My Husband Won't Follow Through With His Goals (Is That a Red Flag?)

My Husband Won't Follow Through With His Goals (Is That a Red Flag?)
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[@mrs.carter5524]

That first call almost made me cry when she said he just wants to be home with his family. Girl, so many women wish their husbands wanted to be home. It’s not like he’s not working at all. I get it, I’m very ambitious too but let him figure out what he wants to do and just enjoy having a great man! You go get the $100k job if that’s the life you want. 🙄

[@mrs.carter5524]

@Marten Dekker thank you!!

[@judymartin3148]

A to the men.

[@ne9835]

Yup.

[@imveryhungry112]

We all take what we have for granted until it's gone :(

[@Joe-jc5ol]

Money is way too overrated. A beautiful, healthy family where kids grow up with love. That's where the wealth is.

[@Jane_1994]

"He lacks drive" "What does he do?" "He's a full-time student and a full-time worker." Miss...excuse me?

[@anneshirley9560]

Geez, I thought he was a bum until I heard that. Maybe he’s not always meeting his goals because he’s just tired. I have goals that I meet, but sometimes they may take a little longer because I’m just plain tired. I would not want someone trying to pressure and guilt me to meet my goals. I’d tell her to back off. They’re mine, not hers!

[@censormedaddy]

Yeah I immediately loled when she said that.

[@thilgu]

This is basically the US American female in a nutshell. Never enough. Never good enough. Never rich enough. Never fit enough.

[@tobyfitzpatrick565]

@@thilgu Awww. That's not true. Some of us would love a man like hers in a heartbeat. He sounds great to me.

[@CammieKN]

And great father to the kids!

[@moxythepirate1281]

The more I hear some of these calls, the more I'm glad I'm unmarried and single.

[@emmagillette2323]

The more I hear these calls, the more I'm grateful for my happy marriage!

[@moxythepirate1281]

@@emmagillette2323 well said friend. It's good to hear that there are some people that make it work.

[@razmiddle9410]

That's like saying that working at the burn ward has made you more and more happy that you don't have a gas stove. People only call in if they're having serious problems, those with happy relationships don't talk about it.

[@moxythepirate1281]

@@razmiddle9410 that's a false equivalency. I can avoid burning myself on the stove with relative ease and caution. Trying to placate someone that's not happy with me because I haven't self-actualized on their timeline is much more complex and is enough reason to be happy that I'm not stuck in a resentful marriage. And if you look at the rates of divorce vs the rate of major burn trauma, I'd say that analogy falls short.

[@razmiddle9410]

​@@moxythepirate1281 As Ramsey has a habit of saying, if you make the choice to get a 4-year degree, date for at least a year, and don't get married as a teenager and don't have kids before marriage, your divorce rate drops to close to zero. Our choices matter -- if you want an unhappy marriage, you can also follow the guidelines to make that happen. There are a lot of interesting statistics around marriage -- staying single as a man results in earlier death, increased suicide rates, and more physical illness, for example, while the same is not true for women. If you never wanted children and don't end up having them, there's no regret and a lot of happiness, but if you wanted children at any point and don't have them then there's a lot of regret. And so on and so on... there's a lot of interesting research around marriage and it's a good starting point to guide our own decisions about life.

[@truthseeker1532]

“He prefers to make memories with his kids more than he wants to study”. That’s most women’s dream.

[@bcreilly180]

She has had this mental image of what her life was going to look like during marriage and raising kids. Sounds like she wants to live the "good" life. Fancy house, extravagant trips, and expensive cars. She has then noticed he's not motivated to have those things and she is being terrible towards him because of it

[@NoneYa-pg6dk]

Yeap. I have the same issue and am still dealing with letting go of what my life is supposed to look like vs. what it is. It’s called slowing down and enjoying life. Whatever lies ahead, we’ll make it even if it’s not I imagined it to be, as long as my needs are met. :)

[@NoneYa-pg6dk]

@Magnus Red if your standards make you happy then go for it. Not everyone wants a luxury life. I thought I did, but it only made me unhappy. So each to their own. Standards can always change. For now, I’m happy living life than trying hard to be someone I’m not. Thanks, but no thanks.

