How to Deal with Age Pressure & Social Clock ⏰

[@lavendaire]

Hi loves! ✨ We just launched a new community program ft. masterminds and monthly live events for personal growth & wellness! Learn more & join here → lavendaire.com/DLC 🫶

[@NathalieLazo]

“When nobody else celebrates you, learn to celebrate yourself. When nobody else compliments you, then compliment yourself. It’s not up to other people to keep you encouraged. It’s up to you. Encouragement should come from the inside.” - Jay Shetty ✨

[@chinnyb4942]

It's crazy that women feel pressured to settle down by 30. I'm currently 27 and still trying to navigate my career and social life. Nothing wrong with marriage, but I believe women should be financially stable, date around, travel, have fun and find themselves before settling down.

[@bambaking6265]

By date around do you mean sleep with multiple men? Honest question

[@chinnyb4942]

@@bambaking6265 I mean going on dates with men.

[@bambaking6265]

@@chinnyb4942 well whats the end goal of going on a date. In other words you want to sleep with a bunch of men before settling down?

[@akshu7966]

@@bambaking6265 why you twisting her word like that? sure having bunch of relationships and dating is essential to know who you vibe with or not, it may or maynot involve sex.. the way you word it makes it seem like "sleeping around=whoring around" which is clearly not what she's referring to

[@bambaking6265]

@@akshu7966 lol okay sure. Dating around definitely does not mean sleep around

[@CarlyO1092]

In case it helps anyone, my mother had my sister at 40 and me at 45, after multiple miscarriages. It is definitely possible! For additional peace of mind, we were both born healthy. It does happen :)

[@lavendaire]

Yes! Thanks for sharing

[@jelemil]

Its not something the avg woman can bank on. There are biological realities that before 40 is far easier than 40+

[@CarlyO1092]

@@jelemil never said women should bank on it. Are you aware of the fact that many YOUNG women in their 20s are dealing with infertility today? Being young is never the only indication you will be able to carry a healthy pregnancy. I gave an anecdote, my own mother’s story of how I was brought into the world, which is a fact. Thanks for the input!

[@tizianarani6775]

Yes that helps someone :) thank u

[@CarlyO1092]

@@tizianarani6775 very happy to hear that and much love to you

[@avneet2.0]

At the end of the day, you have to block out all the external noise and focus within. Sometimes what we want from ourselves and our life is much simpler than what society expects. Loved the topic! :)

[@nataliesoutlet]

Needed this. My parents have been begging me to have kids since the age of 25. Wayyyy to much pressure

[@celesteflores1445]

I’m 20 and already feeling behind. Wishful thinking had me hoping I’d somehow have it together but as I do the math, I will hardly be finishing school by then and starting my career. it’s important to be patient with myself and not compare myself to others. Thank you for the reminder

[@lavendaire]

You still have plenty of time. Don’t stress about it 🤍

[@thinadlamini4671]

You still have your whole life ahead of you don't feel like you behind.

[@fernyd.t.6716]

Hi Celeste! I'm 20 too and sometimes I get the feeling of being behind everyone else; my career is paused and I just wish to continue studying but at the moment I can't. However, I take this year to get to know myself more and realizing school and career and jobs is not the only thing in life. I keep struggling with that but, it is a journey we must do and nobody will fight this for us. We must take it easy✨

[@upondlite]

it's too early for you to feel that way! stay optimistic! you have so much to stress about later. just focus and enjoy your early 20s.

[@ashleysandino9949]

If you guys are only 20 and feeling behind that i have way more catching up to do than i thought 😅 (I'm 27) still no baby, house, or engagement 🥺

[@notaryava6612]

Just to be recap 1. Get clear with yourself 2. There is no rush and there is no rule 3. Define your own version of success 4. Your envy or frustration is a clue to what you truly desire deep down 5. Celebrate yourself and how far you come

[@mariapaganmusic]

I'm 32 and in this boat of feeling the pressure 😬 I see my friends and influencers I follow on social media getting married or getting engaged left and right, having babies, buying their homes, traveling, etc and I'm just in the middle of finish my bachelor's degree after dropping out and struggling to figure out what I wanted to do with my life for a job. My 20s left while I was there confused, trying out different paths. I don't regret my 20s though because I did write several books and published 2 of them so far, and overall I was happy, but I didn't notice the time passing me by and now I'm 32 and sometimes feeling like I've fallen behind 😅 My pressure lies on having a family because I've always said I don't want kids, but as I've gotten older I'm not so sure I don't want to. I honestly still don't know, but worrying about it is also pointless because I don't even have a boyfriend 😂

[@allthestarss]

I could really relate to this. I am 25 and working on finishing my associates degree (with a goal of a bachelors) after dropping out of my original degree and school and taking time to try other things and travel (as well as taking time for my mental health). Im now finishing my associates with 2 more semesters to go, but I feel like I am so far behind. I feel like I lost 2-3 years because of the pandemic and I feel like people keep passing me so to speak. But this video definitely helped me because I realize that I have to cultivate the things that I want to cultivate and shouldnt focus on societal pressure.

