Parenting Expert Has Nerve To Tell You How To Raise Your Own Goddamn Kids

[@grentperez]

he survived those muffins

[@njm3s048]

"Danny is not my true name"

[@jalengamer6413]

Shouldn't have given him the finger

[@truetape666]

I was literally watching that one right before this one.

[@Stonecargo21]

Nothing was done to those muffins He just has to live with THINKING something was done to those muffins

[@Stonecargo21]

@Karate Guy it's lead

[@haidbz]

"Just keep playing the questions, don't let her answer." Disappointingly, a way too common tactic irl.

[@ilikepigeons6101]

Wow

[@technicallydifficulties7094]

(Kent Hovind noises)

[@kobiiscoolerthanyou7877]

@@technicallydifficulties7094 piers Morgan*

[@CK-jm7sq]

@@kobiiscoolerthanyou7877 kaitlin bennett*

[@mightypurplelicious3209]

Friends that just wanna talk about themselves:

[@L3X1N]

The acting is so good that I got angry.

[@garfoofian8507]

At who

[@paulian1888]

@@garfoofian8507 Joe

[@treyhar33]

@@paulian1888 wHo'S jOe?

[@paulian1888]

@@treyhar33 Joe Biden

[@treyhar33]

@@paulian1888 Damn u responded quickly

[@Nooo893]

"How much do your kids hate you? A little, or a lot?" "That's a great question!" XD

[@ekatasatya2995]

as if he was forced to listen ..

[@MasterGrader]

Gaithersburg maryland is my area so that was a jumpscare

[@alhussainalrawi1]

How.many layers of sarcasm are we on?

[@crykng]

3

[@alhussainalrawi1]

Crykng Mason ha ur like a baby .. watch dis: *SUCCCCC*

[@NickTheNRG]

It's basically a moebius strip of sarcasm

[@SamirCCat]

As many layers as an onion has...

[@blockyorbits2376]

All of them

[@PajamaJazama]

This isn't even satire, this is mild compared to how 90% of parents respond to any criticism lol

[@xilencered7788]

Yep. Like suggesting that Grand Theft Auto V isn't a proper game for a 10 year old.

[@Humanophage]

@@xilencered7788 Seems very proper, it's a simplistic action game with shiny graphics and aimed at consoles. At 13, they should be switching to something like Divinity: Original Sin, by 16 they will probably graduate to fairly tasteful and intelligent games like Victoria 2.

[@cheilith1031]

@@Humanophage it has strip clubs in it

[@scorpionthegreatest5238]

@@Humanophage Victoria 2, I see you're a man of culture.

[@catlady4858]

@@cheilith1031 Oooohhh, scary.

[@Ursmoov]

“Omg she actually answered it” I’m weak

[@Jamun1920]

Had me dead! XD

[@jesseperez3086]

Best part

[@shinobione2575]

Rebekah thinks she better than us.

[@fibyq]

When the teacher thinks you weren’t paying Attention

[@yash124]

That 4 second silence after that gave me anxiety

[@stephaniecarrow4898]

"Ok, Rebecca, what other bullsh*t do you have the nerve to share with us this morning?" Something I wish every TV news host would ask every politician.

[@lilettex0421]

“The strange devices Chinese people use instead of forks” lol

[@DiamanteDea]

Joy chip stocks

[@lolicomics]

​@@DiamanteDea stickchops

[@hannahgray5903]

😂😂

[@zipperman6045]

Poverty twigs

[@suspiciousfigure3096]

Shanking twigs

[@davidusa47]

“Wow, I bet a lot of moms watching out there are thinking ‘fuck you.” The lightheartedness with which that line was delivered was pure gold.

[@MLIrons]

Yeah. My favorite rewind point.

[@wetspinachtv]

Lol “I get that a lot” 😂

[@danielmiyahara9089]

"Wow, I bet a lot of moms watching out there are thinking 'fuck you.'" For fuck sakes you forgot a '

[@DeluxBass]

IKR. This is now my all-time favorite video

[@anynonymous1585]

@@wetspinachtv me too :(

[@jackhazardous4008]

How dare you tell me to not just give my kid a tablet and leave them for the next 15-19 years

[@aturchomicz821]

Cool way to raise a generation on cursed media.....

[@phoenix5054]

Jack Hazardous I genuinely wished you were my dad, except there were no decent tablets when I was a kid.

[@analogapotheosis4275]

This is too accurate

[@tripleduck]

this is way too accurate

[@elisabeth9951]

Oh well, that's what my parents did for 3 years :D. I'm not sure of if it worked xD.

[@HansDelbruck53]

"While most parents would mind their own business, you decided to write a book." That's a good one.

[@felipenachmanowicz9393]

This was pretty amazing. You both criticized the expert and parents who cant take advice or criticism

[@jodinha4225]

Felipe Nachmanowicz IKR I love it

[@jessicavictoriacarrillo7254]

It's so perfect

[@nihalnihal9356]

Yes.

[@horseluver4ever623]

@NoNoNoNii Calm down, please. We don't get serious here on satire news.

[@xxhalfemptyxx7713]

@NoNoNoNii i think this karen's about 50% complete, just need to get it into a pyramid scheme and buy it some essential oils and get it into a shitty mom group and make it learn hollistic treatment and make it an antivax before it can release it's demonic screams.

