Who Needs Married Men? - Dulcé Sloan

  Рет қаралды 407,928

Comedy Central Stand-Up

Comedy Central Stand-Up

Күн бұрын

Dulcé Sloan is not interested in seeing the faces of married men.
Original airdate: October 25, 2019
About Comedy Central Stand-Up Presents:
In the time-honored tradition of Comedy Central’s half-hour specials, Comedy Central Stand-Up Presents features the best and brightest emerging comedians performing thirty minutes of material.
#StandUp #DulcéSloan
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Пікірлер: 315
@TobyIsAWoman
@TobyIsAWoman 4 жыл бұрын
Her delivery is so poised and effortless, she's incredible.
@ss11111ss
@ss11111ss 4 жыл бұрын
shes hilarious
@zacg5714
@zacg5714 4 жыл бұрын
So so funny
@tywilliams3891
@tywilliams3891 4 жыл бұрын
On point I am a new fan.
@gritsonamission
@gritsonamission 4 жыл бұрын
"You gotta leave your house,"... ... That hit really hard.
@heathermetz6576
@heathermetz6576 4 жыл бұрын
2:25 “Old Testament God, is my favorite God, ‘cause he played no games. I told y’all to stop doin’ dumb stih. You know what flood the Earth, try me again!”
@brandonsamuels6457
@brandonsamuels6457 4 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂
@sa1shree
@sa1shree 4 жыл бұрын
Who ever edited this, why're you only catering to my left ear? DULCÉ NEEDS TO BE HEARD W BOTH MY EARS.
@tastyanagram
@tastyanagram 4 жыл бұрын
I was just going to leave the same comment. So weird. The audience is in stereo but her voice is only in the left channel.
@evahernandez4748
@evahernandez4748 4 жыл бұрын
I thought I was going crazy
@bulbasour3
@bulbasour3 4 жыл бұрын
I thought it was just my shitty headphones lol
@mermaidismyname
@mermaidismyname 4 жыл бұрын
I thought my headphones were broken
@GeckoMena4433
@GeckoMena4433 4 жыл бұрын
Ugh my left bud is broken. I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t hear her 😂
@killerwolf514
@killerwolf514 4 жыл бұрын
"Hey, I wanna meet a man." "You gotta leave your house." "Oh, no..." Don't call me out like this!
@evamariagarciavelazquez846
@evamariagarciavelazquez846 4 жыл бұрын
It killed me🤣🤣
@Eurisko229
@Eurisko229 4 жыл бұрын
Eva María García Velázquez i can relate to that. I tell my cousin I want to date, she says how are you going to find someone to date if you don’t leave the house? I go quite and try to change the subject.
@evamariagarciavelazquez846
@evamariagarciavelazquez846 4 жыл бұрын
@@Eurisko229 same sister, same
@schiros123
@schiros123 4 жыл бұрын
oh my god it killed me too... i mean i say that a lot but it really did.
@MoniCu92
@MoniCu92 4 жыл бұрын
I FEEL SO ATTACKED RN!
@alannabruce
@alannabruce 4 жыл бұрын
"Sir, I might be a big bitch, but I don't orbit the Earth." 🤣😂😂🤣🤣😂😭😭
@bleepbloopskrrr
@bleepbloopskrrr 4 жыл бұрын
“Did you know you can’t meet the love of your life at home watching murder mysteries?” 🤣🤣🤣
@langashouse7760
@langashouse7760 4 жыл бұрын
I would have met the LOML fifty thousand times by now 🤣
@wandanemer2630
@wandanemer2630 3 жыл бұрын
What you mean I can't??
@belizegal29
@belizegal29 6 ай бұрын
😂😂😂
@Aizuboy
@Aizuboy 4 жыл бұрын
CALL 🗣 YOUR🗣WIFE🗣
@E.JayViera
@E.JayViera 4 жыл бұрын
He didn’t need that.
