Spooky House: The Worst Halloween Movie Ever

[@potatoesfordayz4607]

Princess (the goat) was actually Max's biological mom the whole time, she turned into a goat to punish him after he said that he wouldn't eat his vegetables.

[@boiledquarters6859]

LMAOOO

[@thatflythatlandedonmikeshe7588]

Love that

[@sundaepepper]

I have not watched this video yet. Wth

[@potatoesfordayz4607]

Haha, it’s near the end

[@deicide888]

LMAOOOOO

[@angie.luvi1]

Moral of the story: always have a good right cross

[@jumpyjumpjumpjumps2369]

And always have some meth on you at all times

[@jaymesigler6402]

I saw this comment before I watched the video and I thought it was something about fighting demons or something. 🤣

[@Harmony-dg8ck]

t eat

[@Luigi-nn1gx]

No, a GREAT right cross

[@notatrollll]

No it’s a greAt right crah-aw-us.

[@sara-ng4mz]

just a magician whispering "i hate children" in the middle of a trick completely unprompted, you know, as one does

[@splishh]

john mulaney ghost wrote this

[@rice_bullets]

i thought he said "i hate killgrim" for the first couple of times

[@Ominous_Bambi]

I figured they were having a whispered argument the whole show.

[@OhNoBohNo]

Them’s the magic words!

[@ZeranZeran]

I had a magician do this at my party when I was 9 and then the dove pooped on my friend and I laughed Okay the first part is a lie but the dove really did poop on Dane. DANE, YOU GOT DOVE POOPED

[@NotBavarian]

I think Zamboni is actually shockingly logical. He's a depressed eccentric magician, who lost his career because of what he thought was an accident. Let's not forget a bunch of children also did keep showing up and breaking into his house, so it was very logical for him to yell at the kids for continuing to pester him. The only part I don't think he's logical, is the end where he just forgives his wife, like bro you really just going to be a Jaguar for 11 years without telling me.

[@arisu_6635]

tbh that was also my thought, also they break into his house

[@dalys1155]

Fr 💀💀💀

[@godofchaos9571]

And the way they make it out that he hates kids is a bad thing. I mean, yeah it's weird he said it but he's allowed to not like kids. He whispered it; it wasn't like he said it a kids face or worked somewhere where he delt with the children.

[@SunnysFilms]

She basically just shows back up because he decides he wants a kid now. Imagine if the genders were reversed and some guy did what she did just because his significant other didn't want kids. And what if Max does something she doesn't like? Is she going to disappear on him too. The real villain in this movie is Dawn Star.

[@VortexBroAnG]

2K and 5 replies? Let me fix that

[@brendancoulter5761]

Lets remember, Zamboni was arrested on suspicion of killing his wife. So Dawn Star heard him say "I hate children" for no reason in the middle of a show, turned into a jaguar for 11 years and then came back and no one questions it. She framed Zamboni for her own murder so that she could live out her fursona.

[@thefungiwhisperer2313]

And lets not forget some fantasy of petplay that was being fulfilled

[@spencer2990]

Breaking news: famous magician, Zucchini, was framed for murder by his wife in order to live her true fursona, Shadow. An angry riot on social media is being formed since his wife has yet to face any charges. Tune in for next time, where we cover a group of kids that’ll be punished for breaking into an unfortunate individual’s house on several occasions.

[@hollyhobgoblin8838]

Gone Grrrrrrl

[@0NeeN0]

Also he stopped believing in magic, which in this universe is love, because she wasn't there anymore, it makes real magic possible so when he liked Max and adopted him so that's why magic happened and she came back

[@layna-heyhey]

the original gone girl?

[@emmagauthier9258]

Max talking about the house: “So, this could be an office...” “Or maybe a nursery.”

[@ashlynn1376]

Max doesn't even like that backyard for him. Its all pavement. Max thinks it needs grass

[@shytoad720]

@@ashlynn1376 in case there are any lil guys runnin around

[@wambsdyke]

“This is a spinning hypnosis room of torture...” “Could be a nursery.”

[@dionysusfilms165]

*john mulaney wiggle*

[@amylomo9793]

are these fans of the proud asian-american woman?

[@danivaav]

I love how in "Monster House" the kids lose a ball or something, but in "Spooky House" the kids lose...a goat.

[@danivaav]

@@taralamlam1961 bruh, what's up with you? lmfaoooo

[@Gorbgorbenson]

Monster house was my favorite Halloween movie

[@espifreak]

They have loose pet laws in this town.

[@gillianfleischer5620]

Yeah but monster house terrified me as a kid

[@humanperson8903]

@@danivaav they deleted it but i know who you mean its a bot btw

[@thegoblin.youknowtheone.7051]

When he said “there’s a crazy twist at the end” and then “you’ll remember we haven’t seen the jaguar again yet” I legitimately thought the kid was gonna open the rocket and get mauled by it

[@ankeeno]

I thought the rocket will explode too

[@pyktkmrge]

Booooy I was hoping

[@giantsalamander]

that would’ve been such a funny fucking way to end the movie

[@thisdeath]

am i the only one who thought it would be empty?

[@angryviolentwitchqueen6633]

This is just the Halloween version of the Scales movie ending 😂

[@Vivienne30]

The lesson of this movie is: if you want kids but your spouse says no just turn into a jaguar for 11 years and they'll come around

[@pretty948]

I don't wanna have kids

[@adrianaheiler9794]

I'd definitely prefer having a pet jaguar to having kids. Heck, I'd even prefer a car jaguar to having kids.

[@hermitcrab_213]

Reading this before watching the video with absolutely no context was a real treat

[@moonlight.8831]

What a great lesson for my kids :D

[@abi_8765]

Whoop This comment really spoiled the plot twist

[@rachaelmoeller120]

I thought when he said "I hate children", she ran away cause she was pregnant, and Max was gonna turn out to be his biological son.

[@adamehta6179]

Makes more sense than the whole movie

[@jyotsna3617]

You are pretty good at script writing

[@0.001mm_tolerancy]

I assume that after The Great Zamboni said that he hates children, his wife was transumted into a Jaguar as his punishment and this curse wouldn't be lifted until he learned to love children.

