r/murderedbywords Top Posts of All Time [2]

[@scratch4982]

everyone out here talking about how savage Wendy’s is are we all gonna ignore Moon Pie?

[@NoNoDontTouchMeThere]

Nah I got you back on that

[@theweakestbrazilianmale3398]

The Moon Pie Twitter is just a less edgy Wendy´s

[@FrancisR420]

I've been ignoring MoonPie my whole life, I'm not stopping now.

[@abramo7700]

Wendy’s is just an asshole, lol.

[@emmanueladesiyan2236]

Y'all sleeping on Magikarp

[@nerkdurgen5574]

"Son won't have childreeennn-eh" Everybody gangsta til sorrow bust out the nasally Karen voice.

[@nerkdurgen5574]

@@DigitalDaydreams Is that what the community calls it? I had to think for like five minutes on what to describe that voice as.

[@nerkdurgen5574]

@ and I oopsie

[@Soapcookies]

@ are you sure she is?

[@rainbowslushy223]

One of my favourite characters/ voices

[@coriolis07]

Nerk Durgen once I had a dentist named Karen. She was pretty neat. Talked to me about my favorite book (Uzumaki). Wasn’t there for too long tho so maybe I have no right to judge. Didn’t rub me the wrong way though.

[@hisholinesstheanimepope6319]

To the guy who disrespected my main man Magikarp. At least Magikarp can become something great and powerful.

[@thegreatkingdedede7391]

@Mrs. Lop3z That's...why I'm here.

[@noakinn]

Mrs. Lop3z Do not link subreddits out of reddit. You look a like a moronic fuck lemur.

[@SakuraAvalon]

That Magikarp knows Scald.

[@danielbueno8474]

@Mrs. Lop3z sorry to do this, but... r/foundthemobileuser

[@madafaka2666]

_But Magikarp is already something great and powerful_

[@banshusband8095]

as a person with athsma, i can confirm i need bicycle helmets and fish bowls

[@zoophiliaphobic]

P

[@l.yoked.l1784]

As another person with asthma, I can confirm this.

[@bayli1230]

Me to man...me to...

[@zoophiliaphobic]

Gotta update the letter p to furfag

[@lukeharnish3358]

ii Ax ii As a person with both asthma and depression I can confirm all of this it’s very true but I wonder what they’re going to say about the ADHD

[@derpythedaedra4194]

>stay at home mother >criticizes working person for not having money >*in what fantasy land does she live in*

[@daroaminggnome]

@@deusexrockina Tbf the single working mom is probably also a bitch(considering she shows up uninvited to someones house and starts trying to guilt trip them with waterworks to the point that the man of the house feels like he has to call the cops on his own sister-in-law). The suggestion that she find a circle of friends with interests/lifestyles/income more closely aligned with her own is in the best interests of both parties, IMO. Just 'cause you're family doesn't mean you're obligated to be friends with each other.

[@misterree09]

@@daroaminggnome Do you happen to be Sad Sister's other sister not named "Wendy"? Hence why your comment suggests you approve deliberately excluding her just because she's different. The irony of supposedly forgiving and understanding Christians being the opposite of what is taught in church is lost on you.

[@ninetailsgaming2919]

Derpy the Daedra *wait* *wait* *w a i t* 🙏 👋 *B O I* this ain’t the 1960’s

[@ninetailsgaming2919]

30’s*

[@spindash64]

Suburbia. I grew up there, it’s a prison surrounded by imported grass.

[@1995to2013]

The post of Sad Sister is really disheartening, I really hope that poster's sister does find people who actually appreciate her and show her kindness! Can't imagine how difficult it is to be a single mom divorcee :( So glad Amy didn't indulge in Sad Sister's bs lmao

[@qjtvaddict]

Angie ᄑᄉᄑ s considering what happens to children of single moms there is a reason people get that hateful towards those women.

[@idolmike6779]

@@qjtvaddict I consider myself pretty normal...

[@may292]

@@qjtvaddict what do you mean?

[@Samantha-xp8cn]

@@qjtvaddict What exactly happens? Care to elaborate?

[@irlwillsolace]

@Melon Sauce same

[@danaburr3296]

Joke's on Katie Hopkins, I'm wearing running shoes and I went outside today and I'm still depressed

[@strawberryflavouredcloroxb1565]

i need a bathtub and a toaster

[@duckduckinator3185]

Strawberry Flavoured Clorox Bleach I need a bucket of choclate

[@jvgreendarmok]

*Hopkins

[@alexwright5419]

Dana Bruh Katie Hopkins not Katie Holmes

[@holdmybleach2651]

You forgot to do the running part.

[@ChristAliveForevermore]

Neil DeGrasse Tyson is basically the personification of r/iamverysmart

[@misterwuss5456]

And the worse part is that I can never tell if he's serious! So I can't even tell if it's a r/whoosh! Help!

[@selensewar]

@@misterwuss5456 just assume everyone is lying. The wonders of the internet!

[@misterwuss5456]

@@selensewar then I will presume you're lying too and oh god I have no idea what to do anymore....

[@random4115]

The worse thing... He actually is

[@VFG204]

Michael Asta Just like Elon Musk is the personification of r/quityourbullshit.

[@buffnatsuki7204]

As i diabetic, i do indeed use nail polish and fishing rods.

