If You Struggle With Anxiety, You Need To Hear This | The Mel Robbins Podcast

[@melrobbins]

My son Oakley always blows me away with how wise he is for his age. If you want to see more of Oakley, drop a like and let me know in the comments below!

[@mskaruhluheevon]

When I was in high school, my therapist told me something that has stuck with me forever and changed the perspective of my life when I was having a similar experience to Oakley. “You are all and everything. Without you there is nothing to experience. You are the Universe” ❤

[@amandalantz4627]

The relationship you have with your son is so wonderful! The way he is able to be open and talk about emotions is how every man should be able to talk. I hope I can cultivate a similar relationship with my son. He's only 3 now, but we already talk about our feelings all the time ❤️ I myself struggle with emotional issues and anxiety, and I feel like I'm helping him learn to manage his emotions while also learning to manage my own ❤️

[@helen6866]

That's absulutely wonderful, thank you for sharing! ♥🌹

[@bethmiller6827]

Reassure him that he can handle anything.

[@carolynshane295]

Mel, your son is incredibly intelligent and self aware for being 17!! Wow! Keep it up Oakley!!

[@anniehertz]

BEST PODCAST EVER! About Time! YES! ❤

[@AnthonyMorales71]

Mel. You don’t understand how much this conversation with your son spoke into my life and I’m 51. To know that your son went through something I went through when I was a kid made me feel like I wasn’t alone. When you mentioned the thoughts you both have, I was like, Wow. Thank you. This was on time and God sent. Thank you both. Your son has a testimony that can help so many. ❤️

[@latashaburnard7778]

Oakley, that was such a great analogy. "Therapy is like a notebook but you don't have to write and you get an answer back." 🥰

[@sabrinaeverton6256]

At 26 years old I finally feel like I'm not crazy, and that there is people out there that understand me. You both are a blessing, thank you for the insight and sharing your stories!

[@AWholeVibe96]

Same!! I’m 26 as well. And I feel like I’ve been fooled my whole life.

[@AlexiHolford]

Neither of my parents had a clue what was going on with me when I lived with them from about middle school on. I can’t imagine my mother being like Mel, invested and interested in all that is happening with her child. Things are great between me any my mom now, but when I was Oakley’s age I was hanging on by a thread and neither parent paid any attention to me. It’s great to have an example of how a positive relationship can be.

[@nicolerinaldo9546]

This, me too

[@shelleyfaust1064]

Recently learned that Egyptian and Navajo cultures believed that JOYFULNESS is life’s purpose. After hearing that the way Egyptians believed that if you were Joyful and then shared Joy with others is what allowed you into Heaven In the afterlife, I realized that it is Joy that is the purpose of our life’s! Just that simple! Wake up, cultivate Joy and share that joy with everyone! Exactly what you do Miss Mel Robbins, you out here on the internet teaching and sharing joy with the world! 🙏🙏🙏 Love you, love seeing your son share with all in this episode!

[@roseanneducut8525]

Thank you for sharing this quote with us: “I just try to live every day as if I’ve deliberately come back to this one day, to enjoy it, as if it was the full final day of my extraordinary ordinary life.”

[@allysongomez-jv2oj]

I just love this kid!! He is the absolute best!! My favorite podcasts are when he’s on the show!!

[@cindybuntain9361]

He is such an amazing young man. He needs to venture on to getting his own podcast. I’m sharing with my grandson and adult son who struggle with anxiety. The lord has big plans for this kid. Thank you for sharing.

[@mistypfitzer111]

Thank you Oakley, for being so willing to share ur vulnerability with us! It takes a lot of courage & selflessness on ur part, but it WILL help other teens, & families to open up avenues for communication 🥰😁👌💯

[@staceyleach2033]

I feel the exact same way about Oakley and his honesty, bravery and of course his laughter!! He spoke to me, and I’m 56. He truly has a gift of being so relatable!! Thank you for that!! This is my favorite episode so far!! ❤

[@lindseypoindexter702]

I have panic disorder and I am so happy to see this conversation on such a big platform. Oakley has so much awareness! You are doing a great job raising him.

