Hospital treatment of eating disorders is severely under funded and stuck in the dark ages. 2 of my dearest friends are sufferers. It's a devastating and deeply misunderstood illness. Surviving AN is one of the most heroic things a human can do. Your amazing Elzani. And your parents aren't half bad either 😉😜😉!!! ❤‍🩹❤♥🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍❤🤗🤗🤗

These videos helped me so much i love her stuff on Instagram now too!

Every time I relapse I come back to see your videos, as a way of convincing myself that recovery is the best choice. Hope I can completely let go.

I'm late to this, but I just wanted to say how incredible and compassionate your parents are. It made me cry. I grew up in a very turbulent home with shouting and abuse, and to hear a mother and father lovingly encouraging their child who is suffering was such an emotional, beautiful thing for me to see. I hope you're doing so well, Elzani. Thank you for sharing this with us.

"Orthorexia" is just pathogisation of the political standing up against ultra processed food industry. Making your own chocolate, potato crisps, icing sugar and dough and bread and sauce instead of lazily giving money to unethical corporations who cause compulsive overeating by disrupting the gut micro biome with artificial chemicals, is NOT a disease. British society is diseased for not cooking and baking everything from scratch anymore. Therapists gaslighting ppl with real EDs into thinking that their noticing how diseased their lazy UPF-buying society is, is also an ED, is a move to protect the corporate fake food status quo like good little corporate panderers.

Thank you for sharing this. The raw emotions and fear on your face, it was clear to see that that was your illness talking.

Perfect doesn't exist. It's something we chase that guarantees falling short, because we're human.

The crisp bags are filled by weight, not volume, and the air is protective of the chips/crisps during transporting. Pringles have cardboard.... other chips/crips have air. :)

I worked as a RN for 20 of the 35 yrs I had a license (multiple specialties). I've also been hospitalized multiple times for eating disorders. Something people don't think about with hospitals is that it's a survival service- not a concierge system. People are treated "the same way" based on their diagnosis, lab work, stability of labs and vital signs, physical limitations, etc. The nurses are there to do a job. That's it. I worked back in the 80s-early 2000s- and it was a little different then, but bottom line, hospitals are there for a purpose, not a personalized holiday. That can sound harsh, but if everybody had their individual list of preferences given to them, there wouldn't be time for basic care. It's there to keep you alive, and help you heal. That's it. It's an institution, and as such, people are part of a system. I'm in the US... here, as soon as vital signs are stable (regardless of weight), people are shoved out the door to manage at home- even if they have no family or support around (that was my last hospitalization when I was 32). NO follow-up, no family, no nothing but a miserable 6 weeks in a drug and alcohol treatment center that SAID they treated eating disorders. You're fortunate to have the NHS, where the country benefits from well people, so more is invested in care. Here, well people don't generate revenue, so it's a revolving door set-up that keeps people sick.

Crisps (chips in the US; we call 'chips' fries) are packaged by weight, and the added size of the bag is for air, to keep the crisps from getting smashed during transport. Weight, not volume :)

One thing Dr. Phil said that I respect- "You wouldn't worry so much about what other people think if you realized how little they did (care about what you do)." It's true- most people don't really care what other people are doing. It's not worth the energy to even bother with the 'what ifs'. I'm in my 60s, and been dealing with this for 50+ years thanks to a mom who bribed me to lose weight at age 6 when I had NO weight to lose. I have never known "normal", but I'm trying again. If not, I'll be dead in a year or two. I worked as a RN for 20 years (had my license for 35)... I've taken care of 'old' people. Twenty-two is barely out of the gate.

God I’m so proud of her!

I know it's years later, but still can't believe the low prices for food there. Near Chicago, bread (bagged, commercially made- not in-house bakery) bread was over $4/loaf unless someone gets the cheap white bread that is good for nothing. You guys have great prices (I've seen more recent videos on other channels in Sweden and the UK).

My grandma used to make pepparkakkor (Swedish ginger snaps) for Christmas. Nyaker's (brand it looks like Ikea carries) is very legit and traditionally flavored. SO good !

Frozen custard is ridiculously easy to make.... Creme Anglaise put into an ice cream maker. Frozen custard. Seriously, it's that simple and you can customize the flavors - vanilla is a great base, but there are so many options !!