[@UnsuspectingCommenterPassingBy]

The hosts are usually so nice and professional, their passive aggressiveness actually hurts lmao

[@potatomanagement_5770]

I saw nothing wrong with the hosts. fuck this women, she can't tell be how to parent my kids!!!

[@molly.dog8brooke792]

Potato management ಠ_ಠ But some people seriously need advice. You don’t have to take it, but maybe hear them out? I’ll r/whoosh myself now. Whoooooooooooooooosh!

[@potatomanagement_5770]

@@molly.dog8brooke792 yeah I know, i don't actually think that people like that lady are terrible.

[@christopherbradley7149]

Potato management ಠ_ಠ They are pretty dogshit. They generally have a good experience with their own kids and automatically think they’ve cracked some magic code and if only everyone did what they did. And I say that as a dad to the perfect daughter. I’m not stupid enough to assume it’s because I did anything special or that if people copied my parenting style they’d have the same results.

[@CryAlpha123]

Passive aggressive? I think saying fuck you is pretty aggressive

[@ResurrectionRefuge]

Lovin the passive aggressiveness from Tracy.

[@internetcomment4440]

Angela it's the satire.

[@JordanBeagle]

Angela 1:33

[@johinder8648]

I wouldn't quite say passive. Literally one of the first sentences is "who the hell do you think you are" but still it's really great. Today now is my favourite series of the onion and this is probably one of the best episodes

[@babbisp1]

FINALLY an example of passive aggressiveness I can actually understand. I finally know what it means.

[@dictatordolphin2791]

“passive”

[@StainsStainsStains]

1:33 her "jerkoff" motion while saying it silently was so perfect. Ive seen people do this and they dont like nearly as good lol

[@flat-earther]

hi cruising, have you become a flat earther yet?

[@StainsStainsStains]

@@flat-earther yah yesterday

[@flat-earther]

@@StainsStainsStains okay. BTW cruising, what do you think about all gubments drawing a line around you(Antarctic Treaty) and saying you are not allowed to leave? If you don't know what I mean, read my about tab.

[@cerovk6000]

She should do it to me

[@cerovk6000]

Why does she make the w✊ gesture?

[@40KBoss]

I genuinely cannot tell which of the two arguments is being satirized but I love this all the same.

[@NPC-hj4me]

40K Boss, both

[@cadenhenderson4322]

My exact thoughts when watching this

[@kidsfree6615]

​@@cadenhenderson4322 They are satirizing the "expert" who is telling parents all over the world how to raise their children. All children are different and some things work differently on some children than others.

[@kidsfree6615]

They are satirizing the "expert" who is telling parents all over the world how to raise their children. All children are different and some things work differently on some children than others.

[@icecreamdf5259]

Kids Free They’re also satirizing the people who take that kind of advice as some kind of personal attack.

[@richardjohnson3599]

"I bet a lot of people in the audience are saying fuck you!" ''You know I get that a lot!"

[@thebondofunity]

Underrated

[@YeOldeKamikaze]

One of the best lines.

[@gblargg]

This woman is a fraud. She's actually an expert in customer service and can handle any attack like it never even happened.

[@vio3366]

That was hilarious 🤣🤣🤣

[@spongebobby7675]

The Oscars are rigged. These people deserve awards.

[@octaviusroosevelt7355]

Rapist Spongebob Fun fact: I think it has actually been proven that the Oscars are rigged.

[@pleasedontlookforme8036]

Didn't everybody know that already? In fact, who the actual fuck still cares about the academy in 2020?!?

[@MyChannel773]

how exactly would the onion be getting an oscar ??? this is a web series

[@goldenaura7122]

@@MyChannel773 this was a joke

[@luminatron]

@@octaviusroosevelt7355 bribes ahoy

[@degiguess]

The perfect contradiction of "I can't always be expecting to know how to raise my kid" and "how dare you tell me how to raise my kid"

[@alvallac2171]

*expected

[@udasai]

Parenting pro-tip: nobody knows how to raise a kid, nobody ever has, and especially people who profit from pretending to know. Just please don't be sociopathic with your kids, like your own parents, and every other parent.

[@idontwannamakeagoogleaccou1033]

​@@udasaithat moment when nobody asked:

[@kaphizmey6229]

@@idontwannamakeagoogleaccou1033and yet his response adds a lot more to the conversation than _yours_ does

[@SioxerNikita]

​@@udasaiA lot of people could benefit from expert advice on raising kids. Plenty of people know how to raise kids, what you are saying is pointless and stupid. And profiting from it? There are grifters, sure... But if you spend a lot of your life researching child rearing, you expect to give that research away for free or something? Of course the person in questions wants to profit from it...

[@eathams]

*Reminder to turn your volume back down*

[@jong9379]

Eathams thanks

[@GodisgudAQW]

thx saved me

[@chiraqtookapack7189]

Eathams thank you! I was planning on jacking off after this video.

[@slippy2490]

I’ll be thanking you in 50 years

[@ad9red]

thanks 👌

[@joshuaisgreatgamail]

I feed my kids the other kids that didn't make it.