[@PRGME7]

Buff Natsuki I have autism and I need magnets and blankets

[@Cajek2]

I use nail polish and fishing rods and I only have a personality disorder

[@accountname4754]

I am not diabetic but nail polish is great and fishing rods are cool

[@marciitapper9411]

As a person with Ulcerative colitis, I do indeed need a book and a lightbulb

[@afif5496]

As a person with schizophrenia, i need a sock and a Bleach

[@sasaki8765]

I'm Anemic. I don't need iron supplements, I just need TO DRINK THE BLOOD OF THE LIV- actually that'd probably work just fine in correct portions. Huh.

[@xidropkillzx3246]

Sasaki hows that shit going? My dad is also anemic very severe at first :(

[@4everMayito]

@@xidropkillzx3246 I was anemic too as a child, I just had to eat a lot of liver and I was back to normal in a couple days.

[@TimidIzzy]

I'm anemic too... Just badly enough that I found out because I realized I had some symptoms similar to blood cancer. Every time i get blood tests for various things, the doctors always go "...you are REALLY low on iron and vitamin D..." Like yeah, I know. I take the supplements.

[@xidropkillzx3246]

Izzy the Pooh haha the same results every time

[@rafi4949]

This could only go well keep me posted

[@BBelugawhale]

I’m depressed I need memes and grand illusions

[@sl8103]

Now THATS a cure

[@totallynotsam910]

same

[@beesgold1487]

I’ve pet you

[@BBelugawhale]

thanks me always enjoy pets

[@NoNoDontTouchMeThere]

That works for me

[@FrenkTheJoy]

The sister of Sad Sister definitely deserves better friends. It's irritating that Sad Sister and company will just think of the excluded sister as overreacting and whiny and shit without realizing that she has every reason to be upset that they're excluding her and her alone for shitty reasons.

[@amicaniiya1576]

9:13 to quote Tumblr user *marzipanandminutae* (responding to user *satanpositive* posting "Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue"): "They are indeed purple, But one thing you've missed The concept of "purple" Didn't always exist. Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his "wine-dark sea." A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold. So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I'm hugely pedantic, But what else is new?"

[@VenomQuill]

@Devika A I'm pretty sure it's getting there! Haha

[@ktkennedy7421]

I quote this all the time 😂

[@cryosthesia77k69]

This, this right here, this is GREAT

[@Iblamethebarrels]

Nice citation as well!

[@whiskeytengofoxtrot9670]

Leafy leaf leafeon leaf leeeeef Edit: forgot to translate I said sick fuckin beats brooo

[@PanzerMan332]

Posting Wendy's tweets on r/murderedbywords is cheating.

[@milkyu_ix]

Panzer Man True dat

[@Flomkarsten]

r/murderedbywendy's

[@jakemckown7195]

I met the person who generally runs the wendy’s twitter account :))

[@ItsMazzdy]

Panzer Man ii

[@AidRe]

SCOTLANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[@ashleypaige2973]

I feel so bad for Wendy.

[@CleanMusicHD223]

Mr. Dad especially since wendys and Carl's Jr are divorcing

[@AaaaNinja]

Well I Googled and found the complete unedited Amy post about "Wendy" and they have some pretty good reasons for excluding her that kinda make the "burn" by the columnist a little less justified. Seriously how is it possible to still be a "good person" and make room for someone whose conversation mainly consists of complaining?

[@roundbirb447]

AaaaNinja Complain with them, duh

[@nevayuh5636]

AaaaNinja what’s some of the reasons why?

[@goawayplease6456]

One Like = 1 friend for wendy

[@andreabritton7415]

I love how that woman ostracises her sister for HAVING a job. Its like your calling her a worse person for actually working.

[@davidtodd3809]

r/NobodyAsked. Make it happen.

[@Yorelz]

[ Hush ] agree

[@kevinl8659]

Yes please

[@eraykaan]

good profile picture

[@sarahevamarie9286]

i second this

[@blissfu_lee8522]

Agreed.

[@brainrich1358]

You do the voices really well....a little too well sometimes.

[@luvgus.]

Ever see the movie Split

[@gregithysallee8421]

Ever wonder why he doesn't show his face? It's because it's all different people.

[@sal-cf4kc]

4:44

[@darcmatter7560]

He may be Seymour

[@derpmcgerp8062]

Asking a little too many questions... Walking a little too close to the sun... Super Mega Fans, keep this guy on notice. You know what to do. 👿

[@grey9916]

i used to be depressed and the fresh and running shoes didnt work. therapy sure did though

[@funnymeme1847]

dID u tRY tO jUSt ChEer uP???

[@familiayoutuber4769]

It'S bEcAuSe YoU lAzY mIlLeNiAlS nEvEr CoMmIt To AnYtHiNg!

[@dummy9060]

yOu’Re JuSt DoInG iT fOr AtTeNtIoN

[@thisstatementisfalsenothin5312]

I was “depressed” (I didn’t see a doctor or anything I was just always sad as hell) and I got better by accidentally fixing all the things making me sad I might just be lucky but I pretty much just did stupid shit for a while and now my life’s pretty nice I got some friends I stopped caring about the people that didn’t care about me that kinda thing

[@georgiakapetaniou761]

@@thisstatementisfalsenothin5312 Ah... please don't diagnose yourself it's actually kinda offensive. Depression is not just being sad all the time and saying that you have a serious mental illness without being diagnosed makes people who actually suffer from it upset. It's one reason (in my opinion) why depression is not viewed as a serious issue Aside from that it's nice that you're doing better!

[@yokowan]

"What do you do when you're half your girl's size? climb up her leg fall asleep on her thighs" As a short guy, I'd love to do this. If I had a girl. Or anyone.