[@Sasjuh1992]

I recently graduated at 30 and I’m also trying to figure out what I want to do for a living, glad to hear that other people my age are having the same struggles

[@ashleyyuzdepski2862]

Friend, you're doing great! A published author! I'm 30 and I've never been published, so you're already ahead of most of us :)

[@rebeccaashley8272]

I'm also 32 but I don't want to rush because of society pressure to get marry. Keep doing what you enjoy and try to figure out what you want in life. It is always woman that has been pressure by society as we grow older. I want to know what I want to do in life and if anyone wants to get marry or have baby it is out of their own feeling. My sister got married when she is 32 due to society pressure and she afraid of being left out and now just had baby, she struggling everyday in her life. It make me think what are we rushing to?

[@rm709]

Same boat over here, at 31 now and I just finished my BS at 30…a half year ago. The stressors of my family and friends have made me feel like “I’m behind”.. but I realized that we all have our own timeline. Comparing yourself to others generally breeds discontent. Having the open mind to see that your life choices are what led you to this moment, and that they are different from any other person on this planet, helped me see that I have my own path; it does not have to be dictated by societal norms, but by our own desires and goals! Good luck!

[@taploykao]

Watching Aileen reminding me that my journey is not a race; rather, I would like to enjoy life as much as I can. Thank you, Aileen!

[@youcannotspellawesomewithoutme]

as a 14 years old girl, i can confirm that even at my age there are pressure about marriage. i mean, i'm just 14 you know? but even though, people trying to teach me how to be a good "wife" i don't want to be a good wife, i want to be a good at my job! if you are feelin the same, don't worry. just don't let somebody to tell you what are you.

[@anurlailika]

Exactly what I need right now. Being a fresh graduate, the pressure of finding a good job immediately is too high. In reality it's not that easy. Thank you so much for this 💚

[@lavendaire]

Good luck with your search! 🤗 you’ll be fine 🤍

[@seemranhoro]

"And one day she discovered that she was fierce, and strong, and full of fire, and that not even she could hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears."

[@negar.bagheri]

Omg this hit so deep!! I'm also 31 turning 32 this year. The biggest pressure for me is having children. I don't even know if I want any but feel like a lot of men do, and my family definitely wants me too as well. I just wish I had more time to live my life and not worry about the "ticking clock"

[@cassandrelosser5826]

I think there is more men than women that wanna have kids bcs they don't have the same pressure. For them it should be more fun, as for women it is more like a task, I think. Don't think about the ticking clock, if it comes it is gonna be at the right time ✨

[@socman002]

I'm 39, unmarried, no kids etc. I feel great because I can work on my goals whenever I want, but ... I'm kinda sad I don't have kids. But I don't want them because I'll be sad I can't do whatever I want. In sum, life is sacrifice - own your decisions and make the most of them, and know that either way they'll bring heartbreak and ecstasy.

[@jsings9202]

Thank you for this video, I really needed it. I am 23 and have never had a relationship, so it can be really hard seeing people my age already getting married and having kids. I’m also not super independent yet and still live at home and basically still feel like a child. But I really liked what you said about looking at other people’s successes as reminders that success is possible for you too. It something I have to remind myself to do more. ❤️

[@camera0bsessedx]

felt this, i just turned 25 and never been in a relationship and still live at home too

[@Metta1919]

Same ... I'm 24 and in the same situation

[@alildiary7889]

Same

[@fluffipups]

I'm 22, cant drive, and havent worked bc I've been focusing on studies and my parents didnt want me to work...but I'm still stressed bc ppl from my high school already graduated and are in well paying jobs. I'm sick of myself so I totally get you. I feel like a defenseless child and it's making my depression worse honestly :(

[@alildiary7889]

@@fluffipups hey there, thats okay. you've achieved alot more than you think. sometimes we do alot of inner work than we realise. not all accomplishments are external. keep going at ur own pace:)

[@jamiecunningham2409]

Thank you for this. I am 34, I have 2 children and am a single mum which makes me so sad everyday facing the struggles of life alone with no one to learn on. My house is a constant mess and my children never appreciate what I do. I haven’t met my version of success yet but I’m working On it ☺️

[@aytenozdemir96]

I am 26 years old and trying to find what I want out of life. And I agree with you .

