How to Set REALISTIC Dating Expectations, ATTRACT the Right Partner & Have the RELATIONSHIP You Want

[@LisaBilyeu]

What were some of the biggest relationship mistakes you’ve made? How did you learn from them?

[@tomandjennacali1879]

Well one of them came from the advice of Matthew Hussey 😂. Seriously. This guy is the worst relationship “expert”. I cant respect this show anymore. Bye

[@ChristianaSenibo]

Letting go of my values because I didn't want to lose him. Big no no!

[@amandaslay6045]

not accepting when someone no longer wants the relationship

[@greaterishe7197]

Believing too soon.

[@ericgavidia291]

Biggest mistake? That having a vagina makes someone honest, kind, or compassionate. Gender makes no difference!

[@synaesthesia4183]

Biggest relationship mistake? Unknowingly allowing men to disrespect me by rewarding bad behavior. By not walking away after strike two. By giving my time, energy, and affection when they haven't earned it. By not having stronger boundaries. Ladies, walk away and don't text/call invest in a guy who makes you wonder if he really means what he says.

[@smileymanimal77]

🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@babeudoo]

💯 spot on!

[@kristip7654]

I just had to do this. Walk away because I had started to wonder if he means what he says and he was making me feel like I was asking for too much. It was hard, but I left anyway and now I really feel like it was the right thing. Funny how our brains put us in the position to be taken advantage of.

[@marydietterich5968]

But what if the sex is great??

[@synaesthesia4183]

@@marydietterich5968 Then you're like me, tempted to go back because you're addicted to that rush....don't blame you. Mine was incredible too haha. Ultimately though, I was turned off enough by the immaturity and lack of empathy/accountability and gaslighting. Who wants to fuck a guy who acts like a spoiled, entitled, brat?

[@katkanegyke177]

The biggest mistake I’ve made was to be a people pleaser. And also codependent. I didn’t even know I was a pleaser till I decided to be single and start working on myself. It started 3 years ago and I also used the pandemic and the quarantine to go even deeper and heal all my traumas and childhood wounds. Now I’m just enjoying the present, still have a lot to work on… and being in a relationship or not? It no longer makes a difference for me. I’m good either way ☺️

[@kimgordon3695]

Welcome home 💙

[@ChristianaSenibo]

Well done. That's good progress. Keep going 👏

[@ChristianaSenibo]

Sometimes we get hung up about asking for what we need because we think we're asking too much. If it matters to you then talk about it. If your partner made you feel a certain way then tell him about it. You're not asking too much, you're making sure your needs are met. And if they care they will listen and provide the emotional safety and comfort you need.

[@caitlin544]

Are you saying no one asks for too much?

[@ChristianaSenibo]

@@caitlin544 not at all. Some people ask for too much. The difference lies in whether you're asking for wants or needs. If your needs for love, support etc are not being met and you're asking then it’s not too much. If your partner feels it's too much, you both need to consider whether you're asking the wrong person.

[@caitlin544]

@@ChristianaSenibo Ah, OK. In the first sentence of your topic comment you wrote _want,_ when I guess you meant _need._ I don’t agree, though. Our needs are our own responsibility-not someone else’s. We need other people but don’t have any entitlements to their labour. So we negotiate getting our needs met with reciprocity, by offering as well as asking. It takes quite a few people and resources to meet our needs. One person can’t meet them all, even if they _were_ responsible for them. And some people have huge needs that only a professional can address. Sometimes people need to learn how to meet some of their own needs, too.

