Game of Thrones Abridged

[@louisroy4911]

I absolutely love hearing Schwifty say “Page 2” dozens of minute into these. The later it comes, the more I know we’re in for an incredible time

[@LeonHorsman]

Somebody in the live chat said this series started almost 5 years ago and TWOW is still nowhere in sight and even at this very relaxed rate there’s still a chance this series will be finished before TWOW is released and that really broke my mind

[@perlundgren7797]

Chances are the only TWOW we'll ever get will be Schwift just improvising the chapters.

[@TheElihs]

If Schwift finishes first, I don't think we'll ever get TWOW.

[@KaladinVegapunk]

haha you dont even know man, 5 years ago we were still somewhat hopeful it would be released soon..ive been reading the series since 2004, feast took a while but finally came out, then years and years went by and we finally got Dance in 2011..instead of reading it over a weekend, i took my time, especially when i heard a show was in preproduction. everyone was like well now we'll definitely get the books finished so the show wont catch up.. fast forward a decade, the show was one of the best adaptations, got too popular and threw out the core aspects and was written for drunks watching it in a bar i grew up dealing with Berserks long hiatus, years between each chapter, and now Muiras dead and we'll never get resolution. and it made me lose hope for ASOIAF haha considering all the sample chapters, and how long its been, i definitely think he'll get Winds out. i was fine with him enjoying the belated success of the series, doing tours and signings etc, but now thats done and thankfully he got to the grindstone during covid.. but Dream of Spring? thats vaporware, unless wrapping it all up is a lot easier than connecting stuff together like the mereenese knot, i dont think we'll ever see it, let alone the other 8 Dunk and Eggs. hes a fat old guy, not exactly the pinnacle of health. the world book and Fire & Blood were freaking awesome additions to the canon, but still not the same. ive kind of accepted we'll never get the last book, honestly. I would be 100% fine with a ghost writer wrapping up the last book using his notes, like wheel or dune, even if its only 75% as good at least it would be something, but he did say that one time if he died he has instructions noone can finish it hahah

[@trailerfield]

21.12.24 (Message from the Future Dude)

[@FringeSpectre]

@Gr8sc0tt well, he recently said in a blog post he was close to finishing two viewpoints so let's hope that means he's close to done overall.

[@Shirafune161]

The scene with Stannis and Renly made me want to scream "coregency, COREGENCY" at the screen.

[@btarczy5067]

Stannis trying to deal with social situations is almost cute. I‘d say „Someone hug him“ but I know that would only make it worse.

[@KlaraL-_-]

This was great! I love Catelyn´s chapters, as they always give us context about the past, the houses, geography, customs etc. Is was nice seeing Stannis and Renly, as they don´t have chapters of thier own.

[@postpunk6947]

Schwifty, oh Schwifty, please, please. I beggin' you on my knees, with tears in my eyes... Continue this series, there is so much material left, there is so much to do...

[@DongusMcBongus]

“The show portrayed this scene not well.” EXCUSE ME SCHWIFT. We got the absolute gem of a line in this scene “is he a ham?”

[@toastercatx]

I think this is my favourite line from the whole show 😂

[@guardduvie]

“There’s no peen like mortal peen.” This is the type of content that makes me a loyal shwifto.

[@majestichotdog1195]

the schwift has come in the darkest hour to bless us with divine content

[@blccdcrange]

I just finished binging all of these!

[@BlackfyreHD]

Same here, I finished the Arya VII episode last night and now this drops. Amazing!

[@dercurryer5342]

haha for me exactly the same

[@50colt30Productions]

Well I just finished my binge. Hopefully he'll do another one soon?

[@Buckaroobrandi]

Jesus that's a lot of listening

[@postpunk6947]

@@50colt30Productions I hope so, it's fantastic series, I love his point of view and methods of approach to characters and interpretations. Maybe it's comedy form, but there is not only humor.

[@CrazyGoGoVrose]

Stannis is is such a middle child stereotype and Renly is such a youngest child stereotype.

[@frimatt5355]

First off thanks these are really fun. Second your about as slow with this series as Mr. Martin him self C'mon let's get through this, got a lot way to go. Thrid did I mention that I really enjoy this and appreciate it thanks.

