#1 RELATIONSHIP COACH: A Roadmap To Your BEST Love Life | Matthew Hussey x Rich Roll

Rich sits down with Matthew Hussey, the celebrated relationship expert and bestselling author, to discuss the intricacies of modern dating and to raise standards for authentic connection, navigating vulnerabilities, embracing self-worth, exploring breaking toxic cycles, and attracting an equal partnership. To read more about Matthew and peruse the full show notes, go here👉🏾bit.ly/richroll835
✌🏼🌱 - Rich
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CHAPTERS
00:00:00 Intro
00:02:37 The Mission Of Helping People Feel Less Alone
00:04:06 Early Interest In Self-Development
00:06:14 Influences Of Childhood And Teenage Years
00:10:31 Transition To A Vocational Path In Self-Development
00:11:07 The Introduction
00:13:20 Evolution Of Matthew’s Work And Communication Style
00:14:48 Complexities Of Relationships
00:16:25 Unreliability Of Instincts In Relationships
00:19:35 Addiction To Chaos In Relationships
00:21:48 Triggers And Instincts
00:22:43 Highly Charismatic Person
00:25:15 Fundamental Precepts Of Healthy Relationships
00:25:46 Apologizing And Learning
00:27:47 Facing Problems Together
00:32:02 Vulnerability And Acceptance
00:32:44 Sponsor Break
00:33:49 Gender Stereotypes And Vulnerability
00:41:27 Self-Worth And Diversification
00:44:10 Marriage And Personal Growth
00:44:40 Diversifying Success Metrics
00:45:44 Detaching Professional Identity From Personal Growth
00:46:14 Self-Reflection And Denial
00:48:06 Locking Into Personal Truths
00:51:59 Early Relationship Dynamics
01:00:59 Spotting Red Flags And Self-Trust
01:03:12 Having Difficult Conversations
01:04:19 Sponsor Break
01:05:21 Navigating Conflict And Disagreements
01:07:02 Understanding Consequences And Setting Standards
01:08:09 Navigating Teething Periods And Establishing Culture
01:09:55 Identifying And Addressing Personal Behavior
01:11:47 Conflict Resolution And Knowing Oneself
01:15:48 Anticipating Each Other’s Needs
01:16:20 Misconceptions About Men And Women
01:18:49 Challenges In Modern Dating
01:24:07 Values And Authenticity In Relationships
01:28:16 The Endless Search For Perfection
01:29:00 Investing In A Relationship
01:29:29 Settling And Commitment
01:30:33 Building A Relationship Over Time
01:31:57 Creating Something Extraordinary
01:34:39 Mutual Respect For Individual Growth
01:36:49 Maintaining Mystery And Newness
01:38:12 Overcoming Challenges In A Relationship
01:42:44 Encouraging Individuality In A Relationship
01:44:56 Engineering Quality Time
01:48:38 Creating Intimacy In The Midst Of Chaos
01:49:38 Intensity And Wiring
01:51:12 Finding A Sustainable Fix
01:52:06 Internal Patterns And Unraveling
01:53:48 Fear Of Taking Foot Off The Gas
01:54:29 Impact Of Social Media Absence
01:56:28 Balancing Work And Sustainability
02:00:16 Communication And Authenticity
02:05:59 Normalizing The Search For Love
02:08:55 Curiosity As A Gateway To Change
02:11:00 Closing Remarks: Compassion And Sensitivity
02:12:19 Credits
FILMED AND EDITED BY BLAKE CURTIS & DAN DRAKE
www.blakecurtis.net/
www.dandrake333.com/
* * * * *
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Hi I'm Rich Roll. I'm a vegan ultra-endurance athlete, author, podcaster, public speaker & wellness evangelist. But mainly I'm a dad of four. If you want to know more, visit my website or check out these two the NY Times articles:
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#richroll #richrollpodcast

[@richroll]

Thanks for watching! Don’t miss out on these exclusive offers: COZY EARTH: Use code RICHROLL for 35% OFF 👉 bit.ly/cozyearth2024 EIGHT SLEEP: Use code RICHROLL to get $350 OFF Pod 4 Ultra 👉bit.ly/Eightsleep2024

[@marietavandeva4432]

Love this talk so much you paxked so many aspects auper helpful. Thank you for your hreat work and support.

[@thematthewhussey]

As a big fan of both Rich and the Rich Roll Podcast, I was delighted to be able to have this conversation. Hope you all enjoy!

[@GOD999MODE]

There's no way you weren't drowning in 🐈 with a DJ and Nightclub owner Dad, being around that environment from a young age bro.

