Take These Steps to Evaluate Unhealthy Things in Your Life

[@bethtaylor9773]

I ask God for discernment and wisdom a lot!

[@cherylallis2458]

Sometimes the abusive person is very friendly and charismatic in public and can fool almost everyone about who they really are.

[@Lebensbaustein]

Yeah that story made Cloud sound pretty unprofessional

[@pisicacutecat4869]

Sadly, this is how my dad was with my mom. 😢

[@phoenixrising33]

That's a covert narcissist.

[@DG-jv6ok]

Not sometimes...ALWAYS. Been there!

[@denniskramer5238]

Denying their own power and projecting it onto others is so well said! 19:42

[@ThePossumone]

As long as we are aware God gave us feelings for a reason and purpose / and not to deny reality and constantly think it’s YOU SOMETIMES it is them ! And God also gave us intuition to keep us safe DONT ignore your feelings

[@shoshanas5251]

1. You may be disowning your own strengths . Diminishing yourself, negating your thoughts/ opinions. Log = distortion 2. OLD Woundedness 3. In denial, not looking at your own issues. - Get log out of your own eye first... Doesn’t mean that you ‘do not evaluate people or not confront people and real problems’. Thanks, Dr. Cloud you are a blessing and true GEM!

[@juliekong5013]

Regarding whether what I feel is reality - I hands down accept the point here that humans can readily be off in their perceptions, but there's another side to this coin. I tried to tell a counselor how I was being severely harmed in a relationship (not physical harm). The counselor validated my feelings somewhat but then claimed that my feelings were not based on reality. So basically, she didn't believe me about the reality of the harm that was being done to me. It was absolutely real harm - it was *not* a matter of my perceptions being off. Insisting that someone's perceptions are off when they're not is gaslighting. *This is a severe problem in the counseling realm, when a counselor is not trained to discern, say, manipulative dynamics in a relationship and concludes that it's a problem of perception.*

[@life_with_yolanda]

I'm sorry you experienced that, it was not fair. Not everyone is skilled in their respective professions and that's a reality. In my understanding counselors are supposed to help you identify your own problems. They only know what you tell them and sometimes they might misunderstand. They are humans too. They not the only single source of truth, comfort and healing. Always try other means. Then if different sources of truth conclude the same thing, you can make a good judgement for yourself too.

[@bumblinagirl2683]

That sounds hard- not being seen and made to feel understood. Not all counselors are knowledgeable with tactics related to covert behaviors those close to us can use to hurt us. I hope you can get connected with the support that can help you make changes to better your life🤍

[@lauramosca-calisti8295]

I get that from speaking to counselors as well. Feeling so dismissive by them. Obviously not educated enough in narcissism abuse at all. Just because you are not black n blue on the outside doesn’t mean it’s not on the inside.

[@TruthAHPrY-A]

I'm sorry you went through this. I went through it with my 28-year husband & one counselor who was not wise & fell for his charms & intelligence. I had to stop going to her because she took an already abusive man & added gas to his angry fire. But thankfully, my next 2 counselors saw the truth. My husband stubbornly refused any & all counseling & advice that questioned him, even from his own adult sons. Now we are unfortunately divorcing. Something I never wanted for my life.

[@juliekong5013]

@@TruthAHPrY-A Yes. It's so awful. I'm sorry

[@lauramosca-calisti8295]

Living with husband for 35 years who constantly verbal n emotionally drains my self worth for so many years, I am exhausted, alone, with his screaming anger rages I cannot deal with. I just can’t handle it anymore, my health worsening, physical pain…neglecting my needs, a charmer to others, lies to family about me and so much more. How do I get my life back now??

[@katyjenkins236]

Get away for a few months and while away seek a trauma counselor. Your brain needs to heal. Praying for you!

[@rickhall7156]

Unfortunately, it sounds as if you may be married to a narcissist. You definitely need to get help & get out of the situation. Check out Dr. David E. Clarke, a Christian psychologist who has dealt extensively with those who have been trapped in a narcissistic relationship. You can find his videos on KZbin!

[@nancycook4405]

I am always blessed by what you share Dr cloud I am 68 years old and I was married at 16 years old became a Christian with my husband and I at 17 and that's where God started the journey for me and I am so grateful. Although the marriage of 20 years going to Bible College and then getting into the ministry he was a pastor ended with alcoholism and dysfunction that we both were raised with however I have been so grateful for your books and now the podcasts that continue to help me get healthier as a result of my background and woundedness

[@stanandmaribelrivera5572]

Thank you Dr Cloud!! God-bless ✝️

[@coletteplatts7502]

Always questions our perceptions !! The battle is in our minds External reality Heal our old wounds first -resolve it It's ALWAYS UP TO YOU get healthy-- your worth it

[@joannquaid6037]

Something we all need. Is so easy to see other people's faults and sins and not recognize we have a beam in our own eyes.

[@cbak1819]

Born again believer here.. I Jesus Christ.. I think all of us are like this to some degree. Thanks for the scripture.

[@estherann7407]

Great, I love it! It's so good to put common sense tools in our pockets. Thank you Dr. Cloud Fido slept through the entire message...what a good boy!

[@SuperFacecloth]

The only way to take the log out of your own eye is through relationship with Jesus Christ through the Holy Spirit. That is the foundation of the scripture. That is the only way to have a healthy vision. If the eye is clean then the whole body is clean. We have no righteousness of our own.

