r/AmITheA**hole Boyfriend Broke Up With Me So I Cancelled Surprise Vegas Trip, He's Angry r/AITA

[@JSainte17]

“You’re a horrible girlfriend for not paying for me to fly to Vegas when you were no longer my girlfriend.”. 👌🏻

[@kimmieevans3598]

Hahaaha

[@Nerdbookworm]

Peak male thinking

[@Mewse1203]

Story 1: NTA He broke up with her. What did he expect to happen? Why did she even get back with him? He's a douche canoe

[@songohan3321]

I didn't know Las Vegas opened back up.

[@Original_Tenshi_Chan]

@@songohan3321 Yeah, we reopened in like June of 2020, but really it was only the casinos that reopened. (most mom and pop shops, stores, and restaurants had to remain closed) Hell, Mayor carol Notgoodman wanted to keep everything open at 100% capacity from day 1 of the pandemic until the last person dies of COVID. She even volunteered us as test subjects to any experiment trump wanted, because "Vegas is eager to get back into the swing of things". Luckily our Governor has more sense than that greedy conwoman whose only claim to fame is marrying a mob attorney and then being his handpicked successor to the Mayorship. (Hint: She isn't well-liked here, except for by the rich executives of the Casinos and maybe a few real estate developers, and for very good reason. She doesn't do ANYTHING with the best interest of Las Vegans in mind. Her and her husband, Oscar, even shut down our ONLY Level 1 Trauma unit hospital in Southern NV, claiming it cost "taxpayers too much" - it didn't - but then "generously" allowed it to reopen when HE got into a serious accident and needed a, shock of all shocks, Level 1 Trauma Unit Hospital. They are pieces of shit, is the moral of the story.)

[@xTwilightWolvesx]

@@Original_Tenshi_Chan At least karma bit Oscar hard. I hope the unit has remained open since.

[@anonymousbrooks8194]

Hold up girl, he broke up with you, he accused you of cheating out of nowhere, and now expects to get a free trip to Vegas. Where we do that at?

[@heyitssav2321]

Periodt like miss ma’am no kick him to the curb

[@zerobolt9506]

"He" Edit: wait are you talking about the trip story?

[@joimumu]

When someone accused anyone of cheating then it almost always because they have been cheating themselves

[@isarosa.45678]

All of this

[@erickaennis2738]

That's what I want to know. Dude has more balls than a brass assed monkey. 😂😂😂 The entitlement is strong here.

[@Itzelhaim]

First story : He broke up with you. Till he noticed he got a free trip. He back tracked. Don't take him back he's not worth your time.

[@pk.002]

This. OP is obviously NTA in this situation.

[@Doublemonk0506]

And when OP offered to cancel their own trio to Vegas, the bf still refused. How selfish is he?

[@Itzelhaim]

He accused her of cheating. Here's a thought he probably cheating himself. Then there's another thing he keeps losing his temper and screaming at OP. He doesn't deserve to go on a trip with his attitude.

[@kono_dust_da8180]

Not to defend the boyfriend but He didn't even know about the trip at the time. So that not the reason he got back together with her.

[@pippo17173]

@Melody Ackerman Oh gee, can't wait for a update where its revealed of that later and get even more karma throwing there.

[@LeggoMyGekko]

In story 4, everyone seems to be glossing over the fact that OP was told they’d be kicked out for doing what sister is doing, which I think is the main problem here. OP doesn’t want sister to be homeless. OP doesn’t judge sister for struggling. OP just feels like the parents put wayyy more pressure on them than sister, and that’s really unfair!! The parents are the only AH in this story. It’s already fucked up to tell your kid you’ll kick them out, but then to have a completely different standard/expectation for the other kid and use the pandemic as an excuse when you’re called out on it? And try to make OP comfort her despite this? OP has every right to be angry, upset, salty and it’s because of the uneven expectations set by the parents. OP deserves a sincere apology from them. Whatever sister may be going through, whatever reason there may be, it’s the principle of fair treatment and acknowledgement. I’d be upset too!

[@Doublemonk0506]

Even monkeys can know when something is unfair. There was this experiment where two monkeys were given a task, and they would be rewarded with a cucumber. During the experiment, one monkey was given grapes instead of cucumbers. The result was that the monkey who only got cucumbers got angry and started throwing a tantrum. Those same principles are in play in the story, thus science proves that OP is not in the wrong

[@1775LostOne]

I agree! Plus, the sister didn't log in for 2 weeks, was partying, putting family in danger, sleeping in, and yet now the parents are concerned? These people have their priorities screwed. I'm not a specialist so I'm not going to say the sister has something going because, I don't know her. I know from my life that when I slept in and slacked off it was genuine laziness. I knew how to play my parents so I could get away with the least amount of work possible. She could be doing the same. Whatever is going on with her, I hope she turns it around. Even if she has a mental illness, it will still be up to her to listen to the therapist/psychiatrist in order to recover

[@layronmccoy8708]

I was just about to say this. People often focus on the wrong thing, and most people did here. It wasn't about Op's sister missing class, it was about the clear difference in treatment of two people who have mental health issues. One gets threatened with being kicked out, the other gets understanding and concern.

[@mariannecormier3021]

you're right.

[@tippytoe1250]

Yep and OP herself was diagnosed with depression. The sister is the gold child. Glad OP called her mom out on it. Even though her mom won’t acknowledge the favoritism

[@kimberlyheinz865]

To story two: I have a dog and honestly dogs do more damage than just dog hair. They scratch up the seats and plastic with their nails. It’s not their fault and it’s not on purpose but it’s not something they can control. If the brother has leather seats they’ll be ruined soooo NTA

[@horsemaddd]

Story 2, so agree with Mark. I'd be so grateful if someone found a missing pet. I wouldn't care if they didn't drop the pup off and I'd hug them.

[@MaRi-dz4fu]

Story 1: NTA, but if OP keeps treating this 35 y.o. man like a child, he’s gonna continue throwing tantrums like a spoilt brat. Why not stop paying for his trips and justifying his shitty behavior like he doesn’t know what he’s doing.

[@melissasanchez2270]

I am so glad you stood up for OP and the found dog. The sister could have offered to detail the brother's car if he would drop the dog off. Not the ahole.

[@MarionHogan-m5i]

Agreed, OP found her dog so she has no right to be acting so self righteous instead of grateful. Also well done Mark for protecting Poppy

[@justinjones-smith5168]

Story 4: NTA. I wonder who the Golden Child is.

[@MaRi-dz4fu]

Well said

[@Russman67]

I think you're onto something here. 🤔

[@alexisgrunden1556]

*_DING-DING-DING-DING-DING!!_* Tell him what he's won, Bob!!

[@joimumu]

Finding the Golden Child is about as hard as finding Wally in where is Wally Covid version

[@bluedragonfly8139]

Right?