[@nononono3421]

Stannis was respecting the Night's Watch independence, and couldn't get them to do exactly as he wanted because the lord commander could argue from a position of independence. I think Stannis will give up going for the Iron Throne, he'll order his men to take the black, then give up his crown and take the black as well, and be elected as the 999th lord commander thanks to his men outnumbering the watch's own. 999th, or 666 when seen from north of the wall. He'll open the Black Gate, and unlike in the show it might be Stannis and his men who go into Bloodraven's cave, to kill Bran or to "save him" when he hears from Rickon that Bran is alive and went north. And Brienne had Catelyn promise her that she would not stop her from going after Stannis when the day would come (and Cat cleverly did not say the words "I promise"). Chances of Stannis becoming a Night's King-type seem really high. And Catelyn felt a cold chill down her neck when thinking of Stannis. I think Brienne will kill Stannis with Oathkeeper.

[@btarczy5067]

This reads like a text written because we have been waiting forever for any resolution but that doesn’t mean I don’t want it to happen!

[@lurksnitchtongue8986]

This is so schizo that I love it

[@miketrujillo3677]

I need you to put the book down. Slowly. We love you sweetie

[@srwooten2]

So close to catching this live! next time you slippery Schwift you.

[@prometeya3700]

You could say that Tywin was the true king of the 7 kingdoms, so his clash with Robb lives up to the title. The same could be said about Euron and Balon.

[@warpedwhimsical]

I think Stannis seeing Dragonstone as an insult is an extension of his unemotional character. Dragonstone is symbolically more important than Storm’s End, but practically it’s a worse title because the castle has minimal lands and incomes tied to it, especially when compared with Storm’s End

[@joshconiglio2564]

SHWIFTY!! Please, we need more notice for streams we would all love to watch them live

[@bonbonvegabon]

I was still in bed when this went live. I woke up after it was off line for an hour

[@frimatt5355]

Little finger had Lysa put the tears in john's wine which made him sick and pycelle finish the job because he thought cersie poisoned him.

[@ShubertReads]

2 hours of pure bliss 🙏

[@deffientllynotjalenbutler1736]

I have watched this at least 10 times and read the chapter more times that I can count and I still love every second

[@anp2514]

Schwifty, just wanted to say that this series is the reason I started reading the books a month ago, it feels like a friend is reading along with me which makes it feel much more enjoyable! With that in mind, at this rate, it doesn’t seem like I’ll finish the books before the heat death of the universe

[@MrTauren1996]

relistening to the latest before i pick up ACOK from the start. Missed the delight in hearing schwifty audibly turning a page and announcing "Page Two!" twenty minutes in. I love this stuff schwifty never stop not stopping.

[@Kriegerdammerung]

We need more streams like this!

[@aaronmelgar7116]

"Needs some urgency". Oh, that callback got me good man.

[@sethlongoria7526]

In relation to the subject of Stannis being like Iron, inflexible. Iron actually is relatively flexible and moldable in some instances, particularly when heated by fires.

[@wolafire]

Finally know what the hard core history guy does with his free time.

[@reevesavage]

Renly trolling his brother smh And the Stormlands having similar mythos to the Iron Islands is most likely because the Celtic and Nordic mythos happens to be quite similar

[@robertvanark1800]

I just found this channel a few months ago and... now I'm all caught up. It's made work more fun. Hopefully I catch the next one live!

[@postpunk6947]

I think only Feast for Crows have plausible title. In this book crows indeed feasting a lot.

[@violetsapphire952]

Actually, not all wind is gusting. Gusting wind is specifically wind which blows with brief, sudden periods of much higher intensity (called gusts). Wind can blow steadily, or gently, without much in the way of gusts.

[@baldbeardedbassist]

Why tf is Melisandre glamouring the sword?? That implies that she KNOWS that the sword is not Lightbringer and Stannis can't be Azor Ahai, but her POV still has her dead-set on Stannis being That Dude. What's REALLY going on there??

[@AltSchwiftX]

Melisandre believes Stannis is Azor Ahai, and she also believes in using deception and illusions for political reasons. She talks about this in her POV chapter in ADWD. She deceives others, and also deceives herself.

