Fearful Avoidants & Chronic Guilt and Shame | How to Heal!

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Unleash your full potential and break free from guilt and shame - Enroll in the course, Eliminate Your Inner Guilt & Shame, now to eliminate inner burdens, embrace abundance, and experience transformative growth in your life!
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In this video, Thais Gibson reveals the costs associated with chronically shaming yourself and the potential origins of why you, as a fearful avoidant attachment style (disorganized attachment style), may be prone to chronic guilt and shame.
Watch now to find out the root causes as Thais offers up some guidance and useful tips that you can apply today. For more information check out the course, Eliminate Your Inner Guilt & Shame so you can heal and work towards becoming securely attached!
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00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:12 - Chronic Guilt and Shame: Where Does It Come From?
00:02:34 - Perfectionism
00:03:13 - Enmeshment
00:04:34 - Cluster B Parent
00:05:36 - Look At What It's Costing You
00:08:21 - How Often Do You Guilt and Shame Yourself?
00:11:00 - Look At the Root Cause
00:12:08 - Summary
00:12:27 - 7-Day Free Trial: Chronic Guilt and Shame Course
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Hey there! I'm Thais Gibson, and this is the channel where I teach you how to transform your life.
I created the Personal Development School, an online learning platform that gives users the ability to create true and long-lasting change in their lives through personal development courses that are designed to give you a breakthrough in every area of your life, with a 99.7% satisfaction rate.
Our KZbin videos give you a glimpse into this in-depth course content. Much of what you'll learn here is based on your attachment style and how that affects the relationships you have with your family, friendships, and of course, your romantic relationships.
So what are you waiting for? This could be the start of your personal development journey. Subscribe to our channel and start watching!
#PersonalDevelopmentSchool #ThaisGibson #PDS #AttachmentStyles #FearfulAvoidant #FearfulAvoidantAttachment #FearfulAvoidantCourse #GuiltAndShameCourse

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

FA's can you relate to this chronic guilt and shame?

[@martita1205]

I do, but it took me a while to understand that the feeling I was feeling was shame actually...

[@lucytownsend1176]

Yes and Yes 😩

[@monicamonica5924]

Yes 😒

[@lauraschleifer4721]

Literally the story of my life, hah.

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

@@martita1205 Thank you for sharing

[@hotpotato4023]

I’m an FA in recovery and watched hundreds of your videos in the last 2 weeks. I’ve learned an unbelievable amount about myself so far. I’m so grateful for your existence ❤

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

wow, thanks for such a nice post! Truly glad you're getting such good value from the channel :) Thanks for watching! ❤

[@daniellec4728]

@hotpotato4023 how did you recover? I've been in therapy for 10 months and still struggle 2 out of 3 days

[@purplewitchtarotanddivinat5680]

@@daniellec4728 Deep breathing everyday, grounding everyday throughout the day, and learning how to just sit with my uncomfortable feelings without reacting helped me a lot, personally

[@hotpotato4023]

@@daniellec4728 I’m definitely not recovered yet. But I feel hopeful. I was raised by a covert narcissist father and a incredibly codependent and manipulative mother. My healing journey began 10 years ago. I was on antidepressants but therapy didn’t work for me. What worked was learning in depth about my parents and my childhood first. That gave me very good understanding of my psychology at the time and helped me put the past behind me to a great extent. After that it took me about 2 years to get from -100 to zero. I’m still struggling with maintaining positive relationships but I’ve gotten so much better. I feel like a normal human being and I’m very kind to myself. A few things that helped were constantly educating myself, journaling and getting away from toxic people and environments. Surround yourself with kind and healthy people. I wish you all the best 🤗

[@anthi-mariakouvatsou8746]

Me too. The last few days I started watching the videos and I have already made deep and important changes in my behavioural patterns. These videos are amazing

[@VeronicaMartini]

As a FA I recognised all the patterns. It's like that,and if you are failing people won't love you (that's how I feel) so it's really hard to get out from this loop because we're craving love and understanding.

[@Calicokitty2]

I just realized this last week that shame about making any mistake and thus perfectionism are ruining my life. This video right now is an answer to prayer and explains exactly what I was asking! I've got to start that course! Thank you! You give me hope.

