The Truth About Football

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Football is good, old-fashioned fun. However, this fun does cause degenerative brain disease.
FOLLOW THE CAST:
ALLY: / lilbeardsley
GRANT: / grantob
KATIE: / katiemarovitch
TRAPP: / mikewtrapp
RAPH: / chestangraphael
REKHA: / rekhalshankar
BRENNAN: / brennanlm
SAM: / samreich
Football is good, old-fashioned fun. However, this fun does cause degenerative brain disease.
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CAST
Danny Dip - Mike Trapp
Chuck Puber - Brennan Lee Mulligan
Mike Bike - Jessica Ross
Gina Jeans - Rekha Shankar
CREW
Director - Greg Stees
Writer - Grant O'Brien
Producer - Francesca McLafferty
Production Coordinator - Jessica Clemons
Director Of Photography - Alex Pollini
Production Designer - Nicole Case
HMU - Kathleen Pardo
Sound Mixer - Mike Robertson of BoTown Sound
Editor - Nick Rood

[@pragon1173]

The joke here is really only in tone, everything they're saying is 100% true and very serious. Genius.

[@acookie7548]

satire

[@thomasrosebrough9062]

True true. It's funny only because it's framed as interrupting a regular sportscast with legit truth bombs. The truth bombs themselves are not funny at all but rather *(insert Brennans news voice)* extremely frightening.

[@NathanTarantlawriter]

All true and one of the reasons our country is failing.

[@twothirdsanexplosive]

It's a news report where Trapp's character is the joke.

[@ziwuri]

@@acookie7548 cope

[@gabenorwood3943]

The most surprising thing was that this was written by Grant and not Brennen.

grant is low key one of the smarter, more sensitive ones. he somehow manages to be both sharp and tender

[@sabosage]

That doesn't actually surprise me.

[@P1ranh4]

You can be sure Brennan jumped on this one though

[@CaptainDoomsday]

Grant is pretty passionate about this stuff, if you've been following the themes.

[@jeffkobe2943]

Grant hating on masculinity, doesn’t surprise me

[@isha692]

"Choice is part of a social construct. Social pressure can be subtle but in fact it is impossibly strong" Never thought I'd hear something so powerful on a College Humor skit

[@logicaloverdrive8197]

Real shit for a real subject.

[@OK-yy6qz]

That's pretty dumb though you can still choose to do or not do something even though your options are obviously limited

[@brittanynguyen3794]

I’m awake and not going back to sleep.

[@luther0013]

James Scalzo but impossibly strong.

[@luther0013]

General Coma your point only stats that people done credit the thing when it happens. That doesn’t show it doesn’t exist. There are many experiments that have been run on this. The most interesting part in mob mentality which is a kind of social pressure.

[@gavinthorud220]

I like how Brennan emphasizes “these BOYS”

[@vee8101]

Katie’s true successor

[@thatidentitythief8962]

There're men or should I say....boys

[@muhammadgheith2492]

A precursor to SPANKINGS... for the boys!

[@vicentecastro4221]

These B W O Y S!

[@mitchwhitfield1840]

So so young

[@Silverwind87]

"Is the choice between abject poverty and bodily harm really any choice at all?" This is a concept a lot of people don't seem to grasp.

[@candicefrost4561]

Cough cough prostitution cough cough pornography cough cough

[@theguywhomakesthetrees2057]

I'll take bodily harm any day

[@garlowloke]

I love how there couldn’t possibly be any other options. So many places in America are just football factories, no school, no stores, no libraries, no government buildings, just coal mine or football. It’s sad really.

[@charlesrorke2575]

There are a million ways to pay for college.

[@vertiac]

@@charlesrorke2575 Yeah, you could just join the army.

[@JakeMoorehead]

All of these people are asking how Brennan can keep such a straight face... Maybe it's because, despite the fact that the skit is great, all of the sad things he's saying are true.

[@logicaloverdrive8197]

AudaciousGecko this becomes less funny when you *really* listen to what they’re saying, considering I’m going to college next year, that bit about how much the coaches are paid hit harder

[@gmork1090]

Head college football coaches making 11, 8, 7 million dollars a year... this is literally why we can't have nice things and teachers get paid shit and... yeah. Horrifying stuff.

[@jajouji]

@@gmork1090 I don't think you are really understanding why they are paid so much. It's because they are making much more in ad revenue and merchandising than the stadium costs and coaching. They are making more money for the university to use towards things that arent lucrative. Not evil or anything, just economics

[@venuss.9670]

eggsriceandcheese True, but when there are students not able to pay for books and even some of the players who don’t get a free ride or even good scholarships, and the college is throwing it all at coaches and new stadiums, it kind of shows the true intentions of the school. And if the coaches make MILLIONS of dollars a year, surely they can take a bit of a budget cut to help students get an education they need to stay in todays economy. :/ Don’t get me wrong, they deserve a good pay, but colleges are for education, and it becomes infuriating when more money is thrown at sports, rather than education all the students can have.

[@DarkBunnyLord]

eggsriceandcheese I get that the coaches bring in money but that doesn’t explain why the players are paid nothing. They’re also super important to the game last time I checked and even if you argue that the coach is more important as they train and plan everything out which I agree they are more important than most individual players the fact that the entire team as a whole makes a whopping 0$ shoots the entire argument that earning value is what determines pay in the foot.