[@Brynwyn123]

Timgor as a tiny lesbian chubby chaser I concur

[@InVinoVeratas]

I mean if you’re open to it, my man thighs are available.

[@AngelofEresos]

Sometimes I wish I was a lady so I could offer all of their feminine blessings.

[@Jack-nb4tr]

Timgor you have me bb

[@CaptainDoomsday]

Ey hang in there bro everyone's socially terrified and if you watch this channel you know why but you can find someone just by being even moderately decent a person. The bar to stand out is super low; you can do it.

[@NorwayTracking]

I have insomnia, I’m going to need a paintbrush and a newspaper.

[@lukeharnish3358]

Won’t that keep you awake?

[@Archviste_]

Me too I need a plastic bag and some sleeping pills

[@Archviste_]

@Garrett Engell that works too

[@sirprize275]

You need a My Pillow! 2 for $160!

[@dannychefalo432]

I paint stuff when I can't sleep cause it's calming and helps reduce the frustration/anxiety I get from not being able to sleep

[@tavvy4426]

8:46 *_”I AM NO DEVIANT”_* *_”TWENTY EIGHT STAB WOUNDS”_* There’s my contribution

[@opalmoone120]

DBH

[@jeremypedersen6894]

The cake is a lie

[@fanatictastic5787]

W A K E. U P. L I E U T E N A N T

[@DeDerpyDerp_]

Its dangerous to go alone, take this. Its a me, Mario! The definition of insanity is doing the same samb thing over and over again, expecting the result to change All you had to do was follow the damn train CJ Thats all I got.

[@bernardobarrientos4007]

What's the thing in that one

[@sapphirefox93]

Wendy ‘s : roast everyone on tweeter Moon pie: reminds people that they’re talking to a marshmallow pie .

[@SniperJoeLieutenant]

I'm dead, but I don't need a coffin and some eternal rest. I need burgers and 25 Magikarps

[@doodlespiral7110]

I hope you're ready for 100,000 steps of egg hatching and disappointment.

[@Cnut_the_grape]

He has plenty of time

[@doodlespiral7110]

@@Cnut_the_grape there's something fishy about this situation.

[@Cnut_the_grape]

@@doodlespiral7110 that pun seems reaaaaally out of the blue

[@thereportofthemonth1504]

Don't you mean a square burger??

[@rohanjeetdas5707]

"Chiilldrehhh.... *nha"*

[@mcninjaftw4789]

Meaaaannnnsssss... *syeh*

[@rakidavid1866]

Haaaaappyyyyyy Yeh

[@peridaniel8265]

wooorkplaaaaayyy syeh

[@nocobot978]

Greeeaaatttttllllll.... yyeeeh

[@FrippNotFred]

Excussssssseeeee...... *eh*

[@AnUnusedPoolTable]

*I need a full version of the oompa loompa song from the beginning*

[@agent3840]

me too it was too good

[@justarandomhuman4043]

Yes

[@_bioptic_5051]

I heard the song irl

[@juliannahivick4923]

I think we need the full songs to all the songs he does

[@sl8103]

Same

[@iii-rin]

The Islamic institute is hands down the best post on this sub

[@ZeeshanMalik455wasup]

Not even lmao

[@ClownDollThatHasContemptForYou]

That's a polite way of saying "Fuck you "

[@ChiyoBebe.]

Best one was sad sister or the diss of Taylor Swift

[@abramo7700]

sponge man ice cone

[@Anderson-f4t6c]

Best response to a troll ever.

[@DeltaDanner]

“Not that anybody asked, but...” summarizes Neil deGrasse Tyson’s entire Twitter account

[@kyle857]

Danner I do love him though.

[@arifybush1203]

Good at science, bad at twitter.

[@therealdeal6659]

Danner If we based everything we say on whether anyone has asked for it, then things would be really different. Without one of your parents asking out your other one, this would even result in your cancerous self not existing.

[@arifybush1203]

The Real Deal But that doesn’t exactly apply to twitter. Giving out random condescending tweets isn’t fun.

[@DeltaDanner]

“Not liking Science Guys condescending tweets makes you cancerous”

[@kstanford387]

I can believe that Wendy's never uses frozen beef, because if their account is anything to go by, they have no chill.

[@joelrichardson5139]

One Dollar Reviews on the flip side, their comments are nothing but cold hearted.

[@imsexisttoair9877]

And I can see why you wouldn’t have to worry about undercooked meat...because they bring the heat

[@woofgonecrazy]

So everyone has a pun up their sleve now?

[@derpmcgerp8062]

XD

[@kstanford387]

Well, we could go on, but something tells me you're cold-hearted, if not a little animalistic.

[@tweevlebarr3528]

*ooh look what you made him doooo*

[@honeybee4738]

*oh my*

[@GESTOPTKANAALDJARO]

You know he had to do it to em

[@honeybee4738]

1.2k congrats

[@ahhgeez]

I read this the exact moment he said it on the video thank you

[@mememmeme4330]

As soon as it come on

[@Nugnugnug]

Okay, but that "amen" scat around the five minute mark was pretty damn impressive.

[@kirbbys]

At the time the "Roses are red" poem came out, there wasn't a color name for "violet". The color was still considered blue until given its name.

[@AFarmerCalledChicken]

kirbby YES

[@thatboringone7851]

I can't explain the relief that brings the 5-year-old-getting-angry-at-people-calling-violets-blue in me. Thank you.

[@GarfieldPhone]

WHOS THE SMART ONE NOW? NEIL? *SMIRKS*

[@trouserpantsful8696]

So... what did they call violets before that?

