people are the WORST (r/AITA)

patreon: / savvycat
second channel: / @itsqiwi
podcast: / @savvycatproductions9255
end screen song: open.spotify.com/track/6YMWp9...
my music: open.spotify.com/artist/7jEk4...
my music videos: / @savannahmusic
instagram: / thequeerkiwi
twitter: / thatqueerkiwi
tiktok: vm.tiktok.com/3fGWhT/
business inquiries: [e-mail]
** stray kids skzoo plushies were pre-ordered from the official website **

[@hermitized4391]

That first one…”somehow” they wound up making out in front of everyone…wtf

[@deinodinosuchus]

ikr 😭 like yes alcohol removes your inhibitions in most cases but it doesn’t MAKE you an asshole, it just reveals the already asshole-ness inside

[@ErutaniaRose]

@@deinodinosuchusYeeep.

[@RPGLover87]

"I got drunk and accidentally tripped and landed inside her."

[@Lynnie2005]

I would have DUMPED him that night and continued the party tbh. I don't know how close they were, but 8 months with a pathetic asshole is a waste of time not worth letting anyone ruin my birthday.

[@ErutaniaRose]

@@RPGLover87 PFFFT!

[@catsareexcellent]

I’ll never get why some people get their panties in a twist about woman having nipples. Everyone has nipples.

[@justagirlwearingglasses]

Ohh, God forbid. Victoria's secret has been revealed.

[@lydiaboll2872]

@@justagirlwearingglasses😂

[@SpecSolve]

mom i talked back because thats how a conversation works

[@SLYKM]

For real I always was confused on the "don't talk back," I even had to get on adults who acted like my children weren't allowed to respond.

[@dreamspiritanimated6280]

The first story is giving: “I murdered someone, why are the police after me? 🤔”

[@srose1088]

I remember hearing one of these stories where the dude got in a fist fight. He left and some time gap, but now he's hiding from the police... is he the ass hole? 0-60 LMAO we are missing something here.

[@ErutaniaRose]

That second guy needs to address his classism.

[@clonnie-cloo]

for real. he's the asshole but the REAL asshole is his family if they're judging him for being with a woman that's "below their class" or whatever. they just need to not go to that party and he needs to have a serious conversation with his family about their biases

[@roselover411]

That was my thought. Like wow way to be an entitled asshole

[@pinkgiraffe378]

seriously jesus christ

[@kuckag5710]

"my family has an upperclass mindset" ffs just say you're rich snobs

[@gloomy_gal]

On the sextoy one its incredible hypocritical to complain about being uncomfortable being forced to leave after you just patronized your friend touching on something she was bulled for and shamed for in high school and embarassing her in front of the entire friend group. You should feel dumb because that was dumb and hurtful just for a joke. Not a real friend.

[@hexonyou]

yeah his non-apology was the most classic manipulation in the book, throwing it back on her for "ruining the vibe because of a bad joke". No YOU ruined the vibe with your shitty prank gift, and refusing to own up to it while trying to gaslight her into apologizing TO YOU is absolute bs... this is how you end up friendless my guy

[@Wepospalient]

I can't imagine having such a severe lack of empathy as to bring up someone's trauma, make them uncomfortable, and hurt them emotionally, and then sending out a complete non apology, saying "it was just a joke, you're ruining the vibe." Actual garbage human being, that story really set me off.

[@Memmyrabilia]

The birthday dinner guy was wild. Who drinks that much at a freaking STEAKHOUSE?

[@hywel8235]

Steakhouses are naturally expensive. Eight drinks are also not that many if you drink regularly

[@Toaster_Draws]

Alcoholics, probably.

[@ndawn90]

​​@@hywel8235If you can have 8 drinks within a 1-2 hour period and aren't drunk because you drink regularly, then you have a drinking problem, period. If $200 worth of alcohol doesn't get you drunk, you have a problem.

[@hywel8235]

@@ndawn90 just because the drinks are expensive doesn't mean they have a high ac content. The drink doesn't always match the price

[@LilChuunosuke]

​@hywel8235 bro i have a family history of kidney stones & I still wouldn't even have that many non-alcoholic drinks at a dinner, ESPECIALLY not one I'm not paying for! If its a hot summer day, I might cap it at 4 and, again, that's with NO ALCOHOL. 8 is excessive REGARDLESS OF ALCOHOL CONTENT.

[@sternenblumen]

The "friend" giving OP a sex toy is such a huge asshole. He was so insistent on her opening it in front of everyone because the "joke" would not have been as funny if she opened it without an audience - for him! I hate the "You just can't take a joke" type of bullying so much 🤬.

[@aristalling2061]

“Goodwill trash” I literally found an original 90s YSL dress , got made fun for having it till people saw the tag.

[@gabriellehitchins9182]

More likely to get natural fibres at an op shop

[@ErutaniaRose]

To the sex toy one, that was a super tone-deaf gift. He KNEW they were actively shamed for that and made it a public showing instead of a private joke later. Like…bro.

[@sousaphone420]

Remember: Drunk actions are sober thoughts.

[@ErutaniaRose]

For real. I’ve been crazy drunk before, guess what I did? Watched a meh animated movie and said the characters looked interesting for the art style and why I liked or disliked the designs, and some more giggling than normal. That was in Vegas after a huge dinner with family, heavy drink, and half a BOTTLE of Champaign, lol.

[@kittenwizard4703]

Yeah, whoever said "you aren't what you think" needs their harddrives searched

[@hippiefarts]

Listen, I think the dude cheated on his girlfriend & handled it poorly, but would you be saying "drunk actions are sober thoughts" if upon sobering up he had expressed regret and discomfort over what happened? I just think it's a dangerous line of logic to be asserting that our drunk decision making is representative of our sober thinking, especially when that is verifiably, physiologically false.