[@woodside4life]

Feeding kids to other kids is a lot like being a mom

[@DrDomich]

😂

[@DrDomich]

@@woodside4life 😂

[@nerp1120]

Weaklings, just teach them to survive only on eating their own fingers and toes

[@veronica-]

Oh shit

[@MAXBLAYLOCK]

They should do one with a financial expert advising poor people how to create a retirement fund.

[@adempc]

+1

[@powerpc127]

Every time you're forced to eat a hot dog from the gas station for dinner, rip off a chunk and place it in a tub of salt so you'll have food when your legs no longer function from years of physical labor.

[@NJGuy1973]

@@powerpc127 I think you have a future as an Onion writer.

[@vudi2103]

@@powerpc127 you got me fucking wheezing

[@Alon3InTh3Abyss]

Yes!!

[@hanshandkante5055]

No matter how often i watch that gesture at 1:33 it kills me every time. The actress is a comedic genius.

[@fernandaabreu5625]

The fact people find that monstrosity amusing is very telling about how twisted and degenerate society is nowadays.

[@hanshandkante5055]

@@fernandaabreu5625 You think THAT is degenerate and twisted? I think the fact that all our electronic devices are a product of child slavery is degenerated and twisted. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJStaaCbZ5eBjNU&ab_channel=SkyNews or the fact the we produce so much plastic that most of us have already micro plastic in our digestive system and that a garbage patch the size of europe has formed on the pacific and that we found plastic waste everywhere on the planet even in antarctica. kzbin.info/www/bejne/fajPppShepWjbtE&ab_channel=BluGreenEnvironment or the fact the we ruined the climate of our planet. Get your priorities straight, you ignorant. The fact that people have a different sense of humor then you isn't a proof for degeneracy - the fact that you can't handle it is!

[@jetpackjay3410]

@@fernandaabreu5625 hell yeah 🔥

[@gregcarlson8438]

@@fernandaabreu5625 that's interesting that you find that to be morally wrong.

[@handfulofmushrooms1135]

@@fernandaabreu5625 XD

[@niaranoctyrna3754]

“Professional mechanic has the nerve to tell you how to fix your own goddamn car.” This is hilarious

[@SomeOne-vf1rs]

Arid There is no one way to parent kids, but at the end of the day, if you’re hostile towards people who simply suggest or offer tactics to make it easier, then you’re probably insecure and are more worried about looking bad to other people than you are your child’s development. If somebody offers unsolicited advice, and is clearly trying to make you parent in a way that you don’t feel would work, or isn’t possible, then you’d have a reasonable source of irritation, which is not what’s outlined in this skit.

[@rajiasamuel]

@Arid this makes fun of both sides!!!

[@bsarioz]

For real though, so many shitty parents could listen to some advice or at least try to fix the issues somehow instead of flat out ignoring.

[@722blitz]

@Arid Lol, have you really never met someone who can't take criticism? It's a very common trait, and honestly it can happen to anyone in a given situation.

[@maelstrom2313]

I love how this video draws two distinct kinds of responses; the ones that side with the host and the ones that side with the expert. The skit makes fun of both sides but people latch on to the one they identify with. That's a hallmark of top quality satire.

[@that1sefguy]

1:49 Im dying "I get that a lot"😂

[@wackomanx]

That fuck you rolled off the tongue flawlessly.

[@pinkharmonica1312]

Lmfao i didn't even notice

[@literallygaston2489]

Octo Pi That was the best part imo

[@herbivorethecarnivore8447]

"Just keep playing the questions, don't let her answer" I know it's satire but that genuinely pissed me off so much

[@pugsabi]

Yeah, because it's so accurate. Why even have guest questions if you don't give them time to answer. I'm looking at you CNN.

[@OpusTheLeftie]

@@pugsabi Mm. Nope, try again. CNN does give them plenty of time.

[@Formula1st]

@@OpusTheLeftie I feel like there is news network tribalism over in the US. Don’t know why, The Onion I by far the most quality news source

[@theoriginaltommysteward]

@Lucas Egeland You only think in binary terms, huh?

[@mostpassiveuser8904]

Just like Sean Hannity.

[@kerchow1837]

I can’t even tell if they’re criticizing experts or parents that refuse to listen to criticism

[@pvshka]

Yes

[@PRubin-rh4sr]

Everyone is fair game. They even make fun of biased hosts.

[@suhaneegupta8349]

parents, experts, hosts, everyone sucks. everyone gets criticised. we dont discrminate out herem

[@RayOrly-fs3gr]

Both

[@TheCompleteMental]

The latter. Pretty obviously. Except that last bit I guess but that was a curveball.

[@joysecret9083]

Those strange devices Chinese use instead of forks .....I thought i was safe to take a sip of coffee in the first couple seconds

[@1simo93521]

She forgot to mention how her kids eat only fresh cooked organic vegan food.

[@jackjones4248]

ohmygod you actually cook your food? MY children only eat raw vegan and they all have IQs north of 140 and can speak Hindi

[@pureCA_OS]

jackthayer lmfao I'm crying! omg. lmao

[@pakk82]

i noticed that she forgot, too.

[@LordSandwichII]

It's such a pity I can't like that several times!

[@LordSandwichII]

king78802 "No, not bottled water! That contains endocrine disruptors!" It has to be defluoridated, Brita filtered tap water!!!