[@mysterylovescompany2657]

I feel like we don't talk enough about Trapp's acting chops; not only is he a pro at camp and of overreaction, but also, his mastery of microexpressions is legitimately impressive. His slow, increasingly more desperate breakdown in this skit required no suspension of disbelief, at all. Nice going, Trapp! :-D

[@lordlegendary505]

A true professional

[@cameronp6176]

Trapp and Brennan are the best actors Collegehumor has, for sure

[@mysterylovescompany2657]

Oh, yeah, Brennan's CEO series is some of my favourite CH acting across the board, for sure.

[@artemisfowldragon]

Coupled with Brennan, they’re an absolute powerhouse of potential

[@skyarmyjd3]

Brennan and Trapp is peak Straightman/Funnyman routine

[@14jmichaels]

I have a neighbor who went to college on a football scholarship, but when he got concussed sophomore year they kicked him off the team because he was too concussed to keep playing, and took away his scholarship. Now he works as a Walmart cashier. Why do the people running college sports think this is OK?

[@delathenleso5793]

@@Draclonis College Football makes a stupidly huge amount of money. As long as that stays true, nothing will change.

[@JE-zl6uy]

Because the NCAA made 1.1 Billion dollars in Revenue last year, a majority of which goes to "Administrative" costs (ie: the people running the programs) and a whopping 10s of thousands of dollars of that money goes to any non-sports education programs, everything else goes to the coaches and to the school's stadiums.

[@savagedragon79]

He made a deal. The college offered him a free or discounted education in exchange for being a productive player. Your friend broke the deal. It's a dangerous sport and as long as it's adults playing they accept all risk.

[@meismehaha]

@@savagedragon79 Broke the deal not by choice, but injury. That's fucked dude. I don't know if I believe his story at all though, I have a friend who was playing college ball but was injured (not concussion) and he got to keep the scholarship.

[@HackersSun]

(*smh*) I dont get it either and everyone in the resturant I work at LOVES college football And I cant STAND IT

[@securedigit]

"The owning class in this country only profits at the expense of the working class." Chuck Puber

[@DeepSohelia1]

That's comrade puber to you

[@EjvindGEMDark]

@Aaron Smith I understand what communism is - what do you think it is?

[@sassycassgames3158]

@Aaron Smith Talking about the existence of class war, and it's negative effects, is uhhhhh very communist, actually

[@riz3310]

@@EjvindGEMDark communism is the collective self-actualization of the species into a higher plane of social consciousness.

[@apexcrypto01]

@@riz3310 hahaha you're a joke lmao

[@banditraccoon8476]

I love how serious Brennan always is, but makes it funny

[@TiagoMorbusSa]

"I'm awake and I'm not going back to sleep!"

[@jonm686]

He did replace zach tho... that is unforgivable

[@tnk4me4]

Zack who?

[@jonm686]

Tnk4me smh

[@tnk4me4]

@Jonathan Lumbreras 🙃

[@aa-mb6rs]

"Is the choice between abject poverty and bodily harm really any choice at all?" - The plot of Squid Game

[@robsonclark9678]

Hah, damn...

[@DeathnoteBB]

And somehow bootlickers are still defending capitalism

[@zackjones8802]

@@DeathnoteBB When the alternative has repeatedly failed, I find it understandable that people would be supportive of capitalism. Do I think pure capitalism is a good idea? No, absolutely not. Do I think that capitalism with tax-funded welfare services is a good idea? Yes.

[@foolsvideofactory]

@@zackjones8802 are you referring to the numerous times worldwide numerous countries have attempted to pursue socialism or socialistic policies to benefit their people until the US Government intervenes and causes instability? That alternative?

[@draconbacon6395]

I love how Jess Delivers the most horrendous lines with a happy and upbeat personality .

[@zyaicob]

"It literally... dRiVeS tHeM iNsAnE"

[@DrZaius3141]

Jess's inflections are... ... off the charts.

[@ruckdhehh2970]

When a discussion about football turns to a question if there is a god

[@shadowrain1024]

I mean at some point doesn't every discussion? And isn't the answer always: "I kinda hope not. Otherwise I have several issues I need to take to the manager"

[@shiloh4754]

It also slowly turns into a conversation about workers rights

[@loupaschris]

Well, that escalated quickly

[@chillmoney3858]

Lul

[@evil_planner]

So stupid they just HAD to do it.

[@seopark7467]

"and is the choice between abject poverty and bodily harm really any choice at all?"

[@meismehaha]

@@Ultimatelocke No, it's "Is the choice between not being able to pay for college while disappointing your family and bodily harm really any choice at all?'

[@skele3310]

@@Ultimatelocke i mean, in some cases they would be in poverty otherwise, not because they have no other skills, but because the exploitation of their physical and mental well-being through playing football on a scholarship is the only way they could afford college. you think an entry-level job would be enough for them pay for it? it's not racist to point out that capitalism is greatly flawed and can be very effectively utilized to serve racist means.

[@Ultimatelocke]

​@@skele3310 Then by that logic how does every single person get into COLLEGE without playing football. You're entire argument is destroyed dude. My friend who literally was flat broke with no money during highschool got into a community college on a scholarship with a GPA of like 3.2? You act like you need to do physical sports inorder to get a scholarship which is a joke, if anything realistically scholarships for physical sports is the EASY way to get into college. You could have a crappy GPA no extra credit hours, no community service, nothing. All you need to do is be good at a sport and you get a full ride scholarship but "yeah" they are totally exploited That argument is beyond stupid. Its sad that yes everything is true about the dangers of football but that doesn't change the fact they aren't being exploited by given an opportunity to go to college for free. You can easily turn that down go to college via many different scholarships which are based by GPA & if they are a minority there is additional scholarships for them as well. So my point is if you try to make a stupid argument about them being exploited for "profit" that's a good joke. Also this statement below is extremely racist. Just because they are football players they lack the intelligence to do well in school and get a scholarship based on GPA? Because that's exactly what you are saying when you tell me its impossible for them to afford college without getting scholarships for a physical sport. "exploitation of their physical and mental well-being through playing football on a scholarship is the only way they could afford college"

