What makes life worth living in the face of death | Lucy Kalanithi

[@TonyNguyen-it7vd]

She is such an emotionally strong woman, giving the full speech without breaking up in tears. And, exactly that is what strengthen the message behind this talk.

[@ysal6570]

most doctors are

[@linanicolia1994]

She is an MD. She learned to be tough in med school. You get tough or you get out.....

[@zes3813]

wrrg

[@bibizeeboohoo741]

Agree with you, truly a remarkable strong 💪 woman, mentally and emotionally. Can only wish her all the best with her daughter for the future.🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@yummypasta92]

The speech also would have been just as good if she did break up in tears. We shouldn't glorify "not crying" as strength. It's ok to cry.

[@shreyaprakash]

"living means more than just staying alive" What beautiful lines.

[@gemmaarnold9655]

I just finished reading WBBA and came straight online to find a photo of Paul, his wife and daughter to put faces to their story. I have cried big fat tears for their loss and bravery, I will likely never forget Paul’s story. Lucy spoke on this TED with such clarity and strength, I’m so inspired by her and by Paul. Thank you for sharing your journey with us x

[@bernardopanesjr6500]

that's what I did too after reading the book.

[@vladav313]

Gemma, I cried like a little boy when I finished his book too. I couldn't believe how much it touched the deepest part of my soul.

[@SilvaAbner]

Me too, I cried from start to finish again.

[@brianpsiropoulos1474]

This book is just so so beautiful. I've read it three times, and it has brought me to tears--multiple times--every single one.

[@kylewest3325]

“To live fully means you’ve endured suffering”. Profound

[@anishraman2978]

When referring to her, TED should have written "Dr. Lucy Kalanithi". As someone who works in medicine and academia, I see that sometimes women with Doctorate degrees are not referred to with their proper title. She's a doctor and should have been referenced as such.

[@zain4019]

I strongly agree. I had a psychiatrist. I asked her her name early on and she said “Dr. Acharya”, and I didn’t quite catch it and replied “Acharya?”, and I really regret not addressing her by her full title today. There was a very slight, barely perceptible hurt on her face when I had said that. She just nodded her head, but I feel as if I should have handled things differently. Small things do matter and it’s these small moments that make up our life.

[@pixie89]

True

[@pragya3450]

Very very true

[@siphokazileratomalinga2969]

Very very true. When I did my first postgraduate studies,there was only one black female in the faculty and she had a Doctorate. The only female that had this. I made sure I called her Dr even if her colleagues called her by her name only😤🙄. It matters. It really does

[@zes3813]

wrg

[@angelicsumire]

I lost my cat this Jan 9th and I thought my year didn't start well and I found myself crying and sobbing,lost, empty and it was all so sudden that I couldn't bring myself to accept it and so I googled the best book on death and found this one and just finished reading it yesterday.I can say I didn't understand everything but I did understand death , the suffering and acceptance and what living meant.

[@LetsDoBetterNow]

Life is so precious and so fragile. So many of us take it for granted. This is such an emotional talk.

[@kwda7804]

Life sucks

[@vaniachrst98]

She is a one brave woman. I just read Paul Kalanithi's book "When Breath Becomes Air".. and witness their struggles from Paul's writing. I think instead of only watching this video, you need to also read the book. I'm no fighting any cancer or any terminal illnesses, i'm perfectly healthy. But i watched far too many people who suffered through it. I really hope everyone gets to see this and read his book. It's honesty gave strength, not only for those who are sick, but literally everyone, especially those struggling to find the meaning of their lives. Thank you, Paul, for writing the book.. and thank you Lucy, for being his voice through this talk.

[@yrisvento]

Wow now I can understand why Paul kalanithi found his soulmate in Lucy. As someone who experienced both sides as a caregiver-companions of my mom during her 6 year cancer and death at the same age of Dr Paul, and few years ago experienced cancer myself.. perfectly understand every single of Lucy’s words.. she is so beautiful. I love their so deep love and soulful connection. My case was the opposite and it hurts more than the cancer. But I survived. As I learned as a teenager from my mom the most important gift, “resilience” to live and to find purpose embracing life with all its colors with pain as joy, the importance of living with appreciation of the here and now, and the true about the fact that to born and dying are both natural processes that we will all go through and that death as a natural process.

[@lutfurpradhani]

Man can be destroyed but can never be defeated . Having said that , to find out a life partner of this amazingly deep chemistry , is sheer luck . Physical demise is inevitably a truth every living being will vanish through but what we create in this ephemeral life is what makes it worth living .