[@TheOnlyGFergie]

Imagine someone who doesn’t speak English watching this. Normally, you can at least tell if the tone of a conversation is positive or negative from non-verbal cues but for this you’d be completely misguided lol

[@k.w.1459]

I have thought this for years about The Onion. Even for those who speak English as a second language, but another culture, they wouldn’t guess this is American satire. It’s the one thing I am hesitant about with their content.

[@nyaswed1520]

Exactly. It all looks so professionally done-a non-native speaker would really have to concentrate to pick up the REAL meaning from the subtleties of the spoken word. I had a class of older German students watch this and they had real problems getting the real message conveyed. Don't show the title. This is just BRILLIANT work from Onion.

[@k.w.1459]

Nya Swed that is so interesting that you took this as a type of real life experiment with students. The thing with The Onion is that they play it completely straight and the production values and every presentation is high since they mimic what “real news” looks like. This type of content doesn’t help advance others perception of America or its people. I mean it’s funny when you get that everything there is satire, but I hate to think there are people being actually duped by it.

[@darklibertario5001]

My native language is Portuguese and I understand just fine. See, irony is not so hard to pick up.

[@roberttausig9170]

As a non-native speaker (I am Austrian), you underestimate how much we understand severely. Somebody who just starts learning English will of course be confused (But he would be confused no matter what). But a considerable percentage of Europe (Non-UK) is well versed in English and will understand political debates in the US senate as well as the Onion. It has more to do with general intelligence and humour, I am sure there are plenty natives who don't understand the Onion because they lack one or both. Also: American humour is "in your face" compared to the rest of the world. Humour in Europe is subtle anyway, so The Onion is not hard to understand.

[@LiezAllLiez]

"Oh my god, she actually answered...!" Im crying here!

[@columbus8myhw]

"Of course I can do X to my kids! My parents did X to me and I turned out OK!" Note: they did not turn out OK

[@lophy6668]

note: their kids will not turn out ok

[@luckyleo7050]

Note: Their grandkids will not turn out ok

[@bingbong3011]

Note: their great grandkids will not turn out okay

[@miko5742]

Note: their great great grandkids will not turn out OK

[@gaberottet8448]

Note: Their great great great grandkids will not turn out OK

[@stepancamfrla]

i can't wait to hear that bit about that scary chinese devices, but this is golden as hell

[@dolltron6965]

They are very very advanced, I went to Texas the other day and I handed the technology to your average male there and you know what he did? He forced peppers and bits of meat and BBQ marinade on it and threw it on a fire! He had absolutely no concept, that can only be explained by alien technology.

[@anitabonghit2758]

spoiler: its chopsticks

[@demondwilson706]

Anita Bonghit , what's the English translation of that?

[@Salien1999]

@@demondwilson706 "Ouch"

[@crow9149]

@@anitabonghit2758 NOOOOOOOOOOOO, REALLY?

[@ErickOberholtzer]

It seems the muffins didn't quite work.

[@TomatoBreadOrgasm]

If the pig debacle is any indication, they can make new Jims in the lab.

[@vobiesie]

I'll just leave the likes at 666

[@Bonez0r]

@@TomatoBreadOrgasm which one is the pig video? I keep reading about it but i've never seen it.

[@MastaSmack]

@@Bonez0rhey did a series called "Porkin Across America"

[@kadinfehr785]

If the legend Jim Haggarty can recover from full pig reversal surgery, he can handle a couple dozen laced muffins.

[@asparagus3193]

I can’t tell if they’re making fun of parenting experts or the people who get mad at parenting experts

[@willmanning3819]

Thats the point

[@bando7567]

Yes.

[@kaushalsuvarna5156]

Both

[@zapkvr]

Neither

[@ginunggagap]

Both haha

[@oddball_oddity]

The caption, meanwhile: "Stay Tuned! Rebecca will be gone soon!" 🙁 😂

[@gsgaming6976]

Omfg I missed that.

[@markan398]

Parenting expert: (any occupation) is actually a lot like being a mom...

[@zaarongaming8174]

Nascar racing is actually a lot like being a mom, those cars are moving so fast and are so out of control just like your children and there's a ton of bumps and crashes on the way!

[@BhBc8f8]

@@zaarongaming8174 facts

[@thomasbonse]

Or a babysitter

[@bayupran]

Or a pimp

[@emeraldfinder5]

Being a professional assassin is a lot like being a mom, you need to make sure the target goes to sleep before it’s too late, much like your children at night time.

[@andrep4805]

'I can't believe she actually answered that' lol

[@metoo3342]

Andre P Dont quote something if its not even what was actually said

[@murn3229]

Can you not even remember a single stupid line?

[@Xrelent]

"I can't believe people actually liked OP's comment" lmao

[@naominewman710]

me too it was said.

[@ZectonplaysMC]

AND SHE JUST SMILESS

[@myblacklab7]

This is so good that I'm at a loss for words to add to it, and I'm a real blabbermouth.

[@sidhu139]

If you really are a blabbermouth, why did it take you so long to comment? It's been seven years.

[@Oncus2]

Brilliant, making fun of both sides, and not always clear which side is the receiving end.

