ENNEAGRAM Type 5 | Annoying Things Fives Do in Romantic Relationships

[@AbbeyHowe]

MORE videos about wonderful 5s: bit.ly/Enneagram5s

[@allthingsglam8545]

Us type 5’s hate small talk. The video starts at 3:05😂

[@CoachAhava-0000]

Love the effort and fun that created this video. . Greatly appreciate this comment 😘

[@ififfingiffingifs]

And unless it's exposure therapy day, skip 7:59-8:24!

[@dnkmnk]

THANKS

[@divyabharti.]

Tx

[@blaqbutterfly90]

OMG THANK YOU😅

[@whimmyblue5734]

As a meteorology student Type 5, small talk about the weather turns into an info dump session about meteorological processes. Only bit of small talk I like.

[@lydia6477]

outstanding move. Frankly glorious, as a five myself im shaking

[@whimmyblue5734]

@@lydia6477 Thank you, Mr. Aizawa

[@biomeman2547]

As a Five, I dislike small talk completely. It doesn't make sense

[@andyroobrick-a-brack9355]

Same here lol.

[@badpoetry33]

oooh neat! you are the only kind of person I’d like to discuss the weather with!

[@bone_apple_teeth457]

My grandpa is totally a type 5. He’s spent his whole life hoarding books and tries to know everything about everything. He’s extremely self-educated and skilful.

[@snoopyontheground3481]

Did you ever get an emotional welcome from your grandpa or was he a selfish prick to everyone in the family?

[@mrmoe110]

Lmao it’s the norm for me to leave the library with a stack of books, even though I have tons of books at home already that I haven’t read yet

[@laurenbarber8579]

The hiding in the closet bit isn’t overdramatic... In college, my closet is where I got alone time from my roommates, they got used to it

[@peterspilltheteaparker4109]

I agree I’ve done this too hiding in my closet because I wasn’t looking good. And didn’t want to face people 🙈😅

[@袖時雨桜花-h5y]

yes, yes, and YES! when i was young i used to went into my parents closet or the toilet when ever my mom was being aggressive because she always gets overly mad at me (she has anger management issues) so i could hide away from everything, recharge, and wait until all the chaos she could cause around me would get at least milder than before (i didn't had my own room when i was young).

[@gracieliz95]

Yup, I’m a 5 and I love hiding in closets

[@veyarain82]

Me, already plotting my college dorm space with a curtained-off area under my bed so I have a cave to hide in if necessary ^^;

[@Bongi344]

Me, toilet. Still. I'm 30 😂

[@gksurabhi]

Enneagram 5 & introverts are not necessarily always about book lovers & hoarding books, contrary to the popular stereotypes. Esply when one has access to high speed internet, research n scholarly articles online & smartphones in their hands all the time. Modern day introverts are more about 20-30 open tabs to explore on a single subject, instead of one loooongg perspective in each book

[@francesca.pellegrino]

As a kid, I was ALWAYS hiding in cabinets, so I totally laughed hard at the spiders being named.

[@AbbeyHowe]

yessss 😂 amazing

[@alexrose20]

i would hide in cabinets too but you would never catch me counting spiders i would die 💀

[@alexrose20]

small talk is accurate after two sentences and nothing sparked my interest I'm gone my mind is elsewhere

[@maedchenausmars]

My husband can’t stand how I struggle to listen or take time to talk to him. Sometimes I’m really trying, but I just check out.

[@AbbeyHowe]

ugh small talk is so hard

[@gracekelly2063]

That is so true. If my interest isn’t sparked quickly my mind just wanders elsewhere and I usually just either sit there and be in my head or I’ll change the topic to something more interesting and deeper.

[@darwinwatterson4568]

as a seven, i get bored by small talk (and also i would probably feel ingenuine)

[@idiasweet8191]

LITERALLY!

[@alexrose20]

when she pulled out the relationship chart i died

[@AbbeyHowe]

I had so much fun making it 😂

[@mwatson4970]

I was literally thinking of making a relationship chart laying down the interests and plus/negatives of the guys I'm quarantine dating not 3 hrs ago. Anal maybe; helpful, "YES" (says any Type 5, ever 😁).

[@EveInTheMachine]

Same. Although I will say that my chart will also have a giant section for my intuitive analysis of their "energy" and observation of their body language for their authenticity and truthfulness. And also a section of our potential for fantastically romantic and charming shared experiences in both peaceful and magnificent settings. *coughs* I have a very high 4-wing.

