Narcissists Abandon You. Therefore, You Must Leave, Go No Contact And Understand The Difference.

Narcissistic abuse is an undeniable crisis. Discover Healing, Empowerment, and Authentic Living...
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The Royal We has helped Millions to escape the grip of narcissistic abuse. Here’s a deeper look into what narcissistic abuse looks like and steps to heal from it:
Narcissistic abuse looks like:
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often show little to no empathy for others, making it easy for them to manipulate and exploit. Narcissists use various tactics such as gaslighting, love bombing, and devaluation to control and dominate their victims.
Common Tactics Used in Narcissistic Abuse:
Gaslighting: Making the victim doubt their own reality and sanity.
Love Bombing: Showering the victim with excessive attention and affection to gain control.
Devaluation: Undermining the victim’s self-worth through criticism, belittling, and emotional neglect.
Isolation: Cutting the victim off from their support systems to increase dependency on the abuser.
Triangulation: Using others to create jealousy or competition, keeping the victim feeling insecure.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
How to begin healing from narcissistic abuse:
Understand that you have been enduring narcissistic abuse. This awareness is the first step toward healing.
Get Help:
Work with The Royal We to get the tools to understand and process your experiences. Visit - www.jointheroyalwe.com
Establish No Contact or Low Contact:
Limit or completely cut off communication with the narcissistic abuser. This helps you gain emotional distance and begin your healing journey.
Rebuild Your Self-Esteem:
Engage in activities that boost your confidence and self-worth. Surround yourself with supportive, positive people who value and respect you.
Educate Yourself:
Learn about narcissistic abuse and its effects. Knowledge is empowering and can help you recognize patterns and avoid future toxic relationships.
Practice Self-Care:
Prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Regular exercise, a healthy diet, adequate sleep, and mindfulness practices can all contribute to your recovery.
Set Boundaries:
Develop and maintain healthy boundaries in all your relationships.
Connect with others who have experienced narcissistic abuse. Join The Royal We Support Group - theroyalwe.kartra.com/page/ynE48
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[@chrino21]

You can’t help or save them because, really, you already did. You offered them the love, acceptance, peace and security that they’ve looked for all their lives, and you would have never given up on them. You saved them! But they can’t make any use of those things. They live in a world of suspicion, blame, deception, anger and rage. And if you press them or hold them accountable, they can quickly and explosively become psychopathic and psychotic. You did your part - you saved, loved, helped. A normal, loving person would value and savor that for eternity. But not them. You did right. Now let it go...

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯

[@paulothx138]

Thank you, i did my absolute best but got discarded anyway, she told me she was unhappy, there is no winning here.

[@farwm6651]

💯 Beautifuly said

[@afrozonne7541]

Yeah but you can really heart yourself because you are a human also

[@theresasarvis4280]

I so needed to read your post❤️ I’ve helped my sis her entire life, through drug addiction, pregnancies ( adopted and raised her daughter), her violent outbursts towards me...ect. I’ve taken her back into my life countless times only to be bitten and attacked over and over. As a Christian I did all I could do, gave her love, grace and direction. But I’m letting her go now. I’m 65, she’s 61, this has gone on since she was 13! I love her and pray for her..but I’m done being her raft and punching bag😢

[@sylviaamodeo7090]

Highly UNSTABLE people

[@Eg-jd9zt]

They are a mess

[@nataliaoksztul5464]

One minute they love you, the next they dont

[@r.p.8906]

Natalia Oksztul oh no.. they NEVER loved and don’t know how to... narciss fell in love with his own reflection... we are the water or the raft :-)

[@AZDC99]

Nope, they're going to reject that to you or me because we DARE to challenge their DOGma of worshipping themselves (while pretending not to at the same time)

[@creatorattractor4189]

Yes they are sick

[@syedaraza3331]

they leave because they have someone else who they are ready to begin the cycle with. They use, abuse and discard you like you're a paper towel.

[@lollic307]

Yes.

[@missdomo21]

Yes.

[@kekehaleeey1391]

Letting go of someone you thought you may of had a future with is the worst feeling dude … 😢💔

[@itsallberrygood]

I couldn't agree more

[@wendygoddard6610]

It is because you feel so betrayed and like your whole life was a lie with them It’s devastating but it’s not a real life that is reciprocated by the Narcissist. My ex narc husband lied cheated physically abused me and left me. He emotionally and verbally abused me ect. It was never enough. He is still trying to Hoover me and bait me back in just to spit me back out again. He’s done it three times since we’ve been separated in two months but I won’t be stupid and played like that anymore because all he’s doing is trying to hurt me. He has no intention of changing. He has no intention of working things out. He already has another woman he’s been living with, he is just a player of my emotions. It’s like he gets off on it. How bad can I hurt you emotionally today? How bad can I set you up thinking that I still love you and I want you back and I want to see you and make plans to do all those things, but then right before we’re supposed to meet you pull the plug and say you’re not coming and you can’t do this anymore blah blah blah.. They’re so toxic that’s not love love yourself respect yourself walk away hold your head high never look back and don’t respond to anything that they say completely block them from every platform you can and have peace knowing that you will never be treated like that again !❤

[@carriedillmann4455]

I FEEL NO REGRET GOING NO CONTACT! I THANK GOD FOR PLUCKING HIM OUT OF MY LIFE!!!!

