Bill Burr - Advice: Was He A Virgin

billburr.com/ and www.allthingscomedy.com/

[@rorschach221]

"It sounds like you were having sex with the first robot ever" Fucking dead

[@liveyourbestlife1513]

New Life goal of mine. Be so bad in bed that somebody writes in to the Bill Burr show to complain about me.

[@Friendofmine377]

Gotta live your best life ;) lol

[@wgw1412]

😂😂😂

[@jc.1191]

I believe in you. I think you can out do this guy if you want. 🤣

[@sinuslebastian6366]

Its been 3 years. Were ya able to achieve this and make us proud??

[@emanuel6233]

This guy is hard to beat ngl holy shit that was crazy lmaoo

[@ahmedsultani3028]

It's like someone was giving him vague instructions through a micro earpiece 😂

[@josemiranda791]

Ahmed Sultani this comment killed me 😂

[@franka91]

Omg yes lmao

[@yukionnaslayer1]

Pat to sponge pat to sponge testing testing testing! TESTING AAAAAHHH TE-TESTING

[@jmfan100]

Ahmed Sultani bruh XD

[@codymcgrew4015]

From an early 2000’s Comedy lol

[@derpfromabove7549]

this should definitely count towards community service

[@047Kenny]

Derp From Above funny ass comment

[@anonymoususer480]

Vagina Crusher yeah it’s just a

[@jeffmiller3499]

Lmaooo

[@fe5018]

6:53 "This is why women are so amazing: the fact that she's actually willing to work with this." Lmao, I don't think Bill gets enough credit for when he champions women rather than goofs on them.

[@Chimponaut]

I don't think he's a virgin in secret, from all the honking moves I think he's a clown.

[@ayshah.6541]

i was trying to hold me laughter and when i saw this i just lost it

[@ampmri2434]

LOL!!

[@apealeal3973]

lol

[@iHaveTheDocuments]

Being a virgin is not enough of an excuse for all that. Pulls her hair while she's just laying there? That's weird dude. Just weird.

[@aestheticbaal7390]

Mike Morris Look at your profile picture haha

[@Gutslinger]

No shit. All you need is a little common sense.. In the moments before my first time, the girl kept asking me if I was really a virgin and kept saying that she didn't believe me when I told her that I was.. I guess she had to believe me after my "two strokes and a quiver" performance. Lol

[@NNOutBurger_Gaming]

Gutslinger two stokes and a quiver lmao wtf I never heard that before

[@mastershaneburke]

Give the guy a break they said he was 26 and if he was a virgin that's alot of social pressure put on the dude..she really needs to do a 50 shades of grey on him and she's the controlling one comes in throws him down on the couch or the bed and give the little engine that could a chance and he might surprise ya 😉

[@MCOGroupNews]

@@mastershaneburke Okay but like...has he never seen porn before? Like unless he watches really wierd shit, most of what he did never happens in regular porn lmao.

[@mastermuke411]

"did he get his balls stuck in the zipper" I lost it on that one

[@brettbewley5798]

This guy is absolutely a killer.

[@kingdricklamar3704]

Sounds like Dexter Morgan's first time

[@kyleoconnor7077]

Yeah and in later seasons he was smashing British crumpets like a porn star. Great character development

[@supercarnitas]

Kyle O'Connor and getting head in his old high school classroom lol

[@PlutoTheGod]

I’ve been uncontrollably laughing for about 5 min straight

[@JustSomeGuyOk]

Wow.. I feel embarrassed for this guy..

[@gustavofring8765]

Let's not be judgmental

[@HittokiriBatosai]

lol, he says he's gonna bleep out the town's name but leaves in the fact that it's Bill's hometown

[@thatdudemoe9109]

Lmao

[@pablodebella7695]

lol god bless women, to even be asking politely if this guy was normal or not.

[@stfwho]

COMMENCE CARESSING BEE BOMP BEE BOMP BEE BOMP

[@Blessed.2.Teach.4God]

In case anybody is interested; this exact part (for some reason) made me about die laughing harder than I've laughed in a while.

[@boogernights1]

LMFAO starting losing it at 2:55

[@Pillowcase]

funniest thing i've listen to all week.

[@gustavofring8765]

Yeah

[@ellipses1212]

When bill started comparing him to a robot, I literally choke laughed.