[@sumayagure8422]

i was planing on marrying a guy because we had the same ideals and a great friendship.....their was no love and I really thought yhhh but loves fades anyways so its perfect😂😂😂😂😂

[@gReencAt4754]

You lied about your death

[@mattcalloway8775]

the blanket over the head bit at the beginning is frighteningly accurate😂

[@AbbeyHowe]

hehehe

[@saloni.sharma]

I am 26 and been doing it for years now. My family knows it and my mum calls me the living pyramid when I'm like that. 😂😂😂😂

[@finallyfree2BMe]

Exactly

[@kbbooks2895]

I definitely do the “information hoarding” thing and it drives my (type 6) husband crazy. I think I do it for one of two reasons. 1) I don’t want to be judged by what I’m looking at. Like, maybe I clicked an article on a whim and I don’t want the other person to think it’s something I’m deeply interested or invested in. Or 2) I haven’t had time to process yet. Ask me about it later and I’ll probably obnoxiously talk your ear off about the subject, but while I’m still reading/watching it? I don’t know what I think about it yet! Either that or I’m embarrassed that I spent a whole afternoon watching Enneagram and MBTI videos instead of working on that project I complain that I never have time to work on…

[@lishayost44]

I think I wrote your comment, KB, lol!

[@soccerchamp0511]

OMG! Exactly! I never realized this is why I do this.

[@nakimushi3881]

I didn’t realize this was something I did until I realized I started playing a new game I was excited to delve deeply into and enjoy and work it out myself and my friend saw that I was playing it and promptly proceeded to ask me about it, buy it, and play it himself. Needless to say I was very upset and abandoned the game because it was no longer something for myself that I didn’t have to share. It felt like my personal space got intruded on

[@CoachAhava-0000]

Interesting. I'll hoard info this way. I also will give my opinion based on what I know while still processing to safe people, they know that my opinion will likely change. They also know that their feedback about my opinion becomes data to consider while I continue processing.

[@werethespecialz]

dayum so accurate

[@EveInTheMachine]

As a 5w4, I can confirm that the analogy of the turtle and the tasty leaf is 1000% accurate! xD Also, it's funny - I usually don't feel attacked when I watch videos on my type - more often than not I actually love them - but maybe that's just my high 4-wing coming through who desperately wants to be heard and seen, lol. Oh, and I'm happy you talked about the rejection sensitivity that 5's have. I feel like that doesn't get talked about enough whenever people talk about 5's.

[@troutie2008]

Yup. Me too.

[@e.l.2734]

Lol same. My poor 4-wing is so deprived of its needs that it's actually comforting to relate to something this much

[@JH-yj7kk]

The move to 7 is weird and real, and feels like a manic state. Last time it happened to me I was shouting "I'M A GENIUS! I SHOULD DO A PODCAST!". Sorry to my friends.

[@AbbeyHowe]

you SHOULD start a podcast! 😂

[@myrtila]

Ikr? Last time i went on “7 mode”, i was considering starting my own business while also studying for my degree

[@Mo-is9ko]

@@myrtila I am doing exactly this right now and I am not even a 5. But I am fascinated by them. I am 8w9 and always found 5 to be the kind I'd really really want to be friends with. But I think I push them away. :(

[@joiedevivre894]

@@Mo-is9ko lol as a five it’s the emotion for us. Anyone coming across as too clingy is immediately a no from us. Not trying to be rude we just like our space so just being chill is the best way to catch our attention until we seek you out

[@davidlincolnbrooks]

I think when the Five goes to Seven, usually....um.... "substances" are involved. Just sayin'.

[@thobekakunene]

I'm a type 5 and I feel so very understood, it's scary...😂😂😂🤭🤭🤭 Nah...for real. Especially with the rejection thing. Everytime I've felt rejected and abandoned by my people, I've done some OTT things to cope: taught myself how to juggle, learned a new language, read a big book...in addition to self isolation. And what's sad is that when I feel better (or have calmed down) my crazy passions often fall away as quickly as they came...

[@finallyfree2BMe]

Me too

[@drekathigpen4869]

@@finallyfree2BMeI started an online tutoring service once when I was super stressed about resources. But then I got a new job and started getting irritated that ppl were sending email inquiries on the site 😂

[@thescapegoatmechanism8704]

“The sole cause of man’s unhappiness is that he does not know how to stay quietly in his room.” -Blaise Pascal

[@AbbeyHowe]

Love this!

[@thescapegoatmechanism8704]

@@AbbeyHowe oh yes, he’s my favorite 5

[@laurenbarber8579]

This reminds me of the song “I am a rock” by Simon and Garfunkel, I think it depicts a five pretty well, especially a self-pres five

[@1jediwitch]

“It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.” ~Bilbo Baggjns.

[@hugh_f]

Abbey, such a kind hearted critique. Removing the physical, you've summarised how this type may approach all relationships. By being oblique, you've created such warmth in this type summary. Insightful and entertaining.