@KateCarew
@KateCarew 4 жыл бұрын
Such a natural, and lord knows this is NOT easy, but making it look and sound easy is GIFT 🙏🏻
@grayrachelle
@grayrachelle 4 жыл бұрын
True. She is so smooth.
@ladyligeia1
@ladyligeia1 4 жыл бұрын
My Italian boyfriend was next to me the whole time... his face was gold xD
@LeslieNoHeels
@LeslieNoHeels 3 жыл бұрын
“I look at men how men look at women. I’M A PROBLEM.” Deaded.
@spurge83
@spurge83 2 жыл бұрын
"Deaded". Cringe.
@SmartArtzzz
@SmartArtzzz 4 жыл бұрын
Dulce should have hosted the BET awards. Also who did the audio?
@saraparnell72
@saraparnell72 3 жыл бұрын
"I wanna see the beautiful head of hair that will exfoliate me as I give birth.".....had me laughing way too hard. 😆
@Thedownwardmineon
@Thedownwardmineon 4 жыл бұрын
I said, "CALL YOUR WIFE!!!!" LMAO
@senaitgoshutekleyesus3009
@senaitgoshutekleyesus3009 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my God... the part about leaving your house and giving up true crimes documentaries, I felt that on so many levels... it's why I'm single!!!
@shegotbettermorale8598
@shegotbettermorale8598 4 жыл бұрын
Flood the earth, try me again , try me again !
@JoAnnHassler
@JoAnnHassler 4 жыл бұрын
I love Dulce;. she looks gorgeous! Who designed her dress...perfect!
@user-bj7em4fv1p
@user-bj7em4fv1p 4 жыл бұрын
She owns the stage! What a professional ❤️
@HuddyN96
@HuddyN96 4 жыл бұрын
“Call your wife” ; A phrase side dishes need to learn😂😂
@mara3572
@mara3572 3 жыл бұрын
Or maybe a phrase that efing, dirty, cheating males have to keep in mind
@lamorg
@lamorg 4 жыл бұрын
I rewatch every Dulcé Sloan stand-up whenever i feel down. This woman is a miracle
@mercedess615
@mercedess615 3 жыл бұрын
“I should have asked for their last names, that’s on me.” She is becoming one of my favorite comics.
@48Murillo
@48Murillo 4 жыл бұрын
Dulcé is always refreshing af
@TragoudistrosMPH
@TragoudistrosMPH 4 жыл бұрын
That's the cleanest you can get talking about this subject 😂 She's so great lol
@kimicappiello5480
@kimicappiello5480 4 жыл бұрын
I love this woman so very much!
@kelseycoca
@kelseycoca 4 жыл бұрын
Like GYM SOCKS I cannot breathe lol I love her
@Neenerella333
@Neenerella333 4 жыл бұрын
I love Dulce! Love her podcast too. "That Blackass Show" . If you were an 80s or 90s teen, you'll love it.
@luversroc
@luversroc 4 жыл бұрын
She’s incredibly funny. She had me at “at Afro +jewfro” 😂
@hkbabel
@hkbabel 4 жыл бұрын
never seen Ms. Sloan before, and I really enjoyed! Off to research.. thank you! Edit - guess I need to start watching Daily Show again, my ignorance is showing!
@umbraviventem
@umbraviventem 4 жыл бұрын
Idk if it was the recording or the upload, but someone messed up and only left speakers are working with this audio.
@dismondjmiller9220
@dismondjmiller9220 4 жыл бұрын
I thought my headphones had a shortage... 🤣
@DJsportinggoods
@DJsportinggoods 4 жыл бұрын
@K R AY N E mono signal innit
@amberl.8245
@amberl.8245 4 жыл бұрын
If I rotate it, the audio is horrible on her voice. If I watch it vertically it's fine. I can't hear it with headphones.
