Harry Potter except it's written by an AI

[@alfobrien7794]

Death Eaters: giving each other kisses and saying they like each other “Good guys”: *Ron ate Hermione’s family*

[@keisuketakahasi4584]

harry dipped hermione in hot sauce hermione put the deatheaters face in mud for wearing a shirt saying hermione has forgotten how to dance

[@gachabloxgirl3958]

dont forget harry tore his eyes out of his head

[@APerson5569.]

Ok

[@the_epic_memer553]

M I D N I G H T S N A C K

[@Ionknow..]

No HoMo

[@babykillingcadillac6719]

“I think it’s okay if you like me” “Thank you very much” 10/10 dialogue

[@AZRARICCIARDO]

when someone flirts with me

[@TempestRex_]

“Thanks, you too”

[@Phoenixqueen77]

This reminds me of certain interactions with NPCs, lol

[@davidschi3762]

@@Phoenixqueen77 oblivion

[@Phoenixqueen77]

@@davidschi3762 Y e s. Skyrim too, but not as bad.. And I haven't played Morrowind recently or enough to remember

[@Vixennette]

Person: what is your favorite Harry Potter book? Me: Harry Potter and the portrait of what looked like a large pile of ash

[@carddu]

same

[@fallon-may0935]

What, it is mine Too

[@iida9093]

True. The story is kinda confusing, but it's definitely funnier than othee Harty Potter books. That's why i love it so much

[@casnovak]

i like your profile pic. also i would say the same thing my dad read this to me and my brother....

[@victorhelp1571]

Same

[@Dylan-Frost]

5:46 I love how Ron didn't even bother casting a spell with his wand, he just threw it.

[@Sad.Boi.Lillith7]

And then took out his wand👍🦡

[@derpaderpy4931]

He's trying his best.

[@កម្ពុជា-វ5ភ]

And then everybody clapped

[@vlo4829]

He threw A wand and then took out HIS wand.

[@willdulevitz]

Well he threw "a" wand, then took out his, so the one he threw was probably not his

[@ryujinjakka4518]

When he said “Ron’s Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself” I felt that.

[@CatBat14]

Mood

[@masterturbo2218]

MoOd

[@cb_sketches787]

😔👊

[@Becca-hp4bg]

👁💦👄💦👁

[@sabrinar90]

What is wrong? -I’m in this post and I don’t like it

[@theinquisitor2682]

"Harry ripped his eyes out and threw them in the forest" ah yes i can't see him he cant see me

[@tranquilmagister8481]

....Harry, who could not see at the moment

[@Cllocopine]

“Voldemort raised his eyebrows at Harry” honestly me too Voldemort, I would too... Honestly I would probably join the death eaters in this version. All they did was wear a shirt about hermione forgetting dance class. I mean sure Ron did say Voldemort wasn’t a nice wizard but I’m not sure he’s the best judge of character....

[@kirandevkota7824]

A simple spell but quite unbreakable

[@amadeodante]

Big brain

[@Cllocopine]

Foll Trace Maybe Harry thought Voldemort was a basilisk...

[@gastonbell108]

"Sup Ron?" "Sup Harry... are you a ghost now?" "Yea, apparently...what are you up to?" "Just eating Hermione's family" "Cool"

[@laserdragon1253]

What about Ron magic?

[@kjc715]

“Ron, stop eating my family.”

[@laserdragon1253]

@@kjc715 No.

[@clownclown7639]

@Komaru Naegi *cries very loud*

[@kjc715]

@Hermione Granger-Weasley IMPOSTER!!!

[@strawberryj3lly]

I don’t what’s funnier the fact the book starts on chapter 13 or Ron being absolutely roasted

[@sagejennings4342]

He is the handsome one tho

[@jester3]

@sagejennings4342 nah since hermione eas dipped in hot sauce he can't be.

[@MrLoverman7134]

​@@sagejennings4342I'd argue that Harry ripping out his eyes makes him the handsome one

[@richardroberts187]

ron's ron shirt was just as bad as ron himself. a very rare insult

[@tashkent561]

r/Rareinsults

[@SR0144]

@@tashkent561 beat me to it and i lost to you by 3 months

[@Zedryx69]

hmm yes

[@khanhcai5106]

Scam Water? You beat me to your message by 1 day

[@stickmanedgar8265]

@@khanhcai5106 u also beat me to ur message by 1 day

[@trajectoryunown]

What I expected: Extreme cringe What actually happened: Literary comedic genius

[@ren6140]

*BEEF WOMEN*

[@elliotts7383]

E

[@breakfast_food]

The story was made by an AI

[@SilentYeti69]

*BEEEEEFFFF WWWOOOOOMMMMEEEENNNNN*

[@atheniansoldier811]

@Alastor TheRadioDemon an artificial intelligence

[@evirji7844]

“harry fell down the staircases for the rest of the summer” wow... that’s a long staircase

[@lucineidecarvalhodeoliveir5566]

RIP Harry's bones

[@KrysPGator]

Warned you about those stairs bro

[@eldritchabomination9726]

Or a short summer

[@evirji7844]

@@eldritchabomination9726 Smart😌✨

[@neighneighthecamel2700]

It's because he forgot to get his eyeballs back

[@Principalofthething889]

I love how Hermione doesn't seem to even care that her family just got cannibalized 🤣

[@MrLoverman7134]

Or the fact that he got dipped in hot sauce Also Hermione is now a he in the AI rendition of this book look at 5:40

[@Swiftbow]

@@MrLoverman7134 That "he" is referring to the Death Eater.