[@AbbeyHowe]

Thank you for this assessment, Hugh! Really appreciate it. ♥️

[@jldavis8591]

As a type 5 with a type 2 girlfriend and a type 7 best friend, I can definitely confirm the alone time segment. Like it's 100% accurate.

[@AbbeyHowe]

yep!!

[@snoopyontheground3481]

As a 5, are you still with the 2 girl friend - 5s and 2s are the worst match - correct in your experience???

[@sylviaowega3839]

Ha ha! I know the feeling with my type 1. You must also be an INTP, right?

[@rebeccahorne9487]

Where did you get my relationship risk analysis chart?!

[@AbbeyHowe]

hehehee borrowed it for a few days!!

[@retrovintagedreams]

As a type 5 I feel personally attacked in a funny way and way too seen.. which weirds me out but I loved this video!

[@_purplewinter_]

The move to 7 might sound weird to other people but always made sense to me since I learned about the enneagram. Like, 100% sense.

[@rebeccahorne9487]

Yep. I want to know and do all the things so I won't be caught off guard if Something Bad happens. If I'm stressed and feel like the Something Bad is imminent, that means I need to quick learn everything about everything, right now.

[@AbbeyHowe]

thanks for sharing, Erika! 💕

[@mwatson4970]

100% agree. But also say that we KNOW when we are in that space, and it annoys us when we can't just tell ourselves to get out of it. Like our brains/logic are failing us.

[@saloni.sharma]

@@mwatson4970 this is exactly what makes it a disintegration path. We hate to do it but compulsively do it anyway. Makes sense to me as well, mostly for the reasons mentioned in this thread but also because it distracts me from things i lack because i focus on things that i can easily master in less time, no matter how insignificant. Sucks to be a 7 for us. 😐

[@angelymmartinez3845]

I'm a type 9 dating a type 5 and I actually find some of these things adorable.

[@christybaldwin8666]

I’ve been married to a 5 for 14 years and this is sooooo accurate 🤣💕 especially that 2 and 5 scene... that is us all the time 🙈

[@AbbeyHowe]

hehehehe that's really cute. congrats on your marriage!!

[@snoopyontheground3481]

Sorry to hear you are married to a 5.

[@angelocarantino4803]

@@snoopyontheground3481 hey we aren't that bad :(

[@sylviaowega3839]

@@snoopyontheground3481Are we that bad?

[@snoopyontheground3481]

@@sylviaowega3839 --- you would have to ask the individuals in your inner circle what its like relating to you - if you have the courage to ask honestly.

[@marishaten7399]

Great video Abbey! Thank you so much for putting this together. It is a very in-depth take on Enneagram 5s. Some of the ways I identified with it as a 5: 1. My mother is a Type 2, and the Type 5 - Type 2 interaction is spot on! Having grown up with a Type 2 mother has helped me become more aware of the emotional needs of other people as well. 2. I love hoarding information. I love surprising people with my stack of (useless) trivia, and I hate to mention my sources. 3. When I am under stress (probably when I go to 7) I feel an excess of energy. I usually take a walk or exercise or clean the house during those times, to work off the stress. 4. I hate for my needs and wants to be a burden on other people. In a group I never suggest watching my favourite movie or going to my favourite restaurant for fear of boring/disappointing others. I prefer to do my favourite things when I am all by myself. It really brings tears to my eyes to see another person (you) understand my feelings so well. I want to make a request - would you consider making a video on how each Enneagram type changes when they move along their paths of integration? Like when 5 moves to 8 etc? Or have you already made it and I missed it?

[@Crocsvevo]

My partner is a Five and I’m sending him this video to see if he thinks it’s accurate😂 I think that one of the most endearing but also extremely annoying things my partner does (besides immediately isolating himself at the first sign of any kind of confrontation) is that he’s so incredibly helpful like he literally is always trying to help HOWEVER sometimes the way he says or does things comes across so wacky. For example, he knows I have trouble finding motivation to do my nighttime skincare routine and like maybe a month ago I had put on like a full beat and we were just hanging out and out of nowhere he was like “you should go wash your face.” And like logically I knew he was just trying to be helpful but the fact that it was like 5pm when he said it made me so self conscious about the makeup I was wearing lmao

[@lebabies]

Relatable 😂

[@saloni.sharma]

We're sorry... 😅 I randomly remind my partner to take vitamins and drink water out of nowhere too😂😂😂 He used to think it's weird but now he's okay with it. 😅

[@madman7923]

So ... i barely learned about enneagrams tonight and that im a type 5w6 and everything you said was pretty accurate. my mom thought i was a robot growing up because i would shut down emotionally and always withdraw. i found solace in computers and the massive amount of information you can learn from there. I'm sorta glad to know there are other people like me too... i just wish i were more extroverted sometimes. anyway, thanks for the funny videos!