[@nazasha5584]

Garbage takes itself out Carrie,I thank God

[@AstridNagelSA]

Amen! Ditto

[@subliminalawarenessbeautif6878]

Absolutely.

[@aungar2403]

I feel like God said "this is enough."

[@ollyball7817]

AMEN AND AMEN!

[@noname-by3qz]

Hey everyone... It's just supposed to be a lesson. Not a life sentence!! Stop beating yourself up.

[@marcsmith5017]

Thank you Sherry. I needed to hear that!

[@CodyCole80]

Exactly! 💯

[@donnafoley9684]

Ok😊

[@MJ-qb5ph]

Wow! I for one needed to hear this. Thank you

[@vickimerritt2832]

it was aleady a life sentence for many, who cannot no contact.

[@sirg-had8821]

Cutting contact is the only option. They don't care, they will never admit their own wrongdoing, they'll pin the whole thing on you, and they've already jumped into bed with your replacement.

[@katarzynaukasiak3927]

This is what happened to me month Ago. She found someone else, told me she never Wanted to be with me in the first place , and its all my fault. We have been together for 5 years. I dont remember her being nice to me. 😢

[@tonibreen5560]

Keep remembering the fact that when the narc thinks of you they think, "What else can I get from this person?" That helped me go no contact like avoiding a potential life threatening situation.

[@lollic307]

It also helps when you literally have nothing left to give.

[@AZDC99]

Not to mention through enormous ego eventually saying, "What else can I get away with doing to this person on occasion?!" No more DUPERS DELIGHT smiles from them in my future! Only you or I can fix the situation like this (because they sure as hell won't.)

[@JanineRupp697]

You give the best analogy of how they are opportunists that drain their victims financially, emotionally, and spiritually.

[@oscarwilliamson6163]

Janine Marie Rupp,You are beautiful,Hope you are not with a narcissist.....

[@user-gk4id5qk6f]

My ex-husband abandoned me brutally way before the divorce. He neglected me, and despised taking care of me when I was sick. I had to take care of myself. Long story short.. I finally had enough of the abuse and filed for divorce. Life hasn’t been easy but God has given me more peace than I’ve had in many years. Thank you JESUS!!!

[@cr3062]

Everything is highly unstable in a narcissists life.

[@wolfgang7812]

Even Lady Diana was seen as unstable by her narcissistic. Ex in-laws

[@elizabethd.2398]

Yes, this resonated with me. In a nutshell, narcissists are like fleas -- they jump on you when you're available and suck the lifeblood out of you -- then they jump off when they see another source. After they've sucked the other source dry, they jump back on you just as you're starting to heal from those wounds. They also give you fleas!😖🦟(Darn, I don't have a flea emoji.😕)

[@cindyc]

They give fleas a bad name. Lol

[@TheMar0115]

Peace Joy or a tick who gets bigger and bigger the more they suck the blood out of you.

[@jamiecronin967]

Lie down with dogs.

[@ddtaylor549]

Lol! Love that! Flea emoji's, lol!

[@marypizzolato4801]

Great Analogy!!!

[@eternall808]

Narcissists view human relationships as conveniences....

[@nickyreed1976]

Yes so true .my narsisst said the same thing for his own daughter when she came to visit him.from Texas...

[@natalijamartina]

As items😔

[@nrosa4051]

Yes

[@miriamcooper1320]

This is why I have been no contact for 2 and 1/2 years. I don't think I will ever contact him ever again. I am doing well. No stress. Just enjoying my best life.

[@salonsavy6476]

Hallelujah!,,, isn’t this the truth !,,,,,FREEDOM!!!!!!🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@givegodthanks]

Good for you.

[@miriamcooper1320]

@Mr. Happy yes, I know. Still it's very sad that people have to treat each other that way.

[@lauradelregno99]

Same here. Bye 😈

[@marypizzolato4801]

Don't. Mine tried to hoover me at the 2 year mark... unsuccessfully. Less than 3 weeks later he was back to the one he discarded me for. But not before he trashed her name to me during hoover attempt. They really never change.

[@dawn4547]

Its difficult to get over the fact that I allowed them to use and abuse me. I dont know how to reconcile that in my heart.

[@Eg-jd9zt]

I struggled with this too bc I worked on myself for years after several narcs and got duped again with another bc he was so fake. But I found the “cracks in my boundaries” and I should have walked much sooner. Don’t be hard on yourself: it’s all a learning process

[@donnafoley9684]

Dawn, The best thing that has worked for me; is that I had to forgive myself. I forgive them as JESUS commands, yet forgiving yourself let's you understand that you are human and they are masters at what they do. It's not your fault. Forgive yourself 🤗♥️GOD BLESS YOU 😇

[@maureengannaway8635]

Dawn you're not alone, I never heard of narcissism and now realized I spent yrs with a narcissist and in hindsight after watching tons of videos, this was all about me being the raft to him. I kept getting upset, then I saw a video about narcissist mothers/ fathers and bingo ...this guy was damaged to the core by these 2 ppl. It's gonna take time to get stronger. It will happen. Be safe and enjoy your day.😊

[@valerieriggins3184]

If You Can Have Compassion For The Devil....Surely You Can Have Mercy On Yourself....That's What Forgiveness for. People Give Forgiveness To The Wrong Ones Who Could Careless And Won't Change NEVER!