[@juliekin4398]

Thank you. This great information. Much appreciated!!

[@Julesyoutoo]

You're awesome, Dr Cloud. Thank you so much.

[@donnaambrose1234]

Thank you, Dr. Cloud. So good!!!

[@Rob9mm]

Very good. Based on the unchanging Word rather than contemporary insanity.

[@marijketimmermans3913]

This is true but also dangerous without our Father. I had an abusievelijk fiance who was cheating, lying, he was a fraud, a thief,... and my guy knew it, but he told me it was my past, I saw him wrong because of the abuse in my past. Sometimes people want to let you think it is you, but it is not. Always with the wisdom of God.

[@triciahallknaut6932]

You always talk about what I need to hear Dr. Cloud. I appreciate you. I know when I speak in obedience, I have usually get hurt by many people. I think the Lord wants me to speak up to some problems with some people & I am not sure if I feel disrespected or that others are disrespectful. And I feel like the Lord wants me to address the specks since many are telling me about my speck. that is why I am having a hard time. No matter what I say, it is scary because most people have reacted when I have said something. But I am sure the Lord wants me to speak up about what is wrong. Thank you for your teaching. I am not judging, but making aware of how we all are so absorbed with ourselves, myself included that we need to wake up & help those who are less fortunate. I think I am sensing the criticism of others to me that hurts, the disrespect when I try to respect, and I think most of us are hypocrites in criticizing another, but are blind to our own stuff. And even though it nay be a projection of the other onto me, it is hurtful that when I say something, & I hurt wanting to stay away from them. So good reminder that I just need to do what the Lord is telling me! you are amazing. Maybe I can write that tomorrow. bless you.

[@camillenashtv]

Live everything this man teaches!❤ #Wow

[@moraleslauralucia]

Omg how do you know have billions of subscribers 🎉 this may be the best advice

[@jearodz]

thank you so much for all your videos

[@BlessedForever888]

So insightful! Thank you!

[@matthewnorris203]

Yeah, I deal with this. Especially with five people. I tend to feel anxious and insecure around them. I don’t think they like me and actually sings. They probably have something against me.

[@Denise-lk8vw]

I agree that people are walking around with woundedess, however excusing the critical, cruel treatment from leadership is not beneficial to organizations.

[@bethtaylor9773]

Yes, feelings are real, but they're not necessarily facts. I appreciate the background on the relative truth business that some have taken to an unrealistic extreme instead of as a tool to validate emotion.

[@freetobememe4358]

Love it, get the log out. Awesome.

[@denniskramer5238]

I think I understand what you’re saying. While the Bible says “all”have sinned and come short of the Glory of God. Hence was the reason for the city of refuge for overcoming the death penalty for a accidental death etc… different specific punishment in comparison to stealing. Truths are interdependent on the presentation the fruit of what is being said. We can say we care or love dripping with emotion lined with a tenderness in our voices gently touching followed with kind gestures. Or we can say we love and care. Stopping our feet while pacing the floor shaking our finger or fist in the individuals face while yelling every word so loudly that 2 blocks away everyone knows about the conversation doesn’t quite register the wholesome effort or effectiveness in pairing the opposing affiliation 13:50

[@alices726]

Great information

[@larrygonz932]

yep neighbor when he did not know where we are..{lost}.he say to me you don't know where you are. and the same when I was working on a project. {i did not know what i was doing}

[@stacybutler4924]

Amen

[@grafxgrl8030]

What if we are on the receiving end of the criticism from someone who may have a log in their eye? How do we assess the validity of their comments in that light?

[@princepesa]

Talk to a trusted friend who can be unbiased and speak the truth to you

[@ylee5050]

So meeting the husband for a few minutes in the office and because of how he speaks or his stature, that makes him no threat at all? Master manipulators are great at hiding in plain sight.

[@marc_ordazzz]

God bless you

[@shala604]

Lol your right. Not all sin is equal there degrees to the violations

[@CGAV638]

But how to know of the Log is completely out? It can be layered.through several experiences.....

[@hikerhobby1204]

I’d figure when we stop judging others, thinking you know how others should live etc. Maybe when we start completely minding our own business.

[@Window4503]

No, it’s when we adhere to the same standards by which we judge others. Jesus never said to never judge others completely, the context is judging them wrongly, often based on manmade and arbitrary measurements. We have to judge others and do…otherwise how can we avoid dangerous people or choose the right person for a role? The log is out when you see it as a log, that is, when you stop minimizing your flaws while maximizing others’ and simply hold yourself to the same God-given standards. If you want to be shown mercy, then show it; if you don’t want people to be harsh with you then don’t be so with them, etc.

[@ibusiness]

there is plenty of scriptural foundation for the statement that all sin is just sin. physical life removing murder is in fact and according to scripture just as potentially life threatening as gossip. the intention with both is the willful destruction of another, but what really encouraged me to respond to you was hearing that little self satisfied and condescending chuckle that preceded your invalidation, My Dad would use the same device `just before he would invalidate me... so... you have possibly demonstrated to me that you may have NPD traits and definitely have demonstrated that Romans 7 would like a visit from you!!

[@stacybutler4924]

Chiwawa

[@lilianaortner9104]

Everything in Bible has to do with psychology)) In my opinion

[@mariabrambila2481]

No enthusiasm he sounds horrible sounds like he barely has energy to speak. Doesn’t sound sure.