chaos and lack of self control. Understanding this has given me control over my life for the first time!

[@nadineo1983]

I swear this channel needs to be heard by everyone. I have complex-PTSD and it blows my mind how it's blatantly obvious so many people have complex trauma but it's widely ignored by the mental health professionals. It makes me have such distrust in the mental health field. They have the answers right in front of them but refuse to look at them. Dr. Nadine something (I forgot her last name) does a ted talk and talks about how ACE (adverse child experiences) screening should be routinely done with physicals starting with young children. And she is completely right. I'm not sure why complex-PTSD is not spreading like wildfire through the mental health community

[@Ann-pn9or]

they hand you a book and say read it. that's their answer.

[@winterwhite282]

This man is a tremendous gift. HAS a tremendous gift, also.

[@claireh.7605]

He is the Scotty Kilmer of being a mechanic for your own emotions!

[@toscatattertail9813]

AS someone with CPTSD and DID I have found that something that triggers anxiety or panic or dissociation is based in the Fear that the trauma associated with that sound, word, sight, smell, touch, location, temperature, particular body sensation is going to re-occur. To heal from complex trauma, you have to go in and face the trauma, look at it, see it for what it is and then go on. Don't tell someone "it's in the past, let it go" because until you discover the triggers and understand them, you are still going to have depression, addiction, panic reactions and everything else that goes with it.

[@stellabandante2727]

Makes me feel compassion for all of us - our parents who endured childhood trauma, our kids who felt the impacts of our own trauma, and ourselves who have felt broken and blamed for everything we've done, and the hopelessness that seems to be the result. The journey begins in ernest. Thanks for this info.

[@DEEPMOODYPURPLEBLUES]

The missing element in healing from c-ptsd/developmental trauma is supportive community. The Polyvagal theory explains this best, ime.

[@bellakrinkle9381]

I love Poly Vegal theory; I use it to verify my daily state of mind. Often times I can move up one level to the highest, by becoming totally emerged in a topic or hobby that I love; it's about being able to focus on a project. I have CPTSD.

[@lanishortsunshine5773]

I love focus....yay...

[@yourenough3]

I feel blessed to have found this channel and these talks. So validating.

[@sandra1761]

Tim is like a good surgeon cutting right through to the point.

[@yourenough3]

This is probably my 4th time listening to this. I am trying to be a good person and live the right way. I went from drinking everyday / every other day to being positive and walking 15000 steps and eating healthy and being productive but i am falling into drinking once every 3 weeks and then i feel guilt. I am so beyond dissapoined in myself and i am binge drinking today and i am so angry at myself and dissapointed. Will i ever be sober and clean for good? I have a 7 year old daughter i must change and be a good example and role model. I am so depressed and i.have anger! Thank tim

[@lauras1161]

Ciao lifeisajourney! I think you have done a great job! Love yourself for what you are and look at your strong parts. Sometimes we fall but what matters is the light we see and want to reach. You are definitely a good mum who is showing a strong love! Keep going ....Good luck❤️

[@lambchop2384]

I relate to all of these lectures on complex trauma. My dad was a raging violent alcoholic. I lived in terror and fear all through my childhood. Im looking forward to hearing how I can help myself out of my anxiety and depression, I’m so fed up feeling this way. I feel so little joy in living.

[@CMoore8539]

Lamb Chop I went through the same thing with my Mom. Take good care of yourself. The more that we learn, the more able we will be able to heal. I’ve been listening to him every day for the past six months and as I understand what it is wrong, it helped me to start doing things to help myself heal. You Will Get Better. I hope you have a Beautiful Easter Weekend!♥️

[@lambchop2384]

Cindy Moore Thank you! Good luck with your journey and have a lovely Easter too x

[@darcyhope8342]

Lamp chop My father was the same I was living in a war zone. The worst memory for me was my father in front of me I was 5 or 6 years old poured a kettle of boiling water over my mother. And I lived in terror as we never new what was going to happen when he came home. I spent many nights locked in the bathroom to keep him from us. My whole life has been affected I'm now slowly healing. I have fibromylagia and I'm a cancer survivor with auto immune illness. That man is spot on.