[@galaxychill9578]

eh, idk, intrusive thoughts are a thing

[@galaxychill9578]

but the point is you wouldn't act on them so I get it

[@littleblueclovers]

Giving yacht OP the benefit of the doubt, if the dress was the equivalent of wearing a casual shirt-dress at a black-tie event, I’d try to come up with a compromise. GF sounded like she just wanted to wear it at a “special event”. He could’ve told her that the yacht party may be expensive, but emotionally not very meaningful, and the dress can make an appearance at a better occasion? Then I’d suggest planning a truly special and sentimental/romantic date event where she is in the spotlight. Alternatively, even if the dress is a literal trash bag, just inform family members who make a fuss about it that it’s literally her father’s dying wish. But seeing OP’s outburst, it sounds like he’s not too different from his judgmental family

[@Shamazya]

There were so many options he could have tried first. Like maybe there's a way to elevate the dress while keeping the integrity of it. Something that sentimental should earn at least some discussion on a compromise rather than just calling it trash.

[@CharlesPayet]

26:43 that Mom is 100% NOT the asshole. The guy said he was going to do it to prove a point, but then he failed and couldn’t admit that he was wrong. That’s on him.

[@RPGLover87]

The biggest red flag for the second guy was his insistence that he "Tried to make it seem like she belonged on his side of the family" - she doesn't have to belong with your family, your marriage is a union of the two. You are starting a new family, the important part is whether your parents fit in with the combined NEW family which it doesn't sound like they do. If your parents are going to be shit about the dress, that's their problem to worry about and not hers.

[@16poetisa]

"unfortunately, she loves me" what a Freudian slip lol

[@PancreamZombie]

The biologist's one hits close to home cause I, myself am a scientist (physicist) and my mom won't stop saying things about how everything is "made up" just so that "the system" (whatever that means) "can keep us under control". Needless to say, she's a flatearther and antivaccine supporter. I literaly don't know if she says these kind of things to antagonize me cause she will get MAD at me whenever I try to educate her and yell at me that it is disrispecful to doubt her "deeper knowledege of things". GOD, I didn't know there were more parents like this, and I don't feel better knowing it.

As a fellow physics guy, that annoys the sh*t out of me. But next time, hide her phone and when she asks for it, pretend that you threw it out and tell her, why bother pretending that the phone can actually _do_ anything since the science it's based on is just made up anyway. Pretending that the phone is anything other than a solid piece of plastic is just _"how the system keeps us under control"._ You can have a lot of fun throwing her own garbage statements right back at her. ;-)

[@ChloePotaters]

Ugh the first one reminded me of my ex, who cheated on me at my New Year’s Eve party I threw, and then said that same “I’m not a cheater” shit. I said “well, you are now”

[@jessebrazeal1861]

The bra story reminds me of when my father said that my nipples were "too distracting"

[@InquieteNightshade]

This one time in high school my mother lectured me for going outside without a bra on because, “you’re breasts are too big to be without a bra. It’s inappropriate.” Now a days I don’t go anywhere with a bra because bras give me gender dysphoria.

[@irios1066]

Ew I'm so sorry that happened to you. Big ew.

[@GoroAkechi_Real]

OH MY GOD YOU TOO???

[@qryptid]

😬😬😬 my actual face. Hope you continue to wear what you want esp in the comfort of your own home :)

[@Toaster_Draws]

Damn, that's.. terrifying.

[@champ1ontryymegaming304]

Going braless with a shirt on is NOT the same as an exposed "D". It's not like the girl was braless AND shirtless. A better comparison would be a guy in sweatpants with no underwear. In that case, I'm sure the bra free roommate would not give any cares about the fact the guy was wearing sweat pants without underwear. I wish the unequal comparison was called out.

[@LexTime89]

I agree. I was thinking a better comparison would be free balling in some basketball shorts, not being totally exposed.

[@cdbf98]

I side with the wildlife biologist so so much. I am a mid 20s female fisheries biologist and I can’t tell you this sheer amount of times middle-aged or older men have told me that I am wrong because they’ve been fishing their whole life and they know better than me.

[@alicebthegachaweirdo8378]

AITA for thinking that Israel should be banned from competing in Eurovision Song Contest ever again?

[@briannaobrien4419]

Yoooo when I saw "Israel booed while onstage at Eurovison" I'm like "WHY THE FUCK WERE THEY EVEN THERE?!"

[@ikilikii]

Settler colonie Is**el should be banned. End of sentence

[@DeuxMilleVingtQuatre]

I feel bad for the singer cos she was really good tonight.

[@tatertotnco]

nope, free palestine🍉🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸

[@bellaswitchtrials]

nah, youre based

[@ouijacorn]

For the second guy, if he thought the dress was really that offensive or inappropriate for the party, I'm sure there's a compromise they could have come to. Maybe promise to take her out on a date night somewhere she can wear the dress (since he's mr. moneybags, this shouldn't be too tall an order). That way, she can still wear it and feel beautiful in it and he won't have to worry about her being embarrassed by his awful family (though let's be real, he's worried about her embarrassing *him*, her feelings on this don't seem to matter). All of that is if the dress is inappropriate, but it seems more likely to me, based on his comments, that he just thinks it looks "cheap". Edit: oh man, I posted this right before Kiwi said essentially the same thing. Post-edit edit: I would go so far as to say that giving someone a sex toy when that kind of thing is not normal in your relationship counts as sexual harassment. *Especially* if it's for the purpose of humiliating the recipient.

[@agentzapdos4960]

People from different economic classes aren't compatible. The wealthy hate the poor and prefer to pretend they don't exist.