[@3roachkidsdhe]

My husband takes it out on me because he wants a luxury life and I don’t. I mean I like nice things but I love my kids more . I think we actually lead a pretty nice life as it is. We have a nice house and a pool. My kids go to good schools and are in activities. Yet, whenever he hears someone is doing better than us instead of being happy for them he takes it out on me and yells at me that if I was working we could be doing better. First of all we are t doing bad by no means second of all I took off to homeschool my son who has a learning disability and I have two other kids so I do t sit doing nothing all day. Third of all I am now looking for a job as we feel it is time to go back to work. I’ve been looking for a job as a PA go two months. My husband works sometimes non stop from the morning until 10pm so I am often have the sole responsibility for the kids. It is hard to balance it

[@evanjones1847]

This woman sounds toxic. From everything I’m hearing it’s sounding like she’s realizing while on air that she’s actually the problem and not him.

[@TOMMYBEETS]

That First Lady is soooo controlling it’s sad... let him choose his career the way he wants to with the help and encouragement from you.

[@David-wo9un]

It sounds like it is more her dream than his; back off.

[@razmiddle9410]

But he also needs to change his answer if she asks if he's interested in medical school. He needs to do the internal work to realize that it's no longer his dream even if it once was, and to use his words and say "no, I'm no longer interested, my priority is now being there for our kids."

[@jillians5792]

It sounds like the first caller doesn't love her husband for who he is, and is trying to control him instead of empowering him and building him up and them being a team. She is seeing everything she thinks he's not, not everything he is.

[@erichchan3]

The wife was looking at her husband like a house fixer upper. She is just looking at the end goal of him working and making money so that she doesn't have to work anymore. Clearly she should have saw clear signs that he didn't want to be a doctor so why force him. Let him decide what he is passionate about instead of a dream of what he could be.

[@Cyblps]

First caller was annoying to listen to. Whiny and not able to verbalize what she truly wants until Dr. John pressed her. So frustrating

[@jordo613]

"He prefers to be at home...with the kids." The audacity!

[@3roachkidsdhe]

Right!

[@Unknown26557]

This is the exact type of woman men tell their sons to avoid. Controlling and insatiable.

[@erichchan3]

Its the modern woman nowadays.

[@sabrinadunn8099]

Wowza I was screaming through that first call. Cut him some SLACK it’s a marriage not a corporation.

[@williambetzelberger6128]

And there are corporations out there that don't even put that kind of pressure on their top people. I think she really needs to take the intensity down several notches, or else he's going to feel that nothing he is doing is good enough for her. (Full time work, full time school, and dedicated family man, I'm not sure what else you can ask for out of a mortal man)

[@KailaWalker]

3rd caller: "As a Christian, what do I do about my pregnant, Atheist, live-in gf?"...Sir, really??

[@ominous450]

Religions are full of hypocrites

[@anneshirley9560]

@@ominous450 I think most people say they are “ Christians “, because they believe there is a god out there, but that’s where it ends. They don’t read the Bible, pray, or try to live their life for God. That’s only a minority.

[@Chunkylover1582]

Being a Christian and all those things can go together doesn't make you a hypocrite. Sounds like my wife and I prior to getting married. You are only a hypocrite if you are actually preaching to people not to do the things you have no problem doing yourself

[@leewood28]

Here's what the title should be: "My husband won't follow through with my goals for him"

[@chrissy1448]

Sad but true..

[@isay207]

Or I cant change him into what I want him to be

[@brandonkoster2192]

She’s entitled. I wish he would have called her out on the fact that it was very clear that “goals” to her are just code for social status. I highly doubt these are his actual goals deep down.

[@anneshirley9560]

He kinda implied it when he said that she’d have to give up the dream of saying she’s married to a doctor. That’s not word for word, but basically what he said.

[@ominous450]

What does the first caller do for a living? How is she contributing? What goals for herself does she have? The husband is working and going to school

[@ryanbwilkinson89]

This. So much this. He's working, going to school and being a dad. How much more does she think you can pile on his plate until some falls off?

[@jacobmorres9817]

@@ryanbwilkinson89 fax I wish he asked her what she does

[@erichchan3]

She probably wants to bum around the house and take care of the kids. lets be real....women dont really want to be the breadwinners no matter what they say especially in a marriage.