[@skele3310]

@@Ultimatelocke i wasn't talking about all people going to college, nice way to completely twist my words. truly the man of straw you constructed is obliterated. i'm talking about college football players. your anecdotal friend story about community college has nothing to do with this either, what are you on about? also, it's not just minorities who play for football teams, am i somehow being racist to white players as well because i'm pointing out the massive flaw in the system? how is pointing out the multimillion dollar college football industry's exploitation of its players equate to saying that said players have no other skills? even *if* the players were literally only good at playing football, that wouldn't make the exploitative nature any less true. but yes, continue to tell me how trying to improve society through critiques of capitalism are somehow racist.

[@Ultimatelocke]

​@@skele3310 In those cases they would be in poverty because of their own choices which means its their fault. No one has a gun to your head forcing you to skip school or mess around in class. No one is forcing you to get bad grades and not go to afterschool tutor sessions which a vast majority of schools do for free. Majority of entry level jobs now even pay some amount towards colleges which I find is crazy, so yes probably about 30% of students aren't getting any crazy scholarships and they are going to college just fine. If you go to college for a legitimate field then you should easily be able to get a job, if you decide to go to college for lets say "Lesbian dance theory" then don't complain when you finally realize that college is a scam unless you're going into a "VERY" worthwhile field.

[@tophu7903]

I love how Brennan goes on an anti-capitalist rant every chance he can

[@white2495]

just for curiosity but, what are his political and religious believes?

[@mohammedmahfuri1078]

@@white2495 Almost all of DROPOUT's cast are left-leaning.

[@white2495]

@@mohammedmahfuri1078 i kind of assumed that thank you. (who are the ones that not?)

[@stansman5461]

@@mohammedmahfuri1078 explains why they're out of business and now are in moderate mediocre shows.

[@MrDavidKord]

@Stansman They're actually doing extremely well, college humor broke into several big nerd comedy and pop culture companies that are all doing better than CE ever did. Ever see Dimension 20?

[@SeanLaMontagne]

Crazy how college ball players can have their likeness used in sports videogames that sell millions of copies and them still receive zero compensation.

[@phytonso9877]

Crazy how that wasn't true for most of the past decade after a court case (O'Bannon vs. NCAA) ruled that the NCAA could not sell those likenesses, and now isn't true because changes in the NCAA Name, Image, and Likeness (NIL) compensation rules stemming from a Supreme Court case (NCAA v. Alston) the NCAA lost mean they CAN receive compensation for their likeness, which is part of the reason the NCAA Football video game series has been revived. It's almost like you, like most of the people commenting here, are just anti-football for cultural reasons and regurgitate talking points without understanding.

[@kkeidot]

"Which taught me a great lesson: That the world is so crazy, if you present things the way that they are, it comes across as broad satire." -Stan Lee 1977

[@kinyutaka]

For those not in the know, CTE is "Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy", basically "persistent brain damage caused by repeated hitting of the head" The only people that get it more than football players are ring fighters (boxing/MMA)

[@CaptainDoomsday]

@James Scalzo Yeah it's almost like getting hit in the head a lot is dangerous.

[@luther0013]

James Scalzo you forget that the NFL covered up the long term effects of constant head injuries. So the players were unknowingly putting themselves at risk.

[@CamJames]

@@luther0013 and that several players have retired before 30 to reduce the likelihood of lasting damage, now that they know about the risks.

[@riversouder3375]

Statistically MMA is actually less dangerous than football. I'm not sure about boxing vs football or boxing vs mma when it comes to injuries but I know MMA is safer than football

[@lucifaerislifeandstuff5181]

@@riversouder3375 Boxers that don't get it are generally highly defensive boxers that while great at the sport don't rack in that much money. I used to box as a young adult and I did alot to Make sure I wasn't hit in the head like switching between guards, moving around, leaning back, Bob and weaving so when my opponent got to round 8 and starting to get winded I would just start plowing on them hiting them in the stomach and ribs to knock them out.

[@xander2698]

"I'm awake and i'm not going back to sleep" More powerful words have never been spoken

[@ethanking4902]

R/im14andthisisdeep

[@jacksonstein809]

Xander Me at myself when I know I have to get up early tomorrow

[@AudioGAWD]

@@ethanking4902 not deep, just not talked about as much lol

[@leahcarson1822]

I’m 21 with multiple injuries that I’ll be dealing with for the rest of my life,injuries I was encouraged to sustain by coaches in a game I never wanted to play😊

[@makokx7063]

Shouldn't have played then.

[@leahcarson1822]

@@makokx7063 solid advice I’ll make sure to think of that next time I’m an impressionable teenager

[@Hamble_Gambles]

@@makokx7063 question: did you even watch the video? it has an around 15-second segment explaining exactly why you are dead wrong in every word of this comment.

[@PinoccThePiccolo]

My mom had a similar instance, she had pulled a muscle in a game of softball but her coach forced her back out despite her wishes and she ended up tearing her muscle and losing all of her scholarships. It's stupid how some coaches just don't care about their players at all.

[@itsd0nk]

@@makokx7063 What an utterly obtuse and moronic response to this person, that was. Telling someone that doing something as a teenager that their parents, teachers, coaches, and peers likely all encouraged, coerced, or possibly even demanded for them to do. They likely trusted all those people and thought they were being their best self, and very likely wasn’t made aware of the long term implications and dangers of it all. SMH. Some people don’t even need repeated head trauma for their brains to stop working.