[@AZDC99]

@@Eg-jd9zt Exactly! I had to face myself and see the cracks in my former boundaries too. After the fact. (I finally got so fed up that I finally discarded once and for all)

[@youngsey]

"No contact" is a spiritual fortification.You Must hold your ground.Not out of anger,vindication or even cloursure.Just for you,You have the high ground now,Take it,It belongs to you.

[@mackaready1]

Thank you

[@kynathomas4809]

Amen.

[@MJ-qb5ph]

Thank you

[@treelover1050]

YOU HAVE ONE LIFE. TAKE YOUR POWER AND LIVE OUT YOUR DESTINY.

[@sarahhaywoodlifestyleedit7720]

I had a narcissist abandon me when I was going through a really bad time. He then blocked me on social media five weeks later because I didn’t chase him. I purposely didn’t contact him after he blocked me, so he started creating fake profiles to try to communicate with me. This is the bizarre stuff they do. Narcissists are lessons. If you’re unfortunate enough to have one manipulate you without you fully realising when it happens, make sure you get away as soon as you suss them out. Don’t phone them. Don’t text them on their birthday. Don’t talk badly about them to others. Just get on with your life and pretend they never existed. The narcissist wants you to chase them so they can look down on you and treat you appallingly. Do not give them the chance. Walk away with your head held high and let them carry on with their pathetic existence.

[@Lena-so2lq]

My stomach feels sick. ...my BF did something really horrible. These games of playing ~ with social media and numbers, he left the doorcam on. Didnt give me my key. His birthday is on the 14th. I think I'll let it alone. Sad.

[@noname-by3qz]

Even if they abandoned you, you have to go no contact. Because you may be tempted to keep texting or triangulate etc. Trying to fix it back together. Just be grateful it's over!

[@erikakerber3258]

It’s what l did for 2 months and nothing like l never ever existed and then l stopped no more pain no more shame God bless all of you

[@erikakerber3258]

I feel like all happened like last century like a dream a very sad 😔 dream

[@noname-by3qz]

@@erikakerber3258 so sorry hun. It happens to the best of us.

[@nancyayers6355]

Oh HELL yes!!

[@michaelking4578]

Totally. It is hard when you are trying to detangle from someone you have a home and child with. But it is possible and time makes things easier it seems as far as those details which tangle you up with them.

[@sylviaamodeo7090]

Your message is GOLD to someone with any sort of intelligence

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯

[@mira99ist]

Narcissist discard is the best gift from the narcissist but the way they do this is so humiliating.

[@ladennayoung2939]

True. That is only because people are not people to them. People are things that they can possess/own, and use only for their benefit if you let them.

[@ShiaGirl18]

I felt This!

[@givegodthanks]

I so agree if you let them, no more narcky I'm done.

[@laughoncomedy2923]

rosey bless me too am totally done with them all I really mean business if they are useless that’s their own choice

[@givegodthanks]

@@laughoncomedy2923 💯💯

[@rubenbell7685]

Damn sweetie I feel all of that and she don't get to come back this way especially after she told me he makes her happy LOL I found my exit

[@DreamingwithD]

I tell you, cut off their contact. Just do it!!❤

[@sylviaamodeo7090]

Even Marriage is Temporary, it is only for financial gain. MONEY makes the MASK Slip!

[@zacharykassner9002]

More than money. The whole thing with Narcissists is to keep a facade to the people they use to supply them with telling them they are still a good person. They use marriage as a way to gain small supply from the spouse while they look for new better supply or quick highs. Then when they think they have found a better supply they discard you but use you to make it appear they were the ones abused and that they had to get out. That way when they bring the new supply the people close to them won't judge them as much because they will believe their facade. The money is just extra gains if they get it.

[@rakeshbhansali4907]

Zachary Kassner you are correct but they do need the money.. my going to Cheater wife who was caught will get 50% of my hard earned money. When I saw her emails to the lawyer she even wanted money from my woodworking tools? This gentleman is bang on? She was exposed and the new supply left her after using her! She came back and I did forgive her but my PTSD kicked in and I had flashbacks and I said stuff to her! I’m still paying for her apartment and everything?? I need to stop and put an end?

[@MIRNA_LIZ]

EXACTLY 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 MONEY + others gains

[@MIRNA_LIZ]

@@rakeshbhansali4907 Yes !!!!!!!!

[@ServantStatusMinistries]

Yup that is why it is wise to marry someone who is devoted and loves God because as Jesus says you can not serve both God and money. You will hate one or love the other. You will be devoted to one and neglect the other. Someone who loves money looks at people really shallow and as objects and something you can do for them because they see in perspective to how money makes them see the world but when you love God you love the things God loves which is people and not money and materialism but righteousness and love, humbleness. These things are life but money can not produce the things of life that only comes from God.