[@sukanyaagrawal361]

Have been binging this series for the past week and realised just now that this is the last episode. Please keep going, Schwift! ❤️❤️❤️

[@notharry9350]

Captain planet is a cartoon planet property, so I don't think he would get involved. I remember in the early 2000s, they would play it in the time slot before adult swim. I also remember it playing before toonami. I don't know the validity of that, though. 😅

[@lindsayshelton6311]

Tangent about stargazing got me real good Schwifty

[@c_weir753]

Definitely on purpose only 2 kings actually meet. George wants to show that it is the commonfolk that are truly affectrd

[@bonbonvegabon]

I just finished Catelyn 2 for the 300th time so this is perfect timing!!

[@JohnFourtyTwo]

Pretty much GRR Martin uses clickbait tactics with the titles of his books because you're right, there were no clash of kings or dance of dragons in those books. 😁

[@incanusolorin2607]

I didn’t see any thrones playing games or swords raining down, either

[@lisaeriksson1081]

52:20 57:35 1:01:45 1:19:25 peach 1:27:00

[@QueenDaenerysTargaryen]

A queen must listen to all. The highborn and the low, the strong and the weak, the noble and the venal. One voice may speak you false, but in many there is always truth to be found.

[@olasarcasm]

its been 84 years

[@devent6512]

Brothers confirmed, Alt Schwift X cinematic universe begins

[@stephenmoney4722]

i bet show-arya could make stannis laugh

[@zacharyrihner4825]

I love ya shwift and I love this series! My favorite content creator on KZbin

[@michal22011]

I discovered abridged series some time ago and i started backwards. From last episode to first(loooming into past). I was around #20 when episodes where like 10min long and now i see 2 fooking hours. I thought its just a blunder to my eyes but yeah shwifty!! Come on man i am listenening to this and more needed!:) cheers;)

[@Kingedwardiii2003]

So close to catching up

[@cactusitude]

I loved these videos, they're great. Will you be making more? No rush if you need a break, but if you're making more I'd love to join the livestreams.

[@noahreeverts465]

Wow.I just discovered this series and I just happen to be at this spot in the books on my seccond read through. Really stoked to follow along

[@zeitGGeist]

OH MY GOD THERE ARE OVER 100 OF THESE??? Sweet content gods

[@ragnarcroughs2784]

There is a reason why Stannis is called the Mannis by so many. He is blunt yes, but his stubborn persistence and courage makes him so epic. He was the first to be on the walls of kingslading. A king who fights his own battles.

[@lewistownsend8868]

he isn't though, he remains behind his army in command still epic tho

[@ragnarcroughs2784]

@@lewistownsend8868 not in the battle of blackwater bay right? Or was that a show only moment?

[@lurksnitchtongue8986]

@@ragnarcroughs2784 that's just the show because the show is idiotic

[@lewistownsend8868]

@@ragnarcroughs2784 yeah nah just in the show

[@shrinivasganti90]

Schwifticious Maximus

[@notjerod5076]

8:03 just casually forgets what’s happening after explaining the chapter

[@cathsaigh2197]

The first meaning of "Winterfell" is fell, the geographic feature not the past tense of fall. Though it of course can have multiple meanings, with Winterfell it's more likely than Casterly Rock being about the genre of music or Lannisport being about the type of wine.

[@tirzahgayla]

Goddesses never 'chose to die.' Their male authors chose it for them. The male authors thought it was a reasonable choice goddesses would jump at and feel it a noble choice because it was for the love of a man. Does that make logical sense? No. I'm not saying dying for love isn't noble for some but I seriously doubt any goddess in reality would choose that. If only there were real goddesses to ask but I'm pretty sure they don't think they've lived more fully by dying as you suggest. That's silly. Re Catelyn hate- dude some people just hate women; I even saw women hate women for no good reason. People hated Skylar when she instinctively knew something was wrong with her drug kingpin hubby and fought to get him away from her son. Hillary Clinton on Benghazi alone (not any other subjects) whose actions compared to Trump's for 'treason' are grossly outmatched and so many worldwide still support Trump and hate Hillary. She testified for 11 hours straight without complaint while Trump avoids it, complains, deters with appeals, pleads the 5th, etc for his comparable actions. There's so many reasons men and women alike hate other women, most having to do with insecurity and power. Right now women in Iran are being killed for not covering their hair. If you can't control your feelings when you see female hair maybe that's a You-problem.

[@solarwalker1044]

^this

[@nightsage217]

45:00 At least Robert is truly a man to behold before kingship ruins him. in his way. I think.

