r/Niceguys | this will be interesting..

Top posts from r/Niceguys on Reddit. Join the community subreddit at / emkay ! Video credits below.
Narrator ► / xycronva
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[@sazupollo5752]

The simultaneous “wanting all women to be virgins” and also “wanting all women to put out on the first date” is hilarious

[@redscar1973]

I thought about that recently. It makes no sense!

[@Blajah_]

And the "wanting all women to be good at sex"

[@GraceRamsey-fd8lp]

Humans are confusing...

[@iniratagen9740]

They want to be 'special enough' to take their virginity lol

[@blackthornwhitethorn6679]

@@GraceRamsey-fd8lpno, men. Men do this. This is specific to men. This is bad male behavior, not human behavior.

[@AndreJNick]

Why is nobody talking about how creepy and gross it is for someone to tell their niece "nice guys LIKE ME never get a chance"

[@bumblebeeyellowdragon]

I'm pretty sure that post was made up. It just doesn't sound like a real scenario more like a fantasy. It is 100% creepy for more reasons than just that too.

[@AndreJNick]

@@bumblebeeyellowdragon it better be

[@AndreJNick]

@@bumblebeeyellowdragon if it's not somebody better show this post to that girls parents

[@bumblebeeyellowdragon]

@@AndreJNick Well here's why it's probably not real. In what scenario does a 16 year old teen hang around a 35 year old uncle by herself while talking on the phone with her boyfriend in a manner in which the boyfriend can be heard by said uncle in the background? As a woman I can tell you there's no scenario in which that would occur especially with the way he's describing. Teen girls also wouldn't argue like that with a man who's 35. He's painting her as if he's her peer which obviously isn't the case. So either he's making the scenario up or omitting a lot. Honestly the way he's using so many Hollywood movie stereotypes leads me to further believe it's not real.

[@AndreJNick]

@@bumblebeeyellowdragon as someone who grew up in a very religious family and as a human I can tell you this absolutely does happen. As far as the Hollywood tropes, are you surprised? Even if this guy is for real there's no way he's living in reality

[@tomithebunny]

What always kills me is that dudes will complain about women "generalizing" men, but then decide that since they saw one woman in a relationship with a dude THEY think is an asshole, they are now going to assume that literally ALL women date assholes.

[@qazhr]

I seen girls who act exactly like nice guys but get praised for it.

[@tomithebunny]

@@qazhr this channel literally runs r/nicegirls videos too you walnut

[@cynister7384]

​@@qazhrThis is related how exactly?

[@Yelloweyedrobo]

@@qazhrgeneralising moment

[@Mechanicalamity]

They always act like women should always just know instinctively when a guy is bad for them. They don’t tend to wear a sign saying “I’m a jerk, please go out with me”

[@jan-Pala]

i love listening to Robin go through this sub because it restores my faith in humanity a bit to hear Robin sit here like "women are not *creatures* women are people" thank you Robin for not being insane

[@Onyrooliver]

I, however, for one, am a horrible creature. Women are cool people, tho. LOVE women. If ur a woman go get yourself something cool, you deserve it.

[@14104]

And this is what can happen if we don't socialize little boys n girls together, as friends, without some parent making romance jokes

[@redfromberk]

​@@Onyrooliveras a fellow absolute monster, i agree

[@Archiv1st]

People are creatures 🤓🤓🤓

[@valenciageode25]

Honestly, other guys need to call out these idiots. A lot of these “Nice Guys” seem to believe that everyone thinks like they do. Everyone has to prove them wrong.

[@ViridianFlow]

2:20 "Women don't like guys with a stable job, they want someone who earns over $100k" How do you imagine them earning $100k without having a stable job?

[@cassandrabelyeu2419]

Are they male porn stars?

[@lilyhawthorne1196]

They probably meant they run a business or something but if you've got to the point in your business where you're making a 100k a year guess what, you've got yourself a stable job lmao

[@MomMom4Cubs]

Drug dealing and/or human trafficking. You know, the usual bad boy trades.

[@taron6858]

@@MomMom4CubsStill technically a stable job you're pulling 100k doing those things

[@destroyraiden]

@@taron6858 And drug dealers still need to pay taxes to the IRS they have a legal method for reporting criminal gotten earnings that they must file so they don't go to jail. And if we ever go into a Fallout situation and the world ends ya'll buckle up the IRS is prepared to become the raiders to take all your shit so the next military hunta leader can have his/her taxes paid!

[@glocknessmonster115]

As a man, I don’t prefer a debt free virgin with tattoos. I prefer another man.

[@Invader19x]

A virgin, debt, and tattoo-free man?

[@glocknessmonster115]

@@Invader19x Just a kind one that’s intelligent.

[@ASweetShortCake]

@@glocknessmonster115These Nice Guys would say your standards are too high lol…

[@MoonyInspired]

Funnily enough....r/suddentlygay

[@glocknessmonster115]

@@ASweetShortCake they struggle with the intelligence part

[@cclepew]

Guarantee you that 16y/o niece was already locking her bedroom door at night, and after that conversation will be staying at a friend's place. She was so creeped out that she called her parents on vacation and told them!

[@ryandouglas5821]

well they were at work not on vacation but ya the point is still valid

[@ahstiasummers5583]

That uncle gave off major "I want to date my niece" sort of vibes

[@bootysniffer226]

hes literally such a creep. having suspicions that an adult relative wants to date you is such a uncomfortable and unsafe feeling. especially because a lot of times, the family tries to excuse, defend, or ignore when sexual assault happens in the family.

[@TheForbiddenChode]

@@bootysniffer226mostly because they won’t believe it. But now the chance of them believing he would is probably much higher in their eyes.

[@TheForbiddenChode]

Hold on im getting word now that the uncle story is possibly rage bait.

[@soundconjurer4380]

Hey, my guys. It's not actually a "friend zone". It's actually the "this guy really creeps me out, so I'll be nice to him so he doesn't kill me" zone. You're no nice guy, you need therapy.

[@Jestrath]

I mean that isn't always the case. Half the time it is literally just because she isn't into you that way and thinks she is letting you down easy. When in all honesty it can be worse to try to be just friends with someone when you still have romantic feelings for.

[@rp.idk.]

so many times! But not always, but that is surely the correct kinda zoning you pointed out

[@dhenderson1810]

Women only create the "friend zone" with guys they consider nice in personality but unattractive in looks.

[@AngelofEresos]

@@Jestrath I mean, *I've* done it before. Sweet boy named Chris. As long as he was happy, I was too y'know? He knew how I felt, and as long as that didn't make him uncomfortable, I was perfectly satisfied just treating him as a very, _very_ fond friend. Love is never wasted, for its value does not rest upon reciprocity.

[@berrymint6384]

or i am ACTUALLY wanting to be friends with him because women and men CAN BE friends because sex is not the only hting that makes a relationship anyhow

[@waitwhat238]

I used to consider the athletes at my school to be stupid, and always thought I was "intellectually superior" But when I actually spoke to them, they were very smart, kind, and usually treated their girlfriends really nicely. I was the one being the asshole. Wish I'd caught on sooner.

[@It-is-me...Melsie]

The man I married (now deceased) was one of the popular jocks in school, and he was one of the kindest, deepest, quick witted, and most gentle of people I've ever known. I knew him in school but we didn't meet up again and marry till many years later. Back then I assumed he was way out of my league, but like all of the other jocks he hung out with he was always nice and friendly to everyone.

[@BiDisaster327]

Yeah, when I was in school I was a bit afraid of them because I was really shy and believed stupid media tropes. But when meeting more people in highschool, a lot of active sports kids were really good in biology for example. Being into sports and physical activity also comes with knowledge of nutrition, anatomy and other health related things! Which makes a lot of sense and I feel stupid for not having that common sense. That trope is insanely stupid

[@DeadGirlsPoem]

You were there, you reflected, you learned and now you are a better person. Best outcome in my opinion.

[@Jestrath]

Wasn't the case for me. Sure there were some good/nice jocks here and there. The vast majority treated me like shit and bullied me. It was never the nerds or gothy people who treated me bad. People who act like the jock asshole thing doesn''t exist probably didn't get relentlessly attacked and bullied throughout school.

[@waitwhat238]

@@Jestrath I did though. Just not by those guys.

[@Revelwoodie]

The "debt free" thing in the first frame -- he's talking about student loans. "Debt free" is redpill code for a woman who hasn't gone to college, i.e. uneducated. Dude is seeking uneducated women.

[@janel.8921]

What if she has a car loan or a mortgage?