[@MrLoverman7134]

@@Swiftbow oh maybe so

[@Montesama314]

Hermione: "Oh my God... That was SO hot."

[@frozenminecraftmario]

@@Montesama314 ...

[@amirite2535]

“Ron’s Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself” “To Harry, Ron was a loud, slow, and soft bird. Harry did not like to think about birds.” Well, someone doesn’t like Ron.

[@amirite2535]

Ron: Throws wand Harry: "He's the handsome one." Ron: Flinches Harry: "Not so handsome now”

[@magicsnqil]

Remember he ate Hermoine's family though 0_0

[@starcat1874]

@Dylan Barnes dipping someone in hot sauce is not comparable to eating someone’s family.

[@purely_cringe3498]

@@starcat1874 Hermione has been through a lot though

[@Eeep-f7y]

Timestamp for the second quote?

[@SOB98]

It's only a matter of time before J.K. reveals that Ron was actually always a soft bird...

[@Cashimat]

Lol

[@downwordspiralofpiss]

A gay one too

[@alex-fs9yt]

Lmao

[@dindjarin1023]

What about Ron magic?

[@amberarmstrong2694]

and destined to become spiders (though he's not proud of it)

[@kaeruneko7299]

“Voldemort, you’re a very bad and mean wizard” *The Harry Potter series summed into one sentence*

[@Furymgs3]

"We're the only people who matter, he's never going to get rid of us." That about covers it.

[@MeanDean129]

savage

[@jjiingle]

i was your 1000th like yeey

[@averyrandall1896]

Savage: 100

[@infinitevirus4826]

harry potter and the chamber is loaded

[@GeneralGrievousCIS]

So to recap: a gang of judgemental loons with an incredibly poor grasp of magic aggressively interrupted a Death Eater meeting where they're politely confessing their crushes and being supportive of one's another's feelings. They judge the Death Eaters on their appearance. When their leader, Voldemort, arrives one of the psychos rips his own eyes out and they randomly insult Voldemort for being mean... he raises his eyebrows in understandable confusion. One of the psychos throws his wand at Voldemort and then they murder all the Death Eaters. So when an AI writes the story, Voldemort and the Death Eaters are the good guys 🤣

[@caseystone1454]

this is too good

[@olegyurchenko4127]

Don't forget that Ron eat whole Hermione family and Harry , Hermione + others are okay with it

[@AnMComm]

@@olegyurchenko4127 after which Harry dips Hermione herself in the hot sauce being hungry after all he did.

[@1ronEntertainment]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Irem-ij4iu]

“Ron’s Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself” *destruction 100*

[@sebastianthegreatest645]

*Roast 100*

[@ender4344]

Eric Lee savage harry

[@dannydethanos6994]

“The only sounds drifting from hagrids hut were the disdainful shrieks of his own furniture.” Roasted

[@mysticmemer4887]

Timestamp?

[@mysticmemer4887]

00F 100

[@lunalovegood858]

“They looked at the door, screaming about how closed it was”

[@natethegreat7881]

"Hang on, the door's closed!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH"

[@burningmacaroons7086]

"ITS SO CLOSED!!"

[@lunalovegood858]

Lol

[@stellathefoxgirl3648]

*"LET ME INNNNNNN!"*

[@crimsonhunter7598]

@@stellathefoxgirl3648 is that not from a movie From xmen "Jean let me in"

[@caya8638]

*Ron was going to be spiders. He was. He wasn't proud of that.*

[@APerson5569.]

Wow

[@shototodoroki2955]

That is one of my favourites

[@m4e7]

@@shototodoroki2955 are you the real todo...

[@shototodoroki2955]

@@m4e7 yes.

[@llawlietsdrtycakeplatter5477]

Akko you have come back for me 💀

[@Jumithia]

"The Dursleys had never been to the castle and they were not about to come there in *Harry Potter And The Portrait Of What Looked Like A Large Pile Of Ash* " I love this line so unexplainably much

[@EZheng-bd1bg]

That just sounds so much like something they’d say it’s perfecttt

[@dwoopy_cwybb_bunny]

Lmao

[@crazyfire9470]

Got to reach the minimum word count

[@Jumithia]

Realest thing i've seen all day@@crazyfire9470

[@tuvoca825]

Modern "mad libs"

[@kevinflynn521]

I would pay Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, and Rupert Grint to act this out.

[@evirji7844]

Honestly same tho🤣

[@neverlascairde85]

Do iz

[@thequeenofboba6583]

Dont forget about the Death Eaters!

[@God_of_all2008]

@@thequeenofboba6583 yea and you now who

[@pinstripe5487]

@@God_of_all2008 And Mr. Staircase

[@agsuko2041]

"He saw Harry and immediately began to eat Hermione's family" That went from 0 to 100 real fucking quick.

[@samiraperi467]

Mood: Rimworld

[@remz7019]

😂

[@richardbailey9119]

I would agree

[@justadumbkid8116]

Ikr 🤣

[@seanjohnisee]

Ah. A fellow intellectual.

[@acommenter4252]

What to do when Voldemort is behind you: Run: ❌ Fight: ❌ Feel a great overreaction: ✅ Tear your eyes from your head and throw them into a forest: ✅

[@MouldMadeMind]

Didn't he tear out voldemorts eyes.