[@QuanTheAlchemist]

Here are my 10 extra tips to INCREASE your daily manifestations that I’ve learned over the years..👇🏾 1. Practice gratitude every morning. When you wake up, list everything that you are grateful for and feel that gratitude in your core. Feel free to write things down in a journal so it is easy for you to remember. 2. Replace your negative thoughts with positive ones. Every time you feel a negative thought coming on, make a positive spin on it right away. 3. Take ownership for things that happen in your life. It's easy to blame others however you will feel much better when you realize that most issues stem from us. 4. ALWAYS believe that good things are about to happen. By being open to new possibilities you are inviting abundance into your life. 5. Remember that like attracts like so you get back whatever you put out, whether it is good or bad. So do good AND received good. 6. Meditate for five minutes a day. During this time focus on how you want your life to be; but place your focus on how you feel AND feel that feeling as if you have already accomplished those goals. 7. Step outside of your comfort zone. Stop playing it safe and make that decision to finally go for your dreams. 8. Focus on activities that make you feel truly happy. When you are truly happy you have the best vibrational frequency to manifest your desires. 9. Avoid the naysayers and surround yourself with people who only lift you higher. Downers will be downers, don't let them drag you into their misery. 10. Don't be afraid to dream and know that you are always supported by the universe. Hope this helps! - Your Friendly Neighborhood Coach ❤

[@rhondarowe1424]

Thank you!

[@Heyu7her3]

Sounds like religion repackaged as something else

[@NathalieLazo]

Incredible person reading this, go after what it is that you want in life! Learn the skills, do whatever it takes! You are capable of anything! I believe in you! ✨ Love - Nat ❤️

[@nimaojama488]

Thank you your are so sweet God bless you xxx

[@oneworldonehome]

"Passionate love is like a flame that burns very hot, but that cannot burn for very long. It is based on fear and hope and fantasy. It is imbued with desire, and it reinforces personal insecurity and personal neediness. This is the love experience that so many people are pursuing in life at great expense, but it is not an experience that can lead to a really successful relationship in most cases. What you are looking for is an experience of recognition-a deep, quiet, powerful experience. It is not highly emotional. It is not fraught with fear and anxiety and uncertainty. It is coming from a deeper place within you. It is Knowledge recognizing another. This is very different from the experience of falling in love, which is really entering a kind of pathetic, unknowing state-filled with desire, fear and uncertainty." A quote from one of the *New Message* teaching entitled *Love and Relationships* by Marshall Vian Summers

[@kimgordon3695]

Love is not Limmerence

[@johnchapman5125]

Thank you, Ivan.

[@julieann1975]

Thank you

[@notestoheal222]

There’s also nothing wrong with being single.

[@lisabilyeu8103]

1000000% agree!!!!! Some of the most content people I know are single by choice! So thanks so much for emphasizing this!!!

[@PaleOpal21]

Thank you!

[@LouisaWatt]

Being single is great!

[@myacct8304]

It is perfectly fine to be single. No one said otherwise. That’s not what this video is about, though. This video is for single people who want to be in a relationship. Both types of people exist.

[@juliannamarie4335]

This video never said there was anything wrong with being single.

[@cyndigooch1162]

I'm in my 60s and I'm still single because I want to be, which is totally okay! I understand why others are looking for a partner though, especially young ones who want to have a family. ❤

[@ray-jean]

The most important relationship to have is the one you have with yourself, above anything else 😊

[@MichelePearl]

I’m so happy being alone and single. I notice that now I am dating I feel suffocated very quickly and find that I need a lot of space.

[@MsLotusBlooms]

You probably are happier with your own company, which is perfectly fine.

[@nickadams1519]

@@MichelePearlSending Love ❤️…Are you single?

[@basicneeds1019]

There's also a few of us that either elect to opt out or have a monogamous partnership but are somewhat independent of each other. There's something to be said about single status. No bitterness. No depression. Just independent. Thanks for the video.

[@healingonesmindset]

Amen!

[@lisabilyeu8103]

Love this point!!!!

[@PaleOpal21]

Yes!

[@kimgordon3695]

Get rid of expectation Know your NEEDS (standards) Drop the created Narrative... Leave your baggage at the door Start with genuine Admiration

[@maddyG7414]

I think that addressing and handing your insecurities alone is crucial before getting into a relationship. It doesn’t mean they won’t crop up again when you date again but you’ll have the tools to recognize them and not act on them. I had a very manipulative ex who would toe the line and emotionally cheat and then gaslight me. It’s effected my trust for years but I’ve worked so hard on dismantling the beliefs I gained from that experience.

