THIS Is Why Men & Women Are Single... (TOXIC!) | Courtney Ryan

In this video, I react to some TikToks (mainly about dating) and try to give a healthier, more balanced perspective.
4 Tips On How To Approach Women (WITHOUT BEING CREEPY!)
• 4 Tips On How To Appro...
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Instagram: @courtneycristineryan
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[@graymatters7584]

When I was much younger, I dated a rich gal from Mexico City. She lost interest in me at some point, and she told me why. She said I needed to play games better. She said I should call her every day for a few days, then deliberately NOT call one day to make her wonder - keep her off-balance. I mourned the loss of that relationship for about 30 minutes, but never heeded her advice. It never seemed like a recipe for finding the right girl for me. I am what I am. Eventually, I found the one who appreciated what I am. We've been together 36 years.

[@Kevin09210]

Typical latina woman 🤣

[@brendantjeerdsma492]

Amen brother! Glad you found the right woman for you

[@velvet123]

That’s sad - that’s a girl not a woman. Keep it moving. A men being consistent is a good green flag.

[@rodneyc3202]

These women.... they don’t want peace 😂😂😂

[@gbd-oq1rz]

Those women hate themselves and they want that hate from other. They like any attention bad or good. Yes that’s is a adult female but an immature soul on the inside

[@hagberry6477]

I don't know why people prefer to play mind games when it comes to relationships. If you like / don't like someone, just be direct about it!

[@kc270352]

people love manipulation

[@CourtneyRyan]

Totally agree

[@ghostflame9211]

If only it were that easy

[@hagberry6477]

@@ghostflame9211 For me, it is easy. My current bf approached me reluctantly, but I liked him, so I told him. Nine months in and we're still crazy for each other. I won't trade him for anything.

[@andoverb1307]

Thank you I wish more people were like you.

[@travis6694]

It’s almost like who can manipulate the best to win control these days.

[@agentm83]

Basically, a lot of relationships out there seem to be based on manipulation - it sucks.

[@Rick_Cleland]

@@agentm83 😔😔😔

[@Rick_Cleland_II]

​@@Rick_Cleland Stop whining!!

[@END-THE-FED]

Yes it’s true, many relationships are toxic these days. MANY!

Twas always thus, and always thus shall be.

[@MelbaOzzie]

Some time ago I was working at a part time job while in college. One day, as I arrived at work, I passed a female coworker in the parking lot and complemented her on the blouse she was wearing. Later that afternoon, I was called into HR and informed that I had been "rude, insulting and sexist". I quit on the spot.

[@tomz818]

For real?!

[@qjtvaddict]

Smart move get away from that toxic situation

[@andyp91]

Good move taking the exit . Still, you had to know that calling out a blouse means you're looking at her chest and you have no idea how she would take that. Some women would enjoy the compliment and others...? Well that's who you got. I'm guessing you're not 6 foot tall.

[@Cantetinza17]

I always tell my male friends. If it's a coworker that you talk to on occasion then give the disclaimer, "I'm not trying to hit on you, but I think your blouse is pretty". Don't say, I think your blouse looks nice on you". The ON YOU might seem creepy to a female depending on their perspective, even saying "Nice Blouse" could make a women think that it's because you can see her nipples through the shirt or something crazy like that. If it's someone that you hang out with after work a lot then hopefully you know your boundaries when it comes to compliments, so it shouldn't be an issue as long as you maintain the boundaries set. If you have never spoken to this coworker then don't compliment them at all. Just think it.

[@mimicotom]

It happened to me. I told my female s/v that she was looking good and had a nice dress. Told everyone I was a perv. I could care less as I could retire yesterday. I got transferred away from her 2 months later. Then I retired.

[@Jediknight4jc]

Just to add to your point about that last girl, if a man will cheat with you, then he will cheat on you. The same can be said for men. I don't understand why so many people fail to realize that cheaters are going to cheat?

[@CourtneyRyan]

THIS! 🙌🏼 so true and it happens every time, like clockwork…. and then they’re surprised they got cheated on? What did you expect 😂 *sigh*

[@thecowboy9698]

I believe people tend to live in a state of denial quite often, they think: "That can't happen to me, that's for other people.", when that's just not true. Bad things can happen to you, and oftentimes will, if you put yourself in a situation where it could happen. The best thing to do is always be prudent, stop and think before you act or react.

[@Nighhhts]

@@thecowboy9698 💯

[@justhimo2728]

guys I don't like the cheated ones they have black hearts 🦥💔

[@Nighhhts]

@@thecowboy9698 I know I responded a month ago, but your last sentence is crucial in any and every situation in life. All it takes is one mistake to ruin bonds, relationships, families, and even one mistake could lead to your death. Everything is a choice, and we must all be wise in our decision-making, regardless of the situation at hand.

[@HanzoMishima]

I'm not going to lie. Giving a genuine compliment with a random question while passing has worked a lot for me. The woman doesn't necessarily come find you, but it does make them more receptive because you are showing genuine interest in a natural way without coming across thirsty, overbearing, or awkward.