[@paulovitorsouzanunes4854]

I would say that even if theyd agreed and compromised, he is still the asshole. His mistake is in going along with his classicist family, and wanting to please them, instead of making his gf happy

[@ttintagel]

@@paulovitorsouzanunes4854 Well, it is their event. If you choose to go to somebody else's event, it's part of the deal to dress appropriately.

[@paulovitorsouzanunes4854]

@@ttintagel im not talking about that, im talking about his atitude to please his family, while implying his gf is in the wrong for not being rich enough, like, he made clear that his family thinks she doesnt diserve him bc of her poor ass, and he is still on the side of his family??? Fuck off

[@heartofthewild680]

Yes! Also, if he’s going to tell her how to dress, he should at least pay for the clothes he wants her to wear.

[@samskeels1691]

Sex toy story is super shitty, I completely understand why he was thrown out and I woild have even given it back to him and said something embarrassing back. F that dude for being so shameless and inappropriate

[@niazkordei]

if the (ex) girlfriend in the first story had a reddit account i bet she'd make a post titled something like "AITA for giving my boyfriend an ultimatum?" telling what happened and (hopefully) most of the comments would be telling her she's NTA

[@FoxGameCZ]

she should break up with him, I don't believe he has no feeling for his college friend and she deserves better

[@nickronca1562]

I don't think he was either though. Yes, I get why she wanted to break up with him, but at the same time he clearly lacked any judgment with however much he was drinking. Like you would think that if he was even a little bit "there" that he would at least *try* to hide his make out section with Kayla instead of just doing it in front of everyone. The fact that he did it *in front* of people seems to be all the more evidence that he really really wasn't able to think properly. It doesn't excuse his actions obviously, and I'm not blaming the girlfriend for her decision, I just feel bad for him that he messed up this badly and couldn't recover from it. I hope both him and his ex are doing better after the incident. I hope that she doesn't have long term trust issues after that incident. Overall take, it's just a shitty situation, and I understand both of them and don't think either of them were the asshole. [Yes, I know this comment will get hate, I don't care, I'm free to state my opinion].

[@sandysandor6052]

This guy with the girlfriend's dress could've just said "look, you know my family is a little snobby when it comes to clothes and let me be honest, this dress will unfortunately probably make them judge you. But if you're okay with that, I will support you and if THEY don't like it, it is their loss. You look really cute". Fixing the situation in my head for my own sanity.

[@puddlesgachayt3189]

I've lost my faith in humanity for some of these

[@crawdaddy2004]

It took you this to lose your faith in humanity? 😂 You have/had way more faith than I did in humanity.

[@paulovitorsouzanunes4854]

The first one made me MAD, the guy is so ignorant of his girlfriends feeling, and fuck, he doesnt even know his OWN fucking feelings, a guy like that shouldnt be dating at all, he should be at a therapist, working on how feeling matter

[@puddlesgachayt3189]

@@paulovitorsouzanunes4854 RIGHT????

[@firelordoregano5632]

as someone who doesn't come from money, my brain literally cannot compute with the idea of being UPSET at your child for spending a life-changing *50,000* fucking dollars on a long term life investment *instead* of a one day's fancy party

[@zenleeparadise]

"I had 8 drinks but I wasn't drunk" bro, you're an alcoholic. I say this as an alcoholic. 😂 8 drinks in this economy is asinine. No one would do that if they were the one paying.

[@HumbleWooper]

Story one, yeah that was a super fair ultimatum for OP's (former) girlfriend to make. If he made out with a female friend while drunk once, who's to say similar mistakes won't happen again? The only way to guarantee it would be to never drink another drop of alcohol. For the rest of his life. Some people are fine with making that sacrifice for someone who's important enough to them... but I don't get the impression OP is one of those people.

[@mosseater111]

That's another thing though, getting drunk doesn't make you do that unless you always really wanted to... I only got drunk once in my life granted because I was pressured and detest the taste of alcohol, but all I got was like, super sleepy and just mumbled about my hate of a celebrity I always kept to myself, lol. Being drunk just makes your more closed off thoughts and possible actions that could lead from those thoughts come out, I'd go as far to say if you wanna see a person's true self then hang out with them for drinks. Alcohol makes you more vulnerable in a way where your walls are more torn down, but it *never* makes you hurt people unless you always wanted to and have always had thoughts to. I know that's not the full context for this particular case exactly, but you know, still applies that if he has those thoughts of other women then it's just sober thoughts coming to light when drunk.

[@HumbleWooper]

I thought about this story some more, and honestly... I think how he acted afterward when he was sober is an even worse look for him than the makeout itself, however it came to happen. He shows zero remorse or accountability for hurting his (ex-)girlfriend's feelings. He blamed the alcohol for his actions, then said nothing about avoiding drinking (or even just avoiding getting drunk) with friends in the future. Which makes me think either it's not truly the alcohol's fault, or he doesn't care for his GF's feelings enough to regret hurting them and want to change. Or more likely both.

[@obcorc]

I think the ultimatum is the only thing I have a problem with the GF doing. OP is obviously the real problem here. He's the one that cheated. I just think having. a relationship predicated on that level of control over your partner's social life is bound lead to a really bad dynamic. Don't get me wrong, major trash move on his part, GF did the right thing in the end, leave em. I just think it's all toxic to try to control or change a partner like that. Don't try to build a sculpture out trash, just leave the dump. Like seriously, DON'T cheat on me with your friend, is a pretty easy bar to clear like, I didn't even know it counted as a bar. I thought we all just. Knew that.