[@nickadams1519]

Sending Love ❤️…Maddy…Are you single?

[@user-ee5om8wy7u]

It never happened to me where I like a little thing and then later get annoyed by that same thing in a person. If I like something, I like it years later. But it happened to my partners. They love me and my style of talking at first, but then later they hate the same things they loved or they get bored, and it always hurt me. Worst part is when I notice the change in their behavior and talk about it, they deny it all, making me think that I'm 😧 crazy.... To not get hurt in the future, I decided to not ask about behavior changes any more. Instead, if the behavior changes and I don't enjoy it, I back off to create distance and take my solitude to seriously think&decide whether I want to continue relationship or end it. Period.

[@heidi.a.thomson]

Not for a romantic example, I have been struggling to communicate and have a relationship with my father (for decades). I finally wrote him to express my feelings in a non-judgemental "you did" or emotional way. His response: If you feel that way, we can't have a relationship. So instead or acknowledging, or arguing, he dismissed me.

[@amandaroncevich9380]

So sorry and not sorry you got the response you did. Not sorry because you got a very specific answer. He gave you black and white proof that he is not capable or interested in the rich connection you want. I hope you are able to move on with disappointment and not blaming yourself and feeling not enough. Remember he was probably not parented in a way that built emotional awareness and depth and he probably leads a life that is emotionally shallow and disconnected in many other ways as well. I feel for you 💕

[@Heyu7her3]

Oh wow. I guess now you know who he is still, and no longer have to struggle since there is no relationship.

[@nickadams1519]

@@amandaroncevich9380Sending Love ❤️…Are you single?

[@MetaPhysStore0770]

Its important to ask permission FIRST, did he want you to dump your pain on him RIGHT THEN, YOU feel you can dumped ON HIM, i would ditch a self obsessed person that feels like dumping on me with no warning!!!!

[@mcad1359]

Why you're single..... Because I choose to be. There's nothing wrong with being on your own. Don't let society convince you that you have to have a partner to be happy. xo

[@Howtonaturally]

Ok, but this is a video on how to do dating...not for how to be single or how to enjoy your own company. If you want to die alone and not have someone to share life with that's your choice and your friends and family don't count.

[@MsLotusBlooms]

True. Why don't people ask married people why they're married?

[@nickadams1519]

Sending Love ❤️…@mcad…Are you single?

[@mcad1359]

@Howtonaturally What a positive reply! Sounds like you got it figured out. You take care and have a wonderful year. Ciao

[@csuMa90]

I wish dating is like a job interview would be beneficial asking references for no time wasting lol

[@rajeshmishra6852]

One more over 30 detected

[@singer_the_artistic_genes]

haha

[@zenlenzmedia]

Why cant people just have fun in dating. With no expectations. I feel like people don't spend enough time getting to know the person, or people we are around. And not just in our dating life but in all areas of life. If we get into a habit of "being excited about getting to know thel person sitting in front of us" we would learn so much about them and ourselves in the process. And we really need ro be true to ourselves. Meaning we don't always have to agree with people to be liked. That is infact starting a relationship being fake. It would be so much easier to have relationships if people would lose expectations and and stop being fake. Being able to leave our hearts open to learn and accept more experiences, allows us to have more great and exciting experiences in all our relationships .

[@rajeshmishra6852]

It's the sex which makes men to talk with women.

[@samboriboun2213]

Alot of women cant...

[@HankiMaus]

When you have set a date with someone and they are late (not a few minutes, but let‘s say > 15 min), I honestly think it‘s disrespectful, if they simply show up late and didn‘t warn you about the delay… it‘s not the late thing itself that‘s disrespectful, because we all know things happen and life gets in the way, but rather the letting you sit there and wait for them. Our time‘s just too valuable.🤷🏽

[@kimgordon3695]

Only 2 types of people in the world

[@yoon4063]

This exact thing happened today and I told the guy not to come cuz I am not waiting for someone who doesn’t respect my time. He said I am overreacting. I am like “ excuse me? You don’t tell me how i am supposed to react. Bye”

[@HankiMaus]

@@yoon4063 How long did he make you wait??🙈

[@alexschwarz4749]

@@yoon4063 For me personally, getting informed that they are late is important. Being late can happen, sometimes things just happen on the way or when getting ready. What's NOT okay is letting one wait there without notice and with you not even knowing "Are they gonna show up, or was I ditched?". Obviously, also it shouldn't happen often - then it points to there being a bigger underlying problem on the late person's side. Could be bad organization, could be disrespect, anyhow it would need to be fixed first.