[@salmarnir92]

That’s good advice

[@andrebaxter4023]

Same here man. It's all about being genuine and also having good sensory acuity. I'll stick around and talk to her and shoot my shot if she's showing interest. If she looks uninterested, then I'll kindly cut the conversation and walk away.

[@dimex3362]

Thats the morgan freeman game. Basically give them a compliment and show your interest… then keep it moving. Lots of women will become more receptive to a direct advance after having laid that foundation. In other words, they may make eye contact further down the line and show you choosing signals/interest. Of course, some wont. And morgan freeman basically said you just kick back and see which women take the bait and start showing interest. Donr worry about the ones that dont. He basically called it a cheat code.

[@andoverb1307]

I do not believe approaching a random woman you do not know is a good idea, it almost never works. Women need social proof and they are biologically afraid of stranger men. A woman has to know the man first, so no this is not going to work ever, besides that's manipulation technique, and quite honestly running away from the rejection so nothing manly about it. I say chase excellence men, don't ask random women out its a waste of your energy.

[@jimbrown3436]

@@andoverb1307 Alot of the men who watch Courtney are simps.

[@modalsoul6511]

The key 🔑 to a great relationship……RECIPROCITY…..Give What You Get.

[@thefox47545]

Yeah, in my experience in relationships, just like almost everything in life, if you get less that what you put in, you start to lose interest, and rightfully so. The classic ROI.

[@philyeary8809]

Where does it live?

[@modalsoul6511]

@Nathan Crowther nope …RECIPROCITY… GIVE WHAT YOU GET👍🏼

[@richardsalinetrojr1957]

Sounds like some advice a 18yrd me could've used 26yrs ago. Lmfao. fresh out of high school I met a 27yrd female that had 2 kids and had a killer body and was fun to be around. idk why she was interested in me being younger and not having much to my name other than a car and a job but we ended up hanging out a lot being that she was living next to a buddy of mine. she said she got a divorce from a abusive husband which was why she moved back home with her parents. didn't really think much about it but after about 6 months of dating im thinking it's gonna last longer than i ever thought so I started working harder better jobs in order to give my all to keep her and her kids all happy. moved in together btw not knowing she was legally still married. long story short I found out that while I was out busting my ass to keep a roof over her and her kids heads and to keep them happy she was out taking other guys up her ass, literally. well I'm assuming she did that with them cause she enjoyed the hell out of it with me. lmfao. needless to say we split and found out she had moved back with her husband. after 26yrs now I have no idea what ever happened to her.

[@tayloryork8185]

"Play stupid games, win stupid prizes." I love that so much.

[@janpauledwarddedios5366]

I don't know what is scarier people who post these tik tok or people who believe it.

[@CourtneyRyan]

Both 😂

[@janpauledwarddedios5366]

@@CourtneyRyan altho that one girl has a super clean toilet- she needs to make a tik tok video on that..

[@HitmanAfricanSeries]

Courtney thanks for this. When I was dating I met a girl, we were exclusive I thought, then I found out I was an option for her. I was a volunteer coach and I found out the university that I coach at she was hooking up with a guy on the basketball team. My players all knew about it. When I cut her off and met my wife, she was hurt by that and told me she did that because of her trust issues. I'm not paying for someone else mistake. Fast forward 7 years later I have been married for 5 years with two beautiful kids and an amazing wife. I bump into her here and there and u can see she's hurting but that's what happen when u play games. She became the game and got played

[@patrickstogsdill74]

@EdHitman series heavens yes dude I'm glad you stayed on your course and she got played

[@joebeta1837]

Score one for the guys!!

[@IsraelCountryCube]

she cheated from the start and got what she needed. she did it to herself she wasnt hurt by you breaking up with her that her regretting cheating on you because she realized the man she cheated with isnt all that great as neither is she. interesting how this all happened. everyone has a story thanks for telling it!

[@tjjordan4207]

If she has trust issues, then she's the one who needs help. Consider that a bullet dodged.

[@tommygunn6901]

That first girl saying to compliment and walk away....no girl will hunt you down afterwards, that's total BS! She's gonna be taken back by it at the very least, not what he said, but his actions alone

[@ghostflame9211]

Right lol maybe if you were a chad but not for the average joe

[@bunnyboo6295]

They likely won't if your passing a stranger your not going to see again but if its a friends party or work you would likely pass again and a few times doing it could build up to them starting a conversation.

[@Cantetinza17]

Yeah no, Unless the girl is MAD THIRSTY, like she is on the brink of DEHYDRATION, she will not put her toes through torture in her high heels trying to track you down.

[@masterofdisaster492]

She's talking to Chad/Tyrone .. the other 80% of the guys will be labeled a creep

[@matthattermatador4595]

Any woman that uses the word creep is immediately and irrevocably dead to me. If it came down to saving Ted Bundy or the woman who called me the creep; I’m saving Ted Bundy… every time.

[@vikingshark2634]

This is just her asking that validation from all men continue, without having to do any actual work to reject everyone except Chad.

[@acb723]

Who hurt you guys ?!!! SERIOUSLY. The whole " chad & tyrone" thing is sooo fucking stupid 🤣🤣😂😂.