[@hannahra.4777]

Honestly sometimes I wish I remained single because yes its blessing to have all at a certain age but it totally drains and age you faster especially when having a narcissistic partner and dealing with all kinds of pressure.

[@cassandra_cassowary]

I'm 22 and just recently graduated college and I already feel old (which I know is ridiculous but I can't help it sometimes). Thank you for making this

[@hemalathabiddika5494]

I'm in same situation

[@smile6029]

Same here

[@tajat866]

You are not old. Your adult life just started, take tike to explore it 🥰

[@TheContentDoctor26]

You're not all all dears, my best best advice right now for you is, be intentional about getting to know yourself better, especially before you get into any relationship. Read self help books to help develop your mental and emotional strength and just be conscious about building yourself, developing yourself and understanding yourself.

[@kimmiharitha438]

Same here

[@alimarleau]

After getting a number of rude questions from family about when I was going to have children, I started saying “everytime someone asks me this, I’m putting it off by another year”. All those people magically stopped asking, it was glorious. The right answer from me: none of your business!

[@juribeiro8217]

I really needed this. I got married very young and my husband is only 6 years older than me, but he behaves like he is so much more. I'm 32 years old, I already know I don't want to have kids but I feel like I'm letting all the fun in life pass me by. I need to start traveling alone, which for me is one of my definitions of success. Thanks for the video Aileen!

[@Kuon5]

I definitly recommend travelling alone :) I met my husband when we were 16, we got married at 23. I‘m turning 31 in October and I just recently returned from South Korea. I lived in there for 1 year alone, while my husband stayed here 😊 He was ok with it because I never had the opportunity before due to work, but you should have seen the reaction of my family XD Ironically as this may sound, this 1 year apart brought me and my husband closer together since we stopped taking each other for granted^^

[@vaishnavib2863]

omg!!perfect timing...I am struggling with this pressure a lot. Such a timely video.

[@tanniehere8541]

This is what I exactly needed as I am 30 and feeling all the pressure to get married. I am also confused because I am very happy single and independent but also have the fear that I might regret later if I don’t get married.

[@tajat866]

You can still get married later, if you want to 🥰

[@lehoangngocnhi279]

I just finished college, but the friends around me already have jobs. That doesn't bother me much, because I know that right now I don't want to find a job but learn more skills, read more books. But recently, my family, friends and neighbors have been urging me to find a job just because "I'm of age to go to work". Thank you for your sharing.

[@sakinastraveldiary4562]

I think exactly like you when it comes to my body clock. I don't mind adopting one day if I desperately feel I want to be a mother. But for now I am satisfied taking it slow and at my own pace not conforming to stressful pressures.

[@beccaplans]

Aileen, this gave me tears of relief. I never saw it this way, of what success looks like for me and how I define it. I didn't know about egg freezing so that's something I can also research on my own. BC I just turned 30 and I feel that societal pressure and my own pressure of what I used to want 5 years ago. I'm a different person now and I might want different things for my life and that's okay!

[@brittniyoung7893]

Thank you for making this video. I am totally feeling that age pressure. I turned 32 this year, and finally bought my house. This was a big milestone for me, but lately I've been thinking about okay now I need to find a bf, get married and possibly start a family; however, I had to take a step back. I realized that those things were never things I necessarily wanted, but seeing my friends/family starting families I felt a little pressure. My parents have never pressured me about this, and really raised me to focus on my own success and happiness yet I still feel societal pressure. This video was really great, and came at the perfect time. I don't want to rush into anything, so I will pause, reflect and enjoy my new home. 😊

[@beccaplans]

I've been struggling with these pressures for years now. Thank you for this video. It's here at the right time 🙏❤️

[@Dara-Favour]

I really appreciate the points you mentioned in the video Aileen, as someone who has achieved so much at such a young age I can say that where I come from I don't suffer from the social pressure but from family, people close think I'm so lucky to have achieved dis & dat but in reality I suffered so much from mental disorders and soon I became passive about life, but I really love two points you made. 1. Listen to your body 2. Other people success should be what makes me believe it's achievable. So once again thank you for the video it is helping so many people here.🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾

[@mikayamada8276]

I actually had to save this video to listen to over again and again. We are the same age and I know EXACTLY what you mean about the pressures of society. This has felt like such a warm hug and exactly what I needed to hear

[@ernahasan8512]

I'm turning 25 in few months and this is what I currently need.