[@lambchop2384]

Deborah Holmes OMG, Deborah, that is so shocking to read! My heart goes out to you. We cannot explain to people around us who have never experienced this just how it affects us! I too have an autoimmune illness. I wish you all the best on your healing journey. Take care of yourself x

[@darcyhope8342]

Thank you lamb chopx And I wish you all the best on your journey. I have found CBD oil full spectrum Indica is helping me By taking the edge of my anxiety and fear and making me a bit more resilient so I feel I can concentrate on and cope on this journey of healing. I have a faith and have found that a great support. It took me a long time to put the pieces together to realise that I had CPTSD and why it had affected my adult life. This conference has made me cry but I will follow this amazing man. Good bless you x

[@Chess-ks8lk]

Complex trauma ruined my life. I was abused by my father throughout my entire childhood. Since puberty I've been depressed and suffered from chronic fatigue syndrom.

[@attheranch873]

It’s fight, flight, freeze and fawn.

[@nadinerhodda503]

Or fake (Act as if everything is OK or I am OK)

[@dRumpfsadouchebag]

And faint..

[@sallyann985]

@@dRumpfsadouchebag another fainter like me.

[@john316-tetelestai]

This is better then gold!!!

[@kateylewis8468]

Thanks for explaining this condition I have suffered for years people rarely understand people that suffer from this ❤️❤️

[@CMoore8539]

Thank you for sharing another Excellent Video Teaching!!!♥️ Tim, your teaching is helping me to understand myself and addiction more than I ever thought possible. This is the Best Teaching for addictions anywhere! I’m listening to you every single day and I’m slowly starting to heal. You are greatly appreciated!!! Two years clean and much more to learn.

[@TimFletcher]

Thanks Cindy

[@consultmlcesqful]

I am willing to do the work to resolve my CPTSD.

[@TheCandisr]

Childhood trauma accelerates the shortening of an individual's telomeres. Telemores are the protective coverings at the outside of the body's cells. Shorter telemores permit disease to flourish.

[@maureengauthier6553]

This is a great series and I so wish it would have been available when I was growing up so I possibly would have avoided marrying a Narcissist who mimicked my family of origin and kept me ingrained in a setting of what was familiar to me regardless of how dysfunctional it is and I and my five children wouldn't be as messed up because of it.

[@j.s.1816]

It takes a lot of work to make it through this. And the work/processing/healing isn't obvious. Even with a therapist, both the client and therapist have to be aware of the client's condition. I also recommend that minimizing the fact that the CPTSD sufferer is a victim is a counter productive cliche: "victim mentality". A person can acknowledge that they were victimized AND be willing to heal, but will probably have times that awareness of the victimization will be overwhelming. They need encouragement, not judgement and cliches, please.

[@anhpam9205]

Thank you so, so much for this wonderul talk. I am 61 and have finally woken up. It sure has been and remains a long haul. I enjoyed your lecture tremendously and your Canadian accent, too. ( am an ex pat). You give all of we 'messed up folks" so much compassion , understanding and hope. Maybe I will finally be able to turn the quagmire and sinkhole into a positive, godly mission as did the prophets of Israel!

[@Oaktreealley]

How can I find a proper therapist experienced with complex trauma??? I’ve been warned to be careful of therapists who commonly list things like ptsd, ocd, trauma as specialities (hardly anyone I’ve seen list complex trauma) when in reality they are not properly trained, and as a result can exacerbate issues. I even know a social worker who’s recently gone into counseling and lists a bunch of “specialties” after what seems a short training period. It seems absurd! Please how can we find a good therapist.?

[@TimonRamstein]

Thanks for that, its comforting. At the same time I struggle to find agency. It makes me feel powerless and as a victim of my brain and the past.

[@bellakrinkle9381]

Have you tried Meditation via Eckart Tolle? He reaches the ability to separate the Past and Future from the NOW.