[@FPSIreland2]

@@matthattermatador4595and you still don’t realise why women think you’re a creep? You’re a lost cause mate

[@fizahaque]

I am a girl and i never thought her audience is 95% men lmao but i always applied her advice to myself. But you're right. I find that it's just this generation where I have no idea how, but i look at my fellow 20's and all i can see is people just hooking up, using eachother, 50/50, playing mind games... Like what is happening...? And i am over here just thinking after many failed dates; ''You know what, i think no one has morals or values anymore... I am good grinding on my own and have a career till i find the right man. In the meantime imma focus on myself." I don't get how sleeping around is so so casual these days??? for both genders??? Like where did the intimacy go??? What about true love??? Or am i living in a fantasy world in my head? It's hard to stay positive in this dating scene... I am just glad I can see my parents grow old together and really caring for eachother. That definitely gives me hope. But the guys commenting down below, y'all are making me cry man

[@derekleventritt4288]

Those good men could be your guy friends. Best of luck.

[@fizahaque]

@@derekleventritt4288 You wouldn’t believe your eyes but you’re actually right. A guy friend of mine for years called Darek is now my boyfriend. What a coincidence indeed 😂

[@studleyjb3172]

If you haven't heard from someone, you could always inquire into the state of their health.

[@divineprovidence803]

Yes we do exist. Not every man wants casual hook ups.

[@alancook9102]

"We should not be outsourcing our happiness." Excellent. Your one liners are so on the point. Sharp thinking., "You are what you do." Another great one. That's your trade mark."

[@hrobky]

"Play stupid games, win stupid prizes", love it!

[@scottclark3761]

As a married man of many years, honest, clear communication is key. It is almost the enitre deal. Like....80% of a relationship is communication. Maybe more. And we had to learn how to argue. How to fight, and resolve the fight. How to get along. How to deal with things going bad. And, more importantly, how to deal with things going well. That one can screw with your head if you're not paying attention. That's where all the past traumas come to light, and you become your own worst enemy. The other part is trying to make sure your communication is being received correctly. Communication is a two part process. Transmitting the message and receiving the message. So communicate is your partner's language a bit. We all have a slightly different perception, and, ergo, a slightly different way of communicating....a slightly different language. Learn your partner's language. And yes, FFS, if you want to play games, break out some Yahtzee or something. Don't do that in your relationships.

She taught you well.

[@seymorepencilart]

Great comment! I’ve had to learn the exact same things.

[@SinsOfScience]

This video was the first time I ever came across the phrase, "We should not be outsourcing our happiness." Thank you for that.

[@KeyEpic]

Really good advice!! Yes most of them are doing it for views and clicks

[@jtfritz9169]

For me, whenever I see a cute chick, I’m so afraid to go up to her and ask her out. And whenever I do (only been a few times), I’ve gotten rejected.

[@CourtneyRyan]

A lot of people feel this way and then the rejection just intensifies it! You’re not alone in feeling that way but when you change your mindset around it, it really helps 🙌🏼 won’t know unless you try!

[@lanikinlywalker4596]

Because you're expecting and depending on the desired outcome of going out with her. Change the mindset of "you're trying to convince her to like you" to "you interviewing her to see if you like her". Going up to someone to talk to them and being rejected is 100x better than being too scared to and not taking the chance at all

[@lanikinlywalker4596]

@Jeremy Dionisio this is fair and a totally fine lifestyle. All I can say is I wouldn't be as determined now if it weren't for my breakups and divorce. It brought me financial ruin, extreme heartbreak and the loss of my kids growing up in a stable home... I hit rock bottom last year but this caused me to look inward at what I want and where I can be in life. I've been a lot riskier and getting out of my comfort zone (with women, hobbies and money). A year later and I'm better off than I ever was. I can't even be bothered with the hookup culture. At first I thought it would help after my breakup but it lost its appeal quickly but at least I know what I'm looking for and expect from a partner. Boundaries and standards have increased for sure. Best of luck to everyone out there doing this game of life

[@Kickback-dm7zt]

Same here but I have woken up.. Don't worry about it.. Just think of how many bullets you have dodged.

[@primeobjective5469]

Stop idolizying women. Until you do, you will always have a scarcity mindset, live in fear, and be a SIMP. Focus on self-improvement with an abundance mindset and you will never fear anyone, ever again.

[@austinherzog8465]

I’ve had the compliment and walk away thing work for me so many times because it drives girls crazy when they have a guy who’s completely content with complimenting but not thirst for them.

[@NANA-su5ql]

Idk for me it’s that I don’t like feeling cornered and pressured into a response? Like I’ve had dudes basically pin me to a wall and wouldn’t let me leave to try and flirt with me while I was just trying to do my job. Walking away let’s the person know that they’re not gonna be stuck trying to reason with a stranger why they don’t wanna date them.

[@Mark.remarking]

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes? That's fantastic Courtney. it actually made me laugh out loud

[@Rick_Cleland]

TikTok is _literally_ The Devil! THE DEVIL!!