[@jayc7171]

S2; Errrr it has me conflicted It depends on how much longer she had to work, how long he was willing to wait and what her job is for me to make a final decision

[@onlyoddity]

We may not know how long until she got off work, but he said he'd wait *however long he had to* until she was able to pick him up. The guy has a new car, and the stench if wet dog sticks for weeks. Honestly, I understand why he'd say no to driving the dog back

[@toffiet3347]

I thaught it was an esh. I get her being mad from the way I heard it it sounded like she was very entitled. I however would be so so annoyed if my brother pulled something like that. I also think it's important to know what type of job she has, I know that the job my brother has would not let him leave for a dog however my nephews job may let him leave for a dog (brother works in a factory building cars and nephew in a shop)

[@jessbeingme8155]

Personally I would tell the sister 'if I drop off your dog, you're paying for my car detailing, it's a delivery fee, venmo me the money first'

[@JSainte17]

@@onlyoddity Actually, he didn’t agree to wait “however long”. He said at the time that he said this: “I said I didn’t mind waiting a bit”. After the situation, and only in the story to us does he state “I honestly didn’t mind waiting for however long...”. Also, It’s not like he’s allergic. What if she worked somewhere where she couldn’t leave? What if she still had hours left of her shift? He sucks.

[@krism8335]

@@JSainte17 it's not the brother's responsibility to even search for the dog he could have just went one with his day the sister is entitled af her dog her responsibility to go fetch it nobody owes her doggy transport

[@brandi5126]

Story 4: NTA. Even if the sister does have depression it doesn’t excuse the fact that it is her fault she got kicked out of uni. Asking for help and seeking treatment when you are sick or mentally ill is your responsibility to do unless your mental illness causes you to lose consciousness of yourself in episodes (like bipolar, schizophrenia, etc) Lots of people I love and myself live with clinical depression but we don’t allow it to stop us going to work or handling our responsibilities in favor us doing substances and partying. That is just irresponsible. Sister can grow up. It is your job to work on getting better and if you mental illness is interrupting your ability to take care of your responsibilities then go talk to your doctor.

[@izzlebizzle9581]

Exactly. I was severely emotionally and physically abused during college, only attended 40% of my classes and still managed to get a C through perseverance and hard work. Got kicked out during my 3rd year retake, did I blame anyone but myself? No, because it was my responsibility and mine alone to make sure that I put the work in or made the appropriate accommodations with school to make sure I was supported and able to continue. The sister has no-one to blame but herself. Oh and the parents double-standard is disgusting

[@FoxyMomma4ever]

@@izzlebizzle9581 Preach!

[@thedestroyasystem]

I would argue that even in cases where you were out of control, the consequences are still your responsibility. I can understand asking a little leniency if it didn't harm anyone else, like the university thing. But if it did hurt someone else? That person is not going to forgive or forget because you couldn't control yourself. They are a real person who really got hurt because of your actions. The action may not be your fault, but it is your fault if you have recognized there is a problem and failed to get help. Even if this is not the case, the consequences are YOUR responsibility, no one else's. Refusing to own up to that, or even worse, placing the blame on others, is most certainly your fault. (you as in the hypothetical mentally ill person, not you brandi)

[@owl7072]

Story 4: Parents, for literally no reason: Op if you get dropped we're dropping you as well 😌 good luck finding somewhere to live if that happens Op: Sister: **gets dropped by knowingly going to parties and skipping classes ** Parents: Aw our poor wittle precious baby! Oh you poor thing! It's okay it wasn't your fault! How could our darling little baby ever do any wrong! Oh she was going to parties over the weekend and skipping classes? That's okay cause we wouldn't want our precious little angelic darling of a baby girl to miss out on dating and be single forever now would we?!🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 Op: But you said- Parents: Shut it we don't know what you're talking about 😌🥺

[@FoxyMomma4ever]

That pretty much sums it up.

[@Chiller-pc1dv]

Accurate

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

That was so accurate, it's scary. O⁠_⁠o

[@AIBot929]

Last story. NTA... I get being depressed but at what point is she responsible for her own mistakes... if you don't show up to work for two weeks or not pay your rent there are consequences. She doesn't need coddling she needs professional help, and telling her it's not her fault isn't helping her in anyway

[@heleneclark563]

2nd Story: Your suggestion about OP’s sister going to her boss asking to leave early. You got to understand that not everyone’s job is that flexible. Some employees can’t just get up and leave.

[@putuananda1220]

But still. If you were lost one of your pet and some body found it. You would be gratefull even if you need to pick it up

[@putuananda1220]

Even though they cant pick up the dog while they are working. But still they can pick it up after work

[@ericaschaidt8588]

@@putuananda1220 exactly, and OP said they’d wait there as long as it took, so they could have finished working THEN gone and picked up he dog.

[@GiantProcrastiNation]

@@ericaschaidt8588 people seem to be glossing over the fact that he was completely willing to wait a couple hours with the dog so his sister could pick it up after she got off work. He wasn't telling her she needed to get the dog now because he doesn't want a dog in the car

[@ericaschaidt8588]

@@GiantProcrastiNation EXACTLY! Selective reading(listening) at its finest. Had OP said "be here in 10 or else I'm taking the dog to be put down/leaving it here" Then ya OK. That's a dick move. However they had no issue waiting until the dog could be picked up.

[@WolframKKM]

Story 4: NTA, let's set aside the complete double standard OP's parents have between their kids (because reddit commenters sure glossed over that bit). You know what sis' behaviour could also indicate? An entitled university student who thinks they're owed a degree just for enroling. Anyone who's been to uni knows at least one of these people - they have every excuse under the sun for why they can't show up to lectures or meet deadlines but have no problem making time to fuck around with their friends and party. Something bad happens as a result? They expect everyone to drop everything and rush to their aid - whether it's being their shoulder to cry on or editing an essay for them. The fact of the matter is, what's done is done and sis needs to take responsibility for what she did, whether there were extenuating circumstances or not. Coddling her isn't going to help with that, just reassure her that her behaviour was ok and she doesn't need to change anything. If she needs help, have a hard conversation with her. If she's just being a brat, have a harder conversation.

[@marinam3809]

Story 4: NTA at all. As an online college student, this infuriated me. Yeah, I’m tired, I’m mentally ill, I miss my friends and family, hell, I was hospitalized because of stress. Accountability is key, though I give half of not more of the blame to their mom, she is enabling her instead of trying to help her. Understanding rather than trying to help is just enabling, they don’t have to actively council her, but at least try to find her a doctor, a councillor or something.

[@paulinadeboer3604]

you miss your friends is not a reason for a depression if you go out with them every week. It is more that this girl has changed to a partygirl without thinking of the consequenties of her actions. I have teens in my house. They are lazy if i give them a change they would sleep during school. THAT is not how it works. Her parents saying it schools fault is logic. Cause the ones to blame are the parent. They let her sister slack, allowed this behavior. If they thought it was a depression then they neglect the need for therapy. So NO it is not the schools fault it is the parents fault. OP was not the AH

[@TheZombifiedFairy]

Story 4: NTA. She's sleeping all day because she's PARTYING all night!!! Thats not depression, thats laziness. If you can get up for a party, you can get up for a class. She lacks self discipline and wants to find excuse for her short comings.

[@FoxyMomma4ever]

I couldn't agree more!!

[@Chiller-pc1dv]

Even if it was depression, or any other mental illness....it's still not an excuse and still her own damn fault.

[@alexisjardine4930]

I hate how Reddit diagnoses people. "Have empathy for your sister, she's obviously struggling with mental health issues." Well, where's the empathy for OP who has an ACTUAL DIAGNOSIS?

[@FoxyMomma4ever]

@@alexisjardine4930 I know, right?!? The people of Reddit really need a reality check. They’re so biased and very quick to judge. I get that the AITA subreddit is people asking others to judge them but there’s a lot of self righteous people who are a bit too harsh with their judgments.

