You're Not Helping Men, You're Just Taking Advantage of the Vulnerable Ones

We're continuing to look into the Masculine Revival Instagram account and looking at how a misogynist and fundie content creator is masquerading as just being a men's rights / self-help guru and why this is so dangerous.
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[@lindseystein9676]

Having a baby in the US is ridiculously expensive compared to other countries. Upon leaving the hospital, my husband & I had a $10k bill, and that was after what our health insurance covered. There wasn’t an emergency c-section or anything like that, it’s just expensive in general. That’s even just the birth, I’m not even getting into lack of parental leave, child care costs & college tuition.

[@RickReasonnz]

That's so sickening. Every parent is starting a mile behind the starting line. Honestly, I'm real glad I'm not in the US.

[@ksen333]

That's horrific

[@segue2ant395]

I'm sorry you went through that :( I can recommend health tourism, if travelling is ever an option in future. There are countries around the world with healthcare systems that are largely privatised and welcome US folks at what an American might consider astonishingly low rates, in return for what they would consider a cash-windfall - even in wealthier European nations. Most countries with socialised healthcare also have thriving private healthcare systems embedded - in the UK for example, it's quite common for there to be privatised wings in municipal hospitals. Socialised healthcare systems admittedly aren't great for some things - but they are INCREDIBLE for cost-effectiveness, accountability, and standards of outcomes - three things privatised healthcare are often terrible at - so paying to use privatised facilities in a socialised system can make a very nice balance.

[@edvh88]

What state do you live in? That’s horrible! I’m in MA and probably ended up paying around 1,500 for my delivery. Natural birth but I ended up hemorrhaging and needed surgery and blood transfusions. Thankfully we have decent insurance in Massachusetts.

[@MewLime]

@@justrandomthinker yes, we’d all love to marry a misogynistic pedo who’d kill us for daring to dress wrong. 😂 “religion of truth” more like religion of rapists and murderers. this channel is for making fun of fundie morons like you.

[@edvh88]

I think NOT having kids, when you DONT want them, is the best choice you could make. I love my child, I chose to have him, I did have access to choices, and I chose this. I love him more than anything. But it’s also a huge change. No one should become a parent unless they feel strongly that they really want to.

[@FeministCatLadySpinster]

Re: kids being expensive - most people want to give their kids more than what they had, not the bare minimum.

[@Maddie-qu3kp]

Funny, how he warns against co-habitating long term because you could discover you don't have values that align with someone and break up.... Yet him and others like him encourage people to get married extremely quickly and start pumping out babies immediately. When a legally binding marriage and children are involved, there is so much more pain (and money) involved in a separation. The alternative is lifelong unhappiness and risks to the mental health of everyone involved.

[@tatiana4050]

Not everyone involved. Women are supposed to shut up and do their roles. Although I guess most men would be unhappy to be with a woman who has sex with them just as her duty

[@Maddie-qu3kp]

@@tatiana4050 I think incels and most religious extremists would disagree with you there

[@UlexiteTVStoneLexite]

@@tatiana4050 roles are made up

[@tatiana4050]

@@Maddie-qu3kp yeah unfortunately

[@mirandarensberger6919]

Yes, so much this.

[@jfinney225]

thank you for saying "a relationship that ran it's course is not a failure". i was with my ex for over half my life. we were together 18 years before we split up and have one 13 year old son together. the most hurtful thing he ever said to me was that he felt he wasted the last 18 years of his life because the marriage didn't last. he actually said to me, "thanks a lot. at least you didn't waste 2 WHOLE decades." 😥 even though the relationship was toxic and unhealthy a lot of the time, and on both parts, for so many reasons, i still learned things about myself (good and bad), learned things about him (good and bad), learned how to better navigate my next relationship or marriage if and when there is one, got to know people i wouldn't have without the relationship, had experiences and made memories with him that i will cherish forever, and BEST OF ALL we have an incredible boy that wouldn't exist otherwise.

[@ZeLeninovoMasoveRizoto]

@MGTOW Indian Club no bitches?

[@dalailarose1596]

@MGTOW Indian Club Oh it's one of these sad little critters. Always good for a laugh.

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

Were you the instigator of the divorce?

[@manderly33]

I’m assuming “ten kids” guy here doesn’t even have a spouse yet. Love 2 hear a single man explain all about the kinds of relationships he has no experience with.

[@keebler9432]

I've seen more narcissists who wanted mini versions of themselves to worship their parenting and then they don't do anything they don't want to do to take care of their mini-me :( "I want ten to raise them with MY correct values" like ew

[@amberinthemist7912]

Later he'll be on the forums for parents who've been cut off from their adult kids whining about how great they were as parents. "I only told my son that my way of living was the only way to live and he wasn't a real man if he didn't have a stay at home wife who was pregnant constantly. Now he won't talk to me. I don't understand why he's so mean to me!!."

[@florianopolis6299]

@@amberinthemist7912 usually what you do see in those forums is your last sentence only. They never touch the reason behind that decision, because if they did, they'd find something they'd rather not look at: themselves.

[@MagisterialVoyager]

@@florianopolis6299 Exactly. Look up "Missing missing reason". I've been severely helped by others' experience of self-preoccupied, emotionally immature parents in relations to mine.

[@jfinney225]

well duh, it's because wamman raise up the babes in 'merica! 🤣

[@jfinney225]

@@MagisterialVoyager this [missing missing reason] is extremely interesting reading. thanks for sharing that resource!

[@Sicthewolf]

"Nothing worse than investing months and years to discover misaligned values" so the answer to that is leaping into a legally binding contract that might force people to stay in a bad relationship even more than spending that time? Somehow that makes more sense to him?

[@dogcathorsefish13]

I think the pair bonding rhetoric is particularly advantageous to misogynists / Christian misogynists because a woman/femme who has had more partners is likely more discerning and knowledgeable about healthy vs abusive behavior and compatibility with future partners. He has a vested interest in creating a world where his potential partners have less dating experience :)

[@delenaisrealbithes]

Holy shit! this!