[@pandapooh1668]

@@0.001mm_tolerancy ikr it was so obvious to me, wasn’t even a plot twist imo 🥱

[@laurencrisp9904]

That's what I thought would happen too!

[@draimannebeker9435]

Everything you need for a good movie: 1. A creepy guy that likes to watch children suffer 2. An orphan that can't stop telling you about it 3. Exploding Wives

[@vinnamon]

Brb gonna add this to my story rq

[@Bruh-ob9mi]

The holy trinity

[@MuskanJ]

*describes Harry Potter and the prisoner of Azkaban*

[@draimannebeker9435]

@@MuskanJ I mean that does pretty much sum it all up doesn't it.

[@MuskanJ]

@@draimannebeker9435 fr

[@sof_t_]

I like that Zamboni does not even question Dawn after she turns back Like she framed him for murder and let him simmer in his trauma from literally killing the love of his life and he doesn't even flinch when she appears again Shit I guess he's just that good of a performer

[@jappa4977]

Can’t wait for Danny’s new song, “Can’t Believe This No No No”

[@FTZPLTC]

Yeah, that needs to happen.

[@thornless_flora]

Make it happen

[@meow5770]

watch him do this

[@notoriouswriter8759]

Glad i’m not the only one thinking that

[@helicoptermangirl1524]

Same

[@tripsplat]

In regards to the bit about the Jaguar getting her tail "ever so slightly" stuck in the couch and appearing to be in agony over it - any cat owner can tell you that that's exactly what would happen. Doesn't matter that she's a majestic killing machine made of pure muscle and, I guess, magic - any cat that's lived under a domestic roof having meals freely and regularly develops the most SEVERE baby brain imaginable. This is the most believable part of the film to me.

[@gayjayy]

Can confirm. Our cat will get in the way, and when you push him gently with your foot he gets all offended and meows and stares at you.

[@kkrup5395]

I missed the part where "any cat owner" became a jaguar behavior specialist

[@tripsplat]

@@kkrup5395 "Only Critical Thinking is allowed in Danny's Kingdom. NO JOKES, GREG"

[@kkrup5395]

​@@tripsplat sorry, it didn't seem to me that that was a joke, more like an expresion of an opinion. Or even a start to a conversation about beliveability of the movie. So I just wanted to point out a flaw in your argumentation.

[@foxbuns]

@@kkrup5395 it was definitely a joke dude

[@Wafflehouse-k5u]

“Is that even legal to do can you just walk a around with a jungle cat” uhh yeah probably in Florida

[@ten1390]

As a Floridian I can say that Florida is insane

[@todietootoo]

Cause anything goes in florida🎼🎼🎼

[@somethingoriginal7710]

Not only jungle cats but pythons as pets to

[@kurtispittman2103]

*TIGER KING INTENSIFIES*

[@ImGabeChan]

We should ask Drew

[@FriskFriskus]

Imagine being some random guy in the audience with no clue that she went missing just thinking he made someone random woman appear

[@Avruthlelbh]

I mean, most of them would be like that. A decade or so had passed, and the majority probably wouldn't know exactly what she looked like, assuming they even knew what happened to begin with.

[@Wifies]

Next year we better see spooky grandpa on the track or I'm going to be dissapointed

[@hoopaschnoopa334]

Wait you watch Danny Gonzalez-

[@ratedpending]

spooky funeral

[@muffinsandbeans714]

Wifies stop commenting so much man are you ok lol

[@Seni.xoxo1e]

no no spooky dad

[@anomracanairo]

Spooky dad

[@E3003Obi]

Wait that isn’t normal? My grandma was a pet lizard for 40 years because her husband said he didn’t like cherry pie

[@cervineBotanist]

what??? does this mean????????? i wish for a timestamp to explain this please, i mean, you dont have to, but i cant find what you're talking about?

[@jroxpone]

@@cervineBotanist because the wife turned into a jaguar cause her husband said he didn't like children. supposedly. their comment is a joke on that. "oh so its not normal to change into a pet animal of some sort when your significant other says they don't like something??"

[@ej6975]

@@cervineBotanist I haven’t watched the video yet and this comment gave me whiplash

[@uncodedconnections4715]

My uncle told my aunt that they didn’t need a gun for self-defense, so to prove him wrong she’s been 30-50 feral hogs for the past 20 years! Idk why Danny’s acting like this isn’t a normal occurrence

[@codacrafts747]

My aunt was a hamster for two years then she came back and told me that is sucks being a hamster and that's why she came back so early. Poor aunty

[@stefanoraz27]

this feels like a mythology thing "woman turns into jaguar to punish her husband that hates kids"

[@mellow_mallow]

This would make a sick folk tale

[@CalvinKalisto]

Honestly that would fit with a mythology story.

[@rushilgorripati]

More like Dhar man video

[@tellmewill]

@@rushilgorripati what Dhar Mann videos are you watching

[@rushilgorripati]

@@tellmewill Husband hates kids and regrets it

[@ratlily21]

As a woman, I can say I would also definitely fake my death and turn into a magical jaguar for 11 years because my husband said "I hate children" to me in the middle of a magic show performance, instead of talking it over with him reasonably. Very realistic. 10/10

[@mimisezlol]

Yknow, me too. Hmm. 📻🔊 "From the makers of girl math and girl dinner comes girl avoidance! Avoid any kind of confrontation by turning into a magical jaguar because that's your coping strategy."

[@raimarulightning]

I honestly think there must have been a deleted scene where he and his wife are talking to each other during the performance and she mentions wanting a child. It's the only thing that makes sense to me

[@nero1798]

I mean he probably didn't just said that to her out of nowhere and she probably asked him during the performance what isn't a good time to make family plans. Also if someone really wants to have children but their partner doesn't want to have children don't force them, because they would just end up treating the children bad because they never wanted to have children. Just look for a partner that actuallay wants to start a family.