[@MikkoMurmeli]

Yup, you have to be equal these days, so everybody's a cunt :D

[@Michael-es4dt]

@@MikkoMurmeli it's not discrimination if you hate everyone ✌️❤️

[@shahidchaudhary52]

Its you

[@JosephFlores-yn4yi]

@@improbabbel8362 every child is different, and sometimes talking in general when it comes to raising kids is not the best thing Altought this a common error beetwen experts and parents

[@HorrorLover]

@@improbabbel8362 I'm late, but the other side is how irrationally angry the hosts (Who act as the "Angry parent" side) were at even the notion of someone suggesting that their parenting could be improved, also shown by the fact that they talk over her and refuse to listen at all ("Just keep playing the questions, dont let her answer" because they dont want to five her a platform at all.

[@thepoglin8479]

i love how she just laughs and smiles whenever they act passive agresive like its completely normal well then again it probably is to her

[@curlamus4452]

This is satire you small brained oaf

[@alvallac2171]

*aggressive

[@ArDeeMee]

@@alvallac2171 This is a two year old comment. Just… *why*?

[@Quinxed]

@@ArDeeMee When the grammar urge kicks in, you can't stop it

[@genericname8727]

@@ArDeeMee I thought the correction was about how the aggression wasn’t very passive lol I missed that typo

[@KelticStingray]

i feel like this sort of content is great for language learning. You can't read any of the body language or facial expressions for context to verify if your translation is correct.

[@Lamenters1stCompanyCpt]

This is actually genius

[@davidschwimmer7940]

Language acquisition is heavily contextual so, if anything, it's really bad

[@KelticStingray]

@@davidschwimmer7940 I feel like you deliberately missed the point where I said "can't read context to verify". You saying blind people aren't capable of communication?

[@davidschwimmer7940]

@@KelticStingray No I'm saying that for people who can see, learning a language is highly dependent on exposure and context based clues. A video where the words and visual context clues are inconsistent would be bad for learning English.

[@KelticStingray]

@@davidschwimmer7940 well I guess I fundamentally disagree

[@CHRB-nn6qp]

Jim's actor is phenomenal. I've just noticed that the way he introduces Rebecca at the start has a very subtle passive-aggressive tinge of annoyance to it.

[@FlyingOverTr0ut]

Does anyone test the volume levels before uploading the video? I had to nearly turn my volume all the way up to hear this video.

[@midivilplanet]

You guys have some shitty speakers

[@elocfreidon]

midivilplanet That depends on the volume of the video itself. Other times they are really good speakers depending on which video I'm watching.

[@ThatIckyGuy]

I had no problem with the audio in this video.

[@JacobHartnett]

Yes, the audio is a bit low.

[@GreatWhite7]

Yeah pretty low but still pretty funny.

[@nathangehman7018]

"NO SERIOUSLY GO AHEAD" "Oh my god, she *actually* answered it." comedy gold right here

[@MrsKwan-fz6mf]

I'm still waiting to hear about the strange devices Chinese people use instead of forks🤔🤔🤔

[@brittneynicole5358]

Chop sticks

[@camryncleveland2462]

@@brittneynicole5358 r/wooooosh

[@pumpkin6429]

@@camryncleveland2462 Go back to reddit. Now. 😐

[@plugshirt1684]

Pumpkin this is the equivalent of telling someone not to link a KZbin video outside of KZbin

[@princessketamine0]

forkchops

[@sergiomissaglia6380]

“Hi Rebecca. my question is, how much do your kids hate you, a little, or a lot ?” I can’t stop watching the grin on his face 😂😂😂

[@Dremekeks]

*_I feel like the actors are absolute legends for keeping straight faces. The laughing that must've gone on after the cameras finished rolling.._*

[@theofficialsikris]

I wanna know how many takes it took for them to actually get it so flawless, I would fucking die laughing every time.

[@PopTap]

It’s called being professional

[@theoriginaltommysteward]

@@PopTap Or it's called editing. Take your professionalism and shove it up your ass!

[@nonconsensualopinion]

@@PopTap oh, professional actors don't goof up? Can't wait until humanity gets its first real actor!

[@zapkvr]

It's satire. It's kind of the point. The British do it a lot better

[@atthesunrise]

At 1:03, he looks at the camera and says, "Sure." The expression is priceless. Look at the way he gazes off to his lower right, as though he's lost in thought or thinking of some harrowing memory.

[@Jimbogf]

Oh my gosh.. she actually answered. lol

[@wallamazoo01]

As a father of four kids, I have been on both sides of this argument. This level of satire is thick like molasses, it’s great. “Every chore they finish, add 10 more minutes of tv time, they go crazy on that deal.” “Yeah you don’t know my kids.”

[@Maxinestabile]

Have you ever tried that on your kids or have you just decided that it won’t work?

[@wallamazoo01]

I’m glad you asked! TV has turned out to be like a drug, my kids are so addicted to screens that it impairs their abilities to do anything else. The metaphor is this: I’ll give you a dose of heroin whenever you clean your room. The addict was so excited they stole the house for heroin as no house is a clean house.

[@DrDiabolical000]

​@@wallamazoo01yeah if possible the idea should be to create a mentality to do chores, why do we do them and why is it needed. Using tv or any other thing.. I am not sure what mentality that creates. That being said, a parent should listen to themselves first and then someone else. They do know their kids better than anyone else. General guidance and advice shouldn't be given as judgements.