[@noah8236]

Damn. Never thought about it like this. Although I don't think that this is an actual motive, yet nevertheless a disturbingly problematic dynamic in the context of this conservative/reacrionary world view. I honestly think that this guy, or at least most people like him, are really that delusional and think that the world is better and people (in this context especially women) happier this way. Not to say that they don't like how advantageous things are for them in they're world, but I'm not sure how much they are conscious about their own positive resonance to those advantages.

[@JordoMIB]

​@@mr.m6038 I'm pretty sure having a few partners before settling down with someone years later is way different than being a literal porn star.

[@JordoMIB]

@@mr.m6038 You're the only person to bring up that number, which if that how you feel is fine. Though I think it's a tad bit weird to prescribe your values onto others to that degree. Also it's insanely unlikely for someone to have a body count in the triple digits, much less quadruple. On average women and men have less than 7 partners their whole life.

[@jessicacharlton7347]

In some cultures, women were thought of as property in a lot of ways. If a woman had sex or had been raped, she was thought of as used good's. When it came time for a woman's father to sell her to her husband, she wasn't considered to be worth as much money if she'd been "used". Much like how a used car is worth less than a new one, even if the used car still functions like it's new and the interior is still perfect. They called it wedding dowry, but the act was straight up selling your daughter to a man. Wives were supposed to be treated better than other slaves, such as concubines, but they were still slaves who could be raped by their husbands at any time. Anyways, this is where the idea that a woman is worth less if she's had premarital sex, even if it was rape, came from.

[@Kotifilosofi]

I wanna see the 16 yo who can be fed by "giving a little bit from your plate" and is okay only ever wearing old clothes. No hobbies, no education, nothing, just the essentials you know. This dude is delusional claiming that having children is _not_ expensive.

[@laulau194]

For real, the baby stage might be doable quite cheaply, but that doesn't last!

[@mackereltabbie]

Adolescent boys definitely need more food than adults the same size. My slim 16 year old brother would eat a whole family sized pizza for lunch sometimes, and I remember several classmates eating a literal loaf of bread for lunch, washed down w/a litre of milk, after eating a plate size cinnamon bun as a snack every break - none of them were overweight, just growing and very active

[@annabeinglazy5580]

Also the old clothes STILL need to be bought. If it's your First Kid, you need to buy everything new (and i includes thrifting and charity Shopping in that). The second Kid, If you do it right, might be OK with Hand me Downs. my sister actively hoped for me to grow Out of my favorite pair of Jeans so she could have Hit (i guess thats a compliment to my Style haha). But the First Kid will be Hella expensive No Matter what you do cuz there isnt any precedent

[@julietfischer5056]

@@annabeinglazy5580- Same even if you have an extended family of siblings, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

[@cuckoophendula8211]

Just from seeing the title alone, and as a guy who's once been in the anti-sjw to alt-right pipeline and has since become a mental health advocate myself, I wanted to express how wholeheartedly I agree with that sentiment. While male specific mental issues are an actual thing, there has unfortunately been quite a market for grifters that not only take advantage of them, but have been fueling an agenda that's apparently quite antithetical to the golden rule (i.e. treating women with respect). Meanwhile, it just so happened that I saw an interesting video with a complementary topic entitled "analyzing the 'escape the matrix' self-help scam" by Kuncan Dastner. What's kind of scary about it as that once being a teenage male myself, I could see myself falling for some of their selling points.

[@zorro......]

looooove kuncan dastner's channel! and noah samsen. really good healthy man mentality content from the 2 of them :)

[@timvandeursen2687]

@@mezzb Please start this channel! Not only is it valuable to spread positive ideas around, it is especially so on a topic/section of the populus that gets overlooked alot in terms of mental health. Of course I can't decide for you what to do, but I hope you can be the change you want to see in this world. :)

[@cuckoophendula8211]

@@loganblackwood2922 Gosh, you went all off on me while I included an "i.e." the entire time. This means that it's just one example of how the golden rule can be implemented, which means it's not limited to just my stated example. Calm down, lol.

[@christopherbrown5409]

​@Cuckoo Phendula do you tell women to calm down?

[@christopherbrown5409]

​@Zorro what's healthy about Noah's disingenuousness?

[@tjfox2990]

Something that always stuck with me is when Barney and Robin (HIMYM) decided their marriage wasn’t working. Barney said something along the lines of “Think of it as a successful marriage that just happened to last 4 years.” It was delivered as a joke but genuinely made me view breakups in a whole new light.

[@metademetra]

As bad as that finale was, if Barney and Robin WERE real people, I probably would have said that they handled their divorce as well as adults could. They just knew it wouldn't work out, they distanced themselves from each other, and then years later, they were able to be cordial and friendly toward each other. Most marriages don't end half as amicably.

[@billyharper8780]

cope harder.

[@spiceupyourafterlife]

My partner and I have been living together for a little over three years now and I actually think this has made our relationship stronger (especially since pandemic) and to me, it’s proof that I do actually want to spend the rest of my life with him. Because I think if you’re going to marry someone, you better know what that means. You better know what living with them is actually like before diving in headfirst into a marriage. That’s why I get so annoyed with people who preach that couples who live together are just “playing house.” It’s so condescending and rude! Like, do you think we’re living under the same room for FREE?! Do you think living together doesn’t require any sort of dedication or hard work? P.S. We also have a dynamic where he’s the “house husband” while I work 9-5 because it suits our personal needs. He likes the spare time he gets from working part-time and I like the structure and stability of full-time work.

[@MagisterialVoyager]

Maybe these people never experience fulfilling cohabitation, or even relationship, themselves. I agree with you. It's imperative that I can actually live well with someone, healthily and doing both of our hard work to coexist in a living space, because I respect myself. Beside, jumping into marriage and then realising you don't like your partner's lifestyle would be awkward at best and disastrous at worst. It's like you don't plan well around something this important as an adult.

[@UlexiteTVStoneLexite]

My husband and I lived together for 4 years before we got married. we have been married for 13 years this year.