[@pehandekuss]

The narcs I dealt with(ex-spouse, her kids, my sister, and mum) were concerned about cash. The more the money, the more they pretended to "care". I survived from cancer. I could not work for awhile. That's when they revealed their worst. That's when I had to think differently. That's when I saved myself. I walked out without telling anyone where I was going. I disappeared from their life. It happened after 22 years. I loved them. That's why I stayed with them for this long. I don't now. I don't hate them either because hate is a negative energy. It hurts the hater more than the one who's hated.

[@RealLadi228]

This is all of them!

[@GuitarMatt]

My sister and mom too. Not to mention the girlfriend they brainwashed against me! As a 50 year old dude I used to believe my mom when she said that the common denominator was the person complaining. Until I became one of her overt victims too. (But the feminazis in my family will whitewash that as me being a so-called"misogynist"). Bonus point time: I find it ironic that bunch of heartbroken women throw around the narcissist label on men as if they're the biggest narcissist when it's really the other way around

[@Driven94bliss-m1r]

This happened to me , and I’m only 23. Everything that happened to me at my worst all revealed people around me and their true character. I lost a best friend , and a boyfriend. I cannot believe people are just too opportunistic but the minute your down and out, they leave and pretend they don’t know you. And now that I’m back healing, and have my life sorted a bit out, they come back like nothing happened .

[@emilytorres4862]

I’ve been through so much in my life and this has to be the hardest thing I’ve gone through - being told I’m lover and an hour later watching someone leave me like I’m trash is never going to make sense

[@ladyvirgo9514]

Very difficult 💔my husband of 12 years left in May. Changed his number and shacked up with the secretary from his work like me,my daughter, our 9 pets and our home like we never mattered to him because we don't! Hard to cope with this realization

[@Journey_1111]

@@ladyvirgo9514so sorry you went through that 💜

[@subliminalawarenessbeautif6878]

They have supply everywhere but will reverse back to us as back up. Ignore ignore ignore. That's where our healing can truly begin.

[@lollic307]

I closed with a bang. Hes not bothering me ever again. He makes me sick and I made sure to be as disgusting as possible at the end ...it felt shitty but it keeps them away

[@christinewatts3992]

FINALLY SOMEONE WHO CAN EXPLAIN NARCISSISTIC BEHAVIOR IN A WAY THAT MAKES COMPLETE SENSE. THIS GUY KNOWS WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT!!

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯

[@simoneseiami5938]

Beware of Narcs!!!! Absolutely true, better get it soon before you become another "victim" of their evil personality. Manipulation all over the place, don´t believe a single word, its only lies, lies, lies, run as long as you still can. And be aware of the trauma bonding, really dramatic, don´t underestimate.

[@annclairepahlavi7622]

You will never ever figure them out. Trust me. Give it up. Life is short and precious and you have so many more rewarding things you could be doing for your own life and for the lives of people who deserve your love ❤️

[@schofield4836]

Yep, they also bully and abuse their rafts when they are riding them

[@Real2k25]

Yea definitely bullies

[@cyndigooch1162]

Lisa Schofield I've noticed that not all rafts are treated equal, so to speak, though, as I've been abused before, or more than others. 🙁

[@star3006]

I left them going no contact... ... it’s OVER!!!

[@robinjohnson8149]

When you start to miss 'em and you will, get help before you make that fatal phone call.

[@RealLadi228]

Abandonment and rejection never felt soooooo good!😊

[@Denzo_Mos]

These are the worst individual by far,never knew about narciasists until I personally met one🤔 glad guys like you ave come out to save Empaths from these beasts

[@tarafox6618]

They jump off, usually when we need a friends support the most. So true. The hardest part is dealing with character assassination and flying monkeys afterward.

[@carriedillmann4455]

HE PLANNED THE ABANDONING ME! I was no longer his main supply Now he’s gone back to his ex wife x 2!! She’s a loser to take him back! She’s got him now and I’m certain is miserable and I AM SO HAPPY HE’s GONE! Thank you GOD!!!!!!

[@TheMar0115]

Wow. What a loser for sure. That’s so depressing to me. You go girl. He’ll find his way back to you too. Stay strong 💪

[@salonsavy6476]

Kudos 👍🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊

[@heaven7360]

You go girl!! Congratulations

[@nazasha5584]

Carrie sorry really hurting you will heal myne is 12 days ,thanks for the encouragement Godbless us all here

[@Eg-jd9zt]

They truly are pathetic. My last ex just tried to hoover me with a fb friend request when his ex after me and him had several breakups in 2 months. I denied it. I found it laughable he thought I’d go back after how he treated me. They look so stupid coming back

[@Nursegurl82]

This was one of the best analogies I’ve heard to describe that nightmare that we call a relationship with a narcissist. Very well said. Thank you so much for painting a picture we can truly understand & grasp.

[@TheRoyalWe]

💯👑🧡

[@gracesanity6314]

I saved myself. No guilt or shame when l realised. I dont love him. I pity him. Very fine line. Now l have freedom to be me. I got away. Amen

[@crowquilltarot]

This was exactly what I needed to hear this morning. I married and divorced my husband TWICE. This was decades before I ever heard of narcissistic abuse. Recently, eight years after the divorce, I have gone no contact. I have said that he left me no choice but to leave because in truth, he abandoned me. Even therapists didn't know what I was talking about. He NEVER left, even after divorce, he hung around being my "friend" - but he was ALWAYS keeping his distance. His heart was never for me. Well said. I've often quoted the Indigo Girls song: "when it was up to you, you left it up to me..."