[@KeiganZ]

Okay this is genuinely a great reverse of form from the typical sketch, which is layered in irony and typically everyone is doing /the bad thing/ while one is like “mmm, maybe not” (which still makes me laugh and gives a good point). Not only is the, seemingly, main argument shared by most of the viewers, Trapp’s disagreement adds to the humor and speaks to a lot of people who feel the same without insulting them. It’s just a very well written piece and I like it.

[@dickatry2854]

I thought this would be an “Adam ruins Everything” video

[@elnumbrotres]

Frisk Dreemur he already had an episode on it

[@lizzy6104]

Brennan ruins everything

[@revolvency]

Adam was right, Brennan rules

[@declanglover4752]

Frisk Dreemur it was already it was in season 1

[@MrMuntathir]

Strangely it's not

[@jacobcooley8052]

"American history is a labyrinth of nightmares"

[@42ndguardian]

Yes, but what nation's history isn't? Oh wait I can answer my own question, Oceania

[@mathewfinch]

@@42ndguardian the goal isn't to not have a nightmare history. The solution to the US having a nightmare history is to simply stop pretending that the US's history is perfect, or even mostly good.

[@PhelesDragon]

As someone with a best friend who’s brain is literally killing him from having played college football, this hit different.

[@JulesThePsion]

Real talk here. I suffered only a single, relatively "mild" concussion a year and a half ago, and STILL struggle with very REAL symptoms today. Even normal, everyday activities and stress I used to brush off before can sometimes make me reel and feel like my head is in a vice. My heart really goes out to these athletes who sustain these kind of brain injuries over and over and over and over. Just one concussion has the potential to change you, and Jessica is right about CTE. The saddest part is, by the time football players are finally able to retire from their sport, dementia, early onset alzheimer's and personality disorders are waiting just around the corner.

[@BlizzardofOze]

I played football all through middle school and high school and somehow miraculously never suffered a concussion. I think.

[@JulesThePsion]

@@BlizzardofOze Oh, you'd KNOW. Trust me, it ain't the sort of thing you can have happen to you and not realize it. Congratulations on your luck.

[@JulesThePsion]

@Huoncroll I smashed the back of my skull into a waterslide because I decided it would be fun to sit up instead of lying back.

[@thatonedog819]

@@JulesThePsion note to self, don't do that.

[@k4zum4s4m4]

my cousing has a crack in his skill exactly because of that same "fun" idea. I was there in the park when it happened i though he was going to die, so much blood...

[@helenarosno]

If Brennan and Adam teamed up... they would probably- yeah they would definitely take over the world

[@woodside4life]

Um, actually...you’re right

[@Wolfwood2057]

I'd hope Adam could be a bit more middleground though. This was so one sided I had to ask myself "So why do they do it?" I mean like the guy said, it is a choice. And yes Peer Pressure can make a choice not a choice, but then nobody wanted to say why there is peer pressure to begin with. In fact growing up I can't say I faced any peer pressure to participate in sports 'at all'. I'm sure there's gotta be more than a handful who are on the "it's fun!" side who are participating in the sport.

[@dlivingstonmcpherson]

@@Wolfwood2057 I think the main issue is that most of the students are required to participate in the sport into to get scholarships to go to classes: therefore they are compelled to trade their brain's health for education.

[@HandsomeYoungBlackMan]

I want them to have a show together

[@userfriendly2737]

They could do an episode together; Adam Ruins all of Brennan's Comedic Performances by Being Onscreen.

[@Quarter_Turn]

"The owning class in this country only profits at the expense of the working class." Brennan gets it!

[@youngjakey1]

This has the energy of underfunded theatre kids exposing overfunded sports programs and I’m absolutely here for it

[@ziwuri]

that's quite literally what this is lol, probably half of Dropout's cast are former theatre kids

[@Be_A_Bi_Warlock]

@@ziwuriall of them were, most likely

[@asagoldsmith3328]

My HS took a grant given to the school foe their exceptional arts and music programs and spent it on a new football field.

[@barbershopbible]

Classic

[@Matt-hx4vn]

Thank you for calling out how much coaches are paid! Seriously, we ask broke college students to pay $35,000+ per year but pay college coaches in the millions.

[@danguy7595]

Cuz they make so much money from college football and don't even have to pay the players

[@imlo2738]

Something you should maybe try to learn in college is that people are paid according to how much money they can generate. If you could lead a program that brings in 100 million+ per year for your bosses, you'd make a lot of money too. You can certainly take issue with it if you want or believe the athletes should be paid (I agree, they should), but trying to compare the worth to the school of the head football coach to a student going to classes makes no sense.

[@imlo2738]

@Malum The OP didn't because they think that the amount a student pays in tuition has some correlation to how much football coaches get paid. As far as changing it...why? What does it matter to you what someone else gets paid? I can certainly understand wanting to see the athletes get paid (I agree with that), but the coaches are paid according to the success of the program. If the program generates 100s of millions, what do you think the coaches should get paid? Football is a money-maker for the school, plain and simple. The school wants to ensure their program is one of the best in the country so they continue to make that money. The two most important factors to winning is recruitment and coaching. The head football coach is responsible for both. So, the colleges can either pay coaches based on their worth to the school (which is millions) or they can pay some figure you'd be happy with and get a shit coach and see their program tank. Seems like a simple choice to me. Now you said you want to see this changed. How would you change it? In America you get paid based on what you can generate. That's capitalism. That's why a worker at McDonalds doesn't get paid as much as a doctor. Anyone can do the McDonalds job and it doesn't generate much revenue, while a doctor requires lots of education and can generate a ton of money for the hospital/organization, etc.