[@SylasTheShadow]

@@trouserpantsful8696 the flowers were still called violets, but there wasn't a color called "violet". The word "violet" (color) comes from the name of a flower (violets).

[@kingstonb8130]

I have ADHD and I need a sketchbook and a......ummmm......What was I saying again?

[@SpaceMissile]

...and a 5000-piece puzzle.

[@feihtyt2063]

As someone who has ADHD, BIG MOOD.

[@Evanflame-rk9xu]

Mine diamonds loops for the 96th time in my head

[@gyisdoingstuff9561]

Mood

[@muk3988]

What...

[@keroloss8427]

My jaw dropped to the Sad response church argument

[@invertedv12powerhouse77]

Kerolos S and its on a newspaper....

[@liaminator4950]

Beauty.

[@warbossbonesmasha3751]

Kerolos S ammeen. Am.eennm ameeeeen. mmmeeeen Mmmmmeenm amm.meennnn aaaaaaaammmmmeeeeeennnn

[@stopreadingthisusername9528]

*amen*

[@KingofCrusher]

That church sister one was amazing, made me laugh so hard.

[@chemolcalico6792]

We need the “AMEN!” song

[@EddieB-ready]

Stephen Seehorn I felt so satisfied by that response I had to swap pants... No seriously, I was so satisfied I forgot I was holding a soda glass and it spewed over me. Sad times.

[@vladimiradidas1945]

Stephen Seehorn yeah fuck that bitch. if you have such strict ways to make others fit in then your a bitch.

[@VoodooAngels]

And by "strict ways" you mean "similar interests and able to afford the activities". Yeah, whoever came up with that whole "birds of a feather" nonsense clearly hasn't be excluded from hanging out with people he has nothing in common with.

[@vladimiradidas1945]

VoodooAngels still doesnt justify being a dick to others for not 'fitting in'.

[@fuzzymilk]

When you're only 5 feet tall, you really don't need a man half your size

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@eudorajade5780]

I see you around and your profile pic is terrifying 👌👌

[@mylesco.5385]

Fuzzy, what is your profile picture of? I watched the video a long time ago, but forgot the name. Would you happen to know?

[@knottyfurball3864]

Myles Co. i think it was baby's ice cream or something like that

[@fuzzymilk]

Myles Co. It's from a memory hole video

[@fishkeepercole2464]

I have ADHD, and I need a clock and an airplane.

[@toiletbrownies5566]

Well then if you need those things then ok. I won't tell you how to live your life

[@fishkeepercole2464]

Woooooosh

[@demkidsplayinvideogames4875]

Woooooosh

[@danthediamondhedgehog3615]

Wait, what were we talking about again? I wasn't listening

[@lolaharwood4702]

I have no teeth i need a puppy and a climbing shoe.

[@butteredtoust7777]

I have died many times watching this dudes r/ series. Thank you so much Sorrow TV All the depression in my system has been washed away

[@bluemoon1115]

4:43 The lady treats her sister the way mine treats my mom. And she wonders why I don’t speak to her and I completely dote on my mom.

[@JayFAE12]

Who needs depression when you've got running shoes and oxygen ammirite?

[@thetacogamer500]

Exploring the Forgotten me in third grade does.

[@drewthatguy4933]

*Someone* finally said it.

[@NewPaulActs17]

i prefer pumps and boron

[@GlenTropile]

I prefer Doc's and cig's.

[@kai-parker76]

I read and listen to other people's woes. Offer advice. Usually comes around and gives me insight on my own situation.

[@zacharywilson9596]

6:02 She doesn’t get payed parental leave at her workplace... isn’t that illegal?

[@werb6209]

No, some states don’t require employers to have payed parental leave

[@zacharywilson9596]

The Twinz, throughout most of the Western World, paid parental leave is mandatory. I'm just shocked that the U.S.A. doesn't have it.

[@lynnr8290]

Zachary Wilson a lot, I believe the majority (but I'm not sure) of states do have that law. But that leads to, sometimes, (and I'm not trying to go on some big feminist rant but this is actually relevant in my life rn so it's a personal experience) having a harder time getting a good serious job. Employers who see a woman young enough to have kids who is married or engaged and think to themselves "we don't need to hire her just to hire someone else to do her job soon after" sometimes. So while it's a law at least in my state, it doesn't always work in our favor.

[@fellasyouknowwhenyoudrinkw2231]

Zachary Wilson not in america

[@tomsparey176]

Depends on state.

[@user-jn1wm3tb8v]

I sincerely hope the best for Wendy. She seems wonderful.

[@poggoestheweasl]

r/wowthanksimcured

[@kyrotonia]

I almost liked this, but I realized it had 420 likes. lol I dunno, enjoy.

[@devinward461]

Kyrotonia it's well past that point so go ahead and like it

[@hannahu.6220]

Hi I'm Posting Random Stuff

[@meezalamazala279]

I have ADHD, and I don't need any prescriptions or doctors to help me out, I need som- Oh look! There a squirrel outside! Uh oh, my dog just chased it up a tree... but my cat climbed up and- and ate it? Anyway, what was I saying?

[@danthediamondhedgehog3615]

It's funny, cause I have it too, with autism as well

[@wonderingaround945]

I don't think I have ADHD. I just don't pay attention to shit that I need to pay attention to.

[@lilian158]

Meezala Mazala is that the eye of Osiris? From destiny

[@meezalamazala279]

Bangoo yes.