[@midlifemom5829]

Finally, an episode involving teens! My 16 yo has been struggling for the past 3 years ( anxiety, depression, substance use, suicidal thoughts, residential, PHP, IOP). There desperately needs to be a dedicated channel for young people. We are fortunate to have good health insurance, but many do not and cannot afford to continue with therapy once insurance stops coverage.

[@amandastergianos9263]

Oakley thank you for being so brave and vulnerable to share this. My daughter ( 19) so often says we are all going to die so what’s the point ( of living ) I always find it so hard to say something meaningful that does not sound disconnected or trite I feel helpless and scared as her parent. She does have support but you really (both ) helped me understand her feelings I’ve shared this with her and it’s good to know these feelings are not irregular

[@claudiaalvarez9578]

Beautiful and amazing. Thank you. Moved My heart and My mind.

[@kimaldridge1019]

This is the most amazing episode. X

[@saliko59]

@melrobbins Thanks for the thumbs up re medication.. I suffered panic disorder for many many years! Your metaphor re needing a ladder is so so true. I did other therapies to help myself but I am convinced that without the medication I would not have regained my confidence (I was deep inside “the fear of the fear” and on many occasions would not leave the house because of it) to get back out into the world and regain my life! I can’t stand these ppl who have never once suffered a panic attack but speak strongly against medication,,,,

[@goobiesace]

Oakley, you are such an authentic and courageous soul. Thank you for being so generous in sharing your experience because you have, without doubt, given so many people insight, perspective, and the ladder they need.

[@michaeldrake3225]

When will I learn not to listen to these at the gym? Cue tearing up on the treadmill. What I wanted to say was a big thank you for the open conversation about suicidal thoughts and how common they are. Too often we battle alone in fear of systems that stigmatise and "punish" this and don't consider the whole situation. Big love to you both x

[@nataliepower7464]

Wow 💖 I'm just about to hit 55 years in March. I am still looking for my purpose...💡moment...I'm here simply to live my best extraordinary ordinary life. Thank you, Oakley, for sharing your life experiences with us. You are an AWESOME, incredible young man. Although we think with our minds, we are not our thoughts. Anything that can be observed is external and not of the self. We can choose not to let our thoughts into our universe...I pop unwelcome thoughts that don't serve me on a leaf and imagine them flowing away down a stream or river out to sea. I also try to remember that other people aren't their thoughts either. So perceived thoughts of judgement or unkindness can be seen as separate from the person in front of you, and I put those perceived thoughts on a leaf too and send them off downstream, too. Both allow more space for inner peace and just BEing. An act of self loving kindness. Thank you Mel & Oakley ...much love Namaste 🙏 💖

[@xannaz9226]

love what you say here

[@Momswinning1]

Mel this is your Marie Forleo B-Schooler girl Kimberly & I sent this to my grandson Jayden and awaiting his response… So Proud if YOU Oakley🎉👍🏽

[@sharonirungu2092]

This is my best episode yet!. Thank you for your vulnerability.

[@paulamadden1830]

This was one of thee most amazing Podcast! Gosh he is beyond his years on so many levels!!! All teenagers can learn from him...he shd do talk srssions to kids; even thou he is still learning and growing! My heart as a parent was overflowing 💗 Made me cry; I felt very emotional. Thank you🙏

[@RickLeBeau]

From minute 52 til the end: best five minutes of Mel Robbins ever.

[@maithao5687]

Mel, I am in love with the amount of deep wisdom that your 17 years of life son has. I've experienced similar thoughts about the meaning of life and if it'll all even matter in the end and I am extremely moved by his profound words. Not everyone has the resources, connections, money, and capacity to get help and treatment but I love how Oakley not only benefited from his care plan, but went on to share that with others without expecting anything in return other than to simply speak his truth. This can seriously save a soul. Thanks Oakley.

[@tomburman7343]

You have an amazing son. Thank him that he was able to share so articulately .