[@SSH0LE.]

exactly this. my boyfriend and i have been living together for almost 7 years now. he proposed a few years ago, but i don't really care to get married. it's SO annoying how people will speak about our relationship as if it's not serious since we're not married, when i've seen 4 marriages begin and end within the span of ours. we plan for the future assuming we will be together forever, and getting married wouldn't change anything. ridiculous. 🙄

[@Stormy177]

@@SSH0LE. Would it not confer any legal protections to the surviving partner if the other were to die? Property ownership, pension payouts, that sort of thing.

[@SSH0LE.]

@@Stormy177 no, because anything regarding money and property can be assigned through a trust. usually pensions and bank accounts will specifically ask for beneficiaries too. i've thought about this, and it's not a reason i'd get married for either. i always say when we decide to get married, we will elope.

[@nikitatavernitilitvynova]

My mom used to be a stay at home mom. Was she happy? Absolutely not! She resorted to watch all the famous movies, tv series she could find during the day, paint by numbers, cross stitch. It was so bad for her she offered my granddad (her father) to come stay with us since he was alone in Ukraine after his wife (my grandma) passed away 5 years prior. He was ecstatic as a retired man working for the secret military with a law degree. You'd think the opposite right? A man who worked in the military and had a law degree would be strict and not budge. Well he was the exact opposite of my mom. He would let me do anything. I wanted to blow bubbles indoor? He'd let me do it. Mom would complain about the soapy residue they leave. I wanted to cook something? He would let me try things. My mom would absolutely shut the kitchen. She was sad to leave me for work. Because I kept crying that I wanted her with me. But she couldn't stand being at home all day doing nothing productive. She wanted to go to work. She wanted to have a purpose in life other than her kids. And even if me and my brother are stupid and dumb idiots she still loves us. It's not like being a provider really turns you against your children.

[@AlphaStudios-lh1rz]

No one forced her to stay at home

[@nikitatavernitilitvynova]

@@AlphaStudios-lh1rz if she wasn't at home there was no-one who could take care of that idiot of my brother. And daycare was too much money.

[@AlphaStudios-lh1rz]

@@nikitatavernitilitvynova Sorry to hear, but feminism will never be a solution

[@nikitatavernitilitvynova]

@@AlphaStudios-lh1rz to you my dear. Not for me and the rest of millions of women who wouldn't dare touch you with a ten foot pole.

[@Oceanblue_Art_]

I think I'll just resign myself to being a narcissist, seems a lot cooler than whatever tf these people are espousing

[@carleybarnes4365]

I’m 27, on the asexual spectrum. I’m happy being single while still figuring out what I want.

[@edvh88]

You’re so young! Take your time and enjoy your life. That’s cool that you are ace. Wish I knew more about that as a youngster.

[@ouijacorn]

Same! I'm 30 and find I'm very happy going at my own pace. 🐢

[@Mandy87Marie]

I’m in a very similar situation at 35

[@Mandy87Marie]

@@loganblackwood2922 I don’t want them, so that is not a concern for me.

[@englishexpert1989]

@CHAOTIC GOOD - All western women are homosexual. It is normal

[@carlsonscottagefarm9355]

I was a young adult in the 80's. I wasn't um very picky about who I slept with (mainly because I was drunk and a SA survivor acting out) I do believe I hurt myself (I really needed therapy) however my husband would never say I harmed him. We have been married 32 years and we were wildly attracted to each other and still are. Also not every one is emotionally or mentally capable of raising kids ie all the childhood abuse victims. Ther is also no guarantee your kids will think or believe what you believe. I did not have kids so they could be mini me's, that's selfish and narcissistic! I had kids because I wanted to raise happy healthy kids who can be whatever they want to be. I was told once that selfishness is not doing what you want,but rather expecting others to do what you want.

[@thomaslawrence6353]

I dated a woman a for a while back in 2018. We got along really well. After a while she told me she found another man that she wanted to date. Most people in this situation would understandably be upset, but I wasn't. I told her I didn't mind and wished her well. We both determined that we didn't have any chemistry, but we got along really well and remained friends. I even befriended her new boyfriend. All of my 'friends' kept telling me that she's trash, and that she's a bitch for doing what she did, and that I was a simp for letting her 'letting her keep me as a male orbiter'. It doesn't register with a lot of people that just because a relationship doesn't work out, that it automatically means the other person (in this case the woman) is horrible. I have since cut ties with these 'friends' and I am still good friends with her.

[@trybunt]

I also think this attitude is far too common. I have family members who always make a villian out of the ex, which makes any split with children absolutely horrible for no reason at all. One ex was a reasonable guy, always making effort to be kind and do what was best for the child, and he is treated like shit from large parts of my family when he doesn't deserve it. I just make an effort to be friendly, and if anyone complains I just say that I'm not going to hold a grudge because a relationship didn't work out, what good does that do?

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

Why was she a b---h, when she was being open and honest with you? Did your friends prefer that she went behind your back and cheated on you? Thank goodness you were more mature and insightful than they were.

[@thomaslawrence6353]

@@trybunt I also think it depends on the situation. In most situations I think it is hard to not feel bitter towards the person who we're breaking up with. It sounds like in your situation (like mine) the breakup wasn't painful and no feelings were hurt and other people don't seem to understand how that could be, which for me was very frustrating.

[@trybunt]

@@thomaslawrence6353 sometimes I think I am a little too detched from my emotions, to be honest, but I've spent my life finding ways to take my own personal bias out of the equation as much as possible. I think that helps a lot dealing with these situations, and extending kindness and compassion to everyone, but it also makes me appear cold and unfeeling. Anyways, you aren't my therapist, haha, I just wish that less people would assume ex's are evil, or that anyone we disagree with must have evil intentions. I genuinely feel like these cognitive biases cause harm throughout the world, from kids refusing to speak with parents based on the other parents account, to loved ones holding grudges with each other over their different perspectives of situations, all the way up to people holding groups accountable for some perceived hidden evil motivation. Generally, I think we speculate about others motivations, and judge them based on this speculation which causes harm all the time

[@KateeAngel]

Doubt this guy can raise even one child "right"

[@RickReasonnz]

Thing is, they don't even want to raise up their own kids; they see that as women's work!