[@wolf-xf6hf]

Honestly frame it as an exchange of goods but not a right to live. Dont say you live in the house I pay for so you have to do the chores because thats your job to provide no matter what. But if they want xbox or to use the car or their phone plan to not be canceled then they have to do the chores. They do chores in exchange for extra but not for basic rights like food, housing, and good clothes

[@KicksPregnantWomen]

children should watch 0 tv at all

[@Lucy-fn9rj]

i’m working in a child psychology research lab right now and let me tell you, presenting research on healthy parenting feels very strange when you’re a childless 20-year-old. i get it, rebecca.

[@monkeybusinessasusuall5467]

Underrated comment

[@AM-bf9tb]

Have kids then.

[@chaitanya8126]

Go kidnap done

[@mfzoom5401]

@@AM-bf9tb Nah fuck that.

[@AM-bf9tb]

@@mfzoom5401 enjoy your meaningless life.

[@arletteniragira511]

"Oh my god. She actually answered." Be right back. Dying 😂

[@lagrangepoint9386]

You still dead?

[@tubwaiyan6776]

@@lagrangepoint9386 He is still dying

[@BusyAngel9999]

The extra layer of satire is, the hosts are acting like children who can’t listen to suggestion and the guest is still smiley and talking to them like theyre children with a cheery tone of voice. Quite hilarious

[@moistnugget4147]

nobody likes unsolicited advice, to be fair

[@BusyAngel9999]

Moist nugget well that’s the first layer of satire in this brilliant news segment. Gosh what are we without the news...

[@moistnugget4147]

@@BusyAngel9999 yea I got that, Rose

[@Luca48882]

Moist nugget There's a big difference between not liking something because actual reasons and not liking something because you're confronted with truth. And it's not just for advices, but for stuff like blame/guilt too. That's the point sometimes: you not liking it it's exactly what should trigger the change and instead people hide like always

[@moistnugget4147]

What's the weather like up there on that high horse?

[@RomanesEuntDomus.]

I love that Rebecca is always smiling despite the insults. She's so lovely!!

[@boglenight1551]

Parenting expert: Gets a PH.D in developmental psychology. Insecure parents: “this means nothing” Btw, this isn’t to say that experience isn’t valuable or that people can do a fantastically decent job at raising kids without knowledge of development psychology, consider any significant figure chances are their parents didn’t have any knowledge of development psychology, HOWEVER development psychology is a valid study and it is one that solely focuses on the psychological development of humans, it is a methodical and analytical study of how humans development and what helps them develop well, just because you can do an amazing job raising children without use of that source of knowledge doesn’t mean that knowledge of developmental psychology shared by someone who spent years studying it is unlikely to help or be beneficial.

[@jrg305]

Same for being a licensed dietitian.

[@boglenight1551]

jrg305 Yeah, unfortunately it’s the same for quite a few fields of expertise

[@draco89123]

Don't know about developmental psychology but developmental pediatricians are worth their weight in gold.

[@BigUriel]

Insecure parents: I don't need parenting advice from anyone because I raised two kids myself Kids: One pregnant at 16 and the other in juvie

[@robezy0]

Psychology is a touchy subject because everybody has _some_ knowledge on it but most people simultaneously overestimate their knowledge as well. That's why psychologists nowadays don't directly people what to do but instead steer them towards the answer to make them _believe_ they have come up with it by themselves and respect it. The only side effect is that people think they're smart and the psychologist didn't do anything

[@WingsTM]

Ahaha that eye-roll and jerk off gesture 1:34 I'm so glad I'm not the only one who does that

[@MrUmakemelaff]

Do you kiss your parents with that mouth, Brucie? Oh...right...no parents...

[@MsCunningLinguistic]

Personally I go for a cross-eyed deadpan look while I do the jerk off gesture, but I feel we can all our own little flair to it.

[@vegan4theanimals]

Lmao how did I miss that?

[@misanthropicisolation4013]

@@MrUmakemelaff *O O F*

[@Leonion6]

What is that gesture even supposed to mean in this context? Like, I get what it means, but it seems as out of place as, say, suddenly waving "hello" in the middle of a conversation.

[@dangeroussneeze66]

This is legit the only News Station that isn’t fake

[@sevenhoursbehind2048]

lmao 😂

[@justforjacob]

it's all so well written and well acted. truly underrated. they are working with some real talent.

[@MRayner59]

Brilliant. So great to see _Today Now!_ back and as snarky as ever.

[@ciarel]

Rebecca's "book" includes an entire chapter on wearing pants with a lot of pockets. 🤣

[@notosure2148]

That's about the point the real parents go, yeah- the know it all, knows what she's talking about.

[@iceeee1245]

That’s actually good advice tho you can never have too many pockets

[@crisf6400]

"Book" 😂😂😂😂😂

[@eminosose]

Just keep playing the questions...HAHAHAHA!!!

[@CaveraGamerzZ]

These actors are fucking brilliant, how can they do this passive-agressive but extremely agressive and smile like everything is ok, it's just mind-blowing how good they are

[@alvallac2171]

*aggressive

[@NonisLuck]

I'm always impressed with how real they make it all look and sound. Kudos

[@VillemarMxO]

I so need to make a gif of Tracy Gill making that "fuck this bullshit" gesture.