[@cftyftyufyfuyfty]

Where are y'all hearing all these dog whistles from???

[@Drago-I-guess]

Yeah, first moment I thought "Fair enough, I wouldn't want a partner who's irresponsible with money either", then I realized that in countries like the US, getting an education and not having rich parents or a full ride scholarship usually equals having to go into debt 😬 Possible they didn't mean it like that, but looking at the virgin thing I kinda doubt it. Especially since I thought mentioning debts especially instead of saying "wasteful" or "bad with money" was a bit random, but like this it makes sense...

[@Drago-I-guess]

@PavlovInPink Thanks for the clarification, that does indeed make it even worse... Now to decide if I look her up or enjoy my mental peace.

[@angygremlin4423]

​@@janel.8921 "Nice Guys" probably wouldn't like that because having her own car and/or house means she'd be less dependent. That means as long as they don't get married, they don't stay together long enough to become common-law spouses (which is already a pretty uncommon thing), or she doesn't put his name on the mortgage/loan paperwork, she'd easily be able to kick him to the curb, keep her house and/or car, and get on with her life. "Nice Guys" don't like that. They want to keep their partners very dependent in at least one way so they feel afraid to stand up for themselves.

[@autisticgirl1614]

I’ve been following the phrase, “If a person is genuinely nice, they don’t have to say they are.” I’ve gotten into two arguments over that quote ever since I’ve started following it. But, on my part, the two were actually nice, they were just mad at me and I thought they weren’t being nice.

[@bumblebeeyellowdragon]

I would say it's more if you have to keep reminding everyone you're nice, you're not a nice person.

[@autisticgirl1614]

@@bumblebeeyellowdragon ok that’s better. I’ll go by that version of the phrase.

[@manhathaway]

Yeah my friend was with someone who was constantly reassuring me that he would never hurt women- because his mom raised him to protect women of course! He would never! But again, both of them felt the need to reiterate that 'fact' constantly. Huge red flag that turned out to be consistent with what I thought. Follow your gut instinct.

[@CainIgneous]

​@@bumblebeeyellowdragon i see you have watched rwby. And honestly: i gave up on humanity a long time ago, because despite being a guy i HATE the stereotypes for all genders. I have begun ignoring peoples existences cuz there is little chance i will talk with people.

[@babowasalwayshere]

Definitely have to agree with bumblebee's take. It can be a little bit dubious to assume someone's a bad person from a one-off incident where they claimed they were nice--some people are just insecure, whether from anxiety or trauma. But definitely if someone repeatedly insists with authority they're a nice person then 9 times out of 10 they're really, really not. Not to be confused with people who need reassurance and ask sincerely if they're a nice person because they need to be reminded. You have a decent outlook already, but I live by a rule of sorts not to live by absolutes. There's some wiggle room nearly anywhere for us to be wrong, so a healthy amount of skepticism is good, but don't let it blind you from the truth. I hope this doesn't come across as an attack, I really think you're doing great! ㅠㅠ

[@yarion4774]

Josh Strife Hayes said it best: Being nice is the bare minimum of human decency. You don't ask to get an award for doing the bare minimum.

[@ChrisBear1989]

Some guys aren't consistent in their so called niceness. Like they don't show their crappy attitude to their girlfriend or "woman they like"

[@doitxi9127]

Josh Is such a Chad, I love him and his videos

[@tdmrebel9818]

hell yea Josh Strife Hayes mentioned!

[@TheDantheman12121]

I always feel these nice guys base their whole life around the fact that they want a girlfriend and cannot get one. Just take a step back and don't worry about it. Go out with friends, go out alone and do not actively try so much. You will likely at some point come across someone where there is a friendship that turns into something more. or maybe you will find someone where you both have an immediate attraction.

[@thegamerthatnoonewanted2621]

Thanks for the advice.

[@14104]

Also want to say, "just be yourself" is generally bad advice to follow, depending on who's following it of course. As someone who's awful, I try to change myself for the better

[@vinnyvangogh2426]

​@@14104that'd still be being yourself, it's just also being the best version of you/trying to better yourself

[@14104]

@@vinnyvangogh2426 Not always. Some people really needa just get rid of parts of who they are, or keep it hidden as much as reasonably possible. Not everyone is born likeable. Most can probably apply to what you say though.

[@14104]

@@vinnyvangogh2426 Some people just need to start over, honestly, rip the whole foundation out

[@TheGoldenDunsparce]

Dude, the Nice Guy around 16 mins was jealous of a 16-year-old girl... The hell is wrong with these guys?!

[@elvingearmasterirma7241]

Ask what isnt wrong with them The list is shorter

[@cftyftyufyfuyfty]

His childhood trauma got activated more likely, not like he wanted to smash his niece. The way he writes doesn't read creepy, it reads sad.

[@chilling_koala]

​@@cftyftyufyfuyfty not getting chosen by girls is not childhood trauma

[@TheoSaurRawr]

​@@chilling_koala it's not, but there *are* childhood traumas that can cause people to act that way

[@marce420.7]

​@@chilling_koala i think if its somehow severe enough, it can still devlop and thats what starts to change certain people, the way they think, their thought proccesing, their empathy levels everything, and then it develops into this with age, its pretty bad, yeah i agree with you i just think it still happens in some cases, which i dont know of because im not everyone and im not around them to see them devolve nor am i a doctor

[@arashi86]

"Stop choosing the guy from the bar, the guy on the bike, the guy who doesn't give a rip" aka "Stop having preferences that I realize I don't fit into because I feel it's not fair to me"

[@theSTRAWBERRYloverX3]

im a nerdy girl and I can say I do not reject like nice guys like that because they have these hobbies, but because they are creepy, entitled, misogynistic, lack personality beyond being so nice and simply rarely respect woman as people. They are the kind to only be nice to the girls they find attractive and their niceness/friendship is Transactional. They see friendship as this lesser, evil, thing as if people do not care for their friends. I've been both the person who has a crush on a friend and been rejected and having to be the one to reject a friend and it is both not pleasent. It is worse however if you learn that your 'friend' had just been waiting for the oportunity to fuck you and did not value you beyond that whatsover.

[@thepragmatist]

Wow. You are 100% correct with this comment. All the best to you.

[@Skulliday]

Trueeee. If you can't value her as a friend you sure as hell won't value her as a partner. Friendship isn't a means to an end, it's an avenue for genuine human connection which is infinitely more valuable than a longshot at a hookup. I've been on both sides of a one sided attraction, thankfully never to the point of having to deal with a limerent individual, and it does supremely suck to be making a new friend only to find that she/he no longer wants to talk to you because you didn't share the same feelings.

[@thepragmatist]

@@Skulliday Completely agree.

[@alejandrogonzalezakamintyt2242]

9:08 has me ugly laughing like imagine just getting texted by someone saying something like "Hey baby, I got the cash, _now act submissive and breedable before me_ "

[@Jeff-ss6qt]

Yeah, that'd be weird. I'd tell them to buy themselves a brain and a personality.

[@foogod4237]

Most women don't give a shit if a guy likes video games and comics. What they don't like is when a guy treats his own hobbies (whatever they are) as being more important than his own (potential) girlfriend's interests and needs, which is pretty much always what these sorts of losers do, and then whine about how no girls are interested in them (gee, I wonder why). And I was a total nerd in high school, but one of my best friends was a football jock, and he was one of the nicest guys in the whole school.

[@letsreadtextbook1687]

Preach 👏

[@squash6497]

Very well said! Many of the women i know play video games. We just don't like condescending attitudes.

[@dhenderson1810]

Why are your hobbies and interests more important than his?

[@theunderstatement6842]

​@@dhenderson1810they're of equal importance is what OP is saying, i think

[@TheOtherCiphbruh]

Ladies and gents, the nice girl’s logic that can cause her to destroy a guy’s personal property because “he cares about his hobbies more than me”.

[@ectothermic]

Nice guy: Don't generalise all men, I'm a nice guy and not like the others, you're probably only interested in jocks. I just never get a chance. I opened the door for you, that means you owe me sex. Also nice guy: Generalises every single woman after interacting with only one and seeing another in a relationship.

[@user-hn4zn9nx3c]

probably stems from not being allowed to be normal friends with girls, or never wanting to just be friends with any women.

[@grutarg2938]

Not to mention generalizing other men too - the "jocks"

[@Sparklyboiii2009]

Moral of the story is: don't generalize anyone

[@ectothermic]

@@Sparklyboiii2009 Speaking generally, here. Don't generalise. It's always bad, generally.