[@Tiana_atr]

Yeah no, personally there wouldn't be any chance of me staying with that guy. I don't care if he had promised to never see Kayla again and would never again touch alcohol because that was a major breech of trust and I don't think I could ever truly trust him again after that point. I'd just be constantly paranoid whenever he'd be on his own or with any other female friends. Better to just not deal with that paranoia and distrust and straight up drop him, no second chance. Also extra context from the reddit comments of that story. Dude says he wouldn't actually want to date Kayla because he knows she is a serial cheater and doesn't want that for himself, and HE HAS LIED TO HER PREVIOUS BOYFRIENDS TO COVER FOR HER WHEN SHE CHEATS!!!! The dude is a piece of shit in every way possible.

[@rinkuraku5251]

I feel like a common thread in most of these stories is misogyny.

[@larad9180]

Funny, I’ve gotten stupid drunk several times and I’ve literally never ended up “somehow” making out with my 100% platonic friends, let alone while in a relationship. That’s not how it works.

[@Anonymous-54545]

Idk lol, i've done shit like that. Not monog tho so idk.

[@pepolite4082]

The Dad saying "Your being disrespectful." Dude. That's my Dad to the T. I've been no contact with him for nearly 2 years now after him threatening violence towards his daughter (me) because he thought I was being disrespectful to a very similar situation. I will no longer tolerate toxic bullshit in my life. I'm surrounded by amazing friends and beautiful people and my Dad is unfortunately not one of them. Way to go. Another worst Dad of the year goes to:

[@tiramisusss]

i love how everytime you re-rainbow your hair the dominant colour is always a different one

[@Heyden_Weid]

The dress story reminds me of my ex. They had bought a dress for a date that I thought was pretty ugly. It didn’t fit their body type. But they were so excited to it show me, I couldn’t possibly tell them that. They were so happy and I just couldn’t crush them like that. So we went on our date, and we had fun. They never knew how I felt about the dress. And I didn’t let it bother me. They were happy and that’s all that mattered.

[@ttintagel]

I think there's a difference between ugly/unflattering and inappropriate for the occasion.

[@Heyden_Weid]

@@ttintagel the guy in the story called it ugly. He said it looked like it was from goodwill lol

[@FrostedFrills]

Oof I've been in the situation that the mom was talking about... I sincerely hope that her husband doesn't say "but my *real* job is harder" as an excuse to not admit how difficult her life is.

[@pinkgiraffe378]

Honestly I am lowkey envious of women with small chests who can not ever wear bras. Like my back and chest hurt if I don't wear a bra moving around a lot or for extended periods of time.

[@LoudLeo3]

The one with the dad sounds like a conversation I’d have with my dad except my dad would also bring up the older half brother who is a big wig at some big company and say something to the effect of don’t worry you’ll be successful like him someday ( the brother haven’t seen in 4 years, when I get a call every time they need to reset the WiFi 🙄 ).

[@aduckofsomesort]

The boyfriend probably isn’t wearing a bra when he visits. If OP should wear a bra, he should wear a bra.

[@lostshadows768]

If the know it all dad did look things up, I wouldn't be shocked if he ended up quoting her own work, if she's published. It's definitely something I've heard about happening.

[@SwarmofBees-inatrenchcoat]

Regarding the first one: I get that there can be a one time mistake, but if being drunk around this person makes you kiss them, what is stopping you from kissing them again next time you're drunk?

[@SLYKM]

I agree, I just think that OP wants to be with his friend, tho. Even the way he talks about her. He says he loves his gf, but friend is AMAZING and they have so much in common. He never mentions why or how much he loves his gf, but he explains why his friend is cool to be around with. It's like he's explaining why he should be friends with her still, but not why, idk, his gf shouldn't be worried about him wanting to be with her. So of course, somewhere else in the thread (not sure if Kiwi mentions it bc I didn't finish this part of the video yet) but the reason he's not with his friend is because she's a serial cheater and he'd even help cover for her sometimes. Gf made the correct choice.

[@JoltYourLife]

@@SLYKMhe sounds like a coward

[@kenziethemom]

The dress one: my husband and i went through this before. I come from a poor family, and have an alt style. My husband comes from a better family and dresses preppy. Our first time meeting his family, he did wha Kiwis advice was... He loved me and my style but just be prepared for some comments, however he said he'd be there behind me if anyone went too far,but he didn't think they would. His family loves me, and only remarks I've heard is them acknowledging my style, never knocking it. They've even shared clothes with me, and just made sure it was my style 😊 Good families just care that their family member is loved and are cared for by their partners ❤

[@pinkgiraffe378]

That first one wow, he takes zero responsibility and the way he frames it is so ridiculous it's funny. Like making out with someone is not something that just randomly happens to you, like it's very easy to not do that.

[@Toaster_Draws]

1st post- I think it's kinda funny that this dude says "the 'punishment' doesn't fit the crime" when it actually does?? You made out with your "friend" makes sense she wants you to cut contact.

[@adventuretimeness222]

The goodwill trash part had my mouth falling open in complete and utter horrified shock!

[@Afatgrandma]

30:00 Its for the husbands to provide, so the sons shouldn't have gotten any money. Thats the husbands mommy and daddy providing, not the husband being a provider

[@templofzoom9635]

I really empathize with the lady who has the kids and home business. The dude in that scenario behaved a lot like my ex who eventually broke it off to leave me with most of the custody. Such class.

[@LoonyLovesLondon]

We don't even need to be in doubt on if he would order 8 drinks on his money - he said for her bday the two of them are about 100-150 bucks, so he admits he doesn’t order that way on his own dime...

[@VesperTime]

Came here to say this. He could easily have had as much to drink any other time, but he saved it for when he wasn't paying. He was 100% taking advantage of her.

[@ericgeneric135]

On the first one, is "sharing" or "unsharing your location" really a thing people do? I'm in my 40s and would never treat my or my partner's phone as an ankle monitor. That seems so weird to me.