[@sll110]

Yes, I am very very beautiful talented person, but always unbelievable miserable and with evils, this Channel helped me understand myself, but life still struggling

[@llove8283]

You have no idea what finding your channel has meant to me. In addition to a physically, verbally and emotionally abusive mother I was also spiritually abused. I grew up as a Jehova's Witness who teach even the youngest of children that the world is going to end any minute. Also only people who are JW's are going to live. I lived in very small town where i was the only Witness at my school, and instead of concentrating on school work I was terrified that Armagedon would come and I would have to watch my whole class and teacher be killed around me. My mother was the Witness but my dad was not so I "knew" that he was also going to die. So many people grew up like me and got out as adults, but when you do that they shun you. In one fell swoop you lose your family, friends and every person you have known your whole life. I hope that they find the comfort that I get from your explanation of complex trauma.

[@TimFletcher]

Thank you for sharing. I am glad the videos are helping.

[@FineFeatheredHomestead]

Light and sound are triggers for sure. The reason a low whisper triggers many is that it so often is the way a child is approached that led to abuse if it was family or someone else manipulative who they should have had reason to trust. Or, it reminds of the parent who wanted us to stifle the truth because it was too uncomfortable for them. The secrets, the pulse thumping and unbearable suffering in silence with knowledge and trauma you could not share followed that whisper. It is a very common symbol of the shame filled secrecy we bear, much like Achilles and his overwhelming world upon him. Forward, always forward, but never break the silence or the world falls. AND Yet, it's only by speaking and releasing our world and the shame that was never ours...abandoning it to whatever fate it entails...and daring to find real joy, self care, taking every thought captive (CBT & DBT), and learning that healthy people ask for help that we begin to stretch out to our natural height, release all that is not ours, and find a way to make peace with what is. Then, the world is our oyster...a delight, and a place of hope and opportunity! We don't reclaim our lives; we become more fully who we are meant to be.

[@FDroid01]

A cheerful heart does good like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones.

[@sharonparry5076]

After years of searching for healing finally have found it. Thank you

[@sue5158]

When I took my 1st drink at 12 it was the 1st time I felt ahhhhh, a calm. I thought it was THE ANSWER.

[@Pilgrim812]

Finally, the truth, the whole truth,and nothing but the truth

[@Eric-tj3tg]

As was stated, "it (healing from C-PTSD)is not for the feint of heart". Once you know enough, if you are "of the feint of heart", what now? You can't "unknow":that this is the hand you/I were dealt, and you/I must play this train-wreck. In my case, I've been trying to heal from this (quite imperfectly, of course),but these early defenses, implicit memories, the need of a village, and painful sensations,feel, as he said, so miserable that it brings up the question, "for what?" I'm now in my early 50's and am still trying: but for what? A less disturbing experience of existing? Is it worth it? I recall Joseph Campbell"s "The Hero with a Thousand Faces", and see this place between- where I feel myself to be, which aligns with Campbell's idea of "The Wasteland", the place one inhabits should he/she/I fail to heed the "call to adventure", akin I believe to experiences of leaving behind the known: experientially growing by learning more about the "self". Tough situation-I'm wishing for all of those in pain/suffering, healing, compassion and synchronicities which illuminate for all, our respective ways. Blessings.

[@honestandfair1572]

Great human

[@lb-xl1yp]

this is amazing, the content, the delivery, everything, thank you so much.

[@lukecarey613]

That was so validating.

[@TambriaMoore]

Thank you for one more healthy useful resource to help myself recover and rebuild. Working in homeless outreach, I experience a very very high rate of encountering folks with cptsd, probably higher than the rate of substance addiction you reference.

[@CMoore8539]

Tambria Moore That’s Awesome that you are helping others in an outreach. I’ve been helping others in my community too. When I get sad, I’ve learned to get busy helping others. It greatly helps. Take good care of you and Have a Beautiful Easter Weekend!♥️

[@farshadmasoomi3942]

I have CPTSD and I always wonder what percentage of the population is affected by it.

[@lanishortsunshine5773]

I value all that is said here its most helpful....i need a course. ....

[@jennifercoop938]

The trigger of low frequency could be from people who were whispered to during abuse, or the low threatening voice in the ear warning them not to tell

[@moriah1394]

A complex subject very well organized, comprehensive and well articulated . Hard to listen to cause he sounds like he is yelling. Gist is that complex trauma causes subconscious self and soul destroying default settings in : thinking emotions, and behaviors and recovery is an everyday job to become conscious of those settings and then change them.