[@Sparklyboiii2009]

@@ectothermic true

[@its_jasonBSF]

i was scared the niece one would go a different way

[@elvingearmasterirma7241]

same God. I am still ready to call the cops tho!

[@Queen_Homu]

I thought this was gonna be the guy who forced his niece to go on a date with some guy who was nice to her that she was friends with but not interested in

[@TheBonkleFox]

I'm still scared of the way it went. I can hear the sounds of Alabama

[@It-is-me...Melsie]

Just putting it out there, I'd choose the guy at the bar and/or the guy on the bike as long as he's a good human over the church guy any day.

[@MeemahSN]

The church guy likely holds some… unkind beliefs.

[@Anonymous-wb2yc]

@@MeemahSN You're just giving the "Niceguys" power, you realise this, right? Good job making a comment, but not this one, hey?

[@Dizzii_Lizzii]

​@@MeemahSN I think I see what u mean

[@saintdude6032]

Plus, how do they know the biker/guy at the bar don't go to church 🤨 I seen more bikers at chruch then anything

[@xXMindSoulXx]

@Anonymous-wb2yc Please elaborate, you sound like a toddler talking themselves in circles right now.

[@willnaib]

the thing about wanting to date a virgin is there’s definitely situations where it’s an understandable preference, like if you’re a virgin and you’d prefer to date another virgin so you both start at the same level of (in)experience. but that’s almost never where these guys are coming from, it’s always this STANDARD for a REAL WOMAN which, when combined with the fact that they seem to always want a woman as young as they can get away with that’s small and naive, is absolutely disgusting.

[@bumblebeeyellowdragon]

If you have a focus on needing a virgin you're a predator. There's no exception to that.

[@user-ot6fr9kk3l]

Basically they want a young virgin girl because they don't want you to know if their bad in bed or not because You willl have no previous relationships to compare also harder to spot their red flags and manipulation.

[@letsreadtextbook1687]

Yeah in their context, they just want someone who they can manipulate and objectivy

[@amandabushore7890]

They want a girl that doesn't know that their pp small

[@m.poppins4843]

No its just double standards. Women can date "bad guys" because they have daddy issues but men arent allowed to have insecurities without being treated like they're the next Ted Bundy.

[@SaltyMouse10]

I married the "nice guy". He was emotionally and financially abusive shit that had multiple online affairs and spent thousands on cam girls, but because he was "nice" he painted himself as the victim.

[@empressmarowynn]

Part of the whole wanting a virgin thing is wanting someone who is extremely inexperienced in dating so they can basically do what they want to the person and gaslight them into thinking it's normal. Also they probably know they're terrible in bed and again someone inexperienced won't know just how bad it is.

[@nathanmcbow158]

Yeah, I could not care less if someone I end up meeting has been in a previous relationship or not.

[@melodi996]

Well, I know some people love experienced partners, but most people would like to go through love as a first experience for both in the couple, I wouldn't want to be compared to somebody else, and it's just eww if you think he/she did with somebody else, my husband wasn't a virgin, but I wouldn't lose anything if he was, sex isn't that hard of a thing that you need to read manuals or do it with many people to achieve good results.

[@LemonBarProductions]

Even as a virgin, I knew when someone was terrible in bed. Virginity has NOTHING to do with it.

[@PieMister02]

Most of these guys aren't very experienced themselves, so the appeal of somebody with a similar range of experience kinda makes sense. The older you get without being experienced in that department the more shameful it can feel.

[@aydenlegleiter7810]

and I genuinely fail to see why making conditions that encourage mutual happiness by removing from your dating pool the women with the experiences that encourage cheating and undesired behaviors is a bad thing.

[@esmeraldaloschuetz9120]

The uncle was not "concerned" for the niece, he was projecting his own bitter resentments and insecurities about dating and women onto a child in his care. So damn gross, I can't even.

[@lafarfalla2273]

The "must be a virgin" mentality stems from two things I'd say, no.1 a desire for exclusivity (which shouldn't really matter) and no.2 from insecurity, because let's face it the guy is most likely a virgin himself and would think it's intimidating

[@OctyabrAprelya]

I'd say it's also two things, not mutually exclusive, but also not necessarily going together: A physical aspect: the fetishization of female virginity (i.e. the hymen) also tied to a rather unhealthy obsession of youth, so to speak. A psychological one: since these people, I think, are very immature / stunted, the idea of having to establish a relationship with a person the same age as them terrifies them.

[@UniqueBreakfastTaco]

Lol...so much overthinking. Men generally don't like wh0res. Fairly straightforward

[@Crazyratman]

Could be religious reasons also

[@DeadGirlsPoem]

Seems to be objectifying for me as well. They want a "new" girl/wife. One that hasn't been "used" before. Like a new car or something. A new fancy product you get at the store to show off with. What i love most is if they don't have a problem with having been in a relationship or not being a virgin anymore for themselves, but expect that from their girlfriend...

[@MeemahSN]

@@DeadGirlsPoem it’s just sexism and hypocrisy hidden by fancy air fresheners.

[@alexisgrunden1556]

On the whole 'debt-free virgins' thing: "debt-free" is just coded language for _'I don't want a girl who's gone to college, because I hate women who are smarter than me, could out-earn me and make me feel like less of a man, and and she's already learned critical thinking skills, so she won't fall for my manipulations and lies'_ and wanting a virgin is because if she's never slept with another guy before, then he's automatically the best lay she's ever had. Doesn't matter if he couldn't find the clit with a roadmap, halogen flashlight and approach radar; if she has no other experience, then he's still automatically the best sex she's ever had by default. And if you've only known abusive relationships (any type of abuse), then that's how your normalcy meter gets calibrated; that's what's 'normal' to you, ie, he can gaslight her into thinking that however he treats her is a 'healthy' relationship.

[@HenriZwols]

Or he's a virgin himself and would like someone with similar life experience. It gets creepy if a non-virgin only wants virgins.

[@subratanandy2142]

I'm a virgin , debt fee and tattoo free woman. I have encountered many of these men and decided that I would rather remain a virgin than get together with any of them .🤣

[@R1ptide_Drag0n]

Oooh I thought they meant gambling debt. That's horrible, everything is horrible with these guys

[@GraceRamsey-fd8lp]

"Doesn't matter if he couldn't find the clit with a roadmap, halogen flashlight and approach radar" I am saving this insult for later. *chef kiss*

[@Franzifii]

​@@subratanandy2142Haha, definitely understand that! I personally daydream about having a tattoo to repel these dudes who have a weird obsession with purity.

[@katoarin1575]

Without Emkay I would have gone down a dark path and would have been on this subreddit for sure,so Thanks

[@demonchild1471]

Glad you’re doing better. Life is like the word bus, it’s bs without u

[@MadameRaven1]

Emkay is the anti-Andrew Tate and I love them for it.

[@littleladybrooks6635]

​@@MadameRaven1The AntiTate, if you will.

[@lukelyall5879]

@@littleladybrooks6635we need KZbin & Instagram accounts for this

[@denverarnold6210]

​@@littleladybrooks6635Anti-drew?

[@Koifishyy.]

7:56 ITS GIVING "you wont like me when im angry..." *turns into an alpha wolf demon lord hybrid*

[@sailormoonfan224]

5:50 oh god, that poor teenager. Jesus christ. Good on her for standing up for herself.

[@oren1305]

I'd be so mad at my sibling or sibling in law if they spoke to my kids like that.

[@justaponyyy]

0:21 because it romanticises older men having relationships with young women. there are whole video essays about that topic, the normalisation of this and how girls are sexualized and yet have their sexuality treated as naughty and a crime, how they should be happy when older men are into them, how "boys mature slower" and "boys will be boys" while girls are expected to have their emotions under control. actually watched an essay about this earlier today and it's so very creepy. but yes the virgin thing is also a part of this misogynistic gross thing

[@spongebobsexypants]

7:08 I'm sorry, what? At least your dog or cat doesn't cheat on you? Someone needs to find this "guy" and call animal services.

[@rithvikmuthyalapati9754]

Yeah that was sus

[@GraceRamsey-fd8lp]

*Ahem* I am calling both the police AND animal services on this guy.

[@supermario7268]

He obviously mean that the cat wont leave for another person i reslly dont think he was doinh strange strange strange stuff to it

[@GraceRamsey-fd8lp]

@@supermario7268 Im glad you still have some faith in humanity...