[@crustycrabpizza4581]

I think it might be a generational thing. I have the location of all my friends and family and they have mine too :) I thought it was a bit odd at first but now I am really glad that we do this

[@fishbrain9591]

I can understand both sides, personally I prefer my privacy but I understand why it would be important to know where everyone is just in case

[@isa.unchained]

my parents are in their late 40s and won’t let me go out unless my location is shared (I’m in college) and my friends have my location which makes sense for my safety, but sometimes it is weird: my ex had my location on his lock screen at all times and would send screenshots saying he was watching over me.

[@Anonymous-54545]

I agree that it's bizarre, however if you have this as a norm then blocking it suddenly would indeed seem strange.

[@Anonymous-54545]

I never wear a bra. I'm the manager of a 35 person artist community and I do work meetings in my bra or in a shirt w no bra. I give tours like that. I don't tell women to stop sunbathing bc we're giving a tour. If someone is that immature they aren't welcome here and if they stare they aren't welcome either.

[@HumbleWooper]

The sex toy gift... joke gifts of any sort are only appropriate if the /recipient/ also thinks it's funny. And literally nobody likes being mocked, ESPECIALLY for things as personal as having unconventional sex interests or needs. There's a world of difference between friendly teasing and mean-spirited mocking, and what that guy did was absolutely mean-spirited. Or at BEST he listened to the school rumor mill and assumed she was in on the joke, but I very much doubt that's the case since he didn't backtrack or apologize when she reacted poorly. Man needs to get a brain of his own and some emotional maturity fast. And until he does, he should stop playing "pranks" on people.

[@pinkgiraffe378]

I love the girl's responses in the fourth one, I always admire people who stand up for themselves in those situations bc I am so bad at that.

[@Zaddy-Lu]

I knew the birthday dinner OP was the jerk when they mentioned that there was "technically no limit" to how much they could spend on dinner. It was further confirmed by them mentioning that 2 more times in their post. What if OP's girlfriend picked a high-end sushi restaurant & the bill came to $1,000? I think OP would have been livid & probably would have expected their gf to help pay.

[@pinkgiraffe378]

The sex toy one breaks my heart honestly and plays right into the whole slut shaming, purity culture, rape culture, and like "boys will be boys" fucked up nature of society. Like that counts as sexual harassment in my mind as well as bullying and humiliation. That's kind of a sore spot for me a different way to the woman in that post bc I was bullied in school and the people would say it's just a joke, but if you are going out of your way to shame someone, or make them look bad, or make them uncomfortable, especially in front of other people, that's not a joke, it's cruel and malicious. Also it's not okay to make someone else's trauma or struggles the butt of a joke either.

[@ttintagel]

I can absolutely see a scenario where Sasha's dress would be inappropriate for the event and he knew that she would be embarrassed showing up in it and wouldn't be able to change because they'd be out on a boat. I know some people believe that you should just wear whatever you feel like wherever you feel like, but that is just truly not always the case. However, it's like he TRIED to find the worst, most insensitive, most clueless way possible to try to communicate that to her.

[@SLYKM]

Second story "i just called a sentimental gift from my wife's passed away father, 'goodwill looking trash' I just need a second opinion, did I do an oopsie." Op needs to settle the pain of not being good enough for their family, and stop making it his wife's problem. Frankly, as another person said, he coukd have said his father's bday wasnt a good enough occassion, bur at the same time she probably is thinking its the best occassion bc shes going her father in law's burthday party. How symbolic, it's actually a really great gesture of love. Seems to be mostly ego "ill be more embarressed being at the party with my wife in an ugly dress than without her being with me." What, does he think, theyll chew him out for letting his wife wear what she wants, or act like he cant afford to give her something better to wear? And the ego on the dad, "my birthday party is a formal dress occassion." Either way, Op needed to let her explain why she wanted to wear it, he never said he tried to ask or what her views are. He needed to let her wear the sentimental dress and defend her "my wife wanted to honor her dad by wearing a gift he bought for her." Let them make comments about her dead dad's gift, it will reflect them not the wife. Im sure there were better ways to compromise if standing up to the fanily was too hard for him. Hurting her feelings bc of the pressure you feel or biases you have is just unacceptable.

[@SLYKM]

I can't be bothered to fix all the typos

[@user-nk7qd9hy8x]

@@SLYKM based

[@ErutaniaRose]

To that first one, omg. I swear just reading it I am discombobulated as someone who’s been gaslit a lot, and been in some shit relationships. So this was really helpful. I can’t believe I started empathizing with him in my confusion. Was a douche nugget.

[@SLYKM]

He's more than a douche nugget, he's at least half the douche chicken, lol.

[@devonsimone2891]

That last story oh my gosh. And when you said she was 28 years old, wow just wow… some people really never grow up.

[@briannaobrien4419]

Omfg I don't think I've seen a video after you've done your hair recently AND IT LOOKS SO GOOD!

[@Imacatfrfr]

I’m so happy you posted today. I just had a super shitty day at school and I was super overwhelmed all day. Thank you so much. Love you kiwi 🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜

[@xXLavender_crowXx]

Im not kiwi but i hope you have better days ahead!

[@Imacatfrfr]

@@xXLavender_crowXx tysm

[@gracewilliams9449]

how do you accidentally make out with a girl at your girlfriend’s birthday party AND THEN NOT EVEN CALL IT CHEATING

[@CharlesPayet]

28:29 those parents are the assholes.

[@blackwolfie555]

I have a genuine question related to the first story. I'm in my late twenties and I've never drank alcohol. Not even a sip, ever in my life. So my perception of what's it's like to be drunk and how much alcohol effects your self control is off. In a situation like in that first story, is there anyway that dude could have made out with his friend and had it not be something he decided to do? Unless you're on the verge of alcohol poisoning it seems like drunk people can make decisions, even if they don't make sense and it's stupid. How much does alcohol actually effect decision making ability?