[@JeanGenie92]

Oakley conversations are my absolute favourite episodes. Such a deep thinker.

[@user-fb1ys2lj9c]

Agree 100%!!!!!! Fantastic congratulations to your son Mel.

[@vickibazter3446]

Great kid!!!! Thanks for sharing, Mel.

[@Kathy-ku1le]

This triggers my anxiety and how alone you feel and scared when you feel you’re the only one who feels really hopeless and don’t know why and so scary!!!

[@madalyngaldamez435]

Oakley, you are an extraordinary young man, light years ahead of yourself. Blessings to you and your family.

[@robinenochs1320]

About Time is one of my favorite films as well. It’s a film we watch every new years eve.

[@susanbloemhof4391]

Good morning Mel! Thank you for this! 🥰

[@barbaramead729]

This is my favorite of all you have done-books, tv show, et al. So useful for me. I will pass this around as well. Thanks you guys ✋

[@sarahhkcu]

Same!!!!!

[@veragaffney7901]

Thank you for sharing Oakley!

[@JennyGaston]

I'm thrilled that your kids are in therapy 👏🏾. Both of my kids are in therapy. They started during the pandemic as a way to process their big feelings during that transition and we never turned back. As a therapist, I'm the first to say I have a counselor ❤️

[@beachkat]

Oakly has grown into an awesome guy! 👏👏👏

[@julieterrell1973]

I just scheduled an appointment for me and my daughter. We hadn't been in a few years, but we both LOVE self-improvement and awareness! And your son is so awesome, transparent, and authentic

[@alexalcherise9082]

Love this episode! Thanks Oakley and Mel!

[@mistypfitzer111]

I LOVE the podcasts with Oakley 😁

[@GigglyRedhead]

Oakley, it’s great that you were able to handle the anxiety on your own. Sometimes we do need to handle things on our own. But not always. Please remember there are people to whom you may reach out and they will be happy to help you. People need one another, especially during difficult times. You seem like someone who would be happy to reach out and help a loved one. Always remember that you deserve the same love and care. 😊

[@gsthompson4592]

This was a great subject & presented so well... thanks... Glenda

[@justyrenson]

Thanks!

[@JJ0901]

Mel, thanks for sharing this. I'm only 40 min into this episode but I wanted to recommend a book to Oakley, Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse. It is one of the classics that I just came across and finished reading. It is about life, how we could view and embrace life. It touches on time; in Hesse's opinion, time doesn't "exist", life is not a continuum of events, but is omnipresent. I am going through rather a difficult period of my life and your podcast has helped me so much. I cannot thank you enough. Sending love from Korea.

[@EyesonEnforcement911]

I remember a few years back, my anxiety was at an all-time high, so I tried to get some help by watching your videos. I can comfortably say that your videos made my situation 2x worse. You said the best thing to do with anxiety is to try & forget it, but when being subscribed to you, it's impossible because you remind me of my anxiety every.single.day.

[@Eileen_mjc]

Make your universe your own. Enjoy it!

[@GeorgiaDiaconescu]

Would be AMAZING to have timestamps on these videos. Loved it

[@melrobbins]

We added time codes in the description! 💛

[@molehog]

I will share this with my son. Our issue is. He's open with me. We don't have a typical relationship. We grew up together .. recent years I've tried to get him into counseling or therapy but he isn't keen. At all. He's almost 17, so I will definitely share so it's not so clinical and scary to have someone else to trust and have. Thanks !

[@elizabethtrieu1446]

I love that someone else has 2 gigantic whiteboards around their kitchen! That is my home. I’m really glad mental health is being talked about more these days. This is a very important and serious topic. So thank you, Oakley (sp?) for sharing your personal story with us, the listeners. I have struggled with anxiety my entire existence and in the beyond 30 some years of dealing with this, I have come to find out these few changes have made the biggest impact on me: 1) yoga 2) meditation and mindful, conscious breathing around the clock (not just during meditation), being present in the here and now 3) exercises besides yoga to remove the extra jitters than can occur 4) changing your diet to a whole food plant based diet, devoid of plant based junk food, no pop, etc…. 5) sleep Now I still have anxiety, but my levels are much more controlled than in the past where I at one point had to be checked to make sure I didn’t have asthma. And I would have to sleep off the attack for a couple of hours just to get my head on straight. I was also taking 5HTP at one point too. The above list has helped me more than anything else. I hope you give this a go and I hope you find much success in managing your anxiety. Your thoughts are normal. Just don’t act on them.