[@lilian158]

Meezala Mazala CALLED IT

[@anthonytruong1061]

People like Sad Sister are why I don't go to church anymore lmao

[@mackle6136]

Anthony Truong people like her are why I never went in the first place

[@datemoboi3341]

SAME

[@machine_cow]

people like Sad Sister are why I go on reddit lmao

[@Zanklev]

Sadly it's people like that who make us look bad. They use "church going" and "christian" as a status simple but do not truly care about faith in Jesus.

[@BlartInc]

So if you saw a video of a pro-choice guy roundhouse kicking a pro-life woman, would you stop supporting abortion?

[@limeisntinteresting]

I honestly feel bad for the divorced, working sister. I hope she gets some good friends who will actually care for her

[@khanisrok6363]

1:26 in her defense, *hurt* is also a verb. You can *hurt* someone (please don't). The *hurt* verb conjugated in present, preterite and future is really the same. Sorry if I *hurt* anyone's feelings.

[@QuotePilgrim]

Khanis Rok, yeah, of all the people in that whole thread, the one saying that it's an adjective is definitely the most stupid.

[@Intothevoid-NIB]

Then the poster shouldn't have used it as an adjective

[@litedaya7657]

It was used as a predicate adjective here, and there is no word form that indicates future tense in english.

[@vitriolicAmaranth]

I know this hurts to hear but the present tense of the verb "hurt" is not the same.

[@staryoshi06]

Do you like hurting other people?

[@TostitosMangoSalsa]

As someone with ulcerative colitis, I can confirm we desperately need books and a light bulb

[@alphacentauri5090]

Can someone explain to me what ulcerative colitis is?

[@TostitosMangoSalsa]

Sirius a. Lots of cramping, urgency to go to the bathroom (up to like 20 times a day), lots of blood in your stool, it’s not fun

[@alphacentauri5090]

Azazel Potato Oh god that’s awful....

[@blacksmithpiano]

Azazel Potato damn, that is just horrendous. Sorry to anyone who has it

[@TostitosMangoSalsa]

Blackmsith2006 yeah and there’s no cure, just stuff to reduce the inflammation, my treatment consists of getting IV infusions every 6-8 weeks. The clinics are really nice tho I get free chips while I sit there for 3 hours (cause the infusion last that long)

[@mr.universe7049]

When Neil said "if rhymes were accurate", he didn't even rhyme anything.

[@ladicus]

i'm sorry but i'm gonna need a little less edge on that

[@axlthesnake]

Roses are red I just wanted to be included People who use this meme Are usually secluded

[@vincent-ow8ss]

I am an wine addict. But its ok because I have a box, air freshener and some rubber bands!! Im good!

[@screwtape05]

Ganos Thenie nice profile pic have you listened to the new album

[@vincent-ow8ss]

Haven Wilson of course I have. But it’s probably my least favorite. But it’s still great.

[@vincent-ow8ss]

Sam’s Stuff Thank YOU for being a tool fan

[@vincent-ow8ss]

Sam’s Stuff Whats your favorite album? Mine is Ænima

[@vincent-ow8ss]

Sam’s Stuff what’s your favorite Fear Inoculum song

[@baconkoen1025]

Yeah im suicidal, i need a bathtub and toaster.

[@satan9487]

>:c

[@jeremypedersen6894]

I need a chair and a bag myself

[@sl8103]

I can bring the bathroom cord

[@ilovetweek000]

i need a rope and a ceiling fan

[@ClownDollThatHasContemptForYou]

*_WAIT NO_*

[@Inferno144]

Didn't know Campbell's could be so fucking savage.

[@cffeebean3047]

Did somebody say. *C A M P B E L L?* CAMPCAMPCAMPCAMPCAMPCAMP

[@breakblake4823]

cøffee bean yessssssssssssssss

[@bathoryaria4127]

Right?

[@EMETRL]

"she has a job, therefore she does not have enough money" "I stay at home because my significant other has a job and pays for everything" "I don't have to care about money because I'm literally getting carried in the family"

[@jokefest876]

Starts singing amen. Me: rush to the subscribe button

[@jasondeng7677]

10:20

[@originaluseername]

the first action being described has a period, but the second does not?

[@noneofyerbisness8702]

@@originaluseername He hit menopause.

[@originaluseername]

@@noneofyerbisness8702 ok

[@ArtsyLGStyles]

@@noneofyerbisness8702 Dude I know it's been a year but you've gotten a chuckle out of me at 12:01 AM, mad props

[@sir.bantalot5854]

Respect for sister Wendy tho. She's a single mother working to provide and raise her child whilst her family just stay at home and let their husbands do all the providing.

[@InVinoVeratas]

Yeah, too bad her sisters are _soo_ entitled they have no idea how hard it must be for her, and to top it off they’re complete condescending assholes who couldn’t sympathize, probably because they _never_ had to struggle to provide.

[@sir.bantalot5854]

Bailey Green She's probably better off without their influence tbh, but being shut out like that can't be easy because she doesn't even have her own family for emotional support. Hope there's someone else looking out for her.

[@kyle857]

Exercise is good for mental health, but it is not a substitute for medical advice and required medications.

[@jahuahua112]

True. But depression is only uncommonly a real medical condition. Most depressions are not real, and are excuses to get some social media recognition. Virtually all depressions are rational and can be solved.

[@UltimateKyuubiFox]

Jack Ganbat Let’s play spot the neurotypical.

[@decode3667]

There are studies that said that those who are active or keep their body fit, they face less mental issues or depression. There are of course exceptions but in general, a fit body helps you keep your mind healthy. I think it is said that exercise feeds the brain with substances that relaxes it. Even adrenaline, such is used to soothe the mind.