[@rhokesh4391]

I wouldn't leave homie alone with a tamagotchi

[@gypsydonovan]

I am in a committed relationship. We’ve been together for 15 years last month. We discussed our values & hopes for the future early on, as he seems to recommend before marriage. There are no surprises of finding out he doesn’t want the same things in life because just like any other couple, we TALKED about it. Yes, I’ve invested a lot of time but I sincerely don’t understand why that is more likely to hold me to him than if we’d married 10 years ago. It’s actually easier to walk away because there’s no paperwork to file. I’m not playing house, I’m living in the house & household we’ve built together over years of ups & downs. I’m very happy with our life together. Every Dec 14, we ask each other “are you in for another year?”. I’m not seeing how the relationship differs in daily life. We are committed to each other. We’re honest & have good communication. We’ve never had an argument last more than an hour & we’ve never had what I would consider a fight. No break up or cheating or drama. Just building our life & supporting each other. I’d really like a breakdown of what would be different if we were married.

[@ZinniaGulden]

Im 23 and I’ve been really struggling with my decision to become a parent. I was abused by my parents so I have a very strong fear that I will be a bad parent. On the flip side, I value family very much. I didn’t know what true love was growing up. I desperately want to feel what it’s like to come home to a house filled with people who feel loved, happy and secure. Id never take it for granted. It would heal parts of my childhood that I don’t think could be healed if I didn’t have children. Then I think of the state of the world and honestly I just have zero hope for the future. I feel selfish bringing a child into a world that I don’t even have hope for. This shit is so complicated.

[@zorro......]

this is just my own 2 cents, so take it with a grain of salt as it comes from a stranger online who knows nothing about you! I genuinely think that having children is not going to heal childhood trauma. in fact, in my experience, adding on new stressors that i have never encountered prior (like all the trials that come with parenthood, for example) have without fail brought my childhood trauma symptoms back to the surface again. For example, as a student, when things got stressful, the first few symptoms of poorly managed childhood trauma started to show up. when i finally manage it and learn to deal with those symptoms within the context of school, i was doing okay. when my life stage changed and i started heavily doing volunteer work, new symptoms of trauma surfaced and i would find out (with help from my therapist) that it had the same root causes, I just had learnt to deal with the set of symptoms that arose while i was a student. Now that i have started working, the same thing has happened. All of this is to say, please do not have kids in hopes that they will heal you. More likely than not, I feel it's common for new and different life stages to trigger you in new ways that you haven't learnt to cope with. And if you are having children in hopes that they heal you, that's putting a really high expectation on yourself and on the children who have yet to exist. what if they have a really, really difficult to handle temperament, and it triggers your childhood trauma memories back to the surface. how will you proceed to handle that? in general I think it's still more than okay to have a child and want to give children the childhood you couldn't have. I also would be really cautious in saying or thinking that they might heal something that otherwise cant be healed - because what if they dont? because what if they bring out more of the buried pain? and at the end of the day, your kids will be their own people - not there for the purpose of your healing, but for the purpose of living their own meaningful lives.

[@ZinniaGulden]

@@zorro...... What’s healing for someone’s childhood trauma isn’t up for debate. Something can be difficult and challenging and healing at the same time. Life isn’t black and white.

[@ZinniaGulden]

@MGTOW Indian Club are you that misogynistic that you have to trash feminism under a comment that wasn’t even about feminism? Go find a hobby

[@edvh88]

@@ZinniaGuldenlife isn’t black and white, hence everything is up for debate. Also, what a risk to take- since you won’t know if it is “healing” til you make a child and get to find out the hard way. You’re so young, take the time to heal yourself and get into a position where you can support a child and ENJOY the experience. Find a partner you adore, who adores you, and enjoy life just the 2 of you for awhile. Get to know each other. Set your life up. Then when you’re ready to welcome a child, go for it. I have a 2 year old, kids are super challenging and they deserve our best. Not an expectation of them to heal you. Sometimes you need to mother yourself for healing.

[@edvh88]

@@zorro......exactly, it’s a recipe for at best some really resentful kids, and at worst it ruins all of their lives. Kids don’t have a choice to be born. Let’s respect them and be as ready as we can for them, mentally, emotionally, and stability wise.

[@lizanna6390]

It surprises me that there are still people who think women should be the ones staying homes with babies. My grandfather was a stay at home Dad and my nana worked and he never got flack for it despite the fact that he was the only one he knew back then.

[@UlexiteTVStoneLexite]

Lol my husband and I have a great relationship. better than anyting this tool will ever have. We both work and we don't have kids. We are very happy and we have a very good relationship.

[@WerstoftheWorst]

"A very good" singular

[@UlexiteTVStoneLexite]

@@WerstoftheWorst ops

[@evelyncolon5497]

He literally just made a post about how he’s “hurt his wife during moments of unfaithfulness” and how he’s “struggled with lust.” So yeah, I’m sure you do

[@twiggledowntown3564]

Your picture with the emu is really cool!

[@UlexiteTVStoneLexite]

@@twiggledowntown3564 thanks. It's a Bitmoji

[@user-wn4mq5gj6m]

Annoyed at KZbin, did not notify me or recommend this video even when all notifications are on and I watch all of Rachel’s videos. So glad I happened to check because I was bored. Love Rachel’s videos and always want more!

[@silverblood9456]

"Embrace common sense, reject cultural lies" might be the most ironic sentence, coming from someone who fully bought into the cultural lie of heteronormativity and patriarchy.

[@WerstoftheWorst]

I'll be honest, I have never met a couple under 30 where they can even afford for one of them not to have a job. Not saying it can't and doesn't happen, I just haven't seen it myself

[@jessicaharrison4719]

I started staying home with my oldest right before I turned 27, and it required a ton of strict budgeting and a room mate and a low mortgage since we bought a foreclosure from the bank. In other words, it took just about every factor being perfect for it to work for us. But it was possible for us.

[@SpaceOcelot4548]

I hate whenever they say “you’ll hurt your future husband,” as if I’d ever marry someone who would have a problem with my past if I had one. I’m someone who is monogamous but it is frustrating to me that people feel so entitled to criticize people for what they choose to do with their own bodies consensually. It is gross & embarrassing. Love your videos!

[@SnakeMan448]

The worst thing is that gurus like them likely know better, but are such misanthropes that they will push this false information for money, influence and a perpetual market.