[@DariusLong]

I love how you turned it into a commercial for skillshare, that was both clever and legit hilarious. I signed up too. Great video as always Abbey👍

[@AbbeyHowe]

Thanks Darius! We had so much fun filming that. 😜

[@seforaker]

Accurate. Especially the rejection part and hiding from fights because I thought I heard a tone in their voice lol

[@mrswhite645]

So, as I told my now-husband during our first relationship status conversation... "When I close my eyes, I see you and me, not you, me, and 3 or 4 other chicks". I also told him I was not expecting an answer in that conversation and that he should take a couple of weeks to think. LOL! This video know about me.

[@AbbeyHowe]

what a fantastic way to do a DTR!!!

[@mrswhite645]

@@AbbeyHowe he says he had never heard anything remotely like that before and was hooked. I'm glad but, I was terrified and just couldn't take being the "cool girl" again so, I did the opposite.

[@rebeccahorne9487]

I really like this one. You've gotten a lot more nuanced in how you portray 5's--I like that you capture the emotional and genuinely romantic sides of the type. Now that I think about it, portrayals of 5's usually hit on the mental and socially awkward sides for obvious reasons, but I don't think I often see portrayals of the emotional depth aspect. There's an interesting moment in The Village that really resonated me, where the shy, stuttery character tells the girl he loves, "The only time I feel fear as others do is when I picture you in danger."

[@AbbeyHowe]

Thanks Rebecca! I definitely think I’ve grown in my understanding since last year. Appreciate your feedback!

[@wh4tevercomest0mind41]

This is oddly accurate....I am now going to collect data on every other type of enneagram, memorize an enneagram test then proceed to ask said test questions to anyone I encounter of the opposite sex to protect myself from those in which I am incompatible with. Good day to you madam.

[@dutchkel]

lolol I also feel the need to do this.

[@Sage03]

Am I the only 5 that doesn’t mind small talk? I’ve become an expert at it since I’ve been able to steer conversations into being more superficial so I never have to share emotions or pieces of info to make me feel vulnerable.

[@baileyfilms7609]

Your wing is probably an empathetic or pleaser type

[@caffemocca8855]

I can handle small talk with people I like. Random people? Now way unless it's job related. Also, even my small talk are intense, I'd totally go deep into psychology, social constructs, why things/reality are the way they are, should certain things be changed, etc.. Then again it's not "small" talk anymore..... I don't know those things are enneagram related or because of my MBTI type. Maybe both, which increases the alienation even more.

[@MaioFourpaws]

yes.

[@ayp5177]

this is me as a 7

[@BombshElle_7]

Small talk is a skill that many of your type refuse to learn. More power to you for breaking the mold

[@ShaunBennetFauntleroy]

What a lovely blend of compassion and humor! The hoarding the new magazines/books is on the nose. I'm so guilty of that.

[@jessalbright976]

"time to organize the hallway closet!" I'm dying 😂😂👏👏

[@ShaeIvie]

I'm a 5 😂😂😂 this video sees me.

[@AbbeyHowe]

so glad!!

[@blakelysmith7636]

Newton, Euclid, and Bob are my best friends.

[@AbbeyHowe]

Hehehhehe 🕷

[@enfieldjohn101]

Very accurate. Funny, but spot on. One of my many interests is gardening and I have a bachelor of science degree in botany, so the last skit was especially familiar to me. I can't help but study things in minute detail, especially if they interest me. About the closest I get to making small talk that I actually enjoy is by sharing fun facts about subjects I know a lot about. Mention that you have a plant at home and I'll want to know all about it. Odds are, I'll have ideas for caring for it that you haven't thought of yet too. Good video!

[@henrikralf1582]

"also you are cute and like Star Wars" as a 5 and a big Star Wars fan I would totally say that :D

[@VeronicaLL]

That's me

[@AbbeyHowe]

Mandaloriannnnnn

[@henrikralf1582]

@@AbbeyHowe Oh yes, great show and great second season!

[@henrikralf1582]

5s often have a very specific topic, they're interested in, but it doesn't need to be scientific. And Star Wars is very interesting and also more than action in space, there are many books, comics, games etc. with grate stories and fascinating topics.

[@themysticalbadass]

Yup. Accurate. It took me nearly a decade of being with my soulmate to stop feeling like any moment he would leave. …and I’m 98% sure my son is a 2. 😭😂 Because THAT was on point!

[@Finding_Your_Way-z9y]

Im a 5 and i dont mind small talk. I think small talk is very interesting way to learn about people and things. So i ilike small talk.