[@KG-VanityInKnickers]

Thank you for saying this!! Not every type of avoidance is a mental health issue!! Apparently she made partying a priority. If she was sleeping day AND night, then yah, that would be a clear sign that something was wrong.

[@joycetaepke2533]

Unfortunately, many managers would NOT allow someone to leave work to get their dog. It’s highly possible that someone could endanger their job by leaving.

[@josemadera3138]

Sounds like a personal problem honestly if it's ur dog go pick him up it's ur responsibility if ur goin to get fired it's ur responsibility to get someone to Go get it u can't force someone to gaf about ur dog

[@tiffanyortiz80]

Right I agree also why does the owner have to come out of pocket to remove dirt and hair from their seats.

[@stephanniestarr717]

Granted. But how does it make him the arsehole? He was willing to wait forever so they could come get their dog. It's not like they would have seen the dog any sooner if he had dropped the dog off at the sister’s house. The dog would have been there, alone. The bro stayed with the dog... Good on him!

[@joycetaepke2533]

@@stephanniestarr717 I agree that it was good of him to stay with the dog and I never actually said he was an a-hole. I was simply pointing out that it might not have been an easy thing to drop work to retrieve the dog. I guess I’m just putting myself in his place. I would have taken the dog and, if the dog had gotten the car dirty, I would’ve asked the owners to have my car cleaned. Not exactly a huge problem in the long run.

[@dragonriderabens9761]

Am I the only one paying attention to the fact that OP clearly stated that they would wait however long for the sister to pick up the dog herself, and even backed that up by patiently waiting 15 minutes with only the sister being upset about it? Sister could have picked up the dog after her shift, and OP would have waited

[@cynderthenerd]

Oof the whole "You're overreacting" thing when someone makes a gross sexual joke/comment, I hate that! Even if it seems like its not a big deal to him, its clearly a big deal to her and really bothered her, how hard is it to just say "I'm sorry"?

[@bluedragonfly8139]

The fact that she had to *tell him* not to touch strange women just creeped me out soo much. Like, I've had to tell dudes not to do that before, and lots of them took offense. Like, dude, I don' t like being touched or hugged by *anyone * I don't know, no matter who they are!

[@cynderthenerd]

@@bluedragonfly8139 people👏have👏boundaries👏 is it so hard for people to respect that??

[@selfproclaimedratking3667]

Story 4: You don’t just immediately stop sympathizing with your sibling when something happens; that stuff builds over time as you see them continually make stupid choices and get babied when the consequences come. I’m not saying the sister was actively making a choice to skip nor am I ruling out mental health. But I completely understand how op’s feeling bc I’m currently feeling something similar w my own siblings. There’s always a build up, and it usually presents itself at the worst times and you find yourself ALMOST completely apathetic. NTA at all.

[@protoskeeper]

Story 4: While the daughter might very well have mental health issues OP is NTA here but the Mom most definitely is. This reeks of resentment for a golden child dynamic. OP also has diagnosed mental health issues and he was told if he gets dropped he is out. His sister is being coddled instead and they PUSH him to the edge telling him he should make her feel better. While yes, her mental health issues should be addressed and he should be a bit more empathetic, I can still fully understand him exploding by constantly being pushed, especially when it seems so unfair.

[@kevinskidmore168]

No no no he is definitely not the asshole for not letting the dog in his car. OP sat with the dog and was willing to wait as long as needed because he knew that him not letting dog in his car was an inconvenience. I’m not about to let a dirty dog into my new car when there’s a reasonable solution available

[@shadowscall7758]

He literally made them leave work in the middle of them working. They could have had HOURS left on their shifts, would he really have been willing to wait HOURS for them to get off of work?

[@songohan3321]

Yes. Thank you.

[@bwill887]

@@shadowscall7758 Possibly because he thought they dropped the dog off there. The story is off and the OP likely thinks so too, based on the comment of the missing collar. It is unlikely that the man in the park stole the dog and just sat there waiting for the owner. Yeah he made his sister leave work, but he has no obligation to bring a lost pet back to the owners. More importantly, he probably wanted to verify if the family really cared about their pet. While he could have driven the dog back and cleaned his car later, the apathy shown by the sister is off. If I found my missing animal, I would definitely get over there to pick up my pet.

[@shadowscall7758]

@@bwill887 There was no apathy...some jobs will not let you just "leave for a few minutes" without risking severe consequences. For example, I had a job as a direct support professional several years ago and I had to watch several people who could not be left alone for any length of time without risking them doing things that would be harmful to them. As I was the only one available, I could not leave for any reason and if something came up and I needed a replacement, it was a minimum of 1.5 - 2 hours to find someone IF someone could be found. All my breaks and lunches were on site. If I had just left without telling anyone, I would have been risking getting instantly fired and/or being charged criminally if something had happened and one of them hurt themselves.

[@silverwurm]

Story 4: “Maybe your parents know something you don’t” That’s nice. When they showed a blatant double standard and pushed op repeatedly to comfort sister, op now has a right to said knowledge. “Your sister is struggling with mental health issues. School is too hard for her right now. We’ve gotten her some help” is an acceptable explanation “The classes were too hard” is not

[@bluedragonfly8139]

Yes! Also 'the school was too strict'! Like, it was *two full weeks* of not showing up! Were they supposed to keep her in classes until she decided to log in one day?

[@cyrilenejones8487]

The college sisters -why exactly can she get up and go partying but can’t just log on to a computer. I am so tired of everything and everyone blaming shit on mental health

[@ineedhoez]

Amen

[@hydeparkacademy7107]

2nd story: NTA. You FOUND her lost dog, sent her a picture, and waited with the dog to keep it safe. Does she not get that you could have just sent her a "hey, saw a dog that looked kinda like yours at X location" and still been a hero. She owes you an apology, and a finder's fee.

[@emmablue2181]

Story 4: I have depression and mental illness is no excuse to go out and party during a pandemic, ever. NTA.

[@thedestroyasystem]

exactly. It's an explanation; not an excuse. And even then I can't imagine a depressed person being too exhausted with everyday life, but then being like, "oh a party? Something that's loud and social where I'll have to be active? Count me in!" She just sounds lazy.

[@scifiwriter6092]

I completely agree with you about the dog. They weren't at all grateful about him finding it. My dad is allergic to dogs, so I wouldn't dream of letting a dog into my car. I never know when he may need to ride in or borrow it. Also, cleaning mud off of cloth seats can be nearly impossible.

[@25Erix]

Second story: you're thinking of a Shetland sheepdog, aka a Sheltie.

[@Cottontailart]

The lost dog story, she could have a job where the boss isn’t very nice, I had a no pet rule in mine but I would have charged for any professional cleaning if I was so concerned

[@Cottontailart]

@@zorro-tramposo2652 I can’t remember what the video was about to say anymore sorry

[@Lillypop93]

Story one bf is cheating 100% and if she goes without him he'll use it as an excuse to doubt her loyalty

[@jgw5491]

Not if she breaks up with him for real. :-D

[@BeastlyEevee]

2nd story, nta, I'm with Mark. I'd have run so fast to get to my pooch, I wouldn't even WANT to wait or have my dog dropped off at my place. I want to hold my precious bean dammit

[@vampire9545]

NTA for dog one. He FOUND the dog, if they cared so much about their dog they wouldn't have cared to leave. At least that's how I'd feel about my cats.