[@ZonMezz]

Note: the raft is a great metaphor. But it's a little more like if they are clinging to you, they are on TOP of you. So they will desperately try to get that sweet oxygen, while drowning you in the process. They won't even check to make sure that you're breathing, as long as they're ok.

[@treelover1050]

THEY ONLY THINK ABOUT THEMSELVES AND DON'T CARE HOW THEIR BEHAVIOR AFFECTS YOU.

[@joannturi3968]

It sure makes things easier and less stressful. When they leave your lucky. To me it's a blessing in disguise. They want to abandon you to hurt you. They want you to feel inferior. They want you to feel their pain. Again lucky if they leave first, then and only then can you say.....I've been spared.

[@mynewlife1911]

They are bullies on an adult playground. They do not deserve any of your time or attention or anything at all. Get out there and make a good life for yourself, you certainly deserve love kindness fun respect❤️. Take good care of you❤️

[@TheRoyalWe]

Amen, you are absolutely right

[@MJ-qb5ph]

I think part of the sensation that comes after no contact is that you tried everything and nothing will ever work and to a sane person this is very hard to comprehend

[@oisinroche6464]

They destroy the most special opportunities , over and over again, i have gotten to the point of walking away, i gave them so much , no more.

[@James-yl6zm]

The worst kind of person! Animals, predators, snakes!!!

[@lollic307]

Yes. Ive been physically emotionally psychologically sexually and verbally damaged. The next narc will kill me. There cant be a next narc...life is too short. Get it together people. Forgive them but don't forget. Forgive yourself. You did shitty things when under the spell. Ask God for forgiveness and keep it moving. The key is to keep moving

[@Lena-so2lq]

​@@lollic307i said that after a lifetime being raised by one. I missed this LAST ONE. Its really hurting. Really sick.

[@Rid97527]

i’ve never felt so understood, reassured, and connected when it comes to this topic. SOMEONE gets it. thank you so much, sir. wow.

[@stephw3475]

My ex ghosted me this year after 3 years together. This video really hit home. It hurt to listen to everything because of all the pain I’m going through. My narc ex never came back though. It’s been 5 months. Thank you for uploading this.

[@marierose6792]

I truly have been saying that I had wished that I had been ghosted. He was so psychopathically cruel, destroying me with such force because he had taken all our resources and had a decade long affair. I gave everything to a long marriage where in he acted like he adored me to the world. 5 years NO CONTACT. I almost did not make it out. Feel lucky, Really.

[@stephw3475]

Marie Rose sorry you had to go through all that. I’m glad you’re five years out. Letting go is really hard. There’s an attachment bond. I’m having withdrawal symptoms and it’s been really bad but I know I have to stay strong

[@cindyc]

@@stephw3475 just keep in mind that the love bomber was a mask, and was only employed to manipulate you and others. The sheep never existed. It was merely a costume.

[@dawn4547]

Having the narc not return is a blessing in disguise. As tough as it is you will get through it and be better for it.

[@erikakerber3258]

Same here l really though something was really bad in me made him abandoned me ghosted me like you and l broke my soul my heart my mind but l see they do the same to everyone so sad 😞 be strong you can diu l can do it

[@awakenow4048]

He told me I am the disgraceful one for not giving him a chance to have a "conversation".....he just wanted to flip the script and be the one to break up with me. I took that from him.....no reaction. No Contact!

[@gtporschers]

I was used by a Narcissist for ten years. Yes she abandoned me twice. She was toxic. She used me & totally abused me. I have now left her. I have severed all contact with her. I’m done. She has no empathy, sympathy, respect, understanding & she wants total control. She’s cold, cruel & downright selfish. I’d not be surprised if she tried at some point she try for a third time to try to woo me back again... 😡😡😡

[@HeartFeltGesture]

I made the important link that because I was attracting Narcissists it meant I was wounded and groomed to take abuse by my family who I realized were narcissists. Find this out, it's the beginning of making sense of it all.

[@salonsavy6476]

Yes ,, I’m finding this out now ,, it’s all so clear !

[@janettemartin4604]

Totally the way of it! It’s shocking at first and a bitter pill to swallow. You in NO WAY deserved, provoked KNOWINGLY any ill treatment for yourself! You were TRAINED to take IT!

[@newmamaful]

You might be interested in Toxic Parents and Mothers Who Can't Love by Susan Forward.

[@nohandlerequired3607]

very true

[@wolfgang7812]

No we don't attract narcissists; narcissists attract us.

[@silvanaramirez9941]

This was a GREAT video because it speaks the truth! They cannot commit to be there for the relationship... it’s all about them and their gains. It never feels like a give and take relationship. It feels like we constantly give and they take, take, take. THANK YOU for all of your videos. God bless you for helping others 🙏🏼💗💜

[@classicheraldgameplays5364]

Lmao they climb up on our raft and thank the raft not the person who let them on the raft. Perfect example of a narc. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🙏🏽This made my day 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🙏🏽

[@yvettevazquez3561]

Second time around is worse did that and I regret it broke into my home and robbed me NEVER TAKE THEM BACK THEY'RE NOT HUMAN!!!!