[@ErbBetaPatched]

Stannis' dying words will be about that peach, i swear it

[@taylorburkhead1060]

Your Old Greg has the most American accent I've ever heard.😃😆😄

[@alexarias5717]

In the show, Lysa revealed she was the one that poisoned her husband on Little finger's command. I didn't know that was a show only detail??

[@bigassboy9343]

It isn't, it's revealed in the last chapter of a storm of swords (aside from the epilogue)

[@alexarias5717]

@@bigassboy9343 ahhh! Ok cool

[@HelciusCabral]

This is one of my favorites

[@Gatinois]

I really like that serie and I hope to see more content like that in the future.

[@SapphireSolstice67]

More chapters please

[@RC-lw5lw]

And so the saga that is ACoK Abridged presses onward!

[@osmundkettleback5815]

WHY DO I KEEP MISSING THESE FFS

[@SamanthaBoooooooo]

ME TOO. I have never caught one and not getting the notifications in time.

[@classicdansmith]

It’s literally faster to just read the chapters yourself than to watch these 😭

[@faisalkamal4319]

Sits and complains That's relatable

[@CiceroMagnus]

I'm sure this is only me but I really miss the old half an hour or so non-stream eps. :/ it was just pure Alt, he got on his own tangents but the only person distracting him was himself...who could care about these parasocial stream relationships.

[@Rafael-kl2ts]

why did he stop making these?

[@billychops1280]

Just one thing to say about stannis, his ideals and morals don’t change to fit his claim, his law of Primogeniture are universal (at least in feudal societies and in the east with wealth that gets passed down) and he wanted Jon Arryn to tell Robert when Robert was still relatively young and after finding out could divorce Cercie for margery or someone and have legitimate children with her which would move stannis and Renly further down not to mention stannis would have eventually given it to Renly anyway since he had no male heirs

[@inamv873]

at this rate we can look forward to the series ending in 99 years just in time for the next book

[@SamanthaBoooooooo]

Yes! My first live stream and I'm nearly caught up too 😸 Hey sqwad 👋

[@SamanthaBoooooooo]

Nope wtf missed it. I am not getting these notifications at the right times!!!

[@devonhoyt6422]

Are there going to be any more of these?? 😥

[@KaladinVegapunk]

youre forgetting a major factor with Arwen, shes half elf like Elrond (and his brother Elros, Aragorns great great etc grandpa) so yeah she gets a choice but in LoTR and expanded in Silmarillion, death is the gift of men, they aren't tethered to the land like elves are, just going to Valinor on earth and can even respawn like glorfindel men get to cruise off to their own afterlife that only they get to go to, but morgoth perverted their jealousy and fear to see death as a curse instead always kind of a cool way to look at it to be honest hanging out with the valar pantheon and elves sounds way cooler than going off to some lame heaven, unless its also pagan inspired like valhalla or elysium haha, not a lame monotheistic one

[@nadezhdashikhova6503]

"I am the storm, Euron" has the same energy as "I am weed, MGK" 🤣

[@definitelynotspam3134]

Fuck yea. I need more GoT Abridged in my life.

[@jameshart2693]

Just on the imagery of Stannis' banner. Its interesting that a 'hart' is an adult male deer when Stannis' sigil is a stag in a flaming heart. Would love to know your thoughts on this as I am thinking about getting this sigil tattooed given my surname is "Hart". I look forward to more videos.

[@MsZeeZed]

Stannis deserves a Pyramid of Geezer

[@bro4life693]

I fucking missed it!!!!!! I have my bell ring and everything how tf did I miss it 😭. Stay Schwifty brethren ✊🏻

[@tonaradosstharayn8591]

I always wondered if Renly wouldn't have been the best king. He likes people and I do think he cares about them as well. He is just also lavish. I can imagine that he will spend a lot of money too, his knights wants to entertain themselves in tournees and he likes balls and fashion. So maybe he would ruin the realm in another way... At least he has the chance to grow beyond is kinda childish ways and... Truly most of as would flex the way he does when half the realm supports me. And I really would have loves seeing him teaming up with Robb. Regarding he homosexuality I think Jamie says in the books as well, that it was one of the worst kept secrets in kings landing. But I think most lords won't mind as long as he does his dutie - he already married the girl, he just needs to get her pregnant. And many gay men did that over the centuries (just... Not really in Westeros? Jon Connigton never married, a Targaryen price run away with his lover, the Blackfyre was to young... That's why I really believe the Blackfish is gay, it fits a pattern). That's one of the things I like about the Show that you get insights and scenes from people like Renly as well, not just from some POV characters. I like the line from Margery "I can turn around and you can pretend I'm Loras", lol.