[@hawkeyescoffee6399]

I think it very much depends on the individual, their tolerance, also how much alcohol he had. I don't drink anymore becaus of meds, but previously, I was a bit of a light weight, I would start to feel the effects after just 2 drinks (vodka was my tipple of choice), but it's usually just a warm light feeling, like I wouldn't be inhibited in how I talked or interacted with people at that point, but I would not be safe to drive, not drunk at that point just what we would call "merry". I have only really been truly drunk once (usually I would feel nausea before I reached that point so would back off, but that night I was drinking vodka & pineapple, which apparently wasn't registering as alcoholic, I know I had more than 5 drinks, but it was a long time ago so Idk how much more - at the time I was 5'6" and 125lbs soaking wet). For myself, being drunk just seemed to very severely lowered my inhibitions. I was more flirtatious with a couple of guys I had been too shy to admit I liked. The alcohol gave me confidence I didn't usually have. I kissed a guy I had admired from afar for 2 years, but I had enough awareness and logic still to say no to taking him home with me. I was able to walk just fine and talk just fine. I knew exactly what I was doing, but the hang ups that usually would hold me back were lessened, massively. I also remembered everything in excruciating details. As for the guy I kissed, I saw him again 2 days later (we had a mutual friend), not only did he not remember kissing me, but he didn't remember me at all. My ego took a hit lol. I never drank that much again, though. So, it really does depend, I think. It is perfectly possible that the OP & his friend have had feelings for a while but the alcohol just emboldened them. Is it possible he was so drunk he didn't know what he was doing? Yes, I have known people lie that, but usually if they get to that point, then their memory is spotty the next day. When it comes to the OP, I think they are holding back something because ethat "somehow we ended up..." I think he knows exactly how, and while he may have been drunk, I don't think he was as drunk k as he would like people to think. But... you do have to be pretty _uninhibited_ to make out with another girl at your gf's birthday party. Idk if that helps answer your question. 🤷

[@ErutaniaRose]

Honestly for me alcohol just makes it easy to unmask my autism, lol. When I was super super drunk in Vegas, after a huge dinner with 1 heavy drink and 1/2 a whole BOTTLE of Champaign afterwards in my room, I was just giggly and watched an animated movie and gave my art commentary. For most it really just lets your inhibitions go by the wayside. So I’d say unless this dude had brain damage from the alcohol, he was aware enough, and remembered enough to know he was making out with someone who was not his GF, and knew it was wrong.

[@paulovitorsouzanunes4854]

​@@hawkeyescoffee6399 Even if he was piss drunk, alchool only removes your inhibitors, the desire to do stuff is still 100% his, alchool doesnt make you do shit, it only gives you a little push to do what you already wanted

[@Bully_Biscuit]

The second story REEKS of upper class privilege

[@baileymoran8585]

I’m not monogamous but the first story pissed me off! If you choose monogamy, any couple’s only behavior is likely to be considered cheating, and that being drunk is not an excuse. Imagine someone getting arrested in a bar fight, and they say ‘no, officer! I’m not in trouble. You see, I’m drunk and wouldn’t normally do this!’ If that sounds stupid, it applies to boundary breeches!

[@CharlesPayet]

23:12 heck, that must not have been a very high end steakhouse. At many expensive steakhouses, those 8 drinks could have easily run several hundred bucks all by themselves.

[@andthatsshannii]

“Talking back” is something I’ve vowed to never accuse my kids of if I have them. I’ll call them out for rude behaviour, but I’ll never punish them for proving me wrong. My whole childhood, any time I said something pretty reasonable and it made my mother’s point look silly, I’d get punished for talking back. “Why aren’t you at school?” “It’s a snow day” “Stop talking back” This literally does my head in

[@lovefordanielmatthews]

That first one escalated so fast

[@arthurspils2565]

1st: christ his lack of understanding 🤦‍♂ - if he'd been like "IDK, do I leave my best friend or girl friend!?!?!??" I'd get it but the complete why should I attitude is just ick 2nd: 1 screw this guy, reminds me of a few people ik, 2 anyone else just want to see the dress out of curiosity? Anyway, well said Kiwi 3rd: No. Condescending ahole dad - money on the mum calling just to make him shut up. 4th: Her house, do whatever - the bf sounds like he might be making excuses... 5th: What the hell 6th: HOLY S- I thought that was going somewhere else with that title - anyway, yep YTA, what are you drinking to have eight of them in one meal, jesus 7th: Bro just take the L

[@tezzanoia]

People like in the bra story would absolutely drop dead at some German beaches and stuff like that lmao. We have so called FKK (Freikörperkultur - free body culture) beaches where you go specifically to hang out and move and bathe in the sea naked . We're also generally more open to nudity in a non-sexual but "this is just how my body is" way, even in some families it's totally fine to be naked in front of each other (in certain context, like after taking a shower while grabbing some new clothes or stuff like that, afaik not really running around the house naked all day). Considering this background I'm from it just blows my mind that someone would be this stuck up about someone else not waring a goddamn bra in their own home (plus as an afab person I haven't really worn any bras in almost 10 years, since I was 14, maybe 15? Only sports bras or bralettes on certain occasions or my binder)

[@thughyung]

maybe its just cause im aro, but i def dont believe kissing HAS to imply feelings at all. and the fact the guy was dumb enough to make out w his friend IN FRONT of everyone, to me anyway, reads that he was essentially blackout. obviously still not something he should have done, and the gf had every right to be upset about it, but it feels like, from what he shared at least, that he clearly regretted it and completely validated the gfs feelings about it too. i could understand the gf not wanting him and his friend to hang out alone anymore, or never bringing her to an event w her again, but cutting her out completely... idk?? i'd also be curious how his friend felt about it all. because if SHE had feelings for him, even it he didn't have them for her, that would also make the situation very different imo (i could more easily understand the gfs ultimatum in that case).