[@JustCC6057]

Mark, the solution IS to teach Poppy to sit and stay when other dogs do that. Her running away is the biggest fun for the other dog, and they get so focused on Catch Catch Catch (the bites on the back legs) that they forget reason for a bit. It is kind of an instinct. He would not have done anything else. The low on the ground is a play signal just fyi, he wasn't hunting her.

[@bashmentqueen7894]

Dog story: NTA. His car, his rules. Simple. The dog was dirty🙄

[@Koji-Alistair]

Exactly, I don't know why these people are getting so bent out of shape are they going to pay to get the stains out of his car.

[@ta_nya5240]

For story 2, I agree with Mark. Nobody's an AH for not putting a dog in their car. We don't know how long of a drive it would have been and honestly, just 10 minutes in and the entire car just smells and it's not easy to get that kind of thing out again. Plus, you don't know if the dog won't get bored/irritated and start "nibbling" on some of the interior. If it's a very serious situation, I will do it, but I would still rather the owner of the dog be present, if that is at all possible. Generally, though, I would avoid that kind of thing as much as possible.

[@dallen3000]

Story 4: Ok what if it's depression or another mental health issue? It still sounds like she's an adult that needs to take responsibility for her own actions. Has she informed the school of her issues? She's been a no call no show for 2 weeks and apparently that's the school being too harsh on her? A little sympathy in these times are necessary, but the diagnosed depression person is told that she will be kicked out if she drops out, but the the other child can go to weekly parties, do drugs, and ditch class; but now's the time to comfort her? Sounds like favoritism to me.

[@jdd9993]

Skipping TWO WEEKS of online schooling is ridiculous. Her parents should get her some help if she is indeed depressed.

[@ice1055]

1st story: moocher didn’t even pay for his own ticket so what was he going to go gambling for? If he had no money. The trip is originally for OP so why should she pay for her deadbeat boyfriends ticket if he’s just going to treat her like trash. DUMP HIM

[@DD-wd2ep]

Women spoil these infantalized, broke manchild boyfriends way too much. He should be spoiling HER and treating her on a trip. I could see going all out for a good husband, but a boyfriend (that acts like a jerk too)...no way in hell.

[@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax]

@@DD-wd2ep Ahhhh NO. Why SHOULD he spoil her and pay for the trip if the reason for her going is to give her friend & new baby support while her husband was gambling? You sound like a femanazi, giving real women a bad name! What happened to EQUALITY? Only when it benefits you?

[@DD-wd2ep]

@@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax You must be broke like the boyfriend 😂. Real men take care of their women.

[@iatearoachtoday8864]

@@DD-wd2ep No. No one should be spoiling anyone, if they're a couple, then they need to both treat each other with respect

[@DaZebraffe]

On the dog in the car story, I have to agree with you on going against the grain: All those people saying "It's just a little mud and hair" have clearly never tried to get either of those things out of upholstery, or seen the price tag on paying somebody else to do so for you. Plus, everything you said. Wench should've considered herself lucky her brother was considerate enough to take who-knows-how-long out of his day to sit there and keep a friggin' dog entertained long enough for her to finish work, then drive over to get the dog. That's insanely generous. And this is coming from somebody who loves dogs!

[@DaZebraffe]

Oh, and to the personal story you shared right after: Once again, completely agree with you. If you know your dog is the sort to get in other dogs' personal space, you need to keep your dog on a leash. 'cause you never know when another person's dog is gonna' take that personally and take a chomp out of your dog's face. Or run away and never be seen again. Or who knows what the hell else. And all because you couldn't be a responsible pet owner and keep your own dog on a leash. People like that make me so angry.

[@GrandCorsair]

I'm sorry Mark but not every job is going to be cool with you leaving work for a dog. I'm not sure what relationship with your boss was but not every boss is going to be that understanding. What if she had a deadline or if it effected her co workers. He was right there and could have just taken it home. That dog was dirty probably thirty and hungry maybe even tired. Like all he had to do was deliver it safely at home and be mildly inconvenienced vs someone having to convince their job that they needed to leave work to pick up a lost dog probably costing them hours off their paycheck and hurt credibility.

[@RSN2277]

I disagree with you here. If it's his car, then he gets to decide on this. If it's no big deal, then OP's sister can pay for having his car cleaned. If he doesnt want a dog in his car, then OP could have also said book an uber ride from their location to the house and when OP's sister came back, both of them could have driven over to where the car was over there. My point is OP has a hard rule on this and doesn't want to budge on this, sister could have tried alternative suggestions here instead of using OP's car.

[@GrandCorsair]

@@RSN2277 Then we can agree to disagree because honestly a person's job is more important than a car in my opinion. If the sister wasn't at work I would agree with you. The last thing I would want to add the stress of arguing with my sibling and worrying about my dog.

[@RSN2277]

@@GrandCorsair I am not saying that she had to leave her work to get her dog. I am saying that OP would have waited no matter how long it takes for her to be there. However, I looked at the comments and would say ESH. OP is TA here because OP said there was no leash available, so then I would be saying OP took a big Risk by the dog not running away then. However, sister would have been TA here because OP took the dog to her place, ehatbwould have stopped the dog from running away again. So majorly conflicted over here.

[@GrandCorsair]

@@RSN2277 I still feel like it's safer for it to be at home. He might have been dehydrated and god knows what he was eating. I don't know how he got out but if I was the owner I would have still felt better for it to be at the house than where he found it and it could run off again. Without a leash I don't know if the Uber driver would be cool with that. I don't know maybe I am thinking about this from a pet owner and how stressed the hell out I'd feel in her shoes.

[@Norinia]

Story 2 NTA, OP stayed with the dog and was willing to wait. That’s more generous than most lost pets get. We think it couldn’t have hurt, but who knows what the dog could have done, he could have chewed the seats, scratched them while excited, there was a little more at risk than fur and dirt, and while pet owners don’t generally mind, it sounds like OP isn’t a pet owner, so of course they are more concerned about how their nicer newer car would handle a super happy dog. I’m 70-80% sure there had to be someone else the sister could have called, but she decided to be pissy instead of grateful because OP wouldn’t let the dog in the car.

[@HighPhoenix1754]

Story 2, so glad Mark saw the light. NTA. Not his dog. Not really his responsibility. He found their lost dog and was more than willing to wait for them to come at their convenience. Seems reasonable to me.

[@ichigokurosaki-ij6bk]

2nd story.... Not the A. Rules dont work unless you follow them. You decide what is tolerable for you and your property.

[@noraallies598]

The lost dog story. A anxious pup can be a chewy pup. It wouldn't take long for a dog to chew through car seats to the point they need to get reupholstered.

[@GabrielleHayes1921]

"keep still" worst thing someone can say when someones dog is coming for you. This neighbor of my parents has a very aggressive dog that was attacking me and I should've just kicked it across the road, and I was turning in circles trying to keep my feet up so my boots could protect me against the bites (a few weeks before it had bit me and gone through the skin, freaking chihuahuas man, btw both times I was walking down the street and it came running out of their house to attack me for that, first time I was trying to find my missing license a little ways away from their house close to the post office, second I had a 4-H meeting and was in front of their house) and she was mad I wouldn't stay still as if then her dog would magically stay still. I told my mom about it and she said if it had bit me and the owner done nothing (we know the lady well) she would've sued and shot the dog herself, another parent at the meeting asked why I didn't just kick the dog and the thought didn't really occur to me when I love dogs so much and the owner was standing there as well, I felt if I had I would've been in trouble, which is stupid because I was being attacked. If it ever comes after one of my kids though you best believe it won't be coming home alive, I may be bad at defending myself, but my children are a whole new story and I've found since having my daughter that I take less shit than I use to

[@Park-Kim_VMin]

Story 4. NTA what if she got dropped would her parents feel the same way, it's clear who the favorite child is. What is wrong with these Reddit people? OP says she is the only one that was diagnosed with depression in her family not her sister.