[@msnishaxo]

omg im turning 32 tomorrow and NEEDED this :( I'm going through a break up and having to move out.. feels like I'm so behind compared to everyone around me

[@chocolatechick729]

This is perfect. I am 32 also and I have grown with you Aileen. It is very annoying when older generations asks when we are going to do what they did, with their expectations. We are a different generation and we change and have different beliefs. I have decided that I don't want kids and that's ok, I care about the environment and I don't want to bring kids to a dying planet. I am grateful i am getting older, many people do not make it to an old age. Aging is a gift of life. 💞

[@lavendaire]

i'm so grateful for you here! and YES I love that you stand strong with your own beliefs & decisions.

[@freesiajasmine534]

I agree & relate to everything you said here! It's up to each person & it's not fair to put expectations on people because everyone is different

[@linzhao2235]

@@lavendaire I'm 22.8 years old and I don't have any of it. I'm feeling down about life. I feel like I'm running out of time in life. If I achieved those things by a later age its like who cares you've already lived your life time is running out. Everyone cares when you're a teen because then you have all the time in the world. That's my view.

[@lavenderminty]

I feel this so much. I'm 32 years old and I constantly feel behind on life, not because of my outlook but because of what I feel society is pressuring me on. Thank you so much for this video 💚 Hearing other people talking about this is making me feel like I'm not alone, that it's okay and that I got this 💕All those wonderful tips you always bring is also so incredibly helpful and calming, I really appreciate you 💚

[@issy0613]

This video is everything. I just wish my family understood this. Edit: This is why your channel is one of my favourite channels because you literally perfectly encapsulate and articulate all of my values and beliefs. There's not many people around me who think in this way (except my friends maybe) and I just feel like you've just been this life mentor ever since I was a teen just trying to figure out what life I want to lead and who I want to be ❤

[@Sasjuh1992]

This could not have come at a better time! I’m 30 and recently graduated from university. Ever since I’ve returned home from living in Ireland for five months I’ve not been feeling well mentally. I live with my parents, I don’t have a job (yet) that matches my level of education and the current house market makes it impossible for someone alone to buy or rent. I’m really feeling the pressure, especially since many of my friends are settling down, getting married, etc. + I sometimes feel like I’m a bother to my parents even though they assure me I’m not. Thank you for reminding me that it is okay to do things at your own pace! I think I’m going to create a vision board that reflects what I want for my future

[@ReneeWalkerRAW]

Thank you for this gentle reminder! Even when you get older, you still wrestle with the same pressures on yourself. As you mentioned, it's most important to remain kind to yourself. Have grace. 💜

[@Xena66001]

I love you soo much I recently started listening to your channel and you have changed the way that I think. I am letting go of the pressure as a 35yo woman who hasn’t had great luck with men and I am focusing on healing and maximising what I want out of life. I do your daily 21 day affirmations and they’ve helped me regain my assurance in me! I would love to ask you what some of your goals and desires are xx

[@BlondeQtie]

i am 31 and i don’t feel like having kids. too stressful, too expensive, doesn’t suit my lifestyle right now, i am not secure in my career and finances, i don’t have a man that would make a great father. maybe that changes, maybe it doesn’t. i always check in with myself and ask myself „how do i feel about this topic right now?“ and i write it down so that when i look back, i understand my past self and that this was the best decision for me then and that i thoroughly thought it through. this prevents regret later in life.

[@ScholarDeepika]

I m 28 and I just finished my M. Phil and trying to get into my PhD. I also felt social pressure about earning as much as others or about marriage at this age. But I know what my goals are and as long as I envision myself in my best version, society's pressure won't affect me. I manifest to become a Professor and it will require hard work, persistence and patience, so I'm ready to give all for what I truly deserve.🌱🌻

[@deeptisubedi5219]

Hi, glad that you are getting PhD at 28. It's something that one can wish for while you're already there. I am 27, doing my Chartered Accountancy and after this I am thinking of going abroad to do my Master's. And as per my calculations, by the time I finish my master's and have a decent job abroad, I will be 32. I don't have bf as of now and being unmarried in Indian society at 32 feels like really being behind others.