[@chloem9164]

Thank you. So much. You have no idea how much this has helped me especially hearing it from someone close to my age. Thank Oakley too. It’s not easy opening up about mental health but he has now made me feel so much less alone. I feel like so much weight has been lifted off of me. Hands down the best podcast I’ve ever listened to❤️

[@cathymicallef1783]

I have listened to dozens and dozens of your podcasts/videos Mel and I appreciate you for all you do. But damn Oakley...Thank YOU young man for sharing!!! You may be young in years walking upon the earth (this time 😉) you are wise and insightful beyond those years!! Thank you for sharing and please continue. Well done by your entire family ❤️

[@gabriieleger]

Thank you, Mel. You're the best. Love you.

[@cindypierce7419]

Oakley, you are an amazing fella who will impact many in a serious way! I am going to speak to a large group of high school boys tomorrow and will refer to you, this episode and your belief in therapy. You could inspire many to start sorting and feeling emotions they have avoided in counseling, WHICH will make life in the 20s and 30s easier with a solid toolkit. Thanks so much for being emotionally brave.

[@michellenapoli2065]

Thanks again Mel for another great discussion! Oakley, you are awesome and appreciated for sharing your experience and thoughts! Thank you Oakley, for sharing your therapy nuggets! Mel, hearing you say that having suicide thoughts is normal, somehow makes me feel less misunderstood. I agree with other comments that you are our therapist! You seem to always be talking about a topic when I so need to hear your message! Thanks Mel and Oakley! You both rock!!❤❤

[@cindygambell8115]

That is one special young man！Kudos！

[@WiredPrettyDifferent23]

Thank you for this. Thank you Oakley for being brave and sharing this part of your story with us. You are incredible and amazing and I love and appreciate how vulnerable and raw and open you are. Keep talking, keep crying, keep laughing, keep shining! I always love seeing you/hearing you on the podcast!!! Love, Michelle

[@ThatPaintingLass]

I could probably listen to this conversation 100 times over, and each time I would learn more ways to deal with intrusive thoughts and how to look at the bigger picture and completely besides that a reminder to only put things into my universe that I want to be a part of my future story I don’t think I’ve ever thought of my future like that. Oakley you are profoundly gifted in telling your story and sharing your insights in a meaningful way. I will be one of those future people who ask to hear from you again because if this is the way you are talking and thinking as a 17-year-old, sir you are meant for great things and I can’t wait to see what those things are.

[@pollyannaneuenfeldt6664]

Bravo !!! Genius son ! ❤❤❤

[@pollyannaneuenfeldt6664]

Mel,Oakley , thank you for sharing the much needed inspirational guidance and tools needed in our homes , society and world. Sending you both prayers that you will continue on your journey of healing the wounded with your miraculous tools of experience and examples❤️

[@chickenhartlepool]

I'm crying at that quote about coming back xxxx we love oak

[@laurastokoe3065]

You have helped me so much these last few months but still a long way to go. Thank you so much 💜

[@margo5919]

I had the same experience at the same time in my life. Early Spring was the worst. Still struggle but knowing it comes in waves and it gets better helps immensely:

[@tanyamonuma7448]

One of my absolute favourite episodes. What an amazing young man. Love. Love. Love. Extremely insightful. THANK YOU. Already sharing it. So nice to have a young person express what is relatable to other young people AND adults 🙏🏽❤️

[@catalmeg]

WOW Mel, found you podcast two weeks ago, have heard 3 episodes and then I get to this one and tears are coming like crazy. Admiration to you both, for the openness you talk with each other and immensely grateful for bringing us into it. OAK go and find your purpose, you are without a doubt going to make a HUGE impact in the world you have at your reach.