[@fixedly]

The thing is, 'nice' is just a baseline. It's not all that there is. A person can be nice but can be boring, indecisive, jealous, pessimistic etc. If 'nice' is the only thing you have to offer, try harder. You still need to bring something else to the table, have some interests, be kind to people, know what you want from life, be decisive and not a door mat. And I also wholeheartedly agree with not judging a book by its cover, e.g. jocks. My boyfriend looks badass and has tattoos but he has the geekiest hobbies and interests and is a total nerd. Maybe if they actually spoke to people, men AND women, they'd realise how various and interesting some people are.

[@ASweetShortCake]

I was thinking the same thing! You’re right, niceness is just the base. Life is complex, and so are people. There’s more to someone than just “nice.”

[@wowjennawow]

great point!

[@nathanmcbow158]

The old saying, "Do not judge a book by it´s cover" still applies.

[@ginnyjones7120]

Here are my two cents on nice people: I'm not impressed by someone being nice. Most people are nice. Serial killers act nice; that's how they fool everybody for years at a time and lure their victims. Same with child molesters; they act nice and normal, which is how they deceive the children's parents for years at a time and gain access to the children. Nice doesn't mean a damn thing. The only thing that nice indicates is that a person knows how to blend in without drawing negative attention to themself. What impresses me is kindness and respect, and there are usually clues to indicate whether someone is truly kind and respectful or not. True kindness does not discriminate or seek a reward. If someone is sincerely kind, they'll treat everyone with kindness, rather than just their friends or people they're interested in. They'll be kind to their friends, family, love interests, strangers, waiters, beggars, and everyone else. Further, a truly kind person won't expect to be compensated for their kindness, and they won't stop being kind just because they aren't getting what they want. Another clue is that genuinely kind people don't generally brag about being kind because they aren't doing it for attention. When a kind person buys lunch for a homeless person, nobody knows about it. When a kind person helps an injured animal, nobody knows about it. When a kind person adopts a foster child, nobody knows about it. When a kind person volunteers to help clean the neighborhood, help out in a nursing home, or help disabled children, nobody knows about it. (This isn't to say that the kind person never tells anyone about any of their good deeds, just that they don't brag about their good deeds.) True respect does not coerce and is not entitled. A respectful person won't try to pressure you into doing something that you already said you don't want to do. Instead, a respectful person will accept it when you say "no" or "I'm not comfortable with that" because they understand that you're a person just like them and that you have all the same rights that they have. Further, a truly respectful person won't act entitled to your time, attention, physical space, belongings, etc. Instead, the respectful person will appreciate it when you share your time, attention, physical space, belongings, etc. with them because they understand that those things belong to you and that you're the one who makes the decisions regarding your time, your attention, your personal space, your belongings, etc. (This isn't to say that a respectful person won't have any expectations or boundaries of their own, just that they'll respect other people's boundaries too.) Another clue is that when a respectful person apologizes to you, they won't act like you're too sensitive or like you're the one who needs to apologize to them. Instead, they'll apologize for their words or behavior because they understand that you don't deserve to be mistreated any more than they do. This is just my opinion in the matter, though.

[@fixedly]

@@ginnyjones7120 spot on!

[@ladyalicent705]

“I did all of this because I wanted to seem like a decent guy, I only wanted one thing from you” is such a terrifying line. It’s like something you might hear in a R rated horror movie, only it’s real, *and that’s what makes it scary…*

[@QueenMonny]

It's not really terrifying for me. They would have to work damn hard to get that (and looking how I do, I doubt any would be that persistent). But it is disgusting and saddening. I feel sorry for the women who have to actively be on alert for that kind of thing. I have a natural filtration system. Deploys automatically. Advantages of being a 4 on a good day. Maybe a 5. 😅🤷🏻‍♀️

[@marce420.7]

​@@QueenMonny i don't understand you're comment with the way it's worded but i only got the first parr, and that is a terrifying thing to hear how would it not be it just is

[@QueenMonny]

@@marce420.7 It was just a long winded reply that essentially said "a guy would have to work hard to get sex from me, and based on how I look, not many would be persistent enough to put in that much effort. How I look is my natural defence mechanism against being raped too, because they wouldn't be interested in me. Sorry if I confused you. I find the possibility of being raped terrifying, I just don't feel it's a very likely possibility. Especially where I live. Small towns have that one advantage maybe.

[@paintbrush3554]

Basically admiting that he was putting on a facade and knows he's not actually a decent guy. He wanted to pretend to be one long enough to get s*x which is manipulative af. But yet is extremely common and socially tolerated. I think it should stop

[@ladyalicent705]

@@QueenMonny I disagree with you when you say that how you look defends you from rape. These days, people often tell me I’m very attractive, but when I was raped at the age of 13, I wasn’t attractive, I was actually considered plain and boring at best and downright ugly at worst. The group of boys who did it didn’t do it because they found me attractive, I can guarantee you that. They did it because I was autistic, had no friends and was an extremely popular target for bullying, so they not only knew that I wouldn’t tell, but even if I did tell, people wouldn’t believe me. They did it because they thought they could get away with it, and in many ways, they did. They did it because they knew that they had the power too. Rape isn’t about physical attraction, it’s about power, which is why the rates stay consistent all year round rather than quadrupling in summer and halving in winter. If you’ve never been assaulted, it’s because you’re extremely lucky, not because of your looks, or perceived lack thereof. I’m sorry that you don’t have confidence in yourself, however.

[@davidvanvlerah7825]

Y'know, when I was young, I truly was a nice guy, and I really was treated like garbage and taken advantage of regularly. But I say that I really was a nice guy, because I always attributed my problems to the fact that I was painfully shy and unbelievably gullible, not that everyone was terrible. I was an extremely unpopular kid in school, but I knew that I wasn't owed anything by anyone, and once I started being myself and stopped trying to be what I thought everyone else wanted, my life improved dramatically. If you are one of these pathetic wretches, I implore you to look deep within and ask yourself, "Am I being genuine, or just projecting an image?" Trust me, fake is way easier to spot than you think. Peace

[@ViridianFlow]

It's one of the truths of growing up. Especially during your teen years, with all those hormones screwing with your mind is easy to THINK you're doing everything right but if you actually looked back on yourself as an adult, you'd likely be cringing at almost everything you used to do. So many people who think they were nice actually just didn't have a mind that was functioning well enough to notice their toxicity. Thankfully most people grow out of it

[@SaltyMouse10]

If you have to constantly tell people you're "nice" it's because your behavior/actions have shown otherwise.

[@lynxlubbpeeps]

There's a difference between the now popular phrase 'nice guy' and the term 'good guy'. Nice is just a behavior that could hide some real BS toxicity. It's surface. Peeps gotta learn to be a good guy. Thanks for not being one of the 'nice guys'

[@ItsYaBoiV]

I mean, not to defend "nice guys" but I'm kind of a creature. A beastie. A lil goblin. I got gremlin energy.

[@elvingearmasterirma7241]

We are creatures in the sense Those Men wont like We skitter and scuttle

[@turbo8628]

Gremlin energy 🤣 What does that mean?

[@ASweetShortCake]

Lol 😂

[@99baking]

Going a little goblin mode, as a treat

[@chelseahuddle557]

@@turbo8628 It means we like shiny things, slimy stuff, dark spaces, dirt, carrying random assorted treasures and trinkets in our pockets/bag, etc.

[@0BucketMask0]

I actually appreciate the fact that Robin is the one who reads this specific sub and others like it because listening to a cis guy call these fuckers out on their bullshit is so satisfying, and you can tell that he means every word of it

[@LeadrynMcKrotch]

10:59 i was terribly unpopular in high school. One time while at school i found out my dad had a heart attack(he ended up fine but i was practiced and scared in the moment) i tried to hide in the stairwell people tended to not use so i could cry and collect myself. 5 of the most popular guys in school found me, and then proceeded to do their best to make me feel better. It was nice. But they were popular because they were just those kind of people.

[@Adraeth]

Robin, the virgin obsession is sending alarm bells because those guys, most of the time, when they say that, also mean "very young". And the longer they say it, the lower the number they have in mind seems to actually be.

[@aydenlegleiter7810]

that may or may not be because women have a trend of becoming not-virgins younger and younger, so they have to look younger and younger to be sure that they are

[@Adraeth]

@@aydenlegleiter7810 Are you seriously trying to justify creeps trying to pretend they should be allowed to go after underaged girls...?

[@aydenlegleiter7810]

@@Adraeth I'm saying that I understand where the 'very young' comes from, not that I agree with it

[@kaw8473]

Word of advice: If your entire personality can be summed up with the word "nice," you're doing it wrong. Choose 2 or 3 personality traits to exemplify so a lady will describe you like "he invited me over and showed me how make the perfect sushi roll, has a great sense of humor and knows the best places to see concerts."