[@bbjjbb61]

They are all projecting. It's usually mental health, you must speak to everyone in soft tones and understand those who screw you over, get counseling, this is above Reddits pay grade, and on and on. Its humorous actually. They all assume the college age girl is partying because she MUST have a mental health issue 🙄 Oh! I also forgot they usually come down hard on covid rule breakers. Poor OP.

[@Park-Kim_VMin]

@@bbjjbb61 Right what if she just likes partying? The one diagnosed with depression I see she went to school. They're both in the same college, Make it make sense

[@violette2139]

Even if she has depression and can't handle attending class, all she had to do was open Zoom on her phone, turn off her camera, mute herself and put her phone on silent. She doesn't even have to leave her bed or even pay attention to anything and they would mark her as present.

[@MartaTarasiuk]

I think that this is one of those cases when Reddit people are projecting their own issues.

[@Chiller-pc1dv]

@@bbjjbb61 Agreed, it pisses me off to no end, considering I'm a mentally ill person, who was abused by other mentally ill people. I will NEVER forgive them, speak to them, or sympathize with them....they traumatized me, fuck them, they're shitty people. Them being mentally ill and having gone through abuse themselves...doesn't suddenly make their actions ok...it doesn't mean they have a right to be shitty, and it doesn't give them a free pass from taking responsibility for their actions.

[@izzlebizzle9581]

Hearing Mark defend his pupper is my favourite thing today

[@hannahchristine5240]

Story 2: NTA imo. I love my animals. They are my entire world and I would be dead without them. I have a small farm and struggled to find and buy land just to make them all happy. That said, they have absolutely destroyed my cars. Hair everywhere no matter how much I vacuum, scratches in the leather, stains despite putting down tarps and blankets when animals are injured and rushed to the vet, buttons on the console jammed. If you care about your car and it’s not your dog, I don’t blame the guy for not wanting his car damaged. It absolutely sucks that they had to leave work, but they didn’t have to. OP was willing to stay with the dog as long as needed and, if it didn’t look physically distressed or have any visible injury, there’s no rush to get it to the vet or home besides emotions.

[@zapacunotres59]

Story 2: NTA. He stayed with the dog and said he'd wait however long. Inconvenience? Not really.

[@GreenSkye42]

I had something similar happen with my dog. My dog being on a lead and this couple had their dog off of it. It ran up to my dog and they started fighting. The couple couldn't help me separate them as they were about 8 houses down from where I was. No dogs were injured. Dogs who can't stay with their owners shouldn't be off of the lead

[@incineroar9933]

Dogs shouldn't be off their leashes when outside of their owners' property unless they're in a fenced in dog park. My 35lbs pit mix nearly got destroyed by this 150lbs ovcharka, and we've been attacked by many friendly off-leash dogs. My pit has had to defend my 8lbs yorkie several times from other large dogs who could have killed him. He's literally jumped over the yorkie to protect him from a german shepherd who came out of nowhere and tried to snap him up.

[@mbyerly9680]

If you can get legal pepper spray, carry it with you. It will stop a dog and give you enough time to get away.

[@shebakoby]

Man: breaks up with GF, having accused GF of having cheated. now-Ex GF: Fine, now you're not coming on a surprise trip to Vegas I had planned. ex BF: Surprised Pikachu Face

[@H.P._Lovecrafts_Beloved_Cat]

Story 2: I’m gonna go with NTA. Honestly, OP set a clear boundary and it’s his sister’s job to respect that. OP even offered a very decent compromise, to stay with the dog no matter how long it took. Sis didn’t need to leave work early, that’s not a position OP put her in, that’s a decision she made after OP gave the compromise. That’s the problem I have, she literally did not need to do what she did.

[@sirresigmenduken5033]

Man I didn’t expect the second story to be so divisive. From my experience, dogs are absolute hair bombs. My girlfriend picked up a lost retriever 2 years ago, and she still has hair in her car from that. We spent over an hour trying to clean it with very little success. It’s not as easy to clean as some people believe.

[@mbyerly9680]

Use a static clean spray then vaccuum. Sticky rolls work, too.

[@sirresigmenduken5033]

@@mbyerly9680 The problem wasn’t really the method, but just the overwhelming amount of hair. It was all over the back seat, the floor, in every single nook and cranny. You’d get one hair, and two more would take its place. That’s why we gave up lol

[@mbyerly9680]

@@sirresigmenduken5033 I had a golden who traveled six hours back and forth with me in my car to my mom's house several times a month, and I dealt with the fur problems. Sure, there was some I didn't get, but my car stayed fairly clean.

[@sirresigmenduken5033]

@@mbyerly9680 cool

[@ThunderSkull214]

Story 2 NTA, it seems reddit conveniently "forgot" to read the part that OP said they'd be willing to wait as long as needed so there was no need to miss work/leave early.

[@sephaya1563]

Story 4. Sister doesn't need to be in the class, just log in and then could do whatever. She had the energy to get out of bed and get rdy for a party but not to turn on the pc and log in a few days at least? OP has depression and still logs in. Op got told she would be kicked out of the house if she got dropped. Now everything is suddenly fine? just because of a pandemic? Seems BS to me. Double standards and laziness. I was heavenly depresses and close to medication but still went to school most of the days even while being bullied there. I never missed 2 weeks in a row espacially if I didn't even need to do anything other than log into zoom or whatever.

[@riceracm]

7:05 *I’M SO GLAD YOU SAID NTA MARK!* I can’t believe everyone is saying YTA, I am 100% on the side of you and OP! 😬🥳

[@locusxe1411]

I can

[@ps.a.5171]

Yeah I really hate having my car dirty. I'd do the same.

[@littleoak5]

Because one dog in her car for one car ride is not going to permanently damage her vehicle. This woman is acting like having a dog in the car for less than 10 minutes is going to irreparably damage her vehicle and that's just not the case. She's just lazy and doesn't want to vacuum out the hair

[@siggie8727]

She missed 2 weeks of school but can go party !!! Op is not a ahole

[@jessicawaldeback]

That dog and car story: OP is NTA. I don’t care about keeping a car clean, but my hang up is all about security. Everyone who travels in a car needs to be buckled up, right. Due to security in case of a crash. Imagine the injuries a flying body would do during a crash. The way I see it animals need the same. Either a crate in the boot, or being buckled to the safety belt. Both due to the security of the animal, and the security of others. If people doesn’t care about that, then animals have no business travelling in cars.

[@Digitalfairy]

Now that makes more sense.