[@aarishowton8037]

@@nero1798 she didn’t force him, didn’t you watch the movie She just turned into a jaguar 👌🏼

[@cheri618]

him: i hate children her: 🐆 CONSEQUENCES

[@Jiyu_Starfam]

😂🤣

[@jumpyjumpjumpjumps2369]

Wait he said “I hate children”? I thought he said “i ate children”

[@prig1557]

@@jumpyjumpjumpjumps2369 ...what?

[@jumpyjumpjumpjumps2369]

@@prig1557 i thought he said "I ate children"

[@prig1557]

@@jumpyjumpjumpjumps2369 No I know, but just like...you know what nvm.

[@Tstarbuck]

“Oh no the panthers tail is gently placed between the couch cushions we need to help it” (Proceeds to jump on the couch)

[@shelby2901]

sitting down and having a long talk with your husband about the possibility of having kids in the future < turning into a jaguar until he changes his mind

[@ShiruKitty]

@@Nickynick0810 I BEEN DOING THAT!! Good money.

[@fluffybunchy]

Blue haired Dahyun is life kzbin.info/www/bejne/eX6XdJ6Me9KHmtU

[@fluffybunchy]

@@Nickynick0810 pls don't click or tap the link

[@nerdorama009]

This is what we in the married couple business call a power move.

[@Purplesquigglystripe]

Babe, can you just stop being a jaguar so we can talk about this?

[@theskyisfallingohno3950]

I was legit thinking that the mysterious woman hiring the teenagers to steal was gonna be the wife the whole time

[@murrmurr2705]

That would have been so good tho! Wasted potential.......

[@Thelittlecartman-o6n]

I love this so much thank you

[@srishtihota7020]

SAME

[@imperialguard451]

zamboni: *traumatizing maxs friends* max: “are you my new dad?”

[@broadex9080]

Ahh reminds me of a shitty dad and shitty family, I hate my life.

[@maddiedoes3571]

Kinda makes you wonder about his bio dad

[@JoshuaDuncan-o1u]

Max's friends: *are fearing for their lives* Max: 🎶you're my daddd, you're my dad! Boogie woogie woogie🎶

[@kennyyy9633]

Zamboni: low key traumatizes children and is accused of blowing up his wife Max: You are my da~ad, you’re my dad! Boogie woogie woogie

[@josofina]

you good

[@shalev.]

I wheezed at this

[@well1w0nder]

Ha I love that vine

[@well1w0nder]

hi my names CATRINA • you should be

[@lucerix6033]

max: daddy? zamboni: dO I LOOK-

[@stylussticc4306]

I like how he calls it a jaguar, but then thought it might be a panther, then just settled on jungle cat.

[@shadowcultist]

especially because jaguars and panthers are the same thing lol

[@Undivided-X]

@@shadowcultist not Florida panthers (pumas) or old world panthers (leopards) though

[@thatonegooze]

@@Undivided-X neither are Carolina Panthers (football team)

[@imkelsey.givememoney.]

Lmao I love how everyone is arguing about Jaguars and panthers 😂

[@Birlicy]

He just got less and less descriptive

[@ShadowRulah]

I could not stop laughing at the fact that those bullies opened the pumpkin expecting to see a child's mutilated corpse.

[@chikwik7033]

audience: “this man killed his wife” zambony: “i loved my wife” audience: “ok he’s innocent” zambony: “....but i hate children” *law and order theme intensifies*

[@fishinglegit6785]

but he loves children *dunn* *dunn*

[@estherdetweiler6903]

This gives off tumblr post energy and I love it

[@chebic5095]

THIS SAYS A LOT ABOUT SOCIETY

[@1nf1ict48]

bro i wanna like but its at 911 likes and that fits so perfectly with the comment

[@Brams2777]

@@chebic5095 We LiVe iN a SoCiEtY

[@hi-uv5mp]

Please make a "I hate children" song with a "can't believe this nononono" chorus

[@izzyy5624]

If it happens, remember you spoke this into creation 😳

[@alicenthightowerschair]

111th like

[@madisonrose1893]

hell yeah danny please do this

[@jildavison]

when the "cant believe this nonono part happened" i thought he was gonna end the video with a song with that in it

[@mystxixs1258]

Bro I HATE THIS MOVIE it SCARES ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@mariafausti3128]

Max: *almost gets killed in zamboni’s house* Also max: *_its free real estate_*

[@humanperson8903]

I was expecting an actual reply

[@sighofdismae]

lmao the funniest thing about this comment is the orphan kid's name is Max (dw about mishearing it just genuinely made me laugh aloud for some reason I'm so sorry)

[@mariafausti3128]

@@sighofdismae oh LMAO I’ll change it 😂

[@SunnysFilms]

I actually feel really bad for Zamboni. It's clear from the start that he didn't actually do anything to his wife, but he still gets dragged through hell over her disappearance. Kids messing with his property is obviously so common that he doesn't even react to finding his van torched. Then this group of kids keeps showing up and breaking into his house, basically harassing him. And to top it off, it turns out his wife turned herself into the jaguar because he said he hates kids. (And, yes. I did absolutely see that coming.) Really think about the ramifications of this. She disappeared and willingly let her husband get arrested and tried, let him take care of her like a pet living otherwise miserable and alone, and only decided to return when he had a change of heart and adopted Max, ultimately giving her what she wanted. That is so many levels of toxic and messed up. The bullies may have been the antagonists, but Dawn Star was the villain.

[@maddieb.4282]

Dawn Star also is basically the meaning of Lucifer (morning star). Dawn Star is the devil confirmed???????

[@tr6322]

"i hate children" *becomes a magician, a popular thing children are into*

[@pardonthemusic]

magicians are like the customer service workers of the performing world, so i understand how hed start hating children lmao

[@Rotisserie-chicken]

I bet that’s why he said he hates children lol

[@rktdw]

lol i thought he said "I ate children"

[@rktdw]

@@hirwal01 nobody cares

[@Justtired429]

@@hirwal01 Stop trying to scam people.