[@sun-dried1]

@@MouldMadeMind no

[@moisty_booi5062]

Sigma grindset

[@helmetongrass1893]

I would just start eating Hermione's family just saying

[@triclopsgamer5934]

4:55 LoL 🤣🤣🤣

[@megatronhasfallen8459]

Can we give the Hufflepuff pig a round of polite applause for his promotion to Hagrid please

[@pundertalefan4391]

Little did they know that this is the backstory for the pig wizard in Goat Simulagor MMO. XD

[@randqmducky]

👏👏👏👏

[@e.2526]

Lmao 👏

[@summerbocor7105]

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

[@Sandra-yu4mf]

👏👏

[@theemeraldswitch4485]

This sounds like the dream a harry potter fan would have when they're on drugs.

[@grayskythunder]

I want this dream right now

[@acecosmiic9164]

Honestly seems like a dream I have had

[@starfleetcomm]

Its like ..........reality shifting but you'd been on tumblr before hand

[@chestercheetahisinyourwall4041]

@@starfleetcomm 6:31 true

[@vee8938]

@@starfleetcomm flashbacks to my friend doing 🍃 before shifting

[@gamingcookiereal]

"Voldemort, you're a very bad and mean wizard." *Destruction 100*

[@kingsockrat8543]

Harry said savagely

[@tejayplant7069]

Can’t come back from that one

[@idkutellme-rp9qe]

😱

[@lunalovegood858]

cammiecookies MEGA K.O

[@idkutellme-rp9qe]

MoonNoodlesTV no❤️

[@Moon404yt]

Things to do when you see your friend: a. Say hi b. Approach c. Eat Hermione's family

[@ohitsrusher842]

D. All of the above but you eat your friend to

[@justknowing0065]

E. Become a thermonuclear bomb

[@milkywaycookiie]

f. eat Hermione

[@pronectar6866]

do a frenzied tap dance

[@yoro__33]

:(

[@joel9104]

If the AI consumed fanfic this would be very different

[@saunteringvaguelydownwards6308]

Ohgod… MAKE IT HAPPEN

[@Princypal1lol]

You made me remember something that I didn't want to remember.

[@cybremystica93]

Dear god, no…..

[@olegyurchenko4127]

Or fanfics 😅 Wonder what will be in result if AI managed to consume original Harry Potter books + few hundreds or even thousands of fanfics...

[@tirsden]

The section with the death eater's kiss makes me wonder if they fed it some fics.

[@alex-fs9yt]

"Magic: it was something Harry Potter thought was very good." *Harry Potter series in a nutshell.*

[@pianogang2273]

LOL!!! : ) : )

[@godricktheminecrafted3113]

Nowadays it needs around 303826 teaspoons of gay

[@harsh9558]

@@godricktheminecrafted3113 nani?

[@yeticat3462]

Everyone thinks that magic is good until all your friends and mentors start dying.

[@Mizutsuntsun3]

@@godricktheminecrafted3113 I think i Know what this number stands for...........

[@nixishierfrei]

When the AI suddenly starts writing Death Eater fanfiction.

[@howaboutnow1895]

It's hot

[@natefischer4070]

It's the only well written thing

[@superdolphin440]

500th like

[@beanieteamie7435]

Like 1000 You're welcome. *tips hat*

[@TheGoodLuc]

It seems Harry and Co. are baddies.

[@Jam_Axo]

"They looked at the door, screaming about how closed it was" *wheeeeze*

[@starchildbeamy1684]

Sorry man, 69 likes already, I can't like this

[@allyepic4608]

*brendon urie laughing manically in the background*

[@xtrafries123]

@@elise6557 "BLOODY HELL THE DOORS CLOSED ALROIT!!"

[@worldpieceofmind2965]

loool

[@dumbass_pml1199]

alex McCormick WHAT I WAS THINKING

[@PajamaPantsStudios]

I came SO close to spitting out my drink when he said “BEEF WOMEN”

[@super-sizedmcshizzle6235]

“Harry threw his eyeballs into the forest” “Harry looked around and fell down the staircase” Me: .. *seems reasonable*

[@gachabloxgirl3958]

i mean, obviously ur eyes teleport back into ur eye sockets once u throw them wait r u telling me ur eyes has never teleported back into ur eye sockets?

[@zhenzhen2141]

Lmao tis is underrated

[@aidanlikesshoes6892]

...for the rest of summer

[@shototodoroki2955]

Yes.

[@milkywaycookiie]

LMAO HEY DEKU

[@alex-fs9yt]

_"Ron's Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself."_ Damn, way to roast Ron.

[@breadlord6698]

Yes

[@anicaaltre2594]

Yes

[@AndresAstua]

Yes

[@Nina-wh6hb]

Yes

[@anicaaltre2594]

Yes

[@theaartjourney]

“Voldemort, you’re a very bad and mean wizard.” *Voldemort has just been canceled*

[@lucytax9744]

Voldermort funao

[@Irem-ij4iu]

Yea I feel bad for voldemort now, Harry is to savage for him to handle

[@circa134]

Voledemort got roasted so hard All the conjured ice in the world won’t help that burn And he’s too proud to use the muggle ice

[@kokopelli434]

I need a fully animated version of this

[@Obsidianeyes431]

It exists. Theres a video where someone animated the story.