[@CourtneyRyan]

👹

[@stevec3526]

Its where the unhinged hang out...

Pretty boys got the attention there, I think it's a different game for those with good facial structure and some makeup if I'm not reading it wrong.

[@narcvanquisher]

Nah, thats Vicky Valencort

[@nickelsworth7097]

Cancer

[@Trizzer89]

"a lot of girls are into guys that they know are not good for them" And this is exactly why guys "treat em mean". Because it works better than anything else

[@NANA-su5ql]

Nah that quote says way more about the person using it than actual women’s opinions. And there’s also a big divide between fantasy and reality in what someone wants romantically.

[@coopclauson]

I've definitely been approached by women in the past, going back to high school. It almost never happens "cold," it's usually a matter of being in an existing milieu with them, like a class, or a work environment. And generally what they do is just start talking to you about things and make it very obvious that they're interested, they don't ask you out directly or anything.

[@Cantetinza17]

I do. I'm just someone that values my time and I just want to get the answer or move on. I'm short and thick, so I know that there is a 40% chance depending on who they are, or think they are, or if they are alone, or with their friends that they'll accept.

[@GEORGIOARCADE]

Courtney is like " you are gonna watch these tik toks with me now!😤" HAHAHA 😂. Now to be real with that first girl said; i like the idea being bold with a genuine compliment and ask her day is going. If her response is positive; she will continue the interaction. It definitely can be a daunting task approaching women these days. I like what the guy said in the 2nd tik tok. My grandma always say a close mouth don't get fed. So you gotta speak up and your advice has greatly helped me Courtney. It was fun watching these with you. Take care♥️

[@CourtneyRyan]

🙌🏼❤️ thanks Georgio!

[@studleyjb3172]

Oh, God, forced to watch tictok.

[@thefox47545]

I've had women ask me out. Unfortunately I wasn't interested in any of them. BUT, I still gave them a date because I admired their ambition and to see if maybe "sparks would fly". Unfortunately again, no second date for any of them, just not interested, no sparks. But it was still REALLY NICE to be asked out.

[@machupikachu1085]

I've done the same. It does feel nice to be approached. Women get this kind of attention 1000% more than us as well. Must be nice lol

[@antonboludo8886]

8:30 - "Outsourcing our happiness". Well said. This is a modern way of saying that one should not depend on someone else to take care of one's emotional well-being.

[@itsenergybob8917]

It's nice to hear a woman's point of view that's logical and objective. A beautiful and soothing voice too.

[@marinab.8590]

For the people out there online dating, if the person is never available on Friday/ Saturday to go out with you, he/she is probably going out with someone else. If he/she is always giving you excuses or cancels the dates he/She is probably using you as a back up. If the person arrived extremely late to the date and no explanation was given, that person is probably coming from another date... but if the person communicates with you and gives you an explanation even though you didn’t ask for one, and that person actually works weekends but would like to see you during the week then that person does like you. Just my two cents...

[@rjames7380]

If your interested in an relationship. Take a step back and simply observe from the sidelines for awhile. Put yourself in the 'friend zone' and you're going to quietly and quickly see how they treat the people around there world. Won't be long to realize if you want to step up your game or if you dodged a bullet. If marriage is for life yet divorce exists at such a high ratio... Then playing the long game may be of high benefit to those in the sport

[@superwormhalz2607]

The approach of complement and then leaving can be good for first impression but don't expect the girl to chase you. It should be used so that the girl does not feel immediate pressure but now has a positive memory of you. Once people are aware of something they become more comfortable with it and feel like they are making their own decisions. But that first impression has to be followed up by more positive impressions to reinforce a feeling.

[@andyp91]

Exactly

[@milforddekalb6429]

That first impression is a lasting impression.

[@hagakuru]

STOP validating women! Geezuz - going up to a woman and just saying "you look great" and walking away is the same BETA SIMP BS as leaving fire emojis on IG. STOP IT!

[@pounddog77]

Exactly! 💯

Agreed. Time to quit them and their games. Us chasing has punished us far too long.

[@axk6047]

valid point.

[@pounddog77]

“Stop it! Get some help!” Michael Jordan

[@Cantetinza17]

They can compliment, but start a conversation. There is no harm in starting a conversation sometimes that is what gets the date, and if not then no biggie it was hopefully a great exchange of words.

[@RS-xo7rd]

Great video,Courtney. Your words of wisdom and straightforward opinions are so refreshing and helpful. Thank you.

[@mattwisher6899]

I appreciate the wholesome advice from Ms. Ryan. Very cool…more voices like hers can only help.

[@williamsporing1500]

Yea, she seems sweet and genuine. Kind of scares me…..can’t be real

[@Shah-of-the-Shinebox]

As a single guy, I cannot express just how hard it can be to approach a girl. You have to catch certain signals.

[@BobSmith-tg5lg]

It's easier to approach them when you quit putting them on a pedestal.