[@abbywoolfson584]

Thank you. It’s a hard journey. I’m disappointed learning why I have been in therapy almost 3O years. I’m 65. I’m learning what it’s not my fault in this struggle . I am still in process. Thank you. Your teaching is very helpful. Thank you for bringing God into the teaching . It’s been torture .

[@riverwillowengel6563]

You have just described my whole life... i have offical diagnosis of BPD CPTSD CFS NESD FND..ADDICTIONS ANXIETYDEPRESSION. all from chronic years and years of abuse, neglect etc etc

[@laurentiurudeanu4102]

Beautiful series, excellent presentation, but is this complex trauma / CPTSD recent stuff, really? Has everybody forgotten about the theories of neuroses? Take Karen Horney's theory for instance, she lays out an incredibly accurate and brilliant picture of these same maladaptive processes that start early in child's life and of their evolution into the adult time into full blown neuroses, with the effects presented here in these clips. Funny thing is that neither CPTSD nor neurosis are not included in the DSM - quite a shame.

[@karstenburger9031]

I think you are right. Maybe Karen Horney is not so widely known.

[@gina333]

Oh my goodness, I just started with the whisper sensitivity this week. When people whisper it disturbs me on a scary deep level.

[@nishasankaran]

CPTSD/in Recovery 🙋

[@C-Span222]

Thank you!

[@Larindarr]

and this was 2019... imagine now..

[@consultmlcesqful]

Awesome! Thank you!

[@user-ov8lj5pn4x]

Thanks Tim very grateful !

[@tracicolomb]

Refreshingly updated information Tim. Quite the contrary effect that another might perceive of receiving this information, but my experience from this is the feeling of ‘normalcy’. Acceptance of my life’s decisions as ‘forgiveness’! I am able to view myself with a kindness through my changing for a Better Traci.

[@GemGrl]

I'm so greatful for these videos!

[@grumblekin]

I have hypersensitive interoception. I can feel my body operating and it upsets me at times. I also have superior senses of smell and hearing. My nervous system has hijacked my entire being to look for danger and to be ready always. God, it tires me to be alive.

[@survivaldoggy]

Thank you so much for this. For years i have known this was my problem, but couldn't figure out how to fix it. I wish i could speak directly to you for a couple hours to accelerate my healing. God bless.

[@lauraelzey6371]

Wow this was So encouraging to me! I feel as those this man was ready from my journal, except for the positive and happy ending. It’s true though. I believe when we have com formation that we aren’t just crazy or a lost cause cause others are explaining the exact thoughts, beliefs and behaviors we DO have, it lets us know that there is a way out of this pit with work and effort. And if anyone out there has cptsd the way I do, you Know you are tough and will fight for what is right and just more than the average joe. Iv been called hard headed most my life and well, to be honest, praise GOD for this characteristic of mine to turn my hard head of toxic shame, guilt, addictions etc into being hard head about having HOPE. We can do this guys. It didn’t take a day to get the way we are and it won’t take a day to fix it BUT we can be hopeful for the here and now as well as our future.

[@daveco4781]

Thank you.

[@pambrown5382]

Every report card said I wasn't applying myself, I couldn't learn, I thought I was stupid.

[@martinnottsperfectcoins1930]

god bless you

[@sll110]

yes, I never met you, but you are my best friend.

[@lanishortsunshine5773]

Sooo...lol...thays it...i feel awesome that i can see it now...my anger. Default...emotion......omg.....its sooo clear to me now....love n light ..to u. Tim..f. Love to you brother......

[@Enfpmom]

I have read Alice millers books and countless others can’t believe a pastor is more knowledgeable

[@andreamagyar5541]

He is good. I read and incorporated many books on the subject, love Alice Miller. Most people , I too, have, had no idea until they begin somewhere for a lot is this man.

[@maryanncoan4134]

ty for helping me understand why ive been getting triggered. its been awful, ive been at the end of what i think i can tolerate. the abuse had been so terrible.Im an ex counselor. i tried my best for the children knowing id been through trauma. people have no idea. after a difficult reltionship recently. i warned him. time to take care of me.