[@DragonFire666]

@@Obsidianeyes431 Where?

[@Obsidianeyes431]

@@DragonFire666 kzbin.info/www/bejne/rl7YdaGifK-Fms0

[@DragonFire666]

@@Obsidianeyes431 Thanks for the link, that was hilarious.

[@Kndrgla]

@@Obsidianeyes431 where?

[@skyisherelol3492]

"Harry did not like to think about birds" Hedwig:

[@chrisamey3674]

underrated

[@RyanJilbert]

They say Hedwig died from a spell from a Death Eater. little did they know Harry’s hatred of birds.

[@alandouglas2789]

кuяЪεяร 404 Hedwig: **A great overreaction**

[@TheUnavator]

ಠ_ಠ

[@namjooooon2081]

Ry Bread :0

[@3791ambience]

“Did you eat Hermione’s family Ron?” Dumbledore asked calmly...

[@lukesmith8896]

"DiD YOu EAT HerMIOnEs FaMILY RoN!"

[@gonzalograu8451]

Luke Smith That would be the movie adaptation

[@chasm671]

"HARREH!!! DIDJA DIPYA HERMIONE INDA GOBLETA HOT SAUCE????!!!!"

[@faeriebeariesasmr3042]

Gonzalo Grau I mean in this case it would be very justified.

[@MrRnea35]

DIDJA EAT HERMIONE FAMILY?!???!?!

[@FLS96]

I'm starting to believe my dreams are written by AI.

[@mariamalkasian2086]

Same XD

[@patricktownsend7154]

Damn, we really are in the matrix, huh.

[@ThiefOfNavarre]

@@patricktownsend7154 I was about to say the Matrix has us now

[@breenseaturtle]

@@ThiefOfNavarre I guess so we do have Ai in our brains

[@lola.millard17]

Lol

[@foxlover11]

'The castle grounds snarled with a magically magnified wind' Okay, yeah, not correct but not bad. Maybe this AI thing won't be so bad. 'the sky was a great black ceiling, which was full of blood.' I stand corrected lol.

[@seaweedbrain6152]

Ron: *eats Hermione's family* Hermione: *smacks with book* WOULD. YOU. STOP. EATING?!

[@jigoku4676]

OUR DAUGHTER ARE MISSING!

[@kazoo.wav_]

^J^ : GERMANY,GERMANY,GERMANY Does anyone know this cause if you do I will love you

[@THawkMedia]

Ron: What's the safe word?(in mocking tone)

[@kazoo.wav_]

Random female satanist Å yeee

[@FulcrumAhsokaTano]

lol

[@luxurious0346]

Ron is doing a tap dance; as soon as he saw Harry, he began eating Hermione's family *_Perfect_*

[@crappyaccount]

You mean delicious

[@walruscrazy4390]

You mean prefect

[@callm3pj]

Luxurious03 Must’ve been the dream spiders

[@TemphinFD]

He must of been making a horcrux being scared Harry was going to kill him.

[@chrisc4208]

Speech 100

[@oushiseer3895]

“BEEF WOMEN”, Hermione cried calmly

[@redapple7383]

Ron's Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself

[@cheesus4656]

Ron was going to be spiders.

[@TheMCMultitasker]

**Dumbledore asked calmly.**

[@OrcaTheDorka]

@@TheMCMultitasker and cut him in half with a chainsaw *calmly*

[@-.mune.-]

I ligit want to find and buy this book for the laughs

[@manisavvy9632]

“They looked at the door, screaming about how closed it was.” 💀🤣

[@andrew99877]

Harry: OH MY GOD! IT'S CLOSED! I'VE NEVER SEEN A CLOSED DOOR THIS CLOSED IN MY LIFE! Hermione: WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? Ron: I CAN'T GET MY BUFFALO SAUCE TO GO WITH MIONE'S FAMILY IF WE CAN'T GET THIS DOOR OPEN!

[@dwoopy_cwybb_bunny]

WHAT?? YOU CAN’T YAVE A DOOR THAT CLOSED! IT’S NEVER BEEN THAT WAY! UGH!

[@androidcommandroid7591]

I need "He saw Harry and immediately began to eat Hermione's family" on a coffee mug

[@karimakou154]

Great way to start the day

[@Mumphler]

I just need one that says *BEEF WOMEN*

[@God-nv7cp]

And fill it with hot sauce and dip Hermione in it. If the rest of her family was dead, how long did she expect to survive?

[@stpidstuff]

All of you, make a custom one.

[@thewalkingbread706]

That’s gonna be my yearbook quote

[@themcguinnessexperiment617]

_"He saw Harry and immediately began to eat Hermionie's family."_ Damn right, just as I remember it.

[@iikatulxe2786]

hermiones*

[@nadiabinford7349]

I read this right as it was said... weird

[@freddie-yb7hv]

Where

[@maddoxwise5840]

Yeah they keep a very good job at keeping to the cannon in the film version of Harry Potter and the mirror that appears to be made of ash when it comes to the family eating

[@andrewjanes7220]

just as any one would do in that situation

[@tabithathecat]

'An AI can't write a good story' AI: hold my Hermione dipped in hot sauce

[@nerdgrandpa]

lol..

[@lilvantasfan834]

1000th like

[@eddieslyfox1831]

XD

[@annast.georgecreegan3609]

are you worried about computers becoming too smart nah me neither

[@TheAgnulee]

Dont forget the mud~!