[@Shah-of-the-Shinebox]

@@BobSmith-tg5lg good point

[@gaymagician]

Thank you so much big sis for another great video!!!! I always leave your videos feeling inspired, motivated, and educated. In this insane world its so easy to fall in the mindset that you’re crazy and you need to do/say certain things in order to achieve in an end results. You clear not only those toxic advice but humanize my emotions. Defog my brain. And paint clarity in this ever fuzzy world!

[@gaymagician]

Big sis lil sis* since you’re 25 and I’m 30 🤣

[@totallypluggedin]

Great advice Courtney, you’ve got a really effective way of sweetly and thoughtfully giving wisdom that I think is good for men and women!

[@eduardocaro381]

Hi Courtney! My respect to you. Wish there was more healthy people like you on this planet. Great videos. Hope this helps shine some light to persons with these toxic mindsets. Thank you and congrats to your channel👍🏻👍🏻

[@rickscott2004]

Courtney, I’m way too old to really be part of the conversation but I have to say, you are so heads up and I can’t agree with all your content more! Keep up the good work, I wish this stuff was around when I needed it most!

[@michaelmartin7190]

Courtney, I genuinely appreciate your positive female perspective and insight. Thank you, and please keep doing what you're doing. You're amazing. We all need to remember to just be kind

[@shakiralinda558]

So refreshing Courtney. Love your channel especially after leaving two toxic relationships and just blaming myself for the entire relationships.

[@antonboludo8886]

1:47 - I have seen it a few times, and it has happened to me a couple of times, but overall this is still very rare. Women are the flowers and men are the bees. As they say in French "L' homme propose, la femme dispose.'', which means that the man usually makes the first move and then the woman either accepts or refuses.

[@malakbrood667]

Exactly. This is very unusual. In spanish would be: El hombre propone y la mujer dispone. That chick on the first video is delusional.

[@antonboludo8886]

@@malakbrood667 Yes, she is.

[@lucianoben-malek693]

With people like Courtney we can turn this whole franchise around! It's my hope that even if it takes a while this whole toxic ideology about dating and society in general will change for the better 🙂

[@CourtneyRyan]

That’s the dream!

[@lucianoben-malek693]

@@CourtneyRyan It can still happen!

[@farihamohamedhilmy4700]

I happen to like this video for some reason. There are so many great highlights Courtney mentioned such as calling out women who are the cause of home wrecking other people’s relationships especially those who are married. Because yes, these people have insecurity issues and are seen as desperate, I totally agree 💯💯 Another thing I would agree on is we should observe how people treat us instead of thinking these people are what they say. These people are defined by their actions not words 💯💯

[@erik2142new]

Courtney always hitting me straight in the heart with some of these. The last one about home wreckers is literally what just happened to me recently.

[@1dancier]

Romance happened in my day, wasn't hard, mostly no games, but we didn't have apps to play on. Love the physcology of modern dating. Never knew anything about validation until recently, but can see the simps at work dishing it out to the young girls in hope that they get lucky. Your content is down to earth and balanced, you're got a winning formula.

[@PRdude]

I hated getting crap about people complaining about me not talking to girls, when those girls could have easily talked to me. I get that the guy is expected to do most of the work, but the girls do have voices too.

[@CourtneyRyan]

For sure. It’s frustrating!

[@Coyote-wm5op]

Been there. My friends get fear of rejection confused with not wasting my time with rejection anymore. Sounds negative but it’s reality. Trying the same thing over and over, changing how you do the same thing over and over, you eventually realize the diminishing returns.

[@derekvazquezz3067]

Free validation = simp/friend zone. Cold approach has 90%+ failure rate.

[@machupikachu1085]

Still better odds than cold-call sales...

[@seymorepencilart]

This was one of your best Tiktok react videos. I like that you had some men telling people not to put up with, or engage in, manipulative behavior/tactics.

[@opiealvin]

I bet Courtney gets told that she is wise beyond her years alot. I get told that alot too. People always say to me, "Are you sure you're only 31 because you say stuff that old people say." I just laugh it off. Because advice you get from older folks is generally far more sound than the stuff you hear young people spewing.

[@CourtneyRyan]

Lol I totally relate to this! 🙌🏼

[@kwong4579_]

31 is old.

[@kaiung7542]

@@kwong4579_ Yeah I'm 30 and I'm old

[@AmazianLinsation82]

@@kwong4579_ try 39, i look 30 but gets screened out on all dating apps due to age criterion.

[@kaiung7542]

@@AmazianLinsation82 You're old af

[@stephenpatchett2089]

one of your best vids, a real eye opener. Thank you.

[@sandie-squirtle]

I love Your whole set up and color theme... its more comforting and feels nicer and connects more... Epic

[@philray47]

You are an amazing content creator - so real - gives others hope for society and that dating is not hopeless :)

[@lloydfreeman1203]

Totally agree. If she's not openly happy to be with me, don't waste each other's time.

[@jboughtin7522]

The kind information and I would also call it wisdom, should be taught in school at a fairly young age. It would make the world a better place.

[@knuktunes]

I watched 1 video about styles of clothes and have ended up watching a lot of these videos regardless of being in a good relationship, etc. These are really good videos and the type of advice I got from good female friends throughout life. Good on you, Courtney for making these videos.