@catcher717
@catcher717 4 жыл бұрын
I dont have a left speaker
@paulak.marais642
@paulak.marais642 4 жыл бұрын
Sitting in the house watching murder mysteries is literally my life
@gritsonamission
@gritsonamission 4 жыл бұрын
Sir, why do your parents hate me? I'm dead!
@blue-gc9ze
@blue-gc9ze 4 жыл бұрын
LMAO, i have noise cancelling headphones. I put one side on and the other behind my ear. I could only hear the audience laughing. At first I thought she was pretending to talk and just making faces... until it lasted the entire 6 minutes. I read comments and people were quoting what she was saying. I thought y'all were lip reading. Till I discovered that audio is split. Audience in my right ear and her in the left. Team, who told y'all this was alright?
@belzbistoque8732
@belzbistoque8732 4 жыл бұрын
"I'm a problem!"~Dolce
@Sharilyn2455
@Sharilyn2455 4 жыл бұрын
"Who sent you?" Gah she is hilarious!
@ninayeun3081
@ninayeun3081 4 жыл бұрын
when the special Netflix coming??? Please😭😭
@laurendukes3099
@laurendukes3099 4 жыл бұрын
She's one of my top fav comics. Plus, her name means candy. What's not to love? More DULCÉ, please?!?
@cwalker6911
@cwalker6911 4 жыл бұрын
I have only ever known her for the daily show but I just say, her stand up is far funnier! I can’t wait to hear more from her
@nancydrew5
@nancydrew5 4 жыл бұрын
Looking forward to catching her live! She's Amazing!
@ameakafatima2385
@ameakafatima2385 4 жыл бұрын
'Old Testament God is a black parent' #Word😃 New Testament God just messing us up with multiple personalities.
@thechristianteen9167
@thechristianteen9167 4 жыл бұрын
We lucky we got New Testament God. We wouldn't survive Old Testament God.
@emmgeevideo
@emmgeevideo 4 жыл бұрын
I’ve heard her on Wait Wait Don’t Tell me and finally got smart and looked her up on KZbin. She’s hilarious!
@holleyhoffman6011
@holleyhoffman6011 4 жыл бұрын
She’s hysterical 😂💚
@vaniset
@vaniset 4 жыл бұрын
When she said oh no I felt that 😭😭😭😭
@Otter-Destruction
@Otter-Destruction 4 жыл бұрын
The need to post the entire stand up shes great
@rayshardthompson1456
@rayshardthompson1456 4 жыл бұрын
Where it says unintelligible in the subtitles at 1:17, she says "is he knock kneed? is he pigeon toed? Birth defect!"
@gabehessenthaler6820
@gabehessenthaler6820 4 жыл бұрын
She's so underrated
@GabrielaChirila88
@GabrielaChirila88 3 жыл бұрын
oh my god I love this woman she's brilliant
@Raphael_NYC
@Raphael_NYC 4 жыл бұрын
So talented. Thank you.
@cj10109
@cj10109 3 жыл бұрын
It’s like she’s having a conversation! 😂😂
@anactualalpaca7016
@anactualalpaca7016 3 жыл бұрын
my left ear really loved her jokes :')
@GrimlyYours
@GrimlyYours 4 жыл бұрын
I lost it at that, "oh *no*" 😭😭😭
@jodiedaniels8306
@jodiedaniels8306 4 жыл бұрын
She’s phenomenal!
@alfiona7951
@alfiona7951 4 жыл бұрын
This was so funny but I had to take off my head phones lol
@jrose1999
@jrose1999 4 жыл бұрын
LMAOOOOO shes always screaming but that's what sends me Everytime
@JeremyMYG
@JeremyMYG 4 жыл бұрын
I loveeee me some Dulcé Sloan. Hilarious!
@gabehessenthaler6820
@gabehessenthaler6820 4 жыл бұрын
Baby girl better find herself some Cohen's, Levy's, Goldberg's, and Horowitz's.