[@Betherun]

So sad.

[@BarginsGalore]

iMLO it is not about how much money they generate. It is about the how little a company can get away with paying their employees

[@finnhuman9230]

“Penn State talk about boys” 💀💀

[@anone.mousse674]

"CHUCK-"

[@kite-flying_potato]

Flawless. Grant's really impressive when he's not sliding around in his own breakfast.

[@Ch17638]

In my high-school a very good rugby player once got very badly injured , his parents without insurance got stuck with massive medical bills , the school (with all its sponsorships, and even the year before a 1st team rugby jersey auctioned for $10k) did not offer to pick up a bill once, they just wanted to know when he will be ready to play again , he did recover and played until the end of high school, today he farms in pain and walks with a limp. Me a 6"5 guy with a strong build took a ton of crap from my school for giving up rugby very early after I got spear tackled in the back , today I am in tip top shape no pain and I use my brain to develop software , I made the right choice.

[@kwokpinglau2400]

Sorry to hear about his injury, and glad you got out from it.

[@jacobandrews2663]

You sure did pal. I pity the other dude tho, hope he's ok

[@zyaicob]

Pretty sure tackling someone in the back is illegal. Good on you for making your choice.

[@Ch17638]

@@zyaicob yes it is the guy got a red card and I spent 2 weeks in recovery. Gave me time to think. At higher levels players start playing dirty

[@mrirror2277]

@@Ch17638 dodged a literal human bullet right there

[@pedrobarbosa1187]

It's a shame that Trapp is going to kill Brennan eventualy, he is great

[@MrWorldOfQuests]

Where is Pat?

[@punishedwaluigi3518]

World of quests he went to a nice farm upstate

[@IjeomaThePlantMama]

"Urban knew, he knew the whole time." Blazing hot take.

[@jwalker6168]

"Or is it more likely given all the injustice in the world that there is, no god?" This is such a fantastic sketch. I don't know if they still do these short sketches on dropout, but I really miss them.

[@TimdeVisser86]

I absolutely love the revolutionary wave CH is riding. Never crest that wave, comrades.

[@volodiafyk]

Communism should be classified as domestic terrorism

[@tnk4me4]

Chris Benoit had CTE. In his insanity he killed both his wife and his son then committed suicide after he was lucid enough to realize what he'd done. Tragic man. Wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

[@sechabatheletsane9784]

Tnk4me i miss him

[@CassyVilAudios]

I would wish it on my worst enemy, but it is still absolutely tragic, and sadly not the only time CTE ended up killing its victims in that way.

[@tnk4me4]

@@CassyVilAudios Wow I wonder what somebody did to make you so mad that you'd wish they'd go all Dragon reborn on their family.

[@RS-kt5po]

i HAVE wished it on my worst enemy. And it worked!

[@tnk4me4]

@@RS-kt5po weird flex, but okay.

[@CaptainDoomsday]

Whoawhoawaitwait...this is a college game? Oh, those kids aren't getting paid shit. They won't even get the rights to their own likenesses.

[@AleksandarBell]

As I'm in college this sketch has never hit harder. I watch as I struggle to pay for textbooks as my school builds new stadiums and waits, WAITS to renovate my building even though the elevator breaks down a LOT.

[@MaliaMelton]

How many takes did this need?? Or is Brennan just that good because I can't believe how straight-faced he stayed the whole time.

[@elloweeze]

Brennan is one of the most talented cast members he’s just that good

[@pinakisaha9970]

Brennan is a comedy god

[@Doinge]

there's a reason he's never on Breaking News: he doesn't break

[@Marcvelous3]

How...

[@travispratt3571]

I'd be straight faced too, talking about such a serious topic. Plus (at least for me), football's so uninteresting there's no way I could crack a smile.

[@arceuslordofcreation8824]

"Penn State, oh talk about boys"

[@nataliehill1472]

Arceus Lord of Creation that had me dying. I wonder if many people caught it...

[@SlugKiss]

oh yikes that's dark

[@15thCrypt]

@@nataliehill1472 as soon as I heard Penn State I thought "oh god"

[@thevillageidiot2935]

I don't get it. Someone please explain

[@cocoachuu]

Geeky Nerd don’t really understand. molestation joke?

[@MrE_]

Brennens small tie makes me uncomfortable

[@Kylephibbsky]

Mr.E I’m so glad I’m not the only one. I hated it so much it distracted me from the comedy.

[@wanderingbufoon]

only the tie? his blazer is one size too small. I mean cuffs and even where the the lapel meets is not below the breast.

[@irogt]

@@wanderingbufoon I think he's wearing a butler Jacket. Specifically because of how quickly the lapel ends.

[@AaronLockman]

My personal headcanon is that Grant wrote this sketch, saw his own description of Chuck as a "recently woke football pundit," and immediately thought "Yeah, Brennan. That's Brennan." And he was RIGHT! It's an accurate description of his whole VIBE!

[@lexxstrum]

Well, since I live in Ohio and my Facebook feed is nothing but Ohio State/Michigan stuff today, I think I'm going to post this and watch the world burn.

[@SurprisinglyDeep]

Do it and tell everyone here the results! 😃

[@ZeonTwilight]

I like your style of Chaos Chum.

[@lexxstrum]

@@SurprisinglyDeep, Sad to say there was no reaction: they were too busy fearing a loss, and then celebrating a comeback and then screaming about total domination to notice.

[@biggiec8933]

I live in Michigan, Detroit in fact.