[@Roozy_Persepolis]

This was a great video. 👍 please do more of these. It's sometimes hard for us to understand what is going on with that girl,but you're explaining everything very well

[@DaedLizrad]

The idea behind "tricking" guys into dates is probably because of the minority of guys the majority of women pursue, online dating has it at 90% chasing 10% but I doubt there isn't something similar happening in the meatspace of normal life and even if it's as low as 60 chasing the top 40 it'll lead to that kind of behavior.

[@JasonEkonomakos]

The first lady is kinda right. The point is that you already approached her and started conversation, now it's up to her whether she wants to continue conversation. It's a natural way to weed out the ones who don't have high interest in you, from the start. It's not about trying to work your way into getting as many dates as possible, it's about finding the ones that genuinely desire you.

[@jimbrown3436]

Every dude on the planet does that. And women dont know anything about pickup at all.

[@jamiekarila3167]

The first lady you had on here had a bit of good advice. I met one of my girlfriends by coming up to her and her friends, saying hi and wishing the birthday girl a happy birthday, chatting for a bit and then walking away. The ladies came up to me afterwards and I ended up dating one of them. What I believed helped me the most in that situation was that I was not trying to gain anything from the interaction. I was just being the nice guy I usually am. Whereas when I would try to get women to dance with me, I would be trying to get something out of the interaction and thereby had less success.

[@jamiekarila3167]

Apparently I should have watched more of the video before replying as the 2nd video validated what I was trying to say :)

[@78pianist]

Fantastic video, Courtney. More sound advice like that should be given in today's world. Keep it up.

[@Velagutti]

Am always in awe of how intelligent you are, I'd really appreciate it if you make a future video, about the resources you use to garner this incredible knowledges about relationships and life in general..... You're a blessing to this world. 🌎

[@CourtneyRyan]

You’re so kind. Thank you ❤️

[@keithskate30]

Dude quit simping. Act like the prize. Guys are the true catch. Not the girl. What fools

[@komandorbentus2731]

"Women are approaching more than before" Me as a male: What? That would be beautiful, if it would be true. 9:40 - that was... so weak, strange, out of blue, empty, trashy and...pathetic? I don't, that was weird. I can't even think like that. I would never realize something like that.

[@bunnyboo6295]

There was a time when girls didn't do it at all there may not be alot of ladies making the first move but it dose happen sometimes. I know my grandma would have never called a boy girls were told not to ask cause boys were raised to be polite and you would be forcing yourself on them

[@1322justinable]

Hey Courtney, you should do a video on guarded women/ mens patience. It seems like now a days more and more men and women are getting hurt, and as a result they become guarded when approaching a new relationship. When you are pursuing a women with a guarded heart, it takes a lot of patience and meticulous navigation to get her to open up. There aren't many videos on this specifically and the information on the internet isn't that informative or it's a little offensive. Guarded women seem to have a negative light in this society, however, they are typically the most interesting. You have a great perspective on things and I would love to hear what you have to say on this! Thanks!

[@oliverpetroski4205]

Excelent video. I realy enjoyed it. The best line: "play stupid games, win stupid prices". I stoped counting how many times Ive seen people wining the stupid prices just because they thought it was "cool, I can fix him..."

[@Comeback180]

Glad I never signed up for Tik Tok it's better to watch it from the sidelines on KZbin. Tik Tok is entertaining with crazy ideas, attention seeking is through the roof and a recipe for increased hospital visits since many idiotic challenges break people's skin or bones.

[@dougscott188]

This video is probably the closest I will come to watching Tik Tock. Thank you for saving me from that.

[@machupikachu1085]

for reals!

[@IbrahimHassan-by8tr]

Once you showed up I said "wow", the dark 🕶️ look is just amazing.

[@BBThemes]

looking at what people do not what they say is so relevant to far more than relationships, best single piece of advice right there!

[@Mouth-pipetter]

I had a girl “asking me for help,” on chemistry homework (they weren’t real homework, they were practice questions), which turned into, “do this problem, ok now this one.” I finally told her she only hit me up when she wanted help, and that I wasn’t going to continue doing the problems for her because her grade was not my responsibility. Apparently I was the asshole 🤣.

[@fondelmaddick5085]

Typical delusional woman, with no accountability.

[@johnnythekid4601]

Going up to any women now isn't worth it because with a single word to HR, the cops or the bouncer she could ruin a mans life and reputation

[@tbiking8099]

Courtney you are so smart listening to you helps me makes sense of past relationships and how to get better at new ones and your the most beautiful girl on youtube.

[@yvesgysel9834]

Last month, my Girlfriend had her period and she was so sick, so I had to go to the supermarket to buy her sanitary napkins. When I was at the aisle and I looked at all this different brands, heavy bleading, tampons..., I realized this was way over my head. So I approached the cashier and ( some Women/Men behind me, waiting at the chechout) I said "This is my first time....., that I buy sanitary napkins, can someone pls help me out?"( A bit too loud, because all the ladies overheard me). Everbody laughed big time and all Women were offering me to help out. Very nice of them.