[@MB-tr8sq]

SMART!!! TRUE,TOO.....They are NOT human....they are demons from their ‘father, the devil’. Their life is hell and their mission is to drag you there with them. “To seek, to kill and destroy “is their goal John 10 version e 10 BUT!!! The rest of the verse says “god came to give us life abundantly” 😊😊 CHOOSE HIS OFFER AND LET THE EVIL ONES GO‼️🥰 Ask His Help & protection🥰✝️☮️

[@diazrigau]

You nailed it, your presentation is excellent, is exactly like you said. I lived with a narcissist for 8 years, I was the happiest person, because he made me feel like a Queen, nobody treat me better than he did, until he didn't. In my case I left him before he jumped out of my draft. He was dangerous.

[@sandyfan5888]

What you said is so true. He abandoned me after 5 years, after I asked him about our future. He abandoned me one day after I asked him this question he had no answer of, and he blamed it on our age difference. This is really really hurtful, not just being abandoned and heart broken, I lost my confidence about myself.

[@DACRYPHILIAC]

How are you doing now? What ever became of the a-hole?

[@abdulc5726]

You and I will be amazing and better very quickly.

[@DB-qm4mt]

I hope that you have moved on and down great 😊

[@sandyfan5888]

@@DB-qm4mt I have moved on, and I feel light inside. He did try to contact me and even pretended things were never changed. However, I am a much stronger person and I can see through those games he is paying. So, I am alone, but I am much better. I couldn't thank you enough for helping me getting things cleared in my mind.

[@wandaandre2341]

This very thing is happening to me again! The narc left again! Many thanks for this explanation now I understand so grateful.

[@lush1276]

Wow.. I needed to hear this.. The amount of times he has given up on us.. When in reality he has given up on himself And i cant save him.. 😔 I didnt even reply to him leaving again.. But the raft wont be here when he starts swimming again. I never wanted him to drown. But im slowly drowning with him. I have to let go now.. 😔😭

[@Jezebel066]

Exactly. When you see them drowning you swim out to save them. And they just pull you down w them... drowning you both.

[@georgejgilles.3999]

I've been married to one for over twenty years in summary they are just users and when you find out they get very angry with you. I defended her but she gossiped about me. We have six children and she files for income tax year alone and steals all the money.

[@mynewlife1911]

Certainty equals boredom for them. They get bored w faithful trustworthy people. They’re truly disordered. Good that you know now so you can leave and create a life for yourself that’s fun to wake up to every morning.

[@TheRoyalWe]

They are disordered

[@svetlanas3220]

This is the best explanation of narcissist. I can see clearly now. There are so many videos about narcissist, but you make it so easy to understand and accept. I'm trying to survive a really bad narcissist and I will. Thank you for making these videos and support us 🥰

[@danetteperez3863]

Oh, my goodness! This describes my husband !He comes back and forth but it is only beneficial to him. When things get rough; he bails. Then if things go downhill with someone else; he wants to come back. I am always left holding the bag. He is always ahead of the game. I am the raft.

[@Sophie-uc8vp]

Thinking back, although he used to say he couldn't do without me I also recall him saying life was like a bar and he was the barman and everyone just passes through. I said 'what about me?' And he thought for a second and said 'oh you're behind the bar with me' but I wasn't, was I? He knew I'd pass through like everyone else even though he knew full well that he was it for me, I never wanted to date again. I loved him 😔

[@elizabethdupuch44]

John <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="512">8:32</a> 💜 I felt so alone but these videos help me realize 1. That I am not and 2. There is a bigger and better life out there for my big heart to give a lot of love AND receive. Thank you 🙏🏽

[@heidipelkola623]

The raft analogy was so accurate. I was married to a narcissist for almost 11 years. We have kids together so I can’t go no contact, but he’s very difficult to co-parent with. He is still going strong on his smear campaign and character assignation against me over 6 years after divorce. Thanks for this video.

[@donnalints5595]

So sorry you are going through that . My poor son inlaw has 3 children with my narcissist daughter. He is doing great with dealing with this bc her family is all for him giving him emotional support to get thru this. The divorce is not final yet, she is playing games dragging her feet but I believe the lord is with him and will help him. It’s been 16 years married and we all witnessed the verbal and emotional abuse she did to him all these years. He has all his ducks in a row on this now and between school councilor, teacher, family doctor , and private counciling he and the kid’s go to it was strongly recommended to file for no visitation or contact with the children and they don’t want anything to do with her after they witnessed her very derogatory behavior to say the least. It’s so hard to believe that’s my daughter but yet the definition of narcissist fits her to the letter.

[@charmainenduku8225]

The whole thing is mentally abusive and I feel only GOD can fix this . I’m so overwhelmed with this. I did my part for 4 years with a fake relationship and I have to heal

[@Christian_1980]

I like the simplicity of these videos. No music, no pictures or (annoying and irrelevant) video scenes. Just you and the camera. Insane skill you have. Good job Kevin. Simple, to the point and fresh.