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

You got this Virginia! This is fixable ❤

[@amandadyck9347]

I'm a recovering FA. And I never feel satisfied with my friendships because I have a tendency to take on the caregiver role, which I feel happy to do, but it gets to a point where I don't feel seen or really known by anyone. Much less understood. And I recognize it's my own fault. It's really hard to let others see the more intimate parts of me. And when I do, it only seems to weigh me down. I also really struggle being honest with people when the truth might hurt them. Even though I'm hurting them more by holding it back. I don't really know how to "be myself", interaction with people feels more like a performance from my side, like I'm reading off of a script. I cannot stand the thought of being disliked by someone, when I feel like someone doesn't really like me much, it disturbs me more than it should. And I feel guilty about that. I relate SO much to "not seeing yourself as human", not giving myself the room to make necessary mistakes, so I also feel kinda behind in life, or immature in some ways. I love your videos, they're helpful and also I feel like it's one of the only ways I can feel validated and understood, without risking feeling shamed or neglected by others, even if they don't mean any harm. Sorry for the kind of random rant. Thank you for your work

[@ashton1952]

❤

[@Sabreemeplease]

Sending you love. I just related to your entire comment 💕

[@CarmenMoses-ey1eh]

100% relate❤@Amanda

[@ghostparty6877]

I struggle with perfectionism

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

I know it can be challenging, but you can heal from this! Thanks for sharing ❤

[@ghostparty6877]

@@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool thank you!❤️‍🩹

[@martita1205]

Thais, thanks so much for your content! This is really helpful! Could you make a video on oversharing as trauma response? That would really help!

[@finetrue]

Thank you for the great content. For my whole life, I had no concept of “self”. I was a perfect daughter, sister, wife, mom, and I put everyone before myself until I exhausted myself and my health broke down. When I could not further advance my career achievements, I lost the value of “self” for my parents. When I was depressed and sick, I lost the value of “self” for my family. After 7 years, I finally learned to face my own needs, heal my body and mind, bring myself to the front row to survive. But deep down, the guilt and shame of not being able to meet everyone else’s needs is always there. It is so natural and easy to ignore myself, and it requires constant mindful control to deal with the anxiety caused by such guilt and shame.

[@musebymelissa8583]

I did the exact same thing, and my health is wrecked as a result too. This tendency to ignore myself feels so natural, whereas taking care of myself leaves me with so much guilt and then I sorta self sabotage. The struggle is real. Thanks for your comment tho - it gives me some peace knowing I'm not the only one dealing with these challenges.

[@koala01111986]

I was a perfectionist and then I understood that you can't be always perfect and you are allowed to make mistakes and f**k whoever thinks you are not good enough 😉

[@TremendousTessa]

Thank you Thais for your daily breakthrough videos, I have been watching your channel for about 3 years and check in every single day, to learn, be inspired and to connect. Whatever I learn from the daily video, I reflect on during the day. Every topic seems to be relevant in some form. The KZbin videos are a very useful summary and reminder of the PDS courses. I particularly like in this video how personable you are, how you encourage the watchers to not only learn from the content but to reflect, and to be compassionate to oneself.

[@joshliam1967]

As an FA who constantly lives with guilt and shame I appreciate this video so much. Thank you to everyone who helps make this channel exist!

[@roshalllambert]

The looking at costs point is so good!!

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Thanks San ❤

[@divineradiancewisdom]

So incredibly validating ❤

[@JacobCarlson-uq1my]

A journal sounds like a lovely idea❤️⚽️

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

❤

[@divineradiancewisdom]

You’re literally so amazing Thais I can’t tell you how gifted you are. Idk how you discovered all this info but wow !!! Life changing

[@mistakesweremade6771]

Spot on.

[@bxmully]

Thank you!

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

You're very welcome ❤

[@PLad-pr9cl]

Yes it does make a whole lot of sense, thank you so much dear Thais ❤️

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

You're welcome ❤

[@abbywoolfson584]

I have not been able to work through this. I didn't know where the root was from. Again the information I'm learning eluvates the guilt and shamel having the information.

[@koala01111986]

I can see myself in many many FA videos, sometimes completely, sometimes just some parts...but I can see my ex completely in every video 😢😢 even here about guilt and shame

[@so_onan]

everything you say is very interesting, thank you for that! what a shame that you speak soooo fast. the content is quite dense, also for people learning from what you say, it would benefit of some breathing.

[@_Slay_laziness_]

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[@paulpelham3979]

These may need a trigger warning 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