[@VikaMakovetski]

Plot Twist: Princess the goat is actually the goat from Goat Story

[@aletheia874]

WHAT A TWIST

[@johnkoeppen5063]

And they said that Endgame was the best crossover

[@allisonpaprocki5090]

Fishy fishy fish makin it stinkeeeee

[@Heyheyhaleyd]

Yess

[@apathysatragedy3114]

Hello, and welcome to the Kurtistown embassy of Greg. It's really good to see you again.

[@ColinMctavish]

"Never been an orphan" is such a hard flex.

[@teresahowick5197]

Right?! 😂

[@iamcool544]

Never clumsy enough to lose both parents

[@yutabbyt]

Pftt-

[@Ran_Exists]

Epik flex

[@Finite_Source]

Imagine being an orphan. Couldn't be me, could not be me.

[@mailman276]

the fact that the guy who plays the great zamboni had previously starred in schindlers list fills me with indescribable emotion

[@redvelvetunderground]

he's also the star of such classics as bloodrayne and the love guru. really exemplifying that knighthood. do u think he made the cast and crew call him "sir" during filming?

[@fredericororiz6500]

AND he was Ghandi!

[@yuki97kira]

Can you describe it?

[@geekgirl_luv4262]

I’m sorry WHAT

[@geekgirl_luv4262]

WHAT

[@wenirlicker6808]

Lesson learned: Don't tell your wife you hate children or she will turn into a jaguar for 11 years

[@ГалинаЛазарева-н2п]

Well metaphorically this happens sometimes:)

[@beccakesss]

My dad told my mom he hates kids and now i have a pet jaguar :)

[@RachaelFenton]

Spoilers

[@aashaykhot7690]

Holy shit I tried it and woke up with a new car in my garage

[@amandathompson6327]

Spoiler alert gd

[@supdograinbarff1460]

Imagine your wife pretending to be dead because you said I hate children.

[@Esmeralda-rd9hf]

#relatable

[@shineinstars]

maybe she wanted children? idk

[@idnfjf282]

Spoiler alert

[@kirane]

666th like lol

[@samsonright936]

@@shineinstars honestly, if my husband was as weird as this guy and all I wanted to have a baby and this weird ass man turns to me and says, “I hate children” I would definitely leave him💀...maybe not that dramatically but still

[@ratqueenbee]

honestly I expected the ending to be something like Dawn Star being pregnant when Zamboni said that he hates kids so she ran away and then it turns out Max was actually their biological child all along

[@sepiasmith5065]

I thought that too. and yet.. here we are

[@reverland735]

Ikr that would’ve been much better

[@erinaa9486]

Me too! She died so Max ended up alone, but at the end he finds his bio father, Zamboni

[@tracimallek722]

This would have been perfect!!!

[@reggieregina1362]

But like wouldn’t that have been worse since she abandoned her child to the streets all because she’s trying to get revenge on her husband for saying he hates children? Because I thought that would be the twist too but then I thought about it and it would be messed up if that was the conclusion.

[@jingles.le.fae333]

Wait so when she turned into a jaguar, Zamboni was like "I guess I have a jaguar now"? Like didn't question where the cat came from or whether or not he was qualified to take care of it, he was just like "hm ok".... what????

[@PurpleMoon799]

my hc is that the jaguar just appeared near his house so he just took her in. but imagine if he didn't 😂

[@raimarulightning]

I imagine a black jaguar makes an awfully convenient pet for a man trying to cultivate an air of dangerous mystery

[@Mario_Angel_Medina]

"What's your plan kid? Do you think if you just wander into my house every day I will adopt you? The jaguar already did that and I don't fall for the same trick twice!" _ the Great Samboni 😂

[@Mario_Angel_Medina]

The trick at the begining wherethe Great Zamboni explodes is supposed to be done with mirrors, right? In the film is obviously done with CGI but the reason why it shaters like that is because he's supposed to be a reflection on a mirror or a projection onto a glass. That would have been the explanation, right?

[@raimarulightning]

@@Mario_Angel_Medina Yup. That's what I was imagining

[@thekneesbee]

The Great Zamboni: there's no such thing as real magic! Also The Great Zamboni: shoots lightning out of his hands and shatters to dust

[@tomlenid699]

Also has a panther wife

[@iguessthisismyusername9313]

I thought he said "I eat children" Instead of "I hate children" Lets just say I was concerned.

[@meghnalekshman4137]

That sounds like a more interesting movie

[@emamacitas]

He be like:I am CANIBALLLLLLL

[@pretty948]

Hold on , y'all don't eat children ?

[@doubtful_seer]

@@pretty948 damn, I’ve really been doing my whole diet wrong too

[@mostlyzaye]

SAMEEEEEE 🤣🤣🤣

[@solemnander]

Max is the best part about this movie. He’s so unnecessarily depressed, like they have no reason to have him in the movie lol

[@MoonchildDontCry]

I think that's someone else who's life is extremely miserable (same) venting in the script

[@frostyskeletons8950]

@@MoonchildDontCry I ghost wrote the script

[@spacebug5686]

"Theres nothing worth living for"

[@poemsbypoetry]

@@spacebug5686 - Says the 8 year old, tiny child

[@alidragon7034]

I feel personally attacked by this comment

[@hihi-pj1yz]

that awkward moment when you hear your husband say he doesn't like kids so you frame him for murder

[@HopeIsADrug11037]

"I have nothing to live for anyway" Somebody get this kid a therapist 😭

[@elliehansen1345]

He's being mischief and trespasser

[@TheWelchProductions]

@@venusgxcha FBI OPEN UP!!

[@TheWelchProductions]

He’s not a monster. He’s just ahead of the curve.

[@fedcab4360]

@@venusgxcha still fucking creepy

[@Illlium]

Max keeping it one hundred

[@daromal]

Bae says he hates children. [Slap him again] [DIVORCE] [Turn into a jungle cat]

[@Henrychampagne1021]

Lmao

[@AloysiusWaffle]

I choose D, explode and live as jungle cat without him because clearly I’m an alien

[@lumerkun4122]

I'm your 667 like. *Ur welcome*.

[@bungiecrimes7247]

Again? Aw hell nah we throwing hands!

