Can you turn gay? Bisexual anxieties.

This video talks about the common bisexual anxiety of feeling like you have turned gay. Many bisexual people worry that they have lost their sexual attraction to a particular gender and that their whole identity needs to change.
It’s a common anxiety that may of us have but is so rarely talked about. As a specialist sexuality coach I am providing some information of this and what to do if you are going through it.
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[@notdefining]

To speak with me and many other like-minded people, join us on patreon.com/notdefining. For 1:1 coaching with me you can book an appointment at www.notdefining.com/coaching-info. To support my work and get priority replies to comments and more, click the JOIN button.

[@baxiaaa]

Love this! Perfect explanation❤

[@DJNeonscape]

I find this interesting as I bi I haven't dated anyone yet but I need to start feeling confident with myself and treat everyone the same.

[@bluemoon9732]

Thank you Mark for the explanation. I fully agree with you. What helped me a lot, as a bi woman, is to allow myself to love whom I want (physically and emotionally). Not to restrict myself on what society pretends to be "normal" and to let go step by step the hetheronormative indoctrination and expectations.

[@notdefining]

Hey thank you so so much for sharing this beautiful wisdom. I am so delighted to hear that you have been able to find this in yourself and break away from heteronormative expectations. How is life feeling at the moment as a bi person? Sending so much love and all my best wishes, from your fellow bi community 🩷💙💜

[@someonesomeone25]

I became bisexual when I was in my early 40s, at about the same time I lost my gender identity and became an objectum. Sexual fluidity is real. Some People change. It's fine.

[@panthersworld5587]

Even though I'm not bi but I still did find interest in getting to know the bisexuality community enjoying reading people stories heck even receive invitation from a bisexual individual for message chat

[@notdefining]

Hey I’m so glad. We’re so glad you’re here and taking an interest.

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Call it a freaky coincidence, but I was just wondering if you were releasing a new video. Happy to see you again!

[@notdefining]

Aaah I’m so pleased. Yes I often release on a Friday afternoon but not always. I hope you enjoy it. 🩷🩷🩷

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Being kind and nice to yourself is so easy. The only challenge is to sound authentic.

[@aaduckie]

i realised i was bi the morning after bi visibility day last year (double party!). ever since then i've noticed that my attraction to guys has dropped almost completely and i'm much more drawn to women (and some other feminine presenting people). i've realised since then that what i actually want in a partner is what i've been putting out into the world and my past relationships - the love, warmth, delicate touch, gentleness, heart-connection, etc... which is most commonly found in femme people. i'm drawn to someone who's my equal not my opposite i'm also realising that genuine deep connections are incredibly important to me in both friendships and relationships, and poor connections have made things really difficult for me in past relationships. it still feels weird, but i'm working on accepting the fact that i'm probably demi

[@Kgeeganage]

Thank you Mark for the video! It's really helpful. You see, i used to get this weird obsession where like i was kinda anxious that i would turn straight! I know its very ironical, given that the society i live in is very heteronormative but the problem has grown ever since i identified as bi. I admire my feelings for the same gender and they mean a lot to me, so its like i'm kinda anxious that i might lose all of that attraction... i have OCD too, which makes those anxieties very intrusive and stupid. But when you pointed out that gender is not mutually exclusive but a spectrum, i realized that i have thought it all wrong. We shouldn't categorise people but instead embrace them as a human being. Like u said i also feel the emotional and physical needs i have towards both men and women are not the same but unique to the particular person...

[@notdefining]

Hey thank you so much for sharing your experience. It’s so appreciated.

[@alienzardsketter.9076]

With out Love the human soul dies.

[@PyramidTom]

What do you mean with embodying the needs? In your exameple a men that feel sensitive and want to be held, how exactly he would show in action or words that is that what he wants?

[@notdefining]

Good question. Set the intention every morning when you wake up. “Today I set the intention to feel gentle, sensitive and held”. Repeat it. Keep doing it. See what happens.

[@TaraBryn]

Before I started transition I was strictly attracted to men, but I alao had a thing for fem boys and was equally attracted to dominant and submissive men (or maybe slightly more attracted to dominant men). After transition, my attraction shifted slightly and while I still prefer men, I consider myself bi and can be attracted to a woman, the odd thing is, since that happened in terms of women I tend to be drawn to more muscular and dominant women, and have a not-insignificant biased towards men who like to be dominated. I think it might be because when I was young I constructed my own identity around breaking down social norms and now I'm just naturally drawn to people who don't fit societal expectations of gender.

[@freddyjafar1490]

Don't know if you have already, but I would appreciate a video on signs a guy is bi and likes you. I ask because I thought a guy in my class was kinda into me but then he confuses me. I usually find him staring at me and I stare back, he smiles and I think ok it is just a friend thing. Sometimes, he tells me how handsome I am but when I try to do the same he gets quiet and kind of cold. This happens so randomly and usually doesn't fit the situation. Like we could be having a class and he blurts out how handsome I am. It is worse when he starts drinking but then I try to hang out with him and it feels like he is disgusted by me.

[@TheFelcardon]

Hello Mark, I am felipe from Colombia, I would like to translate your videos for spanish public, I think your knownledge and wisdom could be helpful for spanish speakers, please let me know if you are interested

[@notdefining]

Hey there, sure that would be fab. KZbin has subtitles already but you are welcome to translate them.

[@TheFelcardon]

​@@notdefining I mean create a Spanish KZbin Channel with your Videos, and I would dub your videos in Spanish, do you agree?

[@notdefining]

@@TheFelcardon click the links in my bio and you’ll find my email. If you have an enquiry we can discuss there. Thanks again. Happy to chat.

[@TheFelcardon]

@@notdefining i justo did