[@nicolepannullo5754]

I'm so glad I found this talk. Thank you for sharing your story. My brother was recently diagnosed with a terminal form of cancer. Your words help.

[@mariamabed753]

That has such a great message. I'm halfway through Paul's book and it is truly inspiring. It has made me cry at some points but it has also made me smile. I would definitely recommend reading it.

[@phuongngocnguyen374]

Could you tell me what its name is? I mean, the book's

[@Cynthia-Landers]

The book is called *When Breath Becomes Air.*

[@phuongngocnguyen374]

cyndish1 😍😉thanks a lot

[@amychumerandthefunkybunch1501]

I was supposed to watch this for my assignment for sociology and now I'm just crying thanks alot professor

[@hawk0485]

She is so brave and he was too. This is one of the most beautiful things I have ever had the privilege to listen to.

[@phuongtrang7373]

I could not resist tears as i turned to the last few pages of the memoir by Paul. At the few last moments of his life, he devoted himself to saving his patients, again. Sometimes while reading the book, i wondered would the chance of recovery be high if he had not returned to doing surgery? I dont know the answer. But i know one thing. He was yearning for a purpose, for the last commitment he could offer. It was absolutely beautiful.

[@arara__]

I totally agree. I want to believe that it would've been different if he hadn't returned to surgery and overworked himself. But his dedication amazes me. His illness hurt me a lot, but his ability to remain positive and always helpful towards others makes me feel so much better; so sorrowful that he had to leave so soon.

[@vitorr2469]

i don’t think it would be, i think he knew he was already gonna die when i read the book, but u never know

[@yvonnec.5854]

There’s no chance of recovery with stage 4 cancer. These patients are pretty much sitting ducks..as how my late husband was. Otherwise, he would still be here.

[@linanicolia1994]

This young woman is tough and trained to face death as it is part of her job as well. When her husband was diagnosed with the deadly cancer, she did not take it personally but grew with the awakening state, we are here, for a very short time and we need to make the best of it. She and her dying husband did just that. Sharing the experience with people makes it more tolerable for her and actually, a very special privilege. There can be beauty in death. I do not mean physical but the beauty of the human spirit. Their little daughter will be proud of them !

[@aubadoir.]

I finished reading Paul's memoir this evening. I am very appreciative of both his and Lucy's willingness to share their story. The strength, compassion, and raw humanity of it all is moving, to say the least, and being able to put a face and voice to the matter is yet another great gift. Thank you for sharing such an elegant account of a decidedly difficult experience.

[@austinharris7653]

I love ted talks and it's ability to be so honest. I feel like we paint a rosey picture because anything less is taboo in today's society. I think talking about sensitive subjects, from an individuals prospective and in a respectful way is key to progress.

[@linanicolia1994]

TED talks are terrific ! everyone of them......you can always learn something......

[@bindiyabodian7818]

Amazon delivered ‘When Breath Becomes Air’ yesterday. I just finished reading it. Very intense. Very compelling. Very well written. A terrible loss to humanity. He was just 36 when he was diagnosed. Rest well Dr Paul. Dr. Lucy, good to know you are in a happy place.

[@dvms75]

A beautiful person.. who was married to an incredible man. Suffering expands and enriches life. Talk about looking at adversity right in the eye, and embracing it with love and care. Thank you guys for sharing with us!

[@timas2791]

I just finished Paul's book. What an incredible, heartfelt story. To top what story he had off with Lucy's epilogue made it even more heart-wrenching. I wouldn't wish on anyone what Paul or his family went through, but what an honest and true insight into life, illness, and death.

[@shesalady76]

There can be no life if there is no death. It stood out and it made perfect sense as did Paul.

[@bibizeeboohoo741]

Romans 5:12 That is why, just as through one man sin entered into the world and death through sin,+ and so death spread to all men because they had all sinned+

[@bibizeeboohoo741]

Genesis 1:28 Further, God blessed them, and God said to them: “Be fruitful and become many, fill the earth+ and subdue it,+ and have in subjection+ the fish of the sea and the flying creatures of the heavens and every living creature that is moving on the earth. This was God's original purpose for man. He never meant for man to die!!! Thankfully 🙏🏼 he is working his way back to fulfill his purpose for us.

[@TobiasTEEHEE]

Beautiful talk and ending words. Thank you. I just finished Paul's book today, and it is one I will carry everywhere I go. Paul lives on, in you, Cady, his family, friends, readers and patients. I wish you all the best!

[@4740424]

I always tell them that there is NO such thing as permanent happiness, but there SURELY can be permanent contentment. Thank you for sharing this GREAT, yet SAD experience! Must have been really tough.