[@caraleekoopal5030]

"The password was...*long pause*... BEEF WOMEN." This is so out of pocket lol.

[@masterjr4685]

Everybody gangsta until someone starts eating Hermione's family and then dipping her in hot sauce

[@amadeosendiulo2137]

Dipping *him* xD

[@jhibbitt2896]

there's quite an underlying theme of cannibalism throughout this story isn't there

[@masterjr4685]

@@jhibbitt2896 pretty much yes

[@masterzoroark6664]

"Not so handsome now"

[@miss6095]

omg this was so good tho lmao-

[@Pumpkin525]

"Voldemort, you're a very bad and mean wizard," Harry said calmly.

[@francisthompson3772]

Harry, did you put your name in the Goblet of fire, he said calmly.

[@palak9465]

HaRrYDiDjApUtChANaMeiNtHeGoBLeTOfFiRe Dumbledore asked *CALMLY*

[@snailuka]

*VOLDEMORTYOUREAVERYBADEANFMEANWIAZARAD* Harry said calmly

[@DonutMaster56]

Hermione nodded encouragingly

[@mikkiasie]

Ron pushes his way in *_calmly._*

[@zvitleysa]

*Harry did not like to think about birds.*

[@jamesmartin6851]

*You are Hagrid now.*

[@loyalsdopeness8106]

*Harry fucking hated those shitty ass birbs*

[@KhrisIvanov]

*The dark arts better be worried, oh boy*

[@hufflepuffhermione8004]

@@jamesmartin6851 *T H E P I G O F H U F F L E P U F F*

[@CocoaRon]

Harry was never the same after Hedwig's death

[@JorganzaTheGreat]

“The Great Hall was filled with incredible moaning chandeliers” One reason you appreciate being a muggle.

[@comedyman4896]

The death eater scene was genuinely wholesome

[@quadpad_music]

I can't help to imagine smol chibi death eaters holding hands and blushing at each other's compliments.

[@RaffiP-od8dj]

@@quadpad_music bruh XD

[@Jazker_da_thief]

@@quadpad_music aww

[@chees2]

"I think it's okay if you like me." said one death eater. "Thank you very much." replied the other. The first death eater confidently leaned forward to plant a kiss on his cheek. "Oh! Well done!" said the second as his friend stepped back again. All the other death eaters clapped politely.

[@user-lv8qh3ej1k]

Yep

[@catygrey838]

*He saw Harry and immediately began to eat Hermione’s family* WELCOME TO HOGWARTS

[@ephimemacabre6449]

Caty Grey what a warm welcome.

[@mushroomhead3619]

Good Lord! Ron stop eating my mum! said Hermione as Ron chewed on Mrs Granger's leg

[@luco663]

Caty Grey yup. Welcome to hogwarts

[@scottdparrott]

Don't slurp the hair

[@sierrasmith6080]

Caty Grey such a nice welcome Also, nice profile picture

[@theunreadyone]

I need a t-shirt saying “Hermione has forgotten how to dance”

[@ender4344]

Hermione will dip your face in mud

[@vivekanand9944]

But then you risk getting your face dipped in mud by her

[@casnovak]

i would get a shirt saying that and another one saying "Ron's Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself." and another one saying "harry potter and the portrait of what looks like a large pile of ash" is my favorite book... or something like that.

[@marin-ss1sw]

Hermione can't dance Hermione cannot dance She only reads books And she cannot dance Even if she's reading A "How to Dance” book

[@missrileyriley]

I'll trade you for the "He saw Harry and immediately started to eat Hermione's family." T-shirt

[@zainalattar2775]

love how they made Hermione sound like an 80-year-old man who has been smoking his whole life

[@hourai0]

she sounds like Harris' Dumbledore

[@Hotdog718]

JK Rowling: "WRITE THAT DOWN, WRITE THAT DOWN!!!"

[@angelicastillo8243]

Charles the French yes

[@eddieslyfox1831]

mmm yus

[@BasiI_]

i see you are a man of culture aswell

[@dareo.]

Oh. Charles the French

[@spaceduck7503]

This is how she's gonna write the third fantastic beast

[@YTSunnys]

"Harry tore his eyes from his head and threw them into the forest"

[@ephimemacabre6449]

He must have been looking for something.

[@juntao3329]

YTSunny if I can't see Voldemort then Voldemort can't see me.

[@chrimigules]

Hardcore

[@Temper27]

Hi again SMM good person

[@walugusgrudenburg3068]

He did feel an overreaction

[@Lucky-sq3ky]

Person: "So, have you read Harry potter?" Me: "Yes." Person: "What book did you read?" Me: *"Yes."*

[@Elemy69]

"Harry Potter and the portrait of what looked like a large pile of ash"

[@justwoosh]

*m o a n i n g c h a n d e l i e r s*

[@caligraphy6497]

@@justwoosh "Oh, I read Harry Potter and the Moaning Chandeliers. It's a good book, you should read it too."

[@l_rob420]

Luckypugamer *B E E F W O M E N*

[@FulcrumAhsokaTano]

I read 'Harry Potter and the portrait of what looked like a pile of ash'

[@X.Arybdis]

Tearing your eyes from your head and throwing them into the forest as soon as you see someone is a pretty savage way of calling them ugly ngl

[@AeroRain]

*”Harry, you no longer have your mother’s eyes”* Snape said calmly

[@gachabloxgirl3958]

OH GOD NO. THAT'S ILLEGAL.