[@whoishunterb]

[Give him a good RIGHT CROSS]

[@graceholland5770]

When you said there was a plot twist, my mind instantly switched to 'detect kids movie plot twist' mode and determined quickly that the woman who employs the bullies was the wife, just dressed different, cause that's the kind of normal plot twists in a kids movie you would see. I was wrong.

[@MephistoFowl]

me too

[@shrekshrek4755]

i came to the same (wrong) conclusion lmao

[@annie-yq5wc]

same, then i thought ‘oh he said something about the jaguar, oh god is it gonna come out and kill the kid??? wtf!!!’ and,,, nope

[@yararinamiil]

I thought that too, maybe because she's basically the only woman that's somewhat relevant to the plot throughout the movie

[@ellanisr4874]

I was expecting the evil lady to be the magician dude 😂

[@Jaz-bb2sl]

'Never let them know your next move' really applies to this movie

[@brotherhogan6880]

I remember I saw a behind the scenes of this movie, they where talking about the ending off the movie and how it was only the producer and director who knew about it so they shot all the magic scenes (beginning and ending parts) in one day, and when the movie came out Ben Kingsley walked out of the screening and scalded the director apparently saying “what the fuck was that” and “your insane”, what a rollercoaster of emotions that must of been for everyone lmao.

[@madisonf.8555]

😂Holy crap I love that

[@MadeOfConfusion]

That's the only way I can imagine Ben Kingsley being in something this terrible 🤣

[@Elizabean1984]

@@MadeOfConfusion Bro this movie is great.

[@devin_so_devious]

How can that be true when Ben Kingsley shot the scene of shadow going in the rocket, then dawn star coming out. He'd have to know the twist to film that whole rocket scene

[@carmenmercedes9903]

@@devin_so_devious yea...

[@tinydustmite]

Zamboni: I hate children Dawn Star: so you have chosen ✨abandonment✨

[@Igorilla_monkey]

The Great Zamboni: *Takes off mustache* Also The Great Zamboni: *Turns into Severus Snape*

[@cigarette_ahegao]

Yes

[@discoshark7767]

That’s exactly what I thought 😂

[@tunafish5462]

He also looks like Neil Breen with long hair and a British accent lol

[@ATLAS_SANDS]

ROHAN YAAAS

[@mr.oopsiedoopsie]

I _ I

[@SponsoredByAnxiety]

I didn’t predict it until you said “but the jaguar hasn’t come out yet” and I was like “wait… it’s gonna be the wife, isn’t it”

[@ChengTeoh]

Who else thought that when he said "walking down the street eleven and a half years later with a jaguar", that the jaguar would be a car and not an actual jungle cat?

[@spiral1510]

Yooo I'm acc surprised no one knew u

[@nervousdorito3696]

Naw my first thought is always jungle cat which would normally get me in trouble but this time it checked out 👌

[@ritz3686]

Yesss me too. I assumed that by Jaguar, he meant the car.

[@arcadeii]

Ok unrelated but why the heck did I see your profile picture as chat blanc. Then realize it wasn’t. Then thought it was again. I think I’m too obsessed with this show

[@HAARGLaga]

me

[@Subnootical8497]

Zamboni: I hate children. Dawn Star, getting ready to blow up and act like she don't know nobody:

[@gravelordnito6950]

Well, if that’s her mango…

[@gayjayy]

*shark laughing noises*

[@JoshuaDuncan-o1u]

**turns into kazuichi soada from danganrompa 2: goodbye despair**

[@CG-lf8st]

Imagine writing a female character who was so 2D she literally turns herself into a jaguar for 11 years because her husband wont have kids with her

[@nobodysXghost]

I don't mind it though, dawn star was in control of the entire plot and was the most powerful one. Regardless, no lines.

[@amazinglyamara7850]

U SPOILED ITTTT

[@CG-lf8st]

@almostamara HOW WAS I MEANT TO KNOW THIS COMMENT WOULD BLOW UP😂

[@bigmiscoolerbtw-4214]

Maybe......?..

[@bethanymichaella]

Lesson learned: don’t scroll through comments at the start of the video as to not spoil the whole video

[@carantanian127]

22:23 she legally became a pumpkin

[@RetroAnts]

Markas pumpkin

[@makenzimills2858]

Why is he named after a machine that cleans ice rinks. I can’t get over it

[@milqvetoast]

who? *confused in floridian*

[@makenzimills2858]

@@milqvetoast hahah they’re called zambonis

[@jakek1735]

@@milqvetoast Lol nobody watches hockey in Florida? Like, not even on TV?

[@emmmahezw]

I clean the floor of the grocery store that I work at with a zamboni

[@makenzimills2858]

@@emmmahezw I’m jealous that sounds fun

[@laurenl5585]

danny: theres weird sound effects through the whole movie and ill point them out also danny: never mentions it again

[@MouseSkull]

He points them out ONCE, with the cuckoo clock.

[@madameproblemes6548]

I have the same messiness in my vids haha let's say it adds a charm

[@Facemakerstudios]

I’d say that the “can’t believe this no no no” moment counts as a weird sound effect

[@MouseSkull]

@Meron Gebeyehu 11:04

[@MouseSkull]

@Meron Gebeyehu Oh, okay then.

[@melpet9]

Wife: *blows up* 11 years later Man: *walks around with murder animal after murdering wife*

[@littlewhitewulf]

Carol Baskin WHO

[@kate434]

*with a peppy theme song*

[@keeghan6480]

Murder animal IS wife

[@melpet9]

@@keeghan6480 insane theory

[@carinacangialosi4752]

THATS MY BEST FRIEND

[@moissery]

I've watched this video so many times, it's one of my favorites. But I only just now put the subtitles and realized Zamboni says "what I said that night was the cruelest thing..". I always heard "the coolest thing", like he was proud of just randomly saying "i hate children", and that was just hilarious to me. So needless to say I won't be watching this video with the subtitles on again

[@dopeynhappy]

Lmao

[@lorenza_0057]

Idk man, saying "I hate children" before unrelated actions is pretty normal, I myself do so at least once every two days

[@cheesekir9470]

As do i good sir

[@theperson8049]

It's honestly kinda weird cause I do that too, and thought no one else did lmao

[@raimarulightning]

I said it while typing this comment

[@carlyjayne9186]

Danny’s set up has changed. We are now Greg again, officially.