[@ScholarDeepika]

@@deeptisubedi5219 trust me! You are doing great.🌸 I believe, we should keep on examining our potential irrespective of our age and time because Socrates’ a philosopher said’ -An unexamined life is not worth living! I have a philosophy major so I gave this example. :) Best things happen to those who wait and I wish you will have your best life waiting for you in near future. I hope you will delve into your present growth and undoubtedly it will take you on a great path in your future. All the best. You will succeed.😊✨

[@risika]

I was listening to a podcast that said, “it’s important to live life by design rather than emotion. Basically, sticking to a routine is what allows us to be the healthiest version of ourselves (especially when you're fighting these demons ex. OCD for me). I’ve had to overhaul how I approach taking care of my brain (exercise, journaling, studying etc) by practising mediocre consistency. Now I try to put in consistent 50-60% effort into my journaling habit - to make sure I do it I began recording it and posting it on YT. After a really bad depression phase I started to believe I couldn’t change and I’d feel that horrible forever. I thought success was having a high power job right out of graduation + paying of my student loans. When I achieved this I felt so empty because I realised I just wanted my family to see me as succesful. So I stepped away and Im now priortising myself and any success that comes to me now will come from me taking care of myself.

[@italico2792]

Alieen thanks for this amazing video!! This is the right video for me. I always feel 'late' and feel like I should have done more in my life. I'm 28 and not accomplished my dream life. Looking back I overcame a few fears but still too focused on what I don't have and what I need to accomplish. I dream big like you!

[@tajat866]

No worries, dream life takes time. At your age, I had no idea what I wanted. 10 years later I have a very nice life 🥰

[@italico2792]

@@tajat866 thanks!

[@Gal-.-]

Thanks for raising such an important topic! I really agree with what you said here and hope that more people will be mindful to their decisions and choices in life. I believe that a lot of us are doing things out of social pressure instead of making the right decisions for ourselves. The outcome of not following our real desires is frustration in the good case and hurting others (like unwanted kids) in the worst case.

[@TheMediumChannel]

This is very useful thank you as many of my clients are women faced with the social conditioning around age and such and we help them..and men too to become present in their authentic selves through presence, breath work, reprogramming etc. to rise above the veil of the illusion of time and recognize how society's standards are set up to disempower women using tactics like guilting and shaming for example...we are better than this, don't buy into the comparisons, the agism etc. you are beautiful and powerful because you ARE SPIRIT...you HAVE a body subject to natural aging but this in not who YOU are...you are ageless...

[@AG-mu6tr]

I screen recorded the part about feeling envious. That was exactly what I needed right now. Thank you Aileen❤️

[@camera0bsessedx]

i just turned 25 and I feel so behind for my age, theres so many things I havent done or dont have compared to others my age and its so hard to not compare my journey to others. thank you for this video and giving us all this gentle reminder that we are all on our own path and doing things at our own time. ♥

[@frap4506]

It took me a loooong time to realize that my envy and bitterness's real cause was that, deep down, i didn't believe i could achieve the things other people had because i didn't have the privilege that they have. But now, I catch myself doing that and know better. The best way to deal with it is to do something everyday to get you closer to the life you want. some days you will still be bitter, but most days you feel gratified that you have done something to improve your situation rather than waste your time pitying yourself and bringing others down.

[@studywithmaggy8252]

Am currently 27 and I really desire to be a full time mum and entrepreneur but single by choice. I don't want to pressure myself on love and marriage.i want to be happy. I want to balance my career and motherhood. I don't want to miss the feeling of being a mother.

[@JingYou922]

I usually dislike sitting down talking videos but it's so different when it comes to you!! the way you speak is just so clear, even without a script! not talking loudly or adding annoying sound effects, your voice is just so calming. 😭💕

[@melimartini1286]

Aileen, you're so beautiful inside out. Thank you for existing 🥰

[@annaugcit]

I totally agree with the option of freezing eggs..I know that some women do that 💖 I can imagine my happy life living with my husband and a dog, having a second job as a influencer and cultivating my hobbies such as writing a book or improving my skills in realising a makeup look ♥️

[@susmitasaha442]

Thank you so much for picking up this topic... We needed to hear this from someone.