[@owlbearings2151]

*g a s p*

[@owlbearings2151]

@Malik Abdullah ikr

[@cirkulx]

“Snape pulled them out with his own 3 hands.” Sounds like something the bot would say next.

[@undomesticatedhuman]

*who has them now* lmao

[@joemcelroy7202]

I need “hermione has forgotten how to dance” merch

[@GammaFox6]

Joe McElroy Hermione can’t draw, Hermione can’t draw, Hermione cannot draw, she only reads books so she cannot draw even if she’s reading a how to draw book.

[@gdolphinz7486]

Your face will be dipped in the mud

[@MoriiDraws]

Bill Cipher which was just as bad as Ron himself, mind you-

[@nanut1203]

All of us white people can't dance. I can confirm that.

[@GammaFox6]

Nanut 120. I’m actually not that bad. I’ve been in a few musicals in my day.

[@joemamacaprisun]

The death eaters ARE the good guys they give each other kisses and Ron eats Hermione's family

[@maddsekai]

Lol yes- Also warriors name ayyyy I ship it

[@jorgenofalltrades]

"If you two can't clump happily, I'm going to get aggressive!" Hermione said 'calmly'

[@darkySp]

"RON'S RON SHIRT WAS JUST AS BAD AS RON HIMSELF" I CAN'T BREATHE

[@casstevens52]

@@eeveemation-studios Tyler Joseph 😁

[@deadpan904]

When AI roast you savagely

[@cheerfulellii7212]

Omg

[@theoneonyoutube4925]

420...

[@Jimmichang]

[When even your own merch is of terrible quality]

[@dannydevitodorito9631]

Scientists: Will this AI write a decent story? AI: *Well yes, but actually no*

[@nanut1203]

Not even your power will save you. You said that this story is bad, so I will call mi amigo verde Duolingo on you. He will eat your family as Ron ate Hermione's if you will not beg for your live in spanish.

[@dannydevitodorito9631]

Sí senior, Tu eres Una niña

[@dannydevitodorito9631]

Spanish Ur mum gay

[@roxannebednar9163]

Well no but actually yes

[@bashily2844]

Actually but no well yes

[@srishtysharma]

Hermione: And you are...? Ron: A loud, slow and soft bird. Harry: I don't like birds. Ron: what did you say? *Ron immediately eats hermione's family*

[@AlinaAniretake]

Harry: They're Rough, irritating and they gets everywhere

[@Nina-wh6hb]

“The complete 3 friends”

[@elation.e]

IMMEDIATELY!

[@MariOmor1]

Harry: I don't like birds Hedwig and Fawkes: *uncontrollable sobbing*

[@littlelemon3465]

***Ron was spiders. He just was.***

[@chloecarignan]

you know it's going to be good when there's a long pause before they read the next sentence

[@alejandropetit6573]

*BEEF WOMEN*

[@threegirlsandaunighostdrag906]

Me: Mom, can we get Harry Potter? Mom: We have Harry Potter at home. Harry Potter at home:

[@tortillaenlasilla2996]

underrated comment.

[@teddy-behr]

I don't see the problem

[@lumossk3657]

Yar mom's right, this shit better than what ya get in regular shops

[@lxripalecat]

This needs more likes

[@anastasiachebotareva9088]

The best part is when they ate Hermione's family

[@alex-fs9yt]

Ah yes, the most underrated character in the HP series: *Mr. Staircase*

[@bethkamuti6925]

“*Locked*”

[@mathiasklemp1800]

“*Locked*”

[@helenweber2006]

"*Locked*"

[@abyss_maal]

"*Locked*"

[@Microwave-dd7nl]

"*Locked*"

[@cmen6895]

“Ron’s Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself.” *AI is the future of technology*

[@GigaChadh976]

Ebola “Ron was going to be spiders.”

[@HINAYUTA]

"He wasn't proud of that, but it was going to be hard to not have spiders all over his body after all is said and done."

[@burbusburbus8782]

@ItsTimetostop as an American, we do not cry like a bald eagle

[@burbusburbus8782]

@ItsTimetostop I deserve this, but please at least put it on Reddit

[@isacplayzroblox1592]

God dang it al!!!

[@happyelephant5384]

Time traveler: moves chair harry potter:

[@thallionalfirin854]

"Voldemort raised his eyebrows" Unfortunately, Voldy does not possess the ultimate power of raising his eyebrows. Because he doesn't have any.

[@Anonymous-lx3dh]

Makes it all the more funny 😂

[@liusiteng6690]

Now that is expert talk right there

[@HarryPotter-go7ef]

404: eyebrows not found.

[@januaryravelo4342]

F in the chat for Voldemort

[@100milliondesigns7]

F

[@ihaveanunoriginalprofilepi1744]

accurate things to the books: -randomly bringing up how non-magic the dursleys are -randomly going to Hagrids hut -random inanimate objects are alive -green light

[@meowdyllic]

-mr staircase

[@cadenceolivia6304]

-crazy amazing things in the great hall

[@DarkAngelEU]

Ron, Hermione and Harry being rather self-aware they won't get expelled because they are the protagonists in the story.

[@cadenceolivia6304]

@@DarkAngelEU what did you do?

[@DarkAngelEU]

@@cadenceolivia6304 Nothing. They made me.