[@nonyab5640]

He made a video about it on his 2nd channel if you wanna watch.

[@carlyjayne9186]

@@nonyab5640 I’m truly Greg, so ofc I watched it already ahahah. Thanks though. 🥰

[@julietsanchez7693]

We finally aren’t Geg anymore!

[@tommyholm1993]

@@nonyab5640 2nd channel? Where he gets a little sillier and whackier?

[@echo_felix331]

depending on where his chair is, sometimes we’re ‘REG’

[@nicomoru1660]

Dawn Star really stayed a panther even when her husband was put on trial for her murder

[@KateBurnham]

what a power move

[@dddlegend8102]

That's just Cold

[@cherrybomb8120]

Two types of people

[@trshhd]

dawn star walked so amy dunne could run

[@jesssoucy4976]

It would be hard to forgive that one if it were me

[@abigailg6586]

If I had a nickle for every time Danny made a video about a movie where a middle-aged man suffers a great loss and goes on a journey of healing that ends with him adopting an orphan I'd have two nickles... which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened twice

[@PurpleMoon799]

what's the second one

[@abigailg6586]

@@PurpleMoon799 the lamp movie

[@usernameremoved3512]

Dude that “I’ve never been a orphan before so..fuck yeah” made me like the video lmao

[@ulti8g827]

Your comment is infested by bots.

[@ashtheskelton1901]

Sorry dude looks like the bots got into your comment :(

[@visib_uncomfy]

well thank god I saw this first before the bot

[@broadex9080]

The second worst thing to happen to those orphans.

[@BelowAverageGaming13]

Each like is another orphan with nothing to live for.

[@theworldbreaker]

Random kid in movie: cAN't bEliEVe tHIs NONONO... Me: *intense "Help let me go" flashbacks

[@avocado8137]

Omg same

[@well1w0nder]

Help let me go help let me go help let me go stop kidnapping me she was just a lady not a care in the world till she saw some grown men kidnapping a girl and she said help let me go help let me go help let me go stop kidnapping me

[@well1w0nder]

Augustuz Dyke hah

[@well1w0nder]

Augustuz Dyke I love dark humour

[@gennasantaquilani4863]

6 year old kid- "I have nothing to live for." Jesus Christ. He sounds like someone in a midlife crisis. Lol

[@sonarchy5158]

Maybe it was a midlife crisis

[@mocotojam6767]

@@sonarchy5158 the movie also cut out the part where Max comes out anti Vax

[@jexxer]

He sounds like a normal millennial to me.

[@sixndr8376]

wait, thinking you have nothing to live for is the MIDLIFE crisis?

[@kurlozmakara4194]

my brother talks like that 😂 I tell him we ran out of tomato sauce n he'll tell me his life not worth living like calm down shakespeare

[@ChaotixIntrovert]

This is a movie that you’d watch in 2nd grade because you payed $5 for the pizza party.

[@triplesbians]

i feel like i need to become a 2nd grade teacher and let those future students watch this movie now

[@raimarulightning]

And fall in love with it forever

[@sylphoia]

Honestly, I think his wife was turned into a jaguar by the "evil spirits" he claims are after her in the first scene. (Probably because he said he didn't like children?) This makes the ending make...a little more sense, I guess? It does explain why she took so long to become human again, the "evil spirits" had to wait until Mr. Zamboni liked children. This movie is so fucking weird

[@User_Here414]

I like that idea I like your little theory that you made

[@angieroman6723]

That's what I figured Its like a big long lesson, And afterward her "collar" went back to the gods that commanded such shenanigans.

[@noelani4101]

As an indigenous woman, I can confirm that evil spirits turn us into jaguars all the time. I've been waiting to turn back into a human for years.

[@cs7811]

@Angie Roman or its just bdsm

[@jett2451]

But that’s just a theory

[@MissySobriety]

The kid who played Max is now an assistant professor at Princeton and I for one am very proud of him.

[@teresahowick5197]

For real? That’s cool.

[@shelbyg.8553]

I don't think it's the same guy the picture doesn't look like him

[@MissySobriety]

@@shelbyg.8553 Well it's hard to find anything that confirms it 100% the child actor dropped off the map in 2006 (when he was 15-16) assistant professor weinberg started post secondary education in 2008 (when child actor would have been 17-18) the timeline matches. Also there are a ridiculous amount of people named Matt Weinberg out there, however Princeton Weinberg comes up related to child actor Weinberg. So I'm convinced but you are entitled to disagree.

[@vilya9296]

@@MissySobriety This guy did a whole ass FBI investigation

[@hobyt3]

It checks out, thank you for a fun fact

[@vincentjonesvr]

I feel like the kid is WAY creepier than Zamboni. Zamboni is just like "This kid keeps making all these very obvious appeals to try to live with me. Fucking weirdo is going to stab me in my sleep."

[@terra_the_nightingale135]

Plus the "i've got nothing to live for anyways" makes it seem that this kid will kill since he has nothing to lose XD

[@kiralonely]

Honestly. The dude is more relatable, the kid's forcing it on him, lol. The side look he gave the mirror in the scene in the starry room made me snort tbh cause same dude, wtf, why are you bringing that shit up out of nowhere, jesus-

[@jaymodmlg2837]

@@terra_the_nightingale135 iiiii

[@jaymodmlg2837]

@@terra_the_nightingale135 is

[@jaymodmlg2837]

@@terra_the_nightingale135 imjji

[@SunWukongTheMonkeyKing]

The most unrealistic thing is that Zamboni just watches the kids get scared. I might just be weird, but I'd be laughing like a maniac if that happened to me.

