The TikTok Minion Conspiracy

[@veryreallygood]

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[@selma1250]

im driving bus

[@meowing-boy]

@@selma1250he driving bus

[@kathymathy368]

HOW DID U COMMENT THIS TWO HOURS AGO WHEN IT CAME OUT 40 MINUTES AGO??

[@Alden_360]

My guy broke the space time continuum

[@sir-ryan-the-dumb]

Y'all do realize that videos can be unlisted before they're made public, right?

[@mewymax]

"i call her george because she got that w bush" made me actually laugh out loud

[@dddingdddong9000]

Literally

[@worm.on.a.string.]

400th like and this is literally so real

[@RonnieRhea]

Literally best bar I've ever heard

[@kailajensen1021]

adding this line into my emo rap band's song just for Kurtis

[@Caoba_]

ME TOO 😭😭😭😭

[@justlanden]

kurtis is laughing but as an artist I can't count the amount of accidental Minion crucifixions I've painted in my day

[@audreyisL]

“for Gru so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten minion.”

[@annikam1272]

Bob 3:16

[@maddylions5680]

I love them all implying the animator like accidentally animated that😭 like they just stumbled into it what😭😭

[@PlagueRavenRX]

It's not even animated... it's a still image.

[@S0ap_Bvbbl3z]

I hate it when I accidentally create an image of a crucified minion😭

[@merino8482]

WAKE UP BABE!! VIDEO TO PLAY QUIETLY ON YOUR PHONE WHILE YOU TRY TO SLEEP JUST RELEASED

[@danibee1]

real

[@emilemig5]

Me rn!

[@HygeiahTagulo]

IN TTHOUGGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE THAT DID THI

[@HygeiahTagulo]

@@emilemig5 go to sleep

[@inkydinky9626]

you woke babe back up so they could fall asleep to vrg 💀

[@t00ti3]

its so funny how they keep saying "an animator was messing around" as if that is not the most classic ai generated photo ive ever seen

[@achicken5422]

I think the original grucified image is actually a 3d model but the rest of the images they’re using are very obviously not 😭 tho considering how these people act I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re AI generated

[@achicken5422]

*they’re as in the people are AI generated, the images are very clearly terrible AI

[@JohnPruden]

The original was actually made by a graphic designer. Vox interviewed him for Today Explained.

[@nea3784]

she tiktok to my minion till I conspiracy🗣️🙏🏻

[@iamgreg8352]

Right right

[@oopsihaveknives]

Tattoo this on my forearm

[@clewis18383]

Ok now thats a bar

[@airbearr]

she conspiracy on my tiktok til I minion 🥶

[@caiooliveira4964]

She Tiks my Tok until I minion

[@aspenator3786]

"i was trying to do a still-life of a bowl of fruit, i don't know what happened, i made a picture of a crucified minion with a crown of thorns and nails through his three-fingered hands" SENT me

[@scully7385]

“A crown of thrones on his little minion head” will be something I quote for the rest of time 😭😭

[@kathymathy368]

She grucify on my minion til I die for her sins

[@lillymyers-f711]

4+4?

[@heyytheredemons]

​@@lillymyers-f711ATE

[@Teddybxxrzz]

​@@lillymyers-f71122

[@tyler42537]

Banger

[@bashbashfulsson4540]

This dealt me 8d6 psychic damage, thank you

[@sabrina-ss88]

threw me off guard when you asked your editor sabrina to add the peanut butter baby clip in… thought i was tripping so hard that bro started talking directly to me lmao mb

[@elledayooo]

help😭

[@eternallustformedusa4844]

he was talking to you sabrina. we can see you through the screen sabrina.

[@sabrina-ss88]

@@eternallustformedusa4844 damn it!!!!!!

[@namelesspersonakaneonwaffles]

😂

[@LOVING_THE_ALIEN]

Okay but he was talking to u tho. Have some respect

[@officalalpha]

kurtis should do a whole episode in an Australian accent

[@User-kt8nh]

as an australian, ... please

[@lucindao4290]

can u pls tel him not to ple

[@xoticbell]

@@User-kt8nhyou don’t exist

[@User-kt8nh]

@@xoticbell shhh dont tell anyone

[@Aaaaaaarrrpirate]

@@xoticbell [...]

[@halglass4751]

As an animation student, the crucified minion has actually become a huge problem among my peers. Almost my entire class failed their final films this year because whenever they were randomly working on their projects, they suddenly created pictures of minions on the cross, complete with crowns of thorns on their heads and nails through their little three fingered hands :(

[@rachelnotluf4585]

You guys, I’m starting to think a minion really DID die for our sins… these people are trying way too hard to convince us otherwise.