[@dark_winter8238]

Usually the issue is the dad not wanting to play with kids. For him doing that working full time and going to school is better then average.

[@hawihawi9260]

I left a relationship like this. Its exhausting being the pusher

[@zee-zm1io]

Being a doctor is a long term commitment. He will even get less time with his kids. He doesn’t want to go there. I don’t think this woman wants this type of man though.

[@brandonkoster2192]

It’s almost kind of cute how she thinks everything would be great if he was just a doctor.

[@rainbowfrequency1]

Right? That's when things can get really problematic!!

[@fredbeall6320]

Becoming a doctor doesn't mean he's going to gain economic drive. Inknow nurses that make more than doctors and doctors that work as little as possible to pay the bills. You can't force drive.

[@maam-yj8ph]

@@fredbeall6320 exactly. If you don't have even the drive or the brains to get into med school, it's only going to get worse. By the time you get in and/ or fail your boards, you could end up buried in six figures of debt with nothing to show for it.

[@weekenddiaries7975]

You are correct, seems like he is not sticking to his goals or not getting done. Maybe he is not really into medical school. He is going to just accumulate debt if he doesn’t finish it as fast as he can that will be very bad for their family because she will have to pay for it too or will be affected as well.

[@KatieLHall-fy1hw]

I don’t think it is exactly about that, it could be about him not having drive. For example, my husband works hard, but all he wants is to be with his friends. And already thinks about the time ending when is is WITH them. We have discussed him doing farm work (he says he wants to do) and finding new work, so long as he is doing something. He keeps saying he can’t and says he feels trapped. He is trapping himself. Now I am here to support, but it is really hard to not have him drag me down

[@mikemcallen2212]

1st woman is an adulterer walking. Unless she looks into the mirror and truly makes a change. The first guy to show "ambition" or has "nicer" things will have her wanting to leave her husband. I put those in air quotes because those things can have different visual definitions

[@jones2277]

bingo!

[@annwallace9537]

You have to be on the same page with your partner as far as goals are concerned. You need to discuss these things in advance. People don’t magically turn into who you think they will.

[@DeinGeldvonBeem]

God she choked so Hard when you droped that trouth bomb. Well done dr D Cause somebody gotta tell her

[@SherryEllesson]

Med school is so competitive that if he gets into one and isn't ready to put the rest of his life on hold, he'll wash out the first year.

[@monsitime9370]

People should not be thinking of “oh I’m glad I’m single” but more like “where were the parents who didn’t teach this kid about love, respect and hard work”

[@maam-yj8ph]

I wonder if as a kid the husband was always pressured to succeed without an honest assessment of where his interests and abilities are. If he really wants to work in the medical field, he can become a nurse, resp. therapist, occupational therapist, physical therapist, physician assistant etc. without necessarily becoming an M.D. Any of those positions would be easier to do with flexible hours anyway. Did Mrs. Driven A Type want to work a full-time or part-time career? To me it's never quite made sense for the goal oriented, driven person to be the stay- at-home parent unless that's the only place where the motivation to work comes out.

[@auemmjee]

Most people have fucked up parents and don't need to ask that question.

[@alexandervilla5673]

It's awesome that Dr. Delony finally has his own big stage. It looks awesome and he looks awesome in it! Hopefully more people step up and seek advice on how to help themselves.

[@ethicent4888]

I genuinely want John to tell us a fishing story!! I have a 3 month old and I cannot wait to get to take him fishing!!

[@gwendolynstanfield2653]

Not going to church does not mean letting your children run the house. I am an atheist, my children did not run my home.They are extremely moral, fantastic adults now. When they got older, I allowed them to go to church with their grandma, if they wanted to. I did not allow them to be forced to go. I refused to allow people to indoctrinate my children with their beliefs. I did not indoctrinate my children with mine. Funny thing, when you don't force religious beliefs on kids, they tend not to have religious beliefs. Just like you don't believe that Vishnu exists because you weren't told every day of your life that he does. Or if you are Hindu, you don't believe in jesus because you were told that Vishnu is god every day of your life. Children are gullible souls, highly susceptible to brainwashing. I still taught them to be good people, based on empathy and compassion for other people, not fear or the idea of being watched. I taught them to always do the right thing, especially when no one is watching, because that is the definition of your character. Moral systems were around long before the story of jesus, all of the religious mythical systems had them. P.S. I also did not ask them what they wanted for dinner unless we were undecided. I made dinner, they ate it, period. I also did not let them order from the kids menu at restaurants unless it actually had a real meal on it. No chicken nuggets, mac and cheese or hot dogs if we were going out to eat, they had to eat real food.