[@swenderich]

I read this quote in German a long time ago and it always stuck with me: “love me the most when I deserve it the least, because that’s when I need it the most” I remembered it while listening to this great conversation. Thank you ❤️

[@jcszot]

One of the best quotes I saw on Pinterest and I can’t remember the person I should credit it to but here it is……” between what is said and not meant and what is meant and not said most loves are lost.”

[@lucycollins9193]

That feeling you get when you know you are listening to the best pod caster in the world - when Matt opens by saying: “I’ve been following your work for years now and some of your interviews are literally some my favorite interviews - I’ve heard” The gratitude flows from us all when deep diving with you Rich! Plants 🌱

[@sweetoneo5]

I love how Rich and Matthew turned this into a mini class and example of men engaged in thoughtful conversation, almost a mentoring session of Rich to Matthew. Great demonstration of how men can have these conversations.

[@Change_Everything]

That’s the type of conversation and support you get in 12 step fellowship

[@christinagray6545]

Grateful to see Matthew on here. I've been following his work for years. Happy to hear he has found his person.

[@MelodyProsser]

My firs thought when I saw today's guest was, "Oh no! Rich is now having guests that everyone else has." Then I listened and it was beyond the usual conversation....as usual for Rich. LOL, thank you for the opportunity for me to examine my preconceived notions! As always, it was a helpful conversation.

[@youtubepremium44]

2 years back I went through a painful breakup, and during my time grieving that loss, I found Matthew Hussey. His lectures were the primary thing that got me through the pain. I hadn’t thought about him since then, but I just recently went through another breakup a couple weeks back. I had fallen out of my self-help journey and wasn’t listening to Rich anymore, so to see that Matthew went on this podcast just a couple weeks before I needed his advice again feels like a sign. Time to get back on the horse. Thank you Rich and Matthew for changing lives

[@ST_RISE]

The feeling of not being valued or treated “cheap” after an encounter with someone is a triggering feeling for me. I no longer want to attract encounters like this in my life anymore. I just finished the Love Life book and it was a game changer. It’s like the curtain is lifted and I can’t go back to the way I look and interact in relationships anymore. Thank you Matthew as I feel our journey is just starting.

[@peacefulisland67]

When we make another person our "God", the One who is responsible for "making" us feel good or bad, we're setting ourselves up to be not just disappointed, but exposed to the very things that disrupted our systems and views to begin with. When I run into people who "trigger" my instincts, that is the time to practice inhabiting my life and my body. Expand that liminal space between event and response. It's the hardest work I'll ever do, but the most mind blowing.

[@Lovescomedy87]

I think we need FRIEND coaches! Everybody wants to jump into a relationship and they don't even know how to be a friend!

[@heatherelizabeth3389]

Take five minutes to write down the complaints you dont have. Simple but magical.

[@bethandalaska]

Matt is the boss. I love how Rick tried to ask personal questions about his own marriage “without asking.” 😉 Matt responded expertly.

[@TerrySmith-rv7tv]

He answered how real experts should respond 😊

[@greenmagic8391]

Dear family, this sanctuary in Ireland is in dire straits too. The government is making them move their herd of cows because their farm has flood due to climate change. Imagine the irony-climate change mostly affected by animal agriculture and this one little sanctuary that does not contribute to climate change by breeding and exploiting cows will be forced to euthanize their herd if they can’t find a new farm to house them!!! And this despite the fact that this herd will never be a danger to the cruel cow meat industry. Please share far and wide to help if you can. Heartstone Veganic Sanctuary

[@Rereshines]

I love that you two came together finally!!!! Two of my favorites!!!!

[@agasobczakwithbraveheart5675]

I’ve absolutely loved this conversion. So real and so deep. Going into living together and even working together after years of being together, changing and letting go, old scarcity mindset and beliefs. Very powerful, authentic and vulnerable 🧡

[@TerrySmith-rv7tv]

Hi dear 😊

[@mickeylana]

This man is wise beyond his years (and years of marriage, lol). I enjoyed this so much, and much credit to Rich as usual for pulling such interesting food for thought and wisdom out of his guest.

[@thecommonsensecapricorn]

Yesss we love Matthew Hussey 🌻🌻 seriously such a wise human being

[@TerrySmith-rv7tv]

Hi dear

[@Beyou1262]

Diversity of where I get my self worth. Brilliant. Life changing. Thank you.

[@keatts23]

alot of great stuff here for men who want to grow and be more mature and continue to grow. I may not be exactly like these guys but they show we can be vulnerable and learn and grow, without fear and ego and resentment. its 12 steps, integrity, some other traditional values but certainly seeing women as equals sans fear. A lot men are very afraid and won't admit it. Afraid of women, failure, etc.

[@almostmade801]

This was absolutely pure nourishment

[@marykimberlyhayes]

Great Conversation and always enjoy witnessing collaboration on both sides of the table. Grasshopper to Sage and back again!