[@nathanmcbow158]

Well said, for example, I would describe myself and a bit shy but focused, as well as being an open book, with very few things in my life I truly keep secret. That alone says a lot more than generalizing "nice".

[@equivalentconcept1403]

As a woman myself, the fact I share a species with these nitwits is embarrassing. No, you’re not as nice as you think you are. No, women don’t intentionally go for obviously crappy men. Most of us are smart enough to see a red flag from a mile away, which is why you never get a chance. Seriously, it’s like they watch too many movies and TV just like Robin said and it’s skewed their perception of reality.

[@This-is-a-commentt]

Sorry you have to be in the same species, I would be too, I’d rather be a…. Actually no, being any other animal will get me shot and killed by hunters… wait assassins exist… sorry this turned really morbid 😭

[@Kingpetty01]

So you mean to tell me the brotherhood of assassins from assassin's Creed doesn't exist damn

[@kiwicastro405]

People can be quite creepy sometimes (no matter if its a guy or girl or anything in between)

[@White_Breeder]

nothing in between

[@pennyforyourthots]

​@@White_Breederyou're right. Agender people are outside the binary, not in it. Glad to see an ally.

[@White_Breeder]

@@pennyforyourthots There is only male/man, and female/woman. Everything else is a defect. Also, agender is not real.

[@cynister7384]

​@@White_BreederEven if we speak completely, strictly, 100% biologically, you're still wrong.

[@White_Breeder]

@@cynister7384 Prove it.

[@2006PoyotaKirbolla]

Seeing these people makes me sad cause i get how they feel, how it feels to be alone and jealous but it doesn’t mean you get to put down other people and not be a decent person its not an excuse to hate women just calm down and face yourself even if it’s hard.

[@ASweetShortCake]

Honestly, sometimes I find myself thinking similarly to how these guys think. It’s not the exact same thoughts for the exact same reasons (I’ve never been an “all women are stupid and go for the a-hole jocks!” type of person), but sometimes I feel like “(Insert here) are all bad people, and everyone like them takes advantage of my patience, compassion, and empathy! I’m going to get super mean because they’re all bad people and I just don’t care anymore!” But then I don’t, and you know why I don’t? I stop, and I check in on myself. I don’t really feel that way! I’m just upset from holding in my anger for too long. You shouldn’t hurt other innocent people just because you’ve been hurt in the past! Having been hurt is no excuse!

[@nathanmcbow158]

I am almost 28 and I am yet to meet someone I like in that fashion. I do know who I am though and I am quite proud of who I have become. I would never betray my beliefs by seeing someone else as an object or anything less than human, plus I will never resort to the demeaning and miserable worldview that these "Niceguys" have. That is a big part of who I define myself as and that belief alone keeps me going strong.

[@SamanthaManning-xy8fu]

And the frustrating thing is that nice guys go on about their insecurities like girls can’t relate. Getting rejected by someone you find attractive is part of the human experience and something most people can relate to. However, you don’t hate people for rejecting you. You just be strong and have faith that the world is a diverse place and that there is a companion just right for you. In the meantime cultivating independence and learning to be happy on your own is valuable. Nice guys act like they’re the only ones who can relate to rejection and heartbreak.

[@supermario7268]

So true i am always jealous its my number 1 personality trait. Instead of making fun of jocks and bad guys that they make uo in their head they should bring themselves down like me. I tryed so many times ti get a date and nothing works so now i give up dating because 0 women like me🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@lauras.9294]

The virgin thing is creepy on a few different levels: 1. These types of men view women as possessions and if someone else had sex with a woman before them, they basically have this thing like "someone touched something that belongs to me, now it's ruined" 2. They want specifically young women and girls and the younger a person is, the more likely they are to be a virgin the concept of virginity itself is stupid and rooted in those two ideas as well. Just disgusting

[@Alak-Hul_Darkblade]

I don’t believe they want them for relationship purposes, but to sacrifice them to gain enough power to summon their anime demon girlfriend

[@lauras.9294]

@@Alak-Hul_Darkblade yeah, that makes sense too

[@sadrabbit53]

Being "pre-touched" or "pre-owned" isn't even bad. If I got a piece of rad cake and someone licked off the frosting, I'd still eat that cake. ...Sorry, it's 3am and I'm hungry

[@OrionoftheStar]

I always assumed the virgin thing was because they were afraid they'd suck at sex and didn't want their partner yearning for sex with people who were bigger and/or more skilled at it. I mean, most of these people are probably virgins themselves, they're hoping for a partner who won't realize that they're terrible in bed. Which is a separate kind of dehumanization, as it assumes that women would only care about men who were good at sex, and not about other aspects of the relationship...

[@genxrants]

The guys posting on forums about women going after "toxic narcissistic guys" don't seem to understand that they are the "toxic narcissistic guys" that women should avoid. The only difference between them and the ones women actually date (and later complain about) is that they are bad at hiding their toxic narcissisitic selves.

[@letsreadtextbook1687]

Lol true

[@ashwinnmyburgh9364]

I cannot say how much I hate this whole "game" culture. The fact that these guys see women as nothing more than a way of getting sex is just disgusting. They are people, treat them as such. The fact that they put "effort" into a relationship specifically to sleep with the girl and nothing more is just...how do you think that way?

[@mrtrollnator123]

I agree

[@WhatABinglylittlescronklylil-]

It’s like they genuinely believe the entirety of women are stereotypes of pretty girls you see in television. It’s mind numbing how ignorant they are to the fact people are people regardless of gender, and not some transactional machine you treat nice in order to get screwed

[@matthiasplatz5919]

When people are starved for something, it can dominate their thoughts. The whole thing becomes a sad Catch-22.

[@AlysaAlysaBolissaBananaFannaFe]

​@@matthiasplatz5919 Right, but if you're trying to satisfy a deprivation, you find a way that works rather than demand the nature of reality bends to your will. It's like having your only option for food be growing a crop from a seed but then trying to over water it in order for it to grow by your standards. It doesn't work that way. The control issues are off the charts.

[@DembaiVT]

You hit it on the head with saying its about TV. but it's any media really. Writers use stereotypes, and their writing isn't required to be logical. Between those two things, chasing down a person in an airport is controlling behavor. Doxxing a person to show up in the middle of the night to stand there and scream 'i love you' outside their house is TERRIFYING. Buying into thise narratives reinforces the idea that everything is like that and the behaviors shown aren't just acceptable but EXPECTED. and as a person raised on that garbage, i hated dating and being in relationships because it all felt so awful and unnatural. Eventually talked it over with potential partners and discovered someone who also hates all that...before realizing BOTH of us had bought into these narritives. Real life relationships aren't like the movies, vids, books, and green texts. They aren't, and you need to keep your expectations on that level

[@pennyforyourthots]

It's probably also worth noting that a lot of these tropes are pretty old, with a lot of them popping up around the 60s-80s, and as a result they reflect a very narrow, sterilized version of society trying to sell you the "American dream" from back then. Also, speaking from personal experience, I'd be willing to bet that some amount of these nice guys are neurodivergent in some way, and as a result this type of media is even more impactful because it's essentially misinformation about social rules that you already struggle trying to learn.

[@Anonymous-wb2yc]

What we need is writers who take relationships seriously and write them realistically and screen writers who don't try to cram all of that realism into a 2-3 hour movie. Or a 12part, 45min episode series. 24eps... m-maybe?

[@Kaeros77]

​@pennyforyourthots3400 As a neurodivergent (Diagnosed as both Autistic and ADHD) person (AFAB [nonbinary]), unless they had literally no one else around them to base what's expected of them or how they should act, I'm not sure why they'd think movies or tv are realistic when it comes to those behaviors or how they should act around others. Sure, I got confused and expected my life to go a certain way (get my license, go to prom, graduate, college, get a job, start a family- in that order, and it definitely did not work out that way at all for me), and would believe the 'jocks are bad' type of thinking too- but to think that acting like a horrible person is expected and wanted by others- I just can't see it. Maybe it's because I wasn't raised as a guy, but I never once expected someone to behave poorly or behave like someone in the movies. I never thought I needed to act like the girls I saw in the movies either. I've never watched or read anything fictional and thought that it was okay to do in real life, that it's expected, or that it's real. Fictional things shouldn't be confused with reality, neurodivergent or not, I can't understand the confusion. Instead of them being neurodivergent, it's more likely that they didn't have people around them to teach them the right behaviors, or they flat out had someone teaching them the WRONG behaviors. It's also likely that they just got hurt by someone, and ended up seeing all the 'nice guy' or 'alpha male' stuff online, making them think the only way to get better and get over the person, is to become a rude and sexist person, as those communities tend to prey on young, heartbroken, or lonely guys.