[@stargurl__211]

i don't know if it's physically possible for anyone to keep a straight face while watching a girl flail around whilst being stuck in a pumpkin. zamboni has skills i guess

[@Shrupx7]

Lmao frrr💀🤣

[@leilahogan2007]

The great zamboni: I hate children Dawn star has left the chat

[@kheuzi6558]

Jaguar has entered the chat

[@realxjosh8298]

Max has entered the chat

[@mrpocketminer428]

among us piano... kzbin.info/www/bejne/oJa5an2Ih92fpac (i am not the creator, you don't have to watch it, dont give owner hate) 🤍

[@jyotsna3617]

Logic has left the chat

[@justaperson5677]

That awkward moment when you're a magician and your furry wife turns into a jaguar and frames you for murder for 11 1/2 years because you don't like children 😳

[@DeathnoteBB]

Because we’re Delta airlines, and life is a fucking nightmare~

[@justaperson5677]

@@DeathnoteBB YEEESSSS!! Thank you for that reference 😂

[@justaperson5677]

@@DeathnoteBB Also, love the username

[@DeathnoteBB]

@@justaperson5677 No problem!! As soon as I read “frames you for murder” John Mulaney popped into my head Also thanks!

[@thefiretruck9604]

@@DeathnoteBB oOOHKAAAAYYY 😀

[@sarasthoughts]

"I DIDN'T KILL MY WIFE." " *~~ooooh... I bet he DID kill his wife* "

[@Flabbergasted-yl4hv]

I did not hit her i did NAWT

[@dylansickinger545]

Hahaha look at that high waisted man, he got feminine hips! NO THATS THE THING IM SENSITIVE ABOUT.

[@elliegd]

oooooo, who’s that fella

[@Laylasjustagirl]

He did Nawt

[@karkatpark1328]

OMGOMGOMG Y E S

[@aliennyx6191]

Wait does nobody else have a room specifically made to hypnotize people? 😂😅

[@dopeynhappy]

I know right? Imagine not having a hypnotism room? Can't relate

[@yuki97kira]

No but i have my personal disco where the walls and floor moves and spins

[@tapirsareunder-appreciated2272]

Gotta admit, I thought the twist would be that the Great Zamboni was the orphan's dad. Dawn Star was secretly pregnant and planning to tell him after the show, he said "I hate children" in response to rowdy kids in the crowd, she freaked and ran away, had a kid in secret, died of Plot Convenient Disease® /Horrific Accident™ which left him an orphan, and now they can be a family or whatever. Jaguar Wife was a way more insane twist, imo. He looks younger, but I've met a few 10-year-olds his size.

[@annettesheets6574]

Me, too!

[@blameitonmillie5506]

Well...the kid is fully white

[@darkdragon4075]

Is no-one gonna talk about how these high schoolers are messing with like 3rd graders?

[@cindyespindola4946]

I was thinking the same thing 😅

[@oriaaane]

I'm trying to figure out if the bully girl has the weirdest stomach tattoo ever or a strange mole

[@maraflowerinclubpenguin]

@@oriaaane they really tried to make her look cool with a semi crop top

[@toxion2391]

kinder kids

[@DreamInPlaid]

"Does anyone get this vine reference?" he asks as if we haven't been subsisting on RIP vine compilations for years.

[@sweetpencil3367]

For real

[@serpentjade_]

Literally

[@millyc.7925]

Gaming_Master - no u >:(

[@joshuamckay3309]

I thought for sure Dawnstar left because she was pregnant and when Zamboni said he hated children she ran because she didn't want him to know. I thought the twist was she comes back and tells Zamboni the kid he adopted was his son, she gave him up to avoid being a single mom but now they can be a happy family. Didn't anticipate "Panther!"

[@ace3275]

Ben Kingsley- 4 time academy award nominee, in freaking ‘Schindler’s List’. Ben Kingsley - also the damn Great Zamboni.

[@EjvindGEMDark]

This comment is questioning why he isn't a 4 time nominee and 1 time winner for his role as the Great Zamboni... right?

[@Purpelspy]

i wonder if these people do whatever because they don’t get good roles anymore.

[@r.p.4756]

@@barringa7 or because they want money.

[@CityQueenChili]

THANK YOU! Why is everyone not addressing this?!

[@whtenoize2847]

@Random User doubt it. i work in film and ive never seen any member of staff be it crew or actors have a binding contract that forces them to work for the studio for a prolonged time. it is possible for higher up crew like production but its way more common to have a project by project contract system. 99% sure he just applied for the role or got offered the role and accepted

[@bbgaming5079]

if this movie was a john mulaney quote: “I LOVE MY WIFE. I DID NOT KILL MY WIFE”

[@yuki97kira]

Or to quote "the room": I did nawt, I did nawt hit her

[@pauladt]

@@yuki97kira oh hi mark

[@bilbo2k45]

I mean they are almost the same person, they both look like extremely tall children.

[@ameremortal5267]

Shit I bet he did kill his wife

[@epicremarc]

Ooh look at that guy. I bet he DID kill his wife

[@goulashb4553]

Max is like a 6 year old child, and he really talking about how he has nothing to live for. smh

[@EjvindGEMDark]

He had that 2020 mood in 2002.

[@leenkhalid6427]

most gen z thing ive ever heard

[@RiyaWaghela-xn1ud]

he is the future hardin

[@pretty948]

I'm pretty sure max is Noah centineo

[@ghosty4735]

He was just stating the facts

[@stebec]

someone give whoever performed the "spooky kind of guy" song a massive raise. shit slaps.

[@emmasanford9931]

Kurtis: *Makin’ it stinky* Danny: *Great right cross*

[@matilda5753]

you could make a religion out of thi- no don't

[@Bathykolpian_goddess]

@@mrpocketminer428 could you not self promo

[@crazystranger8810]

@@matilda5753 I get the reference hahahahaha

[@mheeemheee.5230]

*DRUNK:D* *kzbin.info/www/bejne/o2q1lWhjja6nldU*

[@owenmintz250]

6IXE 9INE DIED IN A CAR CRASH GO SEE THE VIDEO: kzbin.info/www/bejne/hYXClmiXlsSHec0

[@ScoutingTheHorizon]

You should do 'A Mermaid For Christmas' for the holiday season.

