SHOULD I STAY OR GO?

Hi, I'm Sharon Pope. I help women (and occasionally a few brave men...) struggling in their disconnected marriages determine whether they can fix their marriage and make it feel good again or if it’s time to lovingly release the marriage.
Download my ebook, Stay or Go: How to Get the Clarity You Need so You Can Either Fix Your Marriage or Move Forward Without Regret: go.sharonpope.com/stay-or-go-...
If you’d like to explore whether or not there’s a fit for us to work together to get you the clarity you need to know whether you should stay or go, you can find out more about the work I do with my clients and schedule a complimentary call here: www.ClarityForMyMarriage.com
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When you subscribe to Sharon's channel, you will get the tools and insights needed to either create and sustain a loving, connected, and lasting relationship - or know how to walk away as lovingly and peacefully as possible.
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My Website: www.sharonpopetruth.com/
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Blog: www.sharonpopetruth.com/blog/
About Sharon:
Sharon is a certified Master Life Coach and a six-time International Best-Selling Author. She has been published dozens of times, including in The New York Times, has 300+ blog posts and 200+ KZbin videos.

[@Superubertrooper]

Great advice. I spent years trying to make my ex happy but she could never open up and truly tell me what she wanted. I was working hard to provide and she felt like I was not meeting her needs but instead of talking to me about those true needs, she built resentment. She got her ideas of romance and relationships from fictional novels and popular movies. I realized that she is just stuck in victim mode whereas she could have shifted everything by looking at me differently. I contributed to this mess by not having a sense of my own boundaries. The amazing thing to me is that she is still bitter and acting like a victim 2 years post-divorce. I wonder whether she will ever be able to look at herself and change herself.

[@evonnevong5494]

I am in the marriage for 23 years. I am very unhappy because his heart loved another woman . I feel like I am being used . My decision to leave him because I don’t want to grow old and die unhappy. I did watch your 60 minutes session and I am more cleared with the final answer. Divorce

[@motheryuba57]

This is a great talk. She is very clear, straight forward, practical, pragmatic, zooms into the core issues without mincing words. All good guidance. I already made my decision to Go before listening to this talk. I will definitely listen to all her talks. I like the part about replacing the fear thoughts with a bigger truth. Thank you so much for posting this.

[@martellahawkins3943]

I am not understanding why this post not sitting with 500K or more likes??? This woman gave me so much clarity! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! She also gave me a moment of relevance. I now can say there is purpose behind my pain! I am now working to see if the marriage will work. If I have to leave my marriage, so what if the fingers are pointed at me. I took a lot through ten plus years and soon as I build boundaries then here is the crisis in my marriage. He can either level up or I am OUT!!!!

[@brendadean9291]

I do not understand why when a marriage fails people have the need to find someone else. It only creates more problems. I raised 2 sons on my own and have had a perfectly happy fulfilling life.

[@dianaroman2553]

One of my issues was my husband always putting his mom first and every problem we had He ran to her for support. In Teraphy he said that he always will put his mom first and move with her when she retired. That was the end for me . I always knew I will never be a priority. It sucks but I feel happy to finally make the decision. Thank you Sharon because I finally understand that my fears and not my reality . My biggest fear was to be a single mom , but I can do it . And I have my family support system.

[@southernsoul152]

I hope sending you a msg doesn’t trigger pain. My husband put his mother first and it’s a HUGE red flag. God says that a man must leave his mother and cleave to his wife. I pray you heal from his betrayal and know it’s not your fault and is no reflection of your worth. Sending you love 🙏🏽

[@dianaroman2553]

@@southernsoul152 thank you 🙏🏻 I love your message .

[@amandagary5310]

Me and my husband have been together fo 15 years and we are currently separated. I'm debating on just filing for divorce and letting him go because I feel his love is lost. This has shed some light for me

[@DAWMP]

Why did I pay for the ebook when the exact same information is being presented here?

[@BedfordFalls7]

This seems like it is geared towards younger women. Kids are mentioned a lot. I'm 63 and I'm in this situation. I have been in this marriage for 19 years and two engaged. My husband does not want to talk. He keeps to himself and there is no intimacy and never was. He wants nothing to do with it. He seems fine just the way things are. We always had separate bedrooms. I'm not okay with this. I thought when we married he was a normal guy. But once married he was full of anger and yelled all the time. So here I am full of anger for stealing away my 20 years. I have anxiety, don't drive and wonder how to make it on my own. Everyone tells me I have a fantastic personality, I'm young, pretty, kind and giving. Yet, here I am. I am stuck. This marriage was never right. I want out. I have wanted out since three years after getting married. I don't want to die living this way.

[@tatianachama4305]

My situation is prretty much the same, except for the fact he is a very nice guy. I have never understood his low sex drive, the lack of intimacy. I have been pushed away for 21 years and now he decided to go to therapy. I feel a lot of resentment and I think it is too late fir us. But at the same time I feel stuck, fearing tons of stuff.

[@michaelsalas7837]

Thank you again Ms Pope As I mentioned below thank you for your messages and this video. It reflects how I feel as a man, husband I try therapy recently on my own and without my spouse it’s hard to improve communication and fix the true marriage issues I’m stuck!!!