[@chrism2042]

My "ex" acted like this woman. I worked full time, then worked evenings and weekends to pay the bills but also building a client base. Never good enough for her! Every time I would mention starting my own business, she would go nuts and want to argue. Yet, working two jobs was not enough! After catching her at another dudes house "just friends and needing someone to talk to" BS, even though he opened the door while she was across the living room trying to get dressed, she had to go. A year later I started the business that she said would fail. What would you know, I worked all of the time and was broke with her. Within 2 years in business I had a fleet of trucks, 35 employees and a job list with blanket contracts for years to come. I was then investing more every year than her and her boyfriends annual income combined, all while I was raising our 2 young children. Taking the kids to her house one day when her boyfriend wasn't there, she went into a crying spell about how bad she messed up and wanted to get back together. I just laughed at her and left her sitting on the porch crying like a child. Looking back at the situation, the only thing holding me back from goals was the "ex"!

[@nicolab2075]

Why on earth did she want you back? You sound awful.

[@martyohlfest8699]

A person can never impose their own expectations on another. She needs to back off.

[@timothyhurley8711]

I have noticed that Dr. John frequently tells people to have the spouse come on the show. Does this ever happen? If it does, could you guys put both the clips together in one video and post it?

[@financialfreedom1991]

Yes there is. I'll find the clip for you

[@financialfreedom1991]

21:48 search the clip entitled "should we cancel our engagement?"

[@stephensantiago603]

Id rather get a root canal with no novocaine than have to deal with that first caller. But, I place most of the blame on him. He should have nipped her whole little attitude/situation in the bud on day 1, better yet on day 0.

[@richthepup]

Man Dr. D... You really put your foot in this episode, congrats to you sir. Appreciate the help you're providing

[@merryhall3722]

My husband and I just had the talk from the first caller. It's tough. Still not sure where we are headed. She really loves Him and is trying to help... He probably just isn't self aware enough to tell her where He is really at even when she asks. I had to go with actions speak louder than words.

[@nailahdawkins]

22:10: The second story is cautionary tale of dating/rushing into marriage too soon and catching unsavory things and issues about your now spouse. Now you're stuck. You have a 1 year old boy and you *know* you're not leaving. THIS is the prime example of why you wait to marry, wait to bring a child into this world. I hate when she says "I am debt free". That is *both* of your debt, *both* of your bills, and so much more. You are now solidified to him. It shouldn't be a one siding marriage. I do like that you will need to re-configure the financials and control them because he needs that structure until you can trust his journey to maintain sobriety.

[@alladreamwedreamed]

Hubby needs to switch gears if med school isn't happening. He would make plenty of money as a PA. Or go for nursing, this can be good money even part time.

[@Foxie635]

My husband depleted our bank account, NEVER have a mutual account. Even if you commit to someone, does not mean they man will be responsible or cares. You will be financially ruined.

[@subslammed8725]

Wow she is nuts.

[@terralroberts2088]

Dr. John. You nailed it with Annika. But on the other hand she’s too controlling.

[@benascg-ll7sq]

Lesson from call 1 : never marry your performance coach😢😢😢

[@becky4604]

Whatttttt The Used??!! I’m SO impressed with your taste in music👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 You keep surprising me!

[@z31Joshyman]

Dr John is a gem

[@chloeflores8043]

He should have not have banged an atheist girl if his faith, Jesus was so important to him. Then call and complain afterwards about faith differences when she is already pregnant? This dude is working backwards. So irresponsible.

[@anyagee9467]

Right?! So hypocritical. Very convenient to be religious in theory and not in practice.