[@freebird0147]

Just Some Guy Ok you would know, right loony?

[@chameleon7060]

De Code what came first, the chicken or the egg? Maybe it's not a case of exercise preventing or curing depression, maybe it's the fact that people who are depressed have less desire to exercise, or go out in general.

[@adampandit4326]

Last time I was this early, a woman was left very unsatisfied

[@lucyblack3893]

Adam Pandit Bad day?

[@curlyiscupid2811]

oop

[@UnknownMaster-go1lh]

Pretty sure you already do that

[@decafrutbeer908]

Adam Pandit was it S A M A N T H A

[@beyoncealways2911]

oOF

[@lowkey_out]

"Childereeeeeen eh" cracked me soo hard

[@h.thumbsthomas5479]

That advice column reply to sad sister was great. Sad sister is a horrible horrible human being.

[@joycor1419]

KillerDavis 68 She isn’t being straight with her and thinks the other girl is in the wrong for being upset. If you’re going to exclude someone purposefully, at least own up to it when they’re upset.

[@ninieibrahim]

KillerDavis 68 dude, are you fucking serious?

[@zyaicob]

Ikr?

[@thecactussword4304]

Heather Thomas Dude, yes. As someone who has had to deal with someone who actually had their head as far up their ass as "Sad Sister" did, and with a similar problem to boot, this was very relaxing to see.

[@EvilRaccoonDM]

"Just imagine your self hating thoughts are being said by a an uptight rligous women" "God doesn't love you because you dont see a doctor" "Every mistake you make will one day kill you and you'll go to hell." "You were such a mistake no wonder you're damned" "Thanks for the input Brenda,but fuck right off" THANK YOU TUMBLR

[@tired9351]

you will be the best youtuber you are the best youtuber you have been the best youtuber

[@Maestro_Gear]

2/3 of those sentences are false

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@djsilversun]

But he's literally just reading out loud stuff from reddit lmao

[@deli_9697]

Fred is the best KZbinr

[@Zombie81212]

He's entertaining but he is in no way the best.

[@arkasubhroc2]

Man, who in their right minds tweets at Wendy's? Everybody knows that's just playing with fire.

[@autumnsprite]

And with that, you have found the whole point of tweeting wendy's

[@williamreely3455]

"Make sure to enjoy it hot so it can help warm up your cold, dead heart." Damn. Campbell's is savage.

[@romelcasillas2286]

Dear Sad Sister........BURNED!!! 🔥

[@vladimiradidas1945]

StopReadingThisUsername woah there. If you were Starbucks, you'd be arresting black youths for no reason other than them being black lmao.

[@thatoneguykaboom7329]

Roses are red Violets are violet When I think of you I get very violent

[@danthediamondhedgehog3615]

So your wife?

[@thatoneguykaboom7329]

@@danthediamondhedgehog3615 ooooooooofff

[@w1nterdays]

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[@hatredmalice7273]

@@Noble06DS make sure the gun isnt backwards

[@spindash64]

Violets are blue Grass is green Omae wa mou Shinderu

[@KentuckyWallChicken]

Holy CRAP that dear Amy one was amazing. The person behind that better have gotten a raise for that. EDIT: THE CAMPBELL’S ONE I’M CRYING

[@thatzootsuit8007]

The Campbells soup one is actually done by a guy who makes fake company social media accounts and trolls people, its really funny! The facebook page is called "Hope that helps" and its run by a comedian called Ben Palmer. There's plenty of others on his page :D

[@JoyOfCreativeService]

I'm dying at whoever in the patrons was named "Megalodont"

[@kixel2859]

Lmao that one with 'sad sister' was gold

[@merchant_of_kek5697]

Wait so sense she doesn’t want someone who doesn’t fit her life she’s a bad person im a little confused I just don’t see the other argument

[@ul8532]

@@merchant_of_kek5697 Basically Dad sister and co were pretty rude to her, she compared her sister's life with hers like hers is top notch, assuming her sister is poor because she is a single mom and in sad sister reasoning being a non daily catholic and a single mom is sign of poverty (even when she said her sister Wendy have a job) also she justified her and her sisters and cousins with the excuse of "she doesn't fit in " and top of this they are family, assuming sad sister's words is probably an indicative that she and co never cared about her, if they did, in some point they surely have asked her.

[@tavvy4426]

People with Asthma don’t need an inhaler and doctors They need a suburb road and some Healies.

[@killawhale8726]

I would feel better if I had some heelies.

[@tavvy4426]

Yoshi_IX same..

[@wor4656]

Everyone *NEEDS* heelies

[@theweakestbrazilianmale3398]

What they really need is the *FITNESS GRAM PACER TEST IS A MUL-*

[@Flowtail]

pvolteminq i support this line of thinking

[@DartHypixel]

Legit just made my phone go off in class. We were taking a test. My teacher looked up but couldn't pinpoint whos phone it was. Jesus

[@Mika_3c33]

lol its 21:12 here so i dont really have that problem xD

[@Thunder-qf5dm]

SnowyWolfGamez You German?

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@Mika_3c33]

nah Dutch

[@loganhunt8029]

That happened

[@grant3888]

I'm drunk and that ending scream I fell off the stool laughing you sir just gained a sub and multi shares. Kudos and keep it up. I'm crying.

[@Sunny-yw8pt]

You still drunk?

[@jeffy3915]

@@Sunny-yw8pt what about now?