[@devickjulia393]

Wow I wonder what really happened in my nap for me to wake up on this wonderful knowledge...it turned out to be far better than the meditation I was listening.

[@mamasitatita]

The BEST video to fully encompass modern day relationships

[@trinamcinnis7150]

Truly enjoyed the discussion. Well done Lisa! 👍🏾

[@blisswkc3344]

Thank y'all so much dearest 🌹 Y'all such an inspiration 🥰 Appreciate y'all from the bottom of my heart 💖 Be Blissful Eternally 🙏👼🌈

[@jc4171]

Wow! Matthew is so insightful and helping so many women. Very rare to see kind, self aware and emotionally mature men ❤️

[@anuradhaprasadmaruwada7143]

The reason most people are single is- Lack of acceptance ! Simplicity has just vanished out of people's lives. More and more taste of material gratification is making people expect rather than give in a relationship. Lack of respect for your partner is also the reason !

[@ЮлианаСкоробогатова-в3и]

Such a GREAT episode!!! Love it! Thank you SO MUCH! It was really, really useful for me!💖🙏🙏

[@kes1582]

Always have your heart closed....keep it for yourself. Put your armour on....

[@bellealcalallaguno8669]

I am talking with this guy for like 2 weeks now. I met him on a dating app. We never talk about what we want with each other yet. But I remember he said on that app that he was looking for someone mature to talk to. We are at this stage of admiration. He's very curious about what I am into, very kind, and considerate. My concern is that I am 8 hr ahead of time with him. Been compromising some part of me already just to talk with him. And yeah I wanna be brave now and just be honest with him. Will that be okay? Will it scare him of how weird I am, like liking him for such a short time? Maybe he's just being friendly and I am misinterpreting things. 🥺

[@vaishalivaidya7978]

Superb compilation of someone of the very best

[@eunicemwanza2200]

Very realistic and mind opener . Thanks 🙏

[@AddlesH]

The gentleman at the end doesn’t understand abusive relationships. I did love my ex who I kept going back to. When he treated me badly and lied to me it did hurt. But I grew up learning that people who love me treat me badly. So it’s pretty understandable I kept going back for that. I also think his delivery is a bit off… he’s like shouting 😬 everyone else I really liked

[@LalaNaidu]

Love someone/everyone beyond the persona. We are Life itself, living itself, through us as us, and everyone else too. Lose yourself (your ego identity) and allow love to flow effortlessly...that's your true nature. Children of the Light awaken. You have been asleep.

[@TheoryofMastery]

I really needed this.

[@oceaniasmith2205]

Great video!!!

[@karash1974]

Great episode!!!!

[@anar8154]

Who s the girl of red press? Loved her

[@LJC3276]

Gaslight is a movie from around 1944 -this is where the term gaslighting comes from.

[@alabaster2163]

What I heard: If the other party is extremely nervous... F-ing RUN!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@keshneegovender54]

Always on point Matt

[@ligiasommers]

Wonderful compilation 🙏🏻💖🌹

[@eunicemwanza2200]

If it’s hysterical then it’s historical 😮

[@mariadelamercedcharro1047]

Thank you Mathew wonderful helpfull

[@FlowerDance333]

I love your show so much…

[@WanjiruMuya]

Am more happier single😊😀

[@vuyisekaluphuzi8249]

This is very true. All of it.

