Life After Loss | Part 1: Grief

Рет қаралды 13,036

9 ай бұрын

What would you do if your child took their own life? Would you give up hope? Or would you find the strength to keep on living?
This season on In Therapy with Alex Howard, we meet Paul, a 60-year-old father who lost his daughter to suicide just six months ago.
Paul has locked all of his emotions in a box since he lost his mum at age three, and that this recent deeply traumatic event has caused the box to explode open, leaving him in a state of complete emotional overwhelm.
Paul applied to be part of In Therapy as he feels broken and wants to learn how to be whole again. He’s ready to confront the dark places he’s spent his life trying to escape and meet his pain head on.
Join us as we witness the raw emotions and profound challenges Paul faces along his healing journey, and find out the answers to questions like: Why do we repress our emotions after trauma? What is the best way to process grief? How can we get more in touch with our emotions? And fundamentally, is it possible to overcome the death of a child?
Above all, Life After Loss is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit, and we invite you to embark on this powerful exploration with us.
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In Therapy with Alex Howard is a first-of-its-kind series that places you directly in the therapy room. Join us each week as we follow every step of people’s journeys, both in and outside of the therapy room, and learn the tools to unlock your true potential.
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Website: www.alexhoward.com
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Content is produced by Oliver Halls (Instagram: @oliver.halls) and Jeremiah Fernandes (Instagram: @jeremiah.fernandes).

Пікірлер: 51

@patriciavdputten8732 7 ай бұрын

Wow, this could be my story. My father died when I was 2.5 and we never spoke about him again. Only on the day of his death we went to church. A new man came (I was 11) and all filth and bad things were told about my dad. And it hurt. When I was 19 my beautiful son was born. And I gave him everything I missed. He took his life at 29. And I ...I don't kwow. Tried to go on as usual. But that didn't work. My little me yelled yes hear me!! When Alex mentioned that to Paul. So helpfull. Thank you both for shearing this ❤ (I think I need a new therapist, been in different sorts for 2 years now.)

@PaulRibbons 7 ай бұрын

I hear you. Stay strong x

@PaulRibbons 9 ай бұрын

This has been one hell of a journey, the first part of this series was a real eye opener, I was still raw and Alex always made me feel safe and secure in all I revealed. Watching it back brings tears to my eyes, especially the end of this video.

@loobylouboti 9 ай бұрын

Holy COW this was intense/powerful. Firstly, it has blown me away just how courageous Paul is to put himself forward for therapy just 6 months after his daughter took her own life. That is just so courageous, honestly. Most ppl would either take their own life..or they would stuff their feelings down so deeply and compactly that there would be no unpacking in sight. It would likely ruin their lives, and the lives of others close to them. Understandable coping mechanism, no shame here. .. For Paul to reach out, and to do this work, shows how much he cares about the people in his life, amd shows his character. Of which his lovely daughter gave us a glimpse of in the excerpt from her letter. ..She sounds like she was amazing. And I am INCREDIBLY sorry for her loss. For both her and her family. 💔 Many blessings to Paul moving forward in his life and God bless you man Alex. You have such a wonderful heart and way with ppl. ❤

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Thank you for your kind words - yes, Paul is incredibly courageous :-)

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

It was a tough decision to make, but after researching Alex's work, it was an opportunity I could not pass up, I knew I had to deal with it, for the sake of all those around me. it has changed my life and everyone who knows me can see that.

@eaglewindspirit 9 ай бұрын

And Jesus cried…touching story Alex!

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Yes, Paul is so brave

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

Yes it was very spiritual for me in many ways

@jillurron2989 9 ай бұрын

Thank you Paul for sharing your story. Thank you Alex.

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching 🙂

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

Thank you, it was a privilege to allowed it to be shown..

@scorpiosmith5983 9 ай бұрын

This is raw complicated grief and will be so helpful to others too. I really admire the way You work with people Alex, it requires a personal skill that goes beyond just applying techniques. It’s like walking a tightrope with another person who has no balance. Therapy at its finest and I commend you for that.