[@GuitarMatt]

Kevin hits a homerun on this one! It's so hard to get to a point to admit that someone keeps abandoning you when they try to trick you into thinking it's the other way around

[@donnafoley2167]

It's hard when you're left abused by these monsters. Then you have to deal with the emotions of being used. My Mother, husband, brother etc. You said it Kevin, "Taken for a ride." As I look back and now know I was just a Raft, Wow! I have thrown these suckers in the water, sink or swim oh well. Not my business,not my problem. JESUS has called me to a life of Peace, Joy, Prosperity and Health. No more free rides!!! GOD BLESS YOU KEVIN😊

[@MrDiablosmiles]

Just subbed. Man that resonated with me and i broke down crying in the car when I realized I was the life raft and allowing my narcissist spouse to continually abandon me and then swim back and I allowed it out of a sense of guilt and wanting to save her.

[@sophiaelizabethausten8152]

You made me laugh again. What a relief. I wanted to save him from his mum, big mistake. Saving myself now. 😀

[@jeanniegeorge6036]

Best description of my experience in a toxic relationship with a narcissist. Thank you!

[@skysherlimit9778]

I’ve watched oh so many videos on narcissism. This is hands down one of the BEST. This helped me so much. 🙏🏻💙

[@AstridNagelSA]

My husband desecrated every area of my life. ...then proceeded to abandoned myself and our 3yr old twins, running off with one of his numerous mistresses, without batting an eyelid.

[@auntnana355]

You are EXACTLY right. My mother did this as my Father was dying. She kicked me to the curb AGAIN in favor of my evil sister in law. There was no room for me at the family table during the funeral dinner and I was not told there was going to be a gathering at my family home after the funeral. I found out that my mother was moving to Florida to live with my brother and his evil wife. Who now BTW is emotionally abusing my mother. ( Actually she's not letting her get away with all the drama she's creating. SIL is trying to make my mother accountable. HA good luck with that!) But I went no contact after the funeral and have not responded to my mother's guilt pleas for being rescued from her toxic living arrangements that she insisted upon. So....ya made your bed now lie in it!

[@gratefulsoul1661]

Its true.. in all the videos I've watched so far regarding NPD, there's just no good news in relationships like this. It all leads down a road of destruction. No future.. we're all here because we were once victims. No More. Let go and Let Jesus handle it. We attract what we are. God bless y'all take care..

[@TheRoyalWe]

💯👑

[@suzanneschannel1]

Great analogy and description! My theory on one of the reasons why people make excuses for and turn a blind eye to a narcissistic partner goes back to childhood. If a person had a toxic parent or parents, as a child they were dependent on them. Therefore, it was a coping/survival mechanism to “see the good” in the parent instead of truly seeing the parent for who they truly were.

[@lolo50198]

Thank you for this video, I met my ex wife when she was living paychecks to paycheck i was skeptical talking to her, but when I met her daughter my heart melted.she is mentally disabled because from what she told me a former boyfriend beat her child badly she will never be able to function on her own.I helped her thru nursing school she never had to pay any Bills why she was in school. Constantly cheating on me I once ended up with chalymidia, Because of her all the things I lost being with this person. All the it was either a guy from her past or the weed connect, even though I didn't smoke weed. Always would add new males to her facebook page once she became a nurse treated me like shi@. I am glad I am away from her my life is in a better place now

[@troyoneill2679]

I knew it.....Rose on the Titanic (narc) should have moved over on the door......Jack🥶!!

[@1000mizz]

Lol I thought the same with his analogy.

[@Lxoxo333]

Wow I woke up this morning thinking about that scene 😱😳

[@troyoneill2679]

Liz did you scoot over?

[@susanmoran2154]

Yes , he was going through one of those abandoning phases . So, I left and have cut him out of my life .I am ignoring him . And that is how it's going to stay.

[@marlenr8691]

“I found a branch! Instagram!” Lol!!! This video was the best

[@lisakaler4121]

He should re name the title of the video of what you just wrote: "I found a branch, Instagram"! 😂 too funny and accurate I can't take it.😂😂

[@ChaneyHour]

😭😂

[@demigaines5644]

HI KEVIN THANK YOU SO MUCH THIS VIDEO REALLY HELPED ME TO LET GO GOING NO CONTACT

[@TheRoyalWe]

Thank you Demi

[@demigaines5644]

@@TheRoyalWe You Are Absolutely WelCome 🙏 Kevin If it’s ok Can You Do A Video On Why The Narcissists Treat You Like You Never Existed?

[@daniellonergan4498]

So I met this beautiful amazing open minded girl 3 years ago, she made me believe in fairytales and the first few months were the best months of my whole life... then soon there were strange moments where she would freak out on me over nothing, push me away and block me for days over minor little things. Leaving me feeling confused an abandoned, I would be heartbroken, then a week later she would allow me back into her life.. I would all be incredible again for a while, until another issue. We used to travel a lot Together and every country/city we visited, once she had a drink or got stroppy, even though I tried to reason and compromise with her, she would run away and leave me. Forcing me to chase her time and time again. We made up - broke up 1000 of times. My self-esteem is at an all time low and the way she speaks to me now is horrible. She literally used to call me a god, an now I am a joke and embarrassing. Problem is I try my best to be the perfect man for her, I have done everything she has ever asked and more, put my life on hold for her and 3 years later I find myself alone in Mallorca.. I flew out here to see her as she decided to go on a solo trip to Spain. She didn’t want me to come at first. But then she did.. it lasted 1 night. I asked her to dance with me. She rejected an got embarrassed. She started getting cold and angry at me, stropping and I tried to put my arm around her and cheer her up, she threw my arm off and started running down the street. We fought I got angry and upset. She left and blocked me. Now I am out here alone. It is how this whole relationship has been.