[@spencer5113]

This is one of the most vulnerable and honest ted talks I have seen. So poetic. Everything about her radiates love and compassion.

[@jyotisharma4925]

when breath​ becomes air..

[@stayinthemiddle99]

Love from Rok. I regret myself finding out this amazing TED talk after reading the book three times. Your calm and relaxing speech soothed me a lot, giving me additional inspiration along with what Paul have told us thru memoir. Whenever I feel lethargic for no reason and languid, I read your husband's book and every line imbues energy. Hope you have a peaceful lifetime with your precious daughter Cady:)

[@truthseeker7086]

That was so moving, the loss is never good or comfortable, I lost my beautiful sister to stage 4 colon cancer, she's with JESUS, and I miss her tremendously, but hearing Dr. Kalanithi, brought somewhat comfort, now I will always represent her for the rest of my life. GOD bless you Dr. Kalanithi.

[@jossamwambakha1443]

When Breathe Becomes Air,a great book really humbling "what do you do when life is catastrophically interrupted?"

[@elkiness]

I'm very recently widowed. I wish I had seen this before that happened--after all, I knew it would. The technical medical care was excellent...but I now understand that I was let down in emotional support and did not understand choices about things I didn't realize I could have done differently. I'm left with trying to think of all the good times, aware of how lucky I am in many ways--when the terrible memories of the end of his life invade my mind. After seeing this, I feel I much write to the medical team, who had all good intentions, about what went wrong that could have been prevented. This video is a very good thing; I'm sure it will help many others, and even the way doctors are taught.

[@gingertale_]

How are you?

[@gideong8627]

I finished 'When Breath Becomes Air' a while back, it's seriously amazing. I got it for 10p at a fair and was surprised at how anyone could give something so good. I hope Lucy has an eventful life. RIP Paul

[@kumarutkarsh4016]

Amazing book and even beautiful talk. One thing that I couldn't completely agree with is that 'we always have a choice'. Money and other resources play a huge role in how families deal with a terminal illness. And at times when people are pushed against the wall with crippled finances, not a penny in their banks - maybe then is the time they won't really have a choice.

[@bryanfregoso4903]

This is tear jerking! Thank you for this story! Very inspirational!

[@jessicakleeberger2504]

I just finished reading When Breath Becomes Air (I was touched deeply both times) and was delighted to see this TedTalk and have the opportunity to hear more of Dr. Lucy's perspective. So much respect for them both.

[@Cormac625]

Very sad and very well spoken. I feel I can relate as I recently lost my sister. I like the way she talks about how suffering is not bad but how it helps us to grow. Very inspiring.

[@chepuweakami8684]

Living fully mean accepting Suffering.. this is really amazing.

[@mrzz1999]

"Living is more than just staying alive" "True living = accepting suffering"

[@michie43able]

This is the best Ted talk I've ever heard and I've heard many. As a Physician myself I can say that she eloquently has spoken for so many,

[@WedrownyGrajek]

I have just read Paul's book, literally minutes ago... Inspiring to live and love and that's what I'm gonna do.

[@limnacmani8211]

Could u plz tell me the book name

[@DrSRanjanMBBSAcupuncturist]

@@limnacmani8211 'When Breath become air'

[@ehsansabaghian5617]

I bought Paul's book "When Breath Becomes Air" to read and this is how got to this video. What a life story for all of us. "Living means more than just staying alive". I will carry this lesson forever. RIP Paul.

[@bahara2]

What an amazing heartwarming speech! I was stunned buy her genuine words.

[@Lifeactually2.0]

This was an incredible talk. Very informative, heartfelt and transformational. You are a phenomenal woman and he lived an incredible life. Sending you much love.

[@GMRTranscriptionServicesInc]

This video helped me gain insights into finding the true meaning and purpose of life and how to make it worth living in the face of death...a life-altering experience indeed. Thank you!

[@ftjosephh1817]

I’m at loss of words. She is so.. real and thoughtful and kind. She is a person who deserves the world

[@JennAlessa]

Meaningful and bittersweet. This is such an important thing that we all should remember, living isn't always nice, not always calm. We grow stronger through this hardships. Through this acceptance of the inevitable and through finding the best path for ourselves and the beloved ones around us. Thanks a lot for sharing more than the knowledge of your experiences but a part of your soul.

[@suzannemcclure7412]

I just watched Dr Lucy Kalanithi's talk & was so moved by her having worked through her husband's death with their little daughter. She is a beautiful human.