[@bolotabr12]

I rather be single than be involved with a sociopath

[@eunicemwanza2200]

This is reality 😊

[@tomandjennacali1879]

PLEASE TAKE EVERY SINGLE THING THIS GUY SAYS WITH A GIANT GRAIN OF SALT. These gurus are running out of ideas and they literally survive because YOU ARE THE PRODUCT. I cant believe these big KZbin channels that I used to love put such a bad taste in my mouth. Most of this is utter BS and fluff. I listened to most of these relationship and success youtubers for the last ten years- a lot has come out about Matthew- he’s not the guy he portrays- everyone is flawed and I’m done with this harmful advice that’s packaged into “free” KZbin advice. Your time and your mental space are not free. You can do this all with your own wisdom and advice from people who have died. Literally. Go read a book from someone who doesn’t profit from your views. It changed my life

[@user77-k6c]

What do you think is wrong with his advice in this video in specifically?

[@maddyG7414]

I see your point but at the same time I disagree. Yes Matthew Hussey is a business man. He has to make a living and he makes it by marketing. But at the same time, no one is forcing you to buy his program or attend his seminars. My friend actually attended his retreat and to this day she said it was one of the best things she did for herself. It totally shifted her perspective on her value. You don’t NEED to buy anything. But him selling things doesn’t take away from his message which is actually think is common sense. I feel as though his content had improved significantly recently- it used to be a lot more click baity and based more around playing games. But these days he’s speaking to an audience with specific struggles and his advice makes perfect sense. Ive found his free KZbin videos helped me tremendously in my dating world.

[@caitlin544]

Grocery shops profit off our hunger, plumbers profit off our need for running water and toilets, rubbish collectors profit off our need for our rubbish to be collected-are you saying that valuable things should be free?

[@Derlet30]

Agree! :)

[@jaipanesar6027]

@@caitlin544 well said

[@edgreen8140]

Men are fixers but men that are psychotherapists can listen. Change the lens you view things from time to time. You may find it hard but you may see another way to do things. There is always more than 1 way to do things. Think of strict bosses who want it done this way and only this way.

[@ninjaspam2000]

You need to interview Laura Doyle.

[@sarahmavignierr]

Number #4 WOW!

[@kimgordon3695]

29:00 solution

[@kimgordon3695]

Testimony & the retaking POWER 💙

[@dpharrison7]

If the action is hysterical it historical

[@itsme6038]

Why is he reading my mind...ahhahaaaa. Ok Matthew....ok...I see u

[@travelchannel304]

Bravo Stephan Speaks & The Orgasm 1st gal!!

[@LOADING...o.o.o]

We are so hurt because we put too much emotion in the dating. If you are a woman, don’t sleep with him right away.

[@edgreen8140]

You have no idea. Stop the story. It hasn't even happened it creates a story. 1)Start valuing the work that is done in real time admiration. 2)connection mutual admiration. No indicator of investment. 3) commitment 4) compatability-different values. 5)Do they falsely magnify your problems but deny their own errors. Everyone makes mistakes. Blamshifting is a red flag.

[@edgreen8140]

Abuse the person becomes a 2ary psychopath and enjoys telling you your reality is wrong. They attach your character! Very distructive. Don't react to this and they will realise you won't play the game. Observe don't absorb Ross Rosenberg m.ed. on you tube. Take a step back and observe the entire conversa tion. You will see the manipulation patterns.

[@user-iy8wh4eg9j]

does Matthew have a relationship????????

[@tomandjennacali1879]

Last I checked no and I’m pretty sure he cheated on his last one. These gurus are a joke and I am sick of it

[@SmileKT68]

@9 9 Yes, he is in a relationship now.

[@violetinispaltas7274]

Just a thought... Is in it weird and unnatural to clarify things that are clear? If a told a person I feel disrespected for x and y, and they asked me "Are you saying you feel disrespected because of x and y?", I would just think the person in front of me is dumb or manipulative, and it made me just want to finish the conversation and do smt more purposeful than repeating the same over the same.

[@Heyu7her3]

The mirroring technique allows people to corroborate what one person says they feel vs. what the other person heard the person say, focusing on that rather than their own interpretation or a rebuttal.