[@michelleg2864]

I know I am not perfect in this marriage but I am willing to make changes but my husband doesn’t. I have been married 17 years and I’ve been lonely through out. I have 3 kids (2 girls 1boy) There are so many problems I could relate to many things you said because I’ve said it. I really think I should leave but when the kids were little it seemed impossible but my oldest kid (daughter) said if I were you I’d leave him and don’t worry about me do what you want I will be fine. That makes me sad. That was probably 5 years ago and I’m still in in a loveless sexless marriage not knowing how to get out. Because what if I’m making a mistake, what if I didn’t try to change enough of me, what if the grass is not greener and what if I’m single for ever I’m not young anymore How do I even find someone else?😭

[@sobiaperez4484]

Wow!! I feel you 😞 I just don’t know how to leave I have up my job to take care of my mom who passed away and right after my husband bought his drug addiction dad to live with us to ☹️ We never have money to pay even our bills He is always saying he is going to make lots of money one day But it’s been 45 years He blames everyone for all of his Bad decisions🤯 And he blames me for all the affairs he had and even his drugs Help !!! I fill So alone 🙁

[@hortenciasanchez8456]

Wow this is eye opening.. how can we book an appointment with you?

[@lovemyfire4855]

How do you lovingly leave?

[@ileanaalvarenunez890]

Thank you Sharon... so much clarity in your presentation. I wonder how commom is to feel unatractted to your husband after 25 years of marriage?

[@brookesmith1550]

Lleana I am in the same boat!! I have not been attracted to my husband for years. He is a great husband, in shape and cute. But I am not attracted at all!!! It sucks! Married 20 yr and 3 kids and great life! No other reason to leave except no attraction. But I don’t see the benefit. I don’t worry about money and don’t work. I have the life of leisure and if I leave I will have to work. That would suck!!!

[@brookesmith1550]

Sharon I do appreciate the great things about him very much! But that doesn’t make me attracted to him!! Wish it did!!

[@ileanaalvarenunez890]

@@brookesmith1550 it's just frustrating.... he's dying for a hug from me and I feel no pleasure.... no desire. Its just sad!!!.... I don't know what to do... I have everything and I'm not happy.

[@heathersmith9044]

How does all this relate to an emotional abusive relationship or a marriage to a narcissist?

[@brookesmith1550]

My sister finally kicked out her narcissist and verbal abusive husband!! Proud of her! She now feels guilty she didn’t do it sooner, because her kids saw that she let a man treat her like that.

[@richardkeates9203]

Just watched this and it resonated so much - thank you - thank you Sharon :)

[@adrianquintana1981]

Your videos are giving me hope for healing and change. Thank you so much!!

[@sharonpopecoach]

So glad you've found your way to my work!

[@GwenMotoGirl]

I was engaged to a good man. I did everything I could, but he continued to disengage and busy himself with anything besides me. I do believe he was generally happy as things were, but I wanted more. I gave like a wife but did not have that title, and I realize that I shouldn’t have done that. I stayed too long with my ex-husband (years ago) and with my fiancé because of fear of future regret. Fear of regret kept me paralyzed. Both of them ended the relationships, and both of them did it abruptly and then blocked me. I must look to myself again to see where I have undone work on me, and just be with me indefinitely. Thank you for this video.

[@pattywhitaker7601]

This is my husband. He busied himself with anything and everything but me (unless it was time to go to bed….if ya know what I mean 😉). When I did manage to get him to spend some time with me, I always got the impression that he felt like he was wasting his time. He has an incessant need to “be productive”. Married 21 years just this past June 10, together 25 1/2, and Memorial Day weekend he told me he wants a divorce. Reasons: I’m mean, critical of all that he does and constantly complaining. 😳🤷🏻‍♀️. And now I can’t even get him to answer questions I have about his assessments of me. He keeps saying I’m going to twist what he says to fit my own narrative. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@GwenMotoGirl]

@@pattywhitaker7601 I’m so sorry that you’re going through this! It’s so unproductive for him to avoid thirds conversations. Fiancé guy and I were happy as far as I knew except for what I thought was the usual ebb and flow of a normal relationship. We’d both said we were happier than ever just 2 days before he dropped the bomb, and that was just 3 weeks ago tomorrow. It was only in looking back that I could see the distancing. With my ex-husband, that’s another story. We were both miserable, but I made a vow, so I stayed. I regret that I didn’t have the courage to leave. I hope you find your wildest dreams coming true. Life is short and time is ticking. I’m doing the work to heal my broken heart. I wish you the very best.

[@TinaMarieJ]

This has been amazing and so enlightening to listen to. I’ve already made the decision to end this marriage after many failed attempts at satisfying my husband & I lately have gotten more and more clarity as to what my role is that way I don’t repeat the same mistakes in my future relationship. If I could i would definitely invest in you for help. I am a recovering codependent and in an emotionally & toxic marriage for 11 years, together total of 16 years. Now the problem is comfort for me, he is familiar and that’s what makes it so hard to leave as well as having 2 children but we have already decided.

[@TinaMarieJ]

Sharon Pope - Master Life Coach they don’t serve me but they help me understand my patterns and behaviors so I am grateful for these lessons

[@KmNry]

What about when they change after years. Cos I asked to separate and then ended up had an affair. But now I can’t seem to feel like I can start again with him. I’m in love with my AF. How do I get over this.

[@sandersnider]

I need to get this book

[@TH-eb5ro]

I've just checked, it is ebook only and cannot find reviews which is strange. If you do please share.

[@valeriecasertano8018]

What if you’re married to an alcoholic and they refuse to admit that they ave a problem.

[@bobbieevans9309]

How can I contact you for help?

[@sharonpopecoach]

ClarityForMyMarriage.com

[@melkerner]

Sexless marriage for 15 years (even before Perimenopause), nothing, not even a kiss for almost 8. She simply has zero desire and refuses to seek help (medical or psychological). Ignores what our marriage therapist talks about, and is happy within her walls. Lazy, checked out - but says she loves me and isn't going anywhere - but won't engage in anything resembling physical affection to try responsive desire. She simply states she is happy to never be intimate or have sex again in her life - in fact she says "I never liked sex" - which is the complete opposite of what I experienced with her before marriage and the first 4 years of marriage. NO assault, violence or coercion - she is just gone....