[@MireyaRivera]

I'm not aro, but I've even heard allo friends talk about wanting to make out or even have sex with people they don't want a relationship with. To be clear, not justifying his actions. What he did was still wrong since it seems clear they were in a monogamous, closed relationship. But I do agree that making out with someone doesn't equal wanting to be in a romantic relationship with that person.

[@nickronca1562]

Yeah, I was thinking the first guy wasn't an asshole. Yeah, being drunk doesn't justify his actions, sure, but I think it explains them. To me it sounded like he would have made out with anyone with how drunk he was. To me, it sounded like he could have made out with a dude even if he were straight with that much alcohol. I don't know, something about calling him the asshole (at least for the making out part) physically pains me, like I have a visceral reaction against it. And I understand the girlfriend's request for him to cut Kayla out of his life, but I also understand him not wanting to. It's a shitty situation were I can understand both perspectives, and even why he would be dumped over this, but definitely don't think he was being an asshole, (or even that he was actually cheating for that matter), cause like, don't you have to be conscious about what you're doing for it to seriously be considered cheating?

[@thughyung]

@@nickronca1562 yeah cause in my opinion, there's a reason why "consent" while under the influence is called DUBIOUS CONSENT. being intoxicated compromises your ability to coherently make sound choices and give proper consent!

[@tatertotnco]

you always give me gender envy, thinking about dyeing my hair like yours!! keep serving queen❤

[@HumbleWooper]

Anybody of any gender can look amazing with rainbow hair! Don't let your gender be the thing that stops you.

[@pinkgiraffe378]

This video was more intense than some of the AITAs. Idk whether I'm especially fired up today or something but wow these made me angry.

[@jadamiller7485]

"I don't want to cut her off because we were both drunk and not ourselves!" Ok, but will this happen if you get drunk again?

[@ImOnlyChasingSafety959]

I think its crazy how a lot of these issues arise because of failures to communicate effectively.

[@BuischuiCosplay]

sorry its a little funny how the word "hole" is censored in captions but not "ass" LOL

[@Werevampiwolf]

Weirdly, that's actually the standard for censoring the word, at least in America. Because the word "ass" is not censored on television but "asshole" is, so since the "hole" part is what's added, that's what gets censored. Which is so dumb but also hilarious

[@liabowden8526]

I assume it's because "ass" is another word for donkey. 🤷‍♀️

[@BuischuiCosplay]

sorry WHAT

[@SLYKM]

This is the second time I come across that first post on the internet, and I just remembered something like that happened to me in my first ship, there was some weird kissing with a friend while drunk. And I will say that probably ruined the ship, at least on my side, very slowly. We all want to let our partners keep their friends, and when you're young, you don't want to he the jealous one. All the younger folk reading this, please listen to your gut. If there are actual signs your partner has feelings for a friend, listen to it. I mean signs, not worries. Cutting off a friend that cheating happened with is more than reasonable since most would dump immediately. Unless they are willing to meet you where you are at so that you can trust them, you shouldnt stay with them. Whatever the reason or excuse, and even if they are really a good person, they dont have space to give you want you need to feel chosen and loved enough, and that isnt fair.

[@agentzapdos4960]

The second story is just proof that people from different socioeconomic backgrounds are incompatible on a fundamental level. The wealthier one will only ever resent the poorer one.

[@Zeffer32]

I think that could go both says but not as a rule, not all rich people are out-of-touch and think they're better, not all poor people are resentful of the fact they're not rich but yeah probably for the most part you're right

[@paulovitorsouzanunes4854]

No, the guy was just a rich little classicist shit

[@ttintagel]

I think it CAN work, but both people have to be super open-minded and willing to learn.

[@someonethereQ]

@@Zeffer32 im sorry this is so out of touch imo, comparing the status frustration the working class has to the classism caused by the rich believing they are "deserving" and superior to the poor is ridiculous.

[@Zeffer32]

@@someonethereQ I think you misread my comment? I wasn't comparing anything. I said some rich people may feel superior (not that they ARE, just some believe they are) but not all, and some poorer people may resent rich people for that, resent not being rich, but again not all. So those relationships may be doomed to fail if one or both believe that, but not as a rule. People can learn, grow, all that. Didnt say anything about comparing or causing anything 😅

[@emmell6285]

The first story totally took me back to my sweet 16 birthday party. I had a friend show up who was just cheated on so I went outside to console him. When we went back inside we walked in on my then boyfriend and best friend making out 😢

[@CalvinChikelue]

The elitist yacht bro from the second scenario is giving the awful antagonist love interest in a romcom who the MC realizes she shouldn’t be with.

[@pinkgiraffe378]

Judging people is very fun lol. I feel like people often post stuff on here to prove a point to whoever the other person in the situation was and end up proving the opposite point instead.

[@infjandcoping4614]

8 glasses of water would be way too many for one dinner. So would 8 sodas, 8 beers, 8 shots, 8 mixed drinks, or 8 coffees. I don't particularly care about the what part of the 8, or necessarily the price per each, but the fact that 8 were consumed... just wtf. Even if the dinner was 2 hours, and there was a bathroom break. 8 And if this was a work dinner, you would likely need to separate 7 of those drinks off the bill, because more than 1 or 2 would not be covered. So it is more ok to rob your gf than your work?

[@rosieg6989]

28:59 Not the asshole, the parents and brothers are assholes and sexist. Going to university is a big deal, and if the parents reward for successfully graduating it is to gift $50 000 to help buy a home that is great, and the daughter also managed to do so and yet did not receive the same aware. I see the later $50 000 as a delayed version of that reward she was owed. The parents were sexist for not giving it to her for graduation, and the brothers were sexist for not standing up for their sister at the time or in the present, like if my parents had done something like that to my younger siblings I would have been furious and stood by them through it all against our parents. As for the wedding, if you didn't invite them, they and anyone else they wished to bring are not intitled to be there. And for the money, if they very specifically said it was a gift, and didn't make you sign anything, then they can not legally go after you for using it for something other than what they hoped you use it for.