[@mahks-pectith3179]

@@jeffy3915 op is pemanently drunk, like a tavern npc

[@greenteesouo]

7:09 Splash now has the rare effect of causing a burn.

[@fastbreak333]

I didn't know that Magikarp can learn Scald.

[@Azzyzazz]

Gotta fight my way through all the damn clone channels to get here smh

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@harveydent-]

maybe bc reading reddit posts isnt original lol

[@Oliver-ex3cs]

but he is the god of all of the channels

[@NSFSponsor]

This wasn't the first or last channel to do this.

[@destinadams8713]

Honestly 😂

[@singan5746]

guy: Am i too heavy ? Seat post: Yes but not for the seatpost. *SLAUGHTERED*

[@shadowcultist]

Dwayne johnson: :(

[@Blaze-xe8cl]

Instant death

[@xaviig4219]

*F A T A L I T Y*

[@alliway2138]

The thing that ticks me off the most about the Sad Sister story is how that lady wrote to a newspaper to try and seek validation for her despicable behavior. 'Please, pity me, tell me I'm in the right and that I've done absolutely nothing wrong.'

[@LuciferSweet]

Reaching her things is a challenge for you What do you do, when you're half your girl size? Climb up her legs, fall asleep on her thighs

[@sugarwaterenthusiast1309]

*like a little kittie cat :3*

[@thecityshanker8913]

It’s reaching high things I believe

[@boletarianbread7349]

Yo falling asleep on a much taller woman's thighs sounds just fine to me

[@sugarwaterenthusiast1309]

@@boletarianbread7349 Same, bro

[@wannabelawnmower2590]

if the thighs be looking like sticks then imma say no

[@hesusthechosenone3597]

I just love those intros when he just sings some random songs lol :)

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@penapenis]

i skip em

[@ljubisavukovic8153]

I always skip it, the only reason I'm not upvoting his videos

[@FrancisR420]

siberian l_wolk are you kidding me "what do you do when you're halve your girls size? climb up her legs and go to sleep on her thighs" This shit is fucking gold

[@penapenis]

they suck

[@sagehamm]

I have anxiety and I need knives and a Christmas tree

[@AFarmerCalledChicken]

Amy Ingraham oh my god same!

[@wor4656]

What the hell is a christmas

[@ihatedmyoldnamesoheresanew7204]

I have low self esteem, and I need a fan and a pencil

[@ugandaknuckles5691]

I have add, i need a spoon and a......

[@TheOGPlatypus]

1:34 To be fair, exercise actually does help lessen the effects of depression, so while she’s a bit off with the idea that people with depression don’t need therapists or pills, cause those do help a ton, exercise helps too, and most doctors who prescribe you antidepressants will likely also tell you to go to a therapist and work out more

[@Monasaurus_Rex]

That's not true. When I work out my mind tells me working out is pointless and I'll be fat forever. Resulting me in being more depressed, so those scientists/therapists/psychologists lied

[@ScaredCat4]

@@Monasaurus_Rex Yeah, but while that might have been the case for you. When I was suffering depression, exercise was a very good outlet for me to focus my negative thoughts on.

[@arthurdent4791]

@@Monasaurus_Rex There are exceptions in every case. It's not that they lied, or that official studies were faked, you just fit in the 20%.

[@VoodooAngels]

@@Monasaurus_Rex Huh, here I was, thinking God made man in his image. Turns out, he made us in yours. Learn something new every day.

[@ArtisticallySpoken]

@@VoodooAngels Bruh, you didn't have to massacre my boy like that!

[@CrashJay]

8:56 also god damn I don’t know how it is where you live but red lobster can be expensive. Like Christ some people don’t exactly have the bank to make that easy

[@skyleviathan9669]

Also red lobster is awesome, those biscuits could make the most pissed off alien not blow up the earth just on them alone.

[@ElvenHound]

Can we just get a whole video of Neil Degrasse Tyson cringe and him being roasted by the internet for it?

[@devinward461]

Screaming Sun Pluto isn't a planet but his ego is

[@WTFisTingispingis]

Ego is also Kurt Russell. Wrap your head around that one.

[@mrmaniac3]

AtticWarrior1994 I can’t. My skull isn’t flexible.

[@ElvenHound]

Are Eggos a planet?

[@simplynoodles9304]

I have severe social anxiety, I don’t need therapy and breathing exercises, I just need to _immediately_ walk up to peoples face put myself in a panic inducing situation. (People actually seem to think this, interestingly enough)

[@CrazyDutchguys]

Alcohol is the real answer!

[@CaptainDoomsday]

Just find the person who seems to hate you most in a room, say hi to them, and you'll be fine because that isn't the easiest way to sustain irrationally deep emotional wounds! You know, that stuff neurotypical people never do!

[@fullmetalfangirl12]

Same. Kinda sick of everyone telling me I should just get over my shit like "Oh thanks I'm cured now" -_-

[@lukestanton9881]

I am a psychologist. Putting yourself into those situations little by little, starting with small conversations, can actually help, on top of other coping mechanisms. Avoidance behaviour may seem like the easiest way, but you will never get better if you just avoid all of stressful situations.

[@ebihacelik]

Pfft just go and give a conference, it will go away like bam

[@parkingl0ttr0ll]

My body is ready.

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@zakbexon9510]

Artificially Intelligent stop posting a dead meme I've seen you in 3 comments threads

[@hyperult3810]

Look at your profile picture and think about it. We're all memers.

[@zakbexon9510]

Artificially Intelligent we may like memes but your posting a meme from 2016 in 2018 normie

[@parkingl0ttr0ll]

Shhhhh. This has nothing to do with what I said. I don’t want these notifications.