[@TobyWoby]

Is that really what it means?

[@VillemarMxO]

Toby Woby I was being PG-13 for some unknown reason, but you're not wrong!

[@TobyWoby]

I found out it means "masturbate," eek.

[@rachell452]

"Stay tuned! Rebecca will be gone soon! " 2:42 looooool😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@sarahruns262]

“Let’s just jump right in and get this over with.“ “Just by looking at your smug face I can tell you have more to say.” “Since we won’t be talked down to for another minute...” Just gold.

[@jevicci]

Love the way the guy at 2:21 smiles at the end of the question.

[@spinecraft1356]

2:36 Stay tuned! Rebecca will be gone soon! 🤣

[@CityWhisperer]

0:21 “My first question is, who the hell do you think you are telling me how to raise my kids?” **laughs randomly** lmao 😂

[@paracosmx7684]

2:45 the silence after that was the perfect ending

[@gracetaveo2733]

I really lost it when she said “fuck you”

[@ajw5388]

“Oh god, she actually answered it” 😂

[@angelgr696]

HAHAHAHAHAHHA this is too funny

[@internetcomment4440]

-AngelGr- vivienne!

[@jasonnguyen3246]

vivienne westwood moment

[@MisterPikol]

2k upvotes everybody

[@Ajwad99]

“Stay tuned! Rebecca will be gone” I laughed waay too hard at this

[@veejonesify]

‘Let’s just jump right in and get this over with!’

[@Tesla_Death_Ray]

"wow i bet a lot of mums watching right now are thinking 'fuck you.'" HAHAHA!

[@Nozomi357]

1:33 this made me cry laughing, thank you

[@adayinforever]

Bro I've been watching this for years and i just noticed that, was about to comment on it, but here you are.

[@Neldog13]

parents who get irrationally mad at parenting experts for trying to help them raise kids are so weird, its like ive been living in my own body for so many years but i still go to the doctors when i have health issues lol

[@UmUs]

Actual good comment with a good opinion wtf

[@DeluxBass]

I mean if the advice is asked for people are generally ok with it. Sadly most of the time parenting experts just give it unasked which makes the parents pissed and makes the expert come across as an asshole. It's the major flaw of people who are experts in any field; they kind of butt in when they're not wanted (I do the same)

[@mrslasher1064]

Having a disease isn't the same as raising a kid,what most parenting "experts" don't understand is that every child is different,they have different behaviors and different needs,so what worked for their kids might not work for the children of other people Don't even get me started on the ones who don't have kids and then try to preach to actual parents,for those people I'm gonna quote my own father "Write me a fucking book lady,so you can watch me burn it" And "If I want your opinion,I'll beat it out of you"

[@DeluxBass]

@@mrslasher1064 I love the first quote

[@alenor210]

@@mrslasher1064 while that is true, it doesn’t change the fact that parenting is a learned skill. The fact that you had unprotected sex doesn’t automatically teach you how to be a parent, and there are way too many parents out there that are wholly unprepared to raise children but too prideful to admit it.

[@7wnb]

“Just by looking at your smug face” lmao 🤣 this is genius!!

[@360.Tapestry]

"i was born to be real, not perfect" - people who've been hungover in jail

[@AUSTIN-ss2zd]

How would you know that

[@Guztav1337]

Yeah, sure. But when somebodys realness is hurting other people, that's when we have a problem.

[@redrobsanthem9206]

@@AUSTIN-ss2zd it’s a law of science

[@AUSTIN-ss2zd]

@@Guztav1337 name an example

[@AUSTIN-ss2zd]

@Kenura Medagedara why my friend? You are the truth if family members and friends don't see that then they may be toxic

[@greasehardbody4018]

The glance Jim throws at Tracy when Rebecca starts talking speaks a thousand words

[@johnheart6890]

Please bring this show back! It is so well acted and so well written!

[@bipo819]

Whenever I watch the onion I feel like I’m in the twilight zone Edit: I regret this comment

[@zapkvr]

How do you know you arent there now?

[@bipo819]

@@zapkvr shhhhhh stfu

[@akpokemon]

a twilight zone where I feel the world is blissfully understood, for just a few minutes

[@Christian_Prepper]

*So, when exactly does a parent know enough so as not to have to listen to anyone else's advice? At conception or birth of their child? Because many sure act like they know it all.*

[@gabrielclark1425]

Because the shit she was spewing only works if the child has a very specific personality.

[@IAmebAdger]

A complicated question for sure. When does knowledge come into being during the developmental stages of a human being? A functioning brain is a prerequisite I suppose, but how do you pinpoint when the first bit of knowledge forms inside of there? Perhaps one shouldn't see it as a cutoff point between no knowledge and some knowledge, but sort of a gradual transition area? Does information inscribed into the genetic material after the egg and sperm meet count as knowledge? Ah, who am I kidding, who wants to think about this stuff under an onion video.

[@emberhermin52]

Never.