[@jinnsiomega2329]

I'm so angry with the whole "you're hurting your future spouse by having sex" premise... Like I had a boyfriend, where he viewed me as "broken" becouse of the fact that I had sex in my previous relationship (by the way, that sex was not something I wanted at that time, I was pretty much pressured into having sex). He always said, that I should be virgin before I met him, because we were meant to be together, so it's okay to sleep with him, but I should have been "pure"... Yeah right, then he cheated on me so the whole thing went out of the window... Now, my long-term partner just doesn't care what I was doing before him. It is the healthiest relationship I have ever been in... So yeah, I wasn't hurting them.

[@mikelpelaez]

What a disgusting being that guy was

[@jessicacharlton7347]

​@@loganblackwood2922 He would've cheated whether he'd been her first or not. Toxic/abusive people have a talent for finding things we're ashamed of and using them against us. Had this guy been her first, he'd have found a different reason to try and make her feel inadequate. He still would've cheated as well.

[@patriciabradnorismakingpudding]

women sleep around and this is disgusting. do these hook-up culture 'feminist' empowered women even know what true love and femininity is anymore? they don't, they are just career driven, overworked and over ambitious in the work sector, whilst they then go around clubbing and sleeping with many men. low standard hook up culture men sleep with low standard hook up culture women. To find a gentleman, a woman must be pure in her heart. gentlemen and higher class men don't want slags. Just like high class women don't want low quality, disrespecting, cheating and vulgar men. if young women stopped acting and dressing like slags then they would attract gentlemen. hook up culture, men are disgusting and arrogant because of the modern secual revolution. the sl@ggish dressing of women is just so degrading and yet so widespread in our progressive society (i say its digressive) what kind of life is this? i ask these women... is this how you want to be acting before you have children? how do you expect your future children to respect you if you were acting so disgracefully in your youth?? what kind of role model would you be? there are many "modern" young women who dress up with cheap clothing, too much face paint and quite clearly like harlots. How are these women going to become good quality mothers?? they are disregarding their own pure feminine energy. love is pure and beautiful thing, and should never be treated as a casual date or a one nigh stand. The hook-up culture women who believe in modern dating are not in touch with there own divine femininity. modern women are pushing themselves physically to take on overly demanding work schedules, and also partaking in slag culture in their way of dressing and dating. this is bad combination. in order to have a pure loving bond with a good man, women need to become pure again. the mother will be the biggest influence on the child. therefore a responsible and innocent (incorruptible) women will not disrespect and degrade her spirit . on a side note- birth control is so common now and this is harmful to reproductive health. the pill shrinks the ovaries over long usage and causes cancer. having sex with men other than your true love or husband is bad. intercourse should be kept sacred between husband and wife.

[@adm2399]

@@jessicacharlton7347 He wouldn't; stop justifying this debauchery of sleeping around before marriage...be it man or woman. As for us; we don't want our kids to face there mother was a hoe before marriage.

[@jessicacharlton7347]

@@adm2399 If someone truly cared so much about their first partner being a virgin, why would they start a relationship with someone they knew wasn't a virgin? Also, why would he have pressured her into having premarital sex if he was so against this kind of behavior? You are being hypocritical for defending this guy who bitched and moaned about the fact that his girlfriend wasn't a virgin, only to cheat on her later. You are defending the exact kind of "debauchery" in this guy that you were just telling me not to defend. If you want to wait until marriage before you have sex, and only marry someone who has done the same, then go ahead and do that. I won't try and stop you or say anything about it. However, if you date a person who you know isn't a virgin and pressure them into having premarital sex with you, all while bitching and moaning about the fact that you weren't their first, then, later on, you decide to cheat on them, that makes you a hypocrite and a piece of shit and you deserve to be called out. This is exactly what this guy you are defending did.

[@carameldare]

My favorite part of those "babies aren't expensive" posts is that they don't seem to realize babies turn into kids and teens. Who need their own dinners and bigger clothes that will be expensive even if you make them yourself and, and, and, and, BEING A HUMAN IS EXPENSIVE

[@francescosantambrogio6421]

Brendan Shmidt and "alpha males": Men should rule families and Households! Italian Grandmas and Mothers: Are we a Joke to you!!??

[@francescosantambrogio6421]

@@loganblackwood2922 They do, but I can tell you that that doesn't prevent them from being the ones who give orders to all the others in the house...

[@W-I463]

@@loganblackwood2922 and whats that gotta do with "ruling"

[@cremeuxkraft9019]

As I was walking into an art store to buy myself a lil treat today, I saw a woman lose her shit on her kid. I see validation in my choices everyday. Lol

[@edvh88]

Kids are exhausting. I don’t regret it, but I do frequently remind myself “I CHOSE this” when my 2 year old is demanding all the attention.

[@christopherbrown5409]

I saw it just 30 minutes ago lol; it was a woman with multiple whining kids in Sheetz

[@c00lsteve]

fully agree with you, not sure if it's me but there appears to be an increase in misogynists like this these days, spout complete rubbish and lies but have lots of followers. Just a heads up - sooner or later his fanboys will show up and start doing false videos about you etc - if lucky he might do one himself lol. try not to rise to their bs.

[@Lauren_P_]

Even with good health insurance in the US all healthcare is ridiculously expensive. Babies are VERY expensive. Even if you save up for your THOUSANDS of dollars of cost for a regular hospital birth with no issues, you can’t depend on that. I got sick last summer and couldn’t keep down enough fluids to stop for getting very dehydrated, plus it was extremely hot outside. I went to the ER and had an IV of fluids and some routine tests for flu and Covid, all negative. With my excellent insurance, my part of the bill was over a thousand dollars. With every child you need to expect you will have one ER visit every so often. With every child you need to expect you will have additional expenses for housing, where I live, housing in good school districts is extremely expensive. With every child you need to expect food bills to change. My child has food texture issues. I had to completely change the way I fed her and the way I cook, so that she could gain adequate weight, people have changing medical needs over time and food prices are different in different parts of the world. Where I live, fruits, vegetables , and raw meat is more expensive than prepackaged food, and some of it is more expensive than fast food. Kids grow at an unexpected rate. I can’t count how many times I have handed my child relatively new clothes (a month or so old) or brand new shoes and they no longer fit. Even buying clothes a size or two too big, or on clearance doesn’t work out that well a lot of the time. These are not costs I see people talking about with children. It’s not just formula and diapers. That’s super expensive too, but it’s not just that.