[@Danny-js7nk]

i love the suspense that’s built while kurtis is picking a sound effect it’s like oh man what’s it gonna be

[@mememachine9989]

The ten giving me top call me mojo is actually INSANE youre a fucking poet Kurtis

[@EvanTheSaiyan26]

🎵You go down just like yellow Minion, Minion on a, Minion on a cross🎵

[@anomalousanimates]

i am rectanglular i m' efeleling it in my bones i amnreactangular, i avhe no hole i ma eracteangerular, i feem lit my bones i am retancgeruar, and you're a circle

[@EvanTheSaiyan26]

@@anomalousanimates what

[@anomalousanimates]

@@EvanTheSaiyan26 I am rectangular, I feel it in my bones I am rectangular, I feel no hole I am rectangular, and you are a circle I am rectangular, I feel no hole

[@ashgallego7780]

not just another purple minion, minion on a, minion on a cross

[@semicolon.advocate]

What song is this referencing I'm out of the loop 😅

[@grandpeepawpaw]

bro I just finished writing another chapter of my minion x freddy fazbear smut book and I get onto youtube to see see my favorite podcast posted an episode about minions?? thank you Kurt, you made my day🙏🙏

[@SpaceArrow222]

your profile picture is truly a sight to behold, it brings tears to one's orbs

[@Ausvwidabix2blorange]

where can i read this🤑

[@snailuka]

your. your what

[@Tabth3778]

Excuse me what

[@koreydanslemaison6275]

Alright

[@niteowl9491]

I love how they all just say "an animator was ""messing around"" and randomly somehow created the completely original image of a minion being crucified, just, outta nowhere"

[@rhiannonkooy]

“bop bop bop bop to the top! KZbin makes me want to die sometimes” 😔

[@koffinkiss]

23:00 I gotta point out a cool but not important coincidence that the "minion on a cross🎶" in the tune of Ghost's song Mary on a Cross with the "grucified minion" joke right after because the band Ghost's logo is actually called a Grucifix

[@emmaluna6030]

As a Ghost fan I also noticed this 😭

[@julieneff9408]

Reading the comments to see if someone mentioned this. I laughed when I heard grucifix out loud.

[@MichaelSwolfs]

Phew, I'm not the only one who noticed 💀

[@frannie6930]

3:51 lmao WHAT are you DOINGGGG

[@stygggal]

Yesterday, my dog that I had since I was 8 died, and the day before that was my birthday. It’s been like really really hard, but I found myself trying to distract myself from it. I’m glad this came out in time. Thank you for doing what you do. :)

[@smashleydee]

I'm sorry for your loss, hot dawg bong. HBD

[@allieeee6988]

i recently lost my dog i’ve had since i was 3 or 4, so you’re not alone in what you’re going through, so much love for you right now. I feel my dog’s presence in so many things, I know she’s with me, and I don’t doubt your pup is also watching over you now ❤️

[@sugarplum7527]

I hope you feel better soon!!!

[@jadec1828]

I put my dog down yesterday too… I also got her when I was 8. I remember the day we brought her home. It sucks growing up..

[@heavensjustahead]

hugs

[@lobsterlover252]

PLEASE does anyone remember the episode when he talked about when eminem tweeted ”minions got my back, shout out to gru and them” it was so funny

[@hogwarts_dropout5563]

I'd like to think that the animator "messing around" was them on incognito mode at 2 AM making the minion being grucified and they keep listening for their moms footsteps to make sure she doesn't walk in

[@thebisexualghost]

God, i hate when I'm drawing and suddenly a minion nailed to a cross suddenly appears on the paper.

[@dancincoolkid]

not "he died for our sinions" lmfaoooooo

[@wren000]

you go down just like holy minion.... minion on a....... minion on a cross ................

[@wren000]

fuck he said it

[@koreydanslemaison6275]

@@wren000devastating

[@willcappello]

« Thank you Mr. Mayor! », we all say in unison

[@themusicaljunkie37]

Is this a reference to something or is this the new trendy KZbin comment inside joke?

[@themusicaljunkie37]

"go back to sleep!" >>The voices in my head said.

[@AlexSheMakes]

I can’t like it cuz it has 69 likes

[@anomalousanimates]

Gracias Sr. Mayor!

[@kelofthecreek]

@@themusicaljunkie37cant tell if this is a genuine question or not but uh, kurtis is our mayor. our mayor fed us

[@chymomile]

kurtisconnorkurtisconnor! givemekurtisconnor! kurtisconnorkurtisconnor! givemekurtisconnor!