[@callumprice1710]

There are some books that do relationships well. Unfortunately nearly of them will not be books that supposedly show it. Like if the book claims its a love story, its probably not gonna show accurate ones. If its maybe fantasy story about killing dragons, or like sci fi space pirates, they might actually have decent relationships. Not always but a better chance than love story books.

[@DarksideGmss0513]

There is some truth to what you see on TV, and books, etc. but it typically tends to be over-exaggerated.

[@dehlilanaomilohnert429]

Uncle was mad creepy “nice guys like me never get a chance” why would you say that to your niece!?

[@BrutalJambon]

I was this kind of guy when I was 13 to like 17 - basically exclusively because some of my friends & other guys at school were dating and the (very few) girls I asked rejected me. I'm so glad I've been able to come to my senses. I was never aggressive or a bitch to girls and never went on rants, but my inner monologue was definitely "I'm TOO nice and they only want to date a-holes, I'm FRIENDZONED. Nice guys finish last" and stuff like that. *Strangely enough* when in HS I stopped victimizing myself all the time about this and took chances early on with girls & boys that interested me, I got somewhere.

[@maxgoldstein7202]

A good mentality and sense of self esteem are a hell of a drug

[@thomasendter6770]

I have to admit, I was this type of boy too. :/ I lack the experience now, but at least, I realized some of the flaws in my world view. Better late than never, I guess. And better single than a "Niceguy".

[@marce420.7]

​@@thomasendter6770 exactly you are better than them because you understood your flaws and changed them some guy told me he was gonna k*** me after i told him he was making me uncomfortable like, i don't- understand? why are they this selfish but, the fact that you can change and acknowledged it means you have more respect and empathy than any of these boys ive had to talk to.. or forced to talk to, i have a fear of men and i don't like it because i know they're not all bad but i still shake when i have to stand or hold a conversation with a boy my age, and they.. like still don't take it seriously-

[@supermario7268]

Im still like this after highschool LOL!!!! Girls just dont like me for some reason LOL i never say stuff like girls only want 6ft rich gigachad but im still single somehow doesn't matter anyways because i give up on dating. Im got changes sides to date dudes. Ill just wait until women go after me. Its about time women do it because if guy does it its "creepy" for reasons i dont know. Oh well if god wants me to date he wouldve gave me an angel already but i guess he doesnt want me to! Oh well🤷🏾‍♂️

[@supermario7268]

Oops i mean to say im NOT CHANGEING SIDES. Im still straight LOL

[@lumiko5183]

I gave the nice guy a chance and turns out, he didn't take no for an answer with sexual things. Second nice guy I dated got really angry if I gave any criticism about his country (e.g. one time it was because I made a joke about his keyboard not having certain letters in it). When he was angry, he would take any of my vulnerabilities, failures and insecurities and try to use them as weapons to purposefully hurt me. The third guy I dated and am still dating, refuses to take any care of himself and his appearance (including brushing his teeth and other basic hygiene things) because "as a man he doesn't need to do those things". I'm really considering not dating any men at this point.

[@lumiko5183]

Also I would like someone to tell me if my standards are too high since I think all of the previously mentioned things are a big no in a relationship. Are these just the kind of things you're supposed to make sacrifices for?? Is the bar really at the bottom of the ocean?

[@grenade8572]

​@@lumiko5183Your standards are not too high, according what you're saying here: you're just looking for a decent guy. I even find you very permissive! It's great to give the "nice guy" a chance... but giving a chance should be IMO just giving time to show you who thet really are (some nice guys are just shy and show their qualities if they know you are genuinly interested by them). That should NOT mean let them treating you like crap (you have right so say as many NO as you want regarding to sex, ans tou must be heard), have really poor hygiene or whatever.

[@dhenderson1810]

​@@grenade8572But you care more about if he lives up to Your standards, and meets Your criteria. Maybe you need to think what you can give back to the relationship as well, not just what he can do for you. It also means that you don't just wait until he does something nice first before you respond. Do something nice for him because you want to, because you love him. Too many here look at what they want, what they think they deserve, rather than being the best you that you can be and being a good partner to them as well. Look, you either love the guy or you don't. If you do, then maybe don't focus on superficial negatives (like cleanliness) all the time.

[@grenade8572]

@@dhenderson1810 You're right: both person of the couple has to bring their own qualities and love. But it doesn't mean tolerate everything. Both partners have their standards. According to their personal choices, some criterias are not important, other are negociable, the last must be respected. Both partners have to establish their standards, negociate what can be necociate and, if they're too many incombatibilities, they'll split up..

Yikes! I would say that _I_ don't care too much about my appearance, but to me that means, _"I will wear sweatpants at home"_ not _"I don't take care of my personal hygiene"!_ :-O

[@Woopsdiditagain]

The guy talking about his niece was just projecting his own insecurities onto her wtf

[@gothcsm]

As a woman, I literally love dudes that play video games and have “nerdy” hobbies! I genuinely don’t get why SO many men think that women despise those types of things when in reality, PLENTY of women absolutely adore nerdier guys, and a lot of us secretly like nerdy things too! If these guys just stopped surrounding themselves solely with women who DO hate those things, then they would have figured that out by now! Stuff like that goes both ways and they need to realize that because they’re most likely acting the same exact way as the girls they talk about, only hanging around girls they find super attractive who screw them over constantly 🤷🏻‍♀️

"No, strange guys only say things like that" Couldnt have said it better myself.

[@juances]

Sometimes I worry Robin will go full on joker from reading too much reddit. Thanks for making it funny because if I took a look at this sub without your commentary I'd find it depressing lol

[@sleepy-emerald]

The virgin thing might be uncomfortable because when paired with things like "small" and "no body hair" and what have you, they're basically describing a child.

[@RagingMoon1987]

Congrats to the sixteen-year-old niece! She's got a creep for an uncle just like I do. Seriously, some of the things he's said to me over the years make me want to set him on fire. I'm 35 and a chick, by the way.

[@AFarmerCalledChicken]

“They LOVE uncertainty” Bro. I have a severe anxiety disorder and I’m always in uncertainty… And I’m not lovin it

[@Shocked_Joe]

as a woman, i agree. we do in fact like video games and comics.

[@letsreadtextbook1687]

Can confirm we do have these disproportionate hourglass figure and do not cover our vitals in armor

[@HeathenHusband]

Seeing this subreddit just makes me sad, I've been a victim of abuse, but that doesn't entitle me to being an asshole to other people, no matter how much trauma I go through I refuse to adopt a "nice guy" mentality

[@HeathenHusband]

Anyway haha funny hand man is funny, nothing but love for the emkay editors ❤

[@crystalburch2114]

One more, because this 'nice guy' shit makes me sick after my own personal experience. Because I did 'give the nice guy a chance '. My literal best friend for over a year, that I always thought of as family. The nicest guy I had ever known. I wanted to keep a platonic relationship because I really loved and respected him and cherished our

[@crystalburch2114]

Our friendship, he insisted on changing that after over a year of hanging out. I finally gave in, and within a couple months, he became obsessive, violent and abusive, as well as cheating, and in the end I ended up losing a friend, as well as years of trauma and mistrust of the intentions of anyone coming into my life after I was thankfully lucky enough to have a real friend to help me work through. But I will tell you, red flags or not, there's a reason these type of guys especially are overlooked for 'more than friends'

[@nathanmcbow158]

@@crystalburch2114 Ouch... Man... That sounds absolutely horrible. I for one can not even remotely comprehend of someone's mindset that resorts to that kind of behavior, ever. Glad you had friends to help you out of that mess.

[@falcon4359]

​@@crystalburch2114 So sad to hear that, I hope you're doing better. I just want to say choosing the "nice guy" isn't a technically a thing & shouldn't coz you're always going to choose someone who is nice to you and treats you nicely its not your fault for giving them a chance if they end up being assholes later.

[@dhenderson1810]

​@@crystalburch2114Maybe you changed things too much. Women suddenly want to stop just doing what they did as friends and want a commitment straight away. They want the next frtu years planned out, instead of chilling. They always feel that the guy owes them for giving them a second of attention.

[@tandzilebhembe1255]

@@dhenderson1810bold of you to assume that all that happened was that he showed his true self after he got what he wanted.

[@becca53444]

What “nice guys” will never understand is no woman is attracted to someone with fragile self esteem and a victim complex. We pick up that energy instantly and want nothing to do with you. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and entitled to a relationship, and then maybe you’ll find one.