[@Eyore82]

I bought my copy right when it came out. Good book! Also, i love Kelly's nickname!!

[@alfmar95]

Man.. I love your show. Keep it up brother

[@benwhitnell]

You’re already married lady. Too late for red flags, whatever color he brought you’ve gotta wave it! Edit: holy cow, this one’s all on her. Dude works, is going to school, is a dad, and that’s not enough? I DO see some red flags, just not where the title implies.

[@JJJJ-he8bz]

He needs to dump her immediately

[@katwilliams2950]

If she couldn't accept him for how he is then she should not have married him

[@JJJJ-he8bz]

@@katwilliams2950 she has all the red flags and will cause him to crash he can do better

[@jesussaves89]

American mindset more more more. Never content. Peeps gotta chill out

[@AndreaRuralMN]

2nd wife needs to hold the reins on finances for way more than 30 or 60 days! Needs to be after 1st YEAR of continuous sobriety with continual work with a sponsor and meeting attendance!

[@TheAgentmigs]

She needs to drop the reins and let this man do his thing.

[@Mysterious_Moon]

Gosh, just talk to him calmly and in a kind tone of voice about what he wants to do, and then accept his answer. He's not a mooch, and she needs to change her perspective on this or leave since she doesn't seem like she wants to compromise.

[@comment_account2343]

I am really confused too why they are so down about the med school application round. It takes on average 2 cycles for non-traditional applicants to get in, many people don't even get an interview on their first cycle. I know many people with Ivy League degrees and PhDs with research AND clinical experience AND top MCAT scores who were rejected by all the 35+ med schools they applied to. Medical school applications are brutal, it is not something that you can really plan on anymore. You may or may not ever get in. He applied to only 20, which is pretty low for non-trad. His rate is actually excellent. He will get in next year if not this year. But if it doesn't want it now, it not going to be magically better once he is in. Each year gets worse than the previous one until your 2nd or 3rd year of residency. Financially it probably doesn't make sense unless he is looking at a below $60k job otherwise. All these years without salary and not contributing towards retirement will be brutal on the family finances. It needs to be THE ONLY thing that makes him happy for it to be worth it.

[@PrescottCaliberClub]

The first caller was complaining about things so many wives have called into this show devastated that their husbands won’t do. Human beings are so damn complicated. It’s so hard to understand and/or navigate. That whole call baffled me.

[@michaelsmith5583]

This lady is insane. Just listenning to what this guy does makes me tired. Goodluck finding what you want. You seem impossible.

[@suzannemiller993]

Gretchen Rubin (author of The Four Tendencies) would say he is an Obliger while she is an Upholder.

[@acadiareinhold551]

The call with the lady with the alcoholic husband... I feel for her so much...

[@kariclements430]

I see personally differences that can easily be worked through, this relationship can be great, if they could understand the differences between them.

[@GardenerEarthGuy]

I'm too scared to order the book!

[@spiritualservicesgodbless7641]

THANk yOu FOR THE VIDEO

[@tonniareed8631]

He is so very right. I have been the “mom” to my husband taking care of everything in the house and kids. Not quite sure how to turn things around at this point.

[@auemmjee]

Stop taking care of everything.

[@candiceteeter9757]

AT LEAST a decade to become a doctor. SHE wants him to be a doctor. She has no idea what that life could look like.....

[@bethanybrowne3803]

Med school is obviously not this guys dream...she needs to let it go.

[@lovette7684]

How did she get as far as marriage if this is a problem for her? These types of passive men are passive from the beginning of the relationship. Mind you, I've been there before, but it is probably a reason why I didn't get married to that particular person...

[@YNWAlfc08]

For real ... women are very smart , how did she not see his ceiling. Her drive is through roof and didn’t see the same with her husband while they were dating ?!?

[@janeddooee]

At some level she might have been drawn to him because he is so passive, which lets her control their path and their goals without him getting in the way.

[@razmiddle9410]

I loved the question of when she started seeing him as a less of a man, what a great armor-piercing question that cuts right to the chase. I think she's gotten some great advice here and will hopefully put it into action. Delony called her a doctor, presumably she's a medical doctor already. She can be the primary money earner and he can be more of a flex parent who has a regular 40-hour week job close to home, if both of them are willing to accept it and to put in the work of shifting how they see themselves and each other.