[@punkrdoodles]

This was such a blessing. Thank you. I never knew how much I needed to hear every word you said. Although our stories are very different, they're also very similar...this gave me hope for the first time in far too long. ❤️

[@zain4019]

You are loved:)

[@Ayshat]

I just finished the book a few hours ago, it was teary. I have to submit a response to it in three days! Lucy looks radiant, glad to see that!

[@mrzz1999]

"Living doesn't mean fighting fate, but helping each other through it"

[@ghadaalkaraki804]

Thank you, Lucy. You are so brave. RIP Paul. Your life, your death, and your book are so inspiring!

[@mayaluna11]

First read the book years ago, then multiple times since. I never found the words to express my gratitude. My profession deals with life and death, and I initially expected insights for on the job. Instead, I received exquisite literature that made me a better clinician and more appreciative, mindful person. Yesterday a patient & fellow reader gifted me with the words: "from his first page, I forgot my fear. He reminded me I'm alive now and I have love to enjoy" Thank you Dr. Lucy Kalanithi, for ensuring that your family's lessons and Paul's art were available to us.

[@desmondkemei3822]

Its 2020.I have fall short of words to express, this is the kind of hope we need as humanity, it does rekindle back your life for a lifetime. MD,DR LUCY you re full of strength, let GOD be with you all of your life

[@amandanorman7524]

Amen

[@MarcioMoura]

4 minutes of video. For me it was about 1 hour. Deeply strong message.

[@yyodi06]

I've read the book and it's one of the most inspiring books I've ever read.

[@bettydithuri-marumo4952]

Thank you for finishing Paul',s manuscript...Great read and this presentation sums it all up...Thanking for sharing your lives.

[@Sweeneytv]

Her bravery is palpable

[@songinsideyun2488]

Very inspirational. I learned to be more brave in my life. Thanks Dr. Kalanithi and Ted! :)

[@dialibek7660]

I've just finished reading the book about her late husband Paul and accidently found this video on Ted. Such a strong woman!

[@samanthacruz5587]

This was so moving! I am reading his book right now. It shows how to appreciate life in all forms.

[@jes8432]

Lucy is indeed very inspirational. Thank you for this.

[@orangeporanges]

The honesty is so important otherwise things will go left unsaid forever. It’s my biggest regret before my mom passed, I wish we were more honest.

[@eddiew2325]

I love u

[@otgonchimeg.b4598]

After his death, I felt so regretful that many people commit to the suicide without knowing the meaning of life! He gave me the strength to fight til the time I face my death. His life was so meaningful cuz it made many people realize the meaning of their lives again. Thank you so much 💞 Thank you soooo muchhhh ❤

[@Techie1224]

what is the meaning of life ??

[@otgonchimeg.b4598]

When you know your worth, no one can make you feel worthless 💕

[@Techie1224]

@@otgonchimeg.b4598 i agree but i still find no point to be worth .. at the end it will not matter and everything will continue so does it matter if someone choose to left little early ?? .. excuse me i try looking for some logical answers and you are free to ignore whatever i say i know its harmful

[@dindhaprimadini7520]

Listening to this after reading Paul's Breath Becomes Air really open my mind

[@RoyAndrews82]

To not be dead. That's what makes it worth it. You could be poor, hungry, ... The good thing here is that you're alive. And that's honestly all that really matters. Because honestly.. you could care less about the other person in another country that doesn't have what you have. As long as you're living your life.

[@Asquared316]

how can anyone dislike it

[@thomnasilikeswordfighting5506]

The 17 dislikes were storm troopers trying to hit the like button

[@thomnasilikeswordfighting5506]

only the force can tell

[@linanicolia1994]

I guess some idiot that dislikes everything and understands nothing. These people are out there too. We usually ignore them.

[@abdullahalbuali1807]

@@linanicolia1994 I know one person who said to me I feel happy every time I see a lot of likes on a video to hit the dislike.

[@anchal2128]

Best thing I have done in 2020 is reading this book

[@crescentmoon374]

Thank you for sharing your story ~ I will be buying your husbands book tomorrow~ pray that you and your daughter will find joy in each day 🙏🙏🙏

[@lovelymouna]

I love Paul's honesty and oppness through his book. Stay strong dear

[@timaa.4379]

I pray for her strength - it's obvious she was holding back tears throughout 💔

[@shanaya5855]

She is the strongest and the most beautiful girl inside out 💖

[@rampradeep1447]

one of the best emotional thing I have ever heard

[@sheeesh404]

Just finished the book, would highly recommend it

[@radagastbrown8204]

Life is really uncertain and thats why its beautifull

[@iwnunn7999]

The baby hit the genetic jackpot!!!!