[@L0wSkiller]

Story 2 I whole heatedly agree with Mark on this one. Dog hair has a nice way of never leaving no matter how much one tries to clean it. OP said the sister was there within 15 minutes, if an employer can't give me the 35-40 minutes to save a family member from the side of the road that is not an employer I want to be working for. It wasn't even as if OP said I'm not taking the dog in my car, you need to come now, they said they would wait however long it took. So even if the sister had to wait until after work to get the pupper it's not like anything is inherently wrong there, he was being watched. Another thing about the car are doggo nails. They have a real great way of scarring plastic bits on the inside of a car, and that's not something one can easily just "clean" not to mention we didn't know if the seats were leather or not. If I took pride in my vehicle, you bet your ass I'd do everything I could to keep the interior in as good of condition as possible (within reason, I'd let kids and animals in if there was a natural disaster or something time sensitive and bad happening). I just feel like his sister doesn't respect his point of view, probably because she doesn't have a nice car she is trying to keep pristine? Or if she does, she just doesn't care as much as OP does. And that's a completely valid viewpoint to have.

[@brachiosaurus6350]

Story 1 I’d be willing to bet he’s cheating projection is one hell of a drug

[@saradejesus8313]

I agree with you, Mark! I vote NTA for the dog story. OP found the dog, doesn’t want dogs in his car. He’s allowed! He called his sister, and she’s asking him to bring the dog to her, in his car, and it sounds like she wasn’t even grateful that her dog was found! No good deed goes unpunished…

[@margielou6914]

Op in the school story HAS diagnosed depression and still got the “stay in school or you have to leave” from his parents. Yet, the sister has a non diagnosed issue and gets dropped from classes. Of course op is upset by the very different parental reaction. Maybe the mom shouldn’t have tried to force op to give up sympathy to sis and just got her help…

[@TheKpichon]

As someone with dogs he's not the asshole. It's nearly impossible to get dog hair out without special tools

[@wildfyah]

2nd story I'd also go with NAH If OP is from the US I get the YTA responses considering how cut throat and obnoxious work-life is over there but I also know how precious people are with new stuff, especially cars, furniture, etc. If sis offered to get his car cleaned afterwards then it would have been an ok trade off but OP did offer to stay with the dog. Glad she got her dog back either way and hope they could move past that

[@babybookworm003]

Slight op is the ahole op could have asked if there was anyone else they could have called to get the dog

[@kattleavitt290]

@Just a Piranha Plant with Internet Access you been posting this so much I’m not sure you’re aware that 1) you can smell things in the trunk, and 2) good way to get in trouble for animal cruelty is throwing the dog in there

[@myhubbyislouisvuitton4218]

I have a no dog in my car rule. The only exception was when my friends dog was ill. I drove the Missy to the vet. That dog could have fleas or ticks. No freaking way!

[@absolutelyridiculous6743]

Just because the sister isn't being responsible doesn't mean she's depressed. There are quite a bit of simply lazy people out there who make poor choices.

[@susanminer2088]

Sorry, your brother found your dog. He was out a few days and dirty. Be thankful he got your dog back. You were inconvenienced, and your sister should have shown some gratitude. NTA

[@jondano8249]

My faith is totally restored in you, Mark.. dog story.. I was almost ready to skip it with all the YTA's, but we have no idea the condition of this dog, what kind of shedder he is, the degree of damage possible at all, and all these people are busting OP out badly.. NTA.. no time, no day, no way!

[@mbyerly9680]

Goldens shed, a lot. They are, however, water dogs which means dirt and other things don't stick to them. My golden puppy would go out and play in a mud puddle, come in muddy, plop down for a quick nap, and be totally clean when she woke up. They don't shed odor, though.

[@TheIronwil]

Story 4: NTA. I get what people are saying about mental health issues, but where do we draw the line of personal accountability? Someone going out and partying, drinking too much and using substances, can be a sign of mental health problems... or it could be the sign of someone that chooses partying over their duties. Again, where do we finally hold someone accountable for their failures, if nearly anything they do is perceived as a mental health problem?

[@MaRi-dz4fu]

Story 2: I’m completely with Mark on this one, NTA. I have a dog, and if I were in that situation (hopefully never) I’d be nothing but grateful to my brother for finding my boy and rush there instead of complaining. Why make drama when there’s actually a reason for JOY, cmon.

[@t1995roger10]

For real! I find it bizarre that the sister and those commenters had that sense of entitlement that someone found the dog and would bring it to you. Especially since it's a new car, I love dogs just as much as the next guy but dog fur and mud is something that I don't want to deal with unless the sister is willing to pay to get the interior cleaned professionally

[@angelflyfreesky4984]

Right!? Plus, besides the smell, dirt and hair seeping deep into the car seats, there's no telling what contaminants and bugs this dog has gotten on it. Why on earth was the owner acting like she doesn't want the dog back? Did the dog really "accidentally" get lost?

[@yourneighborhooddeadpool488]

The commenters kept on saying that OP can just clean the car with soap and water. UMMM, not everyone has leather seats and you can’t just clean it with just soap and water. FFS just let work know what’s happening and go pick up your dog.

[@shadowscall7758]

@@yourneighborhooddeadpool488 Not all jobs is that an option. For example, I worked at a human services agency for a couple years, I was literally the only one watching several people that we supported who could not be left alone for even 10 minutes. Since I was the only one there, there was no option for me to leave, even for emergencies without severely jeopardizing my job. Getting someone else out there to cover for me took at LEAST an hour, if I could even find someone.

[@NeoLotex]

Story 2: What a shitty guy, making her get off her ass to get back a beloved family member. How dare he! Seriously, for me it's a NTA case as he waited for someone to come and didn't just leave the dog there. Cleaning a car is not necessarily something easy to do and the "something that you could've easily fixed" people are probably the ones where you can't sit in the car with them without shoveling old coffee cups and such into the backseat.

[@janetac1738]

I am so glad you said NTA at the dog story! Because I feel the same way. every word you said to describe and explain your NTA is exactly how I feel

[@canadalovesanime3137]

story 1: He ended it. He is looking for an out, and doesn't want to be the "bad guy". OP owes this jerk nothing. OP let the little boy go back to his mummy. OP doesn't owe him any explanation, as an adult OP doesn't need HIS permission to do what she wants. He can pay for himself like an adult. NTA story 2: No good deed goes unpunished. The sister was SOOOO worried about her precious dog but it was missing for a while, but didn't want to go get it. OP was good enough to stop when they saw the dog, and then stay with it until someone could come get it. I would have taken a picture and sent it to the sister while letting her know I had an appointment or something. NTA story 3: OP needs to separate for a while. Then when he starts calling and telling her she needs to come home, OP can say; "Oh, I'm sorry but you are over reacting to me just needing some time to rethink somethings". When he starts flipping out, OP can continue with the "your over reacting". This boy doesn't respect OP, and he certainly doesn't respect women. Not a good role model for young children. OP better hope this new baby is also a boy, because that "good father" will disappear when he is faced with a daughter. NTA story 4: This sounds like the mum has a GC and OP is just supposed to suck it up, and "help your poor sister", after the mean school kicked her out fro no reason. If mum was really worried about sister being depressed, she would take her to a doctor. Mum knows the real reason she couldn't get up is because she was up partying all the time. If OP can just get out for dropping school, so can the sister. Tell the sister to go to a doctor. The parents only seem to care about the sister, since OP was threatened to be thrown out(probably after the depression was found), but now mummy is demanding compassion for sister without even taking her to a doctor. NTA

[@maemae527]

7:31 we don’t know what job they have tho- the sister could work in the medical field and not have a forgiving manager, or their managers could have said no.

[@mlapointej]

But the person said they were willing to wait however long even until their sister was done work. Everyone could have just waited for the convenient time

[@Tues48]

@@mlapointej we don't know how long sister would be at work for. If she had an 8 hr shift and op found the dog 3 hours into the shift, that's still 5 hrs of waiting.