@Destinyatk
@Destinyatk 2 жыл бұрын
I got to start off with the last names. That's on me..🤣🤣
@hannahwilliams2472
@hannahwilliams2472 4 жыл бұрын
*me talking with God* Me: I want a man. God: Well, you gotta leave your house.
@mv11000
@mv11000 Жыл бұрын
Had never heard of her, what a wonderful talent!
@asj188
@asj188 4 ай бұрын
my left ear is loving this
@JAY-CRA
@JAY-CRA 4 жыл бұрын
My first time seeing her and she was funny 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@AnGeLoUs07
@AnGeLoUs07 4 жыл бұрын
She’s hilarious! 😂 😂
@Nada.n82
@Nada.n82 4 жыл бұрын
Well done, Dulcé 👏
@bleepbloopskrrr
@bleepbloopskrrr 4 жыл бұрын
Lmao, my mom will ask directions and it’s like mom no one in the car knows more than Google! Just GPS it!
@thesprinklebox4841
@thesprinklebox4841 3 жыл бұрын
"Pigeon toed, birth defect, get outta here" lol
@xoxo-dr8df
@xoxo-dr8df 4 жыл бұрын
DULCÉ DESERVES A GRAND SPECIAL AND A BUG TOUR.
@jkcreationz9118
@jkcreationz9118 4 жыл бұрын
Rip the right ear
@BlindingDarkness1111
@BlindingDarkness1111 4 жыл бұрын
Me and Dulce are on the same, exact wave...LOVE IT!!!!! 🥰
@LycanLink
@LycanLink 4 жыл бұрын
Dulcé, you rock.
@julesg.3562
@julesg.3562 4 жыл бұрын
Gym socks 😂 😂
@SuperScooterPop
@SuperScooterPop 4 жыл бұрын
I'm mad that I can only upvote this once
@ziotsky
@ziotsky 4 жыл бұрын
my left ear enjoyed this
@cinjhang
@cinjhang 4 жыл бұрын
my right ear doesn’t get the jokes
@thenarrator4800
@thenarrator4800 4 жыл бұрын
i thought it was my headphones
@SabzeeS
@SabzeeS 4 жыл бұрын
Love this hilarious goddess ♥️😂😂😂
@spaceo8568
@spaceo8568 4 жыл бұрын
She's amazing.
@spectacularrichbeautybrilli
@spectacularrichbeautybrilli 4 жыл бұрын
BRAVO 👏. ENCORE‼️
@amandah3619
@amandah3619 4 жыл бұрын
She is hilarious
@ecot7085
@ecot7085 4 жыл бұрын
My right ear enjoying this
@silverbat5873
@silverbat5873 4 жыл бұрын
😂 Aint nothing wrong with manhood in it's natural form, tho. LOL
@CeartGoLeor86
@CeartGoLeor86 4 жыл бұрын
Way back in time, there had to have been someone who invented the idea of circumcision. Like there was a time when it wasn't a thing at all. And someone came up with the idea of chopping of skin around dicks. What sort of weirdo came up with that?
@DorotaGabal
@DorotaGabal 4 жыл бұрын
@@CeartGoLeor86 my guess is it was first done for someone who's skin was too tight, or who got a nasty infection. And then they discovered it's pretty neat for conditions where maintaining good hygiene is hard, to prevent infection. Not needed when you have good access to water and all, but that's also why I think it originated where it did, in arid lands.
@CeartGoLeor86
@CeartGoLeor86 4 жыл бұрын
@@DorotaGabal That's a good theory. Thanks for that. I've hear of phimosis where the foreskin is too tight and in olden times especially, that would be the easiest treatment alright. I know that ritual circumcision is a thing in Judaism. Even though the climate is arid in Israel, ritual washing was also a big thing in Judaism. So in ancient times, they would have had far better personal hygiene than Europeans for example.