[@bk-er6wb]

Omg. Thank you. THIS was the video that FINALLY reached me. This is what I needed. This was the analogy that fits perfectly. My relationship with her for 4 years. Dumped every 2 weeks. Ghosted for 2 months. Back. Dumped 3 weeks. Ghosted for months. Back again. 2 weeks Dumped. Ghosted for a few months. Back. 2 months. Dumped. Ghosted for 3 months. Back. Etc etc etc. over and over and over and over.

[@getjazzee5378]

Perfect analogy. I was his raft for 23 years. Thank God, Not Anymore. I’m grateful, I’m blessed and life is beautiful.

[@monikakaushal3093]

Trust me. Its a blessing in disguise.

[@farwm6651]

"...Period. End..." That part Raft analogy was 🔥

[@patriciakenshima2271]

Thank you I got my power back !! I’m happy now

[@oscarwilliamson6163]

Patricia Kenshima,I'm so happy ☺️ for you

[@gracemurphy1375]

Definitely resonates with me. I was THAT raft for 27 years!!! Gone no contact and feel so much better. He has a branch that he is hanging on to now and calls it “the love of his life.” lol 😂

[@sheilaw2494]

I have family members that do this. I want to be there but not enable. They need me, I don't need them. Love God, love each other.

[@yellowrose7736]

Thank you Sir, your analogy is perfect. 10 years of being used, I think enough is enough.

[@TheRoyalWe]

💯👑

[@ravelyetman9992]

Well said brother I have never heard anyone put it like this. I have just awaken to narc abuse as a man. I feel like I'm in a zombie movie and waking up just to realize, all along I am the light and they been feeding off me but wat they don't kno is that I am on a mission to destroy them.

[@jasonstone8222]

I abandoned the psychopath i thought i could fix. Didnt mean i was the narcisssist. However opening the door to lust and yielding to temptation got me into that toxic dynamic. Due to lonliness and depression due to my own dysfunctional family after i started coming to faith and sharing it with them and then getting beat up in the wilderness. Not quite holy enough to be in church but not heathen enough to hang with heathens. And had a weakness due to impatience and just experiencing so much evil in people and not knowing how to handle it ....no real support system and after many betrayals and all. And an ignorance of what narcissism is. Vulnerable and no idea about what a love bombing psycho is. Sick of fake people. I get it all now tho.

[@shirleyspencer9423]

I'm glad I found you on here. I'm going through this with a narc. He says we don't get along, but wants to still be my friend. He's got that right, we don't get along. He stays angry with me because he can't control me. The bad thing is I've been friends with his mom for 20 year's. That's what gets me.

[@oscarwilliamson6163]

Shirley Spencer,You deserve better 🙏

[@annem2922]

This concept makes me think there’s nothing ‘Eternal’ for them. It’s all here and now for them. Makes me sad

[@waragainstmyself1159]

My fathers done this so many times. Just full on sold the house out from under my mom, and completely abandoned us. This cycle over and over

[@johnnygreen3008]

It’s crippling when it’s your mother especially when they get old because you really are leaving them for dead it took me a long time to realize, Honor your mother and father, if I were doing it to my kids I would want them to honor me and not follow me into the fire 🔥🙏🏻

[@newmamaful]

You might want to check out Mother's Who Can't Love by Susan Forward.

[@AZDC99]

Best video title EVER on this NC topic. Crucial point that's forgotten by people like me and many others in the title is that they do "ABANDON" you! This is EXACTLY why we should not fall into the FOG (fear, obligation, and GUILT) trap I watch millions of these videos lately with me so far sticking with no contact, ONCE AND FOR ALL, and this actually gives me more strength to neither go back nor torture myself any longer

[@BrideOfYashua]

After watching your video, I just blocked and deleted the narc.. I had been thinking and praying about it for weeks now! Praise Yah!🙌🏼

[@samiaaftab559]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts....so comforting words...👍👍👍

[@deeptyawasthy4156]

I'm still being stalked and afraid to share my pain

[@Dee-mj3pu]

@@deeptyawasthy4156 If you are being stalked, talk with a police detective. They will advise you.

[@johnnygreen3008]

It’s facing a Satanic attack 🙏🏻

[@MrTelecaster101]

As someone who has developed co dependency from early on as a child. This is something that is painful and difficult to do! I'm sure she noticed this behavior in me from early on and I was just too willing to do whatever it takes to make This relationship work. I fell in love with her beauty, her sex, her smile. We've had amazing times but the walking on eggshell times outweigh them. I pay for the vacations, meals and am constantly buying her gifts because I love to spoil the person I am with. I see it for what it is. It hurts but I will move on! Thank You!

[@susanservin1949]

What a great way to explain it! I was in a 14-year hell relationship

[@oscarwilliamson6163]

Susan Servin,Hope you are not with a narcissist.....