[@WalkingNeonCarpet]

this!! super weird to not give the award in equal to the daughter. glad she could get outta there

[@rosieg6989]

@@WalkingNeonCarpet Yes, she worked just as hard, and yet wasn’t given the same reward. And her brothers didn’t stick up for her either. It is so unfair.

[@kajielin4354]

I just read a book with a normal girl dating a super rich guy, but in that book even his shitty father complimented her sense of style even though it was obviously of a very different price class than everyone elses.

[@pinkgiraffe378]

Oooh I relate to the woman in the third one, I don't have two degrees, but I am studying geography at university and it really pisses me off when I'm talking about my assignments or something and someone starts telling me climate change isn't real, like please I can disprove that with sources. Sadly I don't have the confidence to stand up for myself like she did though, I admire that.

[@alyj6398]

Those parents are so ridiculous! Why would it be "the husband's responsibility" to provide a house for their daughter, but at the same time their own (those parents, that is) responsibility to provide a house for their adult sons?

[@hexonyou]

so wait... the guy ordered 8 drinks over the span of a meal together? Even if they sat around and extended it that would still be TOPS 2 hours of dining, that's a lot of alcohol to smash back to back especially assuming it's likely mixed drinks. That guy definitely has this comparative mentality where it's so transactional that to him it's just a matter of "well maybe she should ask for more on HER day then" but it's like... dude she's not upset that you got more than she did, she's upset because it's clear you laid on everything you could get with no regard to what she can comfortably afford. Sure you can have an agreement in place but an agreement is not this hard unyielding law of the lands, it's just a basic idea that can be tweaked depending on the situation- like you know, if you're going way overboard and she needs to scale back.

[@xXLavender_crowXx]

Yippe! Drama from people i dont knoe!

[@moonstar_draws6283]

As a fellow animal lover(referring to the wildlife biologist story), it’s very frustrating when people get things wrong about animals or imply they know more than you or other professionals. My grandfather is sexist and thinks he’s smarter than any girl, and he knows nothing about animals but claims he knows more than me just because I’m a girl

[@jossypoo]

Drinking birthday story: I find it BAFFLING when people try to pull one over on you to your face. Like, you're not smart because 'it was all paid for so it's fine', AND you're saying it TO HER FACE. Like, finding loopholes might work in some spheres, but the sheer audacity to try to take advantage of your partner' generosity/couple tradition is just jaw-dropping.

[@audreydoyle5268]

Hair is looking fresh as Hel, Sav! The warm tones really compliment your skin tone. That daddy's money boy needs a lesson from that bailiff from the Swan Princess. It's "hideous" cause it looks "cheap"? No sht, it looks bad to someone who's grown up around silk and organza! Also, those parents getting mad at their PROFESSIONAL daughter for standing up for herself with an "all due respect" tone, is mental. Reminds me of my own. For as long as they are living, you're forever a child (to them). It's not enough to prove diagnosis, but that's narcissist and enabler behaviour. Her mother triangulated her to make her see how his feelings were upset because she was being assertive about her literal expertise. I think her feelings were hurt more by the patronising tone he took reacting to her speak about something she has an actual degree in. I don't see the problem with relaxing and going braless in your space. And the bf was only "uncomfortable" cause he was getting mixed signals between his heads. That friend was just trying to humiliate them with the toy. It seems to be a running kink in certain men, cause they do it to every woman in their life. Always have to prank and "degrade" their female friends, because it gets their rocks off. It's disgusting and her response, not reaction, was entirely warranted. Also, her reaction may have been because of trauma, her hypersecuality may have been because of SA trauma. It was as uncouth as it was uncool.

[@sp00ky_synth]

Im always kinda sus of people who say "our relationship has been perfect until now, we've never gotten into a fight in 2 years !!" like, fighting at least a little is a normal and healthy part of coexisting with another human. if in a whole 2 year marriage y'all haven't fought at ALL ??? there's gotta be some communication issues, at least one person is just sucking it up and dealing with it not to mention that for that specific story he's like "oh yeah its been a great 2 years no fights" and then he asks nicely Once before blowing up and insulting her and something important to her ?????? he's either outright lying or hes got the emotional awareness of a grapefruit

[@emory644]

side note i love that shirt so much!!! every time you wear it in one of your videos it just makes me so happy bc it’s so pretty

[@WynnWynn-gl3fk]

I got a rainbow 🌈 pedicure today and I thought of you. ❤😊

[@aduckofsomesort]

Elopement story they didn’t actually elope. They went to the courthouse and the parents were there.

[@ShauntSerelu]

The wife also probably had insecurities with marrying into a richer family, so when her husband threw barbs directly into that insecurity it no doubt hurt way more than it normally would

[@mills3044]

Where do you get your clothes!!! I love them!!

[@pinkgiraffe378]

As someone who doesn't drink I especially understand that birthday dinner one, like drinking is so expected that people do expect you to pay for drinks even if you don't have any. I've been out for dinner before with people who order a bunch of drinks and I order none and then they want to just split the bill, like no. I'll pay for what I got.

[@lynternet]

your hair looks SO good!!

[@HoneyBoom]

do you think the parents in the second last post approve of their daughter having a bank account? perhaps even her voting? do they want her to quit her job because "her husband is supporting"?

[@Barakon]

5:45 The only way he won’t be the asshole is if he was assaulted & didn’t want to end the friendship with Kayla over it.