[@cedar5616]

“Women are wired to be home makers!” ( I do not do the dishes )

[@laulau194]

Based on my home then I am not, in fact, a woman, despite all evidence to the contrary

[@ardenalexa94]

@@loganblackwood2922 she’s being sarcastic.

[@lolaartemis]

I also do not do the dishes, while my boyfriend washes the dishes 99% of the time. The other 1% of the time, it's my son.

[@karayanna8119]

I was raised by a single mother with my brother and I'd argue hes still a man now. Pretty sure he would too.

[@Mads_L_M]

Ok but the idea of someone saying,”you’re narcissistic if you want kids. You should 100% just have kids instead,” is wild, like if you (incorrectly) think someone is a narcissist why would you want them to have kids that, mind you, they don’t want, and like not wanting kids and then being made to have them against your own wishes, and narcissism are both things that increase the risk of abuse

[@eyalguz6303]

"I don't want kids" is a good enough reason to not have kids.

[@isaacbenrubi9613]

That's the thing about the phrase "I'm not XYZ-ist, but..." When someone says that, you know they're about to say something XYZ-ist.

[@angelmaureir429]

Lovely video as always! Thank you for (once again, because some people really don’t seem to listen) calling out that prairie wolf study

[@Ashbrash1998]

Reminds me of the Twitter thread saying that men with multiple partners have their member squeezed into a tiny string from all the baby cannon muscles. Making them unable to please any women they get with.

[@Ashbrash1998]

@mgtowindianclub5273Same can go for the men, how can they ever be expected to please their wives the same way they did the ones before.

[@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogether]

I saw your last video and found your points so interesting I immediately subscribed! We share many of the same beliefs and you word things much better than most. I’ve been binging your channel most of yesterday and your videos are great!

[@vaness8996]

Thank you so much for these videos, Rachel!!❤️ Whenever I stumble upon a person spreading these terrible ideologies online, I feel so damn sad and discouraged and disappointed. It really helps then to hear someone refute it in a kind and rational manner - reminds me that these (usually) men and their harmful ideas don’t actually have any power over us, even if they wish to do. You’re doing an amazing job🥰

[@imjustthisgirlok]

It's funny that he actually acknowledges people saying babies are expensive (even if just to refute it) and stick with the idea that one income can support multiple kids. Fundies like Girl Defined always seem to take it as a given that everyone should be able to live this way; literally I know NO ONE in my generation who can support a stay-at-home parent and kid(s) on just one income. And I think there are plenty of parents who would LOVE that setup if possible but pretending kids aren't expensive is just so out of touch with reality and makes me think this guy is either independently wealthy and/or does not deal with the family finances

[@logifontanus7408]

As a young aroace person , I always really appreciate it when you bring up people that don’t want sex or relationships so casually. It’s something that I rarely see being talked about outside of aroace-spaces so it’s really nice :)

[@liamodonovan6610]

You are an amazing woman rachel what gives him the right to say what is right every couple live exactly how he thinks is the right and only right way to live. Saying childfree people are selfish. You can't be be selfish to someone or something that doesn't exist he sounds judgemental and narcissistic awesome intelligent video. Always enjoy your videos

[@MaidenLiberty]

Rachel, you gotta make a video on the Fresh and Fit podcast. These guys are cringe and something for you to work with.

[@tetsubo57]

It's quite probable that he believes this dreck. Mostly though I figure he's just trolling for reaction comments. Every comment, supportive or oppositional, drives the Instagram algorithms. The more hate he spews, the more folks will comment and the more 'clout' he garners.

[@edvh88]

3:40: BABIES ARE EXPENSIVE BECAUSE YOU STOP WORKING!!!!!! Or work less! That’s been my biggest income loss- I work about 16 hours a week, I used to work over 45 hours a week. My child’s needs aren’t expensive in and of themselves. It’s the fact that I now don’t work as much. Basically, babies aren’t expensive, they just make you more broke.

[@edvh88]

I also use cloth diapers and we are still breast feeding at 2 years. It does save money but the biggest “cost” is still my lost income.

[@trixjoyce]

You don't help anyone by putting down someone else. That's not called "helping". Like this guy, trying to "help" men by putting down women (and a few men on the go). This makes me honestly so mad, and it's admirable that you can go through reading all of these for content. I could not do it, I just spend time here to see you make the conversion for the better. Thank you for shedding light on these issues with some men trying to "help other men" but just doing more harm than good. Thanks for a great video, as always!

[@trixjoyce]

@mgtowindianclub5273 as long as men being rapists and disgusting to women I’m going to speak up about it. One in four women has been assaulted and you don’t see that in men’s statistics. These men are DANGEROUS while women “dating coaches” or motivational speakers aren’t near as damaging! So please , if you decide to be a so called “mgtow” go your own way with the longest distance to all women as possible. Your kind of thinking are why men are dangerous. You just prove the point! And I’m saying this as an feminist/equalitarian that cares about men as well! The men that people like you call weak and mock for not being “manly enough”. I’m so done with men like you. Lock yourself up somewhere….

[@trixjoyce]

@mgtowindianclub5273 that’s not even true. Go and read a book.

[@MagisterialVoyager]

I don't know if I'm just so very different with this man or he's just, at least largely, insane in his way of thinking. Like, bruh, WHAT. Gosh, thank you for this video and opening a discussion on how messed up this is.

[@Maddie-qu3kp]

Me and my puppy say hi!! ☺️

[@nanablooms]

Great episode, thank you!

[@GabeNode21]

So much of his rhetoric seems to be veering towards climate change denial. Also so funny how he's like "modern society is so selfish and narcissistic" while at the same time saying that it's stupid to agree with "woke" ideas like... Working collectively to help others and the environment. The exact opposite of selfishness and narcissism.