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it 🙂

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

He was extremely respectful and his skills showed through. what people don't see is his patients, as there were hours of footage not shown where he allowed me to stay in that safe place where Alex allowed me to go. I always felt I could say do what was needed to come through the other side, I had held my mothers grief for 57 years, and no therapist before had the skills and authority to not allow me to distract away from my pain, he then held me there until we got the result needed. I will forever be grateful to Alex

@flamissia4 9 ай бұрын

Thank you Alex for your dedication to evolving the emotional intelligence of our society. We have developed our intellectual intelligence enough to create bombs that can destroy the planet and explore galaxies far away in the Universe, but we are shockingly ignorant about the Universe within us. Societies all over the world pressure us to stuff our emotions and not show or express them, as if they don't matter. But of course, they DO matter, they play an important role in our thoughts, beliefs and actions, and therefore the world we co-create! I share your passion to create a more emotionally intelligent and compassionate world. I am also grateful to Paul for sharing his raw, uninhibited vulnerable realness in his grief process. I believe his daughter is proud and grateful in Heaven that, by sharing his grief journey, he is helping bring healing to those who struggle with grief.

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for such a wonderful explanation. I certainly agree with that sentiment. Watching it back certainly shows me what a state I was in before coming to see Alex, but it was all worth it.

@flamissia4 6 ай бұрын

@@PaulRibbons You're so very welcome. I send you warm greetings and blessings.

@corinnel.128 9 ай бұрын

Thanks to you Alex and to Paul for this video very emotional. Paul, you are very brave and wishing you to heal during this grief journey.

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching - and yes, Paul is immensely brave :-)

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

Thank you, It has been so healing, I feel a different man

@katiemalloy9968 9 ай бұрын

I felt really angry hearing how the people around him pretended like his mother didn't exist. I was ten when my father died suddenly. I was allowed to grieve, I was allowed to talk about him,I was allowed to express my emotions of anger,fear and sadness,yet the amount of times I hear of people taking this type of approach where they think that brushing it under the carpet will stop the sadness..it doesn't, you are just creating future problems for that person.

@Polina-hn7hu 9 ай бұрын

Since majority of people brought up in families where kids should be seen but not heard, very few actually had the priveledge of emotional safety. This means sweeping emotions under the rug is the only emotion management strategy they were modeled and therefore use in their lives too.

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Yes, its a huge impact...

@susanridley1091 9 ай бұрын

Absolutely. My experience of losing my father to suicide at age 4 was identical to Paul's. A cousin said a # of yrs ago-- re: not knowing anything about him & other family members who were shunned by my mom &/or dad's sister--"you were like an adopted child in your own biological family." So true...took me 55 yrs to FULLY process his death & mom's/aunt's cover up, lack of discussion, acknowledgement of hie very existence. Terrible for me.

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

@@susanridley1091 Thats a Heavy burden to carry for many years, I feel your pain and my thoughts are with you.

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

I carried the anger for many years, But I forgive them, it must of been hard trying to explain to a 3 yr old where there Mum is. I wish they had arranged a memorial for her , for at least I would have had somewhere to go. Thanks for your support

@lonewolfgaming4468 7 ай бұрын

Wish I could add a care option...19 years since I lost my child to SIDS...started a PhD in her memory....

@mirandaandrea8215 6 ай бұрын

What an amazing man! Respect for showing your vulnerability!

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

Thank you, it was tough, but I was in very safe hands

@rachel8219 9 ай бұрын

Really powerful.

@AlexHowardTherapy 9 ай бұрын

Thank you 🙂

@nanboese 6 ай бұрын

wow, there's too much here to comment on. I will be thinking about this for a long time. Thank you Paul. Thank you Alex. on a different note, can you let me know what song is playing at the end of the session? it is so beautiful. I'd love to listen to it in its entirety. Thanks.

@PaulRibbons 6 ай бұрын

I still watch it back and get something from this, Alex did say to me I would do that, yes lots to take in. Thank you