[@clau_sing_]

I just know I'm gonna have nothing figured out by the time I turn 30 and that's ok by me, enough pressure coming from myself already

[@oh_kayceevarela]

Thank you Aileen! After watching this video it made me realize that I am not the only one experiencing age pressure. I've been hard to myself and blamed myself that I didn't achieve anything at this age because of certain decisions. I forgot to celebrate my small success and blinded of what other people achieved. I already started journaling because of you and subscribe to your weekly inspiration and will be listening to your podcasts ♥

[@hoayeuly]

Nice video… 1. I’m 35, no house, having a job (but no career), not yet marriage and I’m extremely pressure with marriage, pregnancy & kids. I know what I want… I want to have kids but I realised having kids is not only 1 person goal/ready. It takes 2 ppl to create a baby & share responsible so I’m kinda stuck of waiting for my partner to be ready (aside from that he is also younger than me which makes it even harder to get him ready for having a child). I’m sometimes feel pressure from my own wants so I don’t know how to deal with it honestly. It’s hard & different for everyone so… feel even more stuck to find my options. 2. Envy: how do you deal with envy that you know you will never able to have? Like… I always envy those whose have wealthy parents? (Cause my parents are not) or I always envy those who has their family back? These are things that you can’t just work hard to have. These are things I guess call luck… to be landed in a supportive family.

[@jessicaluc9338]

This is what I need right now... I have a good cry today because everything got to much and am in my mid 30s and feeling the pressure to get married and start a family

[@lydiazhang4557]

I am 25....and I have already found age pressure everywhere in my life, and most of it comes from my parents. I guess I will try to keep doing what I want and try to isolate others' "suggestions". Anyway, this is my life.

[@rosesina]

Always thought I wanted kids until my current partner told me he didn't and asked me what I want. That was the first time I thought about my life without children and I love this idea! and the more I think about it the more I want a childless life! Love this video of yours :)

[@alexandriayoung8759]

I will also be 32 this October and I am still working on my career while balancing my home life. There will always be stereotypes, societal pressures, and assumptions on women. You have to stand up for what you want and never give up. You can do anything and never let anyone's limited beliefs stop you from your passion. 💗🙌

[@JessicaLou15]

I am 28 and don't want kids. I never have and genuinely don't think I ever will. Nothing about it appeals to me but I am happy for people who have them and want them. I think it's so important that children are wanted. The gift/curse of life is a big thing and the decision to create & keep a new one should a informed decision. Not one based on if you will be lonely when you get old, to keep a partner or you feel like you should etc... Hope one day we can all have the privilege of choosing what's right for us X

[@amushinde4086]

I need this, my mom is pressuring me for marriage 😅 and I don't understand anything, this video is like the universe's message 💕💕 thank u so much

[@sieunpark3436]

In modern society, everything has to be fast. The speed of the screen used to be slow just when I was teen, but now, as 10 years later, it is too fast. Also, there is no hiding anymore. But, the fact is that rush ruins every quality of result. There are no rules when is due to actually. It's just that people made. So, we don't have to care so much. We can just relax:)

[@feliitchi]

i didn't even watch the video yet but i know it's exactly what i needed right now! i mostly feel bad for still living with my parents while turning 30 next year but when i look at all my friends and classmates so many of them are doing the same thing. then i remember this was the norm until the 1950s! (or atleast in america)

[@11katerinasofie33]

Im so tired of society´s expectations. I am a recovering people pleaser and really focus on myself now.

[@chantellegus2069]

All this pressure. Because of my health my life hasn’t turned out that of the average 27 year old. It’s hard to not feel like I’ve failed or I need to be further along. It’s hard to be kind to myself that where I am right now is enough, is okay, I’m doing my best. 🧡

[@ghostrider369]

No matter what point you are in your life. You are exactly where you are suppose to be right now. Everyone is different and things will fall into place when it's time for you. Don't sweat it folks.

[@deepalibafna3108]

Thank you . Was so much needed. Needed to remind myself, society is not above me . My life , my rules 💜 Love you

[@rynhardtaucamp2610]

I hope you achieve what you aim to. I hope that you do everything at just the right time for you 💜

[@grace-mj7rj]

I’m 29 and now it’s already August. More than half year is gone and yet i’m still single since born lol..now with my age i got a lot of marriage questions. I do have desire to get married but it seem no one interested in me. Which what I thought. But my mom convinced me to feel confident with myself which I appreciate it. But for now i feel like to improve myself first before ‘hoping’ someone to accept me.