[@eggybaconbits]

I love it when we get a chance to bring up the prarie vole study when people like this guy mention pair bonding. It just gives me such a laugh that they have no idea what they're talking about

[@GabeNode21]

@@loganblackwood2922 the fact that it's 1) exactly one study, 2) from 40 years ago, 3) on prairie voles who have vastly different brain and social structures to humans and 4) with no reference to any other research done in this area. It's just bad science to take that study and start making these huge unevidenced claims about human relationships.

[@Ireallywouldrathernot]

That print on your top, I love it. Very 70s.

[@joshuabird]

I love your hair colour 🥰

[@PigglePigSwillbucket]

Off topic but I loved the short videos you recently released on fungi!

[@PidgeyHowler]

It gets so exhausting having phobic people see my boyfriend and I as a straight couple because I'm transmasc and he's a cis man. Seeing trans inclusive cis creators makes me so happy. One day I'll transition physically and not fail to pass constantly. One day.

[@masuka1993]

pardon my ignorance, but w t f is a cis man??

[@pi172]

@@masuka1993 you can google that, little troll

[@PidgeyHowler]

@@masuka1993 I have a feeling you're a troll, but just for the sake of information, one who is assigned male at birth and basically goes "Yes, I agree with that." I mean, I'm being a bit playful with my explanation, but the point still translates.

[@masuka1993]

@@PidgeyHowler appreciate the explanation. Also i'm sorry you have to assume everybody on the internet is a troll. I've seen the term thrown in the comment section lately but had no idea what it meant

[@PidgeyHowler]

@@masuka1993 Well, in that case, I am genuinely glad I could inform. I apologize about the mild defensiveness, but I'm sure you've been on the internet long enough to see how members of the LGBTQ community are often spoken to.

[@i.7525]

love the asexual inclusivity in your videos as always

[@givemeprimelaughter]

Multi-generational legacies? What IS this ?? The Sims 4?!

[@Mark.OnEarth]

Great video, keep going. I started my channel from scratch uploading what I enjoyed, and now I am almost at 10k subs.

[@celeste3100]

What has made me not want children even more when men tell me I better have at least one before it’s too late 😤 I’m like bitch!! I’m 40 and I’m not trying to date right now. I’m trying to get my life together. I probably won’t be ready until I’m in my mid 50’s. Some men are just so 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ just because you’re in an unhappy marriage because you felt pressured to marry the woman you knocked up is not my fault. So now you want me to join that club. Nuuuu thanks!!! I’m looking to getting a hysterectomy at 45 if I can afford it.

[@dakotamabry1645]

Woman went into prostitution to take care of their children due to lack of job options / or low pay they recieved . Don't undestimate the depraved debts they'd go through to care for their kids , breastfeeding is incredibly hard , theirs a schedule you have to keep and even being home means every little time you have is breastfeeding and pumping - that's not included cleaning the house , healing , appointments etc . These men think that woman just make babies just to get away from work, I work way harder raising my child then I do at my actual job .

[@dakotamabry1645]

@mgtowindianclub5273 oh thats a misogynistic comment , you clearly missed the point of what I said . Despite all societal limitations woman found a way to take care of their kids, that includes depraved acts like prostitution

[@dakotamabry1645]

@mgtowindianclub5273 I assume your a dude , but you literally have no clue about what woman struggle with or go through and what you believe is a benefit to us really isn't., in fact I think I actually spoke with you before - you actually go on this channel quoting the manosphere like it's gospel and have a narrow minded view point

[@dakotamabry1645]

@mgtowindianclub5273 prime example I go on about how I struggle with mother hood and you say society is on my side and I live on easy street is down right insulting , sick of men who think they know my struggle and experience more then I do , entitlement

[@dakotamabry1645]

@mgtowindianclub5273 1 in 4 woman who have one pregnancy is homeless or goes homeless , that's just pregnancy. Plus patriarchy does exist and bennifets men but also hurts them , it's men that create problems for other men but you fail to mention that .

[@danielcrafter9349]

@mgtowindianclub5273 - "I don't know what I'm talking about, but I'll correct you anyways"

[@Night_Bacon]

Straight from the get go and its a no regarding this man the provider crap. In hunting and gathering systems that are thought to resemble our evolutionary background, women provide a large amount of the gathered food - nuts, berries, tubers, mushrooms, small game. Men might do the hunting, but they only return large, one off deliveries of meat. One suspects that women decided it would be best to send the men off on a hunt while they got on with the important stuff……😊

[@danielcrafter9349]

Also, in many cultures men would also craft, chop trees, cook or other activities... even our early ancestors and in tribal societies men had a more-or-less equal standing to women In Viking society, women not only managed the household but also controlled all the finances as well It's literally only societies that have been influenced by partriarchal Christian values - such as the Massai - where the power dynamics between men and women is unbalanced!

[@Scrinwaipwr]

11:53 I'm a very sexual person and so I need to find my partner sexy or else they may as well just be my friend. Call me shallow if you want, I don't care. I'm not unreasonably fussy about looks etc, I just can't partner up with someone no matter what they look or smell like like.

[@jeffengel2607]

Hey, maybe these guys have a large prairie vole audience and they're not actually speaking to the humans.

[@Jw-un8oh]

I dont want children but I feel compelled to adopt. I just cant help it.

[@Itri_Vega]

I'm aroace but if I was in a relationship the only thing related to previous partners I'd care about is whether my partner has any trauma that leads to limits (e.g. hating being touched from behind). And even then I would not be entitled to them telling me about it when they aren't ready - making sure they feel safe enough to disclose this is my job. Also children are so expensive I would slip below the poverty line if I had one. I don't like them, though, and I much prefer being in a position where I can save up for the things I want. I don't see a point in reproducing anyways when we are at a whopping eight billion.

[@NovemberOrWhatever]

His post formatting is so lazy and he doesn't seem to care at all about adapting his work to the medium of Instagram. His beliefs are certainly the more important issue, but that one does kinda annoy me. His grammar is pretty good in his tweets, so he clearly puts some effort into it, but I really don't think that putting a tweet over some stock photos of nature is all that nice, especially when he doesn't bother to do anything more than center the tweet in the middle of it all. Since it's always a square, it looks ugly with short tweets.