[@soccerchamp0511]

This is very accurate! I'm a 5 and have done all of the above. The thing with "shifting" to type 7 I question, though, because I don't think I'm being manic at all. Because of wanting to learn as much about the world as possible and being voraciously curious, I genuinely have a broad range of hobbies and interests and have my whole life. I was literally the kid in high school who had friends in pretty much every clique because I was involved in everything. I was the history geek artist who played soccer, rode horses, sang in a band, coached, and was in Drama Club, Toastmasters, and MUSS. I love exploring and one of my mottoes in life is that I'll pretty much try anything once. I guess my point is that one of the ways I love learning more about the world is through experiences, so that makes me identify strongly with 7s.

[@Smidgenhead]

Lol I’m a 2 and hubby’s a 5. I make waffles for him all the time! 😅 Like, please come hang out with me!!

[@AbbeyHowe]

waffles are the most romantic

[@debmarrett212]

And when you ask them if the waffles tastes good, you get a lukewarm answer. Haha

[@apgar2]

I never comment but the skit in number 3 had me CACKLING. I am that Type 2 girlfriend, I cannot bear to be not included 😂

[@AbbeyHowe]

Thanks for commenting!!!

[@viiravos]

bro this is so accurate wtf lmao. i literally hid under my bed when i was a kid and sharing a room, and then hid in the closet when i needed to get away and i was sharing a room with a friend lmao

[@larrycheek3588]

The best tip: make sure to give the type five the most space to form their sentences. They must form them perfectly hence they may pause longer.

[@purplemind93]

Abbey, this is one of the best 5 videos you've done! Thank you! The isolation and the weighing of pros and cons before entering relationship felt right on the money! Besides being funny, it made me more sure that I am in fact a 5. (but 4w5 is still open for consideration, one must speculate until all the facts are in^^).

[@AbbeyHowe]

Thank you so much! This means a lot to me. 😊

[@gideonebeling]

As a type 5, I was skeptic at first that this would just be another stereotypical basic white girl/self-proclaimed enneagram expert putting my type into a box, but I was wrong. This was a great video and you nailed so many things right on the head. The rejection one at the end is so so true.

[@sylviaowega3839]

Well … being a type 5 transcends all race, culture and ethnic backgrounds.

[@ainelael]

The scene where the 2 is intruding on the 5's recharge time could not have been more accurate. I feel like that with everyone. Boundary setting is a struggle.

[@HighFiveFriend]

Appreciate and compliment our strengths. There's lots to love about us... Fives are AWESOME!!!

[@maryprice8458]

Hehehe you guys are awesome 😎

[@AbbeyHowe]

they truly are!! (love your username!)

[@vero1697]

you’re really hitting the nail on the head - the first one took me by surprise as i didn’t know others were reluctant to share like me! for some inexplicable reason, i feel almost ambushed when people ask about what i’m doing and i just clam up and say nothing! i also absolutely love that you’re not just featuring heterosexual relationships, it’s a small thing but it means a lot. 💞

[@jpfitness2242]

I'm a 5w4 INFP. Let me tell you what my biggest frustration is. I feel like there's so much going on in my head and I need the freedom to explore thoughts as they come to me. Any external stimuli like other people around me, barking dogs or something boring that requires my focus pulls me out of my head which feels very uncomfortable. It would be like being snatched out of your own house in the freezing cold and not being allowed back inside.

[@suburbohemian]

being type 5 = 'territorial' and I'm happy to share my magazine/catalog provided I get first flip-through cus it's mine (my sister used to take my stuff all the time ARGH) and provided you return it in as good condition as I lent it.

[@suburbohemian]

as for my time, well, one of the benefits of also being INTJ-A is knowing how to plan for both doing stuff for others and saving time for recharging.

[@keddy5627]

I am a 5, and this described me perfectly. I am now aware when I engage in several different things at once that I am not addressing a fear or an anxiety about something. 🥰

[@concrete_dog]

People trying to have small talk with me all the time is why I often avoid social interactions...

[@creativeraven2222]

#6 had me laughing out loud. Spot on. Every time I move I have to let go of books. That 11 boxes one time almost had me crying. Then I remembered....the internet, and I could re-buy them later.

[@KitKatnotthecandylol]

That 5-2 interaction....is me and my sister EVERYDAY 😭😭😂

[@enimagial8721]

in 10th grade, I made a power point presentation about my relationship, and I forgot to close it before an exam, and then my teacher had to help me because the Maths Programme didn't work, and he turned off my laptop and then the power point became visible and I still sometimes think about it

[@bbydollt]

I don’t tell my husband my secrets because then he tells everyone else without ever going through me!! 😤 it’s weird but I’m so glad you addressed this 🤣😂

[@vloveg80]

That may be the first time I’ve heard the manic 7 bit, but it rang so true! And YES! We need alone space! I spent 2 weeks at a friends’ house and was so homesick for my empty apartment!