[@miiriinada7193]

I liked that guy until i saw the kind of girl he was dating.... now i think he should follow his own recommendations before sharing them with others.

[@chiaraaltieri9719]

What do you mean by this?

[@miiriinada7193]

In my opinion, a KZbinr in his 30s dating a 22 year old from planet Twitter is not the right source for advice on relationships. At least not for me. Mat Boggs sells exactly the same stuff but he has a wife and kids that add to his credibility . I guess one Mat is selling "how to get the guy" and the other "how to keep the guy" ! In the end, it's all business and single women are the target. At least we can get most of their advice for free !

[@travelchannel304]

Who is the Prioritize sex gal?? That's my love language!

[@oceaniasmith2205]

I meet men with alot of past hurt and pain. Or we go on the first date and then was to kiss me in the mouth. Or they in a rush to have sex. Im tired of meeting men to be honest...

[@S_gw2011]

I wonder why anyone listens to a “guru” that is not married and has not had a long term relationship. Pass!!!!

[@SmileKT68]

@Suheil Walker - Wrong! He's in a relationship now. You need to stay up-to-date. Besides, he's following his own advice... he is a high-quality man, his standards must be pretty up there, I can't blame him!

[@SmileKT68]

This is actually a repost of an old episode.

[@tomandjennacali1879]

Unsubscribed from you and Tom today. You guys do not care who you have on your shows. This is the second time you have had this man on your show. If this is to empower women YOU SHOULD REALLY THINK ABOUT WHO YOU HAVE ON YOUR SHOW. HELLO?

[@lisabilyeu8103]

I can only respect your decision and of course I only hope you find content that is right for you! But I stand by the guests I have on my show wholeheartedly and just totally respect it if/ when other people do not jive with you as the viewer. That’s your prerogative to unsubscribe! But as someone who prides themselves on loyalty, honesty and transparency I’ll also just say that I have heard you and yet still disagree with you and your assessment . Again there’s no right or wrong. You don’t like them and I do. I’ve seen the impact they have had on so many other propels lives. So while they aren’t for you they, in my opinion, are incredibly impactful and inspiring to someone else struggling. And THATS my goal!… My goal isn’t to please everyone (stopped doing that a long time ago). But again I always want to hear the truth whether we agree or not so thank you for being honest and unsubscribing to the channel if it’s isn’t for you! Mad respect and I truly hope you find content that helps you on whatever journey you are on.

[@farmerchicmandy.]

@@lisabilyeu8103 very well said

[@yumnabarendse7401]

Why are you against him?

[@allkinofjennifer1544]

@@lisabilyeu8103 well said

[@miiriinada7193]

@@yumnabarendse7401 his dating history seems to show that he does not do what he preaches. Also, he charges A LOT OF MONEY for very basic "private tutoring". I wouldn't go as far as unsubscribe from this channel but i did unsubscribe from Matthew Hussey's channel.

[@priesteresmarietje4772]

Why is a guy giving counseling to women? Improve the quality of men because most are sorely lacking, including Matthew who's putting all on us women. He's another problem. Date with friends. Let family be part of the approval process. Anyone who really respects you will want to be include by friends and family. Sorry, Matthew is what we call in Native American as "dog who chases his tail." Earth to Matthew! When are you gonna land?

[@lisabilyeu8103]

I can definitely address the first question! I personally want to get as much knowledge about something that’s important to me as possible! And so I personally don’t care in the slightest if that message comes from a man. I actually believe that’s part of the problem in today’s society. Who cares what they look like? What gender they are? If someone has advice that can help people then THAT is what is important to me. I hope you can hear the message without judging the messenger but if this episode isn’t for you then I totally respect that for sure!

[@farmerchicmandy.]

@@lisabilyeu8103 😊

[@chezy8148]

This guy doesn’t give good advice, I wouldn’t listen to him

[@cassylangley]

I don't like the lady making the 10 and 2 reference it's not nice to rate people in that way. People rating people in numbers irks me lol though i agree with her point.