[@treasurerose6732]

Great video and break down

[@lydiapinnell1124]

Y’all Brandon blocked me on both my instagram accounts after I commented 💀💀 he really folded. He couldn’t have ignored me lmaoooo

[@Iceberg6606]

Rachel, you'd be a far more responsible parent than he would ever be, yet I do completely respect and support your choice not to have children. I hope you convince people who want to be parents to share your perspectives.

[@Iceberg6606]

@@loganblackwood2922, if you don't think someone who is sensitive to slanderous or hurtful comments is not capable of being a good parent, then perhaps you are incapable of being a good parent.

[@Artemis513]

oh shit i didnt realize i got here so early. i havent refreshed the page since i started but im 11 minutes in now and i apparently got here one minute after it was posted sick

[@richard8176]

I think he’s probably The Transformed Wife’s son and goes to the same church. He’s got a view of the world that works for him and thinks others need to know about it. Personally I don’t.

[@bomberbaja111]

What can I say... Another reason to not make a Twitter account. Or Tinder for that matter 😑

[@GrayTimber]

We should just invent a time machine and send these guys back to the 50s already

[@GrayTimber]

"Women don't like to be providers." Say that to the girlfriends and wives who post videos of then surprising their boyfriends/husbands with the gifts the men were wanting for years I'm pretty sure these women are happy to provide

[@RickReasonnz]

@@GrayTimber Say that to the solo mothers that work their ASS off at jobs everyone hates just to support their kids who would suffer without them.

[@SwanofWar]

Leaving a comment just to hopefully help you with rent lol. Love ya and your videos as always.

[@merbst]

this guy's misuse of the word "narcissism", his phobia of a "anti-natalist" straw-man, his hatred of veganism, and several other of his talking points are all taken directly from Jordan Peterson's pseudo-philosophy!

[@zoutwaterplantje4941]

great video

[@biseragjurovska1998]

Great vid as always!

[@TimEssDub]

What kind of dressing does the guy like with his word salad?

[@RealDanLivesay]

Two things we can count on in a Rachel Oates video: "my tummy is rumbling, I'm quite hungry;" and random Kyra grumbles. Never never change.

[@RachelOates]

I didn’t even realise it was that common! 😂 work first, eat after - I’m terrible!

[@Scatscar1985]

Is Brendan an Abigail Roth (i.e. Classically Abby) fan?

[@MarteTheArtist]

Hello! I just wanted to pop in and say that it would be really interesting to see a book review from one of Onision's books :-) If you don't know, he is one of the older KZbinrs who used to have a really big fan base, but recently is facing charges for sexual assault. His videos are mainly based on rating teenagers bodies on a scale from one to ten, eww! 🤮 It would be interesting to see a video on him or one of his books 😅 Anyways, I love your videos, thank you for being who you are ❤ xx

[@samwindmill8264]

Oh god, another "traditional masculinist influencer guru cult leader"

[@mjg4936]

*Andrew Tate has entered the chat*

[@dldietz82]

Please stop referring to this person as a man, he's a baby, plain and simple. Also, yes the pair bond argument is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. My wife and I have been with at least 100 partners between us and our connection to one another is stronger than all of those partners combined.

[@ohkaylalala]

Maybe hes mad @ vegans bc one broke his 💔 (ps that voice you do makes me laugh every time)

[@Emanuel_carey]

Baby girl was born in December last year. 25,000-ish dollars. That’s a base model Honda in the 90’s

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

Yikes!

[@annabeinglazy5580]

Lol He obviously has never Met me, or He would quickly Change His assumption that women are ideal homemakers.

[@roreo1612]

@MGTOW Indian Club I knew one of you can’t help but stalk. Go your own way already

[@danielcrafter9349]

@mgtowindianclub5273 - projection by any other name...

[@evelyncolon5497]

@MGTOW Indian Club Dude it could just be someone who isn’t good at cooking or is really disorganized…why do you assume that just because someone isn’t good at homemaking or tasks associated with homemaking that they must be homebreaking 🙄 or it could just be someone that wants to keep to themselves and not make a home to begin with.

[@evelyncolon5497]

@MGTOW Indian Club Lots of women work from home, or they work outside of the home. Also, a lot of women become very disorganized once they have children because they need to answer to their every need. They can’t just set aside 2 hours for cleaning when they have toddlers. Doesn’t mean they’re “breaking” homes. Do you think the only productive things a woman can do lie in homemaking? I think women CAN do those things and should if they want to, but they can do other things, too. It’s not a binary of “be a housewife” or “cheat.” That’s just a false dichotomy.

[@mstly4lg]

I thought this was the same game who had (has?) the LAWHF youtube channel. Lol, they look the same

[@meander112]

Engagement for the engagement god!

[@2020-p2z]

I'm not getting married. Marriage has never been between one man and one woman, or one person and another person. It has always been between one man, one woman, and the church, or two people, and the church/state. I am in a long term relationship, but we are never getting married. We don't want or need the government or the church to sanction our relationship.

[@danielcrafter9349]

Wow, that's massively wrong an uniformed Thanks for outing yourself like this, tho

[@tetsubo57]

You've got spambots impersonating you in your comments. I reported them.

[@cennethadameveson3715]

My Great Aunt and her husband, devout Christians never had children. At some time they must have decided maybe, because he was blind they had children. What They did do was as well as me and my sister and all our cousins, we never wanted for shoes, school uniforms or our parents missed a rent payment. Also 160years ago another branch of the family a childless marriage looked after numerous family members. I take from this how generous these people were as "christian folk" but their kindness was worth nothing because they had no children.

[@BoinkadelicJones]

I am an antinatalist, and part of the reason I am is that I came to the conclusion that having a kid is one of the most selfish things you can do. This dude needs to stop

[@chaoslab]

Thank you for including asexual people.

[@erin1569]

I hate that I thought this guy was Kevin form CallMeKevin

[@maggieshakalaka]

I almost didn't click on this video because the thumbnail looks so much like a sponsored post for these "get rich now with my free seminar" scams. Sorry, but that might be important for you to know if I'm not the only one.