[@regb6989]

Sounded like she has an attraction issue. She’s taken on the masculine role in the relationship and... You have a practical working solution but those gender roles need to be addressed first. She’s trying to get him to a “respectable” position.

[@pierrehenry3483]

@@regb6989 she shouldn’t have gotten married to the man in the first place. However, he seems to be doing a lot as is. He’s a dad, works full time, goes to school for his masters in biology and wants to go to med school. Seems he’s doing everything but she’s pressuring him because she of her image in her head of what her life should be like with the social status of a doctor husband. The woman literally says he likes being home and spending time with his children. Sounds like a great man, she’s gonna regret making this all about status and money.

[@regb6989]

@@pierrehenry3483 that applies to both of them. If he knew she wanted that status and image of a husband all along it’s just as much on him. We only know so much about their relationship and communication between the two. Overall it’s just as important to know why someone likes you as it is why you like another person. Image needs to match reality or there will be a reckoning at some point.

[@razmiddle9410]

@@pierrehenry3483 She asked her husband "do you still want to go to medical school" and he said "yes." Women aren't mind readers - if she asks a straightforward question and he answers, she should take him at his word. If he doesn't really want to go to medical school, he should say so directly.

[@pierrehenry3483]

@@regb6989 Fair point however there is nothing in the story that suggests he doesn't want to be a doctor. He is still taking all the necessary steps to become one. It just seems based on the wife's perspective that he enjoys spending time with his family more. As we said he works full time, does school full time, parenting full time just like her and has been applying to med school. End of day people should still be allowed to change what they want to do or focus on in life (if that is what he truly wants) as they aren't struggling and he isn't lazy not even by the slightest. She comes off very domineering and he is more passive so the dynamics looks pretty skewed.

[@RonaldrDeleon]

On the first caller, why didnt he asked her what has she done or what does she do so great that has that high standard for the husband?

[@Chunkylover1582]

How is waiting a year to get married rushing things? My wife and I got married after a few months and I wouldn't really say that's rushing... its different for everyone

[@candacelashae4236]

I need to make a call about my dad

[@meganparker8703]

Lol @ caller 3. He’s got some personal issues to work out because this clearly is not about his values

[@Shadowwind4]

Hi Megan you look very pretty on your profile picture, can I take you on a zoom date?

[@jghetto85]

First caller is proper delulu, you can hear in her voice how, during the call, she is realising SHE is the problem.

[@bunggbungg7787]

She’s gonna cheat on him

[@jutde]

She already has.

[@arlenefisher1164]

Dr. John, wondering why you don't strongly suggest 12- step meetings for alcoholics/addicts. ?

[@marlenbatista9642]

The 1st caller is still frustrated that he's not going out to get what he wants or says he wants. Whybhasnt he figured this out himself. Why hasnt he said I dont want to do this, I'm not feeling it and get on to doing something else.

[@Swisspastel80]

That husband wants someone to be there for his kids and his wife clearly is not focused on the children

[@weekenddiaries7975]

Because wife is the breadwinner, husband is not a good provider, he goes to school and work but doesn’t finish it, it can be tiring to always be depended on

[@jim2386]

He married a masculine woman. I hope that “strong personality is a fun trait” was sarcasm. Right?

[@boxingmamaD]

How do we call in?!

[@crazeekids9744]

She has some serious control issues and it takes one to know one. She’s terrified, for some reason, that if she’s not constantly pushing him that he will end up being the “bum” Dr John painted that sits sound the house all day doing nothing. Eventually, he will get tired of not living up to HER goals or HER expectations and then that’s that. It’s a shame, because she talks about him like he’s a decent guy and she is pushing him down and pushing him away.

[@Margatatials]

What more from this guy could this woman possible want? I think she is justifying an internal insticnt to treat her husband like she is his mother because that was her parents dynamic, this man is most women's dream guy.

[@Silversky627]

Sometimes your thoughts aren't what you live. This is her issue to get through, not his. She sounds naggy and inconsiderate.

[@TheAck201]

ANNNDDD another bash your husband on air episode.