[@kieronbeard]

Long time no schwift

[@superkidplays6555]

Looking forward to X-bowl

[@btarczy5067]

With all the shade Renly throws it‘s ironic how he ended up!

[@aleksandersokal5279]

Does Schwifties monologue about brothers tell us that he is the brother of Alt Shift X?

[@itsajackaldotcom]

when is the next one coming out?

[@w0ttheh3ll]

How is protecting your kids not selfish? Especially if it causes the deaths of thousands.

[@matthewkemp594]

Grassy-grass is my favorite rapper.

[@ken_cognito]

1:15:00

[@evancarlson5805]

Arwen died so she *did* go to heaven and hang out with the Tolkien gods. The elves who don't die just live forever in a peaceful land. It's not heaven.

[@baldanders]

you're wrong about stannis

[@afreyinthesnow9015]

Al fin!

[@jameson32]

"Abridged".

[@LionOfGondor]

that fucken bot lol

[@captainblighe7297]

Wonderful.

[@nbaz93]

How is your old Greg reference so accurate yet the accent is American 🌚

[@dragonrider4339]

That sucks they didnt put in the peach scene.. that would have been funny 😂

[@tessierashpoolmg7776]

Don't save for your down-payment on the house BUY "Super Duper Chats"!

[@BlackFoliageVol1]

Oh yeah! Let’s go!

[@GlamourAmyria]

The truth is the truth, and the rules are the rules. There are no "different political philosophies" at play here. Stannis is the rightful heir by the Baratheon dynasty, Renly has no claim, and Renly is entirely in the wrong. You do not compromise with right and wrong. You do not play nice for the sake of your own political power. You do what is right, always, with no regard for anything else.

[@pabloreed7717]

But remember, Stannis has no proof that Joffrey is illegitimate. He has strong suspicions but no conclusive proof. He insists it is absolutely true because it benefits him, but only we the reader know that he actually happens to be right (he does not).

[@GlamourAmyria]

@@pabloreed7717 Westeros doesn't have DNA tests. There is no such thing as "conclusive proof," so you can't request that as a metric. Stannis has as much proof as anyone reasonably can, outside of a testimony from Cersei herself. He investigated the issue with Jon Arryn, looked at all the available bastards for comparison, and read the lineages of Baratheon / Lannister coupling. It's not feasible to have any more evidence than that. That's actually significantly more evidence than most people have for *any* inheritance, legitimate or otherwise. Plus, you can add the circumstantial evidence of Jon's poisoning immediately following their investigation. Secondly, Stannis explicitly does not want to be king. He states this clearly many times, and even ignoring his words, the reader can tell that the idea of being king gravely stresses him out and causes him a lot of grief. He doesn't insist on his claim because it benefits him. He insists on it because he believes it to be true, which it is. Duty is what matters, above all else. Wants do not enter into it. Lastly, justice is justice regardless of whether the subjects know of it. It exists on an absolute, cosmic level, indifferent of the individual participants. If a random citizen in King's Landing were to stab Cersei and kill her for no reason, that would be justice, because Cersei deserves it. The same applies to Stannis's claim. Stannis is, in fact, the rightful heir by Baratheon lineage. Even if he had no proof at all, it would still be cosmically correct for him to be king.

[@MsZeeZed]

The fallout from the War of Five Kings is all the A-list players are dead & the B-team end up running the world (Catelyn, Cersei & Tyrion). They are not the best rulers, they are what’s left, so its easy to criticise their actions, but they’re often playing with half a deck.

[@MsZeeZed]

Pop

[@dr.vikyll7466]

Isn't Cat a weird zombie thing?

[@patrickbruno6578]

I kind of like Stannis. He reminds me of those american politicians that run for president out of duty. Like Mitt Romney. He's horrible at relating to people and his whole reason for running is because he believed nobody else can handle this job right now so I guess it has to be him even though he didnt want it. Hillary Clinton was kinda like this too. People like that always lose in the end. I wonder if we can look to recent history like this to figure out where Stannis' story arc is headed.

[@MusicalPenguin42]

YES!

[@montsa]

Whii!