[@ZeonTwilight]

@@lexxstrum Well, I can't really say I'm surprised. Sportsball fans tend to know the facts about football, while still being relatively comfortable with those facts.

[@elijahpepe]

Adam? Have you taken over the titles?

[@BomaTV1]

yes yes he has

[@PrincePossum]

elijahpepe exactly

[@livingbeing3198]

BomaTV commas are important people

[@stephenking5852]

People only like watching footfall because seeing other people act violent allows us to not act violent.

[@thevillageidiot2935]

That's what I thought

[@kevinwillems8720]

"American history is a labyrinth of nightmares." Facts though

[@AshleyZinyk]

3:13 "We are told by Christ..." I did *not* see that coming.

[@cynthiacler9284]

I should show this to my son cause he wants to play, but I won't let him. 1 reason is because for the last 3 years the local city football league coach always seems to be at my sons baseball games (he says his son plays in the league and is their to watch his son play ball) and is ALWAYS asking me if I am ready to let my son play football for his team. My answer every time NOPE!! Then the coach always says "You can't keep him sheltered forever, you gotta cut those apron strings lady". The only reason he wants him to play is cause he is 15 and 6 ft tall and weighs in at 170. So i can imagine the only reason he wants my son on his team is to have him tackle all the other players on the opposing team. I don't give a shit what he says to me about not letting my son play for him. I only care about my son not getting hurt and being able to remember his name when he is 40 years old and not all fucked up from football. As far as I am concerned that guys a fucking creep!

[@EbonysBlaze]

You can't control your son's decisions forever, you have to show him the dangers so that he understands and can be wary of people who are just looking for profit over safety like that coach. In most other sports injuries happen when you follow bad form, he would make a good basketball player or volleyball player!

[@cynthiacler9284]

@@EbonysBlaze Nope I sure can't control his actions forever, but that's a parents job to help their kids make good decisions so the child can live a long healthly life until he's either 18 or out on his own. Hey if you have kids and want them to play football, great I am happy for you. I hope you go to his games and enjoy watching him play. Just as I enjoy watching my son play baseball every season. Because that's a sport that I as a mom feel safe for him to play with a much less chance of getting seriously hurt.

[@Nortarachanges]

Cynthia Cler, while I love baseball and have been going to games my whole life, I do want to warn you that professional baseball players have to play a lot more games than football players. It’s a much safer sport, but 180+ games are pretty wearing I wish you well and hope your son has fun and becomes strong in all ways ^_^

[@SaintsFan2881]

Realistically if your son plays defense all he has to do is not tackle with his head, which is what all defensive players SHOULD be doing. When I played my coaches always said to lead with your shoulder, so if he does that he'll literally be fine. Don't use your head, can't get a head injury.

[@brianrothrock5893]

@@EbonysBlaze True, and I can make the decision for them not to play as long as they live under my roof (hopefully 18) and then they will not have the skills to compete in college football ... even if they want to :)

[@AbsolXGuardian]

I was expecting the usual "football is dangerous" thing presented in a humorous way. I was presently surprised about the stuff about how economic inequality plays into it.

[@billybobjoe198]

With student loans, economic inequality has nothing to do with it. Anyone can afford to go to any school they want. That's why we have a massive student debt crisis. And the entire idea that the fact that many top tier athletes are "minorities" isn't some massive conspiracy either. Races are all different and some are on average far better at certain things than others.

[@wiltedlamp5016]

byw thx, you said what I would have. Also, economic inequality isn’t a bad thing. Capitalism at its purest is equality of opportunity, and socialism is equality of outcome (economic equality, everyone gets paid the same no matter what). Every time we try one of those two options, it tends to destroy whatever country it got implemented in.

[@anaxa4883]

^^ right-wing NPC's

[@ottovonbismarck4308]

Nick Name Apple profile pic, "Nick Name", generic left of center liked videos. Classic npc

[@potatoheadhaoy]

@@wiltedlamp5016 this is incorrect. John Rawls' concept of pure meritocracy was created with minimizing the unmerited contingencies which prevent the implementation of a true state of equal opportunity, which, by the way requires strong social backing to establish. Even if you go with neoclassical economics capitalism as such isn't an ideal solution for the distribution of goods and services unless pareto efficiency is reached, which is clearly not the case.

[@AFK_Oracle]

When Brennan says "I'm awake and I'm not going back to sleep" I died💀💀💀

[@superswiftpics]

I love the tone he has. He's speaking in the infomercial tone that all commentators has. Even though what he is saying is incredibly depressing he has that enthusiastic monotone.

[@GirlwithSwordandBow]

I love when ya'll stop giving a shit a go right into 'we live in a nightmare capitalist hellscape' territory , it's hilarious, it's needed and it's brave and true

[@CaptainDoomsday]

You should pick up Last Week Tonight if you haven't already. Don't worry that you're late to the show: Everything it's covered is still horrible to my knowledge!

[@mirabelmadrigal8956]

Brennan’s delivery through this whole thing is just gold. As hilarious as this is, it talk about real issues which is awesome. Grant made another spectacular one and Brennan delivered it with expertise!

[@arobbo28]

"I'm awake and I'm not going back to sleep" -- Brennan Lee Mulligan during college.

[@teaganreasch2071]

As a student at OSU, I have to laugh, the tradition surrounding the game, like crossing out the Ms, is pretty fun. But things like jumping in the lake have killed students and a lot of us don’t have substantial financial aid while Urban Meyer is highly paid.

[@cyclopsisbetterthanwolveri8651]

All of Brennan skits are amazing

[@thesunnygirl96ify]

Um, actually according to the description Grant wrote this but Brennan's delivery is superb.