[@psychplanet4905]

Extremely true👍 Our own life is a soap opera we have created. Being aware of that and moving on with necessary actions helps us to gain power.

[@ligiasommers]

What a wonderful,’clear mind young man ! Very handsome and sweet too 🙏🏻🌹✨🙏🏻

[@TheSunxy]

The thing you are describing at the end about a role in the universe Pixar movie "The Soul" really captures. Hopefully, this gets to you and you watch it, it is life-changing!

[@celicegonzalez8175]

Thanks Oakley for helping me. Am getting into a good space from where l was last year, in a dark spot

[@geraldstaten1268]

Thank you! Sharing this one to many...

[@lilyb.7437]

I really love this episode and I share it with my son. You guys are amazing and empowering people and giving great advice to others that are struggling with depression, anxiety and other mental issues. Thanks Mel and Oakley! ❤🌎🌍🌏

[@ursulamullikin4723]

I grew up in Germany in the worst times and I don't remember anyone going to therapy not until I came to the US in my early twenties, I have friends that went to therapy doesn't anyone work anything out anymore, I have gone through a lot in my life I also lost a son yes I admit I went to grief counseling and grief does not go away so I started with panic attacks, I have control over them they only last a short while and they're not fatal, I did enjoy listening to Mel's son

[@officialnikkiswisher]

He's such a doll for recording this. Kudos to him. He will go far in life!

[@denic.2452]

I 1000% resonate w this. Thank you so much for sharing and letting me know that someone understands🙏🏻

[@karenguidry6110]

This is the single most meaningful podcast/message I have ever heard! Thank you!

[@geraldstaten1268]

This is priceless...so appreciated and your son...love this guy! I have 8 grandkids, 4 boy-4 girls.

[@xannaz9226]

I love this guy's mind. When he gets his own podcast please don't air it on Mondays or Thursdays because there is only so much Robbins' wisdom I can feast on in one day. Enjoyed this dialogue a great deal. Thanks for sharing!

[@taraduddy7687]

I feel like Mel Robbins is my therapist.

[@lindaasulin7200]

Love u guys Thank you for this!❤

[@EmmyS-bo3wi]

Wow - thank you Mel for sharing and to Oakley thank you for being open and sharing with the world something that no everyone is open to talk about but that we should all talk about! Im sharing this with my loves ones💗

[@Tahoeluv]

Amazing. Thank you so much. ❤

[@hayleypollard2974]

Absolutely loved this podcast. So awesome to hear this through a 17 year olds perspective. Very insightful

[@leannehendrickson376]

Life Changing Episode...💫 Thank You✨ Oakly n Mel

[@simpleenglishgrammarforyou8025]

It was very well handled by the kid when Mel says she did the SPECIAL HUG "LAST NIGHT". Very funny!

[@trish2256]

Lovely to hear your son. I've been to a group therapist twice and had my say then told to keep quiet. Nothing was resolved it was a waste of time. I went for myself a different person I spoke got no response. I may as well have spoken to a stuffed animal. So they are a no no for me. Bad experiences. I'm fine now on pension.

[@badmomsfitness6446]

I love therapy and don’t understand why more people don’t go. I have battled my whole life with anxiety and in 2013 I was put on medication. In 2020 I made the choice to do the work to get off meds and do the work. I am not totally against being on meds I would just say that use them as a last resort. Do the work. The works is exercise, eat right, avoid alcohol and caffeine and see a therapist regularly. I always feel the best when I do these things and feel the worst when I don’t. I like how Mel says that meds are a ladder and in my opinion should only be used temporarily. When I got off the meds I started to feel all these emotions I never felt before and it was strange. Meds hide feelings. This episode is good and I think Mel’s son is going to thrive because he is dealing with the crap that most people live with and try to avoid all of their life’s.

[@cindybuntain9361]

The funniest reaction Mel had about the special hug was hilarious 😂. Especially saying oh last night. I love you both. Just great people!