[@swagmancoolkid1637]

I have psoriasis, I need a glass of milk and a window.

[@user-cs8be6uf6h]

*A M E N*

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@aponia2412]

*Amen.*

[@lillyie]

i have depression and i don't need medication, i need a rope

[@stevebailey8285]

Same

[@thegreatkingdedede7391]

Don't be depressi Have some spaghessi

[@BentleyS6336]

*U h o h* Seriously tho its been a year how you doing? I hope things got better yo

[@lukedobrin1485]

Um don’t die

[@InnocentC0]

Rope jumping is good for excersice, I think.

[@alexlindquist8380]

Sorrow TV: featuring people making fools of themselves and sporadic singing sections

[@mrmaniac3]

wibble02 I wouldn’t have it any other way.

[@NotYourPalGuy]

wibble02 isn't it wonderful?

[@aidenlee4352]

Queequeg RL Indeed.

[@kaylasmith4001]

5:45 You sound like the annoying twins from Charlie the Unicorn 😂

[@polyscient]

Chaaaaaarliiiiiieeeee

[@ibavider]

Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[@yamothaisaverynizlady]

The sister one made me tear up a little, I love my sisters so much and I have to work on including them, to so blatantly exclude them is sad. She just wants to be a part of the family

[@OpexNexus]

5:43 Oh, Chills helped voice this video? Cool.

[@Botan-VEVO]

LOL

[@ohboyitstheanti-spiral3978]

Chris Myers Burger King foot childreeeeeeen

[@DJL3G3ND]

lol almost I guess

[@MistSGM]

Chris Myers SAVAAAAGEEE

[@Oyasumi05]

Chris Myers i don't hear it

[@AsymptoteInverse]

2:41 I remember when that Ask Amy column came out in my local paper. Made me go "Dayum!"

[@EnclaveColonel]

Poor Magikarp, he's so mistreated

[@Alex-jg2bc]

I know. I personally love them

[@MrLuizilla]

Oh Neil DeGrasse Tyson. It's mesmerizing how such a smart person who has done so much to spread scientific knowledge can talk SO. MUCH. SHIT.

[@terryfuldsgaming7995]

It's really funny how many of you are too stupid to get Neil's jokes... making a stupid joke after his smart joke... is not a burn, it's just you embarrassing yourself...

[@martinabhame5790]

Steven Seagull Whoa there, r/iamverysmart! Get the Reddit users over here

[@TheKobe5s]

Martina Bhame lol this is going on reddit

[@MakeVarahHappen]

That's what happens when you fail to realize that just because you're good in one area doesn't mean you're good in any other area

[@NewPaulActs17]

the smarter someone perceives themselves to be, the dumber they'll act. damn new yorkers.

[@eclecticsunflowers]

1:31 That might actually make the depression WORSE. There's this thing called seasonal depression.

[@nightcollapse]

lol yeah, that one was just agitating. i hope she's learned from her mistakes and educated herself better on mental health

[@petercrockett7393]

Dan Wulf theres no such thing its called being lazy seasonal sickness is different

[@eclecticsunflowers]

Intervention oh really? look up up seasonal depression. it WILL come up

[@petercrockett7393]

Dan Wulf we cam argue about this all day how fake depression is because its not real its kids not wanting to go outside weekly

[@anynamebutmyrealone]

Dude, that is the one type of depression where sun-exposure may actually just cure it. They use phototherapy as a treatment you doofus.

[@avenfantasy7498]

A simple "Depends on the severity of the depression" is how I would've replied no need for the level 99 fighting a level 25 overkill lmao

[@the_god_abandinus]

I have memory issues, and I need a toothpick and an electric keyboard.

[@tidepodpadthai2633]

And uh...what was it again?

[@thegameres816]

when you and nate tv upload at the same time and you have to pick... i picked right.

[@thegameres816]

Miko The SquidKid. not from my notifications.

[@hyperult3810]

my nam jef

[@theallaroundnerd9889]

I picked both

[@luisd.mancilla8169]

Nate who?

[@jackfawn]

Luis D. Mancilla I'm guessing Nathan Sharp

[@NotoriousSRG]

“I’m a churchgoer” Translation: I’m allowed to be an asshole to people because I sit on a shitty bench and listen to some idiot read an ancient book to me for an hour.

[@Nutlicker683]

Aka: I go to a shitty book club so that excuses my shitty behavior

[@ZhipFrag]

Man i thought Magikarp only knew splash, turns out he knows fucking dragon rage with abnormally high crit chance. I shall assemble a full team of Magikarp now!!!

[@logoncal3001]

Dragon rage deals a static damage no matter the circumstances

[@ZhipFrag]

Which makes it an abnormally high crit chance yo!

[@bananamustard1151]

Zhip Frag idiot

[@Ribbons0121R121]

"buddy its saturday night and your talking to a masrhmallow sandwich on the internet" well youre a marshmallow sandwich on the internet

[@azelfdaboi5265]

He's a marshmallow sandwich on the internet, let him be

[@cookiecraftfriend1051]

@@azelfdaboi5265 Where is Uxie

[@DarkDreamsAndMoonlitNights]

No, YOU'RE a marshmallow sandwich.

[@antoinecantin1780]

1:34 How ignorant and plain stupid! I loved that guy's response

[@SmartAlec1]

Some people need it, some don't. It does typically help.

[@Ultimate_Gamer_3000]

Hey I'm depressed but twenty dopamines is twenty dopamines