[@AbbeyHowe]

ooh an empty apartment is wonderful!

[@haileydavis606]

NUMBER 6 literally me at the moment. Scary accurate I was literally trying to figure out if I was a 5 or 7 and this makes so much sense

[@Meg_intheclouds]

I’m a 6w7 with a type 5w6 partner. It’s an interesting combo of them needing space and me needing reassurance and more closeness (because my worst fear is abandonment). Recently I’ve Been feeling more anxious as at first they were a lot more clingy like I was, but now they need more space I don’t want to smother them but I also need that reassurance that they’re going to come back and still need me and want to be with me, it’s about finding the balance. Typology defiantly helps though, also open communication is very key for me, but I know it’s something they struggle with. I’m also an ENFP so I have that Fi need to be as open and authentic as possible in order to feel content and safe and secure in a relationship (while at the same time being scared of Being vulnerable at times at least with showing hurt)

[@bbjudyfit]

This was insightful. My soon to be hubby is an enfp and I'm an 5w6 , so I'm just curious what your partners mbti is.

[@lowkeyotaku2373]

This data has proven itself worthy of being digested and used to go over my last/first relationship to compare where I went wrong, also, a new subscriber.

[@AbbeyHowe]

The first 1000 people to use the link will get a free trial of Skillshare Premium Membership: skl.sh/abbeyhowe12201

[@alexistokarska9541]

Ok, at first I thought: naaah, hating small talk? Naaah. And then it hit me. I REALLY HATE SMALL TALK

[@hannahgilbert437]

I actually love your lighting in this video!

[@AbbeyHowe]

thanks Hannah 😳

[@saloni.sharma]

BULLSEYE Abby!!! First of all i had to pause after intro to laugh because i felt called out already 😂😂😂 Secondly, thank you for putting this together nicely. I hate stereotyping people because i find it limiting but somehow can't deny that i do all of the things you mentioned. Shared it with my partner for extra fun and i feel seen now. 😂😂

[@melissaclair1508]

From a type 5, Udemy has a bunch of classes on so many different things as well. You can get a subscription of pay for each course and keep the courses forever. The courses are as low as 13.99, which I think is a great price.

[@alexrose20]

rejection sensitivity combined from autism and childhood trauma 👁️👄👁️

[@hanagabriellebidon9330]

Add ADHD and you got me.

[@alexrose20]

@@hanagabriellebidon9330 lol i have that too

[@jakestephens3751]

I've never lived alone. So for years I've gone out to my car and sat in it for hours just to have some me time 🤣 everyone always asks if I'm OK lmao.

[@mackenziegohdes7963]

I’m a 2 married to a 5....we balance each other out...most of the time 😂 and this video is deeply relatable 😜

[@freyeik]

I literally fell out of my chair once listening to someone like that. They of course and predictablely said that I knew they were going to say and said "Are you alright?" And I responded with "Just listening and thinking about how to make this dynamic gift of sharing ideas we are currently undergoing in this transaction of knowledge we are sharing with each other. And the act of falling on the floor now gives us a sense of closer connection as we feel ourselves care about each other through this vulnerability I am undergoing whether it is conscious or not. What about you?"

[@lebabies]

Bahahahaha, my husband is a 5, I am a 7. This is...familiar 😂 (OMG, I sent him the video, he has it on, but he is also working two hours early on a problem at his job simultaneously, muttering to himself as he solves the problem 😬)

[@logannelson48]

Although I think this video is pretty spot on, I think you should so a video on subtypes for 5s and maybe other types too. Subtypes especially for a 5 can set one apart from the other. I partly know I am a 5 because I searched for days trying to find out if I was a 7 or a 5 because I was a lot more social than people were making 5s out to be. Me being a so/sx 5, I am an extrovert and love social interaction but also many times fear it.

[@jackieli772]

"Newton, Euclid, and Bob" x-D Almost exactly what I would name them. I might substitute Euclid for Einstein or Nikola (Tesla). I hope they were consulted in the relationship analysis chart.

[@sylviaowega3839]

Yes, I’m a 5w4 and always hated small take. Even my owner partner whom is a 1w9 would sometime say in announce, “Can’t you just make a little small talk!?”

[@lifeisbeautiful7047]

Everything is accurate except that after I matured I made peace with small talks

[@ToBeALegacy]

Wow the part on jumping from 5 to 7 and being manic. Too accurate

[@florentcouturier7465]

LOL ! I'm a 5 and to benchmark my relationship is very familiar. I didn't tought about the blackboard ... But very good idea 😅😂 !