[@dhananjaypathak]

These tiktok reaction videos are the best!👏🏼😂💯

[@CourtneyRyan]

🙌🏼😂

[@machupikachu1085]

@@CourtneyRyan less prep time too. Win-win!!🤣

[@samantarizzi248]

Thank you, Courtney, for some common sense! We definitely should watch what people do and not what they say or what we imagine they would eventually do or be like.

[@legendofsociety796]

Girls like not being care about unfortunately. Otherwise simps would be the real pimps. The more you care the more you lose.

[@mbrsart]

One time I complimented the new haircut of a classmate I was interested in. She didn't come find me. Granted, she was in a relationship that I didn't know about, but it felt good to force myself to say something nice to somebody without banking on the outcome.

[@nujuh1357]

Courtney i watched your channel for a year now but i havent posted any comment yet so i felt like i needed to post something this time, i want to thank you for your knowledge and perspective on all the diffrent things you have talked about, and i just have to say that its amazing seeing someone as beautiful as you with that kind of intelligence, humility and morals, i really hope i can find someone like you on this planet...but that feels like just so unrealistic when i take a look around and see how people treat each other.. but when i look at you it gives me a great sign of what i want in a woman.

[@CourtneyRyan]

Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment. Wishing you the very best ❤️

[@nujuh1357]

@@CourtneyRyan thank you too!! keep doing what you are doing, i really enjoy the content👌

[@arthurmorgan9575]

Anyone else remember that episode from drake and Josh, when Josh would go up to girls, give them a compliment and walk away? Seeing that first video reminded me of that lol

[@schroederluck7984]

SAME HAHAHA worked wonders for Josh 😂

[@dubeme.3014]

4:25 this is actually what I do now and it definitely helps ease the tension but everything passed that initial conversation and info exchange as been the same....awful😂

[@carloskawamura7957]

I just love and laugh when you said “ wish could give that girl a hug “ I like her content And I enjoyed yours very much 🙏🏻

[@jordanrzepnicki8609]

I can vouch for the idea of not attaching an outcome to your interactions. That’s a lesson that I’ve had learn the hard way through my career. I work in sales so I have to build relationships for a living, and it doesn’t matter if you have the best product in the world, if you’re focusing too much on the outcome you can come across as desperate, and the “buyer” will be turned off from doing business with you. The best way to build a relationship is to genuinely want to get to know someone and showing interest in them. At the end of the day we’re all just people, don’t put anyone on a pedestal and try not to have the outcome of the interaction be at the forefront of your mind.

[@ProfWho-ut5he]

But TikTok is not representative of normal people. I don't know anyone on that platform nor using it. It is usually for socially challenged, shallow people with too much time.

[@testosteronemastery]

Direct approach sucks these days. Spark up conversations with more people in general and you’ll get comfortable sparking up conversations with girls organically. Literally just talk to more people and you’ll get good at talking to girls, even if they’re hot.

[@wrcinc]

Unfortunately there’s a trend of women given other women bad dating advice such as telling them to go absent on a guy days because that’ll make him like her more or using tactics to make a guy chase her. These strategies usually don’t work on men unless he’s desperate/needy, which is what a woman shouldn’t want to attract 😂

[@jairos9866]

Thank you young lady ( Courney Ryan) for sharing great content that is genuine conversations of true connections for the sake of humanity..

[@good_to_be_gold8]

I do them like N’sync when I feel she’s playing mind games BYE BYE BYE 😂

[@CourtneyRyan]

😂👋🏼👋🏼👋🏼

[@petersmith520]

U and Casey Zander are my older siblings that I've never met but needed 😂

[@mathieubussche3428]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts, ideas and opinions, best thing about them is that they all come with a hint of class. Nothing more than that do i appreciate. Though, 2 children later and one single dad later. I'm learning about myself and the pace I want to set for me, myself, and my lifestyle. Checking out a few of your vids today, gave me a good hint on your character, which is something from time to time, we all do, to read people. You've done it yourself in your videos as well. What a better way to get a feel for random, authentic encounters. But one thing men, all men should look for in a lady is class. Not to be confused with sass. Either they have it or they don't. Which would you rather have meet your family? Keep it Classy. Chivalry isn't dead.

[@ubiquitousatman4747]

Such a balanced approach. It’s refreshing 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@Hugh_Hunt]

"Just talk to them, like they are a normal person" ::Gut reaction:: 'But they are not, that is why we are all here Courtney' BAHAHAHAHA This is what I am coming to grips with, I am bad at conversation because I am treating the conversation as a path to an end, not just a conversation... with someone I find attractive or interesting.

[@machupikachu1085]

Sounds like you've isolated the problem, so now you just gotta put the solution into practice. Cheers!

[@joaquinrivera3741]

Be yourself. Be genuine. Be honest. Be nice. Don't be desperate Don't be needy. Don't misrepresent. Don't force it.

[@gusdk13138]

In the talking stage, him telling me that it bothered him that i didn’t reply made me like him more because he came across as a very communicative person. I appreciated that he communicated how he felt so i can say that advice is wrong sometimes :) right people with appreciate your honesty

[@lfvonarx]

Where can I find kind and gentle women like yourself? I really appreciate your perspective and genuine advice. Keep it going.