[@ecco8994]

Very good also certain jobs

[@zusterMalikaLithgow]

I know somebody who was abonded in boarding school from the age of 5. She saw her mother only on Christmas and summer holidays, from the age of 5 till the age of 15.

[@beyourbestyounowteresacoll6307]

AMEN

[@lisbethbird8268]

Thank you Tim, thank you findingfreedommedia

[@mikesmummy]

Its really not easy to seek and get good help with mental health , especially here in theUK .Gpthat i told me had bipolar for the past 6/7 year just palmed me off with antipshycotic meds which i hated but as ive always thought to myself its more like ptsd or maybe cptsd , It makes so much more sense and maybe still i have mild bipolar or perhaps adhd? but i dot have a good relationship with my doctor so avoid saying this to him its hard so hard every single day my behaviour causes more problems but i just try to get through the day , every day .

[@daniella_76]

Bang on with the UK thing Kelly!

[@mikesmummy]

@@daniella_76 Yes it's sad I'd try get appt 2 week ago and had to have telephone consultation bit u rang Tuesday, I was quite desperate😳😳😥 & the appt was for the following week on friday so I miss it as i forget , other things takeover .cant manage with any simple thing lately .😥😥😫😳😳had to call today and ask for meds they have no idea at all how hard every God damn day is ... xx

[@forgingstrength6119]

My son has ADHD, but his kicked in at 18 months and it was literally like a light switch flicked on and he went from a quiet, happy baby that was loved and cared for to bouncing all over etc. I thought it a phase, but he never grew out of it. I'm not sure it's rooted only in CPTSD.

[@dRumpfsadouchebag]

How can an 18 month old baby be diagnosed with ADHD? I'm curious... At 18 months they are just developing out of delta frequency to theta frequency in the brain.. 2 books i would recommend to read or look up summaries on are.. 1. Parenting from the inside out by daniel seigel 2. The science behind the art of psychotherapy by Alan shore Look up both authors on KZbin regarding early brain development in children At 18 months their limbic system is just turning on, so the most helpful thing to do is help them to develop self soothing techniques. Daniel seigel illustrates that very well in parenting from the inside out.. also a great read for parents to learn more about themselves.. 🙏

[@andreamagyar5541]

18 mo just the beginning of the no phase, it is normal,

[@jeffcalloni7621]

My wife is sure she has this...now she wants me to move out so she can heal from this....I'm just about at retirement...how is this even fair?

[@dRumpfsadouchebag]

At 20:17, he mentions of your dad was like a military general you were told what to think and if you did not you were in trouble, i have witnessed the same in people whose fathers were ministers, pastors and priest of the churches, many denominations.. down to what to wear, how to behave in public and many were under the unfortunate belief of 'spare the rod, spoil the child ' as these grown men reasoning to beat their children and those children witnessed how women were suppose to behave.. unfortunately those grown men were themselves once 5 year old boys who were told what to think and were also abused.. it's not about blame or fault, it's about how the environment was and how the individual child perceived their experience and made sense of it and this cause the brain to fire and wire during the formative developmental years to these unconscious conditioning, which lead to deeply ingrained subconscious beliefs(opinions), perceptions and behaviors... Unearthing these to notice then at the conscious level is the challenge, then rediscovering their true essence and making new healthy habits is the goal.. discovering how to take a fixed mindset and adjusting it to a growth mindset is an important key..

[@carolsanborn5332]

Low frequency tones are most associated with my Father's deep voice, which was muffled by his sinus problems. His tone was very serious most of the time, commanding a sober respect of his low tone of voice. Perhaps this should be looked at as a trigger for stress+fear behind complex trauma..

[@lindamaguire7795]

By contrast I find shrill and loud voices emotionally triggerring which might be linked to domestic abuse. occurring in very early childhood.