[@gracynbrihn9183]

Can I say that the reason I believe they say “the creator was messing around” consistently is because they are trying to belittle the thought that religious imagery can be created to make people believe anything. Like trying to minimize/take away from the fact that ALL IMAGERY OF JESUS was/is just a creator/artist doing this exact same thing 😂

[@declanhamlin]

beatboxing minion

[@gj5748]

What 🧐🤓

[@chelonianJester]

@@gj5748equius pfp

[@LoLo1k2k3k]

Girl we been knew how to crucify minions 😂😂😂

[@PalatableArrow]

18:30 my headphones died and at full volume my phone continued to play the video. Embarrassed is an understatement.

[@ryleec8073]

accidentally clicked on this video while my phone was in my pocket, and i'm so early. i butt dialed this video 💪

[@moroalisa]

The funeral umbrella part reminded me of a family I saw at work one day. I work as a gardener at a cemetery and one day a party of funeral guests were walking past me like usual, everyone was wearing traditional black, except a mother in a summer dress and her children. One of the kids were wearing colorful tshirt, shorts and A PIKACHU HAT. It was a yellow cap with pikachu face and the ears popping out. At first I was a little shocked of this lack of etiquette, but tbh if it was my funeral I'd appreciate my loved ones wearing their favorite hats.

[@jobo6471]

16:46 "this actually did came from the poscast producer☝️"

[@kateminter4810]

my favorite running theme is kurtis being unable to say the word "Massachusetts"

[@divorced57]

30:00 Missed the opportunity to say "What is instead of getting stoned to death, he got BONED to death?"

[@jade_pillows6842]

Kurtis I accept you into my heart

[@ana-ux4ms]

i love you please don’t die

[@Tabth3778]

that sounds like a threat

[@HetaFreak]

Don't you dare fucking jinx it

[@invisableninja2000]

12:46 my dad used to tell me he was in a run club and he would make me babysit my sister and his friends kids, but it turns out they were actually all swingers

[@evagrace2231]

😭😭😭😭😭

[@abigailjolene]

I’m so sorry ❤

[@PlayerTenji95]

I hope you at least got paid for that.

[@elizabethpadmore850]

36:07 the way kurtis says "what" sounds just like a minion 😭😭

[@jbone877]

The split camera at 20:33 😂

[@JordanNone-t4v]

Minion on a Cross song was top tier. Was filming a makeup reel while I listened and now have a take of me bursting randomly into laughter as I apply eyeshadow.

[@shaniah9322]

1.8 million views is not you being in your flop era 😭

[@kathymathy368]

The minion on a cross moment was beautiful

[@heypikachu276]

As a 3D animator, I am plagued by working for hours on a project only for it to turn into a minion at the last second.

[@canary7641]

The notes app segment made me laugh so hard! keep up the good work kurt!

[@serpentesignis]

I love that bro does his own thing, rolling fuckin solo, it’s inspiring actually.

[@abigaillabar8877]

Your beauty Never really scared me Minion on a Minion on a cross...

[@paulmcconnell3]

That sequence of people saying the same exact Minion script, word-for-word, was torture.

[@Izzybeetle]

NO WAY KURTIS ACTUALLY MADE AN EPISODE ON THIS. I THOUGHT THE CRUCIFIED AI MINIONS WERE JUST A RANDOM THING ON MY AWFUL FYP

[@linkuntpark]

no way he put out a podcast episode right before my shift hell yeah. i've been throwing up all morning this will fix me. thanks kurt

[@freddie_pope]

Kurtis: "you don't hear about the other two people crucified with jesus" Kids who had to go to sunday school on top of going to a Christian/Catholic school: "I know for a fact at one point in my life I was quizzed on their names"

[@abigailjolene]

Fr lmao

[@hollyleigh2000]

Literally

[@Américo_Cruz]

Lol I just happen to be that animator who was messing around, this whole situation blows my mind. Even Forbes and Rolling Stone magazines wrote articles about this!

[@summeroden902]

Kurtis if you read this… YOU HAVE TO post the George w. Bush line… how else will drakes ghost writers find it 😢

[@tanelissegonzalez1982]

“You never hear about the other two guys” makes me laugh cause every Easter service I hear about em😭

[@woeshaling6421]

Well the minion tiktok seems like a typical "goof on the speech impediment dude", but the game of telephone and people surf the wave of engagement either genuinely or ironically. To everyone on the outside, it is incomprehensible

[@kloey.x]

“Flop era” 1.5+ mil views almost every video

[@abigailjolene]

Ik I was like what’s he talking about?? lol

[@DuskZiOXofficial]

holy shit when he first said minion on a cross i thought to myself "minion on a, minion on a cross" and then later on in the video (22:59) he actually sings it to the tune of mary on a cross that i was thinking about LOL

[@TheThingFromMars]

As a ghost fan, they have to do a minion cover of Mary On A Cross

[@doravanhee]

When Kurtis uploads, whether it be a video or a podcast episode, my day is automatically made better

[@ScottCalvinsClause]

I just think it's fun that copypasta is always finding new platforms.