[@ghostskull6368]

Reformed niceguy mentality here, if you're not a dick and you put yourself out there, you'll find someone eventually. Don't push too hard on any specific person to be with you, it's a bad look and won't garner any results. Just be ACTUALLY nice.

[@elvingearmasterirma7241]

Whenever someone threatens sui*ide when you say: I dont wanna date you Dont feel bad. Theyre trying to emotionally guiltrip you. Just ignore them.

[@HML_Secondary]

I semi recently got ghosted by a girl who I had a crush on for 8 years after asking her out on a date, but I swear to God I will never be like these people.

[@Imaslutforpuns]

Hey at least you tried, I’m proud of you bro

[@not_you_i_dont_even_know_you]

Aw that's rough. Your loyalty is a great asset and will be appreciated by someone down the line ❤️

[@HML_Secondary]

@embeeoh222 Thank you. I'm feeling a bit better, since this happened like 6 weeks ago, but I'm still not fully mentally there yet.

[@mrtrollnator123]

​@@HML_Secondaryyou handled the rejection extremely well 👏

[@HML_Secondary]

@mrtrollnator123 Thank you so much, I still feel like shit but I started taking better care of myself. You can imagine that it's tough, but I'm holding up ok.

[@prismatica-the-strange]

1:02 you see, I AM a creature, just... not in the sexually pleasing object way he means. I am the goblin hiding behind your washing machine stealing your socks :)

[@ammygamer]

I think those guys are seriously thinking, I dunno, that an exaggerated version of a preteen's girl impressionable romantic brain is an accurate description of a woman's wants. I've been in a very stable relationship for 11 years now, but if you look at the characters I'm most interested in in games (I'm a huge rpg fan) they are usually full of drama and danger. But here's the thing, I know that's FICTION. It's a safe way for me to explore pretend scenarios, to exercise my empathy and creativity for those characters without making mine or anyone else's real life a Shakespearean drama. Just like enjoying war or espionage movies doesn't mean you want to actually take on arms and kill people, but it's enjoyable because it makes you put your life in perspective, those romantic fantasies helped to realize that I would **never** choose a partner like that. That whole perilous drama is only "fun" because it's safely contained within in a book, because it's READING not LIVING, and if I'm ever uncomfortable and decide to close it it's over for good. It won't come back to bite my ass, or worse. I'm very, **very** happy with my very much normal and loving fiance thank you very much.

[@Drago-I-guess]

You say it. I'd be way less comfortable with some of my favorite game characters if there wasn't a screen between us. And on the other hand I'd love to be real life friends with many of the characters I tend to perceive as boring in the game setting. If someone tried to flirt with me by analyzing and imitating my favorite fictional characters I'd leave the country and start a new life. Don't use fiction for reference, people!

[@Foop6570]

Escapism is the word, it isn't reality

[@zombathinlostleghackercat5233]

Maybe the virgin thing is a jealousy thing, or not wanting her to think there's someone else who's better, or even just wanting to gatekeep and be the only one who's done it so you can feel special.

[@wnxter]

seeing this subredit brings me joy but now im terrified since I have just experienced a nice guy whom scared me.

[@nathanmcbow158]

Ouch. Hope you got a plan for dealing with that. Good luck.

[@wnxter]

@@nathanmcbow158 honestly dont know how to handle him he keeps making account and trying to pursue me then insult me

[@Interstellar.1]

​@@wnxterblock his ass

[@rithvikmuthyalapati9754]

@@wnxter Make a post warning people about him. Then he will back off

[@wnxter]

-- So I asked a bunch of my frienda to report his accounts that he had made to try talk to me or stalk me with. I'm really hoping he would stop becaus whats more scary for me is that he dragging along my 1 year old child on his rants and threats. I have saved the screenshots in case he goes back here in PH since i believe he is somewhere else in asia too, so that id be able to file a restraning order to him.

[@worstkiterchan9207]

Funfact: women LOVE nerdy and geeky guys with passion for niche interests. However they also love to be viewed as people and a man that showers. 😊

[@caleb4772]

The virgin thing can be religious as well. Personally I've stayed a virgin by choice, waiting for marraige. Its not a dealbreaker for me since I don't judge people's past, but in general its nice if the person I marry holds the same values and waited for me in the same way I'm waiting for my wife. Just a preference thing, I want it to be an intimate and special experience I've only shared with her. Also avoids a lot of complications regarding risk of pregnancy if contraceptive breaks, child support, etc. That meme is pretty ick tho not gonna lie.

[@caleb4772]

Most of the women I've dated have had the same views, there's a big subculture of this among many religions. Obviously seems weird to the modern culture, but not gonna lie it is really nice to get to know someone for purely their personality by doing lots of activities that aren't sex. It tells you whether you'll get along with them long term even after you're old and physical attraction dwindles, which at least in my case I hope will mitigate risk of divorce and all the nasty consequences that come with it (financial, emotional toll on the children, etc). It's what my parents did and they have the healthiest relationship I've ever seen. I'd be lucky to be as happy and in-love as them when I'm their age.

[@celiashen5490]

This is the healthiest thing I've seen in a long time on the interwebs. May God bless your journey with lots of good friendships.

[@grenade8572]

I'm still a virgin by choice too. Not because I believe in a religion, but because I'm asexual (it means I have 0 interest for sex). I recieved hate (fortunately, only online) for not wanting sex. Did that happen to you too? I mean, were some men agressive towards you because you didn't want sex immediately?

[@caleb4772]

​@@grenade8572 I am a man, so no men have been aggressive though a few have teased. The teasing stopped when we hit adulthood because the kids who made fun in high school now have STDs, broken hearts, lots of drama, or pay child support. Meanwhile I'm out here living my best life. The response I usually get nowadays is, "good for you, I wish I had waited." I've had a few women confused or upset because they're so used to equating sexual pursuit with love, they thought my lack of advancements meant I found them unattractive. I assured them they're plenty beautiful, but I want to know someone for their inner beauty before I have sex, and by that time might as well get married first. So far girls have respected and even admired that response. The ones who don't are welcome to go elsewhere, there's plenty of guys to sleep with if that's all you want.

[@grenade8572]

@@caleb4772 Thank you for your detailed answer!

[@gretchenmyers1279]

men likely prefer virgins so the women won't know what a poor excuse for a lover the man is. That is the only thing I can come up with. I feel that if you want a virgin, you better be one.

[@jurgnobs1308]

​@@moho_braccatus8201 the control thing is also why they said "debt free". in an american context, that essentially means "did not go to college". they want women who ideally fully depend on them. not saying that everyone who didn't go to college is dependant, but combined with the virgin thing and all, they definitely just want a woman who's essentially their private toy at home.

[@imao15]

12:03 the fact that this only proves why they don’t want to give this guy a chance is hilarious

[@amxterxsu138]

there's one thing i'll never understand about some men's obsession with virginity. you do realize that once you do it for the first time, she isn't a virgin anymore, right? what's your next play here?

[@ryderrettenmaier2885]

The thing is, i Think by virgin they mean has not slept with another man before.

[@theatricalhorseschlong]

that uncle shouldn’t be left alone with his niece ever again.

[@jackalvalcoun1846]

Heres something i dont understand about the whole "girls shouldnt have high body counts-" if someone has a high body count, it probably means they're GOOD AT SEX. MAKING IT ENJOYABLE. Like, I dont care if someone has a body count, it just means they're gonna know how to do things right!

[@kimmykeys4748]

These niceguys dont want women who dated other guys because they dont want to be want to be exposed for there careless and selfish behavior

[@SugarTits716]

The body count thing is bullshit. It doesn't matter who a person fucked prior to being with their current partner as long as they're not raising their count while dating you (unless you're both consenting adults who are into the "open relationship" thing...which is also nobody's friggin business unless they're involved as well). Basically, it's nobody's business & anytime I've ever been asked for my body count, I refuse to answer because my number isn't gonna change anything in a good way. Plus I don't ask or care about how many people my partner was with before me because I only care about knowing if their count goes up while we're together. All that happens when asking about numbers is insecurity, anger, disappointment & arguments. Why do people torture themselves by asking anyway??!

[@SugarTits716]

Also, yes, practice makes perfect when it comes to pleasuring your partner! Who wants an inexperienced person, especially one who refuses to listen & learn because they "watched a lot of porn so they know what turns a person on" & then gets mad when they can't get you off? Lol!! Nobody knows very much until they learn to listen to their partner & realize that learning is a way to mutually bond & understand how much more enjoyable sex is when both people are comfortable with themselves & each other!!