[@carolsanborn5332]

@@lindamaguire7795 I'm sorry to hear that, no pun intended, Linda. everyone has their particular triggers. The only thing that helps me overcome trauma of any kind is reminding myself that this life is so short, + my hope is in eternity with the Lord. Because I trust in the outcome that the Bible promises those who love Christ, I place my faith in Jesus when I'm faced with any situation that is stressful. I hope you can find calm + peace that passes all human understanding. God bless.🙏

[@jackiewalz4990]

can you please do an episode more in depth on domestic violence and how complex trauma effects a victim of it. i relate to a lot of what your saying but you typically talk about a child.. i was young when a lot of my trauma happened so i feel a lot of what you say still applies.. im not sure really what to ask for, im just want to understand what im going through

[@TimFletcher]

I am going to start a series on anger and abuse in a month, as soon as I complete the series on codependency

[@georgiewatson8688]

Yep, very sensitive to noise to the point i've had to move many times because i have zero tolerance to doors banging (really bad with this esp cos one of my recurring sleep paralysis episodes always starts with the banging of a door) and other people's music or talking on the phone, omg, i go from "normal" to major and i mean MAJOR irritation and anxiety *immediately*. In lockdown i was living in a shared flat, an HMO in east london and this little shit of an 18 year old moved in with us and he was so noisy i ended up leaving. I would tell the landlord about the noise (after i spoke to the little f**cker and he didn't amend his behaviour) and the landlord didn't seem to give a shit so i left. It's a real problem when you can't afford to live alone in a derached farmhouse in the countryside! I can't wear earplugs, they just highlight my wheezing chest from too much smoking and i can never fall asleep with them in! Eugh 😢

[@boxelder9167]

Like eating chocolate ice cream in a $hit storm I am making my way down to the good parts.

[@boxelder9167]

ikonig - The $hit storm is the lies you get fed under the trauma. That’s the part that sticks and stinks and contaminated everything. Then that gets scraped off and the person underneath is an amazing person who survived 10 years of torture starting at age 6. And the person I discovered was abused but is not the abuse. I survived, I got out, I won. I felt like a looser but I got away, I escaped and preserved myself. I made it without love or support from my family. I am my own hero and didn’t realize it because all I could see was myself with my head being held underwater by the adults in my life trying to break me and I felt afraid.

[@Chris-yf2zs]

25:30 gift of cann addiction

[@mtloke5732]

What do you mean by "beauty of soul" for those who went through complex trauma versus those who didn't go through it?

[@Maureenieee]

this is me at 51. my life is a disaster and still no support. I can feel that I've given up. I'm dead already I drag this carcass thru life waiting for my body to die. I get called drama queen, crazy, and I hate me. I wan't help and i don't even have the energy to go get it anymore. and trust me no one's coming to my house to help me. my son just told me I was a drug addict and a piece of shit last week it's just never ending

[@stevejohnson743]

There's hope! If you can, take the LIFT program. It's wonderful. If you can't take the course, keep listening to Tim's videos. But the course is a huge help with the community and support people in our circumstances need.

[@user-tl4ke8yr1d]

It is hard it is so incredibly tough to go through this healing process but what's my other option, really what else do I have to do

[@rachelamiranda1333]

Hello Tim,, my name is Rachel, im 53yrs old,, and dealing with childhood trauma,, for the first time ,, I was wondering if you have a program in Sacramento ,Calif,, ???

[@TimFletcher]

Not at this time, but we do have an online treatment program - LIFT lift-online-learning-by-react.teachable.com/courses Or email [e-mail]

[@lischristensen848]

It is so amazing what you are saying, so very helpful. I do have a very difficult time listening though, because you are shouting. Could you please, please talk in a normal voice, so i can keep listening to you, which i would so like.

[@winterwhite282]

I understand....you're going to have to imagine him not having a microphone.......turn down your volume to LOW...it's easier.

[@chez5860]

Whispering and more than that, repetitive sounds send me to space!

[@babs6379]

Great talk, only thing I can’t agree with is that jephtah sacrificed his daughter in the meaning you presented. Human sacrifices were disgusting to god and he wouldn’t have blessed them. The sacrifice was that as the daughter was sacrificed to service in gods sanctuary she wouldn’t have her own family and children- that’s why she wept over her virginity not over her death. Also it would have been a sacrifice in a way that the family line would die with her, as she was the only child herself. On top of that her companions visited her every year to give commendation. But the cots talk- amazing. Thank you 😁

[@franwilliams4306]

Watching closely.