[@marbs8615]

People need to stop rushing into marriage and marrying people they don't know. This might fix the problem.

[@TheAck201]

@@marbs8615 how about not always complaining and be happy in your marriage.

[@mikemcallen2212]

I'm glad people are talking about this different perception. There are amazing husbands and fathers out there that focus more on the family while also having a stable job with a good paycheck.

[@larissagonzales6075]

She needs to stop trying to change him. I dated a good guy but he wanted different things had different ambitions and I had to end it because I didn't want to control him. He is now married with two kids and living the same life, but that is what he enjoys.

[@_heyimbritt]

The 3rd caller gonna have to take a real hard look at this situation. Lightly put if the Biblical value to be married to a believer means something this would be a path I’d highly reconsider as far is marriage is concerned. Especially the deeper one gets within their walk with the Lord the more it becomes your life and that’s something you want to share especially with someone your considering marrying. 🙏🏾

[@salonsavy6476]

Omg !,, what does this woman want ?,, some us us have been seriously abused and devalued ,, wishing we had a good man to love us ,,,

[@salaltschul3604]

The first dude, I feel awful for him. He's a kind husband, a good father, working and studying (to become a doctor, no less) and it's working for him....so why would you want to change what isn't broken? Leave to poor guy be.

[@DrDisasta]

But can she choose what she wants for dinner?

[@siddheshmirjankar910]

The guy is satisfied with how things currently are. He lacks ambition. His wife on the other hand is highly ambitious. I'm ambitious too so I can relate to her. But she cannot force her ambition upon her husband. She's taken the masculine role of the relationship while he's taken the feminine role. Ideally, they should go along with it. She should start med school while her husband should be a stay at home dad. Her ambition will ensure that she aces med school, becomes an MD and earns a 300K income. That'll improve their lifestyle dramatically. Both get their way. The only caveat is that she shouldn't completely lose attraction towards her husband for being a bum in her eyes. If she does, she'll probably leave him for another doctor.

[@dougprentice1363]

Man, I feel sorry for the husband of the first calller.

[@dabd8175]

JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY

[@ineedhoez]

The first caller do it to herself. NEVER marry someone who isn't exactly what you want. It isn't fair. It is not fair to you or him. It is possible that he sold her a bill of goods.

[@cashway0420]

God damn the pusher man

[@emmawilkins5755]

The guy is working and studying and she says he is a good dad too. If she doesn't chill out I think he is going to start feeling inadequate and will see her as a mother figure. That's really not attractive. I think the issue is not with him but her unrealistic expectations.

[@mariaking7376]

Poor bloke!

[@maukasara808]

She needs a therapist. She’s has big time control issues.

[@joesillamanrs7189]

She sounds difficult.

[@kelseyyoung865]

I’m sorry but I feel like this ladies complaints are really stupid or just miss directed he seems like a great guy he’s putting in a lot of work I think she needs to give him a little slack

[@denisseg9103]

girl you are TOO CONTROLLING! live life enjoy it together. stop living on a schedule. don't get too busy making a living you forget to make a life. chill out. take a xanax

[@crissieasmr7765]

Hello, he’s the feminine in the relationship and she’s the masculine. She wants to be the feminine but she acts masculine (driven, goals, management). He’s confused because she claimed the throne. Now, he likes this dynamic. If he doesn’t want to be a doctor, that’s fine. If someone isn’t self motivated, many times it’s because they’re forcing themselves to do something they don’t like. If she approaches him like she’s the man, why is she surprised he responds like a woman? This dynamic is fixable but she needs to let go of being his mammy. Also, the second one wants to leave her husband, which she should. It sounds like she was sheltered and didn’t understand that addiction is a serious problem.

[@sXePunkV2]

3rd caller seems like a daft, hypocrite who won't even talk to the partner he knocked up

[@Losochill]

Most women can JUST NOT BE SATISFIED!

[@benascg-ll7sq]

Becoming a doctor...whose goal is it?

[@isay207]

Hes an irresponsible alcoholic lets get married and have a child😢

[@oroville12345]

Equal poot guy is with a feminist she's wants him to be a workhorse non stop poor guy.