[@ThijmenPols]

wait so one of those "nice guys" thought their cat wasn't cheating on them? That's like saying the supermarket only opens up for you alone.

[@letsreadtextbook1687]

Dude probably don't let their cat roam outside nor meeting other cats

[@vibegoose439]

This made me feel a lot better about how I handled being rejected a girl I’ve liked for a while 💀

[@not_you_i_dont_even_know_you]

Rejection sucks, almost everyone has been there. Proud of you for not going full on incel about it 😊

[@rossdoesnothinginteresting]

2:34 As a woman can confirm we do also like video games and comics sometimes

[@celiashen5490]

I'm an example. I like comic books and I'm female. Namor the Submariner is a favorite character and I squeed when he finally showed up in the MCEU.

[@stapoldy_propaganda_account]

yeah i'm a girl, and i play video games all the time. i play a lot of mario games, (mostly u deluxe, mario maker 2 and mario kart 8 deluxe, which i play with my dad and brother, ) alongside minecraft, miitopia, splatoon, and more! it's stupid that some people think video games are "boys only," because they're a universal experience! there are so many different things to offer in gaming that it's idiotic to consider them anything other than gender-neutral!

[@mrtrollnator123]

​@@stapoldy_propaganda_accountfr video games imo can be played by both genders

[@abigailgriffin-wc3fm]

Yeah I have music video game and just everything taste that we're heavily influenced by my family because I have a very close connection with my family

[@werebilbyj4449]

I think it's really funny that "nice guys" think that dinner and drinks is all you need to get laid. They are so disconnected from reality.

[@mikhagamingworld]

8:03 and this how r/niceguy turns into r/imverybadass

[@RAN20097]

With the uncle it almost feels like he wants to be with his niece that what vibes I got from him.

[@cftyftyufyfuyfty]

I got the vibe he was reliving his own trauma and was trying to make sure other kids got a chance with a pretty girl when he couldn't. He was trying to impart decent advice on her in a sad and immature way, not smash her.

[@RAN20097]

@@cftyftyufyfuyfty That might be true nerds need love too but he should of went at it diffently.

[@ezioblazesit9017]

@@cftyftyufyfuyfty Agreed.

[@MK-io8ov]

The guy going off about how people are stupid and we're turning "nice guys" into assholes sounds terrifying. Like "you won't like what I'm about to become" and "I'm done playing the nice guy" sounds like a terrorists written manifesto. He sounds like he's getting ready to go out and shoot a bunch of people.

[@bruhimanZero_0]

I love me some Emkay

[@I_I_I_I_I713]

Nice first human

[@user-dv2mn3cu4x]

​@@I_I_I_I_I713nice first reply

[@wilbusgilbus7232]

@@user-dv2mn3cu4xnice first reply to the first reply

[@stapoldy_propaganda_account]

​@@wilbusgilbus7232nice first reply to the first reply of the first reply

[@AdamDoesEv3rything]

----Mmmmmmkay

[@glitchhoffe1293]

One of these nice guys tried to date me this year, I told him I was a lesbian becuase I felt like he had a crush and I wanted to put him down easy. The next day he confessed and I told him again and he said, "yeah nobody likes me." The next week he said to another girl in our school and she said she had a boyfriend, and this dude asked her to be his "babe girl" and when she told him no he then said the same thing he said to me, she showed me all the emails too, he says he's a nice guy/dude, but he's always mean to the teacher and says a lot of violent things. Luckily we're not in the same classes(hopefully) (btw I am a lesbian, and you have my permission to tell any “nice” guy out that you are too)

[@q12aw50]

If I was a woman in that position I would lie about being lesbian and take it so far to have a family with another woman just to not date that guy. 20 bucks is 20 bucks but keeping this guy away is worth even more💀

[@Jumpyman_thegamerYT]

I have to say the same thing to women. Usually they call me either 1) gay, 2) misogynistic or 3) an incel, whenever I reject them. I'm actually gay, but they don't seem to realise this. And no, before someone says something, I am not talking about ALL women ok? I never once said that.

[@Iheartmefr]

Lmao- I met a nice guy this year. He was attractive(had a cute face and was buff due to him working out) but I was more like his therapist than I was his love interests since I was there to give him advice on how to improve himself and escape the cycles with toxic lovers he had in the past(that he complained about). He would cry about being unattractive and I would comfort him saying he is not and then he would say "but my exes who were jealous said I was" and this would repeat and repeat and it would end with "If i'm attractive then why won't you date me". I would usually tell him that even if he is attractive it doesn't mean i'm interested in him and that he dives into relationships too fast because we met like a week ago. and then the cycle repeats again but then... He goes "you think you're too good for me?" I would usually say no but then the question "Then why won't you date me" comes up again. So instead I decided to list every little red flag I noticed about him during our short time of talking and said that I wouldn't date him or even bother with him unless he was able to improve or try to improve on all of those. Of course he stopped talking to me ^^

[@NeistovayaChupacabra]

I'm lesbian and you girls have my permission to said to those creeps, what i'm (misandric russian weightlifter) is your girlfriend :D

[@jostv.2726]

I love how so many people think that whatever creepy thing they believe is "god given". Don´t blame being sexist and terrible at having a healthy relationship on someone than yourself...

[@dragonkidd1644]

When he was talking about how women like chaos the first thing that came to my mind is jevil yelling CHAOS CHAOS

[@hohotash]

god, give me strength to NOT be like these guys. ugh.

[@kiroakakoVT]

robin's such a good emkay narrator :) i love listening to him whilst drawing aha thanks for the new vid

[@hamsalad1989]

honestly i love all the voices

[@bopsgaming3810]

I was gonna say this was a bot comment until I saw the VT in your username.

[@imstoopid363]

i use emkay like a podcast- background crap to draw to 👍

[@Navonex]

Used to have a friend like these guys. TLDR: he had some bad experiences with women so he just lumped them all together as if it would solve the issue. Spoiler! It did not. Guy was funny, but he sucked with his liquor , and refused to get help for internal issues. Moral: he refused to change, and thought the girlfriend would help with that. Thats not how relationships work.

[@melinacat5958]

Hearing him yell about how dumb all these takes are and that women are people and not creatures etc. is genuinely kinda healing lmao

[@kurotsuki7427]

I however am a creecher, a little goblin grimlin, a goofy cheese munching being that likes to screech when alone.

[@stalinbeballin9711]

The rude jock thing is definitely, well, a thing. It's called a stereotype for a reason, right? Buuuuuut there's plenty of nice "jocks". There's guys who are definitely a full foot taller than me and still usually nice as hell. At worst, anything they do that's rude could be played off because, well, they're teenagers who still haven't developed entirely. They're too loud? They're teenagers. You know?

[@Kaykdoa]

11:02 My Mister played D&D and ('merican) Football, he went to LAN parties and house parties...a nerdy jock type 🥰

[@galacticknight55544]

A truly nice guy doesn't need to say he's nice. He lets his actions say that for him.

[@usernamemctypey428]

"Being nice" is just defaulting to a formal polite attitude and following whatever others say in a social setting because you're too incompetent to do anything else. Realize that, then start improving your social skills instead of trying to prove to yourself that your "niceness" is a good thing. Even if you fail, at least you'll be honest to yourself and that can never be a bad thing.

[@ThePopo543]

6:54 looks like someone missed the part where it said "emotionally mature".

[@99baking]

10:55 at my highschool, the football guys were the ones playing DnD

[@Walu355]

ah yes virgin. celebrated on women but sneered on men. society🌐

[@plaidy.]

We NEED equal treatment of men and women in this failing society, ASAP!

[@QueenMonny]

​@@plaidy.Agreed. In all things. I could list for days all the things that really rile me up about inequality (which I dream would be equal) but "In all things" will just have to suffice.

[@Inedible_Garlicbread]

Here’s some advice from a girl to all of the “nice guys” out there, if you want to be loved, learn how to properly love back.😊. (And don’t get angry when you get rejected, there are plenty of fish in the sea)

[@kirara2516]

As a 34 year old woman, I do indeed love comics and video games. Give me a Marvel movie over a chick flick any day.

[@turbo8628]

I don't think it is the taboo that it used to be. Surprised i still read things like this online.

[@kirara2516]

@@turbo8628 growing up I was expected to play with barbies. Instead I asked for Hot Wheels and Ninja Turtles. Lol that was the 90's

[@plaidy.]

​@@kirara2516good for you! Same here, I love hot wheels and lego. My parents never judged me tho.