[@BadgerMilkZeus]

Grant wrote it dud

[@fabiohaller5692]

Dude the one you see in the end who is saying goodbye is always the writer.

[@lesssugarcandy6011]

the one who write this was always the one in the outro and this time its not brennan

[@kingjamestres]

This is grants skit

[@paulinaenck5797]

Grant writes the best sketches. Well done as always!

[@ArmyofOneandaHalf]

I never noticed that they put the writer's credit in the description. Thanks for alerting me!

[@Tsukaiyo]

Ooooh so whoever is at the end of the video is the person who wrote it! Since the person that wrote it usually stars in it, I assumed that was just it.

[@ethanlivemere1162]

And Brennan does the best acting

[@beatnik09]

@@ethanlivemere1162 He's good, but I don't understand why everyone is always talking about how incredible he is. Every single cast member is incredible.

[@banu0245]

This one is really good but I don't remember anything else from Grant. Imo Trap is the best writer.

[@Saje3D]

I just found this. I DETEST American football, especially after so many “fans” decided the couldn’t bear a little commentary from the people putting their lives and bodies on the line for their entertainment. SILENT commentary, no less. I feel for and empathize with the athletes. I really do. We all want to do something we’re good at. And get paid for it. (College football is even more heinous, IMO). But there’s a reason I call football The Brain Damage Lottery.

[@INTERNATIONALvids]

I wouldn't call it a lottery. Brain damage is guaranteed

[@natecutler2012]

3:27 The way he said "There is no God" was too good

[@kingjamestres]

And the crazy thing is Americans have always known this deep down inside. Even before the actual study’s came out I mean it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to understand that smashing your body against another human being causes serious damage. One of the more famous stories of injuries is when a football player was paralyzed from the next down after taking a serious hit. That was before all the information came out about CTE which isn’t new information either. It’s a real dilemma because you could say it should go to the schools to help students but then comes the problem of profiting of others pain. This is why you need to pay the student athletes some of whom will never make it to the pros but will still have to live with the injuries.

[@jasondarkflame4948]

Adam is beginning to influence the normal content.

[@yambagels2927]

And it's not a bad thing. I'm sure Adam was there when they were coming up with this episode or something like that. I feel that the CH cast works really well with Adam, and I could definitely see him working behind the scenes.

[@chartypeplays2396]

Beginning? They've been doing this for a long time.

[@gorillaman283]

Adam truly does ruin everything.

[@ThatDrummaDave]

Holy shit. The subtle but earth shattering mic drop at the end. "up next a preview of Penn State." "oh Penn State? Talk about boys..." Did NOT expect this skit to end with a JoePa reference.

[@alecbyrd3031]

I wrote a paper about CTE and did PowerPoint and the things I learned from what happens to this players are both heartbreaking and horrifying

[@ChristopherLorde]

Is Brennan the new Adam?

[@dropout]

Have you ever seen them together in the same room?

[@Dionyboz]

Orange is new orange?

[@NovaTheSpaceWolf]

@@dropout Turns out Adam is running everything behind the scenes to inform everyone about things we get wrong on a daily basis, everyone else doesn't exist, it's just Adam in costumes acting.

[@lastnamefirstname8655]

@@dropout yes, actually. in one of the um, actually episodes, i think.

[@mrclueuin]

Good question! 👍

[@nitakrish9736]

the urban knew comment was everything!! as an ohio state student, i loved every second of this lmao

[@mitchellpinsky7114]

Same here!

[@MrAbomb234]

Damn I never thought I'd A) see my school in a collegehumor video and B) get such a great political quote from a collegehumor video

[@charleshautly4732]

2:52 chuck looks so proud

[@thatguyunknoe]

This is why I switched from football to boxing

[@faerlabaermar]

A sport that is honest about it's potential to do harm. "What did you expect? He climbed into a ring to get the shit punched out of him! This is literally a sport where people beat each other. THIS IS FIGHTING BUT WITH SCORES. WHY ARE YOU ALL SO SURPRISED HE DIED AT 65 FROM A DEGENERATIVE BRAIN CONDITION"

[@Vegas242]

Might as well do MMA at that point

[@lightgraph4060]

Ha ha

[@dont90know]

A related bit if information, boxing was banned from universities decades ago, because professors around the country stood up and said that they won't tolerate their students getting brain injuries in university sanctioned sports.

[@Motorata661]

@@Vegas242 Surprisingly MMA is actually safer, because the knockouts are faster, there is less rounds and there is a lot of submissions

[@dfgdfg_]

Social commentary comedy is sorely needed right now.

[@grankmisguided]

Social... commendry? ...idk, it feels like there's a portmanteau opportunity there that's slipping through my fingers

[@dfgdfg_]

@@grankmisguided a double entendre just tapped me on the shoulder and told me it agrees with you

[@Preston_Hudson]

Nah there’s plenty of it on snl and tonight shows, imo it’s just rare to find any legitimately funny like this vid👌

[@williamcondon7729]

It's inconvenient for you. I get it

[@nonamefound9296]

I mean Adam has been doing it for years now...

[@eloryosnak4100]

The genuine insanity to me is that Rugby is like 10 times better for you, and practically the same game (im painting in broad strokes I know) And yet the US refuses to either take notes or start switching over

[@ql8ll]

I love this. I've thought about these things before but they put it all together in this sketch so eloquently.