[@doodoobrown7551]

I'm reasonably certain that a lot of these emails are just people trolling

[@futurestrangeofficial]

2:20 Absolutely dead. I feel so bad for this woman, this is one of my favorite podcasts 💀

[@casablanca3277]

Shit had me rolling😂😆😅

[@asupertramp948]

Couldn't stop laughing at this whole thing. 😂😂

[@garyt521]

There is nothing wrong with a woman letting a man know “what” she likes during sex. That’s totally different than telling him how to do it.

[@TheThugnificant]

I can't breathe!! this was hilarious!!!

[@JW-ip1yk]

This is in my top 10 as far as hilarious emails go. 😂

[@eliasortiz8905]

Same

[@jza1926]

“ how was he when he pulled his pants back up ???” 😂😂😂

[@kicknadeadcat]

Sounds exactly what would happen if you dated Rainman.

[@ianmccullough5910]

His horrible attempt at a motorboat maybe lol!!!

[@uberandy666]

Being a virgin has little to do with this. This guy obviously lacks basic understanding of how sex works. Probably grew up in a household that talked about sex as a negative, and a school where they have horribly conservative sex-education.

[@manuelcastaneda1383]

Perfect explanation

[@uploaderofmonkeybath.mp4761]

No he probably has aspergus

[@zerpblerd5966]

@@uploaderofmonkeybath.mp4761 no that's not how that manifests

[@dondonnie8629]

'' this sounds like somebody who can't dance'' HAHAH XD

[@Trynottoblink]

"I gotta start sending DVDs to people [for] who I just can't come up with anything. I got nothing."

[@joee1213]

TEACH HIM!!!! That would be so awesome. And how cool would it be to watch him get better. That’d be so cool of you.

[@zerpblerd5966]

yep More women need to teach/guide guys.

[@gd1846]

The number of times I've heard Bill say "I'm gonna edit that out" while still hearing all the details (years later) is absolutely hilarious 😂

[@ciggytwiggy]

HAHAHAHAHAHA the honking

[@_jadori_175]

3:52 im am in tears!!!!!

[@LoneStarVII]

his nfl reference was perfect lmao.

[@rogerg0834]

First robot..EVER!!! HAHAHHA

[@Mrperson662]

lost it at alternating each eye

[@MarketResearchReading114]

Still...I'm glad you made the seal honking comment...thats something I hadn't thought of.. hahahaha.

[@BeagleEyeVisions]

Maybe by the way she was talking to him before the date he knew they were going to have sex, so he told his buddies and then they made a bet or something like that to see if he could do the most ridiculous shit. Either way this dude sounds fucking awesome!

[@charleshood4418]

To make this work tell him you have a teacher student fantasy where you're the teacher and in that way you can teach him

[@mindfullygreen2870]

Great idea until he nuts 15 seconds in

[@Frawl203]

This is one of my favorite stories it’s fucking gold

[@stevecarey2030]

In answer to your question. YES!

[@Alygoola]

Did he say thank you m'lady and tip his fedora on the way out?

[@DarkMysteriousObject]

Bill Burr getting "weirded out"... lol

[@Hotmustardgas20]

That guy is amazing

[@jerrylee3887]

This guy is a legend

[@ASkepticalHumanOnYouTube]

"Did he get his balls stuck in his zipper?" LOL!

[@DrAlphatier]

Hilarious shit from Bill. Laughed out loud numerous times.

[@paulg687]

It's all in the details -'Was he alternating with each hand... should have been doing that while winking either eye.' just can't stop laughing. I had to stop the podcast in case I missed something while choking on laughing. Seriously Bill, you're a natural genius. Seamless.

[@tinybed]

idk why i just think its so the way he's like "no it wasnt" and doesn't let it go at 0:53

[@jc.1191]

This chicks a real champ 😂

[@podcastforhumanity955]

goddam Bill Burr is fucking hilarious most slept on comic out there

[@sarah54471]

I fuccking love bill burr

[@justtalk5970]

3:53 "UUULLGGGHHHHH" 😂😂

[@vinterskog]

Why didn't Bill address the fact that he went down on her AFTER he was finished? Am I the only one to shiver at the thought here?

[@radseven89]

+Khogn TM He probably used a condom.

[@vinterskog]

I hope so! :)

[@saintmaster22]

+Khogn TM never kissed a girl after she blew you mate? i don't recall ever cumming and then going down, but i dont see the terrible thing about it

[@vinterskog]

:C

[@radseven89]

saintmaster22

[@1mannyman1]

damn, this is the funniest podcast clip ever!??