[@shroomnatic]

as soon as he said minion on a cross i was like "is he gonna sing it" and kurtis DELIVERED man hell yeah

[@ashleigh5965]

i think Kurtis saying “Massatooshits” every time is my favorite thing

[@morgancalvert5434]

The way I just sat down for lunch I -

[@myfashionpoint]

Same I literally was about to look for something to watch while I eat and he posted 😭

[@sapphosgirlfriend]

What are we eating today chat? I have goldfish and plain pasta with butter 😩🔥🗣️

[@11sla..X]

Omg I forgot dif timezones existed i thought u were eating lunch at 8:30 😔😔😔

[@sillyguy7034]

@@sapphosgirlfriendTwo chicken melts from Costco 😋

[@morgancalvert5434]

@@11sla..XLMAO

[@nancy36leader90]

those tweets/bars sound like joey valence and brae lyrics 😭

[@piplynn]

minion jesus, i accept you into my life

[@polardanii]

"Jesus I accept you into my life and subscribe."🥰🥰

[@markd6631]

every time she nailed my minion you know that shi gru 😮‍💨🙏

[@jminer25]

Getting top from a ten, she's been watching my mojo

[@BrooklynHeadrick]

Mayor with all due respect the fact that your 10 of 10 flop video is 1.4 million views is crazy

[@Sweet_paralysis]

No actual hate on kurtis but “call me kurtis Conner ‘cause my comedy blows” is a hard bar

[@nattienoodle9236]

when you first said “minion on a cross” i was just waiting for the mary on a cross parody.

[@JulietJane1]

Jesus was a minion and was grucified for our sinions

[@kevinbussi1209]

You cannot convince me that a God exists when Kurtis can say "Reserection" without getting punished...

[@dan-ij7ct]

hello kurt boy

[@rivershaley]

36:50 i regret to inform you that historically crucifixion was done to tens of thousands of people were crucified before jesus allegedly was.

[@sylyslackovic3559]

“If I’m not poopin, I’m loopin” drew gooden at some point

[@HardcoreHunterCadima006]

Yellow wall? One liner bars? Get this man on Hivemind

[@User-kt8nh]

his bars took me out. no one is talking about the peanut butter baby one, thats such a banger.

[@cadrenadams9109]

22:30 “nail that into our 3 little fingers”

[@Jasperlovescheese]

I read this as he said it and it freaked me out

[@MushroomHead224]

​@@Jasperlovescheese OMG SAME WTH

[@Starsongzz]

1:26 Come to my house for the last leg

[@MysticMoods05]

I didn't think it was a flop. You'vr literally replaced my best friend the wall 😂

[@Silly_Weeztart]

Minion I receive you into my heart

[@grace_stehling]

29:55 KURTIS U CANT JUST TALK ABOUT JESUS GETTING SUCKED TO DEATH 😭

[@laurenervin1404]

I'm actually cracking up at the silly umbrella in the sea of sad black ones joke 🤣

[@Altered_ego]

Please come to the south Kurtis!!! I would drive 16 hours to see you but I live in the middle of Texas so that leaves Texas, Louisiana, Oklahoma, New Mexico and some of the dustier parts of Colorado 🥺

[@hannahjacobsma9610]

The funny umbrella thought made me think of the umbrella academy when klaus brings a bright pink umbrella to his dads funeral

[@hannahs_jewelry1]

"we love our mayor" we all say in unison

[@TurbopropPuppy]

since the Minions always serve the most villainous people throughout history do you think Minions nailed Jesus to the cross while serving Rome in the Despicable Me universe

[@Twiddly_Thumb_Tim45_369]

The guy who *accidently* created the minion was quite the "fuck around, find out" situation

[@chameleon33spam]

bro it’s fr everyone’s flop era. as a small artist i’ve been getting like 100 views on my shorts 😭😭

[@lydiamiller6325]

minion on cross is genuinely making me lose my mind

[@ashcatherine04]

“Well it wasn’t Kevin…Stewart” lmao

[@jdelafuente2166]

That peanut butter baby joke made me laugh harder that in should have

[@hollyleigh2000]

As someone who was raised in the Catholic church, we definitely were reminded of the other people who got crucified alongside Jesus. There were a couple prominent stories in the Bible surrounding that

[@kh-wp1mj]

kurtis i receive you into my heart

[@ritaccrane]

That’s Bob on the cross. Don’t disrespect your minions like that 😂😂😂