[@loppan4534]

The last part of this conversation was the best, when Matthew starts to ask Rich questions. It becomes like a conversation between two friends

[@rjc98]

Thank you!

[@peacefulisland67]

It's gratifying and validating to hear (hopefully not in a codependent way 😉) someone talking about instinct vs intuition. Instincts are only as helpful or healthy as the mind and body manufacturing and interpreting them. Instinct is more animal and totally necessary to keep me from being distracted by a pretty fish if I'm drowning, or pull my hand away from fire without thinking. Intuition is more contemplative and invokes the spirit of being human.

[@lauramartins879]

This conversation was amazing! I couldn't believe when I saw the two of you have sat together! have been following both of you for many years now and what a gift was to listen to the two of my favorite "internet people" interacting

[@JaneMcCourt]

Issues with modern dating have little to do with high value women being picky. If anything, more men are pickier. In my experience, men are looking for perfection or casual sex, nothing in between.

[@lesliedddawson]

Love the RR pod! Another great conversation.

[@libbywarren6083]

This is the best of Matthew’s talks.❤

[@astghikpashinyan6663]

This might be the best interview of Matthew, loved this❤

[@MilleniumDivaGlamour]

What a fantastic conversation, glad I was able to take the time to listen to the whole thing!

[@user-pe5yp5qn9g]

High quality interview! Loved every bit of it!

[@marietavandeva4432]

Amazing talk, Thank you so much for all shared.

[@margaretwinson402]

Great point about amber lights requiring conversations.

[@Aldrie-qe3lv]

Love the podcast❤

[@loppan4534]

It would be nice to hear you in a conversation with Mark Manson

[@keatts23]

Mario Andretti quote ftw!

[@kennelson3848]

Love 'yourself' first and foremost..it's all there is..never lonely..infinite well of discovery..no need to be 'loved'.

[@naturejelisabeth]

what a nice surprise suggestion from my youtube algorithm💜I really appreciate the work from the both of you (+your teams) and am really looking forward to this one! thanks in advance🌸

[@savanniek]

The end is interesting. Everyone is saying this was a great convo. It was… But towards the end I felt they were both, Rich especially was throwing little jabs “how long have you been married, like a year now” “you can read all the books you want but what are you putting into practice”

[@dianejefferies]

Two amazing men... where can I find one like this??? ❤

[@rjflores438]

Through my life a man I have rarely got a second glance from women so when I have entered into relationships or gone on dates I always feel as though im an imposter.

[@cindydaquino2072]

Sorry to say @richroll your ego was doing a lot of the talking. We get you’re intelligent, articulate and clearly have done a lot of inner work. We both know the real work is to let the other person shine. Not sure how Matthew triggered you, but it was obvious. Matthew was gracious and listened - kudos to him. Hopefully, you take your own advice next time: “I’ve done so much inner work…blah, blah blah” …walk the talk and don’t feel the need to put yourself above by making the other person look bad. Just sayin

[@ShaneHarveyMusic]

🎤 drop. 🎤 drop. Daing guys. 🙏

[@chrisohlsen8078]

Lol, Lol, 😆😄😄 Date Apps suck…. I’m on one. Your conversation is really good. Hence when I do meet someone it will be in person. It will be me stopping to introduce myself. It’s been four years since my last date and that’s how I approached it. And the pyramid is a huge problem.

[@karlstenator]

1:00:59 - Adam Skolnick, are you listening? 😂

[@Chris-hp2gg]

Love is a four letter word.😂

[@MikeJohnCore]

I just woke up from a dream where I dapped up a girl from college that I regret never talking to. I was just a fucked up naive pothead back then. Late 20's regrets. I've learned a lot. Hard to live with.

[@sabinasb2445]

Love yourself,be grateful for your life and health...

[@RedScareClair]

If your life wasn't together you shouldn't have talked to her.

[@heidikamrath1951]

Look her up! Contact her now! Dooooo it!

[@rotcaka]

I was meditating and remembered this night where a friend and I went and hung with a neighbor girl and her friend that was passing through town. Her friend played the piano, we all got tipsy. I too was a stoner, but I look back and remember that night as perfection and I shed a tear, man. I never had a chance with her, but I had my moments. Never kissed her, but she was able to teach me something in a random thought 20 yrs later. You'll start to realize more and more that those moments are still out here and when your moment arises, you'd better have prepared and you Do NOT hesitate. Just like stepping into the ice bath in the morning. Forward! To all the beautiful girls from college and in between, we salute you for reminding us of Our mortality. Do the work Son. And when you're ready, pounce on the next one ✌🏼 @mikejohncore

[@lowenbrandenburg1402]

Wow the haters and desperate people in these comments is just so telling on how many angry people out there who feel like they’re not being heard.