[@WatsonAndDaughter]

Idk, if this guy is this high maintanance it's likely he wouldn't actually have. And what if he lost hold of it and it got lost again, or hit by a car? It would be risky not to go ASAP, and could have definitely hurt their job. I think it's more of an ESH, but OP is definitely a dick. I worked for a rental car company for a long while; we got hair out with nothing but a shop vac and a carpet stone. Annoying? Yes. Worth this level of shitty pettiness? No.

[@mlapointej]

@@Tues48 yes and he offered to wait. He was already doing a huge favour a bigger favour in fact inconveniencing him more than just taking the dog home. If he was willing to just wait with the dog because he didn't want an animal in his car that is perfectly acceptable nobody has any right to demand that somebody do a favour for them. He was already offering to help her, just not the way she preferred. It was still a favour a really nice one at that.

[@Tues48]

@@mlapointej i just don't understand why waiting potential hours just to keep a car clean. Upholstery is easier to clean these days.

[@karimygirl5826]

Story 2 the fact that he even told his sister that he found her dog was enough considering he gave a reasonable alternative and everybody's pissed about it.

[@kevinskidmore168]

Some people are just lazy and while I love mental health being treated the way it should and being acknowledged it also pushes into situations where it isn’t deserved.

[@FoxyMomma4ever]

Exactly!!

[@nikkaztia2113]

Story two - I love my dog and willing to deal with Dog Damage. Goldens (I had one who died. I still miss him) are big dogs. Excitable Dogs. Energetic Dogs. They can do non repairable damage to a car's interior. I am talking deep scratches to the head board. Toe nail punchers to the seats. He was willing to wait for them to pick up their dog. He is NTA. They should have been thrilled that their dog was found.

[@corvus4976]

Story 4 NTA I honestly don’t understand the: OMG, she is depressed! For me there are no clear signs. I am aware that many mental health issues are hard to notice sometimes, but lazy people still exist. She sleept for two weeks, skipped classes and went on parties every week since the pandemic started. This sounds like being an asshole, not depressed. I struggle with mental health issues myself. It’s fucking awfull. Participating in anything can be really difficult. You know what do I do regarding school? I lie down, because I have no strenght to do anything at this hour. Then I open an app, join the lesson, turn off sound and camera. No one cares. I was present, only this matters. There, done.

[@MN-zh2vd]

Story 1: YTA for being such an easy doormat. Lord. Is being single really so horrible that you're so happy to tolerate abuse like that?

[@shecoda4402]

Mark read the last part of this. Second story OP NTA OP sat with the dog to see that the dog got back to his sister. I think sis should be grateful he found and sat with the dog for however long it took. It is after all her dog. If one of my dogs went missing and somebody found it I would do anything to get there to get the dog. The alternative - no dog is not an option. Sis should thank OP and take him out to dinner for spotting and staying with the dog. Mark, big dogs see little dogs as prey. A little dog is a rabbit or a squirrel or some other small prey (food). My 8 pound chihuahua was picked up and shaken like a rag doll by a 90 pound Belgian Malinois (it was a military trained police dog). My dog was on a retractable leash about 12 feet out. This dog bounded across the road so fast neither my dog nor myself saw it coming. We were looking in the other direction because the people in that direction have a Great Dane that sometimes run around their front yard. I was frozen. Normally I would have waded in and tried to make the big dog drop my dog as I have great health insurance and my dog could potentially cost thousands of dollars at the vet to put back together. I didn't move because I knew the big dog was trained to attack people. My dog's harness latch snapped, due to the force of the shaking. I had noticed earlier that one tooth of the latch was bending but decided to risk it for this walk and get a new one later in the day. That decision probably saved his life. Luckily the big dog had been desensitized to little dogs and was just policing the neighborhood so when my dog fell out of its mouth and scuttled home it decided it had done its job and didn't pursue my dog and kill him. That was terror, but even more terror happened. I had a second dog, a tiny long-haired chihuahua puppy that I was leash training it was maybe 2 pounds at the time. This big dog turned its attention to my puppy and started batting the puppy around like a cat bats a mouse. As I was dealing with this puppy and the big dog I was very slightly relieved to see my other dog was almost home. I picked up the puppy by the leash as he was in a harness. It was terrifying. I had both dogs checked out at the vets immediately and other than a light bite on the bigger of the two dog's neck and some antibiotics the dog was fine. I learned two things (this was in California) 1. Even though retractable leashes are allowed to be sold here, they are against the law. This isn't a criminal offense but rather setting blame if anything happens as a result. 2. Legal leash limit here is 6 feet, a typical nylon dog leash is 6 feet. More than 6ft. and the owner of the dog on the long leash is considered by the law out of control of their dog. 3. Since my dogs were out further than 6 feet, I was 50% responsible for what happened. Because the other dog was not on a leash the owner was more responsible and a judge, had I needed to go to court to recoup thousands of dollars in vet bills, might have split it 60% or maybe even 70% of vet bills to the other dog's owner but could also easily have just found me 50% to blame and 50% responsible for the vet bills. 4. As far out as that dog on a retractable leash is in front of you, that is how far it can run out in the road when walking down a sidewalk. Needless to say, I got rid of the retractable leashes and only use the 6ft legal leash. I will say I do have more control over my dogs. Oh, and no matter how nice a dog looks or the owner says its a nice dog, it's used to small dogs, or it plays with small dogs all the time, I NEVER let a big dog approach my little dogs. I don't care how nice the owner says the big dog is, I just won't take that chance. As I was told by an Animal Control officer whom you call in the States to report dog attacks, loose dogs, etc., that sometimes, without warning, a dog that may be friendly to all the other little dogs, can suddenly decide it just doesn't like a certain small dog (or even a certain big dog) and the fight is on to the detriment of the little dog. Also big dogs may be friendly to little dogs until one day that little dog squeals like a squeak toy and suddenly the big dog's prey drive is activated and they can attack a companion dog they have been with for months and even years. This is because the squeal of the little dog activates the more primitive area of the big dog's brain and instinct just takes over, and instinct is that little animals mean food.

[@atinyevil1383]

Agreed. When I hear pet stories, I always think “how would this be if it were a child?” Would you be upset if someone found your missing child and couldn’t drive them home? No, you’d be more concerned with going and getting your missing child.

[@willj24]

Mark, I totally agree with you on story number two. If I were that brother, and my sister decided to throw a cow because I found her dog but wasn’t willing to put it in my car, I would just resolve that the next time she loses a dog if I see it somewhere I’m just gonna ignore it. He did her a huge favor and she’s entitled to insist that he do something more for her when he already did something out of his way for her.

[@epicXtrollface]

"In the end I had to tell her to piss off, she was doing my head in." Mark, your Brit is showing lolol

[@brantregare]

story 2: I do not get the YTA verdict here. Dogs from the street can have a pungent and pervasive smell, (lets be clear they can STINK, make your want vomit kind of stink.) Not wanting to mess up your car is perfectly normal. The alternative offered is more that reasonable, "I am willing to wait here until you pick up you pet, no matter how long that takes." Assuming that you would be willing to soil your car, with the concomitant cleaning and deodorification at your own expense is just wrong.

[@francessmith5073]

My grandmother was once asked if she had dogs by a motor mechanic. She had two springer spaniels at the time. She asked why and the mechanic told her car's engine was covered in dog hair. I understand people who don't want dogs in their car.