[@shydreameress264]

Neville: Dammit I've forgot the password again, I can't get into the Gryffindor tower ! Hermione: Don't worry I know it. *inhales* Hermione: B E E F W O M E N ! Fat lady: That's rude, but correct.

[@crypeton]

Why does this only have 94 likes?

[@yourfriendlylocalhitman667]

Nice

[@awesomespurr3606]

Oof

[@crypeton]

@Dartanimations oh my

[@HankSmashes]

@Dartanimations Ya mean 1.3K Likes?

[@iamcringebutiamfree123]

i love how voldemort was all "um dude wtf" but *harry could not see anything in the moment*

[@Iron_cladius]

Harry: *casually tears out eyes and throws it in the forest* also harry: *cant see*

[@strawberrymilky8822]

So that's why he fell down the staircase the entire summer

[@slavicakocirova5005]

@@strawberrymilky8822 **slips down staircase**

[@Jartran72]

Casually? The story told us he had an overreaction

[@matityaloran9157]

What happened to his glasses when he did that?

[@lololololol1342]

@@Jartran72 a *great* overreaction

[@izzylacroix4131]

"The sky outside was a great black ceiling..." Me: Okay, okay, not bad-- " *which was full of blood.* " Never mind.

[@rileyl2046]

This is a world with wizards, who says there isn't tons of blood in space?

[@psyxanmendoris]

Sounds like my basement.

[@jp5394]

That AI learnt about writting skills on fanart forums

[@chillingchill6823]

Edgy

[@Necroskull388]

Me: “How can you possibly OVERreact to Voldemort standing right behind you?” AI: “Harry tore his eyeballs from his head and threw them into the forest.” Me: Okay, yeah, that would do it.

[@eb8170]

Harry, I don’t think an “Eye Of Ender” is crafted by throwing eyeballs in a forest…..

[@jellycore1316]

@@eb8170 Ayyy XD True, maybe he was trying to find the Fortress But without being able to see if he did XD

[@ashglasss]

I read that as that moment played

[@rattersworld1016]

LOL yeah

[@notageologist3022]

He didn't have the blaze powder and thought the ender pearls would lead him to the stronghold

[@arcsoned1112]

My favorite quote from a book: “Magic: it was something that Harry Potter thought was very good.”

[@Becca-hp4bg]

Death Eaters: I like you very much * kiss on the cheeks * The main trio: "TORE HIS OWN EYES AND THREW THEM IN THE FOREST" "EATING HERMIONE'S FAMILY" "DIPPED HIS FACE IN MUD"

[@jasonchiu272]

**Proceeds to fall down the stairs for the rest of the summer**

[@TOASTERBOI_2004]

@@jasonchiu272 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@SomeStickmanGuy]

You mean Her?

[@Becca-hp4bg]

@@jasonchiu272 lmaao

[@heyitsella117]

@@SomeStickmanGuy no, hermione dipped Voldemort's face in mud

[@nebula_the_starfish]

When life gives you eyes, *tear them out and throw them into the forest*

[@BHC7966]

* Voldemort raised his eyebrows at Harry, who could not see anything at the moment.

[@tangyleni3349]

Ultra Ultimator oof

[@darkthunder301]

*Y E E T*

[@thefiretruck9604]

@@BHC7966 *WHAT EYEBROWS!?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!*:

[@dracomalfoy586]

great advice

[@shogun4892]

"Ron's Ron shirt was just as bad as Ron himself." The AI really fucking hates Ron, apparently.

[@matityaloran9157]

Don’t a lot of fan Fiction writers hate Ron?

[@shogun4892]

@@matityaloran9157 Fair enough lmao

[@Nina-wh6hb]

*BEEF WOMAN*

[@ananyanyan]

It hates Hermione too, every character here bullies her

[@whatisupmyfellowamericans8808]

The AI really fucking hates everyone, including the reader

[@EccentricGentelman]

"We're the only people wo matter, he's never going to get rid of us." In a way that's actually a perfectly accurate portrayal of the books.

[@oxsof]

"Hey what's your wifi password?" " *BEEF WOMAN* "

[@prakhar6334]

@Jean-Baptiste Couturier-Otis That's my google password wth

[@prakhar6334]

@Hunter Ellerman To easy, "R O N M A G I C" more like it

[@Danonka07]

Oh yeah. Now im gonna make this my password

[@theguywhoasked3833]

Bro what the fuck its my fortnite account password

[@natechicken685]

@DJ KZbinr TMJ **YOU HAVENT DONE YOUR DAILY GERMAN!** said duolingo bird holding bloody knife calmly

[@tripwire202]

"Ron was going to be spiders. He just was." I -- I have no words for these words

[@florenmage]

Yea but he wasn't proud of it! XD

[@Starlightnova111]

_HE JUST WAS_

[@pundertalefan4391]

My little brother cracked up over that line.

[@b-imagine3395]

I headcannon that this alternate reality Ron has a spider fetish

[@sentimentalmariner590]

@@b-imagine3395 my head Canon is that you never said that and we never spoke. I will now enjoy my blissful ignorance spiderman.