[@patricia_1303]

I’m 26 and people say to me “You should have kids”! Personally, I never wanted to have kids, it’s just not for me, I enjoy looking after my nieces from time to time but it’s not something I desire for myself, and one thing I will never understand is how can people tell someone what to do with their bodies? These people who tell me to have kids, are so unhappy within themselves and show a lot of jealousy towards me because I do things they can’t do, but they have a choice just like me and any other woman in this world. It really brings a lot of anger and frustration for me when people try to tell me how to live my life and what to do with my body! Every person in this world have a choice, so please don’t put your beliefs on other people 💕 Thank you Aileen for sharing this video 🥰

[@sleepy_snake98]

I'm 23, and I have a lot of pressure as a college grad. Getting a job, and so on. This definitely helped oil my gears. Granted, I found this via being a little drunk. Thanks for this video regardless. ^^

[@webcherub]

All of your videos can be a go to for a recoup/self care day

[@kalynli3744]

thank you for this video Aileen,I'm turning 30 this year, and I feel "age pressure" when people around me keep telling me that I should prepare for a baby asap, sometimes I just feel so annoied, because if I was a man, NO ONE would say that. I want to live free, and I have so many things to do instead of having a "baby" now, women also have abilities to creat infinite possibilities. We should not be forced to do anything.

[@Ruru-zp3ol]

I know it sounds crazy... but I just graduated with my Associates at 18 and am feeling behind in knowing my goals. With the decision to take a gap year for the volunteer program of AmeriCorps, I can use all the advice for solutions vs the pressure. Thank you! ♥️

[@flrchile84]

I love love love all the encouraging words in this video. Like a breath of fresh air 😌

[@yenhuynhxuan7353]

Everyone has their own social pressure, now i'm turn to 21 and somehow got lost on my dream jobs and the next future would be, however, that's fine, whatever these pressures will be, try your best and get those tips of her, thanks a lot, Lavandaireee🥰🥰

[@hellyeah9728]

Hi. I'm 24 turing 25 in a few months, never dated. Got a job like everyone after graduation now I'm confused if it was right for me, looking for a career change. Also the fact ,the pressure is getting higher from all sides.I don't know why plp think that I fancy or aim getting married or have kids before my 30 or even in my 30s( I surely want my own kids but I'm good to adoption n being single parent as well). I end up being unhappy n feel terrible for no reason. Dealing with the whole pressure + career change while ur friends r getting married or having kids just make me loose my emotional freedom. Somewhere in between all this I do realise that I'm lacking emotional freedom. Celebrate yourself is so much better than celebrating a unhappy marriage or unsatisfied mum. Cause no one ever imagined divorce in ur perfect marriage, being a single mother n clueless about life is even more terrifying than being clueless alone.

[@tuananhtran5071]

Thank u for your sharing. Your video helps me not only to note down your tips but also to practice IELTS listening because your English accent is so astonishing. I'm a student at college now, I'm a bit depressed and worried about my future such as job opportunities after graduating. After watching your video, your final tips: "celebrating yourself and how far I've come" reminds me of how hard I tried to enter the college and overcome the pressure, tired of being asked: " Which university are you going to?" by people around us and it was a big success to me. And it is the motivation for me to keep on the road that I'm going.

[@sieunpark3436]

In addition, there are various people and expectations, so we cannot fit in all the things around us. Even though it's not perfect, the best way to deal with society's expectations and pressures is focus on my own thing. Especially old people think that self-centered mind is what we should never have. But, that's not true. Self-centered mind is advantageous when there is something that can hurt our mind and mental health. Self-centered people are less hurt because, in their thoughts, what they do is most important:)

[@ratnaanita4614]

watching this video, make me re-value myself

[@sariyabanu6095]

This is exactly what I was looking for🥺, thank you Aileen

[@Cherrycreamsoda1]

I’m 22 but yesterday I had an anxiety attack because I felt like time was passing too fast and I couldn’t keep up. This video popped up the same day. What a coincidence 😧

[@Sittie.Aiza_Vlogs]

I got married at 25. 😊 I am currently happy with our relationship because my husband is very supportive. In fact we are supportive for each other. We have a beautiful princess now. Sometimes, It's not always about being pressured of the time age or whatever. It's about choosing the right person to share your life with. Because no matter what age or time you are in, if you're with the person who's not good for your, life, mental health or not good for your career then that would be the major problem.

[@taylorgrabowski1918]

I'm 34 and relieved to hear you've come to the same conclusions I did about kids!