[@dm9078]

Why is she with this guy NTA! YTA 100%. Some people have jobs that they have a hard time getting off work.

[@Russman67]

Story 2: This one's a mixed bag. On the one hand OP did find the dog and wait for them to get there so on that note OP's awesome! And while I get the "no dog rule in the new car, especially a stinky dog has been living on the street for x amount of days, there could have been an arrangement put together. Maybe have the owners pay to get your car detailed? This didn't sound like a missing junkyard dog that's just going to destroy your car inside of a 5-minute drive. Very likely this dog was as tired as hell and just happy to see a friendly face. Getting it to lay down while you drove at home wasn't going to be that hard. Very soft YTA. Story 3: While Mark read what the guy did I screamed "Noooooo!" In the car. Dude need to be checked before he gets sued. NTA

[@nancyjay790]

I'm guessing lots of these YTA come from people who are dog types, they either have a dog, have had a dog, or want to have a dog. For them, cleaning up dog hair etc isn't a problem, but they value a dog over a car.

[@ohnooffwego]

It takes 30 goddamn seconds to vacuum the back seat of a car. A moment of cleaning versus making your sibling leave their job and potentially suffer real consequences. OP is a total ass.

[@songohan3321]

@@nancyjay790 Glad you pointed this out. Plus vehicles have to be prepared for dogs riding. Also, many dogs don't stay in one spot. A dog that has been on the streets for x amount of days will smell and be extremely dirty. Plus car detailing is expensive, especially a new car. You talking about $100+. I guarantee you that the sister would not pay for that.

[@person9433]

@@ohnooffwego He didn't make his sister leave work. He said he would wait HOWEVER long it took. He was willing to wait. She chose to leave work. She could of said "I will pick him up after work, think you can get (X item) for dogs well being" if she was concerned for her dogs health. If he was telling her she needed to get him now then he would be the asshole BUT he didn't. He was willing to wait. He even was waiting after she hung up on him.

[@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax]

He could have just put a blanket on the seat or buy a covering from a shop while the other guy could wait 5 minutes til he came back if he didn't want to get his car dirty? I wouldn't like putting a filthy dog in my car but I'd find a way to cover the seats to put the dog in!

[@Gymtoshi]

Story 2, NTA, it was never stated if this person had OCD, had a serious fear of germs, had any allergies or anything else. Being willing to wait I agree is more than reasonable. It sounds like OP had clear set boundaries on it

[@Latino-Gamer]

Story 2: I agree with you, Mark, NTA. The brother found the dog and he even said he was willing to wait, so the sister didn't need to rush from work. She seems ungrateful that he even found her lost dog!

[@shadowscall7758]

Would he have been willing to wait HOURS though? She could have had 7+ hours left on her shift and be unable to leave even during lunch or breaks without severe consequences to her job. I can 99.9% guarantee you that OP would not have been OK waiting 7+ hours for her to finish her shift.

[@eeveewonder6277]

Story 2: Op is not the ah. It's HIS car and he has the right to refuse letting the dog in. Also he clearly stated he'll wait for his sister for as long as he needed to. And like wtf is he supposed to do if he drove the dog home? Both his sister and her husband are at work, meaning the dog will be left at the house alone with no food or water (if the food and water bowls/the food itself are kept in the house) , and I'm going to hazard a guess and say he most likely doesn't have a key to her home. So imo the sister is kinda a b arch for expecting her brother to do a favour for her.

[@marshawargo7238]

I Think if mom knows sister has "problems" dad does too. But OP said dad is "on the fence" what side to b on. So it appears sister's acting like a "college party girl" ...

[@michamocha]

These days, people are quick to try to diagnose people over the internet over one incident that they see or hear with little to no knowledge. If they're not professionals, you shouldn't be going around yelling depression over any abnormal behavior.

[@SweetSunnyDream1]

The dog-story: hell yeah, id go running to get my dog.

[@VeireDame]

Same, but I'd still be fucking livid that my brother was cold and materialistic enough to value some fancy ass possession over this living creature who he knows I love and care for. The dog didn't even have a collar for OP to hold onto, how was he even effectively containing the dog while he waited? At that point, since he had access to a way to keep the dog safely contained, that's just negligent. I'd be hella cold to my brother after that, not because I'd stay angry at him, but because the whole situation would've caused me to lose a lot of trust for him.

[@RSN2277]

@@VeireDame I highly disagree with you. If OP said," Okay, I'll take him, but you have to pay for the clean up of the dog hair and however long it takes to get it back to normal." Then sister says "No. Im not paying for that." People would still say YTA for doing that because it's his car, he should clean it up himself. Nope. I don't blame OP and he is NTA at all here. It's their car, so if they have a policy of "No dogs allowed", that should he good enough here. If the dog was having their life being endangered, I'm sure OP would have let the dog inside because that would have been life or death.

[@itsneverduck.8691]

For story 3: why was the nanny at the bar with both of the parents? Who was taking care of their other kid?? Kids aren’t allowed in bars where I am, so just off of that I’m going to assume the kid wasn’t there with them, but I don’t know.

[@ellellim]

today everyone is a doctor and points straight up to mental health issues when someone behaves differently than the norm. Sometimes it is just laziness. Sometimes it is just irresponsibility. Sometimes they are just brats.

[@SilverMaychan]

Maybe she needs to take getofyourassadone.

[@thedestroyasystem]

Yeah, it's really frustrating when people without a degree or any experience in the field try to "diagnose" complete strangers. What's the worst is that it usually happens when someone is exhibiting negative traits and people use their made up diagnoses as an excuse. "Oh, I think she has xyz, she can't control it!" Take Trisha Paytas as an example. Does she have mental health issues? Maybe. Is it entirely possible she's just an asshole who will hurt whomever she needs for clout? Absolutely. Being a bad person, or having negative traits, does not mean you are mentally ill or neurodivergent and the association between the two is something we need to stop. And even if the person is mentally ill, that is no excuse to be an asshole.

[@TheIronwil]

Dirty Dog: YTA. No doubt at all. Making the sister pay for getting her car cleaned (if the dog was that dirty) would have been understandable. Maybe. Depends on the level of grime. But to make her sister leave work to pick the dog up smacks of neurosis. There's no way her car is that precious.

[@Willow_and_Sage]

Story 2: NTA, have you ever had a mischievous dog? I've had a dog chew through my seat belts. So no, not the asshole.

[@troubleinthevalley5884]

I'm curious how women end up marrying these guys and then talk about this huge thing that this man does that really bothers them and is highly inappropriate. And most of the time, they knew this about this person before they married him. Like why would you think that's going to change now that you're married? Or were you just planning on overlooking it for the rest of your life?

[@PercyJacksonRules17]

Story 4: I’m gonna say NTA. The schools policy stated that if any student missed 2 weeks of class they’d be dropped. I understand that she may be struggling with mental health but she knew the rule. This would be a good time for the sister to take a break, hopefully they can get her some help and maybe she can enroll in school later.

[@DaniS398]

Dog story. NTA. Soap and water does not clean a dog dirty car. That's a couple hundred to get all the hair and mud out. (I have dogs). That dog is not his responsibility and he offered to stay with the dog until they got off work. One of my dogs went missing once and I left work at lunch to look for him and my job understood. I did find him. If a strange had found the dog, would she expect that person to drive the dog to her house as well?