[@honestandfair1572]

We’re you in my house sir? :(

[@CS-jm5xr]

Whispers trigger me because it’s usually not loud enough to overpower the thoughts in my head.

[@sandarahcatmom9897]

So sorry this had to lapse into religiosity; there is spiritual healing that doesn't have to be religious. The beginning explanation of CPTSD is great but I won't listen to the rest of his videos tho. Religion mostly serves to move people away from the god of their own understanding, or way of being in the world by supplanting it with the ideas and interpretations (dogma, rules, fear, admonitions) of others. Sad and adds to CPTSD for many.

[@SarahDale111]

I had no religious upbringing and I really love Tim's explanations of the bible stories. The 23rd psalm was fantastic. A system of faith and worship (religion) is not at all the same as a simple story used to illustrate a moral or spiritual lesson (parable). But to each their own, I suppose.

[@jenrich111]

I wanted a bit more science. Got a bit bible bashing. Relax your voice a little. Lean back. You got this 🙂🔥

[@happyone444able]

I greatly appreciate Tim’s work! However, I don’t agree that narcissistic personality disorder comes from childhood trauma. It is a SOUL DERANGEMENT. They are infested with evil, and service to self. They ALL play out from the same “book”, and it seems like these creatures have a “hive mind”. Everyone who has endured severe trauma does this. It’s a spiritual matter and a soul derangement. There’s no fixing them.

[@stephenburgess5710]

Wow, really disappointed that you tacked on a Christian sermon at the end of this program, nearly just as long as the original video itself. I am not Christian. I have no problem with people sharing Christian videos on line, whatsoever. But to tag Christian proselytizing on the end of a video about people looking for mental health, that seems very manipulative to me. Highly disappointed, will not continue to listen due to this uncalled for bait-and-switch. It doesn't even say in the description that half of this video is a Christian sermon.

[@lisbethbird8268]

I think Jesus was a bhodisatva.Doesn't mean I buy into the whole thing. History, patriarchy, and exploitative social systems have corrupted the content. Don't toss the baby with the bathwater! Sincere best wishes.

[@stephenburgess5710]

​@@lisbethbird8268 He was using some really anti-women, sex-shaming rhetoric in this talk and I really don't appreciate it being tacked on to the end of something of people looking for help dealing with trauma.

[@Ryan-ob6gp]

Have to agree. If anything the fairy tale stories after the informative talk can only serve to undermine credibility for the extremely important and underreported topic of CPTSD.

[@sallyann985]

A picture halfway through comes up that literally says "Christian teaching for those interested". How is that manipulating? You're just on the wrong channel. The guy is a pastor and the lecture is meant to be faith based.

[@visualapologetics4891]

If you don’t like it, turn it off. Find another channel. Find someone who shares your own belief system. Nobody’s forcing any of you to be here. Move on.

[@fortheanimals3981]

Why all of the "God" talk? You can use any other fictional book as a metaphor. This is offensive. Thanks for trying to understand us.

[@j.s.1816]

I'm guessing that he was speaking to some type of evangelical conference or even a church congregation. It would be nice if that was made clear at the start, though the information is helpful.

[@fortheanimals3981]

@@j.s.1816 I was trying to just take in the information that, like you, I thought was helpful. I tried to hang in there with a few of the "god" and biblical metaphors, but they just kept coming. There wasn't enough useful information to balance that out, which is unfortunate.

[@sallyann985]

It's not offensive. Tim Fletcher is a pastor and works in addiction. You're just on the wrong channel.

[@fortheanimals3981]

@@sallyann985 No wonder! If I'd known he was a pastor (delusional), I wouldn't have wasted my time.

[@sallyann985]

@@fortheanimals3981 a picture literally comes up halfway through the video warning you that the second part is gonna be faith based ("Christian teaching for those interested"). Since you weren't interested you could've just skipped it. You're the delusional one if you want to throw away a perfectly good talk just because you don't like someone's religion and don't understand what channel you're on. There's probably a service going on right now down the street from you, is that offensive too? Give me a break.

[@22juguetona12]

SO glad i found this video, im learning so much.

[@user-sm4uw9rx4u]

Thank you.