[@joysnow7182]

I get it. I’ve had anxiety all of my life. I believe it has a hereditary component because my dad also had it. It is normal to have fleeting thoughts of the worst that could happen. It’s almost like our brain will sometimes play a little game of “what’s the worst thing I can imagine?” just to go there and explore that dark thought. It doesn’t mean that we actually want that thing that we imagine. Sometimes the random or scary thoughts that pop into our head aren’t even our own. They could be from a movie or something we saw or heard about somewhere along the line. For example, when turning off the lights in the kitchen at night before going to bed, I look through the big dark window in my kitchen and sometimes picture someone standing there with a knife raised like in some horror movie I didn’t even watch but saw the trailer on tv. I could entertain the thought or get freaked out about my wild imagination, which is extremely vivid, or I could just dismiss the thought and even laugh it off. I do the latter. And at the ripe old age of 58, I’ve learned that most of those worst case scenario thoughts can just be dismissed and I don’t even need to give them a second to ponder. My thoughts can make me anxious if I entertain the worst or I can choose to change directions and dismiss the worst and even purposely imagine the best. I used to always think? “What’s the worst that could happen?” Now I’m trying to think, “what’s the best that could happen.” Or even tell myself daily, “maybe something wonderful will happen.”

[@joysnow7182]

If I may add that I can relate to Oakley in that I am also a highly philosophical person. I remember asking my mom where God came from at the age of 5 and I remember always searching for the meaning of life. At the age of 17, I found my sense of meaning and purpose in God. I became a Christian and read the Bible. Honestly, a lot of the Old Testament didn’t make sense to me but the teachings and person of Jesus really resonated with me and still do. My faith in God made it all make sense to me.

[@melissalacewell863]

Joy this is also me at 56 lolol all the weird thoughts that could happen but luckily never do. I would love to start that mindset like u of what if everything goes right and waiting for something good to happen i love that thank u so much!!! And isnt Mel just the best!!

[@joysnow7182]

@@melissalacewell863 Mel is so inspiring!

[@amandapilcher2450]

This was amazing! Going to have my teens watch this.

[@lancelinville5422]

It's another awesome podcast.. we are in California and would love to connect with a therapist like Keith for our 18-year-olds! Thank you

[@pollyannaneuenfeldt6664]

Bravo !!! ❤❤❤

[@leannehendrickson376]

I WISH...every parent n child could see this episode...💕

[@heatherryll9303]

I appreciate you very much Oakley, thank you. You have got more going for you, you could be my therapist any day! This is coming from a 63 yr old?

[@talkingben8778]

I am experiencing this with my 13 daughter. She is on Paxil. It doesn’t seem to work and everything is super scary. A lot of this sounds like her.

[@robinenochs1320]

Incredibly interesting. Thanks for sharing this deeply personal and profound experience which will undoubtedly help so many. One thing that kept coming back to my mind was my upbringing and the message of Ecclesiastes in the Bible, which is that everything IS meaningless without God.

[@ajlazana9244]

Wow!! I want my child to talk to me at 17!! You guys are wow awesome!!💜💜💜💜

[@cielleweston2348]

Thank you 🙏 ❤

[@bfjrd]

My younger me can sing with a band or sometimes solo but because of some mistakes or failed performance I developed overthinking and anxiety. Then gets worst now that I'm not physically active. My experiences before was just being nervous and now is nervous + dizziness. In the past when I lose weight by exercising, the dizziness and everything is manageable, now goes back again coz I'm gaining weight again, ugh laziness.

[@shannacrownover7043]

How do I stop? That is my question. Over thinking, worrying, dealing with anxiety.... I cannot shut off my brain. Seems to always go to worst case scenarios, always planning for the worst, replaying conversations over and over thinking of how I could have handled things differently, sabotaging relationships before they start (friends and family included) to avoid getting hurt. It is more than exhausting. And when people ask how I am doing, I always answer the same "I'm fine".

[@bethmiller6827]

Reach out and help someone else.