[@linanicolia1994]

smart and beautiful ? biracial children are always beautiful.

[@kathrynsue1986]

I would love to have a doctor like her

[@nhoncao1212]

its me. I think i saw myself in your story. thanks for your share.

[@saveferris6864]

Have talked to members of my family. We all agree on each other's wishes. It was as hard to talk about death with them as I thought. Talk about it people's.

[@icecreamforever]

Words completely fail me. Powerful stuff.

[@danish829]

Its not like her ted talk moved me but her eyes did!!

[@nguyenuctunglam3497]

the death is not apprehensive, the life without any trial is too fearful ! Thanks Paul for your book ❤

[@alhanoufalhulayyil6147]

AN EYE-OPENING SPEECH!

[@iwnunn7999]

That baby got some amazing DNA!!

00:19 Enfrentando una enfermedad terminal con amor y empatía 02:09 Aprendiendo resiliencia y amor a través del cuidado al final de la vida. 04:06 Enfrentando la muerte con honestidad y amor 05:56 Comprender la importancia de la vida ante la muerte 08:05 Vivir plenamente significa aceptar el sufrimiento 09:59 Entendiendo la importancia de las elecciones en la atención médica 11:59 Tomar decisiones de salud informadas es una elección personal. 14:04 Participar en todos los aspectos de la vida a pesar del sufrimiento Crafted by Merlin AI.

[@duyenothithuduyen1813]

I was cry when i read the book when breath becomes air.

[@thomasfox6217]

thank you so very much for this video. my mom is dieing from cancer now. it hurts so much to see my mom slip away.

[@user-rb4lv4if9q]

So sorry 💛

[@dhbujaviya9271]

Living fully means accept suffering 🌟

[@annielee2172]

Beautifully said

[@marka112]

If I have to be a vegetable in bed on life support etc just to stay alive a few weeks longer, I might as well rather take the shorter time and spend it more better and how I want. I do not want to die slowly, overtime, until I'm at a point of not being able to do what I live for. If I am restricted from my purpose in life, then what do I fight that extra time for. If I'm suddenly given an estimated time, I'd try to enjoy my final walk, rather than worry about how to make the walk longer and miss everything along side it. so I agree, I suppose.

[@Buddy420]

Delitescent Cenotaph my opinion is the same. Im procrastinator. But death is only thing i would not want to procrastinate

[@linanicolia1994]

no vegetable on life support is on anyone's bucket list. Got to figure this one out. If you have family that does not mind caring for you, until the very end, it is good, but it is not always the case. I would not want that , as I am a loner and want to die, my way. My time and my decision unless I get hit by a truck......Got to figure this out.....no hospice for me. I will make sure of that.

[@sourabhraghuwanshi3515]

When breath become air by Paul kalanithi the book which taught the lesson of life and the necessity to understand ourselves

[@deannawilliams425]

A nurse I work with in surgery is a former ICU nurse. She quit because of the excessive care given to patients who are trying to die. So sad. Families need to know it's okay to let go. And not to feel guilty about their decision.

[@Eliot451]

If I was diagnosed with something like that I'd be a basket case. I have such respect for Paul and Lucy Kalanithi. I wish I had half their strength.

[@linanicolia1994]

It is in their scope to deal with death, so when it affects you, you move on with the same attitude. Training.

[@sam.barbershop]

thanks ted

[@nadanailazahra1022]

I watched this talk years ago, read the memoir later (pdf version), but didn't finish it. Today, my best friends sent me the book for my birthday present. Can't wait to read every page of this beautiful memoir ❤️

[@Jcremo]

What medical care will help you live the way you want to? Amazing perspective.

[@sinsukumar5800]

powerful. No hard feelings. But i will say these stories are a day to day story in South Asian region. Ted talks are really doing great but stories of western world doesn't fit with stories of Asian world. Honestly we love listening to ted talks..but always stories about western doctors is what we don't want to hear. We as a doctor have faced so many problems and we do wanna share with the world. Last but nonetheless, I now get we are not meant to be with TED talks..but definitely you are true guys. Thanks

[@AnnaMishel]

So inspiring!

[@nainapakhrin4048]

so inspiring....thank u

[@jundemo6573]

thanks for your talking

[@SusansEasyRecipes]

So sad story. I am glad share with us.

[@jiminvogue1223]

I'm reading when breath becomes air and I'm 20 pages away from the epilogue I dont want to read it. I don't know want to end it yet.

[@brianbutler922]

I love this video!!! thanks