[@3734suneater]

That will be fun

[@imdisappointedinyouson1487]

you aren't real

[@3734suneater]

@@imdisappointedinyouson1487 who are you

[@imdisappointedinyouson1487]

dad

[@pip3827]

@@imdisappointedinyouson1487 lol

[@Esfirocapto]

I could absolutely NOT stop laughing for a single moment during this video. Bless you, Drew.

[@fluffybunchy]

Thought this was gonna be a nice wholesome comment. I guess life is just unfair

[@nekocat4293]

@@fluffybunchy i don't see a problem with the comment tbh

[@ChanceKearns]

He didnt even sneeze

[@ToyedTaiyaki]

@@fluffybunchy I don't understand, it is wholesome!

[@siloedspace]

Yeah but he didn’t wear the beard he promised, also can’t believe how drew looked with that fake beard, looks kinda like fox szn when it’s on

[@jeremiahdaniels8974]

Honestly, the craziest part of this movie was the magic collar at the end rewriting history and materializing stars for a new constellation.

[@sangwoosashes5756]

I absolutely lost it when he said “I have nothing to live for anyway” BYE- 💀

[@Octoweaponry]

I feel like hes gonna turn into JD when hes older 😭😭

[@kyn182]

@@Octoweaponry oml i hope not 😂

[@ThemanthelegendKenny]

Unrelated but YOUR USERMAME TEGTVRTG

[@degenerat9329]

He's only, like, 5 and he's already having a midlife crisis

[@garythegoblin6177]

Hell yeah

[@Haihoney]

The fact that Danny put himself on the stand giving the verdict instead of with the jury, okay mr.legalman

[@erinanderson357]

That’s why happens when you get slapped by legal

[@sweethater8558]

He also seems to think that Zamboni was found not guilty, despite reading aloud that it was a hung jury.

[@EjvindGEMDark]

@@sweethater8558 That's country dependent. A hung jury in the US leads to a mistrial, in England I believe a retrial (although we don't need unanimous anyway) and in Scotland an acquittal (though their system has a simple majority rule).

[@morganmarsh1276]

@@EjvindGEMDark look at mr legalman over here. you gonna slap me or sum?

[@EjvindGEMDark]

@@morganmarsh1276 Square up fam

[@clownfromclowntown]

I can summarize the entire reason for the ending; *in the writing room* “Alright boys, just one more scene left, this is where Max gets adopted!” “What about Dawn Star’s plot line?” “𝙎𝙃𝙄𝙏”

[@mariafausti3128]

HAHA

[@greynotgray6808]

If he's being blamed for potentially murdering his wife and then years later is walking around with a jaguar on a chain, I'd say he prolly did it. Lol

[@raimarulightning]

I think the jaguar is probably an affectation to scare people away. I can't imagine I'd want to be very social in his situation.

[@lography6917]

That kid's about as subtle trying to move into Zamboni's house as my gf is when she's like "Hmm wish I had a glass of water"

[@randomstranger7845]

lmaooo

[@mrpocketminer428]

among us piano... kzbin.info/www/bejne/oJa5an2Ih92fpac (i am not the creator, you don't have to watch it, dont give owner hate) 🤍

[@-Ghostess]

"I don't know how the goat could possibly be up there, but it is somehow." This is goat ownership in a nutshell. It's what they do.

[@endTHEhegemony_Today]

This is the one true and logical plot hole in Danny's analysis!

[@maxventunosei5017]

Reading the comment just as he said it haha

[@bongoforpope]

Only goat owners can relate💯

[@HornyIndianMan]

Goated comment. Real goat farmer hours.

[@GraceSavidesKeller]

That's so funny.

[@jennalee2020]

I like how Zambony kind of looks like a cheap Severus Snape...

[@ellastewart7193]

thats literally exactly what i was thinking too😂😂 and they both even hate children

[@tryingmouse]

IKR?!?!

[@lex.is.ordinary]

Nah he looks like the Walmart version or Inigo Montoya from Princess Bride

[@ellastewart7193]

@@lex.is.ordinary HA

[@maralinaprinceton2972]

After faking his death Snape ain't doing so good...

[@katjosephperez8772]

Nothing is more eclectic than Sir Ben Kingsley’s acting career. He was in “Gandhi” playing GANDHI. Schindler’s List, Robot Overlords, Night at the Museum, Moses, Species, Boxtrolls, Ender’s Game

[@StevenMcSteve]

I'm surprised he wasn't arrested again under suspicion of having his wife locked up somewhere for 11 years or something

[@static8149]

Spoilers dude

[@PassTheMarmalade1957]

Or that she wasn't arrested for perverting the course of justice. Her husband was charged with her murder, while she was apparently willingly vanished and watching the whole thing.

[@boopsdoops]

Technically, can't do that. Legally, you can't be tried for a crime more than once, so he'd have to do sumt else to get tried all over again.

[@rosiegaymer]

@@boopsdoops but that is a different crime tho? kidnapping and murder are very different

[@boopsdoops]

@@rosiegaymer eh, ultimately stemmed from one moment, i'm fairly certain it would be seen as more or less the same crime.

[@ana-cr2tg]

Random charachter: Hey you wanna go to- The kid: I CAN'T I'M AN ORPHAN Holy shit that kid's depressed

[@regina-kc6rf]

Harry Potter be like:

[@lazycaterpillar1923]

Goob from Meet the Robinsons

[@regina-kc6rf]

Dick Grayson:

[@melpomenethemuse]

A series of unfortunate events:

[@alexkuculyn6417]

Yo, when your vibing trying to catch your goat and the orphan starts talking about suicide, 8:50

[@starfiresreign]

😂what a mood killer

[@Olivia-zd7dc]

Hate it when that happens

[@bread6052]

Yeah but I had a solution and it’s just to do it for him

[@gussjohnson1613]

Youll get more likes if you edit it to say you're...

[@menyougacha]

#relatable

[@stilelits]

15:45 love the slow push with the camera to increase the tension on the bandaid scene