[@SuperFilmregisseur]

The whole time I imagined Michael McCrudden!😂

[@GearsDemon]

lmao this is hilarious.

[@OnaPayPhone]

This was hilarious.

[@RichardTuckman]

It doesn't hurt to teach your partner what you like and don't like. Guide your mate to do things that you like and how you like it. Once they realize how much you enjoy certain things and you start reacting positively, it will in turn boost them up and both of you will be pleased. It can be a part of foreplay! Otherwise you just catch and release a dude who doesn't know what they're doing and they continue to spread it around.

[@warlock253]

the hailmary!! loooooooollll

[@Tatti12321]

Three minutes in and I'm tapping out. Can't listen.

[@ristonalaimo5048]

i made it to four and a half but i was losing it at 3 hahaha very funny

[@strangemanmtd8350]

Minute man.

[@nicholasrios5622]

Lol communication is key. she should just tell him the truth and boost he eagle how she wants to have a great sex life with him, then get into to detail how she like and practice with him alot! he'll be happy and with in time get better. if she doesn't like then just move on.

[@matthewlong2667]

Balls stuck in his zipper? Hahaha smoooooth

[@ir1041]

If you do like him then teach him. Gotta learn somewhere

[@joseph4043]

This guy is ron Jeremy

[@floorman12]

"The Money Pit"

[@kaseyadamsky6344]

yea!

[@yungl0s303]

He never censors the info out lol

[@niceguyslol3667]

Omg I can't stop laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 my stomach hurts. So fucking funny, sorry for her and him but so funny lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@darksideofearth1]

I'll save you the trouble....this is hilarious.

[@markvickroy6725]

Was he doing them at the same time or was he alternating with each hand? I'm dying

[@spencerludman3915]

Anyone hum the chicken dance while bill is reading what this guy does?

[@MrKarlSync]

This is hilarious.

[@keirasorrells319]

Bill said women are amazing 😯😂💜 6:51

[@Joseph-wc6qd]

Is this guy Lenny from “Of Mice & Men”?

[@DrNaCl]

Was this about me...?

[@patrickmurray2786]

I live in Bills hometown too in canton

[@maineman5555]

Oh Man, this is just to good, I thought it was going to end with, when he finally let me out of the closet or smile, you're on candid camera.

[@NocriZle]

I feel so bad for her lol

[@garibaldi54]

3:53

[@MMLauritsen]

This story lives rent free in my head. I sometimes get the urge to honk breasts like this guy, but I feel like the girl has to be in on the inside joke first lol.

[@blarghhboy]

I love how Bill says "titties" hahaaha. I don't know why but I do.

[@almightykronocs2099]

How do I send him emails?

[@connormclaughlin6079]

I’m fuckin dead @ the draft pick

[@tomfrankiewicz7951]

Maybe he played highschool and college too with no helmet. LOL

[@nt1331tn]

I made the same exact noise bill made after the on top part

[@justinbrutcher1579]

Bill says he feels bad for the dude. I feel bad for her!

[@anonymoussethian1323]

Just tell him what you like! And how to do it.

[@LlibertarianGalt]

Any women in this situation, pro tip: Next time you're getting intimate take control, tell them what you like and they will do it. If he's not open to suggestions during the session then move on, if he is then you can probably help him do everything you like and rock your world. Needs patience though.

[@zaccanada519]

Hahahaha stumped

[@Brevspread]

Start chipping away at the mountain. That's a hilarious way of critiquing inexperience although it sounds to me the reasonable answer. I think all workshops work that way, right?

[@floorman12]

lmao

[@kev3d]

I can sort of understand nuzzling against her bust. A lot of women smell nice and the soft skin feels nice against the cheeks. But nosing around like a curious dog seems a bit much, and the squeezing is just out of control. Poor dude. If he wasn't a virgin, he was never taught correctly.

[@nardinit]

+Yow Za Sure, but the e-mail said he was using his nose...that, you have to admit, is pretty weird.

[@MorteSeoinage]

Bill changed.

[@WD-hd1vw]

I just coughed up a long on the nuts in the zippernpart. caught me mid rip.

[@caspermilquetoast5924]

LMAO

[@rodbelding9523]

I feel bad for this guy, he's very obviously a shy anxious person who didn't know what he was doing. Honestly though credit to the girl for giving the guy a chance, that's a win for shy guys everywhere.