@DorotaGabal
@DorotaGabal 4 жыл бұрын
CeartGoLeor86 for sure. Same in Islam. However, in the desert, you had to wash with sand. Which is okay for other parts, but if I were a dude, I wouldn’t want fine sand under my foreskin either.
@thebaglady1443
@thebaglady1443 4 жыл бұрын
Everything wrong with it. Why are you not walking around with your umbilical cord attached?
@charisburge7180
@charisburge7180 4 жыл бұрын
SHE IS SO FUNNY I CANT
@grizzlyblue486
@grizzlyblue486 4 жыл бұрын
She's so beautiful and so funny ❤️
@kasetophono
@kasetophono 2 жыл бұрын
SHE IS SO AMAZING, I'm dead
@januaryhymn
@januaryhymn 4 жыл бұрын
we’ve decided to stan
@mimochin6023
@mimochin6023 3 жыл бұрын
where can i watch the full video?
@NC-qc7wd
@NC-qc7wd 4 жыл бұрын
I am addicted to her, lol
@KZ_MMA-KZ
@KZ_MMA-KZ 4 жыл бұрын
And the same goes for married women 🤙🏼
@chandlersohns6258
@chandlersohns6258 4 жыл бұрын
I can only hear the audience
@renatosilva9142
@renatosilva9142 4 жыл бұрын
The audience comes up in my right ear, her voice in the left. It's weird.
@AishiCheemo
@AishiCheemo 4 жыл бұрын
@@renatosilva9142 same. Also we need new earbuds 😳
@mystyyyyy
@mystyyyyy 4 жыл бұрын
The audio had me like... wait! Am i watching this in surround?
@carrots_arelife2924
@carrots_arelife2924 4 жыл бұрын
Future bright ass star right here. Damn shes a natural!
@JaanaHaav
@JaanaHaav 4 жыл бұрын
First I was only listening with my right headphone, without checking the comments I thought she just acted she was muted and the audience was laughing at that😂 good that I checked the comments, otherwise I would have waited the whole video her to end the joke and speak
@vorimusic1211
@vorimusic1211 4 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣
@pxl9365
@pxl9365 4 жыл бұрын
I'm uncertain if my earphones are off or if the video is off...😜
@Drumdom720
@Drumdom720 3 жыл бұрын
Why is the audio fully panned
@autumnjones3699
@autumnjones3699 4 жыл бұрын
10 seconds in already crying
@inomisonotuttipresi
@inomisonotuttipresi 4 жыл бұрын
As an Italian woman, I can confirm.
@fenecofeneco19
@fenecofeneco19 4 жыл бұрын
what..?
@litoxxlito_axx7318
@litoxxlito_axx7318 Жыл бұрын
0:24 “call your wife!!!”
@brunavalverde2804
@brunavalverde2804 4 жыл бұрын
“Now I look at man like man look at woman I’m a PROBLEM”
@hippiesanonymous
@hippiesanonymous 4 жыл бұрын
Hilarious !
@sampsonkirk23
@sampsonkirk23 4 жыл бұрын
I only had my right earbud in and I thought they were broken at first lol
@RoyaltyReynold
@RoyaltyReynold 4 жыл бұрын
Big fan 👏
@tanleelee268
@tanleelee268 4 жыл бұрын
When u know u relate to dolce, u know are on on a different level 😭😭😭😭😭 u know u are on a different level. Watching her made me realise I'm no longer that wide-eyed early adult that I'm am no more. 😭 I wished I could see things as just the way they are, but what She said, looking at all these nice feature and looking further only realise he spend money or whatever etc, then go oh hell no! Truth. This gal speaks in to use her own words' 'The Lord's truth' 🙌. 😂❤
@mushroom6707
@mushroom6707 4 жыл бұрын
Wheres her special?
@javierlambert4861
@javierlambert4861 4 жыл бұрын
I'm in love❤❤❤❤
@jasmainjasmain2906
@jasmainjasmain2906 3 жыл бұрын
I definitely be scanning men 😂
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