[@joohipatel2347]

Needed this. I am turning 28 this coming month, and there is a sort of pressure for an arranged marriage. I don't want to do an arranged marriage. Right now, I am just starting my master's degree, and I want to focus on my career first. I do not want to rush everything with marriage. I am happy single, and I want to focus on myself right now. Be financially stable and independent.

[@mysecretworld324]

So timely 🥰🥰🥰 I needed this, I love you!

[@raiderfrankdatank]

Dont let them pressure you

[@mariannelariviere285]

I almost never comment. I just found your channel. I think we are the same age. I just listened the 5 first minutes and im crying. I relate so much on every words about the section 2d section. Thanks so much for that. ❤

[@lavendaire]

thank you so much for sharing this with me Marianne 😊 welcome aboard!

[@freya614cherry]

HI Aileen,I like watch your videos ,them let me feel happy and comfortable.Ten years after graduating from college,I seem to envy the material life of the rich ,my life values are off track in this materialistic society.It can't be said that I live as I don't like now,but it's definitely not what I should be like in my ideals.NOW I'm trying my best to make a change,which makes myself like my own.

[@diahpuspitasari7181]

this's the nicest topic that I'll learn how to survive my life without opinions people, my age is 20th but i 'd known how did the oldest people passed they life thanks, i like those are ur video✨

[@musikhamster01]

It's my life, so it has to be right for me. If that is never getting a child, then that's it. I try to more and more ignore what other people think is the "right thing to do for me". It's my life, I have to live it, so the decisions I make should be the ones I feel good with.

[@kurisuchiinu1206]

Glad my circle of friends is the same as me. Most of us are just being independent women, enjoying life as it is at the moment. Sure some have a family but they don't ask us anything of the sort. More on, that would be on the family's side in which I'd be avoiding through reunions. I've always been used not to give in to peer pressure that people dislike me whenever I say no to stuff. Like you have to be doing what everyone is doing to be 'in'. And I just realized that's what makes me different from others and I'm proud of it!

[@thevintagelover6936]

As an aromantic woman(24), i’ve been dealing with these a lot when i was 19-20(especially age pressure). I felt that i should look for a partner in my 20’s cause that’s what all women in their 20’s did. I’ve never been in a relationship, had my first kiss or had my first date before so i’m definitely a virgin late bloomer. I can deal with it now, and i’m happy that there’s people like me who doesn’t want relationships/marriage, but i still feel so lonely when you don’t feel romantic attraction towards anyone and people(especially my cousin) asks you when you’re getting married and have kids(and it doesn’t make it any better when i’m only attracted to fictional characters, which i find so childish and weird. But i guess that’s the person who i am). And it get especially stressful when no one understands you and tell you that you should just wait for the right person. I love these advices.

[@hellyeah9728]

Hi u ain't alone. I'm in the same boat.

[@aimeemclernon1492]

The difficulty for me, is that I'm 35 and I actually do desperately WANT all of the things... a baby, marriage, a home to call my own etc. Not because society tells me I should (mostly the opposite actually), but because I value those things greatly. I just currently am not in the right circumstances to attain them. And I may never be, due to making the wrong choices throughout my 20s. This is what causes me to be depressed and anxious, the thought of never getting to experience those things. So OK, there's not necessarily a rush, but if you make the wrong choices, you might end up not being able to create the life you end up wanting. We should always keep this in mind...

[@minalacharya3385]

Love these tips. Feeling this now and just hate the pressure. Been hard to set boundaries on this issue but working on it

[@nishmitamoolur66]

Omg I really needed this!! I'm going through the same. Thank you for this video. Forever grateful 💖

[@rochegold7060]

Success to me being financially stable and not only surviving but living and have amazing experiences and that requires money.

[@nathaliez5750]

This video was right on time. I turned 27 last month and I can't stop thinking about all the things I haven't accomplished yet. I feel like all the people around are on the right path and that they are somehow evolving. Meanwhile, I wish that I could find a new job and an apartment to buy. Also, family and people at work always pressuring me about my love life... Thank you for the reminder! Love from Paris

[@RoRoMajor-Win]

I agree with all of this. Thank you for sharing this view point because we do all feel it. My husband and have been married 6 years and we love our life right now. But the question of having kids, buying a home, and all that is not exactly what we’re feeling right now. I’m 39 this year and I’m definitely feeling some pressure now, but I’m not letting it bother me and just focusing on enjoying every step of the way.