[@1barl2barl]

😂😂😂CHUCK PUBER😂😂😂

[@m1k3y48]

With names like that, I thought this was going to be one of the "they don't know whats on the teleprompter" episodes! Turns out it was even better than that

[@querglh1696]

😂😂😂 WHO DID THIS??😂😂😂

[@ianl.h1152]

Lol that’s a pee pee name

[@arsenelupin123]

Wealthy billionaires profit off the physical health of young boys, but somehow we're the out of touch elitists for wanting an avocado sandwich.

[@achanwahn]

Gladiators of modern history. Are you not entertained?!

[@Adamdidit]

gladiators got paid

[@snoopy_peanuts_77]

@@Adamdidit "Is the choice between abject poverty and bodily harm really any choice at all?"

[@floncer]

I love how some comments are "how does Brennan keep a straight face". He was reaaaally close at 4:13 though

[@Nathankinamorh]

Handicapped for rest of life, for a highschool game.

[@mitchellmartinez9510]

That's why we shouldn't play sports

[@sleeplessdistrict3897]

Mitchell Martinez Well a lot of sports are great and increase activity in youth. I personally don’t like them but I find exercise in other ways, As long as their not permanently damaging to the players it should be fun

[@2isinwinning431]

Man as someone who played football jesus I dodge a missile made out of sharks and bears some of the injuries you hear about make me disgusted with the sport don't get me wrong I love playing football but not at that cost.

[@ScottFentonfullbe6]

Bravo. Brilliant. The last line totally caught me off guard. Nailed it!

[@christiankrenek7689]

Amazing sketch, Grant! Funny and informative simultaneously. You’re the best! :D

[@syafranmuflih7139]

I bet Adam emailed that article to Chuck first

[@Drapsmann-kn2hb]

Adam ghost wrote this

[@GulfsideMinistries]

BTW - this has been my favorite CH skit to date. Good job, Grant!

[@BH-if4pi]

i come back to this video every year. it's just so great.

[@twingemios5139]

oh boy...

[@sabreslav]

This is one of CH's best sketches ever. A+ on the script, hope more discussion and change happens regarding the sport as a whole

[@VulpeculaJoy]

college football - a word where a higher educational institution is followed by the unhealthiest sport for brains - I have never seen a bigger oxymoron

[@neegas3490]

Omg

[@anaxa4883]

The word college in the US has an increasingly less oxymoronic meaning as they are more and more becoming capitalist vocational institutions.

[@mickmulcahy7256]

Its really not though

[@DBZHGWgamer]

@@anaxa4883 It seems like you neither known what capitalist nor vocational means. 2 years ago, we were a very small number of votes away from having government pay for college in full. Thats not what capitalism is.

[@SovietReunionYT]

DivideByZero, neither the center-left-ish Bernie nor the centrist Hillary were even remotely likely to seriously push back against capitalism. You haven't had a serious socialist candidate in so long that you have no concept of government ownership of the means of production anymore.

[@samtrotter7177]

Absolutely fantastic! Reminds me of the Key and Peele "Teaching Center" sketch

[@TheDUDERulez1]

Oh, come on! They're just slav--I mean "student ath-o-letes." 😉

[@auroraseekins8429]

TheDUDERulez1 is this South Park

[@greatshaman0724]

u are right, they are just slavs

[@AndySunshine1291]

The twist that this was a Grant video was really nice. He's really good at utilizing the cast's strengths.

[@ColieBear18]

Have an anticlassist rant in a script? Immediately Brennan lol

[@OurFoundingLiars]

The truth? Football is a hologram. Keep asking questions

[@kimlit058]

Wow you’ve really fallen off the grid huh?

[@PlanetaryPluto]

There Is No Ball. Wake Up And Fight The Machines.

[@kanazak2]

For some reason I initially read "Football is a hooligan."

[@stellam8936]

Reality is an illusion, the universe is a hologram, buy gold. Bye!

[@jibbs_aim]

Username checks out

[@anone.mousse674]

It's halftime at The Game. Pour one out for These Boys.

[@xygdra]

Ohh so much Last Week Tonight sarcasm vibes and info dump here. Love it!

[@hannahm3093]

This sketch is honestly perfect, the actual facts they’re bring up and the announcer fine they have through the whole thing makes me crack up

[@PharaohMisa]

I'm awake and I'm not going back to sleep. I'm SCREAMING

[@tempest2711]

Gosh I love this video, the deadpan is so solid

[@vladtheimpaler9577]

4:30 That head shake is so adorable.

[@vesperiadragon3221]

Probably the 8th time I've come back to this video. Very well done, and one of the best from College Humor. Plz do more No Laugh News!!

[@Ben-vt8ne]

What do non-sports fans do instead of watching sports? Watch the same KZbin video 8 times. Fun existence.

[@vesperiadragon3221]

@@Ben-vt8ne See? You get me

[@kovassb7050]

“Penn state? Oh talk about boys” that one was ruthless

[@mitchellmartinez9510]

i like the use of quotes from outside sources, makes it sound so well researched.

[@warrenrobinson527]

I’m dumbfounded, the ad that ran on this video was a directTV advert showcasing their new plan to make football more available on demand, what impeccable tone deftness

[@kenanschwoebel8626]

"Urban knew."

[@Booster37]

He knew the whole time.

[@nb7216]

@@Booster37 you guys realize they found out in court that she was lying

[@Booster37]

Do you realize we're just quoting the sketch?

[@nb7216]

@@Booster37 ok? Doesnt make it right.

[@Booster37]

I haven't found anything online to even confirm what you just said. I have however found him (not Urban, but the former assistant that I assume you're talking about) mocking other coaches wives from his twitter account. So that's interesting.

[@wompusslompus5424]

This feels extremely relevant today in light of Demar Hamlin.