[@hiltonchapman4844]

@Christian Prepper: Re your "So, when exactly does a parent know enough so as not to have to listen to anyone else's advice? At conception or at birth of their child?" Good question. If you think about it, good parenting is a gift of education.... the education you harvested as a gift from your own parents. Main thing is - concept of family. This hookup - breakup culture will never provide good parenting, hence no education, hence no idea of how to parent your child. The laissez-faire that you see in today's childrearing context is only due to ignorance on the part of the child rearer. Knowing nothing, he/she errs on the side of laxity. Doesn't work out well. HC-JAIPUR (25/05/2021)

[@zapkvr]

At the point of conception

[@CityWhisperer]

1:33 LMAO 😂 HER EXPRESSION AND GESTURE IM DYING 😂

[@dawaey9183]

“Oh my god…she actually answered it” I literally choked on my food from laughing

[@spencerjohnson7103]

That extra moment of silence at the end was the most perfect thing

[@FoxtrotGolfLima]

1:39 I’m writing a book and seeing quotations around the word made me fall over laughing

[@theinternetpolice2078]

How dare you tell me that corporal punishment teaches your kids to be deceptive and sneaky in order to avoid punishment?

[@noneofyogoddamnbusiness362]

Your kids are gonna be sneaky regardless.

[@adgato75]

That's a pretty good life lesson , really. Sometimes you have to be sneaky and deceptive in your adult life.

[@wolf-xf6hf]

@@noneofyogoddamnbusiness362no not really if you are genrally pretty reasonable avout expectations then your kids wont feel a great need to lie

[@VeryPeeved]

@@adgato75 Yeah, learning to be stealthy and not to rely on authority figures for anything are some of the most valuable lessons you can teach a child.

[@firelordOzai3]

The “oh my god, she actually answered it” broke me😂😂😂😂😂

[@MusikCassette]

considering how much of a pair of jerks Jim and Tracy are she is not remotely condescending enough.

[@PiracyMan]

@@MusikCassette what did they do wrong?

[@MusikCassette]

@@PiracyMan everything. question: are you sometimes a douche bag to people who explain something to you?

[@theeyehead3437]

That last second of stunned silence is the difference between a funny joke and great comedy.

[@hgg1639]

Once at church we sat behind a family with the same number of kids as our family (7) and my dad made a comment to them about how well behaved their young boys were, and the mom gave him a 5 minute lecture about discipline and running a tight ship......

[@RedVelvet_EdgeMuffin]

I’m in the hospital right now. Just got a tonsillectomy. Sitting here rn laughing my ass off and all I feel is pain

[@minecraftbro5333]

Oof. Since it's been a week, may I ask how it went?

[@RedVelvet_EdgeMuffin]

Minecraft Bro I got it done on the 18th. The pain was pretty stable for a half week and slowly died down from immense pain to just constant, steady pain as well as not being able to really eat or drink. I’ve lost 15 pounds since then from not being able to eat anything and only drink. I’ll tell ya, when you do start eating, soda will be great to have handy. I drank Dr. Pepper a couple days ago and the carbonation will help push down food that you can’t really chew up entirely that sticks in the back and sides of your mouth. Rn it still kinda tingles and feels weird to swallow so I still sorta flench when doing so. I take pain meds and antiseptic still because it tends to hurt every once in a while and food is still hard to eat. I think this could have all been helpful for me to start dieting. My stomach has shrunk so I get full easier. I typically could eat a Freebird’s burrito easily but I had one yesterday and I only ate about half.

[@minecraftbro5333]

@@RedVelvet_EdgeMuffin oof. Well I'm glad it went well, and that you've found a temporary solution to help. I hope things get better soon!

[@pleasedontlookforme8036]

@@RedVelvet_EdgeMuffin Hope things get back to normal for you soon!

[@mr.v1ct0r]

I would quote a part and say “I’m dead” but the whole sketch was immaculate

[@LewisBowels]

I would love to see the blooper reel of this skit.

[@Dcook85]

1:32 xD I'm dying

[@dibspace0]

I know right haha

[@MorseCodeStutters]

WOW I didn't notice that the first time LOL

[@that_pac123]

Well, to be fair parents do often suck, or atleast aren't as good as they could be, noone teaches them how to parent, it's not something taught in school, they just wing it and act like they know everything, then they get pissed of when someone, like a professional who actually knows what they're talking about, tell them how to raise their kid so they don't grow up bitter and abuse their own children.

[@TacosYBurritos8P]

that_pac12 yes exactly!!

[@MiaMartel64]

You're right Sean. What there does exist though is a varied set of non-violent tools one can pick from and try out, depending on the needs/nature of their own child, as well as a set of violent and/or otherwise damaging tools everyone should absolutely avoid, such as pain-inflicting physical punishment, and getting in screaming matches with your kids instead of reasoning with them.

[@that_pac123]

Well there are certainly wrong ways, and alot of parents, frankly, aren't good at parenting and fuck up to varying degrees along the way, like I said, there's no printing class or anything of the like, it's very easy for someone to just make a child and raise it all the while asserting that their way of parenting is the correct way because they said so with no studies or evidence to back it up, there is a science to this stuff, as there is to everything.

[@jaysahunter256]

You know that’s some really good sentiment. You should write a book about it!

[@datapod]

Sean Sean sure there isn't any specific "way" to raise your kids, but there are definitely ways you shouldn't

[@jackhazardous4008]

My favorite part of the acting is the thinly veiled contempt showing through their smiles