[@qjtvaddict]

Talk to them all do not get serious till she proves herself

[@flpmlks5181]

the more I watch videos like this, the more I realize that I was a total simp, beta. it is annoying to realize this. but perhaps it is better to finally find out that climbing a mountain means going uphill, not the oposite way :D

[@Matt-tt4cu]

Don't worry bro. The fact you realized that about yourself (assuming it's true) is the first step towards success. Get red-pilled, don't put women on pedestals, and build YOUR life. You wont regret it.

[@ethanadams2013]

Same here, and I am 63 years old and just learning it. Oh how my life would have been different if this kind of knowledge had been around when I was a young man. So at least be grateful you are learning it early (I assume you are young).

[@MonsterMass3d]

I don't think people realize that Courtney is doing everyone a service by calling out all these girls passing on toxicity as legitimate advice. For whatever reason, Tiktok has an algorithm that heavily pushes content, but it unfortunately pushes really bad/false information as well. I've never seen so much incorrect information about finance, fitness, and love/dating advice that comes up on my FYP

[@Westcoastrocksduh]

Tiktok pushes bad content because most of tiktok is bad content

[@IamjustBruh]

I’m with you Dude. I never had a tiktok nor want one.

[@Bullet-Tooth-Tony-]

@@IamjustBruh Ikr its cringy as fuck 27 and never will use it

[@grahamdamberger7130]

You're right about observing the actions of others. Sometimes actions speak louder than words. Words can be twisted into lies but actions can't. And like I heard one KZbinr say, words mean nothing when you're using them simply for clicks on social media, but actions mean a lot. Pay attention to their body language and their actions. You'll know if they mean what they say.

[@scartissuefilms]

The first one is what I used to do, tbf. Not as some planned thing, just what I did naturally when I saw something I liked (hairstyle, dress etc) on an attractive woman. It worked a lot of times. You'd know instantly if there was a shot, as they would respond with something positive about you, or at least immediately engage with you. Women rarely make cold approaches (though it happens) but it's common in my experience for women to come and talk to me once I've gone and introduced myself earlier...if you've made a positive impression, you make yourself safe and available etc. They're not going to walk across the room and talk to you across a table. They will happen to bump into you at the bar while you're buying a drink and have a chat. I think you always have to give the woman room, some kind of deniable plausibility, an escape route so that's she's got some control over the situation. If you are open, honest and have no particular expectations of people, conversation is usually fairly easy between people. And once conversation is easy, things can go anywhere they want, really.

[@ElyjahDHerring]

7:25 if a guy gets ghosted and he feels the need to express himself then he should express himself because that's what he wants to do, and it's better out than in, this is not even advice this is you telling us men to suck it up and some how you wanna say that it's a bruised ego? Lady you can not say things like that without any logical understanding because it's not necessarily a "bruised ego" it's more like "I expected you as women to have the deceny to it least tell me what's going on so that I can give you that respect" being needy is not an ego problem it's how you finish the conversation, it's how you deal with the man that makes the man unsatisfied with the convo or whatever it is that's on his mind. Points taken from you ms.

[@aaronharlow2137]

Courtney, STOP giving this toxic advice of "make your intentions clear." I cannot tell you how many times I have been dumped/rejected over a guy that she kind of likes but can't quite tell if he's into her or if he just wants her for sex or if there's something... If you honestly believe women aren't attracted to guys they don't know if they like them or not, you're not in touch with reality. Women crave that. If I didn't witness this a hundred times already, I wouldn't be saying it.

[@aaronharlow2137]

@Flow :0 nope, she's totally fine with me, we're compatible, getting along, then out of nowhere, some guy comes along, gets her attention by acting not interested, she doesn't know if he is, end of relationship. She doesn't want the guy she already knows is interested because there's no mystery there.

[@geraldleuven169]

​@@aaronharlow2137 You make a great point. Also, back to the video, a woman only responds positive towards a compliment if she thinks the guy is attractive. If she doesn't think you are attractive it doesn't matter how genuine your compliment is.

[@aaronharlow2137]

@@geraldleuven169 she'll respond positively, cause I've done this before, but you're correct, unless she finds you attractive as well, she won't pursue you (and even then its unlikely)

[@geraldleuven169]

@@aaronharlow2137 Yes or she uses that confidence she got from the compliment to chase the guys she really wants. LOL

[@miniweeddeerz1820]

Well then surely you shouldn't be in a relationship with that person anyway. Because if they are addicted to the chase over the relationship, how is the relationship with any person supposed to last, after the chase is finished.

[@robinsonnunez2576]

Thank you courtney for all your episode and knowledge I learned alot

[@donshaffer4169]

Been married 27 years. Got 5 kids. Wife and I did the dating thing very straight and honest (with each other and prior relationships). It beats playing games. Why is that so hard for people to do?

[@qjtvaddict]

The culture is toxic

[@machupikachu1085]

It beats playing games? Really?? Ever heard of Hungry, Hungry Hippos?? 🤣