One thing I've learned from my dietician and ED therapist is that healthy oils are critical. They protect the brain, produce hormones, etc. Even saturated fats like meats and butter are better than seed oils (sunflower, canola/rapeseed, safflower, corn, etc) that require solvents to extract the oil. There is NO evidence that saturated fats cause heart disease (the US MD kept part of his research hidden that didn't support his theories about saturated fat... of the 7 Countries Study, he actually studied 23, but omitted the countries that ate more fat and had lower incidence of heart disease, and was done at a time when there were ashtrays on a lot of dining room tables). The British doc who labelled sugar as a problem because of its role in inflammation (heart disease precursor) was blacklisted by the jerk US doc (I'm American, but not by choice).

Hawaii is America... 50th state.

You can grow as you refeed your body... just as periods resume, so can growth if it was interrupted while you were still growing. I had a sponsor kid in the Philippines who was 96cm and 17kg at 12 yrs old (from malnutrition from poverty). She grew a LOT after getting more consistent nutrition at the Compassion International project. She graduated out of the program over a year ago at age 19 ! Doing well, and happy !!

I think part of the reason people don't seem to want to be friends when we're still "in it" is that they don't know how to respond to the disorder- not that you, the person, isn't worth being friends with, but the disorder dictates too much of life to include "outsiders".... that you want friends is a huge plus. I'm seeing this many years after it was posted.... it's incredible how you were still so "in" the middle of the eating disorder nearly a year after the hospital and ED unit. I get it. I've been restricting more for over 3 years (lifelong restricting with periods of less restriction), and I look at how little I've done for the 2 1/2 years I've been getting help again.

The focusing on food is %100 a result of restricting. I've been there before- quit restricting (well, what I thought was active restricting.... have never NOT restricted since age 6), the obsessions go away on their own. Still have to fix the 'why' of eating disorders (feeling like a crap human being), but nutrition fixes the physiological responses to restriction by keeping a person focused on eating food- it's a survival mechanism that unfortunately gets overridden with EDs.

It's amazing to see how supportive your family is. Mine wouldn't tell people they knew when I was admitted to a hospital back in the early 80s because they were ashamed and made it all about them. I'm in my 60s now, and still dealing with this. I wish I'd had a family like yours.

How is this helpful to anyone?

I love how her mum legitimately has a good relationship with food, instead of those mums who try to have their children love food but then they're like "im old so i must watch what i eat".

I don’t. Understand how people can get that low. I literally cannot stop eating. I JUST DONT GET IT

Your hair ; OMG, I'd K*** for hair like that !

hei elzani u make very good videos, can u make again of this?☺️

This is as much an instruction on how to be a present and supportive parent as it is an anorexia documentary. They are beyond amazing! I barely knew what love and support was while growing up, specially from my father.

Anjali Manor

I'm not scared of food, calories, or weight gain ; what's hindering my recovery is my flat stomach obsession

I wish I can get thin as you did. I want to die from thinness

Smitham Camp

When I was hospitalised, I had so much resistance with weight gain. All I could talk about was me getting fatter and that’s the only thing I cried about. I hated all their food and I didn’t want to eat it and I’d cry over it. Idk how you do it I really wish I could have your spirit

You have the sweetest voice 😻 I'm so proud of you and I hope you are too ❤

The part about mum changing McDonald toy for you is soooo cute!!

You are so courageous. What wonderful parents you have. How are you doing now?

As it is said many times in this coment section. Your video should get prizes. You have done a great job. This is what young girls with an ed need. No sugarcoating, the raw, real truth. You are a fighter, a brave young woman, an Inspiration. Go on with your life, you have so much to give. And you deserve the world ❤

Seems like the hospital wanted to brute force making her better, not help her

i love how they all chose their fav meal lol <3

You ate HALF A PIZZA ???

I love how supportive your family is, especially your lovely mom

0:18 17:22 18:57 25:06 30:18

If you have insurance, go!111

Don't you feel bloated after all that food ?

Your mum looks exactly like my English teacher lol. Idk if that’s random

I could never eat so much in one day ! Where do you put it all ?

You are amazing ❤

I've had bulimia for 3 years. You are so incredibly strong, I know first hand how difficult recovery is. I know you don't know me but I want you to know that I'm proud of you and that you should be proud of yourself ❤

You don't drink any liquids ?

You're lucky you have your mum, and don't have any medical conditions ; I have nobody, and suffer from severe neuropathy in my feet, so even if I do recover, I'd still be in pain, and nobody to care

I would look 6 months pregnant if I ate all that. !