[@sneakerspeakerdiva]

i'm going to send this to my spouse and tell him he's the tastiest leaf in the jungle

[@AbbeyHowe]

ONE HUNDRED PERCENT

[@spectrefang8309]

As a type 5...this is point blank accurate. My gawd XD

[@BombshElle_7]

I am a Type 8 INTJ. A lot of ppl of the same MBTI type are 5s, so I wanted to see if there were any similarities between us. This video did not disappoint! Like a 5, I need my alone time, I will isolate to avoid conflict ONLY w/ those I'm very close to (everyone else can catch these hands 🥊🥊). And fnally, when interested in someone, I will deeply assess the pros, cons, long term effects, and feasibility of a relationship with them, just like a Type 5. But I don't share their core fears at all. That's how I know I'm not a 5, but I think I'd get along well with them. 🙂

[@UnleashedEducation]

Hey! I'm an INTJ Type 5. My husband is an 8 and we are similar in a lot of ways, but very different in others. - Charlotte

[@BombshElle_7]

@@UnleashedEducation That’s awesome!! Your response has made my night. Thank you 😊

[@parfiteleporter]

Am I even 5? I mean, the test said I am. But these descriptions fit me half way. I mean, yes, I THINK A LOT. AND AM ALWAYS THINKING, REASEARCHING, KNOWING, LEARNING ... but it's mostly about the undiscovered areas of the world than the invented/discovered knowledge. I'm up for intelligent session sure, philosophical sure, but a nerdy debate about the ALREADY INVENTED stuff is not my highest priority. I love abstract ideas and to find a logical way to support them, I love knowing what we are not taught or what the world doesn't know already, it might not help me in practical life, but it simulates me intellectually. I would rather think of how, why, than when and where. Is it just me? To be precise, I want to know all the secrets of the world, like ALL. It bothers me how much government, army, or any other organizations know more than I as a regular patron ever can. I guess I should stop right here, you'd even think am blabbering at this point. Edit - No. I am not daydreamer, at least not the way you think I am. I just love to be the one "that has just discovered something or was the first to say "I knew this, than anyone before".

[@amandawilson8212]

I’m a 7; my partner is a 5. I want to show him this so badly just because it’s lighthearted and a fun way to talk about challenges. But the thought of all of the questions and analysis it will cause already has me tired of thinking. I think this means we are both accurately enneagram typed! 🤣

[@AbbeyHowe]

Oh gosh but it might be worth it!

[@AMoniqueOcampo]

One of the characters in my novel is a Type 5 and since I have a 5 wing, this is just my two cents. My character doesn't like to reveal information that she regards as too personal. She kills at movie trivia games, but she didn't really talk about what she wants for her birthday, for example. Any Type 5s relate?

[@Mauripsu]

What is their MBTI? Her wing? Also she's relatable from what you said, at least to me

[@_purplewinter_]

As a 5, for me this happens and for two reasons. 1º Because I naturally have a hard time explaining anything, my mind is quicker than my mouth and I make a mess, crossing words and sounding super awckward. 2º (And the sad reason) because, specially when I was younger, I suffered a lot from getting rejection about things that I loved when sharing them with people, that made me want to keep it all to myself.

[@annab6632]

I'm a 5, and although I can't say this for certain, I'd say a big part of this is a sense of protectiveness over information. Personal information and values tend to be so well protected because it's the one form of information that a 5 has complete control over. As well, because information is power, a 5 feels that if they reveal personal information they are giving the other person power over them. I'm not especially well versed in the enneagram, but from personal experience when I am healthy I will be much more open and vulnerable with people, even those who I haven't known for very long (although they will still have to hit some level of trustworthiness in my head.)

[@leogrrrl5876]

@@_purplewinter_ I've usually found that I don't relate to the part about 5s hoarding knowledge & information, but what you just said fits. (Thanks for the different perspective!) I would also add that others can find my info too complex &/or lack the patience to listen. They might not find it useful or relevant, & merely want to jump into action without slowing down to consider the big picture & the different facts/components first.

[@AMoniqueOcampo]

@@Mauripsu She's 5w6 more often than not and she's INTP.

[@jenica5334]

I kid you not, point 2 was a reenactment of what had happened to me in a relationship with a type 5 LOOOOL

[@margaretjudice8944]

This was a great video. My son is a 5 and I am a 2 and the scene you had on point 3 was exactly what happens when hes in his room at home reading and I open the door to offer him food or snacks. I was a vocal music education major in college and I sing when I do anything around the house. I laughed. Thank you for sharing.

[@margaretjudice8944]

I rewatched this. My son retested since my last comment. He's a 1. We had thought he was 5, then 8, settled on 1. Great video!

[@bleedjuliet]

i’m so happy i found your channel

[@nancydavidson7306]

As a young girl I used to sit in a closet for the quiet sense of boundaries

[@isaiahthompson6751]

As a type 5, I can attest to the hatred of small talk, it drives those around me crazy.... love the videos, keep up the good work!