[@Drawnonstop_]

Snape: Harry, you have your mothers’ eyes Harry: aggressively rips eyes out of face

[@isabellejustcuz6075]

that sounds like something that would be in asdf movie

[@iamcringebutiamfree123]

damn son how spiteful 😂😂

[@hanaribooru]

bet hes gonna give his eyes back to his mother

[@thehumanspider7]

@@isabellejustcuz6075 i like trains

[@badl2279]

@@thehumanspider7*hello*

[@lyv.laughlove]

“What’s your favorite Harry Potter book?” “Oh, Harry Potter and the Portrait of What Looked Like a Large Pile of Ash is so good! 😊”

[@BarterTom]

I'm surprised Voldemort didn't give Harry an expired coupon for new parents.

[@darylzacharyong9855]

New parents

[@phantomzrambo7523]

I’m surprised Ron didn’t birth hermione

[@_darknight134]

This is a Voldemort Joke

[@NitroniumProductions]

The REFERENCE!

[@NitroniumProductions]

@@Cake_Axelson ik

[@maurice1987]

*Ron's Ron shirt was as bad as Ron himself.* *"What about Ron magic?"* 😂😂

[@spamtongspamton7878]

*hyper ron magic intensifies*

[@prakhar6334]

@@spamtongspamton7878 Bro what you doing here the titans are at the wall

[@aliteralpotato873]

@@prakhar6334 I- I think he's dead, he hasn't replied for 2 months

[@yarnball1190]

The- What?

[@gardenGnostic__]

I'M LITERALLY CRYING I'M GONNA DIE FROM LAUGHTER

[@rockfiish]

Ron eating Hermione's family: Hermione's dentist parents: sTOp! thiS cAnt bE gOoD fOr yOuR tEETh!

[@schwarzeseis4031]

a dentist a day keeps toothrot away. but two are to much teeth turn into sludge

[@dinnerboons1504]

@Eric Lee Mario?

[@schwarzeseis4031]

@KALEB KEENAN but only in may

[@phrogdeku5913]

STOP STOP STOP YOUR GOING TO TAKE YOUR TEETH OUT, BESIDES YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG

[@katk631]

@@schwarzeseis4031 💀

[@rswgj]

"It seems like the death eaters are the good guys" They forgot how to magic. BEAMS OF LIGHT SHOT OUT OF THEIR HEADS? Had me laughing so hard.

[@samuelloo1395]

"They looked at the door, screaming about how closed it was" This summarizes my country

[@zephyrian1006]

Where the heck do you live

[@joshsumner9793]

The people demand an explanation

[@nanut1203]

​@@zephyrian1006 Germany, Berlin. 13th of August, year 1961.

[@remy_ratking]

I love this, and it barely matters where this is.

[@zephyrian1006]

@@nanut1203 that's my fockin birthday

[@joyjones8231]

"I'm Harry Potter," Harry began yelling." The dark arts better be worried, oh boy!", really summarizes the actual entire book series I think.

[@captainyulef5845]

Nothing needs said here

[@appletree6898]

Honestly, some of this seems like shade from the AI

[@rentisme]

While falling down a staircase

[@thehumanspider7]

@@rentisme for the rest of the summer 😂

[@WillowsVeganBakery]

yeah

[@SchrodingersCat8813]

"Ron was standing there and doing a kind of frenzied tap dance. He saw Harry and immediately began to eat Hermione's family" You know, give AI credit...none of us saw that one coming.

[@sharkuel]

Neither did Hermione's family I bet

[@mrdredward129]

It subverted our expectations. Thats *ALWAYS* a good thing.

[@the_better_tokito_twin]

Imagine Draco is just awkwardly sitting at the meeting, hating every second of it....and all he hears from outside is "BEEF WOMEN"

[@Oueenazolatigressgina]

Voldemort seems like the most normal person in this story 🤣🤣🤣

[@pocketmarcy6990]

What the Fuck Harry, ripping your eyes out like that

[@abm5119]

@@pocketmarcy6990 Seems like a great overreaction

[@lennygirlthetruesavvysavag2410]

My garage door opener broke today

[@2ndio405]

"Did you know that random crits in tf2 cause unbalenced 3x damage radomly." " hermionie, if you keep ranting about tf2 ill eat your family again."

[@gothicbump]

Lmfao true

[@Helenavanthof]

_”Voldemort raised his eyebrows at Harry”_ Wait a second. Voldemort doesn’t even have eyebrows :O

[@JasminMiettunen]

And now Harry doesn't have eyes...

[@alexk9642]

i was thinking the same thing

[@skipp3252]

Wait you're right, I didnt even think about that!!

[@Eymologymentality]

Yeah, that's because he raised them so high.

[@meloniejen8400]

He can still make expressions without hair

[@hannahbibby4]

ron was going to be spiders. *_he just was_*

[@madisonbrooks8672]

He wasn't proud of it, but it would be very hard to not have his entire body be covered with spiders after all is said and done.

[@shryoder]

Madison Brooks *"Look," said Hermione." Obviously there are loads of Death Eaters in the castle. Let's listen in on their meetings."*

[@dumbsnoopy808]

MMMMMMmmM

[@cienkitv2854]

han. I AM SPIDERS NOW

[@Kapin05]

It's quite the tragedy - Ron cannot control his spider ability. It reminds me of an old tale passed on from hundreds of years ago: "Spider-Man, Spider-Man, Does whatever a spider can." - Mahatma Gandhi, 1337 BC

[@dramalexi]

I'm impressed. The AI is more intelligent than I thought. It understands that Harry cannot see after he threw away his eyes.