[@CaptainPhilosophical]

34:18 I do feel this way because it has been weaponized against me by my current wife

[@carriesouza7984]

Was it my imagination or was Rich really hammering on him? He made up for it in the end, maybe because he realized it.

[@and.she_Vegas]

Like the therapist was in therapy 😵‍💫

[@carriesouza7984]

@@and.she_Vegas oh yeah, he was getting schooled 🤣

[@MsCristina38]

I think Rich got frustrated because he’s been married a lot longer than Matthew and Matthew’s lack of experience in marriage couldn’t help Rich.

[@christinamarti4441]

Rich was a jerk

[@carriesouza7984]

@@christinamarti4441 I don’t see that often. He’s usually really selective with his words.

[@beatawlodarczyk3405]

Any new stories Matt?

[@mialindvall]

❤️

[@TerrySmith-rv7tv]

Hi mia

[@eerashamdin]

1:55 is he talking about Dr. Glen &Pye??? iF YES, ive noticed this too.. sigh...

[@topvadeboy]

32:00

[@user-lm7zz7rs9q]

Divorce is never the way out, My wife and I have been having issues before I sort out help from a spiritual adviser,i wasn't going to let my marriage of 18years crash

[@PeterBenjamin-zk8xm]

amazing,i am kinda in a similar situation,how did you handle it?

[@user-lm7zz7rs9q]

well not the orthodox way but i was referred by a friend to a spiritual adviser and healer

[@PeterBenjamin-zk8xm]

please how can i get in touch with the spiritual adviser?

[@user-lm7zz7rs9q]

her name is Quelani Eileen Freja, and she is a great spiritual adviser as well as caster

[@user-lm7zz7rs9q]

you can look her name up online and you will find all you need.

[@tonybedi123]

More women are bisexual and they are dating each other, more men are single, do you have any solution

[@peacefulisland67]

I honestly need someone to clarify the Marilyn Monroe comment for me. Like I'm a three year old.

[@worshipprayer8165]

The Lord took me out of the depression of pain, anguish, betrayal, abandonment 2 suicide attempts, loneliness, the emptiness of my heart was filled by my Lord Jesus... I cry when I remember where he took me from, he rescued me and he loved me like no one else...how not to love him...I thank the Lord for everything he did and does for me... I adore you Lord Jesus

[@orangewarm1]

Does this guy have any experience/ qualifications or is he just giving his opinion?

[@schwamp_4479]

The guy attended a few undisclosed seminars in Londen... definitely legit

[@keatts23]

he has a lovely wife, but I dunno. he is a very wealthy successful life coach. he is not a therapist or psychologist. having role models like them is probably a very good thing for a lot of young and old men. not new ideas but quite charming as they say.

[@chareepo]

He doesn't possess the common sense or enough wisdom to provide this type of advice. He has good personal branding and marketing. I first saw him talk about ten years ago. Today, I thought, "Maybe he's gotten better now." Not really. The contrast, when listening to Rich's rich insights, is abysmal.

[@keatts23]

@@chareepo people write books and do seminars like Robbins all the time. at least he does not try to get you to walk on hot coals. Its funny the self help book industry and seminars that Robbins created are now facing fierce competition from thousands of equally unqualified influencers and youtubers. charisma, good looking, nice accent, must be legit!

[@keatts23]

@@schwamp_4479 he also dated a 20 yr old. But he seems like a nice guy. Basically a normal self help guru. M Scott Peck was very popular and he was nutty too. The People of the Lie was nuts.

[@rabbychan]

Matthew Pussey

[@thecommonsensecapricorn]

What a loser comment lol

[@benholden8750]

You need to spend more time indoors Rich your skin is turning into a sort of brown glowing leather 😂

[@keatts23]

he sleeps in a tent, he is a caveman 😆

[@tofuneverbleeds]

Why the need to comment on physical appearance?

[@cox4154]

Rich ending up being more interesting than the host is something !! Matthew didn't bring anything different from the other podcasts that he did before if you follow his work... Always the same small stories and, I quite find him less and less impactful... even though I am currently reading his book. Weird... Like, he talks a lot and changes his voice all the time, which sounds fake, not to say so much in the end... Thanks for the work though.

[@emiliadrogaris8517]

This man says very basic things, never anything new, and not for nothing but u don't bring enough women on. He is so mundane. Women have newer, deeper, more interesting things to say. PLEASE CATCH UP.

[@keatts23]

Rich had his own wife and other women on, recently.

[@ZakBurrell]

Relationship coach 😂 he's probably only dated nothing above a 3 guess you content creators scrape up what you can get.

[@keatts23]

oh you've seen his wife and others? he does ok.