[@LordCaes]

This is incredible. Thank you!

[@sansypansy4999]

great video Abbey, really resonated and made me laugh too. thankyou. xx

[@emptyness7]

Type 5 here: sometimes I learn so much about interpersonal relationships but can't really communicate assertively or put all that knowledge in practice/ apply it to real life.

[@iamthisiam]

... Hello 👋🏿 5 here. I've considered the validity to Enneagrams for a few months now. It checks out. Just as well, I've sensed this ancient avatar system we can life may be a combo of: enneagrams, zodiacs, temperament, and archetypes. One day, it may be useful to acknowledge some all encumbering system... (Clearly I'm a 5) Also, I answered these as though they could help you understand is a bit. Again, with enneagrams, zodiacs, temperament, and archetypes potentially playing a role, there is no way to generalize this perspective. Enjoy. 1. Sharing: I want to share with you but: [a] I know a lot. More so, I know little about a lot of things; blame it on my unofficial diagnoses of ADHD - so I chose to believe. [b] You may not care. I want you to. I want more than for you to want to, I want you to respond with carefully considered thoughts with a passion both foreign yet familiar. [c] You may not use the info, but return to me with the desire to vent about the same issue I advised you on days, weeks, months, or even years ago. 2. Vulnerability: I don't always remember what it's like to feel, but when it happens, it's like an orgasm. Big, passionate, intimate, and museful. You can't have this side of me. I've been watching and listening to you. You sound chaotic, self centered, and too sensitive to handle the way my being wishes to speak. Smh my being. I am spiritually inclined to leave you all here and float in space where I can forget to breathe ... In peace. 3. Recharging: I like you, I really do. But honestly, transparency, right? I wish you all would get your shit together so I didn't have to think more about how I would save the world or worry about you all arguing and burning the world down outside my door; and, instead, cater more time to naming bugs. Like buddy the butterfly. He's yellow. 4. Small Talk: Type 5 hates small talk. 5. Defense: Isolation is for me and you. I don't want to hurt you, for several reasons; as you've may have considered, I've thought about them several times before we spoke; or maybe you haven't considered. You're small talk about issues you refuse to slow down and reconsider annoys me. I don't want to hear you vent or carry on about aimlessly topics... But in a coffee shop, when I don't have to join in with strangers... I listen. I guess, just small talk... Over there somewhere. Ha. 6. Mania: As a boy, I wanted to be a fireman, policeman, a spaceman (like buzz), and batman! I want to be all the things I see, study, and like. Just not enough time in a day or life to do so... So I became a philosopher. At least here I can study why I feel this way and why you feel that way; and maybe, I find my match and she can help me organize my mind to complete these goals; because I was going to help her anyway. 7. Relationships: I love you. I discovered how to do it his 5 years ago when I had finally noticed I should love myself. It hadn't crossed my mind. Please don't think this meant I hated my self, I hadn't considered either direction. I thought once maybe I'd like be with a five, but I don't know. It would be great to know they wish to be more than they were yesterday in fear of losing what they have today. But, maybe it would be too much.

[@wisamrohilina3006]

Oh my God.. spot onnnn!!!!! I wish my husband would understand thisss.. is there a compatibility scale for types in a relationship?

[@Mavczers]

Lol the funny gag about the last one was me and my girlfriend last October. I had so much fun but she didn't. She thought that I didn't need her for it but it's a lot of value to be able to share with someone things you find fantastic.

[@CoachAhava-0000]

5:34 🫣🤣🤣🤣 If there isn't a conversation and mutual agreement we're not in a relationship. This is perfect. 9:28 Bob and Steve are common spider names with my family. 🤭

[@dr.jenchristian8307]

I'm a five & you 100% nailed it, thanks for your videos Abbey! :)

[@greatwavefan397]

7:33 You reminded me of that scene from Invader Zim LMAOO

[@finallyfree2BMe]

Omg 😆 after watching this i feel 100% like I am a 5. I was researching all the things because i wanted to be sure the test wasnt wrong lol in typical enneogram 5 style. I busted up with the part about walking past partner saying shes going to be a different career choice all the time and the one about hiding because you felt partner was in a mood

[@millicent_coronel9092]

Girl, why am I even watching this video when a I'm totally single since birth? But anywayz 2,3,4 and 5 hits me so hard!

[@938quilt]

i'm a 5 and moving to 7 is scary for me. it's like being on a roller coaster and out of control and not safe I also tend to chatter on messaging trying to communicate with gifs and emojis and it's hurtful when it's criticized - like I've been told to shut up or slapped or had someone walk away from me when I've tried to make them feel worthy of my time