The 4 Attachment Styles Explained: Find Out Yours!

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@chrisdigitalartist 3 ай бұрын

Hi Julia! Senior Shifter Chris here! My take-away and notes: The 4 Attachment Styles Explained: Find Out Yours! First of all, this was nice to review these attachment styles as that was one of my favorite masterclasses in the Shift Society! I’ve been working on my attachment style, moving from an anxious attachment to feeling more secure in who I am. It’s been a transformative journey, and I hope my story can inspire others who might be on a similar path. Looking back at my anxious attachment style, it was challenging because I felt very insecure in who I was and had a sense of low self-esteem and worth. I would want to seek external validation. Then, since being a shifter, I started to have more self-awareness and began to understand my anxious attachment style and recognizing patterns in my behavior. I started to give myself care and compassion, and build that sense of trust in myself, love, and a sense of security in who I am. I started to tell myself that I am worthy and valued. I love and accept myself as I am. I have now become more secure in who I am and don’t seek that external validation from others and don’t need to cling onto anyone. Today, I feel more secure in my relationships and within myself. I still have areas to improve, but overall, I feel more confident and secure. Here are my notes: *Attachments styles is how people relate to other people. *The 4 Attachment Styles are: 1. Secure: You feel good getting close to others and have a general sense of trust in those relationships. You can be yourself and express your needs. 2. Anxious: You often feel anxious in relationships. You seek a lot of validation and reassurance in your relationships. You may feel like you need to be with another person or have communication most of the time to feel secure and safe. When you don't have that, you feel anxious. You are afraid of abandonment. 3. Avoidant: You tend to avoid closeness or intimacy. You value your independence. You find it uncomfortable getting too close to people. When you do feel like you are getting to emotionally close to others, you have an urge to pull away. You might feel trapped or suffocating in a close relationship. 4. Disorganized: Probably the hardest style. You go back and forth between anxious and avoidant. It makes it harder for the other person as well because it isn't consistent. It comes from feeling or thinking low self-worth, not feeling good enough and a lot of shame. It may come from trauma too.

@Beatsmith2005 3 ай бұрын

‘cause she looks cool af in b&w

@Marekcatholic 3 ай бұрын

Very informative, thank you Julia!

@malaymondal280 3 ай бұрын

Good morning .....l am from India,l see your video every morning..it is so helpful.. I am grateful to you❤

@mentaldisorderrider6929 3 ай бұрын

I was disorganised. Now I am avoidant. ❤❤❤

@myoungberg72 3 ай бұрын

Disorganized. This was so informative.

@laurenl720 3 ай бұрын

Disorganized attachment style sounds like me. But secure attachment with my hubby. Takes a while for me to trust someone. Haven’t heard of that one before. Thought I was avoidant attachment style.

@Balaji67654 Ай бұрын

Mee too same

@rongike 3 ай бұрын

I guess secure sounded most accurate but I think my other mental health issues have manifested me to set some weird subconscious boundaries because I didn't consciously acknowledge that I needed them.

@Gingerbread_Man23 3 ай бұрын

I’m all 4 currently

@Dogandcatmom51 3 ай бұрын

I’ve had an anxious attachment style for my whole life, but recently my dad died, and I felt that my family wasn’t there for me. Now I feel like I’ve developed an avoidant or anxious/avoidant style because I’ve been so hurt as an adult. Can that happen? Can our adult relationships change our attachment style? Also, I’m different with different people. With people who push me away, I become anxious, and now I’m learning to be avoidant (like I don’t want to keep chasing them and exposing myself to them if they don’t want me). With people who are consistent , I feel secure.

@kburns2470 Ай бұрын

You sound like you're the disorganized type, and I've read that spending time with and having relationships with secure people can teach